October 2012

October 31, 2012

Happy Halloween everyone. Nikki who is a medium and a good Angelic channeler; she and I are going to be putting together a section here on the website on Angels. We are not quite sure yet how it will be, but we've been talking about it. For example today we had the following conversation with her Guardian Angel Elle.

Talks with Spirit.

Jason chats with Nikki (angelic channeler) about life:

Nikki channels her Guardian Angel Elle: ---

Nikki:

"Elle do our Guardian angels stay with us from incarnation to incarnation."

Elle:

"Yes, we are with your soul indefinitely. We are your record keeper, your guide, your connection to your soul. As an aspect of your higher self, we too are part of every planning process and therefore every incarnation. It is with our divine connection that we assist you in making choices that lead to soul growth not just for you but for the greater good of the group and all those connected to divine light. As the number of incarnations multiply the higher self often will access the records to recall past decisions, memories, experiences. We are the record keeper the messenger who records all of your experiences for the records. We help you access those memories especially when they will benefit you. A subtle reminder of all that you have accomplished can be very rewarding. IT can also keep you on a path that you have agreed to experiences. There are no coincidences, your thoughts are very much your memories. Your dreams are very much your past. What comes to mind quickly is that which is engrained in the records. I cannot imagine a separation from your soul. Even when you spend time in the afterlife, it is with our help and guidance that you do your work and plan with other souls. Once we become a continual part of your daily routine, it is much easier to feel your joy and help you focus on the love and joy you wish to experience. You are love, you are a hard worker. I am here, now and for eternity. we are one, I am a part of you and you a part of me."

Jason to Nikki:

"And this validates some of the other stuff I've seen online, stuff we've both channeled and some of the visuals I've seen. -- cool."

Nikki to Jason:

" I have never felt so sure of what I got. This was for sure my best connection to her. I even saw her come in as a yellow light."

Jason to Nikki:

"Some of the visuals, I've had, and some of the stuff I've read seem to indicate that GA, are actually meshed in the energetic ties that bind our higher self to the various energy bodies to the various life facets. And that the GA's help hold (something?) until we are able to fully stop incarnating and reintegrate with our higherself. Almost as if they were a container, casing, or lock box. The visual I got was angel wings surrounding and encasing our energy cords. Don't know what of all that is literal or not. So would you say that the relationship between angel and incarnation's consciousness/soul is one of a symbiotic nature? Or symbiosis? Are all souls co-created with an angelic counterpart? And one can not exist without the other? Are these like two self sustaining organisms that exist separately, but also co-exist for creative manifestation?"

Nikki to Jason:

"All of us has an angelic connection. Is that just another facet of our soul. We are all a part of it all, the angels, every thing, they are a part of us, and we can never be apart. We as incarnates, feel like our angel aspect is separate, but in reality it is a part of our soul. Once we have attained all that we can and all that we care to, we will merge/join with our angel and be that divine energy. I'm not sure I really know the answer, but Elle is part of me. I hope she is the very best part of me and at some point I will mirror her and we will be one. My legs are tingling so much they feel numb lol.... There are others too. There are archangels, and others. They are a bit different, energy wise, function, how they interact, how they are perceived.. . This has to really be comforting to you Jason,. I mean, there should be no fear at all in knowing that your angel is part of you. How awesome that we have that capability and of course they could never judge,... they ARE us. No action, no bad choice, nothing about us surprises them, they know because they are part of us!"

**(now I start to playfully tease Nikki)

Jason to Nikki:

"Butttt buttt I don't wannnnaaaa be an angel. I wanna be a princess..... sniff snifff... pout... "

Nikki to Jason:

"oh, your angel name is princess. Pink Princess. You are both, you are special :)"

Jason to Nikki:

"YEA!!!

I get to have feathers AND a crown!!! woowwoot.."

Jason to Nikki:

"Ok. serious now, :) Sooo....hypothetical..opinion.

...to the clairvoent is ones angel always going to appear as their gender? why is the only images ive ever gotten an old man or a ball of light.....just random thoughts... Of course, ive only ever tried a couple times..."

Nikki to Jason:

"You get whatever makes you comfortable. Although for years I thought my GA was Gerard. Called him Jer.--"

Jason to Nikki:

"I've always picked up mediumistally that the GA's are plugged in right below the the level you stop incarnating.. where ever.... the heck that is.. ha ha.. "

Nikki to Jason:

"That is all so over my head. I wonder if I am always this narrow minded? I just cant seem to focus or care."

Jason to Nikki:

"No, it just means you focus on what matters..... and your not a total dork-ess like me! :) (wink) I do work in academia after-all.. the bastion of all dork-dom.... ha ha.....I will say, I have a tendency to make things more complicated than they need to be.

Erik m., always says to me, "make it simple" and you all do a pretty good job of helping. It's about the message message message

What was it Erik said to me the other day....

Erik said,

"Many people spend their whole lives trying to iron out the wrinkles they "think" they see. They have this inner need to feel their way through life, but instead of 'allowing' themselves to do it, they get lost in their head trying to analyses the hell out of it. They categorize, label, judge, evaluate, organize, and try to make what they feel mesh with experiences they haven't even looked at yet. Someone told them 1+1=2, A,B, C, then D... but the thing with life, the soul and every thing under creation is that 1+1 can = D. And that doesn't mean your dumb, it means your Divine. It's not that there is anything to figure out, It's that your remembering to feel yourself."

October 30, 2012

What is not looked at, healed, or released grows. It might seem counter intuitive to reality. You know that saying, the watched pot never boils? Look at your emotions rather than letting them boil. There is a huge difference with using a fine intentful simmer and having to clean up a mess.

***

If you sometimes catch yourself feeling stupid, a screw up or unworthy you need to know you are not alone, nor do you need to become disabled by it. These feelings often come from self judgement derived from a sense of lack or desire.

