March 2011

March, 31, 2011

Today's channeled messages:

"Everyone's experiences from past lives and present circumstances give them unique personality, predilections, and impulses; One must be careful that they do not create further obsessions that would distract from current life goals and the welfare of the world. Through this it is good to have clearly defined intentions of attitude. Hold these 2 thoughts, "Is what I am doing; what I am thinking; and how I am feeling-- helping make a better me?" "How can I express love to help others""

"Opportunity is about the possibility of useful."

"It is better to encourage with suggestion within care and respect than to criticise. Judge not others actions but judge what more you can give."

"Bring your personality into harmony with that which you wish to be. Why not reach as high as you can? Know that you have commonalities with all of creation. Think about what this means to your life."

"Your material world is an composite of moving Spiritual energy into elemental manifestations. These manifestations are only limited by unaware thought. The more you experience the more you can learn. The more you learn the more you become aware of the posibilities of manifestations. The more you can understand of this process, the more you can create. The more you can create the more forms you can create for yourself to experience that which you can imagine. Do not fear this out pouring of Spiritual energy. Worry not about it's process for all of the Heavens are behind your journey."

--- Lessons with my Spirit Teacher

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Do what you feel you can do today--and tomorrow try to do one more. There is always work to be done. Balance need with intent, weed out desire, and strive for love. -- Spirit

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Message on the term "Greatness"

Q: I want to do great things. I want a great life. I wanna be great. Tell me how.

A: How great is your love? Are you willing to express it in unconditional ways? How do you see love in yourself and your life. If you know the answer to this you will find there is no such thing as greatness. Everyone is the same. You, God, your neighbor, the weeds next to your feet. Forget great and explore how you wish to live and impact life around you.

Humans use the term "greatness" as a descriptive tool without measurement. Frequently it is applied to people, places, and ideas. But where it might be better used is in conjuction with tasks pertaining to life journey. How great do you see the tasks you have put before yourself. How does this make you feel? Do you consider them great? Why? How are you measuring this greatness. The degree to which you work at understanding this will define greatness in your life.

When looking without oneself; Greatness is a viewpoint of others often backed with poorly explored intention or thought. When looking within; Greatness is often the ego wanting to quit. There is always better experiences to be had, and more service to offer. ---From my guides.

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March, 31, 2011

Random Thoughts of mine:

I think the tightrope the emotional sensitive walks is all about balance. If we wobble to the left we step on responsibility and duty and squish it. If we wobble to the right we slogg through the muck of ego and attachment. But if we don't look down and stay focused on feeling the feeling for balance we might move a few feet more down the rope.

One of the most interesting things I've discovered about the realms of Spirit and interactions therein of is that locality, presence, action, interaction, and reality is not dependent on physical form. Thought, energy projection, and perceptions are just as real as anything we experience in the 3D. "You think therefore you are" is more than just philosphical words.

March, 31, 2011

Every now and then I run across postings online that are heavy into fear based thinking. Worrying about the future of mankind. Talk of end times, stress, anxiety, and fear of the future. Here's the thing about such stuff. It doesn't help you life NOW. How does this stuff help you manage your 4 year old? How does this help your community? How does such stuff help you experience love? Can you grow yourself, your family into something better by participating in speculative fear? Maybe you can. Maybe worrying about such things will help you. But it's not for me. I won't even ask Spirit about it. I believe even if the world is a scary horrible place, I believe we should seek ways to uplift and heal rather than be afraid. For only by asking how we can help can we move from this type of fear.

Prophetic visions, scenarios of end times, doom and gloom, can very often be sensationalism passed between the dis-incarnate and the incarnate. Many times the spirit world will toss out scenarios that are probabilities and likely hoods based on potential actions and reactions of societies at large or individuals. The future is rarely set in stone so to speak. The Spiritual Masters who have lived thousands of lives across multiple universes teach that there is no end to all the ways the divine source can, might, and will experience through all life. Life in all it's possible manifestations is utterly impossible for mankind to perceive. It is better to have faith that ever greater experiences await those who seek and to make every effort to live in the now the best we can. For why worry about unknown probabilities of future tomorrows when you can help your neighbor today?

--Just my 2 cents.

March, 30, 2011

I've still been struggling with a bad attitude based on last weeks experiences. I thought I was fine. But it keeps coming up through various means. Made me realize I was still nursing a bit of hurt.

Q: -- How do I forgive someone who hurt you who does not seem sorry?

A: -- (Inspired by Spirit)

Many Beings, do not possess the emotional experience, tools, and understanding of a larger picture to give them enough perspective to see what effects their actions or lack there of have caused. They just do not yet see how an apology can bring you to experience forgiveness and peace. Many people are so blinded by their own experiences that they will never be in a position to see. It is often a personal lesson in emotional and spiritual liberation to not only forgive them for this shortcoming, but to forgive yourself for holding on to your emotional reaction. For it is important to not let your emotional response hold you hostage. Other reasons can be more fear based for you! By not forgiving them is to let them have power over you. So what can only seem like the goal of having compassion for others, it is also about having compassion for oneself. To realize that you are worth growing from all experiences. That to pass through such difficulties one can emerge as something greater than one was upon entering it. If your angry. You are angry at the hurt they caused or inadvertently caused. And your angry at your feelings. At your reaction, at your reality as a result of this and as a result of your feelings. You've probably spent a great deal of time and effort thinking about these feelings. You may even seem unable to let go. You are loosing your personal power to control your live by choosing to spend time on this. But if you forgive them it can be over. But forgiveness is not forgetting. Do not forget because it needs to be a lesson in the broad human emotional spectrum. It will let you understand a little bit more about human evolution and development. By working to understand this, you will discover you have more tools to deal with future experiences. And the more experiences you master, the more you will be able to control the outcomes in ever more positive ways. Thus moving yourself and others into ever greater states of being. Forgiveness is all about YOU. Not the other person. Do not forget. If you forgive and forget you risk being taken advantage of again. Forgive and remove yourself from the situation, and actively seek better experiences. IF the other person comes to you seeking forgiveness and help, THEN you might consider helping them with love. For THEN you will have an opportunity to FURTHER ACT upon YOUR forgiveness. Forgiveness is an emotional tool for US to heal, empower and grow. It can lead to opportunities of unconditional love and helping others. It is just as much a teaching tool as anything else. What you do with it, what you intend with it, and what you learn from it, will help define you. For in the end, the only thing you CAN control is your reaction. How you apply it to the world around you is a choice. The whole concept of forgiveness means "to give" regarding a reason. That reason should always be about developing yourself. Decide how you would have liked the experience to have gone better. When you think about what or how that might be, you will be focusing your original creative thought upon it with all your focus. This will automatically start to generate newer experiences that will let you grow in positive ways. This effort will come back to you in more and more positive ways. So next time when you are debating whether or not to forgive someone. Imagine without expectation what you wish to happen the next time you encounter this type of experience, rather than what you don't want. Then you will find what you experience is more inline with what you DO want rather than what you don't want. If you focus on you instead of how the other or someone hurt you; YOU will grow ever more into what and who you truly are.

