amwiwsig-2

cionghunx huathuix ee amwiwsig -2

--- JUNG (Bunchhai huan'ik)

DERR ZI JNIUX

DIONGHAK SING'UAC

hionghiongg

ui' qau qau ee hunn tamr tauu knuar

oa! itcer longxx bingliauu ar!

jitmaw guaw si guaw jurqiw

dirr jitt xee sikig

ham' jurqiw sionghue

Duiww guaw laii qongw, jap-id huer hitt nii digvet u iwgi, guaw zip kir Basil dairhak irvirkyx, qywvet ixjingg ee ving'iuw pnua, jinjniar jinwzip liauw "dua sewqair". Hiax u jerje kuanser ee dua zinbut, druar dirr kuah bongbongg ee dua dongr cur/ jre lewdauw ee bexciax, qongw iugnaw ee Dikgiw/ Huatqiw. Inx qniaxzii cingrcah hniaxbak/ hongdo piauped/ lakdew-aw ginpiyr buanw buanw. Jiaxee u jnii langg qniaw jitmaw si guaw ee dongyc, tniax inx qongw, dirr Alps dorqar ee jingqingw, simtauu qaujid diyc cniqniax/ uanwdor ee simjniaa, Zurich ee quansnuax inx vreh .quer/ simrjiww knuar quer dua haiw, guaw juwsinn siongr inx, hyxcincniu inx si laii jurr lingrgua jit xee sewqair, laii jurr hng ~ ~ byy hxuad qaur/ vehseh kamr bat bat, qngngiaw cak langg bak ee quansnuax buexliu/ laii jurr jin' pnaiw siongxsiong ee dua haiw. Derr id vaiw, guaw caqag gunw daux nacc jiacc sanr! Vaxvah jixsirr jngkax jit xee sanr bogsux, guaw si viw sanr bogsux qyckacc sanr ee qniaw, ree puawkangx, dirr haghau jid'err jre lak diamxjingx, buec-aw damm, byy tangx ngua ... guaw kaisiw iong byy qang qakdo knuawtai verbuw/ bad inx ee qankow/ digvet dongjingg vaxvah; cuwbi ee si, duiww maxmah dyrr byy hiacc je kuanliongrsimx/ jongw qamxqag ix viw vaxvah kacc qiongbingw, mrqyxx, itdanr vaxvah duiww maxmah huad singwde, guaw qycc kia quer maxmah hitt vingg. Jitt jiongw diyhh bingkag viauxsi jicii dycc jit vingg ee jinghingg duiww guaw ee singwqeh byy hyw. Uirr beh dirr inx ee ciongtut-diongx tuad cud, guaw vutditvud jyr jit xee ciauqib dersnajiaw, qovutjiongx pnuawduan verbuw ee sirhuix. Jex hro guaw sanxsingx liauw moxjiongw bongsiongw/ jurdai simjniaa, guaw ee jursinwsimx vunxlaii dyrr byy unxqor, jitmaw suacc u sii pongwdiongr/ u sii vyxsiuw.

Qauw huer sii, maxmah qycc snix jit xee jabow ginxaw. Vaxvah qikdong/ hnuahiw duiww guaw qongw , "ingamr liw qex jit xee siyw mexmeh.". Guaw qniax jit diyy, guaw jaix maxmah viw vingsii qyckacc dngg siqanx dyw dirr bincngg, guaw qinvunw byy dongwjyr jit huesu/ simrjiww zinruii ix byy be kiw cngg si jit jiongw berdangr guanliong ee nngxziok. Vaxvah cua guaw kir maxmah ee cngg-vnix, py jit xee knuar kiw laii hro langg sitbong ee siyw mic: qui' xee bin angg/ ziauu, ham' laurhuer-aw qang, bagjiux kreh kreh cniurr jit jiah cnemee qxauw-aw, kajacpniax snix jit qix jit qix dngg dngg ee angmox, qamxx e venwjniaa qauu? Guaw dongsii jin' cywluan, m jaix jurqiw ee qamxqag si sniaw? Qamxx qongxx duxx cutsir ee ginxaw dyrr si jitt jiongw ngiu? Inx hamhoo dramm diyc qaling, qongxx si qaling sangr laii :ee, anne qxauw/ niaux neh? Inx qui' siu cutsir jingg, qaling rair laihuee vuex zuarr je vaiw? Iauxx u guu neh? Guaw byy hxuad siongxsiong, qaling erdangr iong cuir qa jit jiah guqniaw, pen' pen' jyccann langg qongx si gubuw snix :ee, m si qaling qax laii :ee. Henxzenn, jex si qiongqax dirr guaw srinx-siong ee vehcat. Guaw kakding, maxmah qycc jyr liauw guaw vutqaix jaix ee dairjir.

Mexmeh tudzenn cuthen, guaw sanxsingx jit jiongw bongbiauw/ byy sinwzim, hnowhenn/ quancad vner qaxx jin' binxjiap. Maxmah qycc laii jit quaw quaiwqii huanxingr jingwsit guaw ee caigii: sneqniaw ham' moxjiongw hro langg' uiham ee dairjir iuxquanx, narr byy, jex qui' xee dairjir dyrr be ziaw gauw jiacc je mahuann. Jiaxee kyxlingg tuisag guaw jap-zi huer jit dnxua qinglik ee jok'iong.

Maxmah u jit xee hro guaw tyxiar ee sibquanr, dng' langg' iaucniaw guaw beh cud mngg sii, ix jongxsi ziog dirr guaw ee kajiacau qongw quaw qimgenn-giggiw. Guaw cing siongrr hyw ee snxax/ pue'ee qimx qaxx e jiyr .langg, qinxsin vyxcii cuthen dirr qongkaix dniuhap uanbiw hingsiong ee jungiamm, dng' langg dirr cialo tniax diyc maxmah dirr guaw ee aurbin duarser sniax huah ee sii, duiww guaw si jit jiongw tixziok : "m hyw be qir .did ter gunw qra inx cingxanx, pni rair crid --- qamxx u jah ciuxqinx-aw? ciuw sew byy ? ..." luirsu jitt lui :ee. Dng' guaw ee jurjunx/ hihuax, jin' sewzi sniu beh hro jurqiw knuar kiw laii uanbiw byy kiamwdiamw sii, vueduer diyc hongsinn jurdai ee jurvix, kiokk dirr zidtauu-kax henr qngx qngx. Jinjniar byy qongvnee, jiaxee dniuhap duiww guaw zuarr diongriaur lehh! Dirr guaw beh kir jywkeh ee lo-siong, qamxqag jurqiw jin' liauxvutkiw/ qyquir, jetkingr qawzit jiacc erdangr cing ee snxax, narr dirr vingsii cing, dyrr e hro guaw u jitt jiongw qamxqag. Mrqyxx, jit qaur beh vaiwhongw hitt dongr cur taujingg, uerbin sui' qaixvenr, hitt qex langg ee kuanser/ kiwpair apdyw guaw. Guaw qniax inx, qamxqag jurqiw sewbii, siongrr hyw u vongrkangx tangx nngr zip kir, digvet si cic mnglingg ee sii,dirr guaw tniax laii, mnglingg sniax naxx qauxlee, hro guaw puawdnaw/ kiw uiwqnuaa/ simx honghongg. Maxmah sursingx uirr guaw jyr jiujuann junxvi, dendyww hro dairjir qyckacc luan, mnglingg sniax naxx dirr guaw ee hnirkangx-vnix qongw "ree lacsab/ ciuw byy cingkir/ byy jah ciuxqinx-aw/ amrqunw ox." jit iongw tiaujenr simliw insor, guaw be juanxdat verbuw qaudai ee diwir, iacc si duar diyc byy vit'iaur ee qenwsiaur/ jippiah ee hing'uii. Jinghongw narr si qyckacc baiw, guaw e sniu diyc vnuawlauu ee viwbit, hro simjingg huehok vingjing. Dirr guaw qodnuax bujo sii, sniu diyc guaw si "tnazinn (Other)", si jit xee iongxiuw vutkyw cimhuan ee viwbit/ ox jiyhtauu/ cing dngsnax, dir quann by ee exlangg.

Guaw byy hxuad huesiongw donglenn bad sniu .quer ee dairjir : Iasox/ hitt xee cing ox dngsnax ee Iasohue huersu/ pix qingkacmuax, dir quann by, kia dirr bong-vnix ee langg/ cauxvox-dingw naxx bong ee vongrkangx/ lamsingr singwkiwquanx ee derha sinden/ envid ap-aw ee exlangg, jiaxee ji' qranx, u jit jiongw kanlenn ee kyxlingsingr. Iuxquanx jiuxsinn jewdenw iuhingg sii, qrngx singwkiwquanx naxx sinn ee bang, si guaw derr id xee dua viwbit/ exlangg si derr zi xee viwbit. Mrqyxx guaw hnuaw hnuaw qamxqag, dirr hitt der "linghunn jiyc (Soul-Stone)" "guaw vunxlangg dyrr si hitt der jiyhtauu" ji' qranx junjai jit jiongw quanhe.

Itdit qaur jitmaw, veh-jap-snax huer, decc siaw hueiklok ee sii, marr iauxx byy jiong' jurlaii kaisiw huesiongw ee qad tauxkuix, cniurr dandok qinx/ qix vuh cud laii ee gee, qycc cniurr jit diauu amwiwsig huatdenw ee dyrlo-siong ee ciajam. Suibongw zuxx laii zuxx byy kyxlingg kingxding Iasox, kiokk e qir did jap-id huer sii, siongrder ee quanliam kaisiw qamxqag cuwbi. Gauw hnuahiw hiongr siongrder qidyw, hex si byy maudunw ee qidyw; siongrder vingrr byy in'ui guaw ee byy sinwzim venr qaxx hogjap, qycc qongw, Ix m si cing ox dngsnax ee langg/ m si doo binrdingw ee Iasox, cing jin' suiw ee snxax, langg duiww ix ee hing'uii jin' quanwsir; sionghuanw, siongrder dogid-buzi junjai, byy kyxlingg hingsingg zimrhyy jingwkag ee qaiwliam. Ix cniurr jit xee u kuanser ee lau langg, hro guaw huisiongg buanxir ee si, u jit xee qaiwlut anne qongw "liw be qra jurqiw venwjniaa zimrhyy diausiong/ iacc si ham' zimrhyy dairjir luirsu." incuw langg duiwtai Ix dyrr berdangr cniurr duiwtai Iasox hiacc hongwsur, vixqaur guaw vnuawlauu ee viwbit, Iasox m si "viwbit",guaw dauc duac iuxsow texgno.

BYY CUWBI EE QONGKYR

Haghau kaisiw hro guaw iamrsen, ham' guaw rue jenwdoo/ sngw huew ee siqanx sna' viw, haghau henxzenn jiamr taiww je siqanx. Sinhagkyr sidjai qongw be cud ee buliauu, sowhak qyckacc hro guaw qniax. Laursux qongw dairsor si jin' jurzenn ee, qaix qra knuar jyr vunxlaii dyrr junjai, be qaixvenr ee dyrliw, guaw kiokk m jaix sowzi sidjer si sniaw, inx m si huex/ dongrbut/ huawjiyc, m si erdangr virr siongxsiong cud ee surbut, si qewsngr cud laii ee liong. Hro guaw berdangr lixqaiw ee si, jiaxee liong qycc si iong zirbuw dairviauw, zirbuw iwbi diyc snia'imx? qamxx u kyxlingg tniax diyc sowzi ee sniax? Qongw laii quaiwqii, guaw ee dongyc u huatdo sraiw dinxdang sowzi, huathen inx benw qongw dyrr bingvik. Si'angw marr berdangr qra guaw qongw sowzi si sniaxmic? Guaw simrjiww berdangr jiong' jitt xee bunrdee viauxdat cud laii. Siongrr camw ee si, guaw huathen si'angw marr byy liauxqaiw guaw ee kunwlann. Lausux jaiwsnax siongser suecbingg uirhyy beh jiong' kerdangr lixqaiw ee liong huawjyr sniax ee quaiwqii unrsngr. Guaw gno .diyc, bogdig si beh drat qaur iokhunx ee texhe, dirr jitt xee texhe vangjo ha, jerje liong erdangr virr kngr dirr qanxdew qongsid-diongx. Mrqycc jex jit diamw aw longxx be inxkiw guaw ee hingwcur, dyrliw qaixsueh qaxx u qraur benxqiongw, uirsniaxmic sowzi erdangr iong sniax laii viauxsi? Langg erdangr iong lingo ciu viauxsi a, ap-aw viauxsi b, gibun qiwhy viauxsi x. a/ b/ c/ x/ y/ z, longxx byy kurtew, inx cniurr lingo ciu qangrkuanw, berdangr qaixsueh sowzi ee sidjid. Hro guaw siongrr auwnauw ee si jitt xee dingrliw : zuqyw a=b, b=c anne a=c, qinqir dingrgi, a/ b ee iwsur uanjuann si nng huesu, qiwzenn byy qang, a dyrr byy kyxlingg ham' b siangdingw, qyckacc benw qongw ham' c siangdingw ar. Qiwzenn beh jniajyr jit xee dingxsid ee bunrdee, dyrr qongw a=a, b=b dyrr hyw ar, jitt diamw guaw erdangr jiapsiu, mrqycc a=b dirr guaw knuar laii si jit xee s.-sidjai-j. ee vehcat/ penwqiok. Dng' laursux qongzenn byy qor vinghingsnuar dingrgi, qongw inx dirr buhan dua ee sii, e siy' duxtauu ee vehcat, guaw marr jiokk siurkir. Dirr guaw knuar .laii, tagceclangg congwdi m bad zri :ee, buxlang langg/ jngsiauw :ee, jit diamw aw dyrr byy qybingg. Guaw berdangr/ byy guanrir ham' inx u quanhe. Guaw liongsimx dyrgi ham' jiaxee vingw laii vingw kir/ horsiong maudunw :ee jnedaur, hro guaw ingxuanw berdangr lixqaiw sowhak. Jidsiwlangg itdit longxx jin' jipquad siongsinr, zuqyw guaw cniurr guaw ee dongyc anne, didjiap jiapsiu a=b/ zidtauu= guehniuu/ qxauw=niaux jitt lui dingrliw, gauw e itdit hro sowhak jngsiauw :ee, itdit qaur veh-jap-sir huer sii, jiacc e iwsig diyc jurqiw virr gurlang qaur sniaw tingdo. Guaw ee itsingx ui' tauu qaur buew si jit xee bee, guaw erdangr byy gibun unrsngr, kiokk ingxuanw berdangr dirr sowhak-diongx venrzin honghiongr, iuqii berdangr lixqaiw jurqiw dirr dyrgi-siong duiww sowhak ee huaigii.

Jixu dirr guaw iong digding ee sowzi tewdai zirbuw, tauwquer sidjer qewsngr laii giamjingr unrsngr sii, jiacc erdangr lixqaiw hongdingsid. Duer diyc sowhagkyr ee hagsip, causiaw guaw m bad ee dairsor qongsid, tauwquer qiwig dirr ovangx-dingw ee digvet zirbuw johap, guaw qeqiamw u damrvyc jinwdenw, mrqycc gauw jaiww berdangr tauwquer tewngua sowzi laii jinwvo, laursux vutsii qongw, "lanw dirr jiax siaw moxmow qongsid ... " zenau dyrr dirr ovangx lyxcyw siaw quiw xee zirbuw. Guaw m jaix ix ui' dyhh cue laii jiaxee zirbuw, m jaix ix uirhyy siaw, guaw soxx erdangr did diyc ee, ui'id lixiuu si, jex hro ix erdangr jiong' unrsngr cua qaur ix buanxir ee qetlun. Gauw duiww sowhak byy liauxqaiw, hnaxqniax diyc jurqiw, m qnaw qycc mng zimrhyy bunrdee.

Duiww guaw laii qongw, sowhagkyr venr qaxx jin' kiongxvor, venwjniaa jit jiongw jetbuaa. Guaw huathen qitnax kywdingg jin' iong'i, qasiong bagjiux knuar .quer ee qiwig jin' qiongg, sowhak dyrr anne amwbuaa .quer, iauxx si quann hunx. Mrqycc sitvai ee qniahniaa/ binrduir jiuuii sewqair sanxsingx ee vibii, m na dirr guaw srinx-siong jyrsingg jit jiongw iamwhin/ qycc hingsingg qongw be cud ee juadbang/ uanjuann huixdiau guaw dirr haghau ee sing'uac. Druu jex ixgua, qycc iong "byy qraur linglik" ee lixiuu benw sriux uerdokyr, guaw qamxqag hnuahiw, jex viauxsi guaw u kacc je ee juriuu, lingrgua jit bin, qycc si sinx ee sitvai, guaw iauxx u damrvyc uerdoo tenhun, hitt sii guaw byy iwsig .diyc, qisit hex uanjuann si guaw ee qamxqag, guaw qandna' erdangr rue, qig e kiw guaw siongxsiong ee mic, kiokk virr vig rair mohongw cnemee ee Hellene sinue ee hogjewpinw (jiyhqyx langtausiong), hongw byy hyw sii, laursux henxzenn zinruii gauw su'iaur moxjiongw kacc jurzenn ee mic, dyrr qra rue jit xee ngiutauu ee doo he dirr guaw binrtaujingg. Guaw uerdokyr dyrr anne qetsog ar.

Druu liauw sowhak/ uerdoo gua, derr snax xee --- texcaux. Jit kaisiw, gauw dyrr tyxiar texcaux, berdangr iongzimw langg qra guaw qongw rair anxjnuaw jyr dongrjog. Gauw laii tagceh, si uirr beh hagsip, m si lensip byy loriong/ byy iwgi ee jabcuiwmic. Jaxqii guaw duiww sintew u moxjiongw kiapdnaw, jin' quw ixau jiacc kikhok. Jitt jiongw qniax qycc' kanlenn diyc sewqair/ amwcangwlik ee byy sinwzim. Dirr guaw knuar .laii, sewqair suiwbongw bixle/ lixsiongw, marr ciongbuanw hamhoo/ sax byy ee huihiamw. Jit kaisiw guaw dyrr sniu beh jaix, guaw beh qra jurqiw qiatog hro sniaxmic surbut/ langg. Qamxx qongxx jex ham' gunw maxmah iuxquanx? Ix bad vangwsag guaw quiw qywguec? Guaw erbunn e qongw diyc, dng' guaw jingsinn quanlingjingr hunrdyw huatjog sii, isux m hro guaw len texcaux, guaw jin' buanxir, vaituad driau hitt xee hurdamx --- qycc tunx lyc jit xee sitvai.

Guaw did .diyc ee siqanx vingrr byy uanjuann iong laii sngw. Siqanx hro guaw qyckacc juriuu jimwdimm dirrr juadduir ee qitai-diongx : duxhyw tak hiaxee lag zip guaw ciuw-diongx muixx jit dniux inwsuatpinw.

HAM' JURQIW SNA' SIONGHUE

Duiww guaw laii qongw, jap-zi huer hitt nii kaksit si quatding miarun :ee. 1887 nii harquir duxx kaisiw, guaw kia dirr dua qauwdngg qongxdniuu, danw jit xui ham' guaw qang lo dngw .kir ee dongyc. Siqanx si jap-zi diamw, siongrgnow ee kyr ixqingx qetsog. Tudzenn lingrgua jit xui javox ginxaw dua lat sag guaw jit xe, guaw dyw .lyc .kir, tauu dua lat longr diyc lorvnix ee jiyhtauu, qiongbecc m jaix langg. Qycc laii ee vnuar diamxjingx, guaw u damrvyc tauhinn-bagamr, qamxqag virr hamw ee hitt ee siqandiamw, jit xee liamrtauu siamw .quer " jitmaw liw benw qycc kir haghau ar." guaw qandna' sitkir jit vnuar ee diqag, qex dyw kacc quw .quaw, juxiaur si uirr vywhok hamw guaw ee langg. Aurlaii u langg py gauw kiw laii, sangr kir hurqin jit hxo druar nng xui lau qoniuu ee daux.

Ui' hitt sii kiw, narr guaw vutditvud diyhh kir haghau/ verbuw beh guaw jyr qongkyr, gauw dyrr e hrun .kir. Lak qywquec byy kir haghau, dagg zit naxx decc qauiuu lehh, juriuu-jurjai erdangr quixarr diamxjingx jyr bang, hnuahiw kir dyhh dyrr kir, ciurnaa-lai/ juiw-vnix/ uerdoo, qycc kaisiw rue siy' taii ee doo, jenwjingx hiongvok dniubin --- qoxlyw sniavyw jysiu qongqig/ huexsiyx, iacc si jit iac jit iac snalensuar ee ang'aw doo. Qaur dnaxx beh kunr jingg luirsu banrga uerbin, u sii iauxx e puu .cud .laii, cnebin-liaugee ee binrdar vutduan suaw dinxdang/ venr huanwngiaw, qidongx u quaw langg si kuijenr byy zuarr quw dyrr jenwsiw ee sigsai bongiu.

Daddid qongw ee si, guaw uac dirr jurqiw sinvir sewqair-diongx. Hitt xee ongqog u ciu-aw/ juixdii/ lamwde/ jiyhtauu/ dongrbut, iauxx u vaxvah ee dosusig. Mrqycc guaw likuix zinqunn zuxx laii zuxx hng, bongbu-diongx itdit u liongsimx ee koxtniar. Longrliulenx/ siujongg mic/ knuar ceh/ siwqer sngw, siqanx longrhuir driau, anne byy hro guaw kacc kuaiwlok ; jit jiongw berhiauw qongw ee qamxqag, beh ui' jurqiw-diongx dyjauw.

Guaw uanjuann be qir .did jex itcer si zuhyy sanxsingx :ee, mrqycc guaw dongjingg verbuw ee quawlu. Inx cue jerje isux laii uirr guaw jinxdir, isux inx ziaur puar taukakpuee marr byy qetqyw, jixhyw hro guaw ham' dirr Winterthur ee cinjniaa jywhuew dorqar, hiax ee huexciajam, si guaw siongrr cuwbi ee laiguann, dngw kir cur-lai, itcer qycc huehok guanjong. U jit xee isux zinruii guaw dair diyc ngiuhinn, guaw jaix ngiuhinn si anxjnuaxngiu, simlai taux ciyr, verbuw qyckacc iusimx. U jit zit jit xee ving'iuw laii knuar vaxvah, inx jre dirr huehngg nirr, guaw hnowhenn vueduer bih dirr ciurjangg au, taux tniax .diyc hitt xee ving'iuw mng vaxvah, "liw qniaw anxjnuaw?"

"aa! Jin' camw! Isux marr qongw be cingcyw si sniaw vne. inx zinruii kyxlingg si ngiuhinn. Narr si rix be hyw dyrr jin' hai lor! Gauw jit quaw bixbyw ixqingx kaix dax ar, zuqyw jitt xee ginxaw aurvaiw berdangr jurqiw cue taulo sing'uac, hiyrqyw si pnaiw iwliau or!"

Gauw naxx kir hro luii kar .diyc, iwsig diyc jex ham' henrsit ciongdut. "aixiyr! Guaw diyhh zinrjinx tak ceh or!" hionghiongg anne sniu.

Ui' hitt sii kiw, guaw venwsingg jit xee zinrjinx ee ginxaw, laii qaur vaxvah ee cecvangg, tec cud gauw ee Lading bunhuad kywvunw, jingsinn qydo jibdiongx sixqir-gnervue, jap hunjingx au, kaisiw tauu hinn, qiongbecc ui' iw-aw dingw sag lyc laii, qycc quer quiw hunjingx au, guaw qamxqag kacc hyw .quaw, qycc qewsiok tak. "guaw jiacc byy air hunrdyw leh!" qra qaqi qongw, jit vaiw quer jap-go hunjingx au jiacc qycc huatjog, marr cniurr derr id vaiw anne quer kir ar. "jitmaw liw diyhh jinjniar zinrjinx." guaw qencii .lyc .kir, jit diamxjingx au derr snax vaiw tauu hinn qycc laii, guaw iauxx m hongwkir, qycc quer jit diamxjingx, juewau guaw qamxqag guaw ngiaa ar. Hionghiongg guaw ee jonghongw viw quiw qywqyec jingg kacc hyw, sursit-siong, marr byy jaiww huatsingx .quer. Ui' hitt zit kiw, dagg zit gauw longxx zinrjinx Lading bunhuad/ qitnax qauwkysux. Quiw lexvair au, guaw dngw kir haghau, vne byy qycc huatjog .quer, simrjiww dirr haghau marr qangrkuanw, soxu vniwquiw-vniwquair qetsog ar! Dyrr si jitt sii, guaw bingvik sniaw si jingsinn qnualingjingr (Neurosis).