Sometimes what we desire is not really something we need or even would wish, It is actually something we only think we need. This could come about due to many reasons. Expectations, beliefs, perceptions, assumptions born from feelings.

Other times these feelings come as a result of causes, many co-created with others. Such as childhood experiences. In many ways we can internalize what happens in our early years and our subconscious translate them into directions and value statements about where we are headed, our lives, and who we are. So we end up having erroneous core beliefs about ourselves. Later on in life we develop these deep feelings of lack and unworth into little behaviors that make us seem a bit like we are trying to control everyone and every situation. It's not that we mean to be this way, but that we are often just trying to protect ourselves. The intensity you feel anxiety, or this inner resistance to someone or a situation you don't like is going to give you an idea of just how deep and how far back these feelings of desire and expectation go back. In fact they may even be long patterns from past lives as well. There is almost always a reason behind experience and perception of it. Very often they are two different things. The point is not in the experience, but what we come to think about it all, and how we feel about ourselves going through it. Very often in life it's not that we are seeking to control the situation or protect ourselves, but that we desire approval and seek protection in others, as a value statement of worth. Instead of addressing that root cause and belief about ourselves, we obsess over creating ways to fulfill our expectations of a life outside of ourselves making us whole.

I don't know about you, but this is something I run into in my own life all the time. I've often asked my self; Am I using others reactions and emotions as a measuring tool for self worth, or assessment, or an evaluation? Are their behaviors a litness test of my experience? How does one keep from going over board and becoming a cold uncaring person? It really bugs me sometimes....A lot of the time I hear from Spirit, "others reactions are none of your business" to which I've always been slightly taken aback at their abruptness......well.. yeah.. ok. I get that, ... But whats a comforting way of saying that? I want to move into feeling truth in this, And I know this stuff isn't just me. I see it in people all around me too. How does one keep from going over board and becoming a cold uncaring person?

One of my Spirit gang said,

"When people do not fill your expectations they are often those that are in your life for singular reasons. You are drawn to certain people for a reason. Let it go, let them in that situation go. Even if you need to let them go, that's ok. Just have gratitude that they were able to help you look at your heart, and you were able to help them, even should you not understand it. Approach them as you would want to be treated. When there is a connection and when you are being guided, the experiences will flow, they will resonate and you will feel joy. Sometimes the lesson is is about giving, not receiving. Those are the times that you will feel it is time to move on. Your sense of value, lack or worth has nothing to do with it, It's about where your focus is. It's about remembering your inner joy. Do you do this with love, or fear? Do you give into chaos of unlooked at feelings, or do you try to force situations based on fear? Or do you try to balance it all out with considered intent? How do you feel? Who are you now? This is your journey, do what makes you happy."

I've often asked myself, Am I just resigning myself to feeling this way? Or am I allowing them to run all over me? What's the difference between emotional and behavioral resignation and acceptance and allowance?

I asked one of my friends these very questions and she said,

"When I think of emotional resignation, to me it means giving up, saying "uncle"; stopping the resistance I feel or that I'm fighting. Acceptance and allowance feels easier to me; it feels like going with the flow, accepting that in order for things to happen, its all a path; accepting that some pain and resistance might need to be felt along the way."

Another friend of mine said,

"Someday you are going to realize; When you truly know that no one can make you believe anything about yourself; You have to choose it or choose who you really are on the inside. You'll realize that only you, have the power to create your ultimate reality. They are not responsible for your soul's path, and it's plans. When you understand that you are your life's creator, you will have realized just how awesome you really are."......"Now that's going to really upset a lot of people. They've been told that life is beyond them, they can't possibly be held responsible for it, because it was divine will, divine plan, or that they deserve it. But I'll tell you what. They deserve the liberation loving themselves brings. Worth isn't defined by anything other than the love one is willing to give themselves. Sometimes they wont understand this until it feels like they have none to give. Sometimes it means seemingly not receiving any to understand just how much there is to give. Even at it' most basic core level, one can find a spot in life where compassion can be given, felt, or shared. It's in that moment that a spark is going to happen and the floodgates of opportunity will open and love will pour in and out. When you are able to realize these kinds of processes in your life, you come to realize that you are already empowered with everything you need in life. It's always up to us to mirror this in our beliefs no matter what those beliefs are, we can enact them to a higher state of being. Believe that about yourself, you can help change the wold."

***

To watch over your dearest and let them discover that its not fear that lurks, but what love waits beyond fear, beyond one's inner dragons, is one of the greatest gifts of self empowerment you can give. For to allow them this chance at personal.transformation is to forever change their reality.

October 29, 2012

Until the colors of your life become lick-able and all you want to do is smell every moment,... you haven't lived enough. Let go of the anxiety. The passion will find you again.

***

The labels, the words, and the meanings we assign to them while in human form are often a gestalt of highly symbolic context. Frequent mis-characterizations of viewed reality, overrides our perception and meaning is grossly misconstrued.

***

To the student:

Remember. You will manifest more of what you focus on. Change your focus, do not assume, do not jump to conclusions, do not assume what you feel or sense is literal, or what your fears and root beliefs tell you. You can not judge spirit intention, action nor identity by Clairsentience alone. It would be a gross misjudgement. It would be like asking a blind man to judge color by feeling the sun. Time and time again, we are told by Spirit that sensing energy is not an indicator of anything other than presence. But that does not even mean an indication of energy body or form. It is simply energy. Until you learn subtle discernment you could be sensing a an energy body, a thought, a thought form, a questing communication feed, a vortex, a entity, emotions, a projection, connecting lines or others aura's, and more! And the skin is not alone in sensing these energies. Just as your physical body has "systems" of related organs. So too does your energy bodies and all the structures that connect them to your physical body. It would be an error to assume what you are sensing is some how limited to one structure, organ or pathway. Be patient. Mastering your whole self takes many lifetimes. No experience is an island, nor is it limited by one view. With each experience will come the understanding of not ony how it seems physically, but how it is perceived emotionally, mentally, energetically; from your waking conscious mind, your sub conscious, and all your other energy forms; as well as your past, present, future, and alternative lives; as well as the view of others reflected back to you. It is best not to worry and focus on what resonates with your heart. You did not come to this life to fail. You can not but help experience yourself. Set your intent. Set your boundaries. Develop perception, discernment, listen, quiet your mind and fill your vision. Use your imagination to take you beyond life as you saw it, and trust that you are surrounded by love. Strive to live to your highest possible self.

