THE CONTEST

He walked purposefully up to the saloon door. "It's now or never!" he thought. Looking over the clapping doors he saw his brother Hoss Cartwright standing. Little Joe Cartwright decided to go inside.

“Are you entering that contest?”, asked Little Joe.

Hoss looked questionable at his younger brother for a long time.

“Joe, which contest do you mean?”, he asked.

Little Joe sighted deeply and explained, “That cake contest of course. Who eats the most little cakes wins. Nobody in the area has a bigger appetite than you. the price is five hundred dollars. Being your anchor in this contest I get of course the lion’s share of the price.”

“Dadburnit’ Little Joe Cartwright!”, called Hoss called out indignant.

At once it was deadly quiet at the Silver Dollar Saloon. Everybody was looking at the Cartwrights.

“Indeed I do enter but without your anchor. If you want to win that money you enter yourself!”, was the answer of Hoss.

He went outside where his horse Chub was waiting. A moment later Little Joe followed to go on his horse Cochise to go home. They mounted on and rode back to the Ponderosa.

At the Ponderosa the Chinese cook Hop Sing was already busy with supper. Ben Cartwright, the owner of the Ponderosa Ranch, and his eldest Adam sat on the porch. Near them played the three year old son of Adam, Mitch.

“What a peace and quiet as long as those two troublemakers are not here”, Adam sighted.

“Say that again. Don’t let them hear that you call them troublemakers”, Ben reacted.

“Pa, you are right. I actually praise them with that and I insult the other troublemakers”, Adam answered.

He looked for a second at his son.

Then he said, “I hope not that Mitch later will get involved with the plans Hoss and Joe.”

“I rather think that your son will make sure that their plans with him fail”, said Ben.

Adam couldn’t deny that and in secret he hoped that actually too.

On the way home Hoss and Little Joe were still quarrelling.

“Hoss, you have to prepare yourself well for the contest. The person whom you need for that is your mental coach. I am that for you”, said Little Joe.

“Just forget it! I prepare myself for that contest at my way and not yours! Now I don’t want to hear another word about until we are home”, Hoss reacted very excited.

“Then you must know it for yourself. If you lose then don’t come crying to me”, Little Joe said insulted.

“If I win you won’t get any cent from my prize money!”, said Hoss.

Little Joe quickly stuck out his tongue out of dignation. Silently the brothers rode until they rode upon the yard.

Adam had Mitch tight and said, “Kid, there come your Uncles who always get themselves into trouble. Especially Uncle Joe.”

“I am not in trouble”, said the boy.

“No, fortunately not. And that must stay that way. But your Uncles will try that anyway, even though they love you very much. Go and see if you may help Hop Sing”, said Adam.

He put Mitch down where after the boy ran to the kitchen to help the cook. Adam walked back to his father.

Ben said, “I suspect that your brothers are having a row again.”

“When they aren’t quarrelling Joe will make Hoss happy with a dumb plan that will fail with guarantee”, Adam chuckled with a firm draught of sarcasm in his voice.

The rancher started to laugh whereby Hoss and Little Joe got fearful suspicions about a hateful remark of Adam about them.

“Hoss, I see that nephew of ours nowhere. Mitch probably will make Hop Sing believe that we don’t need a dessert”, said Little Joe said suddenly very friendly but cautious at the same time.

“That shall be the case. That little thing starts to become as sneaky as his father. It is about time that we step in before it is too late”, was the answer of Hoss.

They dismounted from their horses.

“Pa, Adam, you know about the cake contest which the party commission organizes. Hoss enters it too and I am his mental coach. Then that five hundred dollars is for us right away”, Little Joe said excited.

“Joe! I have told you before today that I really don’t need a mental coach. and certainly not in the person of you!”, Hoss said fierce.

Now Adam couldn’t stop laughing anymore Ben thought it was funny as well.

“Joe as your mental coach? don’t make me laugh. It isn’t April 1 today, is it?”, Adam asked with tears in his eyes.

“Why?”, Hoss asked amazed.

“Yes, explain that big brother”, said Little Joe.

“If Little Joe really is the mental coach of Hoss for the contest, then that is the joke of the century. Everybody in the area knows that the plans of Joe go straight into failures. especially when it concerns money and Hoss is involved. I am sorry that I must say it but it is the truth and that is always hard”, Adam ended his expert explanation about his fit of laughter.

Ben thought it was very funny but his two youngest sons naturally not.

“Very funny Adam. Where is that nephew of ours anyway?”, Little Joe asked insulted

“In his skin. And that whole thing is in the kitchen helping”, his eldest brother answered.

“So that will be a very little dessert again”, said Hoss said complaining.

“Hoss doesn’t get a dessert at all because he has to build up his hunger for the contest this coming Sunday”, Little Joe said quickly.

“That is up to me and not to you short shanks”, Hoss replied.

He picked up Little Joe and threw him into the water trough.

“That will teach you to interfere with my business!”, Hoss said fierce.

Hereafter he walked away to take care of the horses. Ben and Adam were rolling on the floor of laughter whereby Little Joe got even more angrier. To make the humiliation even greater Mitch came out of the kitchen. He saw that his Uncle was lying in the water trough and got funny eyes.

“Uncle Joe, when I take a bath daddy always puts me in the tub. And then I have my clothes off. You clearly don’t”, Mitch said dry.

Now Ben and Adam were laughing harder. Little Joe got up and splashes flew out all directions.

“Is it today ‘Tease Little Joe Cartwright day’ today? Everybody seems to have me today”, Little Joe complained.

