September 2010
Journal entry 9/30
Spiritual food for thought, an introspective.
All my life I've had spiritual or paranormal experiences but since this past spring they've exploded with ever incrementing frequency and meaning. It seemed each event was for a purpose. *to get my attention, *to provide subjective proof, *to set me on a path to learn, *to turn my life around, *to teach, *to conquer fear and doubt, ect.
SO all this happens. BOOM BOOM BOOM, and then a lull..... Why? Why a lull? Why are there moments of silence? During those periods all the lessons I previously learned piles up in my head and start spinning in self examination. Which sometimes leads to negative feelings.
To anyone reading this it will be plainly apparent that I struggle with a lot of petty emotional things. Life is good. No, life is really really good for me. But I still find myself becoming distraught over peoples problems. And then when I can't help or fix it for them I find my self feeling dejected and sad. Almost as; if there is not anyone who blatantly 'needs me' that I can't possibly help anyone else. And I then let it fester in my self worth. If no one needs me then surely no one loves me. What kind of egotistical cr*p is that?!
Last night; the "Ethereal gang" was silent. Which led me to hold a pity party for myself. Over and over in my head-- thoughts of why do I feel this way? What is wrong with me. I have everything I could have ever wanted and I feel hollow, lonely, empty and weird. What is my problem. Pleas to spirit met with silence. Then a distant, "Figure it out yourself". So with a bad attitude I rolled over to the bliss of sleep.
Well, This morning Erik popped in and out to check on me. I call them his "HUG-and fly" moments. It's like I'll turn my head see a shimmer and the my head or left side gets flashed with heat and then it fly's away. Well, during this I can also have tentative brief words exchanged. This mornings words were, "Try harder".
Today's morning walk was a walk with Erik in silence. He met me at the elevator and we walked to the river. He's fascinated with river barges. But today's walk was in silence. I was lost in introspection. I was thinking about things He, his mom and Robert have said to me off and on. Then on the way back up crossing the river I had an epiphany. Nothing I'd not heard before; But, it really hit home hard.
Why do I allow my happiness to be contingent on others well being? Why do I think I don't deserve every happiness that life and God has to offer. I need to give myself permission to seek it all. I need to tell my self it's OK to be happy. That no matter the pain, that I deserve happiness. "See happiness as much as you can, where ever you can and love will always find you."
9/28 10 am.
Journal entry for:
9/27 am.
I am afraid this entry is not going to be as complete as I'd like. Sometimes so many things happen during any given day in relation to Spirit that when combined with daily personal life and work I forget some of the details. They are not important details. Far from having any bearing in spiritual development. But they do offer perspective to another reader.
This morning on the bus I was contemplating the vision I had the night before. I don't recall exactly the train of thought I was precisely having when the following happened. I was thinking of the images I see in reflective surfaces and trying to match them to the man I saw in my vision without success. The vision was so real and powerful that I thought; Surely it would have shown up in optical transfiguration's Ive seen. One image in particular always left me perplexed. It showed up shortly after Erik did. But I couldn't recognize it. And I was perplexed. It seemed to be of an old person. Their eyes, cheek bones, mouth and neck and forehead. It was very prominent. The image is placed on the glass just below Erik's and below my main guide, and next to my teacher Lydia. It is larger than the Erik image. And larger than Lydia, but smaller than my guides image.
Well; As I was thinking of all this. I thought, was this older man the guy in my vision. I got a resounding feeling of NO. Suddenly I heard the single name Benjamin. It repeated itself. Benjamin. Then, a gentle, soft cultured voice spoke. It kind of had the flavor of what I'd imagine an old fashioned British aristocrat would sound like in the movies. Then I thought, no, more like an older Ivy league professor. Not quite British, but definitely New England sounding. I was very taken aback. Roger wouldn't give me his name. He made me name him. Lydia made me guess. George's name just popped into my head. And well, the others were relatives of mine in earthly life. I thought, wha?! I thought this was supposed to be hard? The reply I got was a soft chuckle. I just sort of sat there in shock. Tasting the flavor of this Spirit in my mind. I got a vision of an senior, an older man, who's clothes flitted between robes of higher education and tweed suits, a cane, a lecture pointer, books, desks. It never stayed the same. Black robes, blue robes, tan suits. Spectacles and hanging loose skin, kindly eyes, thin hair. I thought WOW, who were you? When did you die? I got the mental image overlapped with the words, 50's 60's. I was confused. Then I got the feeling that,.... "it" "He" .... 'I died in my 60s in the 50's." And that he had lived several lives in the past few hundred years at various universities.
I just sort of zoned out into amazement. And well, when I got to work. I was making a lame attempt to get work done, while still being in awe of last nights vision and a few emails I received in relation to it. And doing a little research online pertaining to the vision. So, when I went on my morning walk. I revisited this new experience. I connected to Spirit as per usual. And boom, this new guide was already there. (Guides are never gone, even if you don't realize, they just wait for you--although they do come and go, but you'll always get someone new. The old ones can still hear you and show up if you call). He came in very very clear. The voice was very flavored and with culture; polite to an extreme. Erik was nowhere around that I could tell. Benjamin had a lot to say. Lydia was there. They talked about how they were there to teach and guide me. That Lydia was an excellent medium technician. That if I made certain choices later on, that she would be teaching me mediumship techniques. She even gave me more homework. And reiterated to me to keep my promise to her, to them and to God. Benjamin said he was there to help me write. He told me I needed to start writing now. To start making outlines and collecting and organizing information. He said in an ideal situation that I could write several books, expand my presence online. But not to worry that I still had time to sort it all out and nothing was set in stone and I was going to be allowed to make many choices.
Can you believe it? Homework from Spirits?! I thought I was done with school. Erik thinks this is hysterical. I am being called a total dork. I said, "Why do I have the urge to snuggle with a dead person?" Erik put his forehead on the side of my head and then I "SEE" myself being shoved on the shoulder by him on a grassy hill overlooking the ocean. He gives me a knuckle nookie on my head, ouch! We both have a messy head of curly hair. We both are laying there looking at the clouds ripping out grass and throwing it on each other. Then the vision switched to: -- He was sitting down on a hill of grass over looking the ocean. He was looking up at the clouds. I had my head on his leg, also looking up at the clouds. It was really breezy and sunny. Very strange. Very surreal.
I didn't hear from Benjamin the rest of the day, other than to tell me not to worry when i apologized for not reconnecting to him before bed. More than one person was around all night though. I was mostly tuning it out to pack and watch TV. But they were very active a certain points. Esspcially when I was writing to Robert describing something. In fact I was so absorbed in what I was writing that I turned my head slightly at some movement and saw the edge of fabric and a leg. Softly glowing pale pale white and tinged with blue. I startled and kinda gave a high pitched yelp. I quickly turned and said, Stop that! And I saw a shimmer form dancing around and just heard a raucous laughter. My entire field of eyesight roiled with fuzzy shimmer. I just rolled my eyes and said, cut it out. and went back to writing what I wanted to say on the Erik blog.
On a side note. I've gotten many many verifications that Spirits know what we say and do online. It's not the technology, it's the transference of thought they hear and see. I've even had the distinct mental impression of Erik looking over my shoulder at what i am writing. I ask, "Is this OK?" "Am I writing anything I shouldn't" I either get mental shrugs, or yes it's fine, or It depends on everyone's point of view. Perspective and thought create reality.
Well, I am off for another walk. The leaves are changing and the geese are flying.
Here is an interesting train of thought I had yesterday. I was listening to a pop song on the radio and it's title was called Invisible light, It's rather hedonistic and not about anything I'd want to talk about, but while i was listening to it I wrote this.
I think I was thinking that God, Spirit, Love across the universe is a combination of light and sound, and invisible light that reaches out to all of us, hoping we'll see it.
There is an invisible light
an invisible light
an invisible light within all of us
The light shines from within
It shines from without
In the dark, in the light
An invisible light
Within all of us.
Shining through us
from beyond the universe
An invisible light
piercing the hidden veil.
An invisible light
A light, an invisible light
from eye to soul
from soul to veil
from veil to Light!
An invisible light
within us all.
Come to the light
come to the light
the invisible light.
ps. 9/28: I almost forgot. I've been so overwhelmed by personal 'lessons" and messages--- That I forgot to write what the Spirit child George said about himself. Benjamin and Lydia were talking about their roles and I turned to Roger and asked, "What about George, I like holding his hand". Then George popped in and grabbed my left hand. Lately he's been 'flitting' in and out of various ages. Looking sometimes like a 10-12, sometimes 5-8, sometimes younger, sometimes a teen. It's so disorienting. His voice would change in age too. Well I asked him why. He said, he had died many times as a child. That he liked being a child. That he was learning from "US" so that he could live out adult lives. I am not sure what to make of it. But just sort of took it as a matter of fact. Then I asked Roger, what 'they' could tell me about guides. His reply was, "That's like asking- 'tell me about the universe'. It's too broad. Narrow your question down." I think I'll have to read up on guides more so I don't sound silly.
Journal entry 9/27
The past weekend:
Soooo, gist of this weekend was, once I worry about one thing, I start worrying about the Stupidest nit-picky things. Then on top of that, Spirit people want their say, and that just threw me almost over the edge. My 2nd nephew was born this weekend. They didn't want to know the sex of the baby for the surprise factor. But Spirit already told me it was a boy, and I couldn't say anything. And several times since Erik I've caught glimpses of looking through Spirits eyes seeing what they see. Only to have them tell you stop it, and don't tell people cause it's rude! Do you know how weird it is watching your dead grand parents dote over your brother and sister in law 3000 miles away? Meanwhile, while your trying to decide how to "escape" by what movie to watch... While your browsing your online netflix que; having Erik sit there and make comments about what movie "he" wants to watch.... Yea; (me flipping through the movies) Him' "nope, no, no, ugh-yuk, no, that'd be cool, no..." And have him or a guide say things like, "you really handled that badly, you gotta remember to connect to God when you start panicking like that. Then they will all back off for a while and let me sit and stew. Except I'll still visually-- see them or someone walking around, and it just reminds me, their not really gone, their just giving me space. So then I start to ignore them and trying to block them out. Only to be told by Erik, "you've been ignoring your guides all day, why don't you connect to God and then talk to them.
Sunday was more of the same. Still worried and upset which made me stress out about the littlest things. I get the funniest image from Spirit just now as I write that I am like being around a guy in the morning who hasn't had his caffeine. "Don't talk to him yet-He in a mood!". @ Robert, Oh, I think that was indeed Erik that turned my lights off when I walked away; Because after I wrote you about it, I went back down stairs and sat down I heard, "You're ruining the movie!" But I was too upset to tell who was talking. But only Erik says junk like that.
Well, 'they' pretty much left me alone the rest of last night. I went to bed early and just lay there praying. Kind of along the lines of "Please God, please help me, I don't know what I am doing, I need help." And as soon as I said those words, in just that short sentence; My entire field of vision faded and I was somewhere else. I don't know if it was entirely a minds eye thing or not. It was as if I was floating in a huge gray cloudy void. I looked down and saw my body crouched down kneeling in agony of prayer or something. I was floating above, but I was that person kneeling in the mist. Two places at once. Then, all of a sudden I moved INTO that body. Then all of a sudden it was as I was kneeling in front of stairs. And a man appeared and came down a few steps. He reached down and grabbed my chin. He was dressed in white linen looking pants and some kind of loose white smock or over shirt. He softly glowed white all over and his skin glowed so bright I could see no features, Except his hair. It was so curly. And in high definition. Kinda like those Sumerian or Persian carvings you see where each curl is highly stylized. Short curly hair and short beard. Each curl glowed with iridescence. And the light moved through it like and LED holiday light. Well, anyway. He grabbed my chin and brought it up. And just radiated this intense love. I could see something behind him, It was as if I was looking at the universe in Space. Nebula's, stars, space gas, dark and immense void that had no end. He turned my face back to his and said, "No, Look at me." I looked at him but could only see hair and creamy glowing light. He said, "Do not fear, Do not be afraid" He then put his arm around me and turned me around and said, " look". I turned around, turned my head, my eyes following his arm, to his hand, to his pointing finger. As my eyes followed the arm, my field of vision turned back into the hall of misty clouds which back lit his arm and when my eyes reached his finger; the clouds peeled back and all I could see was a blinding light that flared out and I saw nothing more.
I then opened my eyes laying in my bed. My heart was pounding. Only a couple minutes had passed since I laid down. I rolled over with tears in my eyes and said, OMG did that just happen?!? And I heard a voice in my head, "Do not be afraid, Do not be afraid." And well, that was it. I just rolled back over and went to sleep.
I felt fine this morning. Especially after getting more of -----'s comforting emails.
