Non-kin Interactions
From: Grace Chew <gclchew@yahoo.co.uk>
Date: Mon, Oct 6, 2008 at 9:43 PM
To: vsg@u.washington.edu
Dear List:
I have a question regarding some terms.
Are these terms still used in NON-KIN interactions among Vietnamese now?
(1) dượng (stepfather);
(2) mợ (wife of mother’s younger brother);
(3) thím (wife of father’s younger brother);
(4) dì (mother’s younger sister; stepmother); and
(5) già (mother’s elder sister).
When you respond, please also let me know where you're from: SOUTH/NORTH/CENTRAL Vietnam or, please name the place if outside Vietnam.
Thank you all for your warm assistance as always.
Much appreciation,
Grace
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From: Minh Tran <mtran.csulb@gmail.com>
Date: 2008/10/6
To: gclchew@yahoo.co.uk, Vietnam Studies Group <vsg@u.washington.edu>
As a Southerner, I like to point out something. The first four terms
are commonly used in all three regions; the first one "duong" has
multiple meanings besides stepfather such as husband of aunt on both
sides.
The fifth term is not commonly use since, I believe, is an ethnic
term. Often used among the hill people. Someone can correct me on
this one.
MInh Huynh Tran
PhD Student
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From: Grace Chew <gclchew@yahoo.co.uk>
Date: Mon, Oct 6, 2008 at 10:06 PM
To: vsg@u.washington.edu
Dear List:
I have to make myself clear in my earlier question.
I was asking if those terms listed in my e-mail are still used as speaker- and addressee-references in non-kin interactions today.
Best wishes,
Grace
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From: Grace Chew <gclchew@yahoo.co.uk>
Date: Mon, Oct 6, 2008 at 11:52 PM
To: mtran.csulb@gmail.com, vsg@u.washington.edu
Dear List:
Sorry, I'd need to make myself clear in my earlier question.
I was asking if those terms listed in my e-mail are still used as speaker- and addressee-references in NON-KIN interactions today.
I have forwarded this clarification e-mail earlier. I wonder why it hasn't reached VSG...
Thank you, Minh.
Grace
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From: Nhu Miller <trantnhu@gmail.com>
Date: 2008/10/7
To: gclchew@yahoo.co.uk, Vietnam Studies Group <vsg@u.washington.edu>
Grace,
I would also add:
cau/mo
which refers to maternal uncle/aunt
AND in certain families in north
and central Viet Nam - father/mother
The reason being a dodge from heaven in calling
your parents uncle/aunt instead of mother/father
Also in Hue, we call our parents: Thay/Ma
meaning Master/Teacher and Mama.
T.T.Nhu
Hue
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From: Molly O'Connell <meh145@columbia.edu>
Date: 2008/10/7
To: Vietnam Studies Group <vsg@u.washington.edu>
It's interesting that Cô Như would use thầy/mạ ('nang' tone?) in Hue - it sounds so "khách sáo"! In the rural parts of Quang Tri/Quang Binh most people use "Bọ" ("nang" tone, no circumflex) for father, as well as "Mạ" (nang tone) for Mother. It gets a little more complicated as you move up the family tree, with Mệ (sp?) for Bà and Mụ for Bà's younger sisters. Dì becomes "O" and so on... These, of course, are used among the Kinh, although when I've read interviews of minority women in Quang Tri, some use the local dialect ("O" for Cô, etc.) when addressing Vietnamese journalists.
Molly Hartman-O'Connell
On Tue, Oct 7, 2008 at 8:20 AM, Grace Chew <gclchew@yahoo.co.uk> wrote:
Dear Nhu,
I find your information interesting because according to my Northerner friends, 'thay' for 'father' is archaic.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Minh,
Thank you for sharing how you use the kin terms as well.
My Northerner friends still use 'gia`' for the elder sister of the mother.
However, I'd like to ask if 'di`' is still used in North and Central Vietnam for women who are not aunts - that is, related by blood /marriage to any of the family member like the use of the term, 'co^', which can signal speaker- or addressee-reference in non-kin interactions.
I get different views from people raised in the same region, that's why I need to check again.
Please keep your views coming in. Cam on nhieu.
Grace
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From: Minh Tran <mtran.csulb@gmail.com>
Date: 2008/10/7
To: gclchew@yahoo.co.uk, Vietnam Studies Group <vsg@u.washington.edu>
I personally believe that this addressing of non-kin associates are
beyond formality. In English, when you meet a people, you address them
as Mr., Mrs., Ms., etc., which are more formal. You would not address
a male business clients (older than you) as Big Brother John or Uncle
John, which sound awkward in English. In Vietnamese, we try to close
the gap to feel more like relatives. Next time I see my professor, I
will attempt to address him as Uncle Mike, etc. and see how he react.
Minh Huynh Tran
PhD Student
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From: Hue-Tam Ho Tai <hhtai@fas.harvard.edu>
Date: 2008/10/7
To: Vietnam Studies Group <vsg@u.washington.edu>
All my Vietnamese students call me "co."
Hue-Tam.
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From: Grace Chew <gclchew@yahoo.co.uk>
Date: Thu, Oct 9, 2008 at 6:53 PM
To: vsg@u.washington.edu
To reply Diane's query:
"O" is used for Chi/em of the father (father's elder/younger sister).
Outside the home, and in places near Hue (e.g. Quang Binh/Quang Tri),and especially in the rural areas, "O" is used to address women who are older (than male/female speaker), and for women whom we would normally call 'Co^' and 'Ba'c' elsewhere. "O" also conveys more intimacy.
I hope this reply is satisfactory.
Best wishes,
Grace