Dauc dauc huesiongw jiaxee itcer, jnuaxngiu sanxsingx, cingcyw knuar diyc jingxqyy byy qongcaiw ee qiogbin si guaw jurqiw jit ciuw anvaii ee. Gauw jurlaii byy jinjniar duiww hitt xee sakdyw guaw ee dongyc siurkir, guan'inx dirr jiax. Guaw jaix , ix si virr saixlong ee, qui' xee surqnia laii jurr guaw luersimx naxx okmoo ee amwdok. Guaw jaix ixau byy qycc huatsingx jitt jiongw dairjir ar! Guaw duiww jurqiw qamxqag hunwno/ qenwsiaur. Guaw jaix, dirr jurqiw ee simx-diongx, hiwlang jurqiw, berdangr quair vadd langg, gauw si hitt xee qaix virr jxiur ee vuanrdoo! Ui' hitt sii kiw, guaw berdangr qycc zimxsiu verbuw iusimx/ dongjingg ee kauxkir duiww guaw qongxue.

Jingsinn quanlingjingr qycc jniajyr guaw jit xee viwbit/ qenwsiauwdai ee viwbit/ jit xee sitvai, kiokk dirr guaw srinx-siong kanx cud jit jiongw u iwgi ee jipid/ byy langg u ee minua, kaisiw venr qaxx jin' hu jikzim/ jinjniar damx kiw jikzim/ uirr jurqiw e singjiu/ cuttauu. Dagg zit tauwjaw junxsii go diamw kixcngg/ u sii snax diamw dyrr kiw laii, itdit tak qaur cid diamw, jiacc kir haghau.

Dirr huihiamw siqii inxcua guaw qniaa zip belo :ee, si guaw zed'air qodok/ qac'ir jikbok. Dirr guaw knuar .laii, dairjurzenn ciongbuanw liauw cutqii, beh qniaa .zip jurzenn ee kaxqii nirr. Muixx jit der jiyhtauu/ miuxx jit jangg cauxbok/ muixx jit hxang mic, naxjunxx longxx uac lingwlingr/ jerje qibiau. Jimwdimm dirr jurzenn-diongx, hyxcincniu vee zip dirr jurzenn ee qinqud nirr, tuatli jingxqyy zinlui sewqair.

Dairiog qang siqanx, guaw iauxx u jit dnxua diongriaur ee qinglik. Dirr beh kir haghau ee lo-diongx, jit bak sud qamxqag jurqiw duxx ui' qau qau ee hunn nirr tamr tauu cud laii, inwsiong huisiongg cimx, guaw sui' bingvik itcer : jitmaw guaw si guaw jurqiw ar! Cniurr jit dow bongbu-ciuu dirr guaw aurpiah, hitt dow cniuu au iauxx byy jit xee "guaw", dirr hitt xee sikig, guaw duw diyc guaw jurqiw, dirr jex ixjingg, guaw marr junjai, jixsirr itcer huatsingx dirr guaw srinx-siong, jitmaw si guaw huatsingx dirr guaw srinx-siong. Guaw jaix, guaw jitmaw si guaw jurqiw/ jitmaw guaw junjai. Dirr jex ixjingg, guaw si an' vadd langg ee iwjir jyr jex/ hex; jitmaw gauw si jiauww guaw ee iwjir kir jyr jex/ hex. Dirr guaw knuar .laii, jit xee ginggiam sinx qycc diongriaur : guaw srinx-siong ee "kuanuix". Qongw laii qiquair, dirr jitt dnxua qiqanx/ hin'gong/ jingsinn quanlingjingr huatjog ee hitt quiw qywguec, guaw songwsid duiww vnuawlauu viwbit ee itcer qiwdii, narr byy, guaw dirr hitt sii, dyrr u kyxlingg iwsig .diyc, guaw ee kuanuiqamw/ hitt xee viwbit dirr guaw srinx-siong qig kiw ee qewdadqamw ji' qranx ee luirsursingr. Sidjer jinghingg m si anne, envid ap-aw ee itcer qiwig ixqingx siaubyy ar.

Iokk jitt sii, guaw sriu iaucniaw, ham' gunw daux ee ving'iuw jywhuew kir dorqar, ving'iuw dirr Lucerne oo-vnix u jit dongr cur. Hro guaw hnuahiw ee si, cur dirr oo-vnix/ jit qingx junkor/ jit jiah junn. Juxlangg suibongw giamle qingxqyr gunw bersaih bongxjong, iuguann unxjunw guaw ham' inx qniaw suxiong jitt jiah junn. Vuthing :ee, gauw berhiauw qyr junn, kia lecc qyr. Gunw daux marr u jit jiah vnetauu/vnedew junn, gunw bad dirr hiax cir itcer sniu e diyc ee cuttauu. Incuw guaw jyr ee derr id hxang, dyrr si kia dirr junbuew, qyr junn jinwzip oo nirr, juxlangg vunn vi'aw qiyr gunw dngw laii, jin' pnaiw me gunw jit tingg, henxzenn guaw ee dongrjog hro ix jin' dua ee jiaujy vut'anx. Ho'ngg me, guaw jin' sitjir, kiokk marr diyhh singzin jurqiw huan cyr, ix ee qawsi si driyc :ee, dongsii, marr jin' hunwno, jitt xee vuii/ m bad zri ee jngkalangg qingwzenn qnaw buxziok guaw, jitt xee "guaw" m na ixqingx duarhanr/ si jit xee diongriaur/ u derui/ u jungiamm ee langg --- jit xee lau langg --- jit xee diyhh virr jundiong/ qingwuir ee duiwsiong, qingwzenn u langg qnaw duiww ix duarser sniax. Mrqycc ham' henrsit sna' duiwjiaur, dirr huatqongg-diongx, hionghiongg u damrvyc diuduu, jit xee bunrdee puu cud laii "m quanw jnuaxngiu, liw dauwdew si si'angw? Liw ee huanxingr hyxcincniu suecbingg, qandna' qxuiw jiacc jaix liw zuarr diongriaur! Pen' pen' liw bingg jaix ix si uanjuann jingwkag, liw iauxx byy jap-zi huer, si jit xee hagsingx, langg ix si jyr vaxvah neh, jit xee u jnii/ u srer ee langg, u nng dongr cur/ quiw jiah hyw bew."

Jitt sii, guaw byy liauxqaiw, guaw sniu guaw sidjer-siong si nng xee byy qang ee langg, jit xee si hagsingx/ m bad dairsor/ duiww jurqiw uanjuann byy vaxag; lingrgua jit xee si diongriaur/ u kuanuix/ bersaih virr knuar byy qraur dang ee langg, cniurr jewjysiongx qangrkuanw u sewlik/ u ingxhiongxlat. Jitt xee "tnazinn" si sing'uac dirr jap-veh sewqiw ee lau langg, ix cing u liuw-aw ee ree/ dir vehsig qew taumox/ sraiw jit daii kinven lixiuu bexciax.

Jitt xee liamrtauu laijurr ixjingg jit xee quaiwqii ee texgiam. Gunw druar dirr Klein-Huningen sii, u jit zit, jit daii ligsig qoxlyw ee bexciax ui' ox ciurnaa sraiw quer gunw daux, hitt daii bexciax cniurr didjiap ui' jap-veh sewqiw sraiw .quer .laii. Guaw knuar .diyc ee sii, huisiongg qikdong " is ix! Byy m driyc, ix laijurr guaw ee sidai." guaw naxjunxx zinrcud, ham' guaw dirr guaw jurgnow-diongx sraiw hitt daii, si qang jit hxingg. Zenau, qycc u jit jiongw hro guaw e tror ee qamxqag rig .kiw .laii, naxjunxx u langg taux guaw sniaw mic/ kyxlingg si guaw virr penr --- virr guaw tniawair ee quewkir soxx kipenr. Jitt daii bexciax si ixjaw ee jit qnia bunbut! Guaw byy hxuad biyue si sniaxmic huatsingx dirr guaw srinx-siong/ jiacc qionglet qamxziamw guaw ee si sniaw? Jit jiongw ngwbang? Jit jiongw huailiam? Qamxx si jit jiongw singzin? ix itdit qongw be suah " driyc, dyrr si jitt xee ngiu! Driyc, dyrr si jitt xee ngiu!"

Qycc u lingrgua jit vaiw dngw kir jap-veh sewqiw ee texgiam. Dirr guaw jit xee a'ii daux, bad qnir .quer jit xee jap-veh sewqiw ee ser diausiong, hex si jit qnia qoxlyw angtoo cohuii, nng xee caixsig zinbut qowsingg, qidiongx jit xui si Stuckelberger isux, jap-veh sewqiw buew Basel jit xui bingzinn; lingrgua jit xee langhingg si ix ee jabow vnerlangg : kreh bak/ crunx jic. Tniax qongw u jit zit, Stuckeberger lau isux qniaa quer Rhine qiyy, hutzenn hitt xui ho'ngg tyxiar ee venrlangg cuthen dirr ix ee binrjingg, pauruanr ser ser liam be tingg, lau isux jin' akjag qongw "si lar! si lar! Liw itding dyhh byy songxkuair/ jic crunx .cud .laii/ bagjiux kreh .kiw .laii." vnerlangg jiauww huanhur jyr, lau isux sui' taux jauw kuix, vnerlangg itdit kreh bak/ crunx jic kia dirr hiax, dag'ee tniax liauw ciyr be suah! Ser diausiong ee lau isux cing u liuw-aw ee ree, qiquar ee si, guaw qra hitt siangx ree zinrjyr si guaw jurqiw :ee, gauw kaksinr, jex si guaw jaxjingg cing quer ee. Jitt xee sinwliam hro guaw qikdong, qiongbecc huatqongg. " oox! Jex itding si guaw ee ree!" iuguann qamxqag ree cing dirr guaw ee kax, kiokk qongw be cud jex quaiwgii ee qamxqag ui' dyhh laii. Guaw byy hxuad lixqaiw jitt jiongw ham' jap-veh sewqiw ee itdiwsingr (Identity). Dirr hiaxee zidjiw, ciangjai qra 1886 nii siaxjyr 1786 nii, dagg vaiw narr cuthen jitt jiongw jinghongw, jit jiongw bogbingg-qibiau ee huailiam rig .quer .laii, apdyw guaw.

Dirr junn-dingw jokget/ virr me au, guaw kaisiw sniu jiaxee horsiong byy kanlenn ee inwsiong, inx qethap jyr jit vxag jin' cingcyw ee uerbin : guaw dongsii sing'uac dirr nng xee sidai/ si nng xee byy qang ee langg, qamxqag gignaiw/ dimdang, juewau guaw sitbang qaxx iwsig .diyc, bylun zyhyy, henrjai ee guaw, jixvutqyr si jit xee siyxhagsingx, qaix ho'ngg huat/ hing'uii diyhh ham' nihuer bardah. Lingrgua hitt xee langg itding luanrlaii, jerjiyw ham' vurbuw/ cinjniaa hiax tniax diyc a'qongx jerje qowsu u quanhe, a'qongx cutsir dirr 1795 nii, ding'ii si jap-qauw sewqiw, dirr guaw cutsir jingg, jaw dyrr quewsinx ar, guaw byy kyxlingg ham' ix qang. Ingqaix qongw, dongsii jiaxee sniurhuad longxx si bongbu/ bohoo/ huanxngiaw ee hingsid cuthen. Guaw qir be cringx dongsii guaw si m si jaix tuangenn-diongx guaw ham' J.W.Goethe (1749-1832) ee cinjniaa quanhe. Guaw sniu qongxx dongsii guaw m jaix, guaw si ui' cnehunrlangg hiax dirr id vaiw tniax diyc jitt xee qowsu. Voxciongx jit qxur, jit xee ho'ngg tyxiar ee tuangenn, qongw guaw a'qongx si Goethe ee susingjuw.

QIONGLIK HAM' GUAW EE SUSIONGW QAUSIAP

Qang jit dxangx jit xee bixle ee zuac .langg, diongdaur qniaa cud haurhngg, laii qaur dua qauwdngg qongxdniuu. Nasig ee tnix, cimx/ qau/ qycc tauwbingg, zidqngx camwlan! qauwdngg cur-dingw sinx pox ee hui'axjngx dywhuanxjiyr zidtauu qngngiaw qimqngx siamxsih. Kuthok dirr jiacc suiw ee qingxdir, "sewqair jiacc suiw! qauwdngg bixle! siongrder congwjy jex itcer, Ix jre dirr siongrr quann ee dingxbin, jit xee ngqimx vyxjy-dingw i.-iauuanw-u. nraa tnix ee hitt vingg ..." simqnuadew anne qongw, guaw ee simjniaa u jit xee dua cutkauw, jit jiongw trad diauu ee qamxqag cimx quer laii, qamxqag baa .kir, "mair qycc sniu ar! Moxjiongw qnialangg ee mic beh laii .ar, moxjiongw guaw byy guanrir sniu :ee/ m qnaw uaxqin ee mic. Uirsniaxmic m neh? Guaw e huan diyc siongrr kyxpnar ee juerget! Sniaxmic si kyxpnar ee jue? Qamxx si mosad? M driyc, m si jitt jiongw su. Siongrr qnialangg ee jue si huanxduir singwlingg ee juerquar/ vutkyw kuanliongg ee juerget. Si'angw huan diyc jitt jiongw jue dyrr sriu tnix ee kenxjig, ingxsingx ingxser lyc dergak. Guaw si verbuw tniawsiyh ee dogsingjuw, narr is mia-diongx juwdnia jysiu ingxsingx ee cuxhuat, anne inx itding e jin' siongsimx, uirr diyc verbuw guaw bersaih anne jyr. Guaw ui'id rair jyr ee si mair qycc ovec sniu."

Jitt xee dyrliw guaw liauxqaiw, beh jyr jin' lann! Ui' haghau qniaa dngw laii ee lo-diongx, naxx qniaa naxx sniu, susiongw jongxsi itjairr huee dngw kir guaw soxx qac'ir bixle ee dua qauwdngg/ jre dirr vyxje-dingw ee siongrder --- guaw naxjunxx virr qionglet ee den den .diyc, susiongw vuex kir vadd soxjai. Guaw vutduan qra qaqi qongw " mair sniu! Mair qycc sniu ar!" dngw laii qaur cur, langg jin' tiamw/ sen, maxmah mng qongw "u sniaw m driyc hno? Haghau nirr huatsingx sniaw su?" beh hro ix ansimx, guaw sit ue sit qongw, "byy dairjir". Simlai sniu qongxx, guaw narr jiong' hosux-luanrsniu ee jinjniar guan'inx qra maxmah qongw, kyxlingg duiww guaw kacc hyw. Mrqycc anne jyr, guaw diyhh jyr quaw knuar .kiw .laii cniurr jyr be qaur :ee : qra simliw soxx sniu :ee juann qongw cud laii. Maxmah siongsinr guaw qongw :ee, m jaix guaw ixqingx dirr huihiamw nirr, huan diyc berdangr kuansiar ee jue, jraix zip dergak ar. Guaw hongwkir tauwlo jiax ee liamrtauu, jinrliong qra jurqiw ee hingziah amr .kiw .laii.

Hitt amr, dyw bincngg-dingw vingw laii vingw kir, kunr be zip binn. guaw m jaix zuhyy jiacc mair kir sniu ee susiongw, iwdoo ciongx cud laii, juanlik vniawmia qra dongr dngw kir/ aurlaii ee nng zit/ sidjai si jetbuaa/ maxmah itding zinruii guaw puawvne ar/ Gauw iauxx si qirjuat tanxvec qongw cud simlai soxx sniu :ee, guaw byy sniu beh hro verbuw siongsimx.

Qaur derr snax amr, jetbuaa venr qaxx gryy be quer, m jaix beh anxjnuaw jiacc hyw, dirr bincngg-dingw vingw laii vingw kir/ hyw vut'iong'i bii .kir/ byy zuarr quw qycc cniw .kiw .laii/ dua qauwdngg/ siongrder sui' jauw cud lai, qamxqag huanxkongwlik zuxx laii zuxx ziok, qniax qaxx qui' sinkux vniar cinwqnua/ jixhyw jre .kiw .laii/ qra kunwsinn qnuaw jauw. "jitt xee dairjir sinx qycc giamsiog! Guaw itding rair sniu, itding diyhh sniu cud dap'anr, guaw uirsniaxmic beh kir sniu guaw m bad ee dairjir? jin' kingxding jurqiw vingrr byy sniu beh sniu, mrqycc si'angw beh guaw sniu? Si si'angw qiongvig guaw kir sniu hiaxee guaw byy qamxqag/ byy sniu beh jaix ee dairjir neh? Jex simqniax ee iwguan laijurr dyhh? Guaw uirsniaxmic si uirr jex sriu jetbuaa ee hitt xee langg neh? Guaw hitt sii qandna' sniu beh ylyw jitt xee bixle sewqair ee jyrbudjiaw, uirr qamxqig Ix byy hxuad qoxsngr ee tenhur/ pinxdig, guaw uirsniaxmic diyh'air kir sniu hex hiacc lann siongxsiong/ okdog ee su neh? Guaw m bad okdok ee su iwbi sniaw? Guaw jinjniar m bad, in'ui guaw berdangr/ marr vutqaix suiven mairhiongr jitt xee sniurhuad, jex viauxsi guaw sui' dyrr rair borhiamw kir sniu ee huihiamw. Guaw byy jyr/ byy sniu jitt hxang su, ix dyrr cniurr okbang lag dirr gauw tauu-dingw. Anne ee dairjir qiuwqingr anxjnuaw laii :ee? suibongw byy jyr sniaw, jitt hxang su iauxx si huatsingx dirr guaw srinx-siong. Uirsniaxmic? M quanw jnuaxngiu, guaw m si jurqiw congwjy .cud .laii ee, guaw si jiauww siongrder congwjy guaw ee hongsid laii qaur jitt xee sewqair --- dyrr si qongw, guaw si an' gunw vurbuw ee ngiu laii ee. Qamxx qongw gunw verbuw dyrr si jitt jiongw mic? Mrqycc, jiacc okdok ee sniurhuad juadduir be huatsingx dirr gunw senrliongg verbuw srinx-siong."

Guaw huatqag jitt xee sniurhuad u qraur liqingx. Gauw sniu diyc guaw ee a'qongx/ a'maw, suibongw guaw qandna' ui' uersiong zinrbad inx, inx knuar .laii zinjuu/ qyquir, u qraur lat qra soxu kyxlingg quijue inx ee zimrhyy sniurhuad qnuaw jauw jiacc driyc. Guaw dirr simlai qra soxu byy siy' bad ee joxsenx singx sniu .quer jit vxenr, siongrbuew sniu .diyc Adam/ Eva, sui' dyrr u jin' kakding ee liamrtauu; Adam/ Eva si siongrr jaw ee zinlui, inx byy verbuw, si siongrder didjiap congwjy :ee, siongrder iuxir hro inx jniajyr inx hitt xee ngiu; inx byy hxuad suanwdik, qandna' erdangr jniajyr siongrder congwjy inx ee hitt xee ngiu. Inx vingrr m jaix inx u kyxlingg ham' jitmaw jitt xee ngiu byy qang, inx si uanbiw ee jyrbut, siongrder qandna' e congwjy uanbiw, mrqycc inx iuguann huan liauw guanjue, jyr liauw siongrder byy hibang inx jyr ee dairjir. Jex jnuaxngiu kyxlingg? Narr si siongrder byy rair hro inx jyr, inx si be jyr ee. Jitt qnia su qisit jin' cingcyw, juaa quaiw inx, juaa si siongrder congwjyr inx nng xee jingg dyrr singx congwjy ee, henxzenn si uirr hro juaa kir quaixpenr Adam/ Evn huanrjue. Juandix-juanlingg ee siongrder dairsingx anvaii hyw itcer, uirr beh hro zinlui kaiqijow berdangr byy huanrjue. Inx huan liauw guanjue, hex si siongrder ee vunxir.

Jid'err anne sniu, sui' ui' tongwkow jetbuaa-diongx qaixtuad .cud .laii, guaw jitmaw jaix, si siongrder vunxlangg qra guaw he zip jitt jiongw jingqingw. Kaisiw sii, guaw vingrr m jaix Ix si m si iuxir beh guaw huan juerqyr/ iacc si sianghuanw, guaw byy air qycc kir sniu uirr did diyc kexsi kir qidyw, in'ui m quanw guaw si m si hnuahiw, siongrder qra guaw ankngr dirr jitt xee qowding ee uirdir, qycc qra guaw danr kngr lehh, byy beh cab guaw. guaw zinruii, guaw diyhh cinsinx liauxqaiw Ix ee iwdoo, cue jit diauu qaqi ee lo. Jitt sii, qycc lingrgua jit xee bunrdee .cud .laii.

SIONGRDER VIG GUAW JYR M DRIYC EE DAIRJIR

"Siongrder beh :ee si sniaw? Si hingdong? Iauxx si byy hingdong? Guaw diyhh cue cud siongrder beh guaw jyr sniaw, sui' rair cue .cud .laii." dongzenn lor, guaw jaix, jiauww tuantongw dyrdig laii knuar, piacbenw hitt jiongw juerget, itding byy sniaw bunrdee, jex qaur dnaxx iauxx itdit decc jyr :ee, mrqyxx guaw jaix, berdangr qycc qewsiok lyc .kir .ar. Amwmee kunr be hyxser, jingsinn samwdam, huisiongg jiaujui, guaw narr byy anne sniu, dyrr si qra jurqiw sokvak qaur byy hxuad zimxsiu ee dervo, qycc anne lyc kir bersaih tihh, guaw itding rair bad siongrder ee iwjir/ Ix ee iwdoo, guaw byy sniu beh anne suacbyy .kir, kaksinr si Ix tecud jitt xee huihiamw bunrdee. Qiquair ee si, guaw byy sniu .quer, moquiw kyxlingg decc congwdi guaw! Hitt sii, moquiw dirr guaw ee jingsinn sewqair byy kiw jok'iong, qamxqag ham' siongrder sna' viw, qxuiw si byy linglik ee. Jurr guaw ui' bongbu jngr cud laii, vingrr iwsig .diyc jurqiw hitt kig kiw, siongrder dan'id/ uixdai/ ciauquer itvnualangg ee uigiamm, dyrr kaisiw qunxsec guaw ee siongxsiong. Cuxau, simdiongx qitnax gibun longxx byy .kir .ar, qandna' cunx siongrder vunxlangg ham' guaw jniar duiwbin jinwhingg quatding iwgi ee kyxgiam/ itcer longxx cuxquad guaw duiww Ix jingwkag lixqaiw. Benw huaigii guaw jiong' virr vig niurvo. Byy hibang huatsingx jitt jiongw dairjir, jurqiw kiokk byy bingvik, in'ui guaw ingxsingx linghunn ee jinxqiur juann ab dirr jitt dingxbin ar.

Siongrder jaix, m quanw guaw virr vig huan liauw vutkyw kuaniongg ee jue, guaw marr byy hxuad jicii lyc .kir, mrqyxx Ix dyrr si byy be laii dauwsnaqang. Ix juandix-juanlingg, vunxlaii erdangr jin' kinsangx vuexdiau gauw jin' pnaiw kongwjer ee ciongdong, mrqyxx Ix byy junxvi anne jyr, Ix si m si hibang guaw kir jyr uivue guaw qywzinn dyrdig pnuaduan ee su/ guaw soxx sinwgiongw ee jongqaur qauwdy/ simrjiww Ix dring lyc laii ee qaiwlut, beh kyxgiam guaw duiww Ix ee diongsingg?jex si jitt qnia dua dairjir, jit qnia rair jin juansingx kuiwlat ee su, in'ui guaw qniax ingxsingx lyc dergak. Siongrder si m si jaix, dng' guaw ee sinwliam/ lixsingr sixbongg/ dergak ee iulingg cuthen sii, qamxx iauxx e hogjiongg Ix ee iwjir? Jin' u kyxlingg jex dyrr si dap'anr! Mrqyxx jex iauxx si guaw jurqiw ee sniurhuad ziiw, kyxlingg si m driyc :ee, guaw m qnaw siongsinr jurqiw ee tuilun, qycc diyh'air jaiww ui' tauu qaur buew siongser sniu .jit .xe."

Guaw jaiww crur tetdew sniu jit vxenr, did diyc ee si qangrkuanw ee qetlun. "henxzenn, siongrder iauqiuu guaw tecud iongxkir. Zuqyw si anne, guaw marr tongquer kyxgiam, anne Ix dyrr e qra tenunx/ kexsi sur hro guaw."