I have more to tell from this morning. I met another guide. But I'll save it for later in my regular journal section. I want to see what else I can find out and compare notes with someone about guides.
Journal entry
9/25-- am
I've had some bad news delivered at work this past week. A friend and co-worker of mine fell and is in the ICU with head trama. I am pretty sad about it and a selfish part of me was wondering if my guides or Erik could give me any information about it. I knew I shouldn't ask, other than to pray for the friend. Pray that whatever be God's will that it would turn out OK. That people would be comforted, and feel their loved ones comfort. So I asked rather if my guides or Erik had any words of wisdom on the situation, or what kind of things I should be asking. *(note-I do not consider myself a psychic only someone struggling down the path of trying to connect to Spirit. Meaning you should not take what I am told as holding true for psychics or other mediums-everyone has their own path).
I am afraid I am not that happy with the answer I got. Because I don't think it feels fair and it kinda hurts. But the only answer I could get was the following: "She's not alone, her Spirit family is with her", We are not fortune tellers and so much depends on the actions of the medical staff and her family. There are many paths she could go" "Many times it hurts too much for loved ones to know and understand the reasons why things happen the way they do. It is not beneficial to know now." "The grief is too strong" "You must accept what is given to you and accept what can not be given to you". "You have no idea the role she or this event is supposed to play in the lives around her, such as her family or the medical staff or even you." "It does not seem right or fair, but there is always a reason". "Take comfort in that she is not alone. Her Spirit family is with her."
9/24--late at night. Woken up from half sleep. Feeling sad about a friend in the hospital. For the first time Erik brought forward someone who had a message for me. An old coworker who had died this past year. "A._."-(name hidden for privacy)- I did not really know her but worked with her for several years and knew of her for a lot longer. She was a lot older than me and died of cancer. I wasn't friends with her other than a friendly office acquaintances with her and in fact other than feeling really bad about her passing and guilt for not attending her memorial I've not thought of her since. In fact, off an on in the far past I am embarrassed to say, that I had gossiped and said some less than nice things about her to some people. Of which I am really sorry for.
Well, Erik came and stepped back and she appeared by my bed in my minds eye. I could distinctly see all her features and she looked exactly like I remembered her right down to the really bright -loud knit sweater she was fond of. I was kind of in shock. She said she appeared this way because this was how I remembered her. She told me that she forgave me for the things I said about her and not to worry. She then verified what I'd been told by Erik and my guides regarding knowing the future of people in crisis, AKA my friend in the hospital. She said that during the "here and now" of the trauma/event, that it was often not the right time to know or understand the reasons of it. That only after the event and the perspective time gives can we have the opportunity to fully understand the reasons behind it. But that even then the answers may really hurt and seem unfair. But that God lets things happen for a reason. It's not up to us to judge those reasons. Only to try to learn from them. Then without another word, she was gone. I was kinda stunned. Why her, why did she appear to me, I would have never in a million years, have thought that she would appear to me. This is the 3rd spontaneous channeling of other people event that has happened since Erik showed up.
Journal entry
9/24-- 8:22am
Last night after I went to bed and was trying to fall asleep. I was drifting off and I feel Erik get real close to my head and says in quiet soft clear voice, " If I didn't love you do you think I'd go to all this trouble? If I was some evil spirit would you have been lead back to God?; would I have led you to a family of unconditional love and acceptance? Do you really think God loves you any less?" I immediately got up, went down stairs and wrote it down. The shimmer forms followed me down and waited for me to write it down and then vanished. I slept really well.
****7am
This morning on the way to the bus I was elated. A confirming and comforting email from a dear friend greeted me upon waking up.
Of course Erik was there dancing around me on the way to the bus stop. Not literally as far as I could tell, but in my minds eye. Ol mr. hot ear laughing away. And walking with him was a woman holding his hand.
She softly said, Seee? And then my minds eye clouded over and it was just her face in white fog. She put her face up next to mind and said, try to focus.
A button nose came into being. But when I tried to reach and see more, it got all elongated and distorted. And she said, no just let it happen. The nose went away and then little - higher cheek bones, elongated and appeared and then dissolved back into nothingness. She had dark silky hair, but loves to change the color.
In last nights vision it was feathered, and the tips seems fringed with color (purple?) matching purple pants. Big soft eyes, long lashes. I didn't get the eye color,in either vision but they were blue in the first vision yesterday afternoon.
Then it all blew away in a wind and Erik starts laughing like a mad man and then he and the woman pop into a dance hall on a stage and he whips out a "justin beiber" wig!-- and pulls it on his head like a hat and then sings "You gotta live your life" and then starts screeching, yes screeching in a squeaky high cracking voice, "Baby-baby, baby".. all the while he and the woman started, no; deliberately started dancing in a miming disjointed fashion as if it were a bad SNL skit. Erik shouts out, "See! I am cool like that!".
Then I numbly stepped onto the bus stop with a strange grin on my face and trying to keep the tears out.
**********************************************
Thu, Sep 23, 2010 at 11:42 PM
To: Jason, from -------
In my prior email, I said what I thought were your lessons in this life and this message (which I read after sending my input) only confirms it! :-) keep practicing and continue to work on shedding doubt as well as the other shackles I mentioned. I firmly believe those lessons are inhibiting your abilities. don't feel disheartened when spirit plays tough love either. they only do so out of unconditional love. they know that getting you out of your comfort zone, challenging you to work harder, and pointing out what you need to work on will pay off in the end. As Erik tells me, I'm "stuck on you" and here to help you fly!
I know sleep will help! have a restful night and don't pressure yourself. you are gonna succeed! I know it! as I've said, you are well on your way to the finish line!
big hugs to you and remember, your light shines brightly!! don't forget that! :-)
*******************************************************
Journal entry:
Thu, Sep 23, 2010 pm
I was contemplating how Spirits move through our time space and how we preciceve time as relative to their movements. And I drew the following image. I am sure it's scientifically nonsense but I think it's an interesting visualization stating that time is precieved differently depending on the viewer. Click on for larger size.
***********************************************
Thu, Sep 23, 2010 at 11:04 PM
To: Jason, from R
Erik and Jen are very playful with one another! We all converse and tease one another...well, Erik teases Jen and I...and I tease Erik. :-) if I lived with someone, I know they'd wonder what I am laughing so loudly at all the time! Erik now pops in while I'm chatting with others on the phone or typing emails...he LOVES to see if he can make me lose my train of thought and when he succeeds he laughs with glee...I never get annoyed...its just not possible...heh...
i don't believe there are any photos of Jen when she was on earth, as i don't believe shes been here for quite some time. I don't get moving images of Jen and Erik like you...it is largely auditory with still images when I choose to see them. I've seen Jen clearly. the closest person here on this plane to compare her looks too is Megan Fox....beautiful blue eyes, full lips...petite...Erik just popped in as I'm typing this saying, "my girl is the HOTTEST!"...when she and i chat, her voice is very feminine...soft, soothing, pleasant...she's also very humble, and shy at first. she prefers to keep in the background...which is very much the way I am. I'm so happy they found each other! they are a great match. if you haven't noticed, I'm a very, very detail oriented person too...grin. it makes perfect sense that you get a lot of imagery, since you are a big picture guy. i, on the other hand, am big on words, which explains why I get so much verbal stuff...
***************************************
Thu, Sep 23, 2010 at 10:31 PM
To: Jason from -------
Hi Jason!
------private email------ I totally understand why you'd be concerned, given your life experiences, but know that you are in safe, caring company. :-) I too had the same apprehension about contacting Elisa as you did with me...and Erik said the exact same things to me! word for word! since our initial contact, my life has only gotten richer...which is why I have all the confidence the same is going to happen for you!
---private email-----------
********************************
Thu, Sep 23, 2010 at 9:45 PM
To: ----- from, Jason
Hope your well.
I've had kind of a rough day. I don't know if you can relate or not.
A long tiring night of self torture and agony. More of the usual things. The self doubt. Worry, fear ect. Worry over an impression, a momentary vision- mostly. An impression that was fleeting. Was it right or wrong. No reply or validation.... so I surely --must be wrong, and, thus truly insane. Surely no one wants to be friends with or love a mad man. If I am mad, then I've lost Erik, a brother I didn't know in this life time, but feel this deep confusing connection to. The how's and why's I can't remember or understand. Only that the idea of loosing him gives me that empty pit in my stomach. Which only led to worry that you all wouldn't want anything to do with me either. Then I was worried I'd done wrong by the both of you.
All night long He and my Guides tried to convince me otherwise. They even moved a heavy string of hemp yarn 8 inches long. They moved it up almost 90 degrees as if someone whipped it up with their finger. This was in a closed up house with no air circulating. No way it could have moved on it's own. I even got up and stomped the floor and shook the book case to see if I could make it happen. Nothing. I begged for it to happen again; but, I only saw the shimmering figure walk back and forth.
I know very well I can't demand proof or instant replays. God doesn't work that way. But I whined and pleaded anyway. The shimmer form seemed to just pace back and forth, head shaking, "The experience always happens first then the lesson..."
Communication was constant. So much dialog, so many visions, so many things happen, I forget to write it all down. I don't know where to start. when I wasn't in agonizing self doubt. I kept thinking why would they/he want to keep hanging out with someone like me.
Doubting all this. While watching tv, I feel that both he and someone else were in the room with me. We tried to watch "Man vs Food" Episodes, of which he Loves. The Sasquatch burger! And it totally revolted the young lady.
You see, I saw a shimmer figure walk up to me. Sit down on the foot stool and my eyesight zoned out and my minds eye took over and I had a vision of what I thought to be a young woman sitting on a rock next to a tree on a grassy hill. The sunset in the background, across a painted sky. She was wearing dark tight jeans, maybe purple. And a cute little top with a print on it. You know like a band t-shirt. She had long feathered dark hair, kind of exotic looking, I dunno maybe emo looking, maybe dark mascara and she had one arm on one knee and kept flipping her hair out of her eyes with the other hand. She tired to comfort me. Telling me she was right there. To look into her eyes and SEE her. Focus on her eyes and make her features appear. I sat there memorized as she resolved in and out of focus. I wish I had been writing it down. The features seem to slip from my mind. I asked her "how will they recognize you?" She held out her foot. Painted nails. A big toe who's colors were shed from one color to the next to pink. In the center of the toe nail was a jeweled ornament. Her foot was wrapped in some kind of sandal, where the strap encircles the toe and twines up the ankle. Then she got up and walked away.
Finally I was so anxious that Erik told me to go take a shower and come back down because my guides had been waiting for me patiently all night. Once done, I came back down and sat patiently in my chair. Went through my meditation and prayer and excersises. Roger and Lydia tried to help me. Mrs T. came to me and said she wished she could make me food and let me play with her bird. She helped me connect. Only this time, she didn't pierce the clouds, she just opened the kitchen curtain.
Throughout the excersises Roger tired to get me to focus on his features as I did for the young lady; to bring him into focus. But it wasn't working, I kept pulling in others. I tried with my eyes open to see, but all I could see was the walking shimmers. Roger told me to stop cause I was going to make myself nauseous. In my minds eye I kept Twisting features so bad it was all we could do to refocus on shielding and spinning the images out of my head. I can feel Erik and my guides now-Where they are, when I spin the energy in my mind. It pulses against them and I can feel the backwash like a wave in a pool only it's feels like cool goosebumps.
In any case I lay there exhausted and self conscious, and Lydia appeared in front of me in my minds eye. She walked slowly around me, in her white blouse and black skirt, her pointy shoes and rolled up hair with that little hat. She leaned over and said, "look at me". I did and her face turned from a fuzzy white shadow form to a peaches and cream completion and her features elongated out to form her face. Then in an instant it was gone. I said, "I can't". She said, "No, you don't want to". She the sighed and turned her back on me. Only in my eyesight it was as if the back of her head enveloped my entire field of vision. She turned her head and looked down at my body and said, "You sit there feeling sorry for yourself, what should you be doing?" My embarrassed reply was, "connecting to spirit or reading up on spirit teachings" She said, "So what-- if your wrong" "We all make mistakes, you don't know what your doing" "How are you supposed to learn if you don't even try". I forlornly said, "I am so tired. How about if I just go read my science theory book?" She said "that would be fine. At least your doing something".
So I went upstairs and laid down. Erik tried to make me feel better but really only gently took me to task. He wants me to make the time to carefully detail out how I first heard Roger and how I hear in my head. I said, oh that's so much can you remind me later? So I promise I will try. Finally I read a passage in the book that I found inspirational and then started falling asleep. That passage was similar to and reminded me of what my guides and Erik have tried to expand on this many times, kind of summed up as "Yes the paranormal is indeed all in our heads, but at the same time very real. It's that perception, That perception of the combination of visual, emotional, mental, and physical input, that is the reality. This input interacts with our ethereal body that is plugged into Spirit. Scientist say matter that we can see only makes up a minuscule fraction of what the universe is made up of. What purpose does the rest of it have? We need to stop looking at the space around us and and start looking at the space within the space." He said I should just get up and try writing. So here I am.
