028　Be alright

In the fall of that year, Lady Fujitsubo would come to the Imperial Palace to meet Reizei-san, which was unusual. After Father passed away, his consorts returned to their parents' home, and she also lives in her mansion on Sanjo Street. I think her real intention is to see her son more, and I want her to do the same, but she will likely have strong hesitation. It is impossible for her to come to the Imperial Palace in secret, so when she comes, she inevitably stands out. 

If I had a force under the direct control of the Emperor, I could have protected her and her son. Father, who was her biggest protector, has passed away, and my mother and the Minister of the Right have taken power, so she probably sees the world as full of enemies.

Reizei-san had been looking forward to seeing his mom for a long time since it was the first time in a while. He has also started practicing his handwriting, and it seems to be many things he wants to show his mom: the books he is reading, the pictures he has drawn, and the instruments he has learned a new tunes on. 

"Mikado, please have a seat there."

"Thank you for your kindness." 

I played the role of Lady Fujitsubo and even had a rehearsal. The more Reizei-san grew up, the more he resembled Hikaru: tall, handsome, and smart.

"Will Taisho (Hikaru) come today?"

"Yes, I think he will come."

"I'll have mother and Taisho look at it."

Reizei-san said that with a big smile on his face, and I was moved by the thought that he might instinctively love Hikaru. After my ascension to the throne, he lives in Nashitsubo as the Crown Prince, and has been in close contact with Hikaru, who stays Kiritsubo next door. I wanted them to spend time together, even if they couldn't reveal that they were father and son. I want them to have as many happy memories as possible.

Since Lady Fujitsubo came, I thought that they would be able to spend some precious time together as parents and child, but Hikaru did not come with her. She was planning to return to her mansion after staying at the Imperial Palace for several days. 

◇◇◇

Hikaru came to the Imperial Palace on the day that Lady Fujitsubo was returning to her mansion. I wanted to have a private conversation with him, so after I had the court ladies leave the room, I asked him to come inside the bamboo blinds. 

"I was visiting the Unrin-in Temple."

As a souvenir, he shows me the autumn leaves, which are even more colorful than those at here.

"Did you enjoy your stay?"

"Yeah, it was fulfilling. I was reciting sutras and thinking about becoming a monk."

"Are you going to become a monk?"

"It's not possible right now, but someday."

I was surprised to hear that Hikaru also had a wish to become a monk. After losing his girlfriend when he was young, he lost Lady Aoi, and Father also passed away, so I suppose it was hard for him. The government has also changed since this year. Hikaru doesn't complain much so I'm even more worried.

"I wonder if Reizei-san is having fun."

"How about you go too?"

"I can't bother the mom and son time together after a long time."

Hikaru smiled somewhat reservedly.

"You can be parents and sons, if you join."

"...Cause I don't wanna be hated anymore."

Hikaru lowers his eyes and speaks sadly. Did something happen to him? I tried to casually change the topic.

"Reizei-san is very smart and has grown rapidly since he started reading and writing. He looks like his dad. "

"Since he's Lady Fujitsubo's son, and also a much more noble lineage than me."

Hikaru seemed to be in pain when talking about Lady Fujitsubo, and I thought I had failed in changing the topic. 

"Suza-ni, can you tell me be alright? Say, 'Hikaru, be alright.' " 

I suddenly wondered what was wrong with him, but I obediently followed him. 

"Hikaru, everything will be alright."

"...Thank you."

He listened slowly, savoring my words.

"I asked for this cause you resemble Father in some way. Thanks."

He thanked me and headed to Nashitsubo, where his wife and son were waiting.