Guaw kiw bingw tetdew qycc sniu jit vxenr, junxvi naxx beh kir dergak hro huew siyx lehh, hro jitt xee sniurhuad vuh .cud .laii, knuar diyc dua qauwdngg/ cimnaa bingqngx ee tnix/ siongrder jre dirr qimsig vyxjy-dingw, qyqyx-jairsiong, likuix huanrqanx jiokk hng, ui' vyxjy ee erbin, jit der jiokk dua der ee vunr lag .lyc .laii, lag dirr sinx siujingw .quer, siamxsih cur-dingw, qra longr qaxx cruir qeqee, dua qauwdngg siwjiuuii ee viah marr longxx vxangx kir.

Guanlaii si anne! Guaw qamw .diyc jit jiongw hiongdua/ qongw be cud ee dang dnar byy .kir. Lag dirr guaw taukag :ee m si kenxjig, si tenunx, qycc duer diyc tenunx laii :ee si, guaw qongw be cud/ jurlaii m bad texhue diyc ee qiglok/ qamxqig lrauu lyc bagsaiw! juansimx hogjiongg Ix hex berdangr dexkongr ee bingrling, siongrder duiww guaw henxsi Ix ee diwhui/ zinjuu. Guaw naxjunxx did .diyc jit jiongw kexsi, ixjingg byy bingvik ee jerje surhang, jitmaw venr qaxx huisiongg cingcyw. Jex si vaxvah byy bingvik ee dairjir, gauw sniu, ix texgiam be diyc siongrder ee iwjir, vaxvah qongw cud siongrr hyw ee lixiuu/ siongrr cimx ee simwliam laii huanxduir, jex si uirsniaxmic jurlaii byy texgiam diyc hex dirliauu itcer/ qra itcer venr qaxx erdangr lixqaiw tenunx ee qijig/ itdit qra "singwqingx" ee "jap qaiwling" knuar jyr hingdong jixlamm : vaxvah sinwgiongw siongrder, jixsirr ixx "singwqingx" jixsi/ qauwdy ee hongsid laii sinwgiongw, m jaix dirr siongrder ee "singwqingx"/ qauwdngg ixgua, iauxx u jit xui juandix-juanlingg / juriuu/ uac lingwlingr ee siongrder, Ix diauwhuanr langg hunhiongw Ix ee juriuu, qiongvig langg hongwkir jurqiw ee quandiamw/ kaksinr ee su, jit diamw aw dyrr byy vyxliuu jiphingg siongrder ee bingrling, kyxgiam langg ee iongxkir ee dongsii, siongrder huanxduir singqingr junsiuw jiongxjiongw tuantongw, bylun si zuarr sinsingr. In'ui juandix-juanlingg, Ix kyxlu .diyc, jinwhingg iongxkir kyxgiam sii, juadduir be jyrsingg siaog hiyrqyw. Jit xee langg narr jiphingg siongrder ee iwjir, dyrr erdangr hongwsimx, qniaa :ee si jingwkag ee lo.

Siongrder marr si ixx jitt jiongw hongsid laii congwjy Adam/ Eva, hro inx vutditvud sniu guanvunw byy guanrir sniu ee su. Ix anne jyr si uirr beh cingcyw, inx si m si hogjiongg. Ix qangrkuanw beh guaw jyr moxjiongw dairjir, jyr moxjiongw tuantongw jongqaur lixiuu itding rair qirjuat ee dairjir. Si guaw hogjiongg, jiacc hro guaw did .diyc tenunx, u jitt jiongw texgiam au, guaw dyrr jaix siongrder ee undenw si jnuaxngiu jit huesu. Jit xee langg diyhh uanjuann henwsinx siongrder, jiphingg Ix ee iwjir ixgua, qitnax :ee longxx si cuwiaur ee; narr m si anne, itcer dairjir longxx si gugong/ byy iwgi ee. Ui' hitt sii kiw, guaw texgiam diyc tenunx, jinjniar hu kiw jikzim. Siongrder jnuaxngiu qra Ix ee dua qauwdngg congr lacsab? Duiww guaw laii qongw, si jit jiongw simqniax ee sniurhuad. Suiau, guaw hnuaw hnuaw jaix, siongrder ersaih jniajyr moxjiongw kyxpnar ee mic. Guaw knuar .diyc jit xee imamr/ kiongxvor ee viwbit, jitt xee viwbit hro guaw itsingx dar diyc ohunn/ venr qaxx iubun.

Jitt xee texgiam, hro guaw qamxqag qyckacc jurvix. Gauw qamxqag jurqiw si jit xee moquiw/ kyxlingg si gong dix, qig byy jiangxjir. Mrqyxx guaw kaisiw tak "siniog", ixx moxjiongw buanxjiog ee simjingg tak diyc Huatlirsair (Pharisees)ham' suewburqnuax ee bunn, tak diyc byy diongxjir ee langg si siongrder suanxbinn ee bunzi. Jiaxee biyue hro guaw jidsiwlangg qir diauu diauu ee inwsiong; byy qongjniar ee quanxqex did diyc ylyw, sinwsimx dongriauu ee Vixdig kiokk virr uixtog tuanqaur ee dang zim.

Guaw ee jurviqamw zuxx cimx, siongrder ee tenunx dirr guaw knuar .laii zuxx pnaiw lixqaiw. Qongw vec, gauw jurlaii byy duiww jurqiw u sinwsimx. Maxmah u jit vaiw duiww guaw qongw " liw ithiongr si quaix ginxaw." guaw dyrr si byy bingvik jitt qxur si sniaw iwsur. Guaw, jit xee quaix ginxaw? Jin' simsig ee qongxhuad, guaw jongxsi zinruii jurqiw byy jiangxjir/ sux langg jin' tiamw.

Duiww siongrder/ dua qauwdngg ee texgiam au, guaw u liauw moxjiongw sriok guaw hex liauxvutkiw ee viwbit, jit vorhun u hingngiaw/ qycc bongx e .diyc kurtew ee mic --- cniurr guaw itdit qongw tnidingw lag lyc laii ee jiyhtauu, jitmaw kaksit u jit der lag dirr guaw lakde-aw hitt ngiu. Sidjer-siong, jex si hro langg qamxqag qenwsiaur ee texgiam. Gauw lag .zip .kir moxjiongw siaog/ okdok mic ee ciuw-lai/ dongsii qycc si jit jiongw ingiau. U sii beh qongw ee ciongdong/ m si qongw jitt jiongw texgiam, si amwsi, gauw srinx-siong u mow quaw quaiwqii ee mic/ mow quaw byy tniax .quer ee mic. Guaw jin' sniu beh jaix, si m si vadd langg marr u luirsu ee texgiam/ mrqyxx dirr vadd langg srinx-siong, kiokk byy huathen .quer. Guaw qamxqag, guaw did be diyc tiongxsing, qycc si siongrder ee suanxbinn; si virr jxiur :ee, qycc si sriu jiokhog :ee.

Guaw juadduir be qongkaix qongw : cniurr guaw ee texgiam/ bang diyc derha biy-lai singwkiwquanx/ guaw kig ee exlangg, sursit-siong, itdit qaur lak-jap-go huer, jiacc qongw cud iuxquanx bang qnir singwkiwquanx ee dairjir. Kyxlingg ham' kanciuw qongw quaw texgiam :ee, marr si lau ee sii ar. Duiww soxu jiaxee dairjir giamqeh qimwqir, si guaw sewhanr qewsingg laii :ee, dongzenn guaw marr juadduir be ham' ving'iuw qongw.

Guaw ee cingcunqii longxx qinqir viwbit laii lixqaiw, jyrsingg jit jiongw jin' pnaiw zimxsiu ee qodogqamw. Guaw dirr jiaxee nii jit dua singjiu si, guaw dexjer driau sniu beh ham' vadd langg dramm ee iuxquaiw. Guaw ham' sewqair ee quanhe si anwdnia ee; dnaxx iuguann ham' ixongw hitt ngiu, guaw si jit xee qodoglangg, guaw bad jit quaw dairjir, iauxx e amwsi vadd langg m bad/ simrjiww byy sniu beh jaix ee dairjir.

Maxmah ee qajok u lak xee bogsux, nng ee a'jig marr si bogsux. Jerje qihue tniax .diyc quanhe jongqaur ee duiwdamm/ sinhak tyxlun/ vowdy enxqangw. Dagg vaiw guaw hni-aw kia quann ~ juwsinn tniax sii, dyrr u anne ee qamxqag " driyc, driyc. Jex itcer longxx jin' hyw, mrqyxx guaw luersimx ee viwbit neh? Qamxx marr si tnix sur ee viwbit. Inw duiww jex jit diamw aw dyrr m jaix, m jaix siongrder vig guaw jyr m driyc ee dairjir/ vig guaw kir sniu suxx langg iamwhin ee su, hro guaw texgiam .diyc Ix ee unhui." qitnax ee langg soxx qongw :ee, itcer uanjuann byy qongw diyc gi/ qongw byy iauwlingw. Guaw sniu, "knuar tnix ee bin-siong, itding u langg qeqiamw bad jit diamw hnor! Mow soxjai itding e u jinliw." guaw dirr vaxvah ee dosusig, soxu ee sniux-aw/ cecqui, jongw cue .quer, jixiaur iuxquanx siongrder/ snax xui ittew (Trinity, jriw singwve/ singwjuw/ singwlingg)/ sinlingg/ iwsig ee ceh, dyrr qinw qinw itdit tak. Guaw itdit knuar/ tak byy tingg, jongw tak quer au, did diyc :ee jin' jiyw. Guaw sniu, "inx marr m bad" simrjiww dirr vaxvah ee "Lordikpair singwqingx (Luther Bible)" ciaucue, jin' vuthing, qandna' duiww Iokvig (Job) soxx jyr tuantongw qawsi qaixsueh dyrr hro guaw uiwcuir, mrqycc guaw iauxx si dirr ceh nirr cue diyc an'uir, digvet si derr qauw jniux snax-jap-zi siyxjed : m quanw guaw ing seh-juiw cingsew qaqi, ...... liw kiokk qra guaw hed zip nuarqaux-drew." (30/31 siyxjed)

Aurlaii, maxmah qra guaw qongw, dirr hiaxee zidjiw nirr, gauw ciangjai sertauu-sersinn. Dairjir m si anne, guaw si uirr viwbit ing simsinn. Jitt sii, guaw sniaw marr byy jyr, luersimx sniu be qaur ee simanx/ vingjing, viwbit hro guaw ui' itcer huaigii jnetuad .cud .laii, dagg vaiw sniu .diyc jurqiw si jiyhtauu, maudunw/ ciongdut dyrr tingjiw. "jiyhtauu si kaksit :ee, byy sniu qautongx ee ciongdong, cingx-vah nii quewkir, iuguann byy venr." guaw sniu, " guaw jixsirr jit jiongw e siausid ee henrsiong, voghuad cud qokk sid qokk ngiu ee jingqamw, ham' huew qangrkuanw, jin' qinw qngx kiw laii, sui' huax kir." guaw vutqyr si jurqiw qokk jiongw jingqamw ee jongxhyy, guaw srinx-siong hitt xee "tnazinn" kiokk byy sriu sihan, ingxuanw be huixbet ee jiyhtauu.

GUAW EE ID-HY/ ZI-HY ZINQEH

Hitt sii, vaxvah qongw ee itcer longxx inxkiw guaw jin' dua huaigii. Jid'err tniax ix vowdy quanhe siongrder unhui, dyrr sniu diyc guaw jurqiw ee texgiam. Ix qongw ee itcer tniax kiw laii cauwjok/ kangvag, cniurr qongw jit xee vnuawlo tniax .laii, lenrr jurqiw dyrr byy siongsinr ee qowsu. Guaw jin' sniu beh qra dauwsnaqang, mrqyxx cue byy vanrhuad, guaw qniax pnaixser/ m qnaw qongw guaw ee texgiam/ marr byy sniu beh cab ix ee dairjir. Jit bin guaw iauxx jiyw huer, lingrgua jit bin, qniax suxiong "derr zi zinqeh (Second Personality)" hro guaw ee kuanlik.

Jap-veh huer sii, guaw ham' vaxvah u jerje tyxlun qihue, amr amr aw hibang erdangr hro ix bad tenunx ee qijig, qiamxkinx ix liongsimx-siong ee tongwkow. Guaw siongsinr narr si ix jiphingg siongrder ee iwjir, hex si siongrr hyw ee. Mrqyxx gunw ee tyxlun jongxsi byy songxkuair qetsog. "ai! Ovec qongw, liw dyrr si air sniu, jit xee langg vutqaix sniu, si rair sinwgiongw." "M driyrc, jit xee langg diyhh texgiam jiacc e bad."gauw simlai anne sniu, cuir kiokk qongw " cniaw liwqra jitt jiongw sinwgiongw hro guaw or!" vaxvah tniax jitt jiongw ue, qingqah tec jit xe, bukyw-nairhyy dngw srinx likuix.

Guaw kaisiw qaux ving'iuw, jit quaw sunpog/ viwsur ee javox ginxaw. Guaw ee singjig jiamrr jingwsiongg, ixau quiw nii, simrjiww jauw qaxx jin' taujingg ar. Jit quaw singjig viw guaw kacc baiw ee dongyc jitdor guaw, byy vangr quer muixx jit vaiw qnuaw quer guaw ee qihue. Jex hro guaw byy songxkuair, guaw iamwhin qingrjingx, narr si cittyy sniu' qingrjingsingr, guaw e qirjuat camqax. Aurlaii, guaw ee singjig derr zi miaa, iwgua huathen jex viw derr id kuaiwlok je lor! Guaw byy air qingrjingx, haghau ee qongkyr suacc jniajyr jit qnia jin' tyxiar ee su. U quiw xui laursux duiww guaw qik u sinwsimx, qaur dnaxx iauxx jin' qamxsia, qir dirr simqnuadew. Ladinggiw laursux, dirr dairhak qar, si jit xee jin' kiauw ee langg. Duxhyw vaxvah dirr guaw lak huer sii qar .quer , guaw benw jre dirr qauwsig tniax kyr, si ciangjai kir dairhak ee dosuquanw ter laursux jiyh ceh, guaw jin' hnuahiw, jit tauu jraix .zip .kir cecduix, beh dngw laii ee lo-siong, jinrliong tuax kacc nguar .quaw.

Duardysor laursux ziuruii guaw gugong/ qycc qanquiw. Haghau jid'err u huatsingx dairjir, gauw dirr id xee virr huaigii; u langg uanqex, guaw dyrr si saixlongrjiaw. Sidjer-siong, guaw jixu virr qngxzip jit dniuu hunjingx, duxx hitt vaiw, guaw huathen jit quaw dongyc duiww guaw huaipy dig'ir, inx baihok dirr amwui dngx guaw, taux qongqig guaw. Jap-go huer, guaw ixqingx vutjiww quann/ qycc iongw, jin' iong'i virr qig, singx liac jit xee javox ginxaw, qra hnair qaxx linglongx sec, qitnax quiw xee marr hro guaw pah dyw dirr tokax. Laursux craa cringx au, guaw qandna' e qir .did jurqiw sriu moxjiongw jurzin byy qongjniar ee cuxhuat. Ui' hitt sii kiw, byy langg cab guaw, marr byy langg qnaw kihu .guaw.

Ham' langg duiwdik/ virr byy qongvnee jixjig, sidjai hro guaw iwgua, mrqyxx byy lann lixqaiw. Sriu diyc jixjig ee muixx jit hxang ciwqig liauw guaw, guaw pen' byy hxuad hiyxzin. Duiww jurqiw soxx bad :ee, sidjai taiww jiyw, kiokk qycc jiacc je maudunw; mng guaw jurqiw, guaw sidjai byy hxuad hiyxzin zimrhyy jixjig. Guaw u jit jiongw juerokqamw, vingrr iwsig .diyc jiongxjiongw quewsid, vauquad ixqingx/ iauxx bue huatsingx :ee. Guaw duiww langg' ee jikvi digvet binxqamw, jerjiyw qrongx diyc iauwhai, diamw diyc ziogdiamw. Suibongw guaw sidjer-siong vingrr byy jyr cud virr jixjig ee su, guaw iauxx si qamxqag, jurqiw si u kyxlingg kir jyr jitt jiongw dairjir ee. Simrjiww qycc let liauw jit dniux dnuax, siaw ha jiongxjiongw jiawue, laii hongjiw guaw qycc virr jixjig. Narr si guaw kaksit jyr liauw m driyc, e qamxqag kacc kinsangx, jiwjiyw, guaw jaix jurqiw uirsniaxmic qenwsiaur.

Jin' jurzenn, guaw kaisiw viauxhen laurvorjai, laii vow luersimx ee vut'anx, qongw hyw tniax, mair iong guaw ee iwjir qansiap, kuatsid jurdong e vow hyw jursinx; arr dyrr si qongw, guaw huathen jurqiw u juerqyr, kiokk qycc hibang jurqiw cingvec buqox. Guaw ithiongr jaix jurqiw si siangdingg singwqeh ee langg, qidiongx jit xee si verbuw ee qniaw : kir haghau/ tagceh zinrjinx/ byy qaiww kiauw/ juansimx/ viw vadd ee javox ginxaw jingxjee cingkir ; lingrgua jit xee si duarlangg/ laurlangg : dygii/ byy qaiww siongsinr langg/ likuix zinser, jiapqin dairjurzenn/ derqiuu/ guehniuu/ tnikir/ itcer singbut, digvet jiapqin amwmee/ kunwbang/ "siongrder" didjiap ingxhiongw ee qokk jiongw dairjir. Guaw qra siongrder he dirr inxhy lai, in'ui cniurr guaw/ dairjurzenn suibongw si siongrder soxx congwjy, vingrr ixx jex laii viauxdat siongrder jurqiw, kiokk virr Ix knuawjyr huisinsingr ee mic, kngr jit vnix. Guaw jurlaii byy zinruii jixu langg jiacc si "jiauww siongrder ee hingsiong (In The Image of God)", dirr guaw knuar .laii, quansnuax/ hyy oo/ huecauw ciurbak/ qokk jiongw dongrbut viw langg qyckacc erdangr texhen siongrder vunxjid, dendyww si langg, cing qokk jiongw qiquair kyxciyr ee snxax/ simdngg vi'piw/ air hihuax/ qexue snalensuar/ jursux-jurli qaxx ho'ngg iamwhin --- soxu jiaxee digsig, guaw vunxlangg jiurr guaw id-hy zinqeh (Personality No.1), iacc jiurr 1890 nii jit xee hagsingx knuar .laii, hex si jin' sigsai. Dirr ix ee sewqair ji' gua, iauxx junjai lingrgua jit xee ongqog --- cniurr jit jxy sinden, muixx jit xee zip .kir ee langg longxx virr qaixjy, dirr huanwqag-diongx qnir diyc jingwqyy uxdiu, sriu qamxdong! Janwtanr ! drat qaur be qir .did jurqiw ee junjai. Dirr jiax druar ee si "tnazinn", jaix siongrder si iamxsinx/ suzinn :ee/ dongsii qycc ciauquer suzinn ee viwbit. Dirr jiax, byy sniaxmic erdangr hro langg/ siongrder qecli, naxjunxx langg ee simlingg ham' siongrder dangjee ui' dingxbin knuar lyc laii tende banrbut.

Guaw jitmaw soxx qongw :ee, si guaw hitt sii m bad iwsig .diyc ee moxjiongw mic, guaw qycc ixx ngiaa quer itcer ee jit jiongw irqamw/ qionglet qamxjingg qamxqag .diyc ee. Jitt sii, guaw jaix guaw ham' jurqiw sna' suwpuer, gauw dyrr si jinjniar ee jurtew (True Self). Jixiaur qaqi jit xee langg , gauw dyrr e ban ban jinwzip jitt jiongw jongrtair. Guaw duiqiuu "lingrgua jit xee langg" --- zi-hy zinqeh (Personality No.2) ee lingjing/ qodok.

Id-hy/ zi-hy zinqeh ji' qranx ee jok'iong/ huanxjok'iong quanwcuanr guaw jingwqyy itsingx, mrqycc ham' itvnuax ihak soxui "hunlec ee zinqeh" byy quanhe; sianghuanw, ix dirr muixx xee qywtew-diongx jit diamw aw dyrr byy loriong. Dirr guaw itsingx, zi-hy zinqeh jin' diongriaur, guaw jongxsi ui' simqnuadew hiongr guaw qniaa laii ee itcer niu cud kangqanx. Ix si jit xee denxhingg ee zinbut, jixu qik jiyxsor langg jiacc knuar e diyc; dysowlangg soxx iwsig .diyc ee lixqaixlik vingrr byy qraur bingvec : ix qisit ham' inx byy nng ngiu.

QUATDING JURQIW EE MIARUN

Dauc dauc, qauwdngg venwjniaa jit xee tuabuaa ee soxjai, u langg qingwzenn dirr hiax dua sniax (guaw beh didjiab qongw, si butiw) jinwhingg iuxquanx siongrder/ Ix ee jixir/ hing'uii ee vowdy. Qauwdoo virr qingxqair qongw, inx qaix u quaw qamxjingg siongsinr anne ee viwbit : guaw jaix, jex si siongrr cimyr/ luersim siongrr cimdimm ee viwbit, kingxding bersaih iong zimrhyy zri siablau. Juewau guaw qandna' erdangr did cud qetlun --- byy langg e liauxqaiw/ bogsux marr byy cingcyw/ byy langg qnaw dirr jiongww langg binrjingg siablau siongrder ee sinvir, iong cauwjok/ iuciuu/ senwdong ee ue, setdok jiaxee byy hxuad tuangongw ee qamxjingg. Guaw marr siongsinr, iong jitt jiongw hongsid jiapqin siongrder si cywgo ee, qinggiam qar guaw, jitt jiongw unhui qandna' e sur hro jit diamw aw dyrr byy vyxliuu jiphingg siongrder iwjir ee langg ---jit diamw si ui' vywdy laii ee, qycc qaxsed, kexsi erdangr hro siongrder ee iwjir venr qaxx bingvik/ hyw liauxqaiw. Duiww guaw laii qongw, jex naxjunxx si siongrr hamhoo/ lann lixqaiw :ee, cniurr jit xee langg ee jikzim, dagg zit tamwtyw siongrder ee iwjir. Guaw byy anne jyr, kingxding ee si, itdanr cuthen vikced lixiuu, guaw dyrr kir jyr. Id-hy zinqeh jiamrr guaw sniu' je siqanx, hro guaw qamxqag, jongqaur qaiwlut duxx virr iong laii tewdai siongrder ee iwjir (jex sidjai suxx langg iwgua!) ui'id ee bogdig, si benw lixqaiw siongrder iwjir ee vit'iauwsingr. Guaw ee huaigii jit zit qiongg quer jit zit, vaxvah/ qitnax bogsux ee vowdyrsuu duiww guaw laii qongw, qyckacc hro guaw lann zimxsiu. Guaw jiuuii ee langg naxjunxx qra jiaxee bogbingg-qibiau/ giamdiong hamhoo uergiw, zinruii lixsow-dongzenn, inx byy qriuu lixqaiw, cinwcaiw qra jiaxee binghenw maudunw ee qongxhuad, cniurr: siongrder si banrlingg :ee/ dairsingx knuar diyc soxu zinlui ligsuw/ kaksit congwjyr zinlui/ qimwjiw zinlui huanrjue/ simrjiww ixx dergak ee huew, ingxser cuxhuat inx/ mrqycc zinlui iauxx qycc vutditvud huanrjue ji' lui ee ue.