I feel lonely. Which is stupid. I have a family that loves me. Just I guess I am scared now that I have someone to actually talk about this stuff with, I am sacred of loosing that and being alone again.
Hopefully sleep with wash all this away.
Sorry for bothering you. Thanks for listening.
**********************************************************************
9/23/10-personal journal entry:
A couple things I forgot to mention is that. Last night while I was jaw dropped regarding Eriks behavior; I did something I am not supposed to right quite yet. Soon, but not now. I will tell you a little secret. Some times I sneak deliberate glimpses into surfaces and try to sneak an eye sight shift to see if I can see Erik or my guides. If you don't know what I am talking about, look at this web site.
http://www.itcdeadpeople.com/index.html
I SEE this with my eyesight quite often. I have to force myself to not see. Of course when ever I think I am being clever and sneak Erik or my guides immediately say, "Nah!" or "stop it". I've been asked to promise not to do that without formally connecting to spirit and planning with them to do it or letting them initiating it first. See cause I went through a little period of personal problems that was affecting my vibration level. They wanted me to work on personal life stuff and then work in a more formal way.
Well anyway, back to the movie. I was so floored that I turned my head to a glass next to me to see if I could call up anything. It was a double paned insulated glass. Dirty with lots of reflected surface and static. My vision blurred over and filmed white and in the edges of where glass warped and bent met with reflection a face that looked awfully like his appeared. It seemed to smile or laugh and He immediately shouted "cut it out!"
Later that night getting ready for bed. I was writing it all down in my note book. I was complaining, about why do some people get told what their life's work is, should be, or will be? Shouldn't they figure it out themselves? Why can I sit here feeling fairly content when so many people are in pain? What is my life's' work?
All of a sudden I heard an unknown voice, "Show them how, show them how, show them how." I have no idea what that means. Show them what? Show them how? Who what? Channel? I can't give anyone answers. I don't even know what I am doing. I am nobody.
A bit later, when the light got turned off. Erik was standing in the room. Shadows flitted around the room. I felt no fear. Erik said, "You can see more if you want to. Do you wanna see? It's ok, you can look. I sensed his presence walk across the room, movement wobbled all over. I imagined a blue white haze in human form. I chickened out and said no. I am not ready. I closed my eyes and watched faces fade in and out of clouds behind my eye lids. --freaky or what?!
****************************************************************
Thu, Sep 23, 2010 at 9:21 AM
To: Jason, from Elisa
Jason, Erik could never sit still for a movie or anything else for that matter. He constantly paced, arms crossed, around the kitchen island over and over again. Plus, the medium Felix kept saying how he was playing drums on his leg, so that makes sense too. What a goof ball. I love that the personality survives death, don't you? I guess it depends on the personality, though!
Off to work!
Elisa
**********************************************************************************
Thu, Sep 23, 2010 at 9:09 AM
To: Elisa, from jason
Morning !!
Please forgive my spelling and grammar.
9/23/2010 8am--
My net flix DVD last night was the 'Transporter'. I put it in the dvd player and I join my spouse in the living room and plop down in my chair and Erik pops in and hollers, "Finally!, Something Good!". And I say, " What a slightly morally repugnant movie w/ cursory tales of redemption, love and rescue?" .. And he said, yea, not the best." Then I thought to myself. Kinda like the tale of humanity. But, as I like to call him, 'ol buzzing-hot-ear' sat down next to me for a good chunk of the movie. He does not say still for very long for anything. I have to say it's very bewildering having a disembodied soul do air drums and mime M & M style moves to a movie sound track... Or, shout out "Freakin-AWESOME" during an escape science. He also loved the axe-wielding fight scene. He said, "ninjas w/ axes". I think I spent the better part of the movie in shock. Trying to keep my jaw off my lap & and the same time struggling with every thing I've been going through. Asking myself why was I allowed to reconnect with my "REAL LIFE", regardless of how small or restricted it be. Why me?
Someone I greatly respect, Chris Di Nucci from the the Bristol Spirit Lodge Circle, told me I had retained an awareness of Spirit when I was born into this life. I wondered is it because I asked? Because I went looking?
The Answer according to my guides it's all about intent. God, The Universe, Spirit is not going to give you something you are not aware of or don't want. It's when you become aware of the possibilities that the possible happens.
Only you can decide what you want. It was only after I discovered that a family across time, space and the universe, created by God was a possibility that it was revealed to me as something tangible and real.
The very idea of close emotional family and friend bonds in Spirit; Family, could, can, -- does exist in forgotten bonds outside this mortal coil has been mind blowing!
Someone just flashed the lights on for a second & in that brief flash I saw a surprise party and a room full of people... I need help finding the lights!!
**side note.
Ok, I've got to tell you, being told, "Hello...!!, Seeee I told you!.. So stop being a dum-sh*t" by a spirit is a real wake up call. Here I am having a freak out, (yes, another one) whether or not a guy (Robert) is going to think I am a freak or not. & yet all the while we have so much in common.
ps. The "peanut gallery loves to 'roll his eyes and groan'.
9 am.--
It's been raining cats and dogs all night and this morning. More today. So no walks. Am gonna take the time to post most of my Elisa/Erik/Jason emails on my website. Thanks for being patient with me. Everyone tells me I am an old mother hen who spends all her time being a worry wart. I like to tell my self take little careful steps, but I have the will power of Gibraltar. So I'll get there eventually.
*********************************************************************
Wed, Sep 22, 2010 at 5:04 PM
To: Jason, from Elis
Ha!!!! It's pretty weird the guy knows my bowel habits! Geez do we get any peace, Jason?
Enjoy your cocoa.
xo
*************************************************************************
Wed, Sep 22, 2010 at 4:42 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Oh, on my way in from the walk this morning when I asked if he had anything to say to you he, just said, "Tell her I love her, and tell her, drink something hot, it would calm her nerves like tea and be good for her, but not to have too much or she'll spend all her time in the bathroom." I just thought that was really weird and random. Anywhoo...
Thanks again for all the encouragement. I think I'll be ok now.
It's raining here. I think I'll go have some coco myself! The trees are gettting so pretty.
I left work early thinking I'd clean the garage out, but no such luck. Between you and me, I work the U of M libraries and I am really grateful I can come and go freely from my job as well as take long walks though campus.
Jason
*************************************************************************
Wed, Sep 22, 2010 at 3:03 PM
To: Jason, from Elisa
Hey sweetness,
I have had tea. went on a green tea kick for awhile, but I always have my morning lattes from my Tassimo machine. Why?
Keep your stories comin' my love!
Elisa
**************************************************************************
Wed, Sep 22, 2010 at 12:19 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Elisa, Hugs as always-- Erik sends his love.
I asked him if he had any messages for you,..
btw/ Are you a tea drinker? He made a crass comment and it was so out there I don't know if it was me reaching or not.
Anywhoo...
The latest Erik banter is; I say, "hey little brother." HE replies with, "Hey old man". I called him a brat and he said almost immediately; "Old lady!".
9/22 11:30am --
Another intense walk with guides, Erik stopped in at the end of it. In my minds eye, my guides sat me down. And we talked seriously about the need to remember, and try with great effort to meet and fulfill my responsibilities. An large laundry list that was so easy, but so hard. All at the same time, I need to remember my recent promises to spirit. To work hard, to maintain, develop and grow my personal relationships, to learn as much as I can about Spirit (long list), To accept and work on my new responsibilities. And when the time is right to move in new directions without fear and with fierce determination.That I must do right by my families, (old and new), do right by them. That I must strive towards all this, at the same time; That I must tackle this with the same intensity I used to pursue obsession and channel it for the greater good.
I was and am totally overwhelmed. I was told I need to keep forgiving myself. That we are all human, we all make mistakes and will keep making them in the future. "We know you keep asking God for forgiveness and keep saying how grateful you are for second chances. Don't you know, God will always give you a second chance. You will always be welcomed back. That doesn't mean you don't have to pay for the consequences of your actions. If you had gone down that road, you very well could have gotten a fatal disease, been beaten, lost everything and lived a life of pain and suffering. Empty relationships and personal strife. But God would have taken you back. You just wouldn't have been able to help anyone and would have lived only to learn the empathy of pain. But you didn't so quit doubting yourself and go!"
Towards the end of the walk I was experiencing the renewed guilt of the imagined possibility of loosing all this new communication, of loosing Erik of I don't know... just me being a worry wart. Erik came up to me, and put his arm around me and said I was being ridiculous. That would never happen, but even if it did, I have to keep on living, and that, that was a lesson in of it self. Was I gonna sit there in paralyzed in doubt and fear and selfish self loathing or was I gonna do something about it. I feel overwhelmed. Living mindfully I guess is where I start.
I just hope I can get on with gettin on and not let too many people down. Where to start, where to start. Erik says I need to work on reconnecting to my brother. He's bipolar and went off his meds cause they were making him sick and he and his wife are expecting their first baby. I feel intense intense guilt regarding them. I took my brother off the street as a young adult and we battled his disease and his drug addition and suicidal feelings for a few years. I always felt if I could just fix him everything would be alright. But it wasn't until I realized I had to live for myself that we were able to get him help. Now many years later he seems to be doing ok. But since his going off his medication and a death in the family, we've had a hard time connecting. I guess it's little stuff like that I need to strive for while living in the now.
I feel drained. One good thing about daily meditative walks with Spirit is that it renews me and fills me with hope.
All my love to your family,
Jason
*******************************************************
Wed, Sep 22, 2010 at 3:00 PM
To: Jason, from Elisa
Dang, you should serious write a book with all this stuff. I can probably hook you up with a publisher! Why not post it on your blog? I think your readers would love it!!! The more we spread this, the faster we spread spiritual awakening across the world.
Hi back my son!
Mom #2
************************************************************************
Wed, Sep 22, 2010 at 10:19 AM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Hi mom!,
Morning Elisa.
Hope you all were able to get some sleep last night. I can only imagine how hard it must be. Solace and consolation, peace and love unattainable. My mom goes through that too with her husband and I feel totally helpless. My thoughts were with you guys all day and night. I felt Erik with me off an on though out the day until 5ish. Then again late at night before bed. Here are my journal entries for the past couple days. Normally I'd post this stuff on my blog but it's still kinda personal and involves Erik...
Just holler if I get out of line.
9/20/10 10:30-11:30am--
lunch time walk. Interesting to note, On this walk, Erik took the role my main guide has always taken in the past as teacher. But all 3 of them were there. Erik did all the talking. For a whole hour. Teaching, communication, and banter. He even took me to task once, and then he told me he loved me and then on the way back made lewd jokes.(not in a mean way, but it pertained to myself and in another instance a family joke) Sooo surreal. If there's one thing about spirit communication that blows my mind every single time, is their sense of humor. Spirits are just people too. Although their motivations and feelings behind their personality may changed and now come from a new and unfamiliar perspective, they are the same as us.
I was just thinking about this and wondering why, if Erik has progressed; why does he still have a potty mouth? Erik pipes in with, "What!, just because I moved up doesn't mean I stop being me, It's not like I am some ascended being." *(to the average person this would indicate he swears a lot. That's not the case at all-when he talks to me, it's just that I have this expectation of dignified holier than ME spirituality from Spirits. And that's not the case with Erik. He's like you and me, and sometimes a 'beep' slips out, or a lewd joking image crosses my mental path and we laugh).
9/21/10--
Early .am-- Last night was pretty intense for me. I am not quite sure where to start. I wrote to Elisa about someone I briefly channeled in relation to the blog; And it was really weird new and strange. And I can't be certain it was actually happening. Everything over the past week has been quite new to me.
After that, later in the evening after meditation, prayer and meeting with my guides, I felt bombarded with spirit movement and sight. And I confess I was too scared to try to check in and figure out what was going on. I also kept being touched by a spirit or spirits, kinda got the feeling they wanted to talk. I started kinda freaking out. I had to take pills to get to sleep. I was glad I did too. The darkness was virtually rolling with shapes. Erik kept checking on me to see if I was ok.
Throughout that evening and this morning, off and on, I feel this energy on my left side. It feels like I have a fever. The left side of my face, ear, shoulder and elbow joints, and arm feel hot. I am not sure what's going on. I meditate and shield and pray, and connect to my guides and nothing seems amiss. Spinning my shields out I feel someone standing right next to me. My guides and Erik are not saying. Almost as if this is a test. My gut tells me someone is attached to me or next to me. It feels like Erik, but he's not saying why. I am in wait and see mode. I'll post more when I find out.
9/21/10
9-10am
Today is Erik's birthday. A really important day for his family. I am really hope they have some great family moments today filled with love and solace.
I just read online something Kim wrote, "You know, spiritual beings walk a fine line. They want to get our attention, but they don’t want to scare us too badly. To get our attention, they often have to do something a little out of the ordinary—" That is SO TRUE!!! I feel it all the time with every fiber of my being. I now feel that a lot of the frighting experiences I used to have was spirits, was my guides trying to get my atheist apathetic self's attention. And once they got it and I changed; it's now this fine line.
Today, Elisa is supposed to ask Kim about Erik and me. I feel bad cause on one hand this day should just be about Elisa connecting to Erik; but, on the other hand I kinda see this as an opportunity to see if I am crazy or not via a 3rd party. I am so darn nervous and anxious. I am trying as hard as I can to focus on Erik's family and their feelings. Also, I know this is selfish, but If all of this has been just crazy and mental ill on my part, I just want to know and try to get on with life. Uh gosh. that was bad. I just need to stop and take a breather.
You know, since yesterday I've been thinking about how Erik feels to me in my head. It almost feels like he's a parent to me, but not really. I can't figure it out. It's really strange. this feeling. Another thing about Erik that feels weird is how I precieve him in my mind. Feeling spirits for me is akin to remembering a favorite meal from Grandma. It's almost tactile. Remembrance of the Sight, the flavor, the memory of how it smelled and how good it made me feel. Not how it really was or is, but some strange amalgamation of all of it, and then it talks! For example; From a materialist point of view; I don't know him or his family at all. No nothing about them. I don't know what they've done with their lives, what they've experienced, what they talk about, or even what their personalities are like. I should NOT be having anything to do with them. And I feel guilty as heck, even contacting Elisa. Like I am trying to take something from her. I wasn't looking for anything other than to say thank you. But when Erik unexpectedly appeared to me it was akin me falling to the floor with the shock of someone plugging a hole in my soul. I am still trying to figure out why. I don't understand. I keep asking Why me? Erik said, "Why not? Just because you don't think your anyone doesn't mean God thinks that way." I said, 'HUH?!?' He said, "Hey, it's your choice" "It's all about what door your gonna go through".
So bizarre. I keep wondering about the way Erik looks in my mind. It's different than the guides I've never knew in this life time. With them, they just glow bright white and yellow, in a weird mix of features-shadow-light-black and white to color, that fade in and out of clarity of something that looks like a real person to just a disembodied voice. My grandparents on the other hand are like that, but their faces flit back and forth between how I recognized them when they were alive, to what they looked like in their youth, and unrecognized features. Erik is like them, only brighter. Except I never knew him in this life. And the only thing I recognize of him in my mental image as it relates to his photos is his eyes, eyebrows, nose and mouth, and hair. He feels older to me. I never once thought, oh? -a 20 year old. He feels my mental age. Mid 20's-30. (I guess that's near 20). It's just when I read the blog I think teenager. And he's not a teenager in my head. *(but he often acts like one-ha ha ha.)
10:50am--
Just got back from my lunch walk along the river. Here I am sitting in my little cubicle corner at work, quietly going crazy without anyone the wiser. I feel sick to my stomach, my left side has been very warm and buzzing off and on all day. Sometimes, I touch my ear and I think, OMG I have a fever, but it's just my left side! Erik says it's to better connect. A lot of communication happened, a lot of spirit touching, even had a dragon fly zip along side me and up over on the walk.
The talk on my walk; Other than Erik taking me to task for my fear and disbelief; there were 2 important discussions. One: mostly from Roger it was about future vision vs living in the now, choices, opening doors, free will and Two: a message for his family. I could go on and on, but I don't have the time, cause I am at work.
But basically it involved them trying to calm me down, school me on my fear, talking to me about free will and how it affect my choices. For example. I am standing in a room. There are 4 doors. 3 a head of me, and one behind me. If I take the door behind me; while a valid choice-and allowed-it only leads back down to a dark path full of potential pain and suffering. If I take door #1, it will open strait a head to 10 different doors full of possibilities. If I take door #2 it will lead up to 3 doors- full of self enrichment and guidance and healing for others. If I take door #3 it will veer off to the side and lead to 2 doors- fulfilling, but more self centered and not as many opportunities to help others. All are valid choices. God will allow all of them. And some doors will even have emergency exits to get to the other doors. It's up to me, to choose. If it was easy there'd be no point in this life.
The message for the family was kinda personal, but full of love. I was kinda scared to tell them cause it is their special private day. But Erik talked me into it.
9/22 am.
Yesterday Elisa briefly told me that she talked to Kim and Erik in regards to me. When I read what she said I felt like collapsing and sobbing with relief and happiness. I never never ever expected to receive the gift of 'validation of Spirit' from a living person with love. I will never ever doubt again. The entire rest of the day I was grinning like a crazy child. It felt like I was stretched thin with joy. Like I'd found a part of myself that was missing. Like God pulled back the the gingham kitchen curtain and handed me a flower and said, "Here ya go! It's from your garden." Only a garden I couldn't remember having until now. Over and over again, Erik and my guides and a nameless voice kept saying, "REMEMBER- and live in the now", "Remember your promises". All the while, I could feel Erik laughing and laughing in my head and dancing around me huggin me. Head against head, saying, "Seeeee I told you I told you!". As if all that energy build up and silence was an opportunity for the big reveal. It reminds me of the David Cook song, that goes something like, "When you find you, come back to me". I am still having a hard time with why me? This should be about a mom and her son, and their family. I feel a mix of guilt and joy.
I'd like to reply to two things that were mentioned in that email. One was how Kim described Erik visiting me. The visitations in a chair in front of the TV, were precisely correct. No if's and's or but's, totally accurate. The most intense eye-visual activity and mental telepathy happened from last spring to present, in that chair-in front of the tv. Whether it was on or not. The other thing I want to reply to was the whole guardian angel thing. I don't know how I feel about that terminology. Keep in mind every Spiritual system, medium, believer ect. uses different terminology that can mean different things to different people. I certainty don't feel like any kind of angel or guide. I think I must make a pretty crummy angel. I am just me, trying to make sense of it all. Ever since I was a kid, all those job tests they give kids said I should have gone into the clergy or be a vet. And growing up with evangelical parents I was always devastated with the idea that their God didn't want me and said I couldn't help anyone. That there was something wrong with me. I know now that's not true. I feel like I've got to make up for lot time, like I was robbed, and I need to figure out the how's and why's and whats'.
I think the following will be a great challenge for me to work out. I am not interested in future telling, making money, or proving anything. I am interested in how to get closer to God, how to live the life I need to live to help people. I don't want to know the future, I don't want to know what door to step through. I feel I'll be ok.
The hard part for me other than fear and belief; The hard part has not been connecting to Spirit or even channeling, but the hard part is figuring out how to keep living to the best of my ability. To do right by myself, others and God. You know; Knowing what I know; the glimpses I've seen, felt, or read about and yet still go on living in the now. That's hard!
****
Lots of love,
Jason
**********************************************************************************
Tue, Sep 21, 2010 at 3:59 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Hi there!
Just a quick note: I know your super busy, but I just wanted to thank you. I will never doubt again. Really.
I want to send you, Rune, and family lots of love tonight.
I never expected such validation of Spirit to come from a live person with personal love. I guess this is what part of Erik's mission is all about. I am totally overwhelmed with emotion. Thank you!
Lots of Love Jason
****************************************************************
Sep 21, 2010 at 12:52 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
OMG! I am not crazy afterall! --- Crude, I gotta run for my work shift in 10 min. . .. But wow. A very Happy Birthday party indeed!
Luv you all!
********************************************************************************
Tue, Sep 21, 2010 at 12:48 PM
To: Jason, from Elisa
I was definitely up till a little past midnight. So was my husband. I was reading in bed. Hey, guess what! I talked to Erik through Kim and he said he's with you a lot because you two are platonic soulmates and were even twins in the past! He says you two have always been really really close. He likes to hang with you basically to reunite. He's not there to guide or teach. It's like he shows himself sitting in a recliner chair in front of a big screen TV to indicate he likes to "kick back" with you. So whenever he feels the need to kick back, he comes to you. You two are also spiritual equals and Erik says you are a guardian angel on the earthly plane, while he's a guardian angel on the spiritual plane. I'll eventually transcribe everything word for word, but I have a long queue so it might take a while!
Hey, so if you guys are like brothers, I guess that makes me your second mom!!
Love you!
Elisa
***************************************************************************
Tue, Sep 21, 2010 at 11:33 AM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Elisa, I just wanted to wish love and comfort today.
I hesitate to write to you today, cause I feel so intrusive and well, like I am imposing. I've been sitting here agonizing over if I should tell you today or let you have some privacy. And I think you know me well enough by now to know other reasons why I might hesitate to say anything. I make Eric scream out with frustration. He said if he could kick me he would. I saw him in my minds eye kick me in the butt and shove me down on a bean bag chair and snap one hand into his other hand repeadilty in front of my face and say come on! Snap out of it. And I am embarrassed to say I started getting whinny at him. He got mad and turned around and went through a door and slammed it on me. I called out kinda ashamed and asked him to forgive me and he stuck his head back out of the door and stuck his tongue at me. Lydia just growled with a big, "UGH!". He said I didn't have to, but I was missing an opportunity to show love.
I've finally come to the mind set, that even at the risk of it not being real I have to tell you; cause if it is real... I'd be really upset if I didn't tell you.
Over and over again through my lunch walk, Erik wants you and the family to know/ he said: "Tell them, tell them not to be too hard on themselves, because their grief is a part of my lessons here. That without their grief there is no way I could do what I need to here. That there grief is allowing us to connect with people, to improve their lives. Its important. I need the grief to empathize and use that energy to make better connections to people I'd not have been able to reach otherwise." "Tell them that I love them so much."
lots of love and hugs,
Jason
ps. Last night I feel he was threatening me with waking me up at midnight singing happy birthday to Erik; but I was having another freak-out. I'll tell you later...
Anyway I pilled myself to sleep. Just curious if any of you were up at midnight?
****************************************************************
*****************************************************************
Mon, Sep 20, 2010 at 6:23 PM
Elisa, I some times feel sad when I read about so many hurt people who search for answers and they don't get satisfactory answers I wish I could help them. I don't know how. I am too scared of hurt feelings.
I can empathise though, both from a personal point of view and from what I've read about. I've read that guides, loved ones, and angels never abandon us; but, rather sometimes we are not asking the right questions or have the right intentions. Some times those seem cruel, but the thing is; that we don't always know the in's and out's or the why's because it would hamper what lessons we need to learn to improve our souls for the next existence.
Some one once said--on another site; that, "Here you are in the middle of a crisis, another disaster, one failure on top of another, universe smooshing you to the ground, stepped on like a bug on the bottom of the shoe of life. Where is your guidance now?" "Where are my guides, relatives, angels, etc?" "The truth is, your guides do not abandon you. They signed up for this gig knowing there would be challenges and heartache. More likely you’ve either abandoned them, you stopped listening to their advice, or you can’t hear them even though you want to. It is especially during times of crisis or emotional hardship that your guides, relatives, angels, etc try their hardest to send you help. But you’ve got to know what it looks like, sounds like, or feels like or you might miss it."
Again, I read that;
For example. Many mystics and saints (mother Teresa, Joan of arc, etc.etc,) throughout the ages have often said there were periods in life where they felt "God" aka, guides, angles, relatives, Divine/God' abandoned them or when silent. WHY?! No one knows but those in Spirit, but I personally believe there was a reason. I wish I knew something comforting to say or to help.
From a personal perspective there was plenty of times I felt totally abandoned by God, Spirit and family. At the time I was so wrapped up in fear, self loathing, hurt, pain, that I didn't even know I couldn't hear them for that reason. I thought it was the universe out to get me. I felt I was being punished. That I must have done something wrong. But,
What I found out later as time when on, was that I needed to learn to love and accept myself, and THEN, live in the now, day by day for the greater good and self improvement, then only then could I hear Spirit. Also there have been tons and tons of times that I didn't like the reply I got, or how I got it. Many times I've heard super vague replies of "how does knowing that improve you spiritually?" To my ears that sounds cruel and horrible. Especially in the death of a loved one.