“No Joe. It isn’t that but of course we can make that day if you want that so eagerly”, said Adam.

“Hop Sing says that we can eat”, said Mitch.

“Then we go to the table. Adam, tell Hoss that supper is ready. Joseph, put on some dry clothes”, said Ben.

He picked up his grandson and carried him inside. Meanwhile Little Joe put on dry clothes.

Adam walked to the stable and brought over the delicious message. The eldest Cartwright boy wanted to hear it from Hoss.

“Hoss, we can eat. Maybe we can put Joe at his place”, said Adam.

“What do you mean?”, Hoss asked amazed.

“Now simple. Sunday is that contest being held. Because there is also a horse auction I hardly can have Mitch with me. Pa is going there too. Around that same time that contest is being held”, said Adam.

“And because I have to be at the cake contest I cannot babysit Mitchy either. So our little brother must do that. So that he cannot bother me. Brilliant plan. Do you think that Joe will babysit your son?”, asked Hoss asked laughing.

“I know that almost for sure. Joe has babysat Mitch much times before and they are mad at each other”, Adam answered.

“We say nothing to Joe”, said Hoss.

Together they walked to the big ranch house to get the supper inside themselves.

A few days went by without speaking about cakes and/or money. But on Saturday evening Little Joe got again an attack of mental coaching.

“Hoss, tomorrow is the contest. I want to give you some more advice”, said Little Joe.

Adam and Hoss looked at each other laughing and the first one nodded. Little Joe didn’t understand nothing about it and looked at his brothers with distrust.

“Joe, I have to ask you something”, Adam said a bit hesitating.

“Just ask. You know that I am always there for you”, his youngest brother said.

“Tomorrow during that festive day there is a horse auction. Pa and I are going there. Can you babysit your nephew during that time then?”, asked Adam.

“Of course I do that. But I also have to support Hoss at that contest”, said Little Joe.

“That won’t be so because Mitch is very attempting and I don’t that you lose him”, Adam reacted.

“By the way, with such a little one you attract even more attention of the girls. They love little children”, said Hoss.

“There you have a point of course. Adam, I will take care of your son like he was mine”, Little Joe said excited.

“I know. I know that he is eager to be with you too”, Adam answered.

Ben said nothing but he knew enough by the attitudes of Adam and Hoss.

The next morning was the day of the cake contest. Even though Hoss entered the contest he chewed away a breakfast or three.

“Hoss, you mustn’t start to eat now. Or you will have no room for all those cakes. We must win”, said Little Joe.

“We mustn’t win. I must win. You have to babysit your dearest nephew like you promised last night. Besides, I always have room for food”, said Hoss.

He threw another sandwich with bacon and eggs inside his throat.

“Poor Mitch. Now he is stuck with his Uncle Joe all”, said Ben said teasing.

“Say that again. But I will take good care of him despite all the hustle”, Little Joe reacted.

Adam knew that too.

After breakfast the Cartwrights went to Virginia City. Ben, Adam and Mitch took the carriage and Hoss and Little Joe went by horseback to town. When they arrived there it was already very busy. Hoss went to announce himself at the cake contest and Little Joe looked after his nephew.

The cake contest was the first event of the day. Hoss saw the cakes standing and couldn’t wait to start eating. He grabbed a chocolate cake. Suddenly Little Joe pushed against Hoss. The cake in his hand flew through the air and ended up with an emergency landing into the face of Vera Stone. Both brothers saw that and couldn’t stop laughing anymore. Juliet Harris saw that and grabbed a raspberry cake and threw it at Hoss. Fortunately he was distracted by his nephew so that Little Joe got the cake into his face.

“Mitchy, there are daddy and grandpa. You go to them”, said Hoss.

The boy went straight to Ben and Adam.

“Hoss Cartwright! You are hatefully thanked”, Little Joe groaned.

“Why? You mean heart fully”, Hoss reacted amazed.

“No, hatefully because when you bent I got that raspberry cake into my face. He was meant for you”, Little Joe said angry.

“Gees Joe, you do look like a little pig with all that pink in your face”, Hoss laughed.

Because he knew that he couldn’t take Hoss on physical Little Joe had to that mentally.

“Hoss, look in front of you”, he said sneaky.

Hoss looked and promptly he got a cake in his face. But he wasn’t the only one. Soon all contestants of the cake contest were busy throwing cakes at each other. Meanwhile Adam had taken his son upon his arm and watched with him and Ben at the cake throwing. For the security they had gone a bit further from it.

“I like this more than the planned cake contest”, Adam smiled.

“The party commission obviously have had another idea of the contest. But I must admit that this is very amusing”, his father replied.

Just when all the cakes were gone Vera Stone came up front and yelled with a loud voice and very unladylike, “Hereby the cake contest is cancelled.”

Mitch saw her from up close and said to Ben and Adam, “I didn’t know that a choc cake could talk.”

“Kid, we are already going to the carriage to go home”, said Adam said softly.

He turned around and walked quickly with his son to the carriage.

Ben walked to his two youngest sons and said, “Adam and I are going home with Mitch and you two both too! Now!”

Hoss and Little Joe walked along at once.

“I don’t want to get any problems with Mrs Stone because Mitch called her a choc cake”, Ben said near the carriage and the horses.

Hoss and Little Joe couldn’t stop laughing anymore.

On the way to the ranch Hoss said, “I feel like having a great piece of cake.”

“You are sick”, said Little Joe.

“Those cakes might have been delicious but like Hop Sing bakes them, nobody does that way”, Hoss reacted.

The others agreed with him deeply.