Qiquair ee si, jin' dngg jit dnxua siqanx, moquiw dirr guaw ee simlai byy zimrhyy jok'iong/ moquiw vutqyr si jit jiah iong ticlen lren kiw laii ee qowmngg og qxauw. Jitt xee sewqair, druu liauw siongrder ixgua, si'angg marr byy zimrhyy jikzim, guaw jaix, siongrder si jin' kyxpnar ee. Dagg vaiw narr tniax diyc vaxvah vowdy sii qongw diyc "zinjuu ee" siongrder, ylyw siongrder air zinlui, krngr langg iong air huevyr siongrder sii, guaw vut'anx dyrr puu cud laii. "ix qamxx kaksit bad ix dngdecc qongw :ee?" guaw huaigii. "qamxx qongw ix e qra guaw --- ix ee qniaxzii --- cniurr Issac, tec kir henwjer? Ix qamxx e qra guaw qaux hro jit xee byy qongjniar ee huatdingg, hro guaw cniurr Iasox anne dingr dirr sibzirqer? Ix jyr be qaur. Dirr mow quaw jinghongw-ha, ix si byy hxuad jiphingg siongrder iwjir. Jit jiongw iwjir, dyrr cniurr "singwqingx"vunxsinx soxx viauxbingg ee, si qik kyxpnar ee." dairjir byy viw jex kacc cingcyw ar, dng' langg sriu koxkngr, singx hogjiongg siongrder/ m si sunrjiongg langg jitt lui ee ue, vutqyr si cinwcaiw qongw gongw ziiw. Jin' henxzenn, lanw jit diamw aw marr m bad siongrder ee iwjir, narr m si, lanw jnuaxngiu e qingwuir duiwtai jitt xee jiacc quanqenr bunrdee/ qandna' uirr qniax jitt xee u buhan uilik siongrder, dyrr jiauww Ix ee iwjir kir jyr/ siongrder erdangr qra Ix kyxpnar ee iwjir qiongg qax dirr qodnuax byy langg vangjan ee zinlui srinx-siong, cniurr Ix qiongg qax dirr guaw srinx-siong qangrkuanw. Dirr hiaxee qaxjongx jurqiw jaix siongrder iwjir ee langg, u si'angw singx knuar diyc Ix ixqingx hro guaw jyr liauw sniaw? "siniog" byy luirsu jitt hongbin ee su, "quriog -- Iokvig qir (JOB)" , kyxlingg u hro guaw dua hiauxgno ee bunzi, kyxsiyh hitt sii guaw byy sigsai. Hitt jun, guaw duxx jiapsiu qensinwlew, marr byy tniax quer jitt lui ee qauwdy, "qingwuir siongrder" virr zinruii si quewsii. "Iutaiwzinn" :ee, jaw dyrr uirr siongrder ee air/ zinjuu ee qidog hok'imx soxx cuxdai ar.

Guaw sewhanr jiongxjiongw texgiam ee siongrdingx/ sewbin hiongg qaiwqair ee ingwjiyr, hro guaw huisiongg sitjir. Guaw mng qaqi "'si'angw anne qongxue? Si'angw jiacc be qenwsiaur, jiacc qongzenn denxsi ix ee singwkiwquanx, qycc cai dirr biy? Si'angw hro guaw zinruii, siongrder iong jitt jiongw suxx langg tyxiar ee hongsid huixbet Ix ee qauwdngg? Qamxx si moquiw jyr ee hyxdai?" itding si siongrder iacc moquiw jiacc e anne qongw/ anne jyr, guaw siongsinr byy huaigii. Guaw qnaw kingxding, huatbingg jitt jiongw susiongw/ hingsiong :ee, juadduir m si guaw.

Jiaxee si guaw sing'uac-diongx siongrr diongriaur ee texgiam, hro guaw hionghiongg dua gno: guaw diyhh hu kiw jikzim, guaw ee miarun, uanjuann cuxquad dirr guaw jurqiw. Guaw diyhh cinjur cue diyc jitt xee bunrdee ee dap'anr. Mrqycc si'angw qra jitt xee bunrdee qax dirr guaw srinx-siong? Byy langg huedab guaw ee bunrdee. Guaw jaix, guaw rair ui' siongrr cimx ee jurgnow hiax cue diyc dap'anr/ jaix jurqiw qodok kia dirr siongrder binrjingg/ jaix siongrder qandna' e mng guaw jiaxee kyxpnar ee dairjir.

Jid'err kaisiw, guaw u jit jiongw miardiongx juwdnia ee qamxqag, naxjunxx guaw ee sniwmia si miarun hro guaw ee, guaw rair jiapsiu. Jex hro guaw qamxqag anjuann, m quanw guaw byy hxuad qra jurqiw jingwbingg/ ix kiokk hiongr guaw jingwbingg liauw ix jurqiw. guaw byy iongxiuw jitt jiongw kingxdingrsingr, Ix iongxiuw liauw guaw. Si'angw longxx duat be jaw guaw ee sinwliam: guaw virr qingxsuanw kir jyr siongrder beh guaw jyr ee dairjir, m si kir jyr guaw sniu beh jyr ee su, incuw guaw qnaw qniaa jurqiw zinruii driyc :ee. Guaw u jit jiongw qamxqag, dirr itcer kuriuw quatdingrsingr ee dairjir/ byy qycc jabcab dirr jiongwlangg-diongx/ si dandok ham' siongrder jywhuew. Dng' guaw srinx dirr "hiax", byy qycc qodnuax sii, guaw si dirr siqanx gua; guaw sriok dirr quixarr sewqiw, hitt sii jyr cud huedab ee Ix, si ithiongr junjai/ dirr guaw cutsir jingg ixqingx junjai ee Ix, ingxuanw junjai ee ix dyrr dirr hiax. Ham' "tnaxzinn" ee jiaxee damue si guaw siongrr cimkig ee texgiam; jit bin si hueccyx ee dauwjingx, lingrgua jit bin si byy tangx viw ee hixqongg.

Dongzenn, guaw byy hxuad ham' zimrhylangg dramm jiaxee dairjir. Duliauw maxmah ixgua, guaw m jaix iauxx u si'angw erdangr qautongx, ix naxjunxx marr cniurr guaw, u damrvyc luirsu ee sulo. Mrqycc guaw jin' qinw juwir .diyc, dirr qaudamm-diongx, ix m si guaw ee duiwciuw, ix duiww guaw ee taiwdo si jit jiongw himsen/ qingr, jex duiww guaw m si hyxdai. Anne guaw qra jiaxee susiongw he dirr jurqiw ee simlai. Qisit guaw qyckacc qac'ir anne, jurqiw jit langg cittyy/ zit-xia suisii jyr bang/ dirr ciurnaa-lai sanwvo/ iongxiuw sriok jurqiw viwbit sewqair.

Maxmah sinjaii quandua/ vuii vuii / jin' zinjuu/ jit jiongw laijurr luersimx dongrbudsingr ee unluanw/ jin' gauu juxjiac/ duiww langg iuxsen, jin' kongxqaux/ air qongw ciyr/ jimjiog tniax langg qongxue. Ix jurqiw marr air qongxue, jid'err qongw narr jnuajuiw quanwcuanr/ vutjiw u bunge tenhun/ kyxsiyh byy sikdongx huathuix, itdit kamr dirr tuantongw bixdig-ha, mrqyxx byiwdiong hionghiongg henwcud ix amwiwsig zinqeh : jit xee cimdimm/ binsiongr uigiamm ee zinbut/ iongxiuw uanbiw byy kiamwdiamw ee kuanuix/ jyr dairjir juadduir byy diuduu. Guaw kaksinr ix u nng jiongw singwqeh, jit xee si byy ok'ir/ jin' u zinsingr; derr zi si, sinvir kuixjar. Zi-hy zinqeh jixsirr duxdng henxhen, dagg vaiw dy' si hro langg iwgua/ qniax, jitt sii ix hyxcincniu duiww jurqiw qongxue, kiokk dagg qxur naxx jiamx decc cak, ongxongw qrongx diyc iauwhai, hro guaw vnir exqauw byy ue rinr.

Derr id vaiw huatsingx si dirr guaw lak huer sii. Gunw qecviah jin' u jnii, inx u snax xee ginxaw, duarhanr :ee nihuer ham' guaw beh uaw, lingrgua nng xee si jabow :ee. In laijurr sniaci, cingrcah hro guaw qamxqag qiquair kyxciyr, digvet si lexvaiwzit --- bingvaii pueee/ dingxbin snxax u vehsig qunxvnix/ qruar vehsig ciuxlog/ simrjiww buachunw/ taumox srex qaxx iuqngx. Inx qac'ir denw paiwtauu, itsimx sniu beh ham' guaw jitt xee snakor cing qaxx ziauu pewper/ ree puar quixarr kangx/ ciuw lacsab/ colow/ kutqiongg ee javox ginxaw li qaxx hng ~ ~. Maxmah anne qongw, "hex, liw knuar hiaxee suiw ginxaw, zuarr u qauwiongw/ u lexmau lehh! Knuar liw jurqiw ee hing'uii, cniurr jit xee gongrdaix." guaw qamxqag sriu buxziok, zimw be diauu, jauw kir qra hiongsiw pah, hro ix jiac jit dxngr covaw. Ix ee maxmah jin' siurkir, laii gunw daux naurcaw. Maxmah dua diyhqniax, naxx kaur naxx dua sniax me guaw jin' quw, qigdong qaxx guaw m bad duw .quer. Guaw itdit byy iwsig diyc huan liauw sniaw cyr, sianghuanw, qamxqag jin' hnuahiw, guaw qawsi jitt xui cnehunrlangg, dirr gunw jngtauu jyrsingg jiacc byy dauwdah ee kiwhunx. Mrqycc maxmah ee qigdong qra guaw hnawqniax .diyc, guaw duar diyc juerokqamw jauw kir qngwkimm aurbin ee dyh-aw vnix, sngw guaw ee jiyhtauu/ jxngx-aw. Jin' quw jit dnxua siqanx, cur-lai itpenr diamrjing. Maxmah cniurr vingsii anne, jre dirr uaw txangx ee iw-aw criah pongwsex, guaw tniax diyc ix ser sniax qra qaqi qongw, tniax e cud ix iauxx decc sniu jitt hxang su, vutqyr si lingrgua jit jiongw quandiamw. Hionghiongg, ix dua sniax qongw " dongzenn, jit xee langg si vutqaix snix hiacc dua dui qausixginxaw!" guaw sui' iwsig diyc ix si decc qongw hitt quiw xee guaw qa'ngg pah :ee. Maxmah siongrr tniawair ee hniadi air paclac, cri quixarr jiah qxauw, kacc qongw dyrr si qxauw-ue, jabjingw :ee/ sunjingw :ee/ qxauw-qniaw (qauxqniaw/ qauxaxqniaw) ji' lui ee ue. Guaw iwsig diyc ix marr zinruii jitt quiw xee ho'ngg tror ee ginxaw si baiw jxingw qauxqniaw, guaw benw quawir ix ee jikvi. Guaw jiacc lak huer, dyrr jaix m hyw qra iangkir viauxlo cud "liw ham' guaw sniu :ee qang!" guaw narr hen cud laii, ix kyxlingg e hunwkair huanxvog " liw jitt xee ho'ngg tyxiar ee ginxaw, liw jnuaxngiu qnaw qongw linw maxmah ee sniurhuad zuhyy!" ui' jitt hxang su, guaw did .diyc jit xee qetlun : guaw kacc jaw itding u qingquer luirsu ee texgiam, jixvutqyr guaw jitmaw be qir .did ziiw.

BIH SRINX BORAU EE BAGJIUX

E qongw jitt xee qowsu, si huaigii jongqaur zuxx laii zuxx cimx ee sii, huatsingx lingrgua jit qnia su, henxsi liauw maxmah ee siangdingg qywsingr. jit zit, gunw uii jre dyh-vnix, qongw diyc mow quaw janwbixsix kikdiau sniu' did'auu/ marr tee kiw siuding sijib ee kyxlingsingr. Qongw qaur jiax, maxmah nauh nauh liam dirr cuir-lai, "ar! Liw, guaw soxx air :ee siongrr air, liw, ho'ngg jiuwme jiwquann ji' hog." cniurr quewkir qang, guaw qaxjongx byy tniax .diyc, jinrliong qra simjniaa ab .lyc .laii, narr byy, guaw e hnuahiw qaxx dua sniax huah --- guaw ngiaa ar!

Maxmah nng jiongw zinqeh ji' qranx ee dua cavet, si guaw ginxaw sii, ciangjai e bang diyc ix jin' iusimx ee guan'inx. Zidsii, ix si jit xee kyxair ee maxmah, qaur amr, ix venr qaxx vutkyxsugi, cniurr irgenqax/ jit jiongw qiquair ee dongrbut. Kyxviw qongxx, himm-het nirr e luw-jewsix; qoxlyw/ bujingg, cniurr jinliw/ dairjurzenn hiacc bujingg. Dirr anne ee sikig, ix dyrr si guaw qongw ee "jurzenn simlingg" ee huawsinx.

Guaw marr u jitt jiongw qoxlyw ee tensingr, ham' guaw ee tenhu sna' kanlenn, suibongw m si longxx songxkuair :ee. Dng' guaw byy sniu beh singzin, jaingiaw mow hxang dairjir, kiokk qycc jin' cingcyw sidjer-siong si jnuaxngiu jit huesu sii, guaw e hnuahiw virr langg kipenr. Dirr jitt jiongw jinghongw-ha, guaw cniurr jit jiah qxauw --- liw ersaih penr ix, mrqycc juewau, ix jongw e pnri cud virr cangr ee mic. Jitt jiongw "dongrcalik (insight)", si vunxlingg/ si ham' tnazinn jinwhingg "sinvir hunhiongw (Participationg Mystigue)" ee qicow, cniurr jit jiongw byy langg cam'uw ee qamxingr hing'uii-diongx, u jit luiw "borau bagjiux (Eye of Background)" qimx qimx qra liw siongr.

Guaw itdit qaur aurlaii jiacc bingvik. Dongsii, u quaw jin' qiquair ee dairjir huatsingx dirr guaw srinx-siong, vixzuu, guaw e siongser qongw mow langg ee sing'uac, mrqyxx guaw m bad hitt xee langg. Dirr guaw kanciuw jit xee ving'iuw ee hunlew, sinniuu/ ix ee qadingg guaw uanjuann itbuu-soxdix. Dongsii, guaw jre dirr jit xee dionglenn sinsu duiwbin, ix lauu dngg dngg cuiwciux/ si jit xui ludsux. Gunw zedlet qongw diyc huanrjue simlixhak/ uirr beh huedab ix jit xee jin' juanbunn bunrdee/ guaw venx liauw qowsu suecbingg/ qycc draur qokk jiongw sewjed hro qowsu kacc uahpuad. Guaw naxx qongw naxx qamxqag hitt xui ludsux viauxjingg zuxx qyc'ngiu, qycc laii, qui' dyh ee langg longxx diam .kir. Guaw simjingg suacc jin' gairgiyc, jixhyw tingg .lyc .laii. Siartnix-siarde, dag'ee kaisiw jiac quejiw ar/ guaw kia .kiw .laii/ qniaa .zip .kir vngrdiamr ee hiyckunwsig/ cue jit xui vniqag jre .lyc .laii/ diamw jit qix sikqahunx (Cigar)/ qra duxx aw ee jingqingw ui' tauu sniu jit venr. Jitt sii, jre qang dyh jit xee langkeh qniaa uaw laii, jikvi ee binrsinn qongw " liw jnuaxngiu jiacc bongxjong?"

"Bongxjong?"

"Si ar! Liw qongw ee qowsu ar."

"Qowsu si guaw venx ee ar!"

Hro guaw qamxqag gongngiac/ kyxpnar :ee si, guaw qongw :ee qingwzenn si jre dirr guaw duiwbin hitt xee langg ee dairjir, sewjed jit diamw aw dy' byy jingcax. Dongsii, guaw huathen jurqiw lenrr jitt xee qowsu nirr ee jit qxur ue marr qir be kiw laii --- qaur jitmaw, itdit sniu be .kiw .laii. Dirr J.H.D.Zschokke (1771-1848) siaw ee "jurgnow kexsi" nirr, biyue luirsu ee jit qnia su: u jit vaiw, dirr jit xee ser luxdiamr nirr, ix qingwzenn dngbin criah jit xee byy siy' bad ee siauwlenlangg, qongw ix si cat, in'ui dirr ix simlai ee bagjiux, knuar diyc qa'ngg tautec ee juanvo quewdingg.

Guaw ee sing'uac ciangjai e huatsingx anne ee su: dudzenn jaix jit qnia guanvunw longxx m jaix ee dairjir. Jitt jiongw diwsig dyrr cniurr guaw jurqiw ee quanliam laii qaur taukag-lai. Maxmah marr e u jitt jiongw jinghingg, m jaix jurqiw decc qongw sniaw ; cniurr jiangxag diyc juadduir kuanuix ee jit xee sniax, jitt xee sniaimx soxx qongw :ee duxhyw ham' jingqingw sna' huhap.

Maxmah zinruii, guaw ee diwlik ciauquer guaw ee nihuer jerje, ix quanwsir cniurr duiwtai duarlangg hitt ngiu ham' guaw qongxue. Soxu byy guanrir ham' vaxvah qongw ee su/ ix dy' e qra guaw qongw/ ix jaw dy' qra guaw dongwjyr cinbit ving'iuw/ qra ix duw .diyc ee mahuann juanvo qongw hro guaw tniax. Dirr guaw iokk jap-id huer sii, ix tauwlo ham' vaxvah iuxquanx ee dairjir/ hro guaw jin' diyhqniax/ sniu kangx sniu pang, jiongbuew quatding, guaw diyhh ham' vaxvah ee mow xee ving'iuw camsiongg/ tniax qongw ix si jit xee jin' u ingxhiongxlat ee langg. Byy qra maxmah qongw jit sniax, jit zit ervox vangwyc au/ guaw jurqiw zip sniaa/ qaur hitt xee langg ee daux kir/ kuimngg ee jabow suxiongrlangg qongw ix cud mngg. Guaw sitbang/ qycc sitjir, jixhyw dngw .laii. Si siongrtenx beh ix byy dilehh. Byy zuarr quw, maxmah qycc tec kiw jitt jann su, ix qongw :ee kiokk si kacc unhyy ee jingqingw, jingxqyy dairjir dyrr hunn-sriaux-enx-snruar. Guaw vutjiw u qamxciog, simlai sniu "liw suacc siongsinr jitt qnia su, jin' si dua gongrdaix, liw gong qaxx siongsinr si jinjniar ee, cax jit sud aw jyrsingg jaieh." duiww hitt sii kiw, guaw dyrr quatding qywvet knuawtai maxmah qongw ee ue. Ingxhiongw diyc duiww ix ee sinwzim, cuxau, byy qycc qra simlai viwbit qongw hro ix jaix.

Aurlaii qycc huatsingx jitt jiongw jinghingg, dng' ix ee zi-hy zinqeh jngr cud laii, ix soxx qongw ee itcer dy' jin' jinsit, hro guaw simqniax. Narr si maxmah itdit anne, guaw itding erdangr u jit xee vutjiw qibiau ee qaudamjiaw.

Ham' vaxvah jywhuew dyrr dua byy qang lor! Vunxlaii jin' hnuahiw qra guaw dirr jongqaur duw .diyc ee mahuann tanxvec dingqiuu ix ee iwqenr, mrqyxx guaw byy anne jyr, guan'inx si, gauw jaw dyrr jaix ix hiaxee byy uivue vunxjid ee dab; jitt xee qaxsed byy quer zuarr quw dyrr did diyc jingwsit. Vaxvah cinjur qauwdy guaw qensinwlew, qra guaw huann siw. Jit zit, guaw suiven henx qauwgi bunrdab ceh, hibang cue diyc duliauw qamxsiongx/ lann lixqaiw/ quasyr bybi ixgua, duiww Iasox ee biysut. Guaw vingw diyc iuxquanx snax xui ittew hitt dnxua, qidiongx u quaw mic inxkiw guaw cuwbi : ittexsingr (Oneness) dongsii qycc si snax xui singr (Threeness). Jitt xee bunrdee qiac kiw guaw ee hingwtauu, in'ui hex si luerjai maudunw. Gauw jiokk qitai ham' vaxvah dramm jitt xee bunrdee, anne qongw, "lanw jitmaw henx qaur snax xui ittew ar, mrqyxx lanw qra tiaur .quer .kir hyw ar, in'ui guaw jurqiw duiww jex marr itbuu-soxdix." suibongw guaw qingwpuer vaxvah ee singsit, kiokk marr qamxqag jin' sitbang, guaw qra qaqi qongw, "bunrdee dyrr dirr ganxjingg ar, inx kiokk m jaix/ iauxx be genr sniu, guaw beh zuhyy damlun guaw ee viwbit?"

Guaw cir quiw xee guaw zinruii air drang taukag ee dongyc, liyc aw ciwtamr jit xe, mrqyxx qex liauxqangx. Guaw qiyr byy zimrhyy huehiongw, simrjiww kiw liauw huanxjok'iong : inx lingxbin/ kiamr zindig, hro guaw ham' inx qyckacc souanw.

SIONGRDER QECLI GUAW HAM' SINWGIONGW

Suibongw jin' iawsen, jinrliong mair kir lixqaiw, qycc siongsinr (jitt jiongw taiwdo vutjiw hap maxmah uirkauw), junxvi camqax singwcamlew, py diyc juewau ee hibang. Guaw qamxqag, jex jixsirr jit jiongw qiwliamrsingr jurcanx, duiww jruw Iasox jiunii qiwliam uahdang ziiw. Iasox si dirr ... 1890-30=1860, 1860 nii jingg quewsinx ee, lauu quaw amwsi lyc laii, cniurr "tec kiw laii jiac, jex dyrr si guaw ee singkux." iwsur si qongw, lanw jiac singwcanx pangw sii, qaix qamxqag jiac ee si ix ee tew, qisit si ix ee bah; qangrkuanw, lanw limx putyjiuw guanlaii si ix ee hueh. Jex jin' binghenw ar, tauwquer jitt jiongw hongsid, lanw qra ix ionghap, jinwzip lanw singkux. Dirr guaw knuar .laii, jex sidjai u qraur hyw ciyr, guaw kingxding, dirr jitt xee hing'uii vuerau, itding junjai moxjiongw viwbit, guaw hnuahiw dirr niaw singwcanx ee quewdingg-diongx cam'uw jitt xee viwbit. Qycc qongw, vaxvah duiww singwcanx ee vingqer naxjunxx qik quann.

Qinqir sewsiok, qauwhue uixguanhue ee jit xee uixguann, jniajyr guaw ee qauwhu, ix si jit xee iuxsen/ diamrjing ue byy je ee laurlangg/ jit xee ciacngg saihu/ guaw ciangjai kia dirr ix qangjoksig knuar ix iong ciacngg ham' voxtauu cutdiyh qikiauw. Henrsii, ix cing duarix/ dir quann by, binrsinn giamsiog cua guaw qaur qauwdngg, vaxvah ixqingx cing guaw jin' sigsai ee qauwpauu, kia dirr jewdnuaa aurbin, liam lexvair gisid ee qidyxbunn. Jewdnuaa-dingw pox vehsig dycqinx, quixarr xee dua pxed-aw, he buanw jit ser pnir jit ser pnir ee pangw. Guaw knuar e cud laii, si gunw hitt xui jywpangw saihu jyr :ee, ix hangx ee pangw vehjniaw bybi. Jiuw ui' jit xee vehsiah juixoo dyw zip kir vehsiah aux-aw. Vaxvah jiac jit pnir pangw, limx jit cuir juiw, qra aux-aw tec hro qidiongx jit xee laurlangg. Soxu ee langg kia tringg tringg, simsinn giamsiog, guaw kiokk qamxqag byy iwsur, jin' diyhqib knuar, kiokk knuar be cud/ iyh be diyc, dirr jitt quiw xee laurlangg srinx-siong e cuthen sniaw byy vingsiongg ee dairjir. Hitt sii ee kiwhunx cniurr qauwdngg qixhingg qitnax gisid (sexlew/ jongwgisid) qang. Guaw ee inwsiong si, jitt sii/ jitt de soxx vran ee gisid si tuantongw/ jingwkag ee. Vaxvah jixsirr jiauww quiding, ui' tauu qaur buew jiphingg gisid/ ix qaqiongg gixkir qongw jit quaw sikhap ee ue, qangrkuanw si gisid quiqiw ee jit vorhun. Byy langg qongw Iasox quewsinx qaur dnaxx ixqingx jit-cingx veh-vah lak-jap nii. Qitnax qiwliamrsingr jongqaur gisid, Iasox quewsinx ee zidqii kiokk si diongrdiamw. Guaw knuar be cud u sniaw siongsimx/ knuiwuac ee soxjai, ixqingx kyxliongg qiwliam Iasox ee diongriauwsingr, duiww zimrhyy jit hongbin laii qongw, jitt crur singwcanx iuguann sanwhiongx bybi, ham' sewsiok ee enwhue qyckacc be vixping tihh.

Tudzenn, lunn qaur guaw ar, guaw qra pangw jiac lyc kir, cniurr guaw soxx liaursiongw ee, vehjniaw bybi, juiw neh? Guaw damx jit xe, jniaw qycc sngx, henxzenn m si siongrdingw jitde. Qycc laii si juewau ee qidyw, gisid qetsog au, langg jit xee duer jit xee qniaa cud laii, byy siaudimm/ byy kuaiwlok, "or! Dyrr si anne" ee binrsig.