***

Just as it is easy to misjudge and label clair, and psychic experience. It is easy to misjudge relationships here on Earth.

Not as good or bad, but in assumptions based on the feelings had in this life; in comparison to the nature of their reality on the other side. Not only that, but to their weight in relation to the higherself and their ultimate reality. Many are those who look outside their hearts for that one who will complete the feelings of lack, longing, and desire withing their hearts. Some, feel that they can and will or have achieved this. It is a wonderful experience. They should embrace their joy as it suits them. Much has been written about such relationships. Much has been thought, and said about it. But know this. The chain of your lives are far greater than you can ever imagine. What is revealed is only done so as it relates to what you are focusing on in this life. Your soul has many relationships. In each life, the value you assign to them is not necessarily the same that you would assign it with all of your prelife cognitive faculties operating in full conscious awareness. For example relationships are frequently contractual agreements made between members of soul groups or soul associations. Many times in life those who hurt us the most are often, on a soul level, our most beloved ones. For only they would agree to endure the pain and participate in the painful role playing planed upon. Other times in life, a beloved spouse, lover, or friends stands on equal emotional ground as others from past lives. To them theirs is not necessarily any sense of jealousy, ownership, or place of hierarchy in love. Spiritual interaction is always a marriage of intention, focus, and harmony of like states of being. Romantic notions of earth life can and does frequently get participated in, but know this. There does come a stage to the soul focus where all such belonging falls away to the greater reality of unification with all. Better to let go of worry and love yourself the best you can. Then you will attract what you need, as opposed to what you think you want. Take a look at what has been said in my Q & A's and Articles for more.

***

Many times that which we fear is really nothing to be fearful of. It simply seems fearsome because we are being drawn to focus on what we need to re-think, re-view, re-see, heal, deal with, or address issues of perception. When looked at with new points of view, what once seemed of fear will then be remembered as something of beauty.

***

Just because something seems literal, linear, and real; Doesn't mean that there isn't more going on. Don't pay any attention to the man behind the curtain. Look to the man in the mirror and see what is in your heart.

***

To the student:

When you encounter images that you are unable to take hold of and manipulate, when you lack control; know they are not your thought forms. You do not own them. But also know this. This does not mean that they are out to get you. These images are often symbolic in the extreme or so simple that you have not given thought to it. These are projected by your higherself, your guides, your angels, etc., many times as well....created, drawn together from your emotions as a reflection of your state of being. A signal, a note, an indication of direction. Take a look at dream symbology for example. Many meanings in context. Should you fear.....visualize a being made of white light. This represents your guardian angel. How it looks matters not. Now picture yourself standing next to and within that light. And hold that image. Nothing more. Just focus on that. Let yourself feel it.

***

Be aware of multiple meanings when dealing with Spirit. I'll give you an example. The other morning I woke up early and was in deep conversation with Eric. I asked him what time it was. Instead of telling me a time; He gave me the disembodied sound of morning birds chirping at dawn. For me, that meant between 5-6am.

***

I have found that energy work is never a singular experience, nor one that is black or white, or of one cause, one effect. It is a mix of interactions a gestalt of experience. What I mean by that is that the channeler, is always dealing with multiple causes to achieve an effect. What power, use, and awareness those modalities and tools have is dependent on the power our beliefs give to them. Depending on the energy that is co-created, some gain a type of self awareness and individuality. For example: Past lives, alternate lives, group consciousness, co-created experience, life plans, pre-life intention, free will, the pre-agreed upon laws of the world we have chosen to incarnate in, the awareness of the incarnate self--and--the disincarnate soul, the experience level of the higher self, the balance or imbalance of self generated and co-generated karmic energy.

***

What is my soul like?

Imagine the most intricate crystal you can picture in your mind. A diamond, a prism. Visualize if you will that has more facets than you can possible see. You try as you might, but there are so many cuts that you don't understand how it was made. You can hold it in your hands, turning it with your fingers, but your eyes can not hold on to any one group of them. You are in awe. Now daydream if you will. Imagine that you are holding that crystal up to the sunlight. It seems to fill with the light and as you turn it in your hand it seems to glow as if it has somehow captured the light and now owns it. Now imagine if you can that you move your body ever so slightly while holding it in the light and you move your gaze to a wall. You see the crystals light reflected and refracted onto the wall in a million glinting rainbows. You are struck still with it's power of transformation. Know this. You are that crystal. The light of All that IS shines through you as you. Every facet is an aspect of yourself, a Unique face through which the light projects out a rainbow of light. This rainbow is not a singular thing, but it is a personality. Within that personality is a broad spectrum of hued life's and experiences, each with their own color, range and vibration. Some are in line next to each other, and some only viewable with other senses beyond the visible human range, but all a part of the same spectrum of light from the facets of your soul.

***

Don't put expectations on what you are willing to give, serve or do for others or you will limit your experience by the reactions you judge from desire. Better to set your intention from the start. Reaffirm it through actions in that you have approached others needs as fufilling the joy inside of yourself. If you are honest with yourself, you can let go of worry, frustration, and wishes, as something that is not your problem. Feel what really is you, and you will never be limited by expectation.

You will be freed by the degree that you see yourself in another.

Responding to that is your love.

