Musings on life

As I see it...

Focusing on life is so hard.

Focusing too hard---is harder.

True focus is about looking at how you feel, think, and react within a particular situation. Then comparing that reality with how you precieve your highest possible self. If you only focus on goals; ie. what you want, desire, and think you need; if you make a list, check it twice and don't look up you will not be able to move beyond self-protection and self-promotion. You will not be able to fully engage in the process of doing. Nor will you be able to take part in helping others do the same. Which will exclude you from team efforts and shared experiences. But true personal success is always a team effort. And to lead that effort, you must look away from tight self focus. But still, as you've heard before; focus is good and desired and necessary to have a life experience; but too much focus can be bad. Better is to find a working balance. This can often take a lifetime to master. This is good.

ps.. where is the rewind and fast forward button for life.... lol

Protecting Your Image.

One of my greatest struggles has been with how I precieve myself in life. Part of this involves how I see myself in the world. Not only in physical sense, but mentally, intellectually, emotionally, spiritually. Combined, this defines my image. And most of the time this is horribly incomplete. Who am I? And how do I know? It can all be a bit overwhelming and I fight the urge to clutch what I think I know and protect myself from what I don't know or think I might know. Most of the time I find myself returning to quiet moments of introspection where I realize I know nothing. In those moments all I know is the present moment. Then I wonder, what the hell am I protecting and what am I protecting myself from.... it must be something or I wouldn't have had such an emotional reaction to a particular experience or person.

Well it turns out there is no image and there is nothing to protect. There is only the feelings within the experience and the thought it generates. What I learn, discover, and take from any of this is what really makes up who I am. If I encounter something I don't like or feels uncomfortable I think perhaps I might need to look closer at it and figure out why and how it relates to me rather than make a value judgement about it before I finish the experience. I think these incomplete judgements within aborted experiences is the root cause of a lot of my discomfort with my image at any given time.

I wonder if just simply trusting that I am who I am, within who I want to be in any given experience; And as long as I keep saying, "Who am I". I'll be more open to guidance. Through which I'll move into greater manifestations of love. As I experience more of love, the more I'll like my current perception of my image.

Perceiving others within and without our experiences:

We come into this life family of some sort. We are surrounded by people. We are born into communities, societies and many would say surrounded by love, both seen and unseen. It has been said by some, that this happens for a purpose, a reason.

If you believe this concept, there are generally two camps or schools of thought. Those that believe this purpose comes from A Deity; And within this purpose are plans. Within these plans you perceive and experience life with varying degrees of free will and Spiritual Awareness of your self within God. Then there is the camp that believes this purpose comes from, ourselves. That we in conjunction with Spiritual help, choose our lives, associations, and goals within life plans. Then within varying degrees of Spiritual Awareness, we live life.

Personally I belong to the second camp, or school of thought. I believe that the perception of dualities are used as tools in conjunction with varied levels of self awareness to engage in cause and effect. The emotional, mental, and intellectual experiences we take from our lives will allow us to come to an understanding of "who we are" and through us all of Heaven explores the concepts of "who am I'. This is an original creative process that leads back to the Source of all Creation.

But this is neither here nor there other than knowing this is a shared experience. We are never alone. We are part of a whole and the whole is part of and within each of us. And how much of what we perceive varies radically depending on our life goals and their interactions with other people's life goals. Whether we are aware of this or not dictates how much of our experience is shared with others, how much is influenced by others, and how much our experience influences the world around us.

Many times in my own life I've become stuck on how I perceive others within my life and outside of my experiences. I find myself obsessing and focusing too hard on how I interpret others opinions of me and my experiences. I have a fear of others reactions to my self precieved image. Again as I mentioned before, I fear a loss of self. And, that image and perspective is woefully incomplete.

I fear a judgement of this incomplete image. But on further exploration of this feeling I see that, I really have nothing to fear, because I can not loose what I do not yet understand. The self. My perception of self is not yet fully developed.

That is what I am exploring, seeking with all my might to discover. TO know myself. I fear an interruption of this process, but it is pointless because this process to know and discover myself is Divine. It can not be interrupted or taken away. It is eternal. And can it ever be fully discovered? Is there a limit to self discovery? Is there a limit to who we might become, or be? Do you want there to be a limit to who you are and how you experience and to what you might experience? What limits will I set on myself. I guess I fear at times, to find out. I fear the perception of others setting limits for me. I fear others telling me what their limits are for fear that those might be applied to my life.

NO, never fear the journey of the self. There are NO limits other than that which you set for yourself. The only limit is the cause and effect within the karma that you create for yourself. What are my choices WITHIN my state of being, how can I change my state of being. To me, It is all a choice one way or another. How you react, how much work you undertake to understand yourself through experience. Now; you don't have to experience, you can just BE and then you ARE.. But you won't really understand who you are within ALL that might possibly BE.

Now, this is all moot if you don't believe or accept that before birth you do decide, plan, or choose your life. For those that do not... I have no words.. I only have words on my own perception of my experiences. For me; Life is not about the experience. Life is about the "Emotional and Intellectual understanding I take with me through my experience. That aspect of the experience that helps define Who I am, right now in the moment, knowing that I am an Eternal being seeking to understand All that is.

ps. all this is still a struggle.. I am not sure our struggles ever totally leave or get better... only our understanding and ability to manage it grows. Our mastery of it increases...

Going it alone:

I have found in my life that overcoming anything requires strong action based thought. The degree of which should be equal or greater to that which is overwhelming. And it is best achieved if such action is reapplied in a methodical planned out way in-spite of any future feeling. A strong foundation is not built by desire alone. It is not put to good use through simple observation. It must be built upon over time. It must be then used and kept in repair. This is true with our experiences.

As in construction, your life will be defined by preservation, expansion, or decline. But to renew takes constant work, dedication, and planing.

These are all processes of the human condition. A commonality to humanity. At it's best we empower each other in the self creation of bodies of grandeur. At it's worst we tear down and and loot. We can over overcome this cycle by becoming neighborhoods of self sustainability. Each building built with the greater good in mind. How will we serve our neighbor in this effort? Only by joining to raise our roofs will we create structures to stand through the tests of this life.

To deny that we need others can be so painful. No one like thinking they are not capable of building and creating their life on their own. Even though they might be good at plumbing, or electrical, or pounding a nail, even so they frequently do not have the blueprint in hand. They lack the full muscle, and strength to finish all of the work by themselves. They've not stepped back and seen the progress of their house. They are trapped between the studs trying to hold the creation of what they see.

Only by raising our awareness of our self and our place within All that is; do we realize that we can not do it alone. We should not have to "go it alone"...

Do not go alone.

Going it alone in life will hurt

Hurt is not necessary

Let go

Ask for help

Hold out your hand

Help will come