I certainly mean NO disrespect. The point I am trying to get across is that: Some times we are not ment to learn the reasons for silence because it would hamper what we need to learn. I am sure many would reply, well sc*w that! I just want to know if they are ok. But spirits are people too, people with purpose, reasons, missions, duties. Sometimes we are not allowed to know. For example. I wanted to know why after communicating with my paternal grandparents, and even a glimmer of my maternal great grand mother. Why not my mom's mom who I dearly loved. Why? Well, at first, I was told she was unavailable. That's it. Not a peep more. (but at the time, I didn't believe in reincarnation). Then when I later believed I was told that she since she had died when we were all so young that she had time to live another life and still meet us in the afterlife when we died. She was crippled most of her life and she wanted another chance to give it a go. Some times communication is weird because they are on missions or have duties you are not to know about for what-ever reason. And some times it is related to an affinity reason. Such as in distant relatives, or in that you both have unresolved issues; Like for me it was letting go bad feelings for myself and my family. Lastly, we all have to keep in mind, that the afterlife does not neccisarily change us. We are still the same people. AND we have to remember that the after life is made of many many many planes of existance. A person with unresolved negitive issues might not be on a plane that would engender happy lovey dovey reconcile with me moments. They may still be wrapped up in issues. I've read so many things that say our issues go with us unless we resolve them now or in the afterlife.
It's just as heart breaking for those who've had communication with those who've not. It's one of my greatest fears that I might tell someone something wrong, misguide, mislead or say the wrong thing. On top of that my fears of them then shunning me, etc, etc,.
Jason
*******************************************************************************
Mon, Sep 20, 2010 at 10:24 AM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Hey Elisa,
Conversation control I'd not thought of that. Cool, Thanks! :)
I do know energy been a problem in the past. Interactions. That's part of why I am currently not "supposed" to be doing any type of trance. Cause of lack of control. They once let George, the spirit boy show me uncontrolled contact during trance and I got physically sick for days. I am also not allowed to do any of that type of thing without "us" setting up an appointment to work, or unless they initiate it. You once asked me, or said to me I should someday teach or show you how I developed or some such. Well, I wish I could say it was my reading Spiritualist texts; But while those were important for the "rules of the road", and to become aware of concepts and ideas; It was my guides that did it all. Literally. For example. I'd read about how to "Talk" or do light/shield work or to meditate; and then try it... and they'd say, "no, that won't work for you. Do this, do that, look here. And they came in my dreams too. They'd all stand around me in my minds eye and tell me what to do. Same with Erik last night, except he's more fun.
I am not quite sure how to explain this. A few times in my blog (I think), I talked about what I call visual transfiguration of reflected surfaces that have a lot of static design. It's a form of an optical illusion related mirror gazing and to what science terms Apophenia: the experience of seeing meaningful patterns or connections in random or meaningless data. Related to Pareidolia, seeing people and faces from background noise. A Spirit guide named Charlie once said, "It's not the shape of the cloud that matters, it's the meaning we take from it." Technically I've been told that spirits alter your brain eye function and your etheric body at the same time to alter your perception. Example: Look at that rock in the rushing water. What do you see? A rock? your reflection? What does the light, shadows and shapes make you think of? What shapes do the patterns and movement make. A rock is a rock except when it's not. What meaning do you take from ordinary experiences?
Well,.. anyway., There is this one framed glass photo I have hanging up, that I've always associated with images of my spirit guides. There are several "people images in it" that I don't recognise yet. It seems like each time I meet a new guide that I associate them with an image in the glass. For about a month or maybe a little more, There is this image of a youth's face; very big, very white, superimposed over and just below my grandparents and below and to the side of my main guide Roger. It just seemed to appear one day. Well over the past few days it's take on more detail. Especially in the eyes. It looks to my minds eye, a deep familiarity with how Erik looks in my head. (minus the hair) The past couple of days almost every time I look at it I do a double take and think, OMG, it's him. It coincides with this gut feeling that Roger stepped up and above into a more "gate-keeper" CEO role,and Erik has been center stage as teacher. I have no idea if that's accurate or not. I only get smiles and "what do you think" from Roger. I've read that guides come and go through out our lives. But Roger assures me he's not going anywhere. That's he will be here my whole life. But it's surreal to say the least.
Almost lunch! Yikes. :)
***************************************************************************
Mon, Sep 20, 2010 at 10:03 AM
To: Jason, from Elisa
He used to do that whole squirting between his teeth to his sisters too! How funny. I'm wondering if he's trying to teach you how to "control" your conversations with spirit guides and that's why he said, "See, that was easy" when you "roped him in." I think he and your guides might want you to learn to be more in charge of the interaction with them? In that case, you have a challenge on your hands with Erik with his high energy level!
Much love, Baby Boy,
Your other mom
************************************************************************
Mon, Sep 20, 2010 at 8:45 AM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Happy Monday! (ugh-yuk-rain) :) It'll be a good day though.
Thank you for the emails. They are really great. Especially the reply about my mom. It's been a real struggle all my life. If it weren't for the tremendous comfort she gets from her faith, I'd be more upset. It's just so hard at times. For example; her husband, when he died this past summer; all she could talk about was him trying to make peace with God. And how she thought his sisters were under satanic influences and how they'd never be together again if they didn't turn to God. And all I could do was bite my tongue from wanting to say, but, but "I SAW him.." There was a big family battle over the remains, and I tried to comfort her saying that they were just upset and letting their selfishness get in the way and that shouldn't judge them because we had no idea what obsessions they were under, no any idea of what they needed to learn from this, nor what their life plans were. She agreed and felt greatly comforted by that, but then turned around and told me she thought one of his sisters must be possessed by the devil. I didn't have the heart to try and explain it was mostly likely just crabby ill mannered angry spirits egging his sister on. Oh well, I just throw my hands up.
Anywhoo. Thanks again. I mean it.
I' have seen some of the photos you posted, but I didn't look to closely yet, cause When reading your blog I was sneaking at work! HA! But, really I love the facebook photos. Especially the family ones. I've even briefly seen a few of the videos. I LUV the one with his niece. I got to tell you though, last week when first hit "play" I quickly shut it down because it freaked me out. His laugh and voice was the same as in my head, and it really startled me. Not all the time mind you, my guides say they use less energy if they don't use a distinct sound, and the sound wont sound as distinct if I am distracted or letting my mind run amuk.
I meant to save this up to write to you later, but since I am replying I'll just go a head with another Erik story.
Last night after I wrote to you I was so wound up and overwhelmed that I was shaking and pacing about. So I went to the kitchen and was debating cereal again. Special K or junk. And of course, Erik pipes in with Marshmallows. I did an, "OMG". and he laughs and as I go back in the living room with the healthy stuff; He shows me this mental image of him 'spooning marshmallow creme into his mouth and the squirting it between his teeth and then trying to talk!' I was flabbergasted! And said something like, omg, that's so disgusting... And then he said, Got any whip cream?!"
Then I tried to watch some Stargate reruns and couldn't cause I couldn't stop letting my mind run amuk. And Lydia took that opportunity to work with me some on energy merging. Then Erik joined in and was helping. He came in the room and I saw his shimmer phase in and out around the room and he started saying, "Marco.... Polo". And wanted me to try and find him. Then I closed my eyes and we took it back to a 'mind's eye' excersise and I tried to envelop him in energy as he flew around me while spinning a shield. Basically like tossing a net over someone running around you. And if I succeeded, it would draw the spirit right next to you for better communication, while holding others outside your shield. Then when I did it; He plopped down next to me on the chair (he was sitting "IN" the arm of the chair!--totally weird!) and he put his arm around me and hugged me and said, seee- it was easy wasn't it! And during that moment my entire left side from waist up was enveloped with heat, warm tingling pressure. Oh, he also hugged me in the kitchen when I was freaking out. Except before he did he danced around in front of me trying to get my attention. (his shimmer form). I was really freaking out.
You know; every time a Spirit has touched me, each individual has a different area they tend to touch and they each feel different. Like Erik; He's the only one Iv'e felt heat from. So interesting... Oh, and another thing. The few times I've experienced energy merges, it was always on my left side. I should try to dig up some reading material on that sometime.
I had a really hard time getting to sleep. Every time I closed my eyes I kept seeing face fly around me, all different sizes and types and levels of clarity. Not scary, just weird. Every now and then my guides would say shield. It eventually started to freak me out and Erik kept stopping by and sitting on my bed asking if I was ok, and telling me it would all be all right that's "they'd let no harm come to me" and to just close my eyes and go to sleep. I kinda felt like at one point while sitting there he had his hand on my ankle so long it started to ache. So that he moved and apologised. I finally had to pray for sleep cause I was exhausted. This morning, my guides said that the images were because I didn't shut down my chakras and and shield before sleep.
Okkkk..Back to work for me then.
Talk to ya Later!
Hugs!
Jason
***********************************************************************************
Sun, Sep 19, 2010 at 9:30 PM
To: Jason, from Elisa
I'm sorry, Jason, but you can't make stuff like this up! Of course it's real. The emotion behind your vision even I can feel. It's almost so real it's solid!
Erik, btw, can be solemn at times when he tries to comfort people. Then, he's very quiet and warm and caring in his demeanor. When you get too serious about yourself and life, then he tends to joke around. He's a big hugger too.
I think he may be spending a lot of time with me in preparation for his birthday. I think he knows it's going to be a tough one. But after that, I'm sure he'll be back to haunt you!
Have you seen that photo of Erik on the balcony at Destin with his crazy hair and me sitting to his right smiling at his antics? That's what I see sometimes when his head pops into my mind.
xo
Elisa
**************************************************************
Sun, Sep 19, 2010 at 7:38 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
As I promised here is the email I said I'd send you. I am gonna chill for a few days and try to gather myself. I need to touch base with Spirit and figure out where I am. I have no idea how I am going to relate any of this, from the past few days, online. It's all been so deeply personal, and intimate/private, and moving; Right now I am thinking I am only going to paraphrase it, generalize it on my website. I dunno..This; the past several days. Heck, everything this past summer. It's been major. It's effecting me as much as my sleep paralysis episodes have. Only now, it's not terrifying. It's my #1 priority to do right by God, and others. I am kinda overwhelmed.
9/19/2010L 6:04pm--
Returned from trip up north a couple of hours ago. Visit w/ family. No new babbies though. They told my sister in law a few more days. (any time). It was a great trip. Fall in-----------.
Erik was fairly quiet the trip but did make a few very brief visits. I'd like to relate 3 experiences. -What Erik said (of course); -my experiences with a possible vision; -my experience with possible visions regarding my very pregnant sister-in-law.
1) Before I left on our trip. As I told you over cell phone text, while waiting for my spouse to come home I saw that shimmering fuzzy static motion appear and approach my left side. I feel that Erik may have came and hugged me and touched my arm and head because all of a sudden I felt this super warm tingling envelop my arm and head, and in a hushed voice told me Brian had passed. I wasn't sure if it was really Erik or not because his voice was so sad. And I wasn't sure if I was just guessing from what you last told me or not, or self projecting. Around 10pm I turned on my phone and checked your facebook page and saw your post, and now feel it really was Erik.
I remember shortly after that I was just totally freaked out! I said to myself, "Is this real?!", "sometimes I just don't believe all this". Then a mental image of Erik appeared in my minds eye in front of me and he appears hunched over and shuffles around the living room holding a pointy stick and starts gruting,.. mmmm.mmmm... That is why you fail, there is no try, only do or do not.... (Like YODA!). And then he jumps up laughing and pops away... All I could think was OMG, I am totally loosing it. That's when I asked my guides about Brian. I was simply told he was met by family and had healing to do. I have no idea what that ment. I asked for details and was told it was not my place, and improper to pry. Everyone had their journey and I had mine.
I went to bed praying for Erik, Brian, and You, and everyone else I often do. Nothing else happened. I slept pretty good.
On the road up north Erik was either absent or pretty silent. I mean, when I thought about him I would visualize this guy, his head with messy hair (only his head) kinda appear out of this mist and smile at me. Which leads to the 2nd part.
2) On the trip up, I rode in the passenger seat for the 2nd hour. I closed my eyes and did my usual prayers, meditation etc to connect to spirit. Since the night before I'd been praying for Brian a lot. That'd he'd be ok. That he'd find healing and support he needed, that God guide him to where he needed to be. I prayed for you and Erik. Then as I sat there eyes closed trying to send love Brian's way; I feel my guides showed me a vision. I have to give the disclaimer that I have no proof or details that it was about Brian, or real. Only that I was in pretty deep prayer, and thinking about Brian and I got the following mental image. I could have totally self projected it, and be totally bonkers, but what gives me pause is that there was such intense emotion with it. It's mostly symbolic, in that I don't know who the people are in it, but it happened like I was watching a movie or a stage play through a thin white curtain or mist.