Guaw ham' vaxvah jywhuew qniaa dngw kir, simlai iwsig diyc guaw dir jit dingw osig sinx monii by, cing jit niaw osig sinx lexhok, jitt niaw ixqingx venwjyr guaw ee duarix ar, qadngg ee ziamwbar, tuixtauu huncex ser ser nng xee naxx sxit, diong'ngx si jit xee lakde-aw ee kuikauw, gauw ersaih dirr dre-cuir he jit diauu ciuxqinx --- jit xee dirr guaw knuar .laii ixqingx duarhanr/ lamjuw kiwkair jabjiog ee viauxdingx. Guaw qamxqag jurqiw siarhue derui did diyc tesingx, jex iwbi diyc ixqingx virr jiaplap jinwzip lamsingr siarqaukuanx ar. Hitt zit si lexvaiwzit, amwdngr marr viw vingsii kacc honghur. Guaw suibongw ersaih qui' zit cing sinsnax siwqer sec, simlai kiokk qamxqag kangx kangx, m jaix u sniaw qamxqag.

Quiw zit au, guaw jiamrr bingvik, sniaxmic longxx byy huatsingx. Guaw ixqingx qniaa qaur jongqaur buexliux, vunxlaii hibang e huatsingx sniaw (sniaxmic dairjir guaw m jaix lor!), qetqyw sniaw dyrr byy huatsingx. Guaw jaix, siongrder ersaih uirr guaw kexsi cniurr dua huew/ ciaujurzenn ji' qngx ee dairjir; mrqycc jitt vaiw ee gisid qnir byy siongrder jit sxix aw hingziah --- jiwjiyw duiww guaw laii qongw si anne. Dongzenn, kauxtauu-siong qongw diyc ziiw. Duiww qitnax langg hiax, guaw knuar be cud u sniaw buhan ee juadbang/ ab be lyc laii ee hnuahiw/ dairliong tenunx ee sniuxsur ... dringw, guaw zinruii siongrder vunxjid ee guansor. Siongser quancad, knuar byy "luersimx qauliuu" "qethap, ham' ... jniajyr ittew" ee henrsiong hunziah. Ham' si'angw neh? Iasox ? Ix vutqyr si jit xee dirr jit-cingx veh-vah lak-jap nii jingg siw .kir ee langg ziiw! Uirsniaxmic jit xee langg rair ham' ix qethap jyr ittew neh? Langg qongw ix si "siongrder ee qniaw (Son of God)", anne ix jixsirr vnuawsinn, ham' Hellene sinue ee inghiongg byy sniaw nng ngiu, qiwzenn anne, jit xee poxtonglangg jnuaxngiu erdangr ham' ix qed jyr ittew? Jex dyrr si "qidokqaur", ix pen' pen' ham' guaw soxx texgiam .diyc ee siongrder byy quanhe. Lingrgua jit bin, jin' cingcyw, Iasox jitt xee langg ham' siongrder u quanhe; ix bad dirr Gethsemane ham' sibzirqer-dingw qamxqag juadbang/ ithiongr qauwdy langg, siongrder si juair ee vaxvah. Hitt sii, ix itding marr knuar diyc siongrder ee kyxpnar. Jiaxee guaw longxx erdangr lixqaiw, mrqyxx iong vehjniaw bybi ee pangw/ sngx putyjiuw jinwhingg jitt lui kyxor ee qiwliamrsingr lexvair, bogdig qycc si sniaw? ban ban guaw jiacc bingvik, jitt jiongw qauliuu duiww guaw laii qongw, jinjniar si huixbedsingr ee texgiam, kangvag/ tetdew sitvai. Guaw jaix, byy qycjaiww camqax jitt jiongw gisid ar. "jex qinvunw m si jongqaur, jiax byy siongrder; qauwdngg si guaw vutqaix kir ee soxjai, hiax byy sniwmia, jixu sixbongg." guaw anne sniu.

Duiww vaxvah sanxsingx jit jiongw qnuaw be jauw qionglet ee linbinw. Hionghiongg guaw bingvik ix ee jitqiap/ sing'uac ee vi'qiok. Ix hunwdaur ee duiwsiong si jurqiw byy hxuad singzin ee sixbongg. Ix ham' guaw ji' qranx cuthen ? jit xee hiongdua ee qirlii naxx kiarviah/ keqog ji' qranx ee cimx, knuar byy kixjy qautongx qiyniuu ee kyxlingsingr, jitt xee qirlii taiww dua lehh. Guaw cinair/ kongxkair ee vaxvah dirr jerje dairjir-siong hro guaw jurjuw, jurlaii byy qiongvig guaw hogjiongg ix; jitt huee, guaw bersaih qra ix sag .zip .kir juadbang/ setdok singwjue nirr! Guaw diyhh singx texgiam diyc siongrtenx ee ingqngx. Jixu siongrder jiacc erdangr anne jyr/ guaw byy kuanli/ hex si byy zindy ee. Guaw qamxqag, siongrder si byy zindy ee/ jex si Ix uixdai soxjai/ itcer sewsiok ee dairjir longxx honggai be diyc Ix/ Ix zinjuu/ kyxpnar/ nng xee dongsii junjai/ jex si jitt jiongw qik dua ee huihiamw/ muixx jit xee langg uirr jingxqiur jurqiw/ jurzenn juanlik siamxpiah. Langg jixsirr dnuax hongbin iluann Ix ee air/ zinjuu, in'ui qniahniaa, inx jiong' jniajyr iuxquaixjiaw/ huixbedjiaw ee hisingpinw. Iasox juwir .diyc ar, jiacc qawsi lanw "jruw ar, jixinw gunw, hro gunw byy sriu iuxbee!"

Guaw ham' soxx bad ee qauwhue/ ham' zinlui sewqair qethap jyr ittew ee qamxqag, tetdew pah cruir .kir. Jiurr guaw knuar .laii, guaw ixqingx duw diyc itsingx siongrr dua ee sitvai. Guaw soxx setsiongw/ qowsingg guaw ham' jitt xee sewqair ui'id u iwgi ee kanlenn ee jongqauwquanx qaixtew ar; guaw byy kyxlingg qycc hiangxsiu sinwgiongw ee hixlok, dendyww qamxqag jurqiw qngw zip moxjiongw vutkyw viauxdat ee dairjir nirr/ qngw zip guaw viwbit-diongx/ guaw byy hxuad ham' zimrhyy langg hunhiongw. Jex si jin' qniasimx ee, siongrr camw/ qerlo/ kyxciyr ee si, moquiw giyhciyr guaw.

Guaw kaisiw hamrzip cimsux: jit xee langg qaix jnuaxngiu knuawtai siongrder? Quanhe siongrder/ dua qauwdngg ee sniurhuad m si guaw huatbingg ee, guaw snax huer soxx jyr ee hitt xee bang dyrr si anne ar. Jit xee viw guaw iwjir qyckacc qiongdua ee iwjir qra jitt nng xee qiongqax dirr guaw ee tauu-dingw. Qaix hro jurzenn laii singdam jitt xee jikzim? Vutqyr si jyrbudjuw ee iwjir ziiw. Qra jex quijue hro moquiw marr byy loriong, ix si siongrder ee jyrbut ziiw. Jixu siongrder jiacc si sidjai ee --- Ix siauduu dergak huew/ qongw be cingcyw ee tenunx.

Qongw diyc singwcanx gisid sitvai duiww guaw sanxsingx liauw sniaw ingxhiongw? Si gauw qywzinn ee sitvai? Guaw zinrjinx junxvi, hibang did diyc tenunx/dunwgno texgiam, mrqycc sniaw dy' byy huatsingx, siongrder byy jairdniuu. Siongrder ee enqor, guaw tutzenn huathen jurqiw ham' qauwhue qecjuat ar, ham' vaxvah/ qitnax zimrhyy sinwgiongw juadlii ar. Jixiaur inx soxu ee langg iuguann dairviauw qidokqaur, guaw ingxuanw si guarlangg. Jitt jiongw texgno hro guaw siongsimx, dirr guaw beh kir tak dairhak hiaxee niguec nirr, ziakamr jit renn imngiaw.

DUIWW SIONGRDER JIONGXJIONGW GIGNAIW

Guaw kaisiw qra juwiwlik juanxhiongr vaxvah siujongg iuxhan ee dosusig (hitt sii, jitt xee dosusig naxjunxx hro guaw jin' cimx ee inwsiong), dirr hiax ciaucue erdangr qauwdy guaw iuxquanx siongrder diwsig ee ceh. Kaisiw sii, qandna' cue diyc jit quaw tuantongw quanliam ee ceh, hex m si guaw beh air ee, juewau, guaw byir-diongx cue diyc Biedermann siaw ee "qidokqaur qauwgi" 1896 nii cutvanw. Biedermann henxzenn u jurqiw ee doglip sukyw, ceh nirr tecud qywzinn quandiamw. Guaw ui' ceh nirr bingvik jongqaur si "jit jiongw sinlingg ee hing'uii/ junjai dirr langg/ siongrder ji' qranx qenwlip ee quanhe-diongx". Guaw byy dong'ir jitt xee knuawhuad/ zinruii jongqaur si siongrder jok'ing dirr guaw srinx-siong moxjiongw mic/ si jit jiongw siongrder ee hing'uii/ guaw qandna' u kuthok ee hxun/ Ix si qiongjiaw. Guaw ee "jongqaur" byy singzin zimrhylangg ham' siongrder ee quanhe, u si'angw erdangr ham' siongrder hitt ngiu/ langg jaix jin' jiyw ee mic, erdangr sanxsingx sniaw quanhe neh? Guaw diyh'air qyckacc liauxqaiw siongrder, jiacc erdangr ham' Ix qenwlip quanhe. Dirr "siongrder ee singwjid (The Nature of God)" jitt jniux, guaw huathen, siongrder viauxsi jurqiw kuriuw "erdangr jiauww luirsu langg ee jurgnow (Ego) laii lixqaiw ee zinqeh: vauhamm jingxqyy uxdiu/ dogid-buzi/ uanjuann ciauuat huandinn ee jurgnow".

Jiurr guaw soxx jaix, jitt xee dingrgi naxjunxx huhap "singwqingx" soxx qongw. Siongrder kuriuw jit jiongw zinqeh, Ix si uxdiu ee jurgnow, cniurr guaw jurqiw si guaw ee simlingg/ bactew ee jurgnow qang. Dirr jiax, guaw kiokk duw diyc jit xee jongwgai, zinqeh iwbi diyc qywsingr/ qywsingr m si liongxtauu qnaa ee; dyrr si qongw, vauhamm dig'iuw ee siogsingr. Siongrder narr si itcer, jnuaxngiu e kuriuw erdangr hunven ee qywsingr? Lingrgua jit bin, narr si Ix kaksit u qywsingr, Ix qandna' si jit xee juxquanx, iuxhan sewqair ee jurgnow. Cuxgua, Ix u dycc jiongw qywsingr/ zinqeh? Itcer longxx cuxquad dirr jex, duhuix u langg jaix jitt xee dap'anr, narr byy, dyrr byy hxuad ham' siongrder qenwlip quanhe.

Guaw simlai sanxsingx qionglet ee dexjewqamw, dexjer guaw ee jurgnow ixx luirsu tuisag hongsid laii siongxsiong siongrder, jex dirr guaw knuar .laii sniu' cangwciux, zuqyw jex iauxx byy sngr tetdew setdok . Guaw ee jurgnow dirr zimrhyy jinghongw-ha, longxx jin' lann jiangxag, kuriuw nng xee horsiong maudunw binrhiongr, id-hy/ zi-hy zinqeh, dirr jitt nng xee ji' qranx, guaw ee jurgnow qik iuxhan, siurjer dirr jurgnow kipenr jurqiw/ cywgo/ simjniaa/ qamxjingg/ ciongdong/ juerget ee qokk jiongw kyxlingg, duw .diyc ee sitvai ciauquer singwli jerje, ix iuwdir/ air hihuax/ jursux-jurli/ knuar langg' be kiw/ amtamx/ iauqiuu vadd langg air/ byy qongjniar/ binxqamw/ vindnua/ byy hurjig ... dringw. Hro guaw dua sitbang ee si, ix kiamr bixdig/ jaihuaa, si guaw siongrr himsen/ jitdor vadd langg srinx-siong u ee. Incuw, jex jnuaxngiu kyxlingg ham' lanw setsiongw ee siongrder vunjid iuxsow luirsu neh?

Guaw zedlet jauxcue siongrder qitnax digdingx, qetqyw huathen inx ham' guaw ui' qensinwlew did .diyc ee qauwdy qingwzenn jiacc sigsai. Derr jit-vah cid-jap-zi diauu "siongrder ciauuat sewsiok siongrr didjiab ee viauxdat si : 1) hiyxding :ee, byy langg knuar e diyc Ix... ; 2) kingxding :ee, Ix druar dirr tnidingw ..." jex qamxx m si jit dniuu jaieh!! guaw taukag-drew sui' sanxsingx siongrder didjiab/ qanwjiab (tauwquer moquiw) qiongg qax qaur guaw iwjir setdok ee siongxsiong.

Derr jit-vah veh-jap-snax diauu qongw "siongduir dyrdig sewqair laii qongw, siongrder ciauuat sewsiogsingr" dirr Ix ee "qongjniar bysux", jitt jiongw vutjiw si "qongjniar" iauxx "viauxdat liauw Ix sinsingr junjai". Guaw vunxlaii hibang, jitt dnxua erdangr dramm diyc duar hro guaw jerje mahuann ee siongrder imamwbin : Ix ee vywhok/ hunwno/ duiww hiaxee jyrbut berdangr lixqaiw ee hing'uii; Ix ee juandix-juanlingg/ itding jaix hiaxee jyrbut jiongxjiongw kiamwkueh/ kiokk hnuahiw inw inx dac zip penlo/ kyxgiam inx, bingjaix kyxgiam ee qetqyw! Siongrder ee qywsingr si sniaw? U jitt jiongw hing'uii ee langg qaix jnuaxngiu qongw neh? Guaw m qnaw qewsiok duiziog jitt xee bunrdee. Zenau, guaw qycc tak .diyc, m quanw siongrder "vunxsinx ixqingx jurjiog, druu vunxsinx ixgua, itbuu-soxqiuu", mrqyxx Ix iauxx si " buanxir jurqiw" congwjy liauw jitt xee sewqair, " kia dirr jurzenqair, Ix ciongsit jurqiw ee zinjuu; kia dirr dyrdikqair, Ix hibang ciongsit jurqiw ee air".

Guaw duiww lanqaiw ee "buanxir (Satisfaction)" jaiww snax sukyw, duiww sniaxmic/ si'angw buanxir neh? Henxzenn si duiww jitt xee sewqair, Ix knuar diyc jurqiw ee qangjog, zinruii jin' hyw. Jitt diamw guaw ingxuanw be lixqaiw. Byy m driyc, sewqair si bixle ee, marr jin' kiongxvor. Dirr jit xee siyw jngtauu, zinkauw jin' jiyw, marr byy huatsingx zuarr je dairjir, viw diyc vadd soxjai, langg duiww "nilau/ vnertniar/ sixbongg" u qyckacc cimkig ee texgiam. Guaw iauxx bue buanw jap-lak huer, ixqingx knuar diyc jerje langg/ sniwmia ee henrsit, dirr qauwhue/ haghau-lai, marr tniax u qraur je quanhe sewqair ee koxlan/ huxvai. Siongrder qandna' duiww tendongg qamxqag buanxir, uirr liauw mair hro tendongg ee ingiau/ hixlok sniu' quw, Ix qra dogjuaa --- dyrr si moquiw vangr .lyc .laii, Ix duiww jex marr qamxqag buanxir? Guaw jaix, Biedermann vingrr byy anne ee iwsur, jixsirr cosimx-dairir, ser ser liam byy tingg, lenrr jurqiw siaw ee huiwue marr byy caqag. Guaw soxx knuar .diyc :ee, qaxsed siongrder jongjiw decc congwjy jit xee ciongbuanw maudunw ee sewqair, jit jiongw jyrbut tunjiac lingrgua jit jiongw jyrbut ee sewqair/ iwbi diyc u snex dyrr u siw ee sniwmia sewqair, si u dyrliw ee, mrqyxx Ix dairkair be dirr langg/ vuejiauw jauxsiur vutqaix sriu ee kow/ zimrhyy jankog, qamxqag buanxir jiacc driyc. "qibiau ee hiabjaur (Wonderful Harmonies)"/ jurzenn huatjig, dirr guaw knuar .laii, qyckacc cniurr tauwquer kyxpnar ee lat laii jewhok jit uann hunwluan, jiauww jaw dyrr kakding quixdy unrjuanw ee "ingxuanw" cnesinn, dendyww qyckacc sxingg byy quixdy/ byy iwgi ee qokk jiongw cnejiyc/ iaucnex luanrvuex luanrjongg ee jit dua dxuix mic, byy langg jinjniar erdangr knaur diyc cnesiur, inx jixsirr jit quaw dohingg ziiw.

Qongw siongrder ixx zinjuu ciongsit jingxqyy jurzenqair, suibongw guaw byy liauxqaiw, marr byy huaigii, henxzenn jex si siongsinr/ vutjunw ixx lixsingr laii lun ee lingrgua jit xee quandiamw. Narr si siongrder jinjniar si jiwsen :ee, anne Ix soxx congwjy ee sewqair uirsniaxmic jiacc byy uanbiw/ huxvai/ kyxlenn cicamw? "henxzenn ix si sriu moquiw ee qamxziamw, virr danr zip kir hunwluan-diongx." guaw sniu. Mrqycc moquiw marr si siongrder ee jyrbut ji' id ar! Guaw jixhyw dairliong tak ham' moquiw iuxquanx ee ceh, jaiww crur ui' Biedermann ee ceh suncue dap'anr, uirsniaw zimxsiu kow/ byy uanbiw/ siaog neh? Cue byy dab.

Jex qamxx m si kir liauw liauw ar!? Jitt vunw jin' dang ee dua vunw ceh vutqyr si laijurr siongxsiong hosueh; kacc camw ee si, ix iauxx si jit xee penwqiok/ kyxlingg si gugong, ui'id ee bogdig jixsirr amkamr jinliw. Guaw qamxqag huanwbet/ simrjiww hunwkair, qycc jit crur ter vaxvah qankow, ix ixqingx jniajyr jitt jiongw siaqaur ee hisingpinw.

JIAXEE DETHAGQAX DAUWDEW SI JNUAXNGIU NEH?

Dyrr si anne, dirr mow jit xee soxjai/ sikig, itding marr u cniurr guaw qangrkuanw suncue jinliw ee langg, inx lixsingr ee sukyw/ byy hibang jurkix kizinn/ qirjuat jiapsiu jitt xee henrsit sewqair suxx langg siongsimx ee jit quaw knuawhuad. Iokk jitt sihau, maxmah (ix ee zi-hy zinqeh)didjiab bingliauu qongw " liw rair cue siqanx knaur J.W.Goethe (1749-1832) siaw ee 'Faust' ! " guaw ui' cur-lai cue cud Goethe ee "Faust", cniurr jit qrow kaxqii pangbi imjimr zip guaw ee gnoxjong-lai, guaw sniu "jiongbuew u langg zinrjinx duiwtai moquiw, simrjiww dring lyc kyxpnar keciog. Uirr hro sewqair kacc uanbiw, quat'ir dnaxqig siongrder qewue-ha ee moquiw, ham' qxuiw dring keciog .". Mrqyxx Faust ee hing'uii hro guaw qamxqag auwnauw, ix vutqaix danhongbin/ hiacc qanxdanx diongwqer; qaix kacc kiauw/ kacc u dyrdig jiacc driyc. Hiacc iuwdir, qingwzenn jit sud aw dyrr byy quawir iong jurqiw linghunn he dur! Faust henxzenn u damrvyc kangcuir vorjic, guaw qamxqag juxiaur iwgi si okmoo (Mephistophieles, Dikqog tuansueh ee moquiw). Narr si Faust ee linghunn jinjniar jinwzip dergak, guaw marr be qankow, ix qaix did ee jue ! Guaw byy qac'ir qetbuew "moquiw sriu penr", okmoo jin' liauxvutkiw/ byy gamrbin, e hro kamw tensair penr? henxzenn byy hap logic. Dirr guaw knuar .laii, okmoo virr penr u lingrgua iwgi : ix byy did diyc langg' dap'ingr ee kuanli, Faust jitt vxuah byy sniaw qywsingr, narr hro penwqiok qewsiok jinwhingg qaur laiser, qaur hitt sii, ix ee iuwdir dyrr byy de bih ar. Guaw soxx lixqaiw ee, Faust puer be kiw uixdai/ sinvir ee inxcua, gauw kacc sniu beh hro ix cir .jit .xe, lenrgak-huew siyx ee jubi. Jinjniar bunrdee cud dirr okmoo, ix dirr guaw simx-diongx lauu lyc siongrr cimkig inwsiong : guaw hnuaw hnuaw qamxqag, ix iauxx ham' qokk jiongw vunxguann ee sinvir u kanlenn. M quanw jnuaxngiu, okmoo/ ceh qetbuew siongrder ee inxcua, duar hro guaw jit jiongw jiapqin iwsig sewqair qibiau/ sinvir ee texgiam.

Juewau, guaw huathen jurqiw bad (kyxlingg itdit si anne) knuar diyc siaog/ siaog vunxsinx buhan uilik, kacc diongriaur ee, hro langg ui' oamr/ koxlan qaixtuad. Ui' jitt hongbin laii knuar, Goethe jniajyr guaw simdiongx ee irgenjiaw. Mrqyxx guaw berdangr guanliong ix iong dansunn quixqer/ siyw penwsut/ dyrr qra Mephistopheles qnuaxjauw/ jex sniu' sinhak bi/ taiww lyxcyw/ byy hu jikzim; jin' uiham, Goethe qingwzenn jiacc byy jiangxjir, suxiong jitt jiongw qankiauw ciuxdnua, hro siaog venr qaxx buhai.

Tak jitt vunw ceh sii, guaw huathen Faust si jit xee detzinn, suibongw ix ginrlan dethak, henxzenn ix yc .diyc, dirr itding tingdo jiapsiu jinliw taiwdo. qaur dnaxx, guaw iauxx byy tniax quer iuxquanx dethak ee qongxhuad, jit xee sinx hibang vuh .cud .laii, kyxlingg e u itdit tamwsyh jiaxee bunrdee ee dethagqax, erdangr jiurr jiaxee bunrdee hro guaw kexsi.

Vaxvah ee dosusig byy dethagqax --- in'ui sukyw virr huaigii ee langg ---ee duwjog, jixhyw juanxhiongr Krug ee "dethak kyhak tongiong sudenw (General Dictionary of The Philosophical Sciences,1832 nii jaiww vanw)". Guaw jit tauu jraix zip kir ham' siongrder iuxquanx ee lueriongg. Hro guaw byy buanxir ee si, ixx "siongrder (God)" jitt xee suguann qaixsueh jyr kixtauu, qongxx si laijurr "vutkyw jingven" ee "sxen (good)", si "siongrr quann ee junjai" "uanbiw"/ siongrder ee junjai byy hxuad jingwbingg/ cutsir dyrr u ee quanliam. Anne, Dirr langg ee srinx-siong cutsir dyrr junjai, qamxx qongw cutsir jingg iauxx byy sidtew sii, dyrr u zimhyy amwcangr junjai? Dirr zimrhyy jit jiongw jinghongw nirr, lanw ee diwlik itding "dirr congwjy jiacc qysiongw/ uixdai ee quanliam jinwjingg, ixqingx u moxjiongw tingdo ee huatdenw".