March 29, 2011

Yesterday I spent some time talking to Robert,

I talked to him for a good bit yesterday.

My guides relieved my guilt

from the day of doing nothing by basicallly blasting my scalp with

buzzing heat and told me in a funny round about way to get off my ass

and get back to work. (grin). Erik said I was like a cheetah. Go go

go - collapse out of breath.

It was funny. I was sitting there talking nonsense to Robbert and all

of a sudden I am aware that I've been feeling this burning sensation

in a ring around the crown of my scalp. Usually that is an indicator

of a certain high level spirit wanting to talk to me, or near me. So I

ask Robert, "Is there anyone who wants to talk to us or me" And that's

when he said, they wanted me to keep in mind, not to slack off too

long, because there was always work to be done!

Ha ha..... Then we laughed cause I was guilty and caught. My poor bad

attitude. I'd been whining for an attitude adjustment and got one. And

it's true there is always work to be done. There is stuff to learn,

stuff to write, healing to be sent. People to try and help. Productive

things in everyday life that need attending to. My work, family,

friends. And I was totally being selfish. Oh well.

And the timing was funny. About 15--30 min. right before my previously

scheduled channeling practice appointment with my guides that I was

gonna bail on!

March 28, 2011

Human lives are similar to Earths great civilizations. Knowingly or unknowingly existing and moving through the ages. All come and fall under the dramas you create for each other. You dance in and through each others songs. Your greatest strength is to adapt, change, grow, learn, and absorb the wounds of your life's history. Use all of it to create greater experiences for yourself. It is a great gift if you let it be so. For you will always remain you, but every seeking a better you. Do not fear getting lost or losing your way. Remember a popular phase in your time, for it is very true. You are not seeking a God or Rules, or direction but you are seeking an understanding that God is in you and is living through you.--Inspired by Spirit

March 25, 2011

oh, before I forget. I had a really rare experience last night as well. I woke up suddenly at around 2:30 and heard a female voice near my bed say, "hello". or "hello there". It was 3D in the room. Or it seemed that way. Had that intercom tiney feel to it. I don't know who it was. I couldnt' come up with anything clairvoyently. I wondered if it was Jill or Lydia. I just said, 'hi, lov-ya' and went back to sleep.

March 25, 2011

Last night one of my Teachers in Spirit, Meher Baba came to me and with my minds eye I had a vision. I found my higher self dressed in a white robe, and after being startled about this, I looked up and saw him in front of me with hands folded and smiling at me. He thanked me for passing along a message and told me the message remained as valid for me as well. He said it was meant to be a mantra to be used to raise my spiritual vibration. It was a message for all humanity not just me or another individual. That being, "Do not fear. Do not be afraid. Try not to worry so much. You are surrounded by love".

He took me by the arm and walked me to a park bench in the void of my minds eye. As we sat down it resolved into a garden park. And the sky was lit with stars. He said that we are all beings of light and love. Even from the darkest, most painful moments of every existence, there are sparks of light. It is up to us to be beings of light. To fan those sparks into roaring flames of light. There are many fits and starts, and sometimes the fuel is just to wet. But we need to keep trying to find fuel for our fire and burn as brightly as we can. For if we light that fire we can be light in the dark. There is no death. There is only love. He said, Keep going no matter what happens in life. He said, The ascended masters, who have lived innumerable incarnations in multiple universes got there by a determination to experience, understand, live, love, and serve all of creation.

He said our lives were like a geode. He held a gray round course rock in his hand. It seemed ugly, plain, unassuming. He said, this rock is hard, it can be dull, but cause great damage. But if we take the time to study it closely we will notice something delicate and subtle about it. We will see that it's inside is filled with precious gems and crystal. That opened and revealed in the light of day it is luminescent and radiates and reflects light. So you all are like rocks. Compress it enough through life's experiences and you might just end up with a diamond. Once you find the gems of your soul. Make sure you polish them. How they look and reflect light is really about how much effort you want to put into it. Remember to live and love the best you can.

March 24, 2011

I had a very odd day yesterday. I left work feeling very exhausted. I did a fair amount of channeling, reading/studying a book with Z, as well as my usual work stuff. Then at some point during the day; My soul sister contacted me via cell phone. The mystic that she is seeing to develop her clair abilities and receive Reiki from canceled on her. The lady reported being harassed by a Spirit and she reported being very upset by her experience. At first she questioned if my soul sister and her son had some metaphysical involvement somehow. And the question between the two women caused some drama within our family circle. That being me, her, Robert, ect. On my end of it I tried to council my sister to connect with Jillian and Erik about it. Z assured me everything was fine and that the experience was beyond me, but related to the women in question. He did offer some advice to both my sister and myself. But I wanted to see if I could clairvoyently see anything of what might be going on. So Z, I and my angels went to my minds eye view and here is what I saw.

(First I want to say that in the morning I sent Reiki to the two ladies from nothing but love on my part and I did not sense anything amiss)

Vision:

I sat at my desk and had an active vision. I went to go look at the woman's

higher self --clairvoyently, to see if I could see anything. I saw a

vision of a woman laying on a bed and a black as ink alien-

weird looking creature circling her. At this point my teacher Z and my

angels were with me. We were nothing but radiant light. We approached

her and cast orb light shields around her. We covered her with our

light. I could see nothing human in the black creature form. I

approached it and spun my shields out in concentric orbs and pushed it

back. I wrapped light around it and pushed it away. It was actually a

lot of work. It didn't want to go. In fact I pushed so hard it's body

ripped away from it's frozen in place feet/claws that were embedded into the floor at her bedside. I drove it away beyond the light we created. I took this

all as symbolism.

That what ever that was, had dug tendrils into her life path. I saw nothing at all that would indicate our family. Our light and shields were keeping it at

bay but it circled. I also went and put light and shields around my sister's

house and family. I also gave Reiki to our guardian angel and saw her

energy and shield increase. It may all be symbolic for what's already

happened without me, but it is what I saw.

My guides, Z, and Angels, and Erik tell me constantly, over and over

again....."Remember our promises! Do not fear, do not be afraid. You

are surrounded by love. We would not let any thing or any spirit harm

you."

Given the weight of my subjective experiences I feel I have no

alternative but to surrender to my perception of love.

Robert thinks another angle is due to a past life experience between my sister and an old lover who was abusive to her and her son. And didn't want her son to receive healing. I really don't know. I didn't see anything pertaining to it. But Robert sees way more than I do. In these types of situations Erik is usually silent as they are for us to work out.

Here is what I learned from the experience as it pertains to my vision and my attempt at interpreting it and clairvoyant vision in general.

-Don't make value judgments on incomplete information

-Strive for emotional balance, balance in action and reaction.

-Tell it like you see it

-do not interpret that which you do not understand.

-act with & within love even in the face of & TO that which you fear.

-respect and love all

-respect and obey free will of all

-Do no harm

-show love light by example, compassion and forgiveness NOT by force.

