Spiritual Loneliness

Q)

Loneliness:

Why does becoming more Spiritually aware make me feel so lonely. I was happier when i was clueless.

A)

I know what you feel like.

Loneliness a feeling that we are are alone un joined and lacking support. It drags at my soul, it tares tears across my cheeks and burns my skin. My heart aches, squeezing tight hardness. I can't see anything but the spinning darkness of silence in the booming pain of life.

Thinking on my experience, each at a time. I cry and wish I didn't feel this. I don't think anyone would understand. I don't think anyone would want to be near me. Who am I? Why? Why?

What I know is that I own or reject the understanding of each experience. I can own it or look away. I may not fully see the vista of who I am in each moment of meaning. But I know I am there. I am still here. And I am worth knowing. I am worth Understanding. I have a lot to offer, even if it's just me.

I can own my experience. I am not it, but it can be a part of who I am. And I am on a great journey.

This Knowing, these connections, these moments that hurt so much, I know there is more.

The quiet assurance that we are all one, It should be the embrace of peace, The utter abandonment of understanding.

I do not know. All I know is that even in utter abandonment I can still feel love. I can still feel me. I know that I am still here. Answers I don't have. Questions surround me. I can't help but pick at them. With so many questions, I wonder if there are just as many answers yet for me to discover. Even alone, I feel the burning to share this journey.

I think, The gentle radiating joy, The deepest quietest waters reflect the brightest stars. I think you are one of those stars and your light touches me. I think your light helps me see me. I think this is one of those answers. One of those answers that eases the loneliness in my own life.