Jitt jiongw qaixsueh sidjai hro guaw jin' diyhqniax qaxx qongw be cud ue. Jiaxee "dethagqax" si dyhh m driyc? Gauw sniu byy. Henxzenn, inx duiww siongrder ee liauxqaiw si tniax langg' qongw ziiw. Sinhagqax jitt hongbin kacc byy qang, inx jiwjiyw kaksinr siongrder junjai, m quanw inx soxx biysut :ee, horsiong maudunw jerje. Krug jitt xui sudenw venjib dirr viauxdat sii, he sniu' je qywzinn singqenr, jin' iong'i knuar cud ix ee pingduanr --- siongsinr siongrder ee junjai. uirhyy ix m didjiab qongw? Uirsniaxmic jrngx qew, naxjunxx ix kaksit zinruii, si lanw "sanxsingx" liauw siongrder ee quanliam, qycc diyh'air singx drat qaur mow jit xee huatdenw juixjunw, jiacc erdangr u "sanxsingx"? Jiurr guaw soxx jaix, dyrr si hiaxee ciacsinx-lortew/ dirr guansiw ciurnaa siwqer jauw, birkaihuar binjok marr u jitt jiongw quanliam, inx kingxding m si "detzinn", be jre .lyc .laii "sanxsingx siongrder ee quanliam". Guaw jurlaii byy sanxsingx iuxquanx siongrder ee quanliam. Dongzenn, siongrder si byy hxuad jingwbingg ee, vixzuu, jit jiah tangg laii qa snxax, suibongw ix qa ee si Australia ee ngiumoo, mrqycc zuhyy qra vadd jiah tangg jingwbingg Asustralia ee junjai? Siongrder ee junjai m si caixiong lanw ee jingwbingg. Anne guaw si zuhyy did diyc siongrder junjai ee qetlun? Langg' qra guaw qongw qokk sid qokk ngiu iuxquanx Ix xee dairjir, mrqyxx guaw sniaw marr byy sinr, byy jit hxang erdangr singsimx suechok .guaw. Guaw ee guanliam m si ui' hiaxee laii, sidjer-siong, qinvunw m si sniaw quanliam, ngua jit qxur ue, m si sukyw laii ee/ m si cniurr siongxsiong moxjiognw dairjir/ qingquer sukyw/ did diyc kakzin/ zenau siongsinr. Vixzuu, guaw ithiongr huaigii iuxquanx jxuw Iasox itcer/ m bad jinjniar siongsinr/ jex hro guaw ee inwsiong viw siongrder qyckacc cimkig/ siongrder ongxongw jixsirr hamhoo amwsi. Guaw uirhyy rair qra siongrder knuawjyr lixsow-dongzenn? Uirsniaxmic jiaxee dethagqax qongw siongrder si jit jiongw quanliam/ jit jiongw ersaih quwjair langg qaxsed? Sidjer-siong, siongrder ee junjai binghenw knuar e diyc, cniurr jit der jxngx-aw lag dirr liw ee tauu-dingw hiacc sidjai.

Guaw dudzenn bingvik, siongrder si siongrr kingxding/ siongrr didjiab ee texgiam ji' id, jiwjiyw duiww guaw laii qongw, gauw vingrr byy liapjy dua qauwdngg ho'ngg crangr moqngw ee hingsiong; sianghuanw, si ix qiongqax dirr guaw srinx-siong, guaw vutditvud ixx siongrr okdok ee hongsid laii sukyw, aurlaii hitt hxun did diyc tenunx byy hxuad viauxdat ee qamxqag dirr guaw ee srinx-siong cuthen, binrduir jiaxee dairjir, guaw qinvunw byy lat jipuer, ban ban did .cud anne ee qetlun: jiaxee dethagqax itding cud liauw sniaw movne/ qingwzenn zinruii siongrder si jit jiongw qaxding/ ersaih tyxlun ee qiquair knuawhuad. Hro guaw dua byy buanxir ee, iauxx u jiaxee dethagqax duiww siongrder kyxpnar hing'uii/ m na byy jurqiw knuawhuad/ qycc m jyr zimrhyy qaixsueh. guaw zinruii, jiaxee jiacc si dethagqax qaix digvet juwir/ kyxlu ee, in'ui qowsingg jit xee bunrdee, jit xee guaw zinruii sinhagqax marr jin' pnaiw qaixquat :ee. Hro guaw sitbang :ee, guaw huathen dethagqax simrjiww byy tniax langg' qongw quer siongrder kyxpnar ee hing'uii.

Guaw juanxhiongr lingrgua jit xee inxkiw guaw cuwbi ee debok, iuxquanx moquiw ee lueriongg : narr si lanw zinruii moquiw jit kaisiw dyrr si siaog ee, lanw dyrr e hamrzip horsiong maudunw ji' diongx, marr si qongw, lanw e lag zip kir nngrguanlun (Dualism) ee hamrjnew, lanw siongrr hyw qaxding moquiw virr congwjy sii, si senrliongg ee singbut, jixsirr qiaugno jiacc duirlyc. Cniurr Krug soxx jriw cud ee (guaw jin' hnuahiw jitt diamw virr jixbingg), jitt xee qaxset ixqingx qaxding iwdoo qaixsueh siaog dyrr si qiaugno. Qitnax ee jywbut, ix qewsiok qongw, siaog ee kixguann si " byy hxuad qaixsueh/ suecbingg :ee", ix naxx sinhagqax, vingrr byy beh zinrjinx sniu kacc cimx .quaw. Iuxquanx moquiw/ ham' vunxguann ee lueriongg, qangrkuanw berdangr kexsi lanw.

MIARUN HAM' GUAW QUNW SNGXCIYR

Jingg bunn soxx qongw .diyc ee si guaw jit herlet susiongw/ quanliam huatdenw venwhuar ee jongxqed, jitt xee jinghingg ensiok quixarr nii, qidiongx u jit dnxua kacc dngg ee siqanx dng .kir, jixsirr guaw zi-hy zinqeh lai huatsingx, giamqeh sriok suzinn. Guaw byy qingquer vaxvah ee unxjunw dyrr taux taux liriong ix ee dosusig laii genxqiur tamwsyh. U sii guaw id-hy zinqeh qongkaix tak Gerstacker (1816-1872) ee siyxsuad/ qitnax huanik jyr Dikbunn ee Ingbunn qingdenw siyxsuad. Jitt sii, marr kaisiw tak Dikqog bunhak, juxiaur si qingdenw jokpinw, haghau-lai qra jiaxee iong'i bad ee jokpinw qongxx si cnesiab pnaiw lixqaiw :ee, vutqyr byy sitkir guaw duiww jitt hongbin ee cuwbi. Gauw knuar ceh ee huanruii jin' kuah, byy sniaw bogdig, hiwqiok/ siquax/ ligsuw, simrjiww jurzenn kyhak. Tagceh m na u cuwbi, qycc si jit jiongw jin' hyw/ iuxli ee gulok, hro guaw viw langg kacc jaw jaix zi-hy zinqeh, qycc ui' qidiongx qaixtuad cud laii, in''ui zi-hy zinqeh iong'i hro guaw hamrzip viquanx siaudimm, dirr jongqaur bunrdee ee ongqog nirr, guaw ciangjai longr diyc viah, narr si hyxun, duw diyc jit xee mngg pah kuix, mngg au ee huewsig iuguann hro guaw sitbang. Vadd langg naxjunxx u uanjuann byy qang ee cuwbi, dirr guaw jurqiw py diyc kingxding ee dairjir, qandna' qamxqag uanjuann qolip. Guaw viw ixongw qyckacc sniu beh ham' langg qongxue, kiokk anxjnuaw sniu marr cue byy uerdee; dendyww dirr langg' ee srinx-siong caqag diyc moxjiongw solii/ byy sinwzim/ qniasimx-lunxmia/ jixhyw sniu beh qongw kiokk qra cuir hap kiw laii. Jitt jiongw jinghingg hro guaw cinwsimx, m jaix anxjnuaw kacc hyw. Uirhyy byy langg u ham' guaw qang ee texgiam neh? Guaw juadduir byy zinruii jurqiw si siauw :ee, in'ui siongrder ee qongbingg/ oamr longxx si erdangr lixqaiw ee sursit, suibongw hro guaw ee qamxjingg sriu apjer, iuguann si byy venr ee sursit.

Qamxqag jurqiw ee digvet/ virr vig jniajyr uihiabsingr, jex iwbi diyc qolip, guaw viw ixongw kacc iong'i jniajyr cutjue ee duiwsiong. Lingrgua haghau huatsingx jit hxang su, hro guaw qyckacc qodok. Guaw Dikbunn singjig ithiongr poxtongx, bunhuad/ jyrqur qyckacc byy cuwbi, jokbunn debak guaw knuar .laii, m si cenxvyc/ dyrr si gongrduh, guaw siaw ee jokbunn m si luan jnuar/ dyrr si hijingg qexir/ singjig dirr diongdingw qut laii qut kir/ anne dendyww kacc sikhap guaw/ byy air inw langg' juwbak. Dongjingg cutsinx sanwciah qadingg ee dongyc/ inx ham' guaw qang, diam diam byy cud miaa; gauw qac'ir byy qaiww kiauw ee dongyc/ kiokk duiww inx budix jin' byy songxkuair/ guan'inx si inx u moxjiongw guaw huisiongg qitai ee mic; inx jin' sunpog, knuar be cud guaw srinx-siong u sniaw byy qang ee soxjai, guaw ee "byy vingsiongg" jiamrr ho'ngg byy songxkuair/ vutjiw kyxpnar ee qamxqag; guaw itding u vaitig langg ee qywsingr, suibongw byy iwsig .diyc, kiokk hro laursux/ dongcy li guaw hng ~.

Dirr guaw viw langg qinw jit vo ee singwqeh nirr, huatsingx jit qnia dua dairjir. laursux cud jit xee jokbunn, jitt vaiw guaw duiww jitt xee debak jin' iwsinn, jingsingg vah vxue, iong juann jingsinn siaw, jurzin si singqongx ee jokpinw. Vunxlaii dyrr qitai jitt pnix jiwjiyw u qauw-jap hunx ixsiong (dongzenn m si jit-vah hunx, hex sniu' digvet), jiapqin jit-vah hunx.

Gunw hitt xui laursux jin' air qangxpingg hagsingx jokbunn, Ix singx pingg siongrr hyw :ee, si jit xee javox siaw :ee, suar lyc laii qitnax, guaw danw jurqiw ee miaa, mrqycc itdit byy qongw diyc guaw, "jex byy kyxlingg" guaw sniu, "guaw :ee suacc ham' hitt quiw pnix hiacc kyxlenn lueriongg :ee be vixping tihh? Jex si jnuaxngiu neh ?" qamxx qongw guaw sriu qolip, sniu beh iong jiacc kyxpnar ee hongsid laii inw langg juwbak?

Dng' soxu bunjniux longxx qongw .quer .ar, laursux tingg .jit .xe, qongw, " iauxx u jit pnix Jung siaw :ee, si siaw siongrr hyw :ee, ingwqaix hro jit-vah hunx. Kyxsiyh, jex m si ix siaw :ee. Jung, liw ui' dyhh caux laii :ee? Tanxvec qongw!" guarkauw cud zidtauu, guaw suacc hro luii kar .diyc, nacc e anne !

Guaw hionghiongg kia .kiw .laii, qniahniaa qycc siurkir, honghuew dyc/ dua sniax huah " guaw m si caux :ee, si iong jin' je simhueh siaw :ee."

laursux dua sniax ziangw " liw qongw vehcat! Liw juadduir siaw be cud anne ee jokbunn. Si'angw marr be siongsinr, hyw lar! Liw dauwdew ui' dyhh ciaux laii ee?"

jiuwjua qongw guaw si virr uanongw ee, byy loriong, laursux qencii ix ee knuawhuad, qycc hnaw guaw, "guaw qra liw qongw, narr si hro guaw craa .cud .laii liw si ui' dyhh caux .laii .ee, liw e ho'ngg kaiduu." dngw srinx likuix. Qui' vanx dongyc knuar guaw, inx ee ganxsinn hro guaw jin' dongr be diauu, guaw diyhqniax iwsig .diyc, inx naxx dirr simlai qongw " ha! Guanlaii si anne." guaw kongwgi, byy langg cab.

Guaw qamxqag, ui' jitmaw kiw, guaw virr ur hy, huanrjue ee viauhy, vunxlaii hro guaw vaixtuad ham' langg' byy qang ee soxu dyrlo, jitmaw longxx trad .siw .ar. Huisiongg cinwsimx/ qamxqag sriu buxziok, jiuwjua itding beh vywhok jitt xui laursux, jixiaur u qihue. Mrqycc guaw jnuaxngiu jingwsit bunjiux m si caux ee?

Snalensuar quixarr zit, jitt xee dairjir dirr simlai qunxqaw, qetlun longxx si "guaw byy vanrhuad", guduu/ bongbok ee miarun qapp guaw qunw sngxciyr, iong huew siyx jit xee inwqir --- vehcat/ penwjuw. Jitmaw, guaw bingvik jerje ixjingg berdangr lixqaiw ee su, vixzuu, vaxvah mng laursux, dirr haghau ee viauxhen sii, u jit xee laursux qongw " cavutdyx lar! Jin' zinrjinx." guanlaii inx itdit zinrding guaw gong/ qandna' puee puee aw bad .quaw narnia, jinjniar hro guaw hunwno si inx zinruii guaw penr langg', jex qamxx m si dyrdig-siong pnuar guaw sixhingg!

Guaw qamxqag jurqiw qiongbecc sitkir kongwjer. Zenau, huatsingx mow qnia su, (ixjingg guaw ixqingx juwir .diyc, dirr guaw srinx-siong u quer quixarr vaiw ar)" luersimx tudzenn venr qaxx jin' diamrjing, naxjunxx jit qingx jin' caxnau ee vangqingmngg virr qnuaix .kiw .laii, cincniu jit jiongw lingxbin/ hnowhenn ee simjniaa laii qaur guaw srinx-siong, mng guaw qaqi "dauwdew huatsingx sniaw su? hyw lar! Liw qikdong, dongzenn, hitt xee laursux hauwdaix, byy liauxqaiw liw ee vunxsingr, jiwjiyw byy cniurr liw liauxqaiw jurqiw hiacc je, ix ham' liw si berdangr sinwzim ee, liw byy sinwlai liw jurqiw/ qitnax ee langg, jex dyrr si liw ham' hiaxee tenjinx/ sunpok/ iong'i virr knuar taur ee langg kia dirr qang jit dinrsnuar ee guan'inx. Jit xee langg berdangr lixqaiw surbut sii, dyrr e qikdong."

Jiauww jiaxee byy pencuac/ byy dongrkir ee jixinw, guaw simlai rig kiw laii ham' hex jit herlet luirsu ee susiongw, dirr guaw byy guanrir kir sukyw hiaxee bersaih sukyw ee quanliam sii, kiokk kik'inr dirr guaw simqnuadew. Hitt sii, guaw iuguann knuar be cud id-hy/ zi-hy zinqeh ji' qranx u sniaw cavet, suibongw gauw iuguann zinrding zi-hy zinqeh ee sewqair si guaw qywzinn :ee, mrqycc jongxsi hro guaw qamxqag diyc duliauw guaw jurqiw ixgua, iauxx u moxjiongw mic, naxjunxx si itpenr tnicnix/ kuah bongg bongg byy venqair ee kongqanx josingg jit xee kuikuah ee sewqair kywqin guaw/ jit xee byhingg ee sinlingg (Spirit) jinwzip vangqingx --- jit xee siw kir jin' quw ee sinlingg, suibongw ixqingx quewsinx, kiokk byy sriu siqanx hanrjer, ingxuanw junjai, itdit qaur iauuanw ee birlaii. Jitt lui langg ee qetqiok ongxongw si inxcua-ligliong (Numen) ee qngkuann.

Dongzenn, hitt sii guaw byy kyxlingg ixx jitt jiongw hongsid laii viauxdat jurqiw, marr byy iwguan qra henrjai ee iwsig jongrtair qruix dirr dongsii byy junjai ee dairjir-siong. Jixsirr sniu beh viauxdat hitt sii soxu ee qamxqag, jiawjo jitmaw soxx lixqaiw :ee, laii suecbingg hitt sii/ hitt xee bongbu ee sewqair.

DIRR SIONGRDER EE SEWQIR

Dairjir quer liauw quiw qywguec au, dongyc qra guaw hy jit xee guarhy "Father Abraham". Id-hy zinqeh byy hxuad lixqaiw guan'inx, zinruii gongrduh/ hyxciyr. Sursit-siong, jitt xee guarhy dnaxqig diyc guaw ee iauwhai. Jex itcer amwsi duiww guaw laii qongw longxx si tongwkow ee, guaw knuar zuxx je, duiww sniaci sing'uac zuxx sigsai, duiww erbin beh qongw ee inwsiong marr zuxx qiongg: ban ban guaw jaix venrnarr si jinsit ee mic longxx sriok lingrgua jit lui surbut, qapp guaw duarhanr hitt xee sewqair ee qingxsiong byy qangg, byy qang jngkax/ kelauu/ ciurnaa, ixqibb jngtauu soxu ee langg/ dongrbut, inx hiangxsiu zidqngx/ hongx cuex/ huncaiw jauxjongg/ amwmee odar/ odar-ha huatsingx quaw dairjir/ m si derdoo-dingw ee jit xee soxjai/ si "siongrder ee sewqair (God's World)"/ itcer Ix soxx anvaii/ ciongbuanw viwbit ee soxjai. Henxzenn, langg vingrr byy liauxqaiw jitt diamw, simrjiww lenrr dongrbut marr moxjiongw tingdo sitkir diqag ee qamxsiu. Vixzuu, gubuw siongvix/ sitsinn ee binriongg, zimxsiu hinggik ee ganxsinn; Qxauw duiww juxlangg ee diongsimx/ ilai, simrjiww suanw cur/ cngkor jyr ix druar ee xui, vixqaur niaux liac niauxciw jursinr ee kavo, dy' binghenw knuar cud jitt diamw. Langg marr cniurr dongrbut qang ngiu, budix-buqag. Inx ngar tauu/ giac tauu knuar, dyrr si uirr siongr cud u sniaw tingwhyw liriong/ iong dirr sniaw bogdig/ ham' dongrbut qang singqunn druar/ singsiangx-singduir/ dauwjingx, mrqycc knuar be cud inx si qiawsinx dirr jit xee tongxid ee uxdiu, hiycsiu dirr siongrder ee sewqair, anhiyh dirr itcer ixqingx cutsir/ siw .kir ee ingxuanw nirr.

Dongrbut ham' langg si jiacc luirsu, cniurr lanw hitt ngiu vutdix-vutqag, guaw zed'air soxu zedhed dongrbut; guaw sniu inx u lanw ee linghunn, ham' inx dauwdin, lanw dyrr kuriuw jit jiongw vunxlingg ee lixqaixlik. Lanw juanvo texgiam quer qangrkuanw ee kuaiwlok visiongx/ air hin/ iaux cuiwdax/ qniahniaa sinwzim --- soxu jex itcer longxx si sniwmia ee vunxjid digdingx, byy qang :ee si gixgenn/ kacc qinxjiab ee iwsig/ kyhak. Guaw suibongw cniurr itvnualangg hiacc puewhok kyhak, knuar cud kyhak duiww "siongrder sewqair" ee souanw/ vuerli, dongrbut ingqaix byy jitt xee kiamwdiamw/ duirlyc jiacc driyc, inx tenjinx/ hyw cinqin/ sixdiongx/ ingxuanw diongsingg/ daddid sinwlai.

Narr beh giamqeh dingrgi, guaw zinruii tangtuax m si dongrbut, lingxhueh kajiacqud dongrbut si quewdo qaur kuntiongg vnuawlo-siong jit xee vutjiw qerdingw ee qaidnua. Jitt luirvet ee qokk jiongw jyrbut si teqiongx ho'ngg quadcad/ sojip ee mic (sit but), si dinquir budpinw/ ham' langg byy qang/ byy sriok zinlui :ee; inx si huizinlui sniwmia viauxhen hingsid, kacc jiapqin cauxbok(sidbut)/ m si zinlui.

"Siongrder ee sewqair" dirr derqiuu-siong ee viauxhen hingsid ui' cauxbok ongqog kaisiw jyr didjiap qautongx, naxx cniurr u langg ui' siongrder ee qingqah-dingw taux knuar, siongrder kiokk jurzin byy langg decc knuar Ix, kaisiw jyr cittymic/ qokk jiongw jngtna. Lingrgua jit bin, langg ham' giamqeh dingrgi-siong ee qokk jiongw dongrbut, longxx si siongrder srinx-siong ee jit siyw vorhun, jixvutqyr doglip cud laii ziiw, jex dyrr si uirhyy erdangr jairr inx hnuahiw siwqer jauxjongg, suanw druar dyhh ee guan'inx. Cauxbak juwdnia dirr guande, bylun soxjai hyxbaiw; inx m na viauxhen bixle / qycc u siongrder sewqair ee qaiwliam/ byy iwdoo/ byy pencax; digvet si ciurbok, dirr guaw knuar .laii, sinvir/ didjiap texhen sniwmia berdangr lixqaiw ee ham'ir. Si jitt xee guan'inx, guaw zinruii ciurnaa jiapqin siongrr cimx ham'ir ee soxjai/ qig kiw zinlui qingwuiwsimx ee soxjai.

Dng' guaw jiamrr sigsai Gothic hongqeh ee dua qauwdngg au, jitt jiongw inwsiong qyckacc qiongg. Danrsir dirr jiax, uxdiu byhanrsingr, u iwgi/ byy iwgi ee hunluan, huizinqeh bogdig/ qihaii huatjig ee jabjyy, longxx cangr dirr jiyhtauu-lai. Jex vauhamm/ qycc junjai dirr cimx qaxx byy der cig ee sinvir --- sinlingg (Spirit) ee texhen. Guaw hnuaw hnuaw qamxqag guaw ham' jiyhtauu bidced quanhe si dirr siw/ snex ji' qranx ee sinsingr.

Dirr hitt sii, kurtew/ u hertongw siongser suecbingg guaw ee qamxqag/ didqamw ixqingx ciaucud guaw ee linglik, inx juanvo ixx zi-hy zinqeh hingsid viauxhen, mrqycc guaw juxdong/ iongxiuw lingxgnorlat ee jurgnow kiokk itdit dirr virdong jongrtair, virr rngiuu zip dirr sriok cingx-vah nii hitt xee laurlangg huanrdiuu-diongx, guaw iong qiquair/ benw sukyw ee hongsid texgiam diyc ix/ qapp ix ee ingxhiongxlat ; dng' ix cuthen sii, id-hy zinqeh vyc qaxx naxx byy junjai, dng' jurgnow venr qaxx zuxx laii zuxx ham' id-hy zinqeh byy cavet, kia dirr jyxiu uirdir sii, hitt xee laurlangg (zuqyw byy virr be qir .did) qycc cniurr iauuanw/ byy jinsit ee bang ar.

Dirr guaw jap-lak huer qaur jap-qauw huer sii, hro guaw hamrzip kunwqingw ee bongbu ban ban snruar kuix, susiongw jongrtair marr u kacc hyw .quaw, byy hiacc ywlyc. Id-hy zinqeh zuxx laii zuxx cingbingg. Haghau/ doci sing'uac jiamr liauw jin' je siqanx, soxx did diyc kacc honghur ee diwsig, dauc dauc dor zip laii (ab .quer) didqag irqamw sewqair, kaisiw u hertongw tamwqiur jurqiw sniu beh air ee bunrdee. Tak quer jit vunw dethagsuw qanxlun, hro jurqiw duiww jitt hongbin u dairliyc qaiwliam. Hro guaw jin' buanxir ee si, guaw ee jerje didqag qingwzenn ham' ligsuw luirsu. Siongrr diongriaur ee si, guaw hro Pythagoras (iokk 580-500 b.c.)/ Heraclitus(540-480 bc.)/ Empedocles(490-430 b.c.)/ Plato(429-347 b.c.) ee susiongw kip diauu diauu, suibongw jiaxee lunrsut duar u Socratic ee lyxsyx. Inx ee susiongw jin' suiw/ u hagsut kuir, cniurr uerlongg ee rue, damrvyc iauuanw. Mrqyxx Meister Eckhart(1260-1328) ee duwjog, jiacc hro guaw qamxqag jit qrow uahlik, jex byy viauxsi guaw bad. Jiaxee qauwsiu hro guaw qamxqag lingw vingx vingx, St.Thomas hitt jiongw Aristotle(384-322 b.c.) sunn lixdir sid :ee viw suaboo qyckacc byy kuiwlat. Simlai sniu "inx itsimx sniu beh taur quer Logical henr cud moxjiongw mic/ inx vingrr byy kuanli dap'ingr/ marr byy jinjniar bad/ sniu beh jingwbingg jex si jit jiongw sinwgiongw, sidjer-siong, si jit jiongw texgiam." dirr guaw knuar .laii, inx cniurr tniax quer cnxiu, mrqyxx byy qnir .quer, iauxx jinrlik beh taur quer venrlun laii jingwbingg : anne ee dongrbut itding junjai, hingtew marr cniurr sidjer-siong hitt ngiu. Jap-veh sewqiw ee puepnuar dethak qinvunw inw be kiw guaw ee hingwtauu, jap-qauw sewqiw ee dethagqax Hegel jokpinw-diongx ee gixgenn m na sangxser qycc byy qudcuir, hro guaw simqniax li hng ~, berdangr siongsinr tihh. Ix cniurr qimwvir dirr sugiw ee duarlauu-lai, qycc dirr hitt xee lrongg-aw lai dua sniax luan huachiux.