-protect, defend, love, guide when called upon or asked; when not--ask first.

-be polite and respectful

-be thankful and grateful

-try harder, strive for dedication and be persistent

-focus, concentrate and try to remember to live and love in the now

March 23, 2011

A post based on 'the message of healing' from a spirit mentor of mine, Charlie.

Modalities, techniques, and methods of participating in healing energy are all tools with which to channel either your personal energy or universal source energy for spiritual, physical, and emotional healing. Tools for the mind. To access these imagine as clear as you might whom you wish to send energy to. Then while holding that image, imagine love as best as you can. Imagine love as a force of nature. Form does not matter. Imagine gathering it into your heart. Try to hold it there while picturing who you wish it to go to. Imagine if you will, that love growing and growing and growing. Then imagine yourself opening up to all the love in the universe. It's a bit abstract, but try to think about what it feels like when others love You! Imagine their love as a force coming to you and entering your body. Entering your heart. This is universal love and energy coming to you. It is limitless. Gather it there with your love. Imagine it gathering into a warm fuzzy ball. Now don't forget to picture the person needing healing. Now try to overlap the two images. The ball of love and the person. Let them merge. Tell the person. 'I send you this energy so you may heal for the greater good. I love you.' There. Your done. You've just sent healing energy using another tool. Your mind.

"There are so many in the world who would benefit from receiving love and light. You can make a difference even if it is to simply take time in your day to turn your thoughts to others."--Charlie

"Again. Sit quietly. Open your mind to love. Make it boundless without limits. As you breath in feel your chest expand and feel the love growing continue breathing deeply and with every breath feel the love grow and grow and be aware that is the universal source of love, and hold in your mind the concept that you would like this feeling to be shared with another individual, place, or group, and then you will be channeling like a river between this source and them. A light channel in the darkness. There are no limits. Every particle of light helps be it a candle, a torch or a light house. All is helpful."--Charlie

--- based on teaching of Spirit Teacher Charlie, my guides, other Teachers and my personal experience.

Hear the whole message

http://www.box.net/shared/xkqujoh5kv

http://sites.google.com/site/kookyspookyookyjournal/home

http://www.spirit-lodge-diary.blogspot.com/

http://www.channelingerik.com/

Any strong thought of love brings instant reaction in our realities. Have faith that this is so. Fear not it's origin. The universe would be dead if this was not a natural law. -- Spirit

March 21, 2011

A channeled light work excersise inspired by the readings of theosphy and the instruction my Spirit Teacher.

Channeling light in the darkness

When in doubt of that which is light, when sad, when full of lament,

Cast your inner vision outward to the light of heaven and call upon

your birthright. Call upon all that you know is your highest state of

being. Know this as pure light and let it fill you. Let it pulse

outward in wave after pulse after wave of pure light. Pull the light

around yourself and let it glow. Know no sorrow, know no pain, know no

doubt.

When you find yourself with a feeling that which is dark and foreign,

STOP and examine your heart and find the feeling. If it has come from

within, if you find darkness within your own thoughts, banish them

from your mind. Send through your body a wave of vibration, a wave of

light. Irregular first and regular second. Pulse -wave, Pulse-wave.

Repeating time and time again until you are free. Start the wave

energy in the brain and direct it to your foot.

But if you find the darkness is not from you, not from your heart. Be

sure that is is from someone or thing outside of you directed at you.

Only by knowing this can you overcome it. Only by Spiritual wisdom can

you hope to be free. Knowledge brings wisdom and wisdom brings power

of one's self.

Seek first a place outside of you that is dark, within the mind's eye.

Place a circle around yourself. Stand or float in the middle of the

circle. Raise your hands and call to light. Draw in light. Call to the

highest of spirits through space time. Fill your body and circle with

light. Let it bloom, blossom, explode and shine all about you. Push it

out and away from you filling all your space. This is the Spirit of

All life. Be a source of this Spirit and shine it always.

Then Darkness will never approach.

March 19, 2011

"You are like the farm girl who draws water from a mountain well, one small bucket at a time; Who then pours the water into a trough that runs down the mountain to water a thousand paddies of rice. As one you can only hope to water one plot- today! But if others in your village see you at the well they will know it's time to water the fields. Now the whole crop will be watered. The whole crop will now be likely harvested. So it is with drawing spiritual awareness for personal growth." -- Elizabeth, my Reiki Guide

March 16, 2011

Many times, I encounter the suffering of others. It breaks my heart. Most of the time I don't know what to say. In this life time I find myself unable to meet the sufferers level to co-experience their pain. And I find that I have a desire to help, but I have no clue how to do that. In association with the Channeling Erik website; this suffering is often as a result of the death of loved ones. Some times from Suicide. And while people in my family have experienced suicide in this incarnation; I have not. Never the less I often find myself trying to understand suffering in this world. I created a little page about it. Which in itself is hard for me to talk about due to my fear of criticism. I often find myself reluctant to offend anyone's religious or personal belief systems; especially when they are in pain. But here is the link. Suffering in the world

March 14, 2011

People often complain that they can not achieve Spiritual progression, communion, and advancement. So they focus on the problems of their reality.

This is a 180 in truth. They need to turn around and try to see that what they are seeking is the opposite of how they precieve life.

It is so important that you never give up. No matter how many times you think you fail at an experience; No matter how many road blocks you run into; Your reason for being, for living still exists. There are many things in your reality that is impossible depending on your progression. You can not climb a mountain until you know about the right equipment. And you can not understand how to use the equipment until you acquire that equipment; And you can not ascend the mountain until you arrive with all your gear at it's foot. This is life. Step by step by step.

In communion with Spirit these tasks are simpler. For you have the whole of the heavens waiting to help you. You have the whole of your divine power that you can use. So that by step by step and never giving up you can overcome, succeed, grow, and be happy with love found where ever you may seek it. You just have to take that first step.

March 14, 2011

Live mindfully by example

Many people follow Spiritual Masters of all persuasions. There is much good in the world. One of the most useful things we can do is to lay our thoughts on any topic next to those we look up to. Compare your thoughts to what you imagine theirs to be. Seek to remove any tendencies to extreme and lack of understanding. Either examine what does not feel right or let it go. Look within you for what you admire in your Spiritual Master and try to live up to it. Imagine what it must be like to be next to them. Hold your impression of them in your mind as best you can. And then ponder how you must look in their eyes. Ignore any imagined or real shame, fear, disappointment, anger and despair, and look closely at what you might want to change about yourself. For this will always represent a choice. The creative free will that will set you free. Imagine why such a being might love you. Try to accept it and strive to create more of it in your life. You can do this. You are surrounded by love and can reflect it back if you so choose to live mindfully. -- My Spirit Teacher

March 12, 2011

Today was probably one of the most frustrating days I've experienced in a long time. I'd say it ranks up in the top 5. Mostly that due to my inability to manage my emotions the way I want in this matter. Self pity is a harsh mistress.