That is who you are.

October 26, 2012

Trust is just comfort with an inner reality or knowings. Belief is acceptance of it. Understanding is simply living it....(wink)

***

Focus on YOUR journey

Make the best of LIFE

Find YOUR joy

You only get to be this PERSON once.

LIVE what you can create the best you can

Be your JOY

***

The more you worry over what you are not, the greater your anxiety will be over what you fear about yourself. Rather, be brave enough to embrace what you are. In this light, fear will have no ground before your excitement to explore more of yourself. Anxiety will turn to comfort, as you remember more and more of who you always were.

***

Don't worry about those parts of you that lurk. They are not waiting to jump out at you, rather you are simply eager to see how you are going to express them in this new life.

***

No one should beat themselves up for failure to become an aesthetic or what they think a saint should be. We are not here to give up on life, we are here to experience ourselves and balance the mastery of each expression of our true self, in whatever we explore. Who is braver, the man who abandons the life he fears and worries about, or the woman who embraces her situation so that she may transform herself and whatever, whomever she touches? Life goes on, with each new creation. You can create too. You have all eternity, not in the here and after, but in each new moment. Now.

***

The madness of pain is often the path to healing, even should it be caused, much can be cured by the knowing parent letting the child experience the hard path. Some times understanding can only be gained through hard won personal experience. Let not guilt touch the light of compassionate patience. All healing comes at the right time and place in each heart. It's not meant to be confusing, just a comfort as you look at your own experience. You are not alone, nor is anyone else. You are with them.

***

Random humor:

So last night it was raining, I had a massive arthritis flair up and a wicked sinus headache. I was laying on the basement futon in the dark with one arm curled over my eyes, on my side, sort of groaning to myself. I could feel spirits in the room. One or two of the energies touching me. I felt someone at my head. I could feel the warm tingling pressure on my temple and crown. I could also feel the same sensation on my feet only it was undulating while pressed against my bare feet. My head hurt too much to project and see who it was. So I just told them that I felt like crap, and then started making random pointless bored yet in pain chatter. It was the usual crowd. Erik m was at my feet. Jillian was also there. They kept interrupting me and telling me to go to sleep. Jillian and I were having fun teasing Erik. And Erik starting yukking it up by showing himself as "slimer" the green gooey ghost busters ghost. Have you see that? It's a fat ugly little spirit with lots of belly rolls and no feet and a huge ridiculous smile. Who drools slimey spit. And it very playful, silly, and the most absurd appetite for junk food. In any case he was acting like slimmer and he's float over me and threaten to lick me and drool on me, and ask me if I wanted hug. Then he'd show me him as slimer and act like he was hugging me and I would pass through him and get goo all over me, and he'd cackled and laugh... And then he'd make rude comments like, 'do you wanna touch slimers titties... sigh.. I was all, 'you do know I think your totally disgusting right?' and he was all, 'touuucch maaa tittites..... and then he'd laugh....sigh...Why do all brothers have to torment their sibs? I am teasing of course, I thought he was so funny. Jillian agreed to help hold him down while I beat hit butt. oh well, some day! ha ha...

Oh, and for some reason I woke up this morning dreaming of that movie with the pooka in it... what was it Harvey?

Did you know when I was a toddler, my best friend was a green rabbit that no one could see and it talked?

My mother told me I was like Harvey. She said it was my pooka. What mother tells their little kid that? ha ha...

I will never understand how she could go from that sense of humor to thinking Erik was the devil out to get me.... lol!

fyi

Pooka is eastern European for a fairy familiar that can be benevolent or evil

Takes animal form, sometimes rides away with children

Harvey is an old classic b & w movie about a crazy guy that saw a talking 6 foot + rabbit

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harvey_%28movie%29

Me and my pooka

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_XFv58YaCe5Q/StkzwCm-8iI/AAAAAAAACSA/_bkjusjILyc/s400/Harvey+the+Pooka.jpg

***

I am content in whatever life I find myself, as I always have opportunity to realize myself.

What makes me happy is that while in that life I can create more opportunity.

My joy is that I can share this.

***

There is something to love in every experience, even if all I can see is myself in you. For that I am grateful to you.

***

What is better, The abandonment to the stillness of meditation or the surrender to dedication of intent?

In silence one may strive to Be, but it is only by understanding what love you are capable of in each moment of every experience that you will understand who you are.

***

Have a great weekend everyone!

October 25, 2012

I felt moved to repost an old message from Erik to the C.E. Community.

Erik on Life's pain; Self-Empowerment as a path to Creation:

Please know what you are going through is a journey of self empowerment. A journey to remember who you are. It is about 'Knowing'. Knowing that you just are. What you are. What you want to be. You are at the crossroads, the crossroads of self empowerment. There is now a single action you can take. Creative thought backed by intent which leads to purposeful living. All else leads to inaction and loss of self.

So much of your past actions is based on others dictating their will for you. For many this is enough. People run to it. This is because being told what to do, what to think, eliminates the need work at developing intent. Your free will. It is a thoughtless endeavor they run to. But if you think about what you truly want you'll examine how you feel. Then you can choose with freedom a path acting under your own authority.

It is when you live under other's will that you run into problems. Do you really take to heart what others say about your life? Do you trust them? Or are you going to trust yourself? What do YOU have to say? Your decisions create YOU now. Are you OK with that? This is not some slot machine, you are the programmer. Do your wishes and decisions represent who you wish to be?

You have to be brave. Cause you are going to have to think and decide... or not. Making judgments and decisions about you, life, and the world around you is really friggin hard. But this is you manifesting creation. The very moment of creation. Yup, you've got that power! There will be plenty of times you'll have to say, "I don't know., I don't know how, I don't understand." But your gonna have to decide and choose an action or inaction.