SCHOPENHAUER LAII JIYR QNGX

Tamwsyh au, guaw did diyc jit xee dua huathen --- Schopenhauer (1788-1860), si derr id xui qongw diyc sewqair tongwkow ee langg, bagjiux tiw kuix siwqer knuar e diyc tongwkow; iauxx qycc qongw diyc hunwluan/ jingiok/ siaog ... dringw, langg' soxx byy juwir .diyc :ee, qycc juanlik qra crig .zip .laii simjniaa ee hiabdiau/ lixqaiw nirr. Jongw qongw jit qxur, Schaopenhauer zinruii uxdiu ee qicow, m si itcer longxx hiongr sxen :ee, ix byy qongw jyrbudjuw ee jinsen/ byy tee kiw uxdiu ee hiabdiau hyhaii, tywdit jriw cud, zinlui ligsuw visiongx ee jinwdingg/ dairjurzenn jankog bujingg nirr, amwhok kiamwsid; congwjy sewqair ee iwjir si bongbok. Jitt jiongw jinghingg m na guaw jaxqii quancad puawvne/ ban ban siw .kir ee hii, holii/ qnuaa .siw, iaux .siw ee jiauxjiah soxx jingwsit; hueluiw kuix qaxx jin' suiw ee erbin, amkamr dirr cauxvox-lai qokk jiongw bujingg viqiok : dorqunw virr qui' qrunn qauxhia qydnii qaxx siw .kir/ kuntiongg horsiong qa duiwhongx, tiah qaxx jit der jit der ... ham' langg qauongw, guaw marr virr qawsi, m hyw dan' hongbin siongsinr langg vunw sxen/ jniawdit. bad jurqiw taiww cingcyw lehh, jixhyw jiamrr qra jurqiw/ dongrbut kuvet kuix .laii.

Schopenhauer duiww sewqair imamwbin ee biysut, did diyc guaw byy vyxliuu ee janwdongg, mrqyxx byy qac'ir ix ee qaixquad vanrhuad. Guaw qnaw qongw, ix soxui ee "iwjir" sidjer si jriw jyrbudjiaw --- siongrder, arr dyrr si qongw, siongrder si bongbok :ee. Guaw ui' qinggiam-diongx jaix, siongrder be uirr zimrhyy vutqingr laii siurkir; sianghuanw, Ix kyxlingg kacc qoxbuw anne ee hing'uii, hnuahiw qiyr cniw zinlui qngbingg/ jikqik ee jit bin, marr iwair huanwkiw langg imamr/ siaokbin. Schopunhauer ee quandiamw be hro guaw koxnauw, guaw zinruii jex si jit xee u sursit jingwbingg ee dingrlun. Mrqyxx ix zinruii "uirr beh hro bongbok ee iwjir qaixvenr jurqiw, qandna' erdangr ixx lixdir ee hingsiong binrduir" kiokk hro guaw dua dua sitbang. Iwjir qiwzenn si bongbok :ee, jnuaxngiu erdangr knuar cringx jitt xee hingsiong neh? Dyrr si knuar qnir, hingsiong kiokk e jairr ix hnuahiw jit diamw aw byy cacyr henxhenr cud laii, anne beh zuhyy suechok/ qaixvenr jurqiw neh? Iauxx u, lixdir si sniaw? Si langg linghunn ee jit jiongw qonglingg, m si jit bin qniar, jixsirr jit bin qniar qik ser ee jit siyw pnir. ginxaw tec dirr ciuw nirr siongr zidtauu hex hiacc ser pnir, dyrr erdangr qra zidtauu jiyr qaxx enng (huex) .kir, guaw byy liauxqaiw :ee, si Schopunhauer duiww lixiuu jiacc byy cionghunx ee huedab suacc qamxqag buanxir.

Guaw qyckacc tetdew genxqiur Schopunhanuer, duiww ix ham' Kant (1724-1804) ee quanhe inwsiong zuxx laii zuxx cimkig. Kaisiw tak jitt xui dethagqax ee duwjog, digvet si "sunn lixsingr puepnuar (Critique of Pure Reason)" hro guaw dimm zip cimx cimx ee simsux-lai. Guaw ee noxlik did diyc vywdab, huathen Schopunhauer dethak texhe ee qinvunw kiamwkueh/ huan diyc jit xee diwmia ee cywgo --- qra jit xee ciaubudjid ee juxdniux zinqechuar, qycc qaixsueh jyr dansunn ee vunxtew --- jurjairbut iongxiuw qokk jiongw digsingr. Guaw si ui' Kant ee diwsiklun zinrbad jitt diamw, diwsiklun hro guaw did .diyc :ee, viw Sochopunhanuer "viquanx" sewqair qyckacc je ee kexhuad, zuqyw ix ee lixlun qniaa e tongx.

Dethak ee jinwdenw ui' jap-cid huer kiw, itdit ensiok qaur tak ihagngi au jit dnxua siqii. Guaw duiww sewqair/ zinsingx ee taiwdo sanxsingx qikbingrsingr qaixvenr. Ixjingg guaw jin' byy dnaw/qniax pnaixser, ciongbuanw byy sinwzim, cnengg sanxziok, qenrkongx jongrhongw byy unxding; jitmaw guaw kiokk duiww soxu dairjir sanxsingx qionglet duiqiuu jinsiongr, guaw jaix guaw beh air sniaw, zinrjinx jauxcue. byy qycc utjud, simsinn kuix/ air ham' langg qongxue. Guaw huathen, sanwciah m si sanxsingx tongkow ee juxiaur guan'inx; u jnii qniaw byy viw cing puar snakor ee qankow qniaw kacc iusiur. Kacc cimjann ee hingrhog guan'inx m si lakde-aw jnii jerjiyw. Guaw qaux jerje hyw ving'iuw, qamxqag kax dac toxde qyckacc sidjai, simrjiww qnaw qongkaix qongw cud jurqiw ee quandiamw. Mrqyxx jin' qinw dyrr huathen, gorqaiw jriab lecc laii, jurqiw marr qamxqag hiyrhuew, guaw m na sriu diyc vadd langg knuar kinx/ tixciyr, iauxx u dig'ir ee huanxvog. Hro guaw qamxqag diyhqniax/ pnaiw knuar ee si, mow quaw langg zinruii guaw air cauwdnua/ saixpair/ penwjuw. Ixjingg jixjig guaw kipenr ee qongxhuad jaiww cuthen, jixvutqyr ngua jit xee kacc unhyy ee hingsid. Jitt vaiw, ham' jingg vaiw qang, si jit xee jokbunn debak inw kiw guaw iwsinn, zinrjinx siaw, iong kuiwlat siujingw jabjngg, kiokk did diyc huixbedsingr ee dnaxqig. " jex si Jung ee jit pnix bunn" laursux qongw " kaksit bunvid u sincaiw, mrqyxx cosimx dairir/ vid jit giac, dyrr siaw byy tingg, jin' iong'i knuar cud jokjiaw byy zinrjinx. Jung, taiwdo jiacc cinwcaiw, dirr sing'uac nirr si qniaa be tongx ee. Giamsiog zinrjinx/ jurdong-jurqag/ kinbenw pacvniar si sing'uac itding rair :ee. Liw knuar moxmih langg ee bunn, ix byy liw ee jingcaiw, mrqyxx ix kacc lauxsit, zinrjinx he siqanx jyr, jex jiacc si qniaa hiongr singqongx ee lo."

Jitt vaiw ee sionghai byy cniurr derr id vaiw hiacc giamdiong, m quanw anxjnuaw qongw, laursux duiww guaw jitt pnix bunn iauxx si inwsiong cimkig, marr byy jixjig guaw si caux laii :ee, iuguann anne jyr qetlun " 'sihak' qongw, siongrr iusiur ee siquax si knuar be cud congwjog sinkow hunziah. liw ee jokbunn byy hxuad hro guaw anne siongsinr, jitt lairdew qandna' u cinwcaiw, byy he kuiwlat lyc .kir." guaw jaix, hitt pnix bunn iauxx si u quaw digvet ee soxjai, jixsirr laursux vindnua tyxlun/ ix ee jikvi guaw iuxsow huanxvog.

Jitt hxang su hro guaw damrvyc tongwkow, dongyc ee huaigii qyckacc tiamw, inx uihiap beh cniurr ixjingg anne qolip guaw. Guaw jimjiog sniu guan'inx, dauwdew jyr liauw sniaw su, qingquer siongser tamwtniax, guaw jiacc huathen, inx tyxiar guaw, si guaw ciangjai vinglun/ amwsi jurqiw kyxlingg marr byy liauxqaiw ee dairjir, vixzuu Kant/ Schopenhauer, simrjiww haghau iauxx bue kuikyr ee qoxsingbudhak; jiaxee huathen hro guaw jaix, sidjer-siong, soxu sriu diyc zedlet jnelun ee bunrdee longxx si ham' zidsiongg sing'uac jit diamw aw dyrr byy quanhe, hex si guaw siongrr amwngiaw ee viwbit, sriok "siongrder sewqair", siongrr hyw jit zri dyrr m hyw qongw, jongxsi hro guaw congr cingcyw ar.

Cuxau, guaw venr qaxx qinxsin, byy dirr dongyc qranx/ guaw zinruii singlenlangg-diongx qongw kiw jiaxee cimyr pnaiw lixqaiw ee dairjir, m quanw ham' si'angw qaudamm, guaw longxx e hro langg' zinruii vunn qequix/ penwjuw. Dirr soxu dairjir-diongx, siongrr dua ee tongwkow si, gauw suibongw sethuad joxjiw, iuguann byy hxuad kikhok luersimx ee hunlec/ luersimx virr hunquah jniajyr nng xee sewqair. Dairjir itjairr huatsingx, guaw jixhyw ui' zidsiongg sing'uac tuatli cud laii, jinwzip hitt xee byvnix-byhnua "siongrder ee sewqair".

"Siongrder ee sewqair" jitt jiongw qongxhuad, dirr mow quaw langg tniax .laii, kyxlingg u quaw qamxsiongx, guaw si be. Itcer ciauuat vingsionglangg ee surbut longxx sriok "siongrder ee sewqair" --- hniaxbak ee qngsnuar/ cimx bogbok ee oamr/ buhan ee kongqanx/ siqanx ee lingxcinr/ byy qamxdong diyc simx/ miarun qienn ee byy lixsingr/ sewqair ee sinvir qoxquair ... dringw.

IYVAIW DIRR JURZENN ZINBUNN KYHAK JI' QRANX

Zuxx duarhanr, verbuw/ qitnax langg zuxx jiap mng guaw beh jniajyr sniaxngiu ee langg. Dirr jitt hongbin, iauxx byy cingcyw sniurhuad, cuwbi inxcua guaw qniaa hiongr byy qang ee honghiongr : jurzenn kyhak qionglet kip'inw, ix ee jinliw si qenwlip dirr sursit-siong, juxiaur si dongrbudhak/ qoxsingbut/ derlixhak, kurtew sursit/ ligsuw vuerqingw, tiaur quer iwgi insor, jin' dua ee tingdo buanxjiog guaw id-hy zinqeh ee su'iaur; zinbunn kyhak si Hiliap (Hellene)/ Lymaw/ Aiqib/ suxjingg kyxqow. langg/ ligsuw ee qenxqiur teqiongx hro zi-hy zinqeh iuxli qauwdy. Dongzenn, hitt sii guaw iauxx bue zinrbad .diyc, jitt jiongw siongrr qongxkuah ee kyhak suanxdik si zuarr huhap guaw luersimx zinqeh ee digsingr; vixqauwjongqaurhak iuxquanx ee itcer marr kib guaw ee juwiwlik, iwsinn iuquanx jingsinsingr bunrdee, qidiongx qycc kansiap diyc dethak, qinggiamrjuxgi insor dirr jitt xee lingxhik kinx qaxx qiongbecc byy .kir.

Guaw dirr jitt nng qigtauu ji' qranx kiuw laii giuw kir, jin' dngg jit dnxua siqanx sniaxsu dyrr byy hxuad jyr quatding. Guaw juwir .diyc, maxmah aurtaucur ee a'qu, si Basel St.Alban qauwdngg ee bogsux, kinx kinx aw qra guaw sag hiongr sinhak. U jit vaiw, ix ham' viauxhniax (ix quiw xee qniaw longxx si sinhagngi hagsingx) tyxlun iuxquanx jongqaur bunrdee sii, guaw duxhyw jre dirr vnix :a, ix juwir diyc guaw huisiongg juansimx. Guaw jitgii, hiaxee ham' dairhak nirr hro langg tauu hinn ee hagbun u bidced kanlenn/ diwsig viw vaxvah qyckacc honghur ee sinhagqax si m si junjai? Inx ee damue byy hro guaw qamxqag inx quansimx sidjer qinggiam/ luirsu guaw ee texgiam, jewhanr dirr "singwqingx" ee qauwgi, soxu jiaxee quandiamw longxx hro guaw qamxqag byy songxkuair, "singwqingx" nirr u taiww je qandna' erdangr benxqiongw suechok langg ee qijig.

Dagg lexvaiwsir, guaw kir dairhak irvirkyx qydiongx tniax kxyr, diongdaur dirr jitt xee a'qu daux jiac vng, jin' qamxqig inx, diongdaur vng/ cair vutjiw pongpair, jiac vng sii qycc erdangr tniax inx duarlangg bingdir damue, jin' byy iong'i u jitt jiongw qihue, huathen anne ee hyw dairjir si junjai ee, si qibiau texgiam, gunw daux jurlaii m bad tniax quer zimrhyy langg jiurr hagbunrsingr ee bunrdee jyr tyxlun. U sii guaw marr sniu beh ham' vaxvah giamsiog dramm, did .diyc ee hue'ingr kiokk si byy nairsingr/ e siamw dyrr siamw, hro guaw sniu byy. Itdit qaur aurlaii jiacc ban ban jaix, vaxvah si qniax sukyw :ee, jiacc kyxlenn! ix marr uirr jurqiw luersimx sewqair qokk jiongw gibun huann .siw .ar/ bih dirr jurqiw qenwqor ee vyxhorkag bongbok sinwgiongw/ byy hxuad jiapsiu unsur. Ix si "tauwquer dauwjingx vniar su'ngiaa", diyhh tongwkow hu cud dua kuiwlat qiongvig unsur .laii.

Sna' viw a'qu/ viauxhniax inx erdangr simvingg-kiwhyy tyxlun ligdai qauwhongg ee qauwquix/ qauwgi/ henrdai sinhak genxqiuwqax ee qokk jiongw quandiamw. Inx naxjunxx anjuann kngr dirr jit jiongw qongw be cud sewqair sunrsi-diongx/ be qongw diyc F.Nietzshce (1844-1900), benxqiongw ylyw Jakob Burckhardt (1818-1897) : "juriupair" "jit xee sniu' quewdo ee juriuu susiongxqax, qongxx si dirr surbut ingxuanw sunrsi nirr qniaa penx .kir. A'qu jurlaii byy huaigii guaw likuix sinhak huisiongg iauuanw; jitt xee vutditvud hro ix sitbang, guaw sidjai qamxqag jin' uiham, ithiongr m qnaw qra jurqiw ee bunrdee he dirr ix ee binrjingg, jex jongw e duar laii jailan. Guaw marr be ter jurqiw venrho, id-hy zinqeh jin' qinw dyrr qniaa qaur taujingg, guaw ee kyhak diwsig suibongw kiamwkueh, kiokk jin' cingcyw dongsii ee kyhak budjitjuxgi/ jixsirr uirr tongwkow ligsuw jyr qenwjingr/ Kant ee "sunn lixsingr puepnuar" soxx kanjer, dirr guaw jiuuii ee langg, henxzenn byy langg lixqaiw Kant. Dyrr si guaw hitt xui sinhagqax ee a'qu/ viauxhniax inx ixx ylyw ee kauxkir qongw diyc Kant, kiokk ixx ix ee guanliw laii hro huanxduir quandiamw :ee byy biurjuw, m si qoxbuw duiwhongx laii zinrdongg. Quanhe jitt xee, guaw qangrkuanw byy qongw jit qxur ue.

Aurlaii, ham' a'qu inx qui' qehuew qang dyh jiac vng zuxx laii zuxx byy songxkuair. Guaw u sibquanwsingr ee huanrjue iwsig, vaiwsir venwjniaa pnaiw qetdiau ee zidjiw. Dirr siarhue anding/ jingsinn simsig ee jitt xee sewqair nirr, guaw zuxx byy jurjai, kiokk qycc huisiongg qiawbang kib diyc inx qikle lixdir ee dnix jnuajuiw, jit ~nng dih marr hyw/ jurzin byy lauxsit/ jerje qenwsiauwdai, duiww jurqiw singzin " driyc ar! Liw si penwjuw! Liw qongw vehcat, kipenr duiww liw hyxir ee langg. Jiaxee langg sing'uac dirr jit xee lixdir sewqair siarhue nirr/ qinvunw m bad sanwciah/ jongqaur si ho'ngg cniar laii jyr jitgiap/ uanjuann byy iwsig .diyc siongrder vunxlangg ersaih qra jit xee langg ui' sunrsi diauliw ee jingsinn sewqair kiuw .cud .laii/ qycc hro hitt xee langg jysiu bxan langg pruir cuiwnua/ jex itcer longxx m si inx ee quewcyr. Guaw byy vanrhuad qra inx qaixsueh jitt diamw, diyhh sriu uanongw/ jurqiw ter langg cutjue, yc erhiauw zimxsiu." vuthing :ee, qaur dnaxx, guaw ee noxlik iauxx bue did .diyc diongrdua ee singqyw.

Duer diyc jitt xee dyrdig ciongtut jiamrr jingqax, zi-hy zinqeh duiww guaw laii qongw zuxx laii zuxx ho'ngg huaigii/ tyxiar, guaw marr byy qycc amkamr jitt xee sursit. Noxlik sniu beh siauduu zi-hy zinqeh, itdit byy singqongx, dirr haghau/ ham' vingiuw jywhuew, erdangr be qir ix, dirr guaw genxtak kyhak sii, ix marr e siaubyy .kir. Mrqycc jid'err qaur qandna' jurqiw jit xee langg, dirr cur-lai/ jngkax sii, Schopunhauer/ Kant vorvinn qycc longxx dngw .laii ar, vauquad "siongrder ee sewqair" jongwle uihiap. kyhak diwsig marr qowsingg qidiongx jit vorhun, jitt xee dua uervor rue buanw uac lingwlingr ee sikcaiw/ zinbut. Jitt sii, id-hy zinqeh/ iusimx jitgiap suanxdik byy .kir; jex si guaw dirr jap-qauw sewqiw siongrbuew jap dxangx, huatsingx cuwbi ee siyw surqnia. Dng' guaw ui' quewkir jerje sewqiw jingg jingjenr, dngw laii qaur henrsit sii, jit jiongw be sik'ingr ee qamxqag sui' duer .laii,guaw, iacc si qongw id-hy zinqeh, sing'uac dirr jitt sii/ jitt xee soxjai, jaxban e hingsingg ix hibang suanw sniaw jitgiap ee kakding sniurhuad.

Quixarr vaiw, vaxvah ham' guaw zinrjinx qaudamm. Ix qongw, jairr guaw qac'ri juriuu yc zimrhyy mic, mrqycc zuqyw guaw guanrir jiapsiu ix ee qenwgi --- mair suanw sinhak. " jniajyr liw hnuahiw ee zimrhyy langg longxx ersaih, mair si sinhagqax." ix qadang kauxkir qongw. Jitt sii, gunw ji' qranx ee sim'ir sna' hap, mow quaw dairjir ersaih qongw/ jyr, be sriu jikvi. Guaw jinrliong byy air kir qauwhue/ byy camqax singwcanx gisid, vaxvah longxx be me. Likuix qauwhue zuxx hng, simlai zuxx hyxser. Ui'id siauwliam :ee si quanxhongkimm/ habgak, juadduir m si "jongqaur tuantew", dirr guaw knuar .laii, sidjai m si "tuantew", duiww guaw uanjuann byy iwgi. Qauwhue soxx qongw ee sewsioglangg, dikhing kyxlingg kacc qiamw .quaw, lingrgua jit bin laii qongw, kiokk si qyckacc jniawpair, inx qamxjingg jurzenn/ habqunn/ zet simdngg/ jinsingg duiwtai langg'.

Guaw kingxding qra vaxvah qongw, jit diamw aw dy' byy sniu beh jniajyr sinhagqax, iuguann iyvaiw dirr jurzenn/ zinbunn kyhak ji' qranx. Jitt nng hxang longxx jin' kip'inw guaw, kaisiw iwsig .diyc, zi-hy zinqeh si byy kongqanx. Dirr hiax, guaw huac quer jitt sii/ jitt de ee huanruii; dirr ix srinx-siong, guaw qamxqag jurqiw si dirr jit xee cingx qanw uxdiu-diongx dogid-buzi ee jit luiw bagjiux, mrqycc berdangr cniurr jiyhtauu-aw hiacc ciangjai suaw dinxdang. Id-hy zinqeh huanxkongr jitt jiongw virdongrsingr, byy sniu beh ingg ingg bysu, mrqyxx jitmaw, ix hamrzip byy qaiw ee maudunw-diongx. Ixau e huatsingx sniaw dairjir, guaw jixhyw ban ban aw danw. Narr si u langg mng guaw sniu beh jniajyr sniaxngiu langg, guaw e huedab " gixgenn juanqax". Viauxbin si anne, sidjer si guaw qac'ir iuxquanx Assyria/ Aiqip ee kyxqoxhak. U ingg qewsiok tak dethak/ kyhak, iuqii si qawqii, ixjingg duiww maxmah/ mexmeh uanwtanr qongw "guaw jin' huann, m jaix beh jyr sniaw" ee zidjiw jaw quewkir .ar, dendyww jniajyr guaw siongrr bixbiau :ee/ benw sriu kusog/ jit xee langg bruw qaxx jin' hnuahiw/ vaxvah qycc byy dirr cur, dagg vaiw jitt sii, ix dyrr e kir Sachseln dorqar.

DERR ID VAIW IWSIG QINGLIK

Jixu jit vaiw lergua. Dongsii guaw jap-sir huer, virr sangr kir Entlebuch, hibang erdangr qaixsen u sii hyw, u sii baiw ee uirkauw/ byy unxding ee qenrkongx jongrtair. Hex si guaw derr id vaiw jurqiw ham' cnehun ee singlenlangg jywhuew, druar dirr jit xui tenjuxqaur sinhu ee cur-lai. Duiww guaw laii qongw, kyxpnar/ qycc kip'inw guaw ee morhiamw qinglik. Jin' jiyw qihue qnir diyc jitt xui sinhu, ix ee quanxqex byy sniaw digvet, ciangjai kiw singwde. Jit xui nilau ee jngkax isux jyr guaw ee qamwho, ix kuix jit qingx luxquanw-sid ee liauiongxngi, teqiongx qokk jiongw huehogqii vnerlangg druar ngi dirliauu. Jitt qrunn vnerlangg gorhuex-jabsig, u jycsitlangg/ qerqib qnuaguann/ jyr singliw :ee/ quiw xee laijurr Basel jin' u qauwiongw ee langg, qidiongx u jit xee ixqingx tec diyc poksu hag'ui ee huawhagqax (vaxvah marr u dethak poksu tauhamm, qisit jixsirr gixgenn/ giximx hagqax ziiw), duiww guaw laii qongw, jex jinsi jit xee belangg ee sinx huathen: jongxsngr u jit xui kyhagqax ar! Ix kyxlingg dyrr si hiaxee bad qokk jiongw jiyhtauu viwbit ee langg ji' id, ix si jit xee siauwlenlangg, qar guaw pah duiqiuu, mrqycc guaw jit diamw aw dyrr byy qamxqag ix kyxlingg si jit xee diwsig vaxhak ee langg. Guaw pnaixser/ hanban qongxue/ budix, sniaw dy' byy mng, junqingr ix/ qamxqag ix si guaw duw diyc derr id xee uac lingwlingr ee langg: ix dongrcad dairjurzenn ee viwbit (jiwjiyw qidiongx jit quaw bad jin' taur). Ix ham' guaw jre qang dyh/ jiac qangrkuanw ee vngrcair, u sii marr ham' guaw dramm quiw qxur ue, guaw dudzenn qamxqag jinwzip singlenlangg kacc jonggiamm ee lingxhik. Jitt jiongw derui ee tesingx did diyc jingwsit, si hixkyw camqax uirr qiawduar :ee anvaii qauiuu. U jit vaiw ee guarcud luxiuu, gunw camquanx jit qingx qikjiuxcniuw, juxlangg cniaw gunw pinxpingg jiuw, naxx siquax ee jingqingw:

gunw qra bongriux sangr hro .liw,

siauhunn ee bixjiuw.

Guaw huathen jitt siyw aux, hro guaw sinhunn vuex .kiw .laii, vuex kiw kir jit xee juann sinx/ liaursiongw be qaur ee iwsig jongrtair. Jaiww byy sniaw guarjai/ luerjai, guaw/ tnazinn, id-hy/ zi-hy zinqeh, longxx byy .kir .ar, qinxsin/ lunxdnaw byngiaw-byziah, tnix/ de/ uxdiu/ vee :ee/ vuex :ee/ suaw dinxdang/ sringx quann/ qangr lyc, soxu itcer, juann longxx jniajyr ittew. Gauw qamxqag qenwsiaur qycc kuaiwlok qra limx hro juir, naxjunxx dimm zip itpenr qiglok ee binngiu haixngiuu-lai, haixingw hiongbingw k.-kixlyc-l., guaw qra bin/ siangciuw/ nng qix kax dah ann dirr qowding budtew, vyxcii vnevang, qamxqag qelo naxx haixingw, cur/ ciu-aw decc iyy. "taiww janw lehh!" guaw sniu, "kyxsiyh, jiacc limx hitt sud aw." jitt jiongw texgiam qetqiok si jamxzenn tongwkow. M quanw anxjnuaw qongw, jongxsi jit jiongw huathen, jit jiongw suiw/ iwgi ee dingsiong, jixsirr guaw sniu' gong jiacc qra pywhai driau.

Dirr liauiongw dicbecc qetsog sii, vaxvah laii jriab guaw, gunw jre huexjunn qaur Luzern luxiuu, jinjniar kuaiwlok! Jin' hnowhenn huexenx qikir, anxjnuaw knaur dyrr byy qauwkuir, byy zuarr quw dyrr qaur Vitznau ar. Jit jxy dua snuax ngar knuar qui' jngtauu, vaxvah qra guaw qaixsueh u jit diauu qnaa kxiw-aw ee ticlo itdit pox qaur Rigi. Gunw laii qaur jit xee siyw huexciajam, hiax tingkyr diyc sewqair siongrr qiquair ee huexciatauu, huexdniaw si kiardit kngr ee, ki'ciaa ee qakdo jin' quaiwgii. Vaxvah jnrix jit dniux ciapiyr dirr guaw ciuw-lai qongw " liw ersaih qaqi jit xee jre ciax kir qaur snuax-dingw, nng dniux ciapiyr sniu' quir, guaw dirr jiax danw liw, kacc sewji lehh, cenban m hyw siag .lyc .laii."

Guaw hnuahiw qaxx ue qongw be .cud .laii. Kia dirr snuakax, jitt jxy snuax viw guaw knuar quer zimrhyy jit jxy qyckacc quann, ham' donglenn soxx qnir .quer ee huexangg ee snuax jin' jiapqin. Jitmaw, guaw cavutdyx si duarlangg ar! Uirr liauw jitt vaiw luxhingg, guaw brew jit qix dikqnuaiw-aw/ jit dingw kiaa bew iong :ee Ingqog by ---duiww jit xee kuaniuu sewqair ee luxhingqax, jex si siongrr sikhap ee mic ar. Jitmaw guaw dyrr beh vreh kiw kir jitt jxy siongrr quann ee snuax ar! M jaix dycc jit xee jiacc si digvet quandua :ee, si guaw? Qnaxx si snuax? Hitt daii qibiau ee huexciax cringr diyc kuir, itdit qra guaw giuw kiw laii hro guaw tauhinn-bag'amr ee snuax-dingw, guaw knuar diyc jiongxjiongw sinx ee cimqog/ venwhuar buhan ee qingxsiong; juewau kia dirr kongkir huisiongg vyc ee snuabuexliux, knuaw duiww byy hxuad siongxsiong, siongrr hng hitt vingg. "ar! Driyc lar! Dyrr si ix, jex dyrr si guaw ee sewqair, jinjniar ee sewqair, hitt xee viwbit, hiax byy laursux/ byy haghau/ dagg diauu bunrdee longxx dab ee cud .laii, dirr hiax, jit xee langg iuguann erdangr jurqiw qodok junjai." guaw anne sniu. En' diyc siyxlo, guaw jin' sewzi qniaa, siwjiuuii longxx si quandua ee kiarviah. Itcer huisiongg jonggiamm, guaw qamxqag jit xee langg vreh kiw laii jiax, diyh'air kiamvix-iuxlew, diamrjing-bysniax, ixqingx laii qaur siongrder ee sewqair ar. Dirr jiax, si iuxhingg ee henrjai. Jex si vaxvah sangr guaw siongrr hyw/ siongrr dinquir ee lexmic.

Jitt xee jingqingw lauu hro guaw ee inwsiong si jiacc cimkig, hro cuxau dirr "siongrder ee sewqair" soxx huatsingx ee itcer, dirr guaw ee qiwig-diongx uanjuann buah siaux driau. Jitt vaiw luxhingg, id-hy zinqeh qycc kurtew henxhen, lauu hro guaw ee inwsiong, jitsewlangg qir diauu simqnuadew. Guaw iuguann knuar diyc jurqiw, duarhanr doglip, dir osig by/ ciuw tec quiwkir ee qnuaiw-aw, jre dirr jit qingx ciahuaa kiwpair qiongdenrsid dua vngrdiamr ee kiarpyx-dingw; iacc si dirr Vitznan sniaci bixle ee huehngg-lai, jit liauu ser jiah dyh-aw/ vehsig dycqinx, jre dirr dyh-vnix limx jaiw sii ee qavix, taudingw ee zidtauu jiyr taur diaubunn huecauw ee vowpangg, guaw jiac jit der guehbaihingg ee pxangw, dingxbin buah qimngsig ee baxdah/ qexjixqyx, simlai sniu zuac .langg qawqii jiongxjiongw uanjiog qewue, limx quer qavix, ving'unw ee kavo, ban ban qniaa uaw kir huexjunn dingw, kuix hiongr Gotthard qapp luirsu jitt ngiu ee dua snuax, snuadingw iuguann dar diyc vec siaksiag ee seh, ginsig qngngiaw siamxsih.

Ixau quixarr jap nii, dagg vaiw narr si qangjog quewdo, sniu beh cue hiyckunr ee soxjai, jitt jiongw qingxdir dyrr e puu .cud .laii. Guaw si zuarr hibang dirr henrsit sing'uac-diongx jaiww qnir diyc jiacc jongwle qingxsiong, vutqyr itdit byy sidhen.

Jex si guaw derr id vaiw iwsig qinglik, quer liauw jit ~ nng dxangx au, vaxvah dirr Sachseln dorqar, guaw kir knuar ix, ix ham' hiax ee tenjuxqaur sinhu jniajyr ving'iuw, dirr guaw knuar .laii, si jit jiongw duardnaw hing'uii, amr amr aw puewhok vaxvah ee iongxkir. Dirr hiax, camquanx liauw Flueli siudy ee soxjai/ Klaus siusu (Brother Klaus) ee singwbut, hitt sii langg qongw Klaus siusu ixqingx sringx tenx lor! Guaw byy cingcyw tenjuxqauwdoo jnuaxngiu jaix ix ixqingx dirr jiwhog-jiwlok ee qingwqair, iauxx si ix siwqer cittyy anne qra langg qongw? Guaw duiww dongde ee jitt xui siuxhorsinn inwsiong qik cimx, m na erdangr siongxsiong ix juansimx-juan'ir hongwhenr siongrder ee sing'uac, simrjiww erdangr lixqaiw. Mrqyxx simlai be kamx did kiw qalunxsunw, vuh cud guaw m jaix beh anxjnuaw huedab ee bunrdee : ix ee boxqniaw jnuaxngiu jit cutsir dyrr juwdnia u jit xee singwzinn ee angsair/ vaxvah neh? Gunw vaxvah digvet tniar guaw, anne qamxx si vaxvah m driyc/ kuatsid?

Guaw sniu "diryc ar! U si'angw erdangr ham' singwzinn jywhuew sing'uac neh?" ix bingvik jex si byy kyxlingg ee, jixhyw kir jyr unxsu. M quanw anxjnuaw, ix unxsiux ee siyw cur li inx daux byy hng. Jitt xee juxir be baiw : hro cur-lai ee langg druar jit qingx, guaw druar dirr lingrgua jit qingx li inx byy qaiww hng ee xui, cur-lai u jit liauu siaxzirdyh/ jit dxuix ceh/ vuu jit loo huew/ erdangr hangx quiw liap ladjiw jiac/ iong snax-kax-qxer diaur jit xee knax-aw juw tngx limx. Jyr jit xee sinsingr ee unxsu, benw kir qauwhue, dendyww u jit qingx jurqiw suxiong ee ser qauwdngg.

Guaw ui' unxsiux soxjai ban ban qniaa hiongr snuax dingw, jit lo ham zip cimsux-diongx, beh lyc snuax sii, jit xee siauwlenn qoniuu, sanw/ lyr ee hingngiaw cuthen, cing dongde hogjongx, jin' suiw ee binriongg, nasig iuxsen ee bagjiux. Naxjunxx si sxer-siong siongrr jurzenn ee dairjir, gunw jywhuew qniaa hiongr snuaqog. Ix ham' guaw dingxe huer. Duliauw gunw viauxhniax ixgua, guaw byy zinrbad zimrhyy langg, simlai jin' pnaixser, m jaix beh ham' ix qongw sniaw jiacc hyw. Guaw diuduu jit xe, qongw guaw si laii jiax dorqar/ dirr Basel junxvi tak dairhak ee qydiongx tagceh/ ixau sniu beh tak dairhak ji' lui ee ue. Qongxue ee sii, jit jiongw miardiongx juwdnia ee qiquair qamxjingg jauw .zip .laii . "ix cuthen qaxx jin' duxx hyw." simlai anne sniu. " ix jin' jurzenn ham' guaw hiongr jingg qniaa, gunw naxjunxx tensingx jit duir." guaw taux siamx ix .jit .xe, knuar diyc ix qenwsiaur qycc himsen ee hogjap viauxjingg, jex hro guaw u quaw liongvue/ qycc u damrvyc qamxdong. Qamxx qongw jex si miardiongx juwdnia ee? Dirr jiax duw diyc ix jixsirr gnoxzenn? Jit xee longqax qoniuu --- qnaxx u kyxlingg? Ix si tenjuxqauwdoo, kyxlingg ix hitt xee sinhu dyrr si vaxvah sinx qaux ee ving'iuw? ix qinvunw m jaix guaw si si'angw. Guaw qamxx bersaih ham' ix dramm Schopenhauer/ iwjir hiyxding ji' lui ee dairjir? Ui' zimrhyy hongbin laii knuar, ix byy siaog. Kyxlingg ix hitt xui sinhu vingrr m si cing osig dyrpauu, vnewquiw-jywquair qniaa laii sec kir ee Iasohue huersu! Mrqyxx guaw berdangr qra qongw, vaxvah si sinqaur ee sinjid zinguann, jex kyxlingg e qra hecqniax .diyc/ dikjue ix, qyckacc byy kyxlingg qongw dethak/ moquiw --- suibongw moquiw viw Faust diongriaur, Goethe qycc hro Faust venwjniaa iong'i diongwqer/ siurpenr ee langg. Ix draur dirr tenjinx busiaa ee iauuanw qokdo-lai, mrqyxx guaw jit tauu jraix zip kir henrsit, jraix zip kir jybut ee uigiamm/ jongwle/ jankog ji' diongx, ix jnuaxngiu e kamx tihh? Gunw ji' qranx jac jit dow byy hxuad huac .quer ee quann cniuu, gunw ji' qranx byy hxuad/ byy kyxlingg u zimrhyy quanhe.

Guaw jin' siongsimx, qra simlai ee sniurhuad ab .lyc .kir, qra juanxsec kir be inxkiw mahuann ee uerdee-dingw, cniurr, qamxx si beh kir Sachseln? Tnikir be baiw lar! Hongqingw zuarr suiw ... dringw.

Viauxbin knuar .laii, jitt vaiw siy' duw, uanjuann byy iwgi. Luersimx neh? Qycc si jin' dang ee hunrliong, quixarr zit dirr guaw simlai seh be cud .kir, marr cniurr lo-vnix ee sinkamx ingxuanw lauu dirr guaw ee qiwig-diongx. Hitt sii, guaw ee simtair iuwdir, zinruii sing'uac si ui' dan'id/ horsiong byy quanhe ee qokk jiongw qinglik soxx qowsingg. U si'angw e huathen miarun- snuar e ui' Klaus siusu itdit lenqed qaur suiw qoniuu hiax neh?

LAUTAH-DINGW EE VIWBIT

Jitt xee siqii ee sing'uac ciongbuanw qokk jiongw maudunw susiongw, dairsingx, Sauopunhauer/ qidokqaur vunxlaii dyrr byy hxuad itdir; qycc laii, id-hy zinqeh marr sniu beh dui' zi-hy zinqeh ee apjer/ iusiongx nirr qra jurqiw qaixhongr cud laii. Qamxqag siaudimm :ee, vingrr m si zi-hy zinqeh, si id-hy zinqeh, iauxx byy hxuad qra zi-hy zinqeh vangr be qir .did ee sii. Marr duxhyw si jitt xee sihau, sianghongx ee ciongdut, guaw itsingx-diongx derr id xee u hertongw ee huanwsiongw vuh cud laii. Huanwsiongw jiamrr cuthen, jiurr guaw soxx qir diyc ee, iauxx u qinguann, laii jurr guaw huisiongg qikdong ee jit vaiw texgiam.

U jit zit, saivakhongx hiux huix qiyr, cuex dinxdong Rhine hyy ee pylong. Beh kir haghau ee lo duxhyw en' hyy-vnix, hionghiongg vakvingg sraiw laii jit jiah junn, juxpangg jin' dua, sunrhongx duiww Rhine ee siongriuu kir. Jex duiww guaw laii qongw, si juansinx ee qinglik --- Rhine hyy-dingw jit jiah pangjunn! Guaw ee siongxsiong snex sxit vuex jnriu tnix : zuqyw m si qandna' jit diauu qiplauu ee duarhyy, si jingxqyy Alsace venwjniaa duaroo, anne lanw dyrr erdangr u qokk jiongw pangjunn/ huexlunn ar, Basel jniajyr qangxkauw ... qamxx m si ham' druar dirr haiw-vnix qangrkuanw bixbiau. Itcer longxx e byy qang, lanw marr e sing'uac dirr lingrgua jit jiongw siqanx/ sewqair. Hiax byy qydiongx, benw qniaa jitt dnxua, kir haghau itding rair qingquer ee dngg lo, guaw e duarhanr, erdangr jiauww jurqiw ee iwguan anvaii sing'uac. Oo-diongx cai jit jxy snuax/ iacc si jit liap dua jiyhtauu, jit diauu ec/ dngg ee derqiab ham' dairliok siy' lenn, derqiab virr jit diauu qongxkuah unrhyy ced dng, unrhyy-dingw qxer jit jxy caa-qiyy, tonghiongr nng vingg si quann tah duarmngg, mng-lai siwjiuuii kiarpyx dingw u jit xee jin' ser ee diongsewqiw sniaci. Giamjiyc-dingw cai jit xee hong'ue simgiamm ee sniavyw/ dingw u quanlauu, jit xee bangrqylauu ---jiax si guaw ee daux. Sniavyw lai byy bixle iugnaw ee duartniax/ zimrhyy ciahuax ee hunziah, vangqingx poksit/ cavanw puewcah, kongqanx byy dua. U jit qingx huisiongg kip'inw langg ee dosursig, daddid zinrbad ee ceh longxx cue e diyc; u qokk jiongw buxkir, sniavyw-dingw qxer jit mngg duarpaur/ jit dui go-jap langg buxjongx zinguann josingg ee horue vordui, qi'binn quiw vah xee/ cirdniuw, guanlyw josingg ee cirgirhue dirliw, guaw si diranx huatqnuax/ diongrcaijiaw qiamx qowbun, kuidingg jiacc cutbin. Hiongr lorde hitt vingg u jit xee qangxkauw, guaw jit jiah siang'uii pangjunn tingkyr dirr jiax, junn-dingw u quiw mngg siyw paur.

Jex jingxqyy vowqiok ee quanqenr/ junjai bogdig dirr sniavyw-dingw lautah ee viwbit, jixu guaw jit langg jaix ee viwbit. Jitt xee sniurhuad cniurr hro den den .diyc qangrkuanw laii qaur guaw simdiongx. Lautah luervo, ui' qe sniacniuu qaur derharsig si jit qix dangg tiau/ iacc si cniurr jit qix langg ee ciuw hiacc cox ee denrlamxsyh, jitt qix dangg tiau ee siongrr dingxquann huncex jyr jerje iur iur ee hunqix, cniurr by hxingg; qyckacc sikdongx qongw, cniurr juxqinx/ jerje iuwqinx, tauu/ buew dendyww vingw, tauu dirr xe, iuwqinx hiongr jnriu tnix. Jiaxee iuwqinx ui' kongkir-diongx kipsiux moxjiongw byy hxuad siongxsiong ee mic, jiaxee mic huerjee en' dangg tiau inxdy qaur derharsig/ qangrkuanw jin' lann siongxsiong ee setvi/ cniurr moxjiongw sidgiamrsig, guaw dirr sidgiamrsig nirr iong dangg tiau ui' kongkir-diongx kipsiux ee sinvir budjid jewjy qimx-aw. Jex si jit jiongw ywvir, guaw duiww jitt jiongw ywvir ee singwjid m na byy/ marr byy sniu beh hingsingg zimrhyy quanliam. Jitt jiongw siongxsiong jixsirr u damrvyc qinxdniux huepiah sidgiamrsig sidjer-siong jinwhingg ee dairjir. Sidgiamrsig iauxx u jit hxang qimwqir : jit xee langg siongrr hyw mair cimqiur, marr mair mng ui' kongkir-diongx caixjip :ee, si sniaxmic budjid. Cniurr Goethe tee kiw maxmah inx soxx qongw :ee “ jixiaur qongw diyc inx, marr e hro iongxqamxjiaw auwud.”

“Sinlingg” iwbi diyc moxjiongw bersaih qongw/ qongw be cringx ee mic, vutqyr guaw vingrr byy zinruii ham' sunjing ee kongkir u sniaw vunxjid-siong ee cavet. Jiaxee iuwqinx soxx kipsiux/ sangr qaur dangg tiau :ee si jit jiongw sinlingg ee vunxjid, jitt jiongw vunxjid dirr derharsig venwsingg binghenw ee qimx qag-aw (Coin Gold), jex dongzenn m si hujiur ee huatsut, si suxx langg qingwpuer ee dairjurzenn qik diongriaur ee viwbit, guaw m jaix jurqiw si zuhyy lingxgno jitt xee viwbit, qycc rair hro cirgirhue ee guanlyw inx, simrjiww jurqiw, longxx m jaix ui' dyhh jiacc e jaix.

Ixjingg guaw kir tagceh/ harkyr soxx qniaa ee dngg qycc ho'ngg huann ee lo, simjingg hnuahiw suacc sokdew ar. Guaw cavutdyx jit qniaa cud haurmngg, dyrr jinwzip hitt jxy sniavyw, sniavyw-lai ee siarhue qetqor jiamrr huatsingx venwhuar, cirgirhue qixhingg liauw jit herlet huergi, jyr og :ee sriu dinghuat, jinggi :ee u juxcaii/ qongcinjiaw, duarpaur marr kaisiw huatsia. Pangjunn ee qapvanw cingliw hyw ar, hyhongx sun sun cuesangr junpangg tenw hyxser, kixpangg ar! Sewzi sraiw cud qangxkauw, itdit hiongr saivag .kir. Hionghiongg, huathen jurqiw ixqingx qniaa qaur cur-mngkauw, jit dnxua lo naxjunxx qandna' qniaa quiw hunjingx. Guaw cniurr kinsangx dyrr qra jurqiw sangr dngw laii cur ee bexciax-dingw lyc .laii, ui' jurqiw ee huanwsiongw-diongx qniaa cud .laii. Jitt jiongw jiacc songxsinn ee siaukenw qewsiok quixarr qywguec, jiacc hro guaw iawsen kiw laii, qamxqag u qraur gong/ kyxciyr. Uirr beh tewdai jitt xee vehzidbang, guaw kaisiw iong ser liap jiyhtauu-aw/ angmngtoo/ huejniux kixjy sniavyw/ hongue simgiamm ee pauwdaii --- Huningen iauwsair ; jitt xee iauwsair dongsii iauxx jin' uanjingw byy sngxhai, guaw dyrr u henrsingg ngiurvunw. Genxqiur liauw iuxquanx Vauban soxu kyxlingg cue e diyc ee honggi quiue, anne guaw jin' qinw dyrr sigsai qokk ngiursid ee hongue qisut, qycc ui' Vauban juanw qaur henrdai ee hongui honghuad, jinrlik iong iuxhan ee ciuxdnua laii qenwjy byy qang ee hongue bohingg. Iokk nng nii ee siqanx, guaw narr u ingg, jit tauu dyrr jraix zip kir jyr jitt xee qangdingg, jitt dnxuax siqii-lai, duiww jurzenn kyhak/ kurtew surbut ee diwsig unxding jingqax, jex dongzenn si uirr zi-hy zinqeh lirig.

Dngquw ixlaii, guaw duiww henrsit sing'uac liauxqaiw jin' jiyw, guaw zinruii, zinrjinx sukyw jiaxee si byy iwgi ee. Si'angw longxx ersaih kangsux-bongrsiongw, jinjniar iongxiuw diwsig qycc lingrgua jit huesu. Verbuw dong'ir guaw dingr jit hxun kyhak qikanx/ jin' iwsinn knuar, ciaucue/ siujip dirr Jura snuamec ee huawjiyc/ kongwbut, qycc u tangtua/ bingxsiur/ langg ee qud. Iaxsiur quttau si dirr Rhineland vnengiuu ee suabyxknex cue diyc ee/ langqud si uaxqin Huningen ee soxjai, laii jurr iokk 1811 nii lyc jongr ee bong. Marr cuwbi cauxbok, m si uirr kyhak, si jit jiongw byy hxuad lixqaiw ee guan'inx, si inx vutqaix virr banw kiw laii/ pak .siw ee qionglet jingqamw, cauxbok si u sniwmia ee, jixu singdiongw/ kuihuex qetqyw jiacc u iwgi --- jit jiongw amwcangr ee viwbit iwgi, siongrder ee jit jiongw sniurhuad, qaix virr qingwuir duiwtai, ixx detliw ee hnowhenn laii sukyw. Singbudhagqax duiww cauxbok ee knuawhuad jin' simsig, mrqycc hex m si qinvunw ee mic. Qinvunw ee mic si sniaw? Guaw byy hxuad qaixsueh, kyxviw qongxx, cauxbok/ qidokqaur/ sinn iwjir ee hiyxding si jnuaxngiu huatsingx quanhe? Jex si guaw byy hxuad tamwqiur ee su. Cauxbok henxzenn duar tenjinx-busiaa sinn ee simsinn, jex siongrhyw mair pywhai. Sna' duiwjiaur, tangtua si venwsingr ee cauxbok --- huex/ ciurjiw (quexjiw), iong tuiw/ dngkax siwqer vee/ cniurr hue'iap hitt ngiu ee sxit siwqer vuex, qui' zit byingg ged cauxbak jiac, jitt jiongw byy qimwqir ovec bruw ee hing'uii hro inx sriu diyc huixbedsingr ee cuxhuat, lak-guec sii, langg jin' gauu jautad qu'aw/ qokk jiongw motangg. Guaw duiww “soxu singbut ee dongjingg” giamqeh han dirr zedhueh dongrbut. Dirr qokk jiongw lingxhueh ee kajiacqud dongrbut-diongx ui'id lergua ee si canqapaw/ jniucii, guan'inx si inx ham' langg u mow quaw luirsu.

huedngw tauu iac