Early this morning I had a Spiritual experience that really threw me off the proverbial deep end again. I thought I had a good handle on it right after it happened. But like so much of life; A bad attitude got in the way.

It so hard for me to talk about this. I fear other peoples reactions, belief systems, and perceptions and yes, judgment.

As some of you have read about before or have been told; one of the biggest thing I've come into this life experience for is to experience and work through all aspects of fear. For me this includes Spiritual fear. So as I've said before; All my life I've experienced the so called paranormal. It has been a big part of my journey to seek new self perspectives in it. To discover perceptions of love vs. my fear.

And what's hard is there are just as many opinions and beliefs of Spirituality and the paranormal as there is in anything else. My primary goal has always been to just state things like I see or experience it. Yet I fear others judgment and opinions on it based on their own belief systems. So thus this is hard to talk about.

Well, as many of you know; I believe in a metaphysical Spiritualist world view. I do not believe in hell or the so called Devil. But I do believe in a very wide range of Spiritual entities and species. That are both incarnate and dis-incarnate. Everything from Et's to intelligent animalistic spirit forms.

In fact as I stated before I (my higher self) and my guides have used these on occasion in my paranormal experiences to either "wake me up" to the world of Spirit OR to help me work on aspects of spiritual fear. You can read about some of these in my early journal entries.

Ever since April 2010; My paranormal and Spiritual experiences have all been loving and positive. And uncovering the nature of a life time of experiences has been a tumultuous emotional roller coaster.

But, my guides wanted to make sure that I progressed beyond this and developed the Spiritual strength, wisdom, and perspective to deal with all sorts of manifestations of Spirit and other entities. And they wanted to make sure I did not carry spiritual fear with me.

So about a month ago they decided to "test" me. This occurred clairvoyently in mind's eye vision. I saw my guides in a room and they stood infront of a wall that was all glass. Like at the zoo, when you see the dangerous wild animal exhibit behind glass. And behind glass was this weird creature. It was tall and thin. It was greens and browns and grays and kinda hairy. All very unusually perportioned. And it had a bulbous odd face and it had scary teeth and human eyes. It thrashed about and when it saw me it tried to climb the glass to get at me. But it couldn't. I feel my guides wanted to see the entity I encountered a few years ago that caused me to wake up. Not a deamon, but a lower animalistic life form. Primal so to speak. Like a wolverine or some such animal. I don't know if it was the year of positive experiences or Erik, or my guides influence; but I was not afraid. I was curious. I walked up to it and leaned over the glass. It leapt at me. My spirit flared white and yellow and cowered it. I grabbed it by the neck and said. I am not afraid and I love you. Seek the light and learn to love. And then that vision ended. It was very emotional.

Then I thought I was done with that. But early this morning. I couldn't sleep. So I came down stairs and sought out the couch. I tried to snooze and pander for attention from Erik and the gang. But they were not really around like I wanted them to be. I rolled over and tried to sleep. All of a sudden my clairvoyent vision and hearing switched on full and I felt like I was only half there. And half in an alternate duplicate overlapping reality. I could hear a dryer running. And I could hear this banging around and other strange noises. Perhaps shuffling or walking. The all of a sudden I hear this growling behind my head. And I saw clairvoyently it was another bizarre snarly hairy weird spirit form. I immediately called out for Erik in a panicked state of mind. It was cold and I had pins and needles all over my entire body. I didn't sense a hostility from the being, but rather a weird crankiness. I turned to it and looked right at it and told it to leave me. I told it that I loved it, and it was vital that it seek only love and light. Then it was gone. Then Erik, my guides, and angels came and told me it was a test. That the universe was filled with all levels and types of creatures. And as a sensitive I could give them love or fear. They have just as much right to exist as I do. And that the way to properly deal with them, is to fill one self with love and light and let it fill you completely. To live by example, and to shine light where you can. My Angels said I was never in danger and in fact reminded me of their promise to me. They then talked to me more about righting living, right thoughts and right perspectives, all with out fear. I felt my vibration raise insurmountably in their presence filled with their words. I felt like my soul couldn't possibly fit into my body. And I felt bad about my reaction of fear and anger toward this /these creatures. So I turned my vision clairvoyenetly to them. I sought them out and discovered them in a dark cavern looking place. A void of earthen mounds of dirt, lit by camp fires and rocks. I found them and Tried to speak and appoligise and tell them That I loved them and wished for them to evolve seeking love and light. But as my astral body was in their space. It shone with such light that they would not approach or move. It looked as if they feared me. It was quite the eye opener on perspective.

I am not sure what to make of it all. In fact it's put me in a weird funky mood all day. I swing from happy that it happened and I had a resolution, to angry at my guides for springing this on me, to angry with myself for a bad attitude and feeling sorry for myself. I was also really sad that Erik could not help me out emotionally. This was between my guides, my angels and me. At one point I really just wanted to hug him and cry my eyes out. I was despondent and inconsolable that they would do this to me again. I was rampit with blame. Refusing to see that circumstances in my life experience had been chosen for specific reasons. And it was simply a matter of perspective and choice on how I dealt with that. I confess for much of the morning I did not deal very well. I was very rude to Erik and my guides, and tried to block them out. And of course that only fueled my pity party and self abuse. I know this all sounds very woo hoo weird to people who are not sensitive, but these were some of the most emotional and spiritual experiences I have ever gone through. Close examination of perspective, belief, fears, understanding, perspectives of realities. All a bizare mix of clairvoyence, caliraudience, empathic, and 3D physical reality. I am not even sure i've done justice to these experiences from my descriptions.

In the end I feel I have nothing left to do but to follow my teachers and guides advice. To live all aspects of life to the fullest possible manifestations of love I can manage. To fill my self with perspectives of light and love and share with others. "Thought backed by intent from a personal perspective creates reality". What you choose to do about this idea will define how you live.

So day dream, hallucination or real. In the end it does not matter. Today I learned about showing love in the face of fear.

Why Did I have such a bad emotional reaction this morning, to my so called experience?

What was I feeling:

-surprise

-startlement

-shock

-fear

-distress

-betrayal

-sadness

-loss

-pain

-self pity

-emotional drain

-anger

-put out

-selfishness

-powerless

I felt like I my "family, friends in Spirit" had let me down. I had this mispreception that nothing scary would ever come my way again. But there promise was not that, but rather they would never let any Spirit harm me. And they wanted me to know that the power to confront and overcome hardship, fear, and scary stuff was within me. Not them.

But at the time it hurt really bad. I can't help it. I don't want to feel that but I did. My grandma even said she couldn't help me. That it was something I had to confront. The little boy in me just wants to curl up and bawl. But the man in me wants to go through this so that others aren't scared. So I can show them they can overcome stuff too.

I also wonder if some of the emotion is from my reiki attuenment.

March 12, 2011

Am feeling very tired this weekend. I had a very very long week of spiritual experiences. Some of which I have not related in the journal yet. On top of this, family, work, friends, and CE blog stuff. I am very worn out. My Spirit Teacher very often tries to get me to have better balance in my life. It's probably one of the most difficult things for me to achieve.