In the vision, I was in a huge black/dark void. But not scary. Just nothingness. Kinda like a hall. But I couldn't see any edges, walls, or anything. But all of a sudden I saw two men carrying a man in. One man was carrying him by the arms, and the other by the feet. The man looked sick and passed out. I saw no facial features, only while clothes. They carried him to center stage. At center stage was a large group of people in a semi circle. There must have been 20-30 of them. All of them glowed with a soft while light. No features, just light. But I could tell that there was both men and women, short and tall. In the center of the semi circle was an older lady with a grey pony tail sitting in a chair or wheel chair. I couldn't tell, but I thought wheel chair, that was strange. And then the 2 men carried the man to the woman, and put him in her lap. They then starred at each others face and and he broke down in sobbs. Wracking sobbs. And she stroked his head. All I could feel was this "intense, vivid" emotion of love radiating from the group. It was almost heart wrenching. And from the man was this intense shock, relief, and pain. And this overwhelming female love from the woman. Acceptance and reassurance and love. Then it all faded away.
I mean, it was all soooo different than anything I've ever felt or thought of before. I really don't know if it was real. or what, but All weekend Iv'e had this over whelming urge to tell you.
I've got one more thing to write up and share with you tonight. I hope this is all OK. The next letter is mostly about my sister-in-law, but I feel Erik did say something that involves the both of us and Brian.
*****************************************************************
Sun, Sep 19, 2010 at 9:20 PM
To: Jason, from Elisa
Oh, poor thing. I'd hate to believe what your mom believes! But you know, people like that cannot be converted.
Later, little devil child!
Elisa
***********************************************************
Sun, Sep 19, 2010 at 7:36 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Oh, Good. I was so scarred there for a moment. Thank you for your support. It is such a relief to have another real person that actually believes me. I wish I could tell my mom. She loves me, but thinks all things not of "Jesus" is of the devil. She's one of those who thinks we lay in the dirt till the 2nd coming and then it's all angels and singing. Maybe that's unfair. no, prob. is. .. Another thing I have to work on.
Ok, 2 more emails tonight.
************************************************************************************
Sun, Sep 19, 2010 at 7:01 PM
To: Jason, from Elisa
Sweetie, you don't have to have public exposure. You can even email the producers your story and not appear on the show. They know how to respect privacy. Or you don't have to do anything at all. You can keep this all between you and I. If Erik and I help just one person in this world, that's fine with me. I hate the limelight too. I NEVER want to be famous--NEVER!
Oh, I just wanted to tell you that I plan on asking more about Erik and you through Kim O'Neill on the 21st! I'll email you the summary, okay?
I'm grateful to have found you. Nothing can screw up our new friendship. I feel like you're a son to me, so if you ever, ever need to talk, keep my numbers handy. ----------------------------------------
I hope I didn't offend YOU with MY email. Let me know if I can help you in any way!!! (Plus, send over your adoption papers when you get the chance.)
xo
Elisa
**********************************************************************
Sun, Sep 19, 2010 at 6:41 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Oh, Gosh! I was just sitting down to write to you a couple of experiences this weekend and saw this email. I will send you that email tonight
But,
I don't think I feel very comfortable with being known in a public fashion yet. Although You can consider this permission in writing to do anything you wish with anything I say or write. I trust you as I trust my own mother. This is a super private thing for me that only started snowballing for me this year. My spouse doesn't know about any of this. He thinks all things paranormal is crazy!., nor does anyone in my family know. There are only 7 people other than you that know anything about me, and 3 of them are overseas. (Meaning people I've had conversations with). I mean "This whole thing" (have you read any more of my website or journal?) All of it still overwhelms me, that sometimes I wonder.... I am sure you can relate with living in the south and the friends you've had in life. The first 15 years of my life I was raised by an extremely strict religeous family. Then my folks got into a horrible divorce; and at the same time dealing with being gay in that environment. And then moving across country. The last thing I'd want to do is upset my family.
Only a just a little bit ago I came through another very personal spiritual crisis. I don't even know if I can tell you yet cause I am so embarrassed about some of it and then this all happened with the Erik blog. All weekend I've just been feeling kinda overwhelmed. You know maybe down the road, when I reach a point I can share this with my spouse I'd feel differently. Right now I am just struggling with accepting that all this oh so very real to me. And I feel like I need to get to a point in my confidence and development that I can go to my spouse with "Proof", not risking home and family.
Before I "met" Erik, I was on a journey of self improvement so that down the road, I would have the moral compass to successfully explore 'physical mediumship'. Great ups and downs. Then I met you both. It's all very scary right now.
I hope you can forgive me and your not too upset. I understand if you don't want to hear from me again. Let me know if I should back off. The last thing I want to do is cause pain or hamper anyone.
Luv Jason
ps. Please feel free to use anything I've said, written via email or website or my journal as you wish. I've made a vow to never seek profit in any fashion from any of this, just omit my last name if you do. :)
*********************************************************
Sun, Sep 19, 2010 at 11:54 AM
To: Jason, from Elisa
Hey Jason,
Would you be willing to share your "Erik experience" on Oprah? It would be a wonderful way to help bring spiritual awakening to a larger public, and I'm sure she would pay for all travel and lodging expenses. If so, would you mind sharing a bit of the experience with her producers on the link below?
https://www.oprah.com/ownshow/plug_form.html?plug_id=216
Thanks,
Elisa and Erik
****************************************************************
Sun, Sep 19, 2010 at 8:49 PM
To: Jason, from Elisa
Gosh, you're so gifted! I hope you eventually tell yourself: "This shit is real and I'm not going to need outside approval or permission for me to know it's real." It is, Jason. I do feel Erik hugging my husband and I as we hug, which we did several times today. As for the baby, they say the baby's spirit usually goes in and out of the body, some don't go in until birth, and then they hang out in the other dimension more than they are in the body. That's why newborns sleep so much. It's very hard for an expansive soul to cram itself into that little prison, I'm told.
I hope one day you can teach me and others how you develop your gift.
Oh, and also, I often feel Erik is hanging out in our room when we sleep. I think sometimes he hangs out with Michelle at her apartment, sometimes in our upstairs bedroom.
Night night!
Elisa
**************************************************************
Sun, Sep 19, 2010 at 8:35 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Elisa, Last one tonight:
So, during the same car trip, on the way up north. Right after I had that vision, after I kinda sat there overwhelmed about what I just saw, imagined, I dunno. I just kept right on praying. And I then finished with that and then started talking to my guide Lydia. She had wanted to teach me how to connect with my unborn nephews guides.
She was showing me how to approach my sister in law, and use mental exercises imaging light, shielding and meditative thought to reach out and attempt to visually see with my eyes and mind. First was to ask God to help with guidance. And if it was his will to meet with the baby's guides, in what ever fashion he deemed fit. Then I was to try to expand my energy and shield out in a constant musical motion, spiral it outward to envelope the mom and baby, and that if I saw any other spirits like a guide, the baby, or Erik to bring the energy around them. In my minds eye that looks like a crackling tesla coil of energy and yellow mist that moves like a water spurt and cloud with tendrils and winds around and around my body to form a solid sheet. Weird I know, but that's what it looks like in my minds eye. Maybe it's all bull, but Every time I meditate and visualize energy and light work; it looks like that.
Anyhooo...
So I was practicing this while listening to Lydia. She and Roger were demonstrating for me. When I suddenly visualized my sister-in-law in the middle of them. I saw the fetus superimposed on her, where the womb is. And then, I saw a plasmic, misty outline of an old woman with flowing white hair appear above the baby. She smiled at the baby and me. Then a very large Indian woman appeared next to them out of the darkness, dressed in furs. A stocky middle age man in suspenders, And then a very tall balding man with combed over hair and glasses and a suit stepped into view. Then they all faded away.
So, then, that was it for the car. When we got to -----------------------,
When we got there. Nothing from Erik btw./ When we got there we did the usual family junk. But while at the new parents house; I tried it out. You know/ the only "Auras" I've ever seen (or imagined) was on pregnant women. I have no idea why. But on one occasion saw a fuzzy gray, haze outlining them, that was tinged with yellow. On my sister in law it seemed purple. I did see someone walking around, but I have no idea who and it was very brief.
That night, at my mother in laws house, after dinner, I saw something unusual. You know I described how I see spirits, and it looks like a shimmering fuzz or static. Well I saw this shimmering haze, around her belly! Now I am reaching for a description, but to me it looked like as though there was spirit matter surrounding just that area. I have no idea what that means. Was that the baby's spirit not fully incorporated with the body yet? or the combination of two energies occupying the same space? I have no clue.
Oh, and she said since she's been pregnant she's not had any nightmares. And I was talking to my mother in law and kinda round about asked her what her parents looked like. And they totally matched the car vision of the woman I saw in my mind with the white hair. I had never seen a photo of them before nor asked before. Long since dead. And the Indian woman; I explain that because my spouse and his brother (father)'s -- the baby's great Grandmother, was Ojibwa. I suspect the other man is a grandfather and the tall man I have no idea.
Ok so on to the next bit.
I like going to bed early when I can, so I went up at 9:30-10:30 ( I don't recall the exact time) and started praying for Brian again. When all of a sudden I feel like I saw Erik shimmer in. And he started saying over and over again, "He heard you, he heard you, he heard you, Brian heard all your guy'z prayers! You and Mom, & everyone.
So on a personal note. It was very real to me. If anyone asks, I am convinced prayers for the departed as always heard and beneficial. I got the same kinda feeling, but not as strong when I prayed for my mom's recently departed husband. I mean. I never felt like I got much validation or emotional response in that situation. I just have this gut feeling that Erik was really there. And waiting for Brian like my guide said. That Brian undergoing some kind of mental, emotional and physical healing before moving to a place he could interact with him. I really don't know. All I know for sure is what I told you. I guess I am just trusting God that it is real and will all be ok. I have to or go bonkers over the edge. I once read that the greatest thing you can do to help the spirit world and said interaction there of is acknowledgment. So, I can't promise you that was all real. But I believe it was and it holds a great deal of meaning for me.
Lots of love,
Jason
ps. When you and your husband hug standing up (I see hall way or corridor) did you ever feel like maybe Erik was hugging the both of you together? Cause I got that image a few times in my head this weekend. I also got the image of him with you all night while sleeping just to be with you. Don't know if that is self projecting or not; but I've gotten those images pretty strong several times.
pps. Ok, thanks for listening. I am off to bed. I think I've got a busy week ahead of me. I promised my guides I'd get some real work on my job done for a change (so far behind), and try to finish reading those Allan Kardec books. (you know, the mediums book, etc). ---Hugs!
******************************************************************************
Sept. 17, 2010 am
Journal entry
An interesting side note on how spirits can look:
As soon as I made the decision to contact Elisa. My guide appeard to me in my minds eye in glowing white robes with gold designs on them. I take it this is a way of stressing the importance of what they are about to say. They said that now that I've gone down this road, there should be no turning back. Not that I can't, but shouldn't. That I must keep my commitment to them and God, that to fail would be unfair, and devistating to all involved. That it is imparative that I do right by them. That it is no casual thing. I promised I would and they faded back into the background and their old clothes. Erik ever protective of his mom, said, "you'll do right by her". I assured him I would. He think's I'll do fine and be ok.
My guides continued to repeat such things, and "remember your promises, don't forget"
I am sort of floored by such a relevation. I dont' know what to think. I don't quite know what this all means or it's ramifications, or where I am going with all this. I am sure I'll make mistakes and take paths I shouldn't but I'll try hard to do right by people. Sobbering indeed...
********************************************************************************
Fri, Sep 17, 2010 at 7:33 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
So sorry to hear about Brian, I am so sorry to hear you had to go through that. I am praying for him, and your family!
ps. You are right about Erik on a higher level. He's right. In fact when he first came to me he seemed on a much higher plane than my grandparents. He was brighter and less dense than them, he kinda glows with a yellow/white light, and he has great vocal/mental clarity in coversation. Almost the same as my main guide. My grandparents are not like that at all. They seem more dense, a bit darker, and I've not been able to communicate as well telepathically with them. It may be an affinity thing, or relating to certain "positions" guides take with different duites. I am not sure. He's right about another thing. I am a total noob! I am well read, but have a long long way to go.
I am just really grateful I met him and you.
My prayers to you
********************************************************************************
Fri, Sep 17, 2010 at 5:43 PM
To: Elisa, from jason
I almost forgot!
Erik just hollered at me, "Your such a 'noob' (newbie)!
I was having food debates with him today. Once at lunch, I was walking and my guides kept telling me I should eat healthy, (raisins and juice and nuts). Erik kept piping in saying, no! Dude, Chipotle! Go for the tacos!
Then later one the way home I was ticking off the days on my fingers till his birthday, and I said 4 more days Erik, what do you want? He said, "CAKE!" and I said , what kind? and he said, "FROSTING!"
Then tonight, I was wondering what to eat for dinner and I thought, spinach and tomatoes, and he said, " Go for the Marshmallow cereal"
wow. I can't believe I almost forgot. I am gonna start keeping an Erik Journal just for you so I don't have to keep writing like this. I'll just save them up and then send em your way after I get a few. That is if he sticks around. I certainly dont' expect it. But I have a feeling that he be in and out of my life from time to time for a while. I'll let you know. I'll put anything he says in itallics
~Jason
*****************************************************************************
Fri, Sep 17, 2010 at 6:10 PM
To: Jason from Elisa
Yep, he loved spicy food, especially Mexican food. Marshmallow Rice Krispy Treats was a huge staple for him as were all sweets, including cake. I asked him what he wanted for his birthday and he said "cake." Same answer he gave you! I think he was probably standing on his head when he learned about the food pyramid in class.
xo
Elisa
***************************************************
Fri, Sep 17, 2010 at 6:04 PM
To: Jason, from Elisa
Poor you! Will he ever leave you alone?? (lol) Actually, he was right. I was very busy around that time because I got a call from a neighbor of one of my dearest friends, Brian. He's a sweet man---------(private text omited)------------The neighbor found him ------(collapsed)------. He had fallen--------------. Did CPR, ------------------- CPR again on him. I've been super busy crying, trying to find his next of kin (nearly everyone in his family has passed on)-----------------So yes, he knew I was busy. In fact, he popped in to say hello while I was walking down the hall from the ICU.
The outfit you describe: Erik wore those kind of shirts and loved baseball caps. His favorite was a red one with some white as well. He also loved to wear very baggy gray sweats, so all of this is incredible! It makes me so happy!
Last session he said he had just graduated to a higher level. He says it's like going from one school grade to another, and he mentioned something about doing some guide work I think. But I'll have to see when I transcribe the session. He says it's really cool in the new level. The grass is purple he says.
xo
Elisa
****************************************************
Fri, Sep 17, 2010 at 5:20 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Elisa, Jason here: I am actually now leaving tomorrow morning. Last night I thought I was leaving right after work today. And, when I emailed you this morning I thought I was done with Erik until the weekend was over. But he's been with me off an on all day, and I feel compelled to write you. I didn't really have faith that anything else would happen before the weekend was out. But Erik is here right now.
9/17/2010: Misc. observations and conversation w/ Erik since 9/16 --am.
*Side note. So far he's around a lot. He's been popping in and out all day. While I am at my desk at work, while I walk, on the bus, at home. I think he thinks I am a hard luck case, or a challenge. He said "he'd be here even if I said go away; cause I need him. That my guides were ecstatic when the opportunity came up to meet him cause he's a "knuckle cracker and good with tuff cases". That's his job now." His words not mine.
I keep asking him "Is this real?!" And he says the funniest sarcastic things. Like this morning he shows me him with a sheet over his head and rattling big chains making WOOO WOOO sounds, and laughing saying"IS tHIS REAL>.. IS THIS REALL... WOOOO WOOO>..." Other times, he blows out his lips and makes that flopping raspberry sound or groan-rolling his eyes... or MY Favorite, the "Ugh, roll eyes.. "DUH..."
-Fri. morning:-- Erik is waiting for me when I wake up. I am kinda startled. I talked a bit about what he said earlier in a post. But what I didn't didn't mention yet is the banter. I said to him on my way downstairs, Oh gheeseh, can you please announce your self. Then he puts this image in my head of him holding a huge drum strapped to him and him marching around me like a marching band, "here I am, here I am!" "Hellloooo,,, Heloo!!!"..
-Fri. 10:30 am. On my walk during work break, my guides Lydia and Roger gave me a mental tutorial on how to better connect with Erik. This involved a mental exercises. I have every intention of going into further depth of such things on my blog at a later point. But basically Erik is what they call a walk in, or walk by. Normal they, my guides are the gate keepers to my connection to Spirit. Some of them are responsible for protection, some for connection, some for shielding, some for energy, ect. Because Erik so--far hasn't scheduled time with them. When he comes by he flashes energy pretty brightly. This in loose terms opens the etheric cloud surrounding this Plane. The opening are pretty close to the lower Planes and extra shielding is needed to keep off unwanted visitors/spirits. (There are many many levels/layers in the afterlife planes.) They showed me mental ways of using light, music and energy to mesh with His so that I am ok. It's easier on everybody energy wise. (Again, I know this is weird; but for those who've read a lot on the various methods of mediumship it kinda makes sense. There are actually lots of different techniques depending on your belief system).Any whoo.... Lydia suggested to me to use classical music in my head, cause it would annoy Erik. And then he suggested RAP. And then she shuddered, he laughed and they both took off. I am paraphrasing-- a lot more went on, but that was the gist.
-Fri. after noon 3:00pm-3:30pm teasing--- I was bad today. I slipped out of work early. Erik pops in and says, "whooo your BUS_TID!" "Skippin out on work!" My guide Lydia phases in and rolls her eyes at him and gives me the "Look", and says, "as if you were gonna get anything done anyway. Remember we have work to do tonight.(meaning I told her I'd meet with her to talk about channeling before my trip up north). Anyways, Erik was poking at me on the walk to the bus stop. I said, Shouldn't you be with you mom? He said, "Na she's busy". I don't remember what I said next or him, but it was teasing banter about his antics. I said something about; "Aren't you supposed to be an old soul?" He then gives me this goofey obnoxious image of him puffed up like a smug politician. Kinda like he was posing for all the world to see, holding his 'suit lapels'. I then said to him, If your so old and wise you should loose a few teeth in that pretty face of yours!! and he laughed and showed himself as an old geezer with a beard and missing teeth--stuck his fingers in his mouth and stuck his tongue at me!!! ANd then he popped back to normal and picked at my hair and said, "At least I don't have gray hair!!" And then he ran up to me and in my minds eye hugged me and called me an old lady! and sat in my lap and yelled MOM!--arms around me, howling with laughter. Then he took off again. It was all I could do to keep walking and no look like a laughing grinning crazy person.
--On the bus home 3:30-4pm. I showed him a mental image of him in a graduation cap and gown and then a blue button up shirt and slacks, asked him why he never appears to me in more formal way. He said, GAGH! I hate that outfit! Then promptly flashed an image of him in a baseball looking shirt, white, with colored sleeves, gray sweat pants and bunched up wool sock and a red baseball cap. He then grabbed the cap and turned it around backwards and said, "It goes this way" and then made a face at me.
9/17--4:14pm. I just said to him, "Shouldn't you be with your mom right now?" He replies with, "Naaa, naaa she's busy". I said to him, " surely there is someone who needs you more right now". He said, "YOU ALLL are my business now." I am here to help you remember what I've said today so you can tell my mom.
I need to tell you something else.
Last night,
I offered to God, my guides and Erik that if he needed energy to heal with or be with his mom, that he could use some of mine. He told me, "No-way, I would be in soooo much trouble with your guides. No worries, God will give me extra energy to handle it."
I have some personal insight into that. Your well read, I am sure you've heard this before. In my reading and feelings; there are several ways spirits and use energy. 1) Use ours-share it 2) Use their own 3) Use divine energy 4) Use physical and elemental sources ie. electrical, magnetic
In my reading, it's my understanding that the higher level spirits almost always use their own energy. This is a learning tool for them and relates to lesions and experiences they need to learn and have in the afterlife to evolve to yet even higher levels or planes of existence. And that when they really need it, God provides the power for them in their work.
That the highest beings in the highest levels almost always use Divine energy. The lower you get in the astral planes the more often spirits will use environmental energy.
To manipulate environmental energy-- mid range to higher spirits use their own personal energy, therefore it can take a lot out on them. That's why they so often appear in your dreams or mentally rather than physical manifestations.
I just thought you might like to know what he said to me. He is defiantly on a mission, a purpose. I'd be curious to talk to him in say 20 years to see what he has to say about growing closer to God. And how we can use that insight into our journey here on earth. I dunno maybe we aren't meant to know that. Maybe he's only here for rescue work. I can't wait to find out!
ps.-- you and Erik are point on correct about gblt people. A big lesson I learned in this life was self love, forgiveness, and compassion. I have a sneaky feeling I've got spirit work in my 'afterlife-future'. I dunno. You know those things are so fuzzy.
pps. --Eriks energy has manifested twice now as a super brief flash of a blue and white plasmic rod in my peripheral vision.
Hugs!
******************************************************************
Fri, Sep 17, 2010 at 9:11 AM
To: Jason, From Elisa
This is all so amazing and hilarious. He has shared many insightful things about gays and transgenders like why they chose such an orientation, what many of them are here to teach, etc. I believe that many gays are here to teach the collective consciousness about unconditional love and to help bring spiritual awakening to the world. All of my friends who are gay/lesbian are, as a general rule, highly evolved and enlightened, very loving, etc. What's your take. Have you read this entry where he talks about gays? I hope you enjoy your visit. Be careful if you're driving and kiss the baby for Erik and I. Next time you see him, remind him that i love him. His birthday (21st) is on Tuesday 9/21.
xo
Elisa
*********************************************************************
Fri, Sep 17, 2010 at 8:23 AM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Jason here again: before I leave for my trip-- one more journal entry:
Some of what I omitted on 9/16/2010 conversation w/ Erik: I said, what's with the crazy hair? He said, "I thought you said it was cute?!" Then he started singing, "so you think I am sexy". I was truly appalled! he then showed me him rolling on the floor laughing so hard he was holding himself! (ps. yes I am gay; I've got a long term partner- years- in a healthy relationship-we are actually rather conservative, very average old school American people).
Before bed while I was siting on the couch waiting for my spouse to come home from the late shift at work. After my last email to Elisa; Erik popped into my field of vision in that moving static way I see some spirits, and I watched as it bounced up to me. (it was pretty surreal because he walked through the end table and leaned against the arm of the couch right next to me, and leaned over and said in my head) "So, wh'd ya think of mom?" Then he hopped up and laughed as he walked away. And, on the way out said, "she got ur message."
A bit later at 10:20pm; I said to myself, Oh my gosh I am going to have to take a pill to sleep. Erik said in my head, "Wha....?, No U don't need em! You miss out on too much that way!"
9/17/2010
What he's referring to is that quite often of late I've been taking them to avoid channeling spirits and lucid dreaming out of fear. Some of my past experiences I found pretty scary because I didn't know what was happening at the time. But even though I know what's going on now; at times sensing spirit can be pretty overwhelming. When I was taking pills to kill my sensing my guides and spirits I was missing out on teaching opportunities and communication. And you know Erik is right! He really put me at ease and laugh. It was good, because I was able to lay in the dark and watch the movement and energy for the first time in a very long time without fear.
Well,.. I was kinda hoping that I'd have a lucid dream last night, but I didn't. I slept pretty good. I've an appointment with my guides today and tonight to work out a plan and be taught to connect with my 'to be soon born' nephew's guides. When I woke up this morning with the disappointment, Erik said in my head, no dream cause he was with mom. And my guides just said, that I just need to be patient and wait. All things in time on Gods schedule not mine.
Sooo... That's that. I am still feeling in shock and overwhelmed by it all. Oh, no wait, on the bus this morning, Erik told me he hopes I have the same kind of relationship with my new nephew that he has with his niece. I am going to keep that in my mind while I am packing to go up north for the weekend!
Hugs!
**************************************************************
Thu, Sep 16, 2010 at 10:02 PM
To: Elisa, From Jason
omg. I was on the phone to my mom just now and i saw erik pop in front of me just now bouncing. I said hi an he said just waving hi. check ur email. ... and started laughing. .. best. lots of luv! I'm replying on my mobile.
----------
Sent from the network using Mobile Email
*******************************************************************
Thu, Sep 16, 2010 at 9:08 PM
To: Jason, from Elisa
This is so awesome. The snickering, eye rolling, the language, it's all very him. And btw, I bet he said "ew gross" because he can't stand salad of any sort! It probably had nothing to do with your manners. Yep, he just popped into my mind and said, "exactly." He uses that word alot (exactly) to answer the affirmative, just like Roger did with you. When you get back home, let me know. I want you to friend Robert on facebook. He's the other guy who Erik "haunts." They have a great time together. Erik adores him. He even teases him (lovingly) but Robert teases him right back about not having any legs and arms and stuff. Robert tells him not to peek when he's taking a shower and Erik says, "You wish!" ANyway, I met Robert the other day and he's such a good soul, as are you.
I look forward to being able to carry one a more tangible relationship with him, but I'm sure that will take time as my grief lifts and my energy vibrations rise. Plus, with such an active family and job, it's hard to quieten the mind chatter.
That buzzing warm feeling is exactly how he contacts me by touch. Plus there's a feeling of intense goosebumps. Sometimes he'll just do that with my middle finger as a joke. He had a very irreverent sense of humor and loved to curse here and there.
I'm sure he was saving his energy for me, because he was very very active with his visits here at that time. More than he ever has been before. Recently, he sat with my sister, Laura on her back porch and talked to her about God and about time. He said that time over there is very different than it is on the earthly plane. What seems like 15 minutes to a spirit seems like a flash to us humans. He said that's why we get the impression that they're two places at once when they're really not. They seem omnipresent but they're not.
Thanks for letting me post this. I'll leave off the last name, of course. I never ever use those and if you wish, I can change your name completely.
xo
Elisa
********************************************************
Thu, Sep 16, 2010 at 8:27 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason
Oh! I am so glad you are OK with this, I was actually shaking so much reading your email on my phone that I had to go turn on my computer so I could read. So much has been going on today I feel like I don't even know where or how to start.
Erik is so unlike my guides I've met so far. Those would be Roger (my spirit guide), George (a spirit who appears to me as a child, who is Rogers student. he is learning from both of us), and Lydia ( a recently revealed to me-a teacher), and my paternal grandparents. They are the only ones I've ever had telepathic communication with until Erik. I've encountered 'others' but not with speech. And those others were a part of lessons, not people to communicate with. That's why when Erik showed up I was so surprised so shocked. I totally doubted it, over and over again. I agonized whether or not to write to you. I sat at my desk with the email open for the better part of the afternoon. It was a last minute decision to hit send as I ran off to the bus stop. Erik kept saying over and over again, "just send it, she'll be cool!" But I kept replying that I'd be mortified if I was wrong. Of course that only solicited huffs, groans, and eye rolling from the peanut gallery! I tried to get him to give me a stronger physical sign as to whether or not I should send it to you. He said he needed to save his energy for you.
It was Roger my guide who convinced me to send it. As in the past he basically said; "There comes a time, when you have to just surrender to God, trust in yourself, trust in your spirit team. If your wrong, you figure out what you should learn, if you're right you enrich yourself and others spiritually. In the end, either this is real-- or your a loon with multiple personalities--but, since you live a successful normal happy life.. in the end, it will come down to ' where you brave enough to open that door'.
The whole bus ride home, I kept getting flashes of a messy haired boy humming to himself and snickering. Then when I got home I rushed about to get ready for my trip. I had to get it done because I had an appointment with my spirit team to connect with them when I got home from work. Also, Trying to make sure I did everything on my list. Let me back up.
(when I see spirits outside of my minds eye or lucid dreaming-- they appear as shimmering transparent fuzzy static. Sometimes they are full figured people shapes, other times, just limbs, or torso combination's or orb movement or shape movement. I've never seen facial features. Much of the time it is associated with and happens when my guides are talking to me. Other times, they are just passing through, or I am passing through.)
Ok back to my house. I am in the kitchen rushing about fixing my dinner. And there is this full bodied static form just bouncing up and down side to side next to me! I looked up and said a silent OMG, which elicited laughter. My reply was another OMG! and "please, just wait, I need to eat and get laundry done first." I threw clothes in the machine and scurried up stairs to work on a couple of ITC photos I took at my desk (spirit photography- photographing water). I was working on them and noisily eating my salad. An herb mix with lots of fennel, tomatoes, red peppers and dressing. All of a sudden, Erik said something like, "That's so gross, totally nasty dude". Totally embarrassing. I was not being neat...
I finished and got up to use the toilet and like I sometimes tell my guides, "don't follow me into the bathroom please". Of which he said, "oh, like I'd want to...."
So then I went and did some more laundry, he moved off into the background, but I could sense him near by. Does Kim ever talk about spirit movement. It's very 3D and not linear like you and me. I just got the sensation he was flipping between the two of us-- location wise. In any case, I got ready for my spirit guide meeting. I said my usual prayers, and did my usual meditation. During that was pretty standard communication with them, although they did appear in a reflected surface I use sometimes, and I could be mistaken (gestalt and all) But, I could swear there was a skinny young man bouncing around behind them. It was kinda disorienting. I'd explore it more, but I am kind of on a spiritual probation. Meaning that I promised my guides that I'd not try physical mediumship until I worked on my personal issues/problems more and got a better handle on life. They refuse to help train me in that unless I work on raising my vibration. So for now I am limited to a reserved/restrained mental mediumship.
During this I asked, and implored my guides, God, and Erik to give me a stronger sign that this was real. I asked them that if it was real to please touch my left arm. Nothing happened. I was getting upset. Roger ended up saying that I must accept what is and what will be. That it is not for me to decide, but God. There is a time and place for everything. That I did not need proof and that I still had my compact to keep. Erik was silent.
After my appointment I toyed with watching tv. and whether or not to check my email. I was extremely anxious. I kept debating whether or not to check for your email on my phone. Erik popped in again and said, "Just check it, she knows""It's fine". "She read it" "Check it" .
So I did. And as the list of emails popped up and your reply was there. He pipped up saying, Seee. I told you, I told you. over and over again.
And, that's it.
Oh, wait, no.. I got my sign. My left arm has been very very warm and tingling and kinda buzzing with this strange pressure this whole time.
He just said he's going back to you now. But he'll be around. I just said, "Is this real?" and I got a "you'll see- You'll see" in reply.
I am just totally floored by what happened today. I am kinda don't know what to do. I am not a magic 8 ball kind of guy. I am adamant that the best use of spirit communication is not to know the future or that sort of thing, but to get closer to God so that we improve ourselves and others to advance to a higher spiritual place in the afterlife. I don't know for sure, the reason's Erik came to me, (other than to be friendly), but so far he's helped me with my confidence, and fear issues. -- wait, I just got an "exactly" comment from one of my guides.
Well, I am kinda worn out now. I really want to wish you a happy evening and good night. And a great rest of the weekend. I am heading up north for the birth of my nephew. In the mean time, feel free to post whatever you like. You can leave my last name off though. Don't want spammers after all.
Lots of love to your family,
Best wishes from ---------------
Jason
ps. I'll keep you posted.
*****************************************************
Thu, Sep 16, 2010 at 5:47 PM
From: Elisa
To: Jason
I love this!!!! This sounds so like Erik. He guffaws when he laughs, sometimes throws his head back, uses the kind of lingo you refer to and he's a real chatter box and can be hyper at times. Actually, another guy, Robert, has contacted me with this same story. Now, Erik hangs out alot with him and they tease each other in a playful but loving way. He loves surprising people, playing pranks, but he is absolutely harmless and sweet. He used to pop out of nowhere and scare his sisters even when he was here on the earthly plane. If he's with you, this means he thinks you need his help and he's probably taking you and Robert under his wing.
Who are George, Lydia and Roger?
Anyway, he obviously has taken a liking to you. If you want him to leave you alone, he will. He's a very compliant and sweet spirit and can give some serious advice if you need it. Usually, he gets information from higher level guides and delivers it, but he's also give his own perspective at times.
I hope you enjoy it! Can I post this or do you want to share this as a comment? I think it might bring others who have lost their children a great deal of comfort.
Your email has filled me with joy. I love seeing my baby boy happy and playful!
xoxo
Elisa
***************************************************
Thu, Sep 16, 2010 at 3:57 PM
To: Elisa, from Jason:
Just a quick follow up from our last email communication. I really hesitate to show you this because... well, I am just not sure if what happened was real or not or in my mind. Also, I do not want to give you false hope, mislead you or upset you in ANY way. I don't know if anything will even happen again. But, I just read in you last blog posting that you are having daily communication with Erik. (I am still reading Aug.). So then, after I read that, a voice said go for it.
The following actually happened right after I emailed you the first time.
Again, please, please forgive me if you think this is improper and false, I mean no disrespect.
~Jason
Ok; This is today's journal entry below: (But I've not,- and am not posting it until I get more conformation, or if you say- no. I am leaving town for the weekend so I've got a few days to see if any other communication or even lucid dreaming happens. I'll let you know. I promise not to post it without your consent. After all it may be all in my head. And nothing else may happen... Iam so scared and nervous that I may be wrong. I don't want to hurt your feelings.)
9/16/10
- not too much to report on beyond the 'usual'. Still my guides are working with me on issues. Lately they've become the 'marching band' for keeping me on track. LOTs and lots of mental and physical reminders. For example; Ever had someone drum their fingers on your head? Remember your mom trying to get you to do something... well, then I am sure you can imagine; except, this is dis-incarnate spirits doing it. And, I will say, it's working. Along with this-- this week; I've had better clarity with mental image projection/sharing from my guides. Before, other than telepathy and feelings, imagery only came in flashes in my minds eye.
**Ok, now for the next experience. I am not sure if I am imaging it--, as in projecting wishful thinking,-- or just delusional or if it's real. I suspect it's real... But, I am totally willing to be mistaken. I've never actually telepathically channeled anyone other than my guides before! I mean, I am not really sure what to think. I am waiting a few days to see if anything else happens.
So in my "musings of the unknown" section I mentioned a blog called 'channeling erik'. Well, since reading it, I think Erik came to me. This morning actually...
I was feeling very touched and moved by the blog and wanted to thank him and his family for sharing. See; I got a lot tips on communication from them about mediumship/guides etc., as well as a lot of other things.
So I fired off an email of thanks to his mom, not really expecting any reply. When all of a sudden, the mental image of an attractive young man bursts through this etheric cloud. He kept flashing between an image of his face with messy hair and a full body shot, as if he was stepping though the hole in the cloud---laughing-grinning saying, "dude it's no big deal' 'no worries'."
I was kinda taken aback in shock. He then started kinda mimicking George and danced around me taking what appeared to be delight in startling me.
He then turned to me pointed behind him irrevently and said, "They, (my guides) want you to get back to work".
I was kinda floored, and asked Roger, "Is this real? Is he really there?" Roger just said, "He does what he wants"--and then flopped his arm out in resignation. Lydia just rolled her eyes. And George appeared to be having a snickering fit.
Then; this spirit that looked like the guy in the "Erik photo" projected his face out in my minds eye and said, "boo!" and then started laughing. Then next he said, "no, really it's me, you'll see."
I thought, "What?!" I looked at Roger and Lydia in my minds eye, Lydia said, "Well, you wanted more signs didn't you? Just because he's here doesn't mean you don't have to keep your promise to us". And then she leaned back in a corner as if to give Erik the full stage.
Oh, I got to tell you this happened today from 10am -11:30ish. Some of it while on the bus! I was trying so hard not to laugh or look askew in front of strangers! I kept saying, "no, I don't believe this". And Erik would pop his head back out from the etheric cloud and say, "you'll see". (Something like) "I am now stuck on you like glue?" He even stuck his tongue out at me! laughing and snickering fading in and out. What does that mean?!
What was also shocking was how easy communication was with him, and how loud and irreverent he is. In fact I dont' even feel comfortable repeating it all on this web page, 'cause I am kinda embarrassed. OMG! he is such a chatter box!
*Ok, Elisa, if your reading this. I really hesitate to even guess if this experience is real or not. It started, because I was mentally looking at his photo and trying to 'project' feelings of thanks. And then.-- Whosh, I get this mental image; and off and on brief conversation in my head. I have a nagging suspicion that I might be in for some lucid dreaming. I'll let you know if I do.
Roger, as well as most of the reading out there says, that on the other side; thought is part of the energy that emanates from God that connects every living thing. To think of it like a 3 dimensional rapediograph drawing (that drawing toy) -circles within circles -that is in constant motion. Every living thing is connected by a line, by a joining,AND at the same time by layer after layer of superimposed dimensions that criss-cross beyond human understanding. And that all it takes to interact with these connections is the power of thought. While this is a greatly oversimplified models of the universe and of little meaning, it can be used to illustrate all of our interconnections. That because I was thinking of them while having a strong emotional response, my thought was greatly amplified, thus allowing for instant clear communication. Kind of like giving him a extra energy boost to come through.
Oh, 'he just told me to get back to work cause he can't keep doing this'. And then he took off laughing. Apparently he likes loud popping sounds to announce his arrival and departure? Did I imagine that?? Or was he just being dramatic?
ps. 2:30pm. I've postponed posting this because I am totally unsure if it was real or not. Kinda waitin on anything else to confirm.
***************************************************
Thu, Sep 16, 2010 at 11:16 AM
To: Jason, From Elisa
Hey,
Thanks for sharing! I'll keep following!
xo
Elisa
*************************************************
Thu, Sep 16, 2010 at 10:05 AM
To: Elisa, From Jason
Hi there: Just wanted to shout out a big thank you to you and your family-- and Kim.
I am sure you get a ton of these so I totally understand if you don't get this email or are not able to read it for a long time. My name is Jason, I live in xxxxx. Online I go by the pen name Paul and keep a journal about my spiritual journey and research.
I guess I am a novice-spiritualist. And I wanted to say reading your and Eriks web site has really been useful to me as well as very touching on an emotional level. I found that quite enriching.
Best wishes to you and yours!
Lots of Love,