Such a choice - A choice is an example of the power of creation. That which is Divine in you. Your free will. It is creation and by deliberately creating you are aware and truly alive. To be aware of self desire is to be self created. Self made. Most people don't care. That's cool. There is no judgment about this. It's your choice, your state of being.

Self creation without fear is one of the very foundations of existence. It is a great journey.

Seekers of external validation of Spirit seldom are ready for this inner decision. Seldom are they ready for personal self created truth. Who do you think you are? What are you? Do you want to remember? Do you want to know? Will you take steps to find out?

Others can cheer you on and listen but, this is part of the journey. That decision must be made inside of each of us. You might get mad and say, "why bother- If none of it matters and it's all up to me, who cares?"

The answer is, "It's up to you". You know that saying, "Know thyself" You think it's just some religious crap? Know thyself OR do nothing. Live consciously or unconsciously. You've been doing this forever to various degrees of participation. Since you were born! Now! Tomorrow! and after this life too...Most of your life you've lived with the effects of your circumstances but not bothering to do anything about what you want. Now you are becoming more. That's why you're having such a hard time. Your fighting your desire for self empowerment. This is conscious living. This is self creation. This is awesome. Keep going!

Do not lie to yourself with thoughts of meaningless life. You give life meaning, not anyone else. Seek your truth, your own truth and OWN it. You seek truth... STOP... Tell your own truth.... You can't find truth? ... STOP... Just be....Because you are perfect. Make it your motto. The more you believe this the more you will create. The more you create the more you can share with others. I know you hurt, but be patient You are waking up. Understand and create that which you wish to be in the highest version of yourself.

I know you feel overwhelmed but be strong. You can fight for it. Fight for life and live it now. Just feel. It's OK to be sad, cry, scream, complain, hate it, but just live. Feel it through and keep seeking what you want. You can find it. Along the way you can show others and help them see that they are not alone.

Lots of love,

Erik

October 24, 2012

*Note: I know many C.E. readers often express grief, pain, and sadness over life, and their desire to not come back for more. I hope you all take some comfort in knowing you are surrounded by love always. You are never alone in this world or in the here after. The bonds we make out of love never die. Surround yourself with this circle of light.

Channeling practice with Friends:

(AKA: spooky Pictionary and some woowoo junk)

Cont...

Intro:

Lets get together with our guides, spirit friends/family and Erik (aka: the gang) and practice channeling. Mind’s eye (clairvoyance) and mind speech/thought (subjective-clairaudience). Every now and then I like to try to ask friends and fellow CE readers to take part as well. Kind of like a group game. It can be a lot of fun to see how spirit translates meaning into different symbols, images and mental-words/thought and still maintain message themes. Usually we'll have a topic, theme or symbol and we'll ask those in Spirit to give us mind’s eye visuals etc. about it. Then we will record the experience and share with each other.

Instructions:

Today's theme is " insert theme "

Step one:

Go to a space where you won’t be interrupted for 5-10 min. *(note: in this instance I don’t do any formal connection techniques-although you can- because I am only practicing for me with my guides/family)

Step two:

Visualize an empty space in your head. Describe it in writing

Step three:

Visualize Spirit of your choice in the space by their self. Describe it.

Step four:

Treat that image as the Spirit and separate from you. Kind of, up, out, and away from you, as if you were viewing either in the room with them, or from a distance. Hold that image in your mind’s eye and then “think AT it" as if you were talking to them.

Step five:

Ask the Spirit to show you a visual of “ insert theme ”

Write down any and everything that you see, hear, feel, think, or sense as and with the knowing it's from them.

Due date: Bedtime... To be reviewed in the pm or tomorrow morning.

Next assignment will be up to you!

*******************

"Practice assignment Theme"

This assignment is to visualize that scene. You are there. Erik is doing something. Using the directions, connect with Erik and your loved ones their. Describe how you see the scene. Additionally describe what Erik is doing, ask him or your loved ones to give you a visual, words, thought, sound, impression or feeling. Describe it. Describe as much detail as interests you. Stop when ir bored, tired, or it fades. Feel free to pass on messages. Tell us what you are doing at the fire. What you wanna say. What spirit says, what your guided to say.

The sea is calling, the fire is burning, live free, just be.

Due date is wed 7 am, the 24th central time.

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Participant #1 (Nikki) channeled response:

NOT what I expected but amazing and OMG I still fee the love.

The scene is a bonfire on the beach, it is dark except for the light the fire provides. There are many individuals around but to me it seems intimate in that we are all one yet talking and visiting in little circles. No one feels excluded and all are familiar, it has the feel of a small get together but in fact is much larger. I am near Eric and my dad, close by are Nonnie, Cyn, M and from there it expands. Many people, many connections. The love is overwhelming. There is very little said in that everything else seems insignificant. Smiles and laughter and a knowing that nothing else matters. It is so odd, because even sitting here I want to ask questions but I get this loving feeling, this contentment that there is no need. The answers do not matter, the questions are no longer necessary. It is the sharing of the emotion. The love, the bond we all have that produces the joy. Eric and my dad both have huge smiles on their face, I too am happy, it is a celebration of a job well done, a circle that is complete and sense of coming home. Beautiful colors reflect in the fire, the water is visible under stars. It is perfection in every sense.

Her spirit teams says:

"The circle of the eternal bonfire. The symbolism and reality of oneness is no coincidence. You can return to the eternal bonfire any time you please. It is where we gather, exchange stories and celebrate our love. Much like a continuous opportunity to be with those from all of our lives. The crowd changes, the songs play and the laughter continues. It is an ever changing mix but one in which we feel grounded. The light from the fire is eternal as is the love we share from life time to life time. The ring of fire is the the light of our souls, never ending. we are always here for you, shining our light, sharing our love."