The burden of sensing that which is other is always present with me. Others seek to clear the mind and call Spirit to them. For me, never is there a moment where I am not aware of something unseen around me. It's like I sit behind a curtain and I know there is others behind it. I often try to blank the mind and meditate not to clear my thoughts and connect with other. But to seek ways to turn it off. I often feel like I have no control and can bear it no more. Most people do not understand what this means. They think it would be wonderful. But communication does not work like they think it should. Spirit insists on free will and so will not offer any communication that jeopardizes it. Much of the time it is very one sided. And I tire of it. I can see them, hear them, I know they are there. But the attention and love I seek from them can not be in 3D. It is so often only through the clairs. Much of the time, communication is only surrounding spiritual guidance, emotional and spiritual lessons. It's like being away at war and not being able to touch your loved ones. Not being able to touch them. And all you have a lots of short letters, and photographs. Much of the time; living with this is scary and confusing. But this is my fault. Because I don't have the answers. I only can tell people what I see and hear. And sometimes it isn't much and I don't understand it. But it's there always, whether they believe me or not. And when they don't believe me it only adds to my burden. It reminds me of being a little kid, when I was bullied. Only in this instance the only ones I can turn to, can't help me the way I want. Much of the time; well- no; all of the time I have no choice but to keep trying to live. For me I have no choice. The weight of subjective proofs given throughout my entire life is so great that it totally defines my objective reality. This sounds very crazy to the materialist. Sometimes I've wondered if I should haul my ass to the funny farm. But you see, I lead quite a successful happy life other than this one aspect. But even so. The combination of dealing with this stuff and people can be enough I feel the urgent urge to step away from both.

Many of you must think that surely others like me or in the CE group could help me. They do. They really do. But you see; Life experiences like this, and those in the CE group. Elisa, Robert, etc. These type of things are basically a Spiritual calling. And they have their goals and burdens just like I do. On top of that they have their own baggage and burdens of everyday life. So often times, I am left with nothing else but to journal about this journey. Many of you long for clair experiences. But I can tell you; at times, It's very lonely. Depending on sensitivity, and which for me, is not constant, and depends on the Spirit, clarity and 'realness' is just as real as anything in life. But it's like talking on a bizarre video phone that includes emotion. But you can't touch them or control it.

So while yes, Those in Spirit are there for me 24/7, and yes, while they do wait for me, while they do guide me, it is not they same as a 3D earth experience. So fight for your relationships here and now. Fight for your goals, Fight for your life here. Live and love every moment, ever good and bad thing. Feel all of it. Roll in the mud and enjoy living in tactile ways. Because living consciously with Spirit, it's easy to loose sight of what is important now. sometimes all you can think about is "other" and you long for it so bad it's painful. And when Spirit realizes what your feeling, they will sometimes back off and try to get you to return to the moment. And that in and of itself is painful. So you see Sensing spirit is a mixed bag. And while it's truly been the most joyful experience, the highlight of my life, it's important to show all sides of it for others.

March 11, 2011

This is a big posting. Part Journal part email exchange between my soul sister and I. Erik is not involved per say so I am sticking here. It's basically past life, vision weirdness. But all related. Quite the email exchange. Please excuse the spelling and grammer for now. I dont' have time to edit it all right now.

03/08/2011

So my friend Sharon. Who has been my sister in several past lives. In some of those Erik was involved. We are very close now. She is also clairvoyant, clair audient and Erik hangs out with her too. Erik's Spirit spouse/ love- Jillian is Sharron's son's guardian Angel. or something.

Any way. Sharon is also learning to channel and do reiki ect.

And she is learning from a mystic.. who Erik asked to teach her. Sharron didn't know anything about it at the time.

The other week Sharron had a past life vision about me.

Of me burying my child. Lowering the coffin into the ground. I didn't give it much thought or care. As I didn't see it in my visions and thus it had no emotion for me. But it greatly upset Sharon.

Then today she sent me this email. I am not sure what to make of it.

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Sharon to Jason:

I have a message for you... Remember when I told you that I had a vision of you burying a baby. That was you and it was your baby. Your wife was sickly she gave birth prematurely. She died in childbirth. You also had two older children that died.

You have made a pact to never have children. You lived a life as a slave in Mesopotamia. Your children were raped and brutalized in front of you. They were also murdered in front of you. You vowed to never have children again. You have lived lives where you died at the point of maturity and procreation to avoid it. Your children in other lives died because of your choice. Eleanor believes that this is so painful for you that you blocked it out.

Don't underestimate how much you were affected. The pact you made was on no uncertain terms. The only person that can change that is you. Eleanor believes that even in this life if you decided to have a child it could die of cancer etc.. That's how serious your pact is.

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This was my reply:

-It is true.

This is why I am learning Reiki. To heal my soul, to heal other's souls. This is why I am drawn to self punishment, and my I have burning desires to rescue people. Why even though I can't stand the pain of peoples loss, I am drawn to try to fix them and help them. Why I am drawn to Elisa's site.

Is this true? I dunno.

I feel really conflicted. At the moment I only see life as a gay man without the desire for children. I like kids, but the thought of me having them makes me really anxious. It's so weird. All my past life visions have been of me as either a victim, by choice or circumstance; or a woman; or a young man; or child. Never as someone old.

I wonder what all this means for future incarnations. I look at people with families. And at first such views, I looked upon with horror because it seemed like their entire lives were consumed and taken up with their children. And that always bugged me in this life. Yet at the same time, I've always been consumed with trying to find ways to serve others or society. And not always succeeding. Fits and starts.

I've also been really consumed with Spirituality in this life. Either seeking it or running from it. I feel I've come a long way. But at the same time I feel like one of the big struggles for me is finding a balance between that and just living day to day in a meaningful way.

I will say though. Coming upon awareness and developing my relationship with the "spirit gang" has been the highlight of my life so far. A huge joy. One I hope I'll be able to purse in the next life time.

I am not sure what to make of the message for me; at the moment. But I wanted to say thank you to you, Elanor, and those in Spirit for passing it along. I am sure future contemplation will be useful.

For today. on with life and Reiki attuenment.

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I feel like my life is a Spiritual and Metaphysical Soap Opera!

SIghhhhh.........................

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03/08/2011 -- later that morning;

I have a really weird feeling and thought right now.

If this was real. And if I somehow managed to free myself of this vow or compultion or curse or whatever it is. I then would have a crap load of kids. Which that thought scares me. Which of course, that feeling itself might be from this past experience/vow. whatever..

What a lot to think about. Not sure what to think.

I have to figure out how and if this information serves me in this life first. And wether or not I want to attach any emotional investment on it. I feel something lurking under the surface. Like a sea of tears or something. The whole time back I kept thinking. Ok, can't let anyone know I've been crying. And I wasn't even crying!

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03/08/2011 -- later that day from Sharon

Pact isn't the correct word. Vow is more like it. I also believe you can overcome it. Let me ask e what she thinks... I apologize for telling you that at work.

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03/08/2011

Jason to Sharon,

My name is Murk. And I am a camel herder from Ur. Ha ha ha...

I'll sell you 2 camels for a 3 sheep and a bag of rice!

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03/08/2011

sharon to Jason

Did ERIK put you up to that? I was like, wait what? Let the mesopotamia jokes begin.

I am so glad that connecting to spirit has been a huge joy for you. Don't underestimate how much you were affected. The pact you made was on no uncertain terms. The only person that can change that is you. Eleanor believes that even in this life if you decided to have a child it could die of cancer etc.. That's how serious your pact is. What she said this morning was that she was afraid that even if you decided to have a child in this life something could happen to the baby because you decided before you came into this life you didn't want children. You were born gay to avoid it. You don't want children. You are perfectly fine the way you are. I took it to mean that if in another life you want children you can if you choose to but you have to decide before you go into that life. You have free will. She said the vow you made was so certain she feared that the child could die. I asked who you vowed this to and she had no answer.. Does that help at all? You are living the life you want now. You and I have grown and evolved so much... We are still evolving. This is not the end.

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03/08/2011

Jason to Sharon

I know this is all true because I met Erik and Robert in the middle east and then we migrated in lives to Egypt, Phonecia, and then Gaul/ Rome ect. up to scandinavia and to Great britain

Yea. So if she ever asks; you can tell Elanor that I am totally cool with it. Erik, my guides, and teacher have my back. And you. i am confident that between us all we can take care of anything. if not I am sure that in the hereafter, between my teacher Z and Robert-they will be able to set me on the correct path.

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03/08/2011

Sharon to Jason

I forgot about z. Let me tell you... While I was reading my angel cards this afternoon I stopped and I put my index finger and drew a z in the carpet when I realized I did it subconsciously and I didn't know why. Yes!!! They will get you back on the right path. Eleanor has been so good to me. I can't imagine anyone better in my life. I am so glad that you are open to it all. When I realized the magnitude of what I has said felt bad. I was just really excited to tell you. I knew what I saw was real. I didn't know why you thought you had never had children before. I just knew that couldn't be possible. I knew I saw you burying a small casket. I told you I was positive.

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03/08/2011

Jason to Sharon

It's all OK. Your vision didn't affect me at all until you told me what you did today. Now I can sense the emotion behind it all. I know it's there if I want to look at it someday.

I was trying to figure out why it hasn't affected me as emotionally as some of my other past life visions. It's cause I've blocked it. and or I realise that there is nothing i can do about it right now.

***********************************************************************************************************************************************

03/08/2011

I once told Robert that I felt like I'd had more lives with Robert than Robert had had with Erik and Erik told him only a handful.

The earliest memory I have of me and Erik was around ancient phonecia. The earliest I can remember of me and Robert was Ancient Eygpt.

Of course you have to take all that with a grain of salt. But I had visions of these two. With Erik I was in a raiding party (thieves) and we lost. But I was young and Erik took pity on me. Or at least that's my idea.

The one with Robert and I. He was a priest and I was a teenager. He was teaching me how to mumify cats and I fainted.

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03/09/2011

Jason to Sharon;

This vision came yesterday and this morning.

It is from the life we lived where my grandma was our mom. (I think)

We got into trouble for either fighting or horsing around.

It was night time. We were around the same age as the previous vision. little kids.

So our mom sat us down infront of a wood burning stove on the floor facing each other. She told us to not move from that spot and don't touch each other and think about how we were behaving. I think the threat against moving was physical punishment.

But when ever she would turn her back we would stick our feet out and touch toes and "toe wrestle" and try not to giggle. Mom secretly knew what we were doing but would pretend not to see or smile at us. We thought it was great secret fun.

I wanted to tell you also about that past life message you gave me.

In the recent past I had a claircongizant episode. In which I said clearly to Robert. "I get the distinct impression that in many of my past lives, I did not have a very long life expectation, It almost feels like I was jumping from brief life to brief life".

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03/09/2011

I finished my Reiki attuenments and training. I've updated my Reiki journal in my musinging. I seem to have acquired 2 more spirits to help me. Or perhaps they are friends of Elizabeths. I am not sure yet.

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03/10/2011

Sharon to Jason

I never actually asked you if you are really really feeling ok after everything I told you on Tuesday. I still feel like I shouldn't have told you that while you were working. It was a very serious thing that I emailed hastily. I am sorry I did that. I hope that your not too upset about it. When I spoke to you over the phone you seemed ok. Now I am having second thoughts.

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03/10/2011

Sigh..............

Sometimes being in psychic family sucks. ha ha.. Just kidding. I am being uber sarcastic because

While no it doesn't bother me as you are involved; OR the timing; OR that it was at work.. That part I don't give a crap about. I am totally cool....

What bugs me is just the vaugeness of Spirit reveals sometimes. I dunno.. I make this crap way more complicated that it needs to be. I wish I was like robert and could pull this shit out of the air sometimes. Ok, that's a super bad attitude.

I am not upset. I am irritated and feeling put out and in such a foul mood because I know what this all really means. It means more work on my part. I am not saying that is wrong. Of course I am suppose to work very hard on the metaphycial crap because only I can pull apart the visions and emotions as it pertains to now and the future......but.....

What I really wanted from "the gang" is something a little more meaty or at the very least acknoledgement beyond Robert. ie. "Jason this is Spirit so and so. We revealed the information because of such and such and it's all real and we love you"..

Sooo.... I know very well that will never happen, but still......

ha ha.. See! I never follow my own channeled advice. Proof what I channel is not me. The real me is just a whiney kid, who fuckin wants a cookie.

Ooooo K....

I am done ranting... I just have to let it out sometimes.

Thanks for listening everyone! I promise to try harder. :)

@ Sis.... You know I don't mean any of that rant in your direction. Cause I only have the love for ya!.

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03/11/2011

Last night I had an unusual experience. I'd been feeling very off because of some recent spiritual revelations. It wasn't them in and of itself, but more it was just one more thing to deal with. So I went to be feeling sort of put out and sick of "it all". I lay in bed and felt like I did a fairly good job of making my peace with it all. Basically apologizing to the gang for my bad attitude.

Well I still wasn't asleep yet; when I was suddenly visited by a new Spirit. Or one I do not remember. She looked Indian, or middle eastern. I am uncertain. But the skin and hair and clothing was that quality. She had long thick luxurious black hair that was tied up in a long thick braid. She was thin, quite striking. And she just appeared next to me I seemed to be sitting above her in something. I am not sure. But my view point was looking down at her; from a close by perspective. And she was reaching out to a cart of people. I feel this was part past life vision/ part symbol. I feel the cart was full of children. Perhaps mine, or perhaps I was on the cart, or perhaps her children were on the cart. The woman seemed extremely familiar. She did not speak. She looked happy yet sad.

I tried to do what my guides and teachers advised in relation to how to treat spirits that come my way. To greet them like people and be polite and real. To give them respect. I tried to do this; although I wasn't very successful at it. But I did try. You see I don't always have good control of what I see. Many times it just hits me in waves and I ride it the best I can. I told her that I didn't know who she was or why she was here, but I told her hello, thank you and I love you. She moved apart in the void and smiled and nodded, and then left.

My gut tells me she was the mother of former children of mine. But really that's my only impression. I was so tied and still not feeling well from a sinis infection. So I didn't look into it further. There was more Spiritual stuff going on as well, but it just involved Erik and my guide trying to cheer me up and help me change my bad attitude.

This morning I was feeling much better and in better spirits-- attitude wise.

The past couple of days really threw me because of a few spiritual experiences I had. One of which was a doozy of a past life revelation. It really kinda thew me into a funky attitude, that I wasn't sure how to deal with.

But this morning on the bus, Emily came to me in vision. I was sitting with my back at Roberts soul home. A huge tree on a grass hill in heaven. I looked up at the clouds and sun rise and just closed my eyes and sighed with lament. Emily then appeared to me. She shimmered and was there. Her skin was pale and soft and was fuzzy with yellow-white light. Like a coronna of heave radiated from inside her. She kneeled between my legs and reached out and rubbed my knees and said, "It's gonna be Ok. Your doing fine. Keep trying. You made a commitment and made promises. You never break your word. You can do this." At this point I was so startled by the clairity that I opened my eyes and the vision blew away.

Upon opening my eyes I felt renewed and at peace. I then proceeded to send Reiki to the list of people I'd gathered.

It's a new day.

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03/11/2011

Sharon to Jason

Goodness that is a lot to take in. I don't even know where to start. I agree a natural progression would be that now you are being visited by past spouses and children... And you think Erik brought them... Why would Erik bring more into your life right now? I don't understand but these spirits may have been wanting to visit you for a long long time but finally now have a chance...

Where do you go from here? Do you want to ground yourself or are your ready for more... It's up to you. You can set limits.

March 10, 2011

Today's channeled messages from Spirit

The most important meditation, the strongest mantra, the best affirmation you can say, do, or participate in is one of self love. It's a key to awareness. It's a key to remembering who you are. Only you can open that door. In the darkest night, during the worst of life; Sit now, and look at yourself in your mind. Look at the key in your hand and just say over and over again. I can. I am worth it. I will try again. I will love me. I will Love you, love others, and let others love me. Go now and seek that. It is a key. A key to life. One of the most important achievements you will ever do! Live love now. Any thing else gets you nothing. Seeking to live love now will get you everything.

---Voice of light on the wind of the minds eye

March 09, 2011

Today's channeled messages from Spirit

Awareness of personal opportunity

Some of the greatest opportunities for Spiritual self advancement can be had by simply changing ones attitude. Turn your concentration on not what is wrong with the world but how you can help. How you can help others help bring about change.

Opportunity reveals itself all the time. This happens with those around you, and those you don't know. Cultivate the positive attitude you create for yourself. Use strength of will and bravery to tie yourself to desired thought. Look at your ill feelings in the face and say with all your might that they are not for you. Pass out trust, honesty and love with sincerity. Always strive to hold this to your mind.

You might not see the result or chain reaction of such taken opportunities, but it will cause real effects. It is the striving of these creative actions for the greater good that will change your world into a place of your desire. Person by person this will happen.

You can not force this realization of awareness on anyone or any group. But only by manifesting this awareness upon yourself can you hope to bring awareness upon others through you. Strive to radiate light from your highest self outward onto others in your daily life. In seeking this you will act out in a way that is for the greater good.

--Voices of Spirit--

Free will as a path to light and the creative force of change.

"So many people expect those in Spirit to hand them answers and fix what they perceive to be wrong with the world they live in. As Erik once said, "You expect Spirit to give you cheat codes to the game of life, you want Spirit to tell you what to do." What is special about the human condition is that within each of you is the divine spark of Creation. This combined with free will is the ultimate self liberator for not only yourselves but for your societies and world. Every positive change you make within yourself that you seek to share with others that is based in love will help change your world. How do you want to change your world?

So many people fall into the cycle of despair, blame, revulsion of a world outside of themselves. A world they perceive 'As-is'. A world of pain, suffering and unchanging despair. And yet they will not do the reflective work to try to understand. Why? They rail at Spirit and do not ask for answers; but no, they demand answers. The problem with this path; the path they do not want to explore, is that the answers have never been from outside of their lives but within. This is because they do not really believe they are divine beings. The do not want to believe in ultimate free will or the power of individual creation.

Every person, every group, every society, every world has this power of divine manifestation. A choice. A choice to live in the dark selfish ego, or the choice to follow the higher self that seeks experiences of light for the greater good. Every choice has and effect. Choose your lower self and it has consequences on your life, the lives around you, the lives of society, the lives of your country and world. This has a cumulative effect along a time line.

So truly you ARE your brothers keeper. This is another example of ultimate free will. By uplifting yourself to it's highest state, you will uplift others, who will uplift others. But this is a choice. An experience chosen. No matter how far removed from you and your reality, it is how experiences come into being. You and those around you may not have chosen the horrible negative experiences others endure. But others with just as much free will as you; Have done so. Which in turn caused chain reactions of cause and effect throughout your reality.

When you expect, no demand Spirit to change these experiences due to your discomfort or despair you take away your free will and power of personal creation. This may be fine with you. And that in of it self is your choice as well.

This does not mean that you have to take the world on your shoulders. This does not mean that you have to lament or despair at your inability to effect positive change in your world. But it does mean that your growing awareness necessitates personal introspection and responsibility for your own life and how it affects those around you.

Despair not, For by being a light unto yourself, you will be a light unto others. This will eventually bring light to your world. This will change the chain reactions of the world you live in from negative to ones of love "

--CE Angels--

March 08, 2011

One way spiritual progress can be understood is by how well you recognize opportunities. One perception of "reward" is seeing more opportunities for service to others. Therefore expanding your opportunity to live up to expressions of your highest self.

To know a soul you must approach not from curiosity but from reverence, comprehension and sympathy to every path. Seek to see and help. So not criticize others from your point of view but by knowing and loving them.

March 07, 2011

The intelligent and intentional use of your imagination directed to the idea, perception, and belief in mental imagery is enough to connect with the ethereal and astral realms of your body in degree to your personal vibration. Always examine with great care your intent, approach and expectations of any such endeavor. Do not seek connections if you hold onto undesirable emotion and or thought. So often distraction of intent occurs. This is due to mind and memory association leaps. Where thought jumps from event to event along a chain of connections until the original intent is lost. TO break this, carefully examine any ensuing thought that makes one uncomfortable or reveals a less than desirable emotion. Examine the origin of this message and why and where it might come from. Upon realization of this you can move away from that thought and feeling that does not serve you. If you find this too difficult. Hold on to your desire to change and call out to LIGHT for help. You must be active not passive. Think not how we or you can help yourself in in Spirit, but how you can help others in Spirit. Hold not the light around you to raise your vibration but seek to let the light fill you and all your being with the power of love. Do not ask how can I see, but ask how can I help? How can I see more clearly so that Love shines Through me?

-- words from my Spirit Teacher

March 07, 2011

I had a pretty good weekend. My 4th trance channeling practice turned a funny page. The hour long lesson went great! But that was because I stuck to doing what I've always done. What I just DO. That being regular telepathic dictation, and clairvoyant visions. Nothing happened in the "Trance" department. Just like last week.

My guides said this was a big lesson for me because they had an important message for me. They said, "You Need to work on what is now, and not what you think should be. don't have expectations of stuff you don't know about yet, because then you will not know what to do. Work on what you know and you'll be guided to do what you need to for the next step when the time is right."

Basically I was trying to force the experiences on my timetable, not theirs. They said the problem was that I wanted to change the way I receive Spirit messages. That I wanted to switch from the gifts I was given to other types I wasn't ready for.

A pointed reminder that things happen on their terms not mine, AND the experience comes before the lesson. Knowing "them" the way I do, I am sure they sneak the next lesson on me out of the blue.

Sigh....

Well, I am still committed to meeting with my Guide Lydia and my soul brothers in Spirit once a week for channeling and vision practice, but I guess I will just have to approach it without expectation.. hmmm..

March 04, 2011

"It would be inappropriate for humanity to judge what extent any precieved failings affect Spiritual development. For mankind most frequently looks out from clouded canyons of existence. While we look down and out with the full light of the heavens. In many cases under the surface of perception the soul contains aspects of such quality that far out way any ill precieved impressions. Look within yourself and seek the decision that is in the best interest of all. For within this desire you will do what is best for you." --Spirit

March 03, 2011

"There are those who do not wish to pray. There are those who find it difficult to study. There are those who find meditation impossible. This does not matter. What can be done is to work at something that meshes with their idea of who their highest self IS. Do something for their neighbor. That doesn't mean that they should totally abandon all other methods of spiritual activity. For it is good to work on every part of our natures. "

--Voices of Spirit

"Do not worry that you will become so engrossed in life that you will not notice your loved ones in Spirit. They are still aware of you. While your mind may be distracted. And while they may be busy in another existence; Any thought sent their way will be detected. And while they may not be able to focus on you right then, they will hear you and send out their love and attention." --- Voices of Spirit

What are some good Spiritual goals to strive for? (question)

-"Striving for perfection of your individual perception of physical and mental health in your current environment

-Development of Unselfish purpose

-Charity in line with your purpose

-Understanding and contemplation through acceptance of all existences

-Truthfulness in line with understanding and awareness of limited perspectives

-Faith and duty to Karma, outside of fear based emotions

-Courage in every situation

-Seeking to develop perception of one's spiritual bodies

-Sympathy for and appreciation of everything in subjective and objective temporary existences in relation to the Spiritual realms.

-Master the following to your highest self perception: body, inner and outer senses, faults, pain, mind, intellect, spirit, energy, thoughts, emotions, will, ego, desires, dreams

This seems an impossible task. What and how can I possibly strive to any of this, I am nobody! (question)

---"Look out upon your entire world. Look at the entire globe. Look through all of history that you can comprehend. Billions and billions of souls. So many undeveloped and unaware. But in all those winking lights, sparks of soul, little lights reflecting the divine source, in all that thick clamor there are bright flames approaching. Even at great distances your light burns bright and lights the way for your fellow mankind. These flames are your gathering awareness of Spirit. You are beacons in the dark. Now stop looking out into the dark at their lights; and focus on your inner flame, and grow your light. Feed it greater and greater things so that your light shines for all. Fear not that you will not be seen. Trust in yourself. Your very desire for change was the wind that made your inner spark burst with divine flame! Angles of love come to you now."-- Voices of Angels

March 02, 2011

I found out who the bed thumper was. I called Robert on the phone. It was Jillian. She is Erik's partner/spouse. She was just stopping by to say thank you to me for something and to tease me. Total affection. She said it was like she was rubbing her hands on my feet and on the underside was moving her finger up and down and it was manifesting on the mattress.

It all turned out to be very funny. My guides were at first going to make me figure it out on my own and not tell Robert, but Jillian took pity on me and spilled the beans and told us all. :) I am very relieved and pleased.

But the whole situation brings to mind a few things. 1) that I need to follow the rule: Do unto others as you'd have them do unto you. This holds true for Spirits as well. 2) Treat Spirits with curteousy and respect and thankfulness 3) If they are bothering you, talk to them as people and do not express fear based emotions at them.

March 01, 2011

Wow, It's not often any more that I have an unknown paranormal event to relate here.

But I've got one that has me stumped!

Last night when I got home from work I started noticing a lot of "beyond the norm" Spirit movement, light and shadow. As well, flashes of blue and white-rods and plasma shapes.

Then when I went to bed and I felt what seemed to be be energy around my feet. Similar to what Erik does when he tries to tickle them. Then all of a sudden there was a thrumming thumping directly under them "within" the mattress. It's a select number bed. So they are air bellows made out of vulcanized rubber. It was as if someone was rubbing their fingers on the inside of the rubber and it made a skidding thumping sound. Over and over again. I changed feet positions and it followed my feet. Both the locale of the noise; which by the way had a physical counter part of vibration and pressure from the thump. And the energy. I felt it AND heard it in 3D as well as the energy pressure and tingles around my feet. "under the covers".

I am pretty sure is was not Erik. I cast my vision out for him and the guides and got a blank. Only got mind speech from them that I was fine. But no mental images.

I think it may have been someone visiting my guides and that my guides were in teaching mode again. The energy around my feet was the same as Erik demonstrates, but the side of my face wasn't buzzing and he was not talking. Usually when he teases me I am able to interact clairvoyently and audently with him. There was none of that. Also I don't mind Erik tapping, but I don't want my bed messed with. Some of the more scary experiences of mine involved my bed. And it really pisses me off when my bed is messed with by someone other than my spirit family. And if they do I expect them to announce their presence clearly, Via affection or something I am familiar with. I'd been sensing a lot of unusual movement and light and shadow phenomena all evening. In fact I noticed it was a lot more than what usually happens.

What I should have done was taken the time to Spiritually recenter, shield, and connect to my guides. But I was so frickn sleepy and just wanted to sleep; I got really pissed off. I should have acknowledged whomever it was and talked to my guides but I only mentally yelled at all of them and pitched a fit!

My appoligies to them for being a shit.

I am ccing Robert in case whomever it was want to tell me something. I kind of doubt it. I suspect it was just someone visiting with my guides. I get a lot of that actually.

Sigh.....

That's one of the things that drives me nuts about spirit communication in general. Our perspectives on what is really going on or the big picture is so infinitesimally small, I always feel left out of the loop. Sometimes I just feel so frickin out of it. Like last night with whomever was in my house. I know there was a good reason, just for whatever reason they are not saying. This is extremely common. It's like they say, "Ok. For this time and place we are only going to give you this spoonful. Then maybe tomorrow we'll give you the jar.