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Participant #2 (Jason) channeled response:

I see sand dunes undulating down hills covered scattered plants, rocky cliffs, tidal pools, and rocks, reaching down to a broad sloping beach. The tide is out and the waves are crashing, surf against land, a gentle dull growling roar against sea gulls, tangy salt air dampens my face. I am walking down a white sand beach, gritting sand between my toes and grinding my heel in. As I approach the shoreline, dusk wraps me in a cool blanket, back-lit by the orange glow of the sunset. The last rays licking the sky with purple, red, yellow-blue paint. Ahead I hear rock music and a crowd of people. Looking ahead I see several groups of people and animals. One group of people is milling about a large bonfire. Drift wood sticks out from it like some kind of crazy tepee and people are sitting in lawn chairs, on logs, and on blankets on the sand. Some are arm in arm, some holding hands and lap to lap. Others are standing around the fire tossing paper into it. Some are poking at it with sticks. Many are just standing around having a beer while staring into the flames as if lost far far away. But there is this deep sense of belonging that clings everywhere in the night air. I look to the side, to the music and see Erik M. in the middle of a conga line, "with a bunch of hotties", dancing and wooping it up through tiki torches, everyone going under a low pole while trying no to spill their drinks, laughing all the while. He is wearing a lei, grass skirt and a coconut bra!! IN my head he asks us if he has to wear anything under the skirt...... my friend laughs and says,... 'balls to the breeze my friend'.. everyone laughs and screams with contagious amusement. Other groups are playing Frisbee with the dogs or playing in the sand. I can see Eric A. and Earl, and the rest just hanging out by the fire, enjoying each others company. Eric A. is sitting in the sand, knees up, arms around his knees, hands clasped, just smiling. Earl is regaling a couple women with tales of life, waiting for that perfect moment to slip in the sly punch line with a knowing grin and a tipped beer.

I put my hands in my pockets, still a ways away, and take the vision in. Still standing in the dark, and knew I belonged nowhere, yet everywhere. I was here, and it was enough. I was thinking about this last life, and knew that what I thought was me wandering through long shadowed days and haunted endless nights, was nothing more than a brief conversation with these loved ones here tonight. Those dreams became conversations of distant vision with those

people before me now . We laughed, cried, and I fell in love with myself again dancing under heavens stars. No longer on the road to remembering, I could feel I was ready to make new memories to carry me forward.

I used to pray I'd figure out how to belong. And I did, across the universe, they waited for me in this place I never left. Their arms.

Erik says, "There is a fire for every experience, a flame for every life. Youre tossin photos of life into the fire and watching them curl up and drift as ash into the night sky. Don't worry too much. Like a camera, you take images of what you focus on, but it's not really who you are, it's just a snapshot of what your focusing on. That scene is set up or taken on a moments inspiration. Print out that image and look at it from different points of view and then put it down, pick up your camera again and go explore what your view means to you. There is always new things to see, and new ways of seeing it. Your vision is always your own, but it's something you share, that has meaning to everyone who looks at it. Treasure it, feel it, love it or hate, but put it down and join the party." Now he is making a group of people get together and forming a human pyramid for a photo moment. Everyone falls and becomes a tangle of laughing arms and legs. He takes a photo of that. Looks back at me, and smiles and says, "see... that's life."

Earl gives a knowing grin and nod and says, "You don't need to wait for the here-after to light the fires of life, take a picture, conga, or put your arm around those you love. Don't walk into the sunsets of life without sharing a moment."

***

These two are for Erik... ha ha

***

Barring Spirit intervention, I don't know that I will be blogging too much over the next week.

I have a pile of work related busy work to dig out of. Have a good week everyone!

--Jason

October 24, 2012

Misc. Q & A and comments from the CE blog:

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http://www.channelingerik.com/earth-or-heaven-hmm/#comments

Interesting.... based on the channelings provided from Erik, Jason, the Committee, others... the consensus is that we chose our life plan and our experiences.

With that said, why couldn't Erik simply make something like that a qualifier for coming back again? Make the choice to NOT challenge oneself with the experience of those issues?

You are quite correct and make a very valid point. All of us are allowed to pick and choose the types of life we wish depending on our overall soul experience and understanding. It's very common to take a "vacation" life as it were after an especially hard life. There is no judgement to desire, plan and create an easy life. One can read really good examples of that across the literature out there. Some souls like to plan very slow even, balanced lives, and just have hundreds of them. Some like super intense rough, cram everything under sun into a life plan.....Everyone has the chance to play any and every role depending on interest, awareness, and understanding of experience. Although it's important to think of the multidimensional nature of the of soul and how something like that would progress in a simultaneous progression of space time. That's what guides are for. Guides and soul group associations help us plan all that. Our present facets or personalities pretty much don't have to worry about it. For example, a last life of a suicide murderer is not going to turn around and be a deity participating in solar system management. The soul will be uncontrollably drawn to deal with all of that dense tight energy, balancing it out, releasing it, and transforming the effects across lifetimes, and in others lives, it's causes created. To our present facets, the concept of 'challenge' really isn't knowable until we cross over because we are not taking into consideration past and future life experiences and energies, never mind parallel lives, and probable experience. So I guess what I am trying to say is that it's always totally OK to take it easy and want peace. The personality you are now, will always have free will and choice. There is no issue with it wanting a rest, break or chill out. The other parts of you and your peeps wont mind. you know,.... me, myself, and I... ha ha.... The wee's of I. (wink). Our souls are far more robust, complex, vast, and yet far more simple than anything we can currently imagine. All the more reason not to worry and only focus on what feels like comfort and love. The rest will fall into place by the energy of our focus.

***

http://www.channelingerik.com/earth-or-heaven-hmm/#comments

I am wrestling with creation and density and there is no here one to ask about it. I understand that the creation is a reflection of the dimension that it is created in, that's fine. So it is possible for you to create an experience that allows you to interact with Erik in his realm, face to face. That is completely available. What I don't understand - and maybe this is too much of a rational mind question - is how we can see better hear feel and touch our creations. Erik says that "he goes right through" dense matter, which makes sense given the frequency level he plays in. But does it work the other way around? Can we create "dense" experiences over there? Sure we can create any kind of food, house, material thing NOW, but the manifestation takes longer. What about fourth dimension creations? Oh my gosh does this make any sense?

I can give you my 2 cents. To interact physically is a subjective experience depending on context, and view. Emotional and thought energy has sort of fuzzy magnetic qualities. It can attract, repulse, organize, transform, transmute, reflect and what have you. It is powered or emanates from the consciousness energy shared by all that is. And amplified and recreated by self creating, self aware replications. Our souls. Our souls can transmit this energy on a singular level, group level, and both levels projecting through multiple dimensions is an inherent simultaneous function. The process of this project can occur at any state of consciousness but new dimensional interactions are created by focused energy. The degree, stability, and unfiltered nature of that focus controls the rate and strength of how these consciousnesses attract, repulse, or transform multi dimensional energy which is then correlates to matter of that particular dimensions it passes through. This is what some see as vibration. Sub atomic movement. These fuzzy self aware energies have the ability depending on focus, experience and thus awareness; to draw matter together from whatever dimension they exist in. Together with other conscious energies they can pool their resources and create more and more physical systems. Atoms, to elements, to molecules, to proteins, to cells, to flesh, or other forms in a natural environment.

So this is a very gross generalization of how spirit creates and interacts with physical experience. Physicality can be created on many dimensional levels depending on the co-created rules of natural laws of that dimension. If you as a soul or spirit have experience in that dimension, or are of it, you can also participate physically there. Otherwise you are limited to participate energetically, unless, you have a host or have other conscious energy create one for you.

So if you no longer exist in a dimension because you have increased or altered your energy output for whatever reason, you can no longer manifest physically in that dimension, unless you gather the extra energy, experience, awareness, and knowledge of the laws that created it. Meaning, you no longer have a host, a co created form, a transport, or the power to manipulate matter there. You need to find others with the power, get shared power, or increase your own power and experience to create on that level as a creator in your own right.

So, now back to consciousness operating in different dimensions. If a consciousness using a host form in a dense dimension wants to project part of itself into a higher dimension it can do so provided it is taken by someone from that dimension or it is originally of that dimension. Once there, it can create energetic forms, and creations, but not interact physically there yet. The reason it takes so long for us to create physicality here in this dimension is because we are not of this dimension. We are using hosts, or physical vessels that were created or co-created for us, It's sort of a weird symbiosis. Body does not correlate to the soul. Consciousness, personality, memory, emotion, thought and experience do though. To create physicality here, we have to basically enmesh our energy into pre or co-created physical forms, learn to use them, over come the foreignness of it, and then channel our energies through all sorts of filters and operate it all in the pre agreed upon laws of it's nature. Meaning you can say I want cake without physically using the physical ingredients and doing the actions physically. But once you remove yourself from that phsycial restraint, you only operate energetically and you can create cake all you want.

Labeling dimensions by number is sort of erroneous, as that's just a human like tool to make sense of it all. A better analogy would be to think computer systems, or webs. The more energy, experience, and awareness you have the more subsystems you can operate or the bigger your interconnected web.

Erik and others can manipulate physicality in this dimension because they are pooling their energy, resources and experience but when it's just him, he's not creating matter, he's manipulating our energy to give the illusion of physicality. To actually do aports, move matter, interrupt space time, usually takes group action...

Here is some follow up:

Q-1) What I am getting from my guides (erik et.al) is that our unique potential as creators of physical and energetic manifestations are inherent with all those who incarnate within this system of reality (this part of the universe). What that means, aka "system" I am uncertain, but it's a word I hear over and over again. System of reality. What I get is that there are other systems both in this universe and beyond(?), where this differs(though I don't know how, if this is linear location or dimensional, I don't know). Potential is not limited to just physical or energetic, but in various combinations as well. ie. see thought forms that interact with various stages of consciousness and physical reality.

Q-1 pt2) Based on what I am getting from my guides you are correct. Potential is more directly related to understanding experience as opposed to creating experience to understand. This is why you wouldn't have a highly experienced Spiritual Master incarnating per say as opposed to them working at creating systems for others to create experiences in. Now that doesn't mean they wont guide and help us. It just means their potential and view is so far removed from our perspective, I am not even sure it's especially understandable while we are in these bodies. It's not that we cant or wont, it's that our temp physical filters are blocking the view.

2) In general, it totally depends on context, and point of view, and the view of the observer. For example. While in the body one must work within the filter of the agreed upon physical system of reality, dimension, world, what have you. If you want to focus on health. That's great, but your consciousness and body is never an island unto itself, You are also participating in a gestalt of your soul aspects across dimensions, as well as participating in group experiences. So the degree to which you can effect changes in your health will depend on your view, perspective, belief, modality, and action taken to that end, within the context of the group interactions. So while you may learn energy healing, physical healing and various therapies, both physical, holistic, mental, what have you....You will still have the cause and effect of not only a pre life plan that incorporates singular and group actions, but past, future and side view lives/aspects/facets of your soul... all creating effects of various causes. Ok. that's a big jumble of words I know... But What I mean to say is that any life experience is a result of a gestalt of cause and effects. At the incarnational level the experience is not so much about creation or manifestation as it is about understanding the self within the experience within various contexts or points of view. Everything else at this level for most situations seems secondary to that end. From what I gather the number one way to increase focus for creation is to know thyself. The more you understand, the more in line with your highest possible self you will be, which will manifest your greatest potential. That's why so many guides like Erik talk so much about asking questions of emotional experience to remember. The techniques to do this are our free will choices. There are many that are all equally valid. One of the basic ones is to look at how the heart feels and try to balance how we feel about ourselves within each experience. Letting go of what feels like us, and embracing what doesn't. To be or not to be.

****

http://www.channelingerik.com/earth-or-heaven-hmm/#comments

Coming to Earth means forgetting who you Are, so it is kind of a risk. One could also see it as a glorious challenge. In any event, viewing Earth as "better" or "preferable" to something else reflects a kind of dualism that I thought was absent in the relm where Erik is...

The way I have always seen it, especially based on my Erik interactions is that better or preferable is like asking a mountain climber which is better, the view or the climb? When you see a challenge that is totally up to you and your ability, knowledge, experience, perspective, and joy, how do you decide how to go about the climb? Do you plan it, learn, get help, or do you go hog wild and just race out into nature that's already there? Once your in that zone, you forget the world, who you are, and commune with something that's greater than you, and yet seems separate from you. In that zone, everything else you thought you were and know fades away and the experience becomes something else. It's not really about dualism, it's about the filtered experience focusing perception of the self.

***

http://www.channelingerik.com/petty-emotions/#comments

This makes me smile, and not just because he's pranking someone besides myself. I remember the first time anyone ever told me, that I wasn't responsible for others reactions or opinions. (that was you elisa!).. ha ha... Ever since then, Erik seems to practically chant it to me like he's got a war drum or something. 'none of your business, mind your business, not your problem, so don't be an ass or (insert profanity)... ha ha.... by the way, I did another channeling practice session yesterday that totally was synchronous with yesterdays post. The theme of the channeling session was about a conversation you (Elisa and I had several years ago)

3 years ago, I told Elisa; If someone had told me that this life would be about learning to love myself through fear, i would have told them they were fucking crazy. Since then, experience after experience along with the good friends Ive met online, Spirit through souls like Erik, Drew, and Eric have show us how love is all that matters. And even though at times its made me feel fucking crazy, they helped me live free. I told Elisa...."I never thought it would be so hard. You know, when this life is over, we are gonna have a beach party. A bonfire next to the ocean. You, me, all the moms, all our loved ones, the boys.....and were going to feed that fire with photos of our fears, pain, grief. And well dance around it and party." Since then, Ive said stuff like that to all those Ive grown to love. And Erik, and the gang have shown it to others in their own way. Through photos, through visions and through the love they constantly reminds us that we are all in this together. Its even been suggested that this wasn't wishful thinking but a real event that is going to happen, or has happened in the great circle. This channeling practice assignment I made was to visualize that scene. You are there. Erik is doing something. Using the directions on my blog, connect with Erik and your loved ones. For my own part in that vision/channeling session, I described what I saw, posted some photos that resembled the event. Other guides and a friend took part as well, and Erik had this to say about it. Erik said (talking about a beach bonfire I described in a vision), "There is a fire for every experience, a flame for every life. Youre tossin photos of life into the fire and watching them curl up and drift as ash into the night sky. Don't worry too much. Like a camera, you take images of what you focus on, but it's not really who you are, it's just a snapshot of what your focusing on. That scene is set up or taken on a moments inspiration. Print out that image and look at it from different points of view and then put it down, pick up your camera again and go explore what your view means to you. There is always new things to see, and new ways of seeing it. Your vision is always your own, but it's something you share, that has meaning to everyone who looks at it. Treasure it, feel it, love it or hate, but put it down and join the party." Then he showed me in vision a group of people getting together and forming a human pyramid for a photo moment. Everyone falls and becomes a tangle of laughing arms and legs. He takes a photo of that. Looks back at me, and smiles and says, "see... that's life."

***

http://www.channelingerik.com/petty-emotions/#comments

Q & A to not understanding what Erik said:

Erik said, "Hell, yes. You can get that down, when you go to have compassion for

someone and they’re a total dick, you can do it, because you realize

they’re acting their own shit out. It’s really not about you. EGO!

That’s why that whole shit came up with ego so much. Kinda weird."

What he's saying is this. If you don't own anothers reaction, belief, feelings, or perspective, you don't need to own it, judge it, or try and make it your own. Just as your reactions are born from your experiences, so are theirs. That said, each persons experience is unique and a valid expression of how they explore their life. When we realize that we literally can't as souls own anothers outlook, we see that the ego or individualistic attempts by the ego to control and own others reactions are pointless, we can let them go as not being about us. Once we understand that this all is really about understanding the process of remembering who we really are as souls, we can have compassion for others in their journey to pass through and experience the same. Thus their problem is not about us at all. It's about them. It's ok to let go of both ego's. :)

***

http://www.channelingerik.com/petty-emotions/#comments

I really like the idea of learning to calm mental frizziness in elementary school! Very much appreciate more info. on mental discipline though, that skill was emphasized by Buddha as very very important. And yes Erik it does make a lot of sense to not overanalyze every life occurrence! :) The part where it gets confusing though is that when we're trying to build our ability to connect to spirit we are told to, if we feel that something is a message for us, to not question or doubt that and take it and believe it. Because more than anything we need to build confidence and decrease fear, as i understand it. I guess the crux is that " Intuition is always going to come in ways that are progressing you to learn."

I can tell you one thing Erik has always told me that helps a lot in my own life. He said, "If your going to sit on the potty with your shit, there is nothing wrong with it. Just don't forget to flush." Aside from that, as far as it comes to spirit messages; What I've always taken to heart is this...When any spirit, message or teacher passes something along, it's not that one needs to believe it or question, or doubt it; Or even judge, evaluate or label it.....it's simply that one can allow ones' self to stand next to that message and see how it feels or resonates with one's heart. If it feels like you... Awesome! Make it your own without guilt or judgement. It's you. Own it. On the other hand, as you stand next to the message, if it doesn't feel like what's in your heart. ... just let it go. Walk away. It wasn't for you, nor is it who you are now.... and that's ok. Cause who you are on the inside will always be more than anyone else's message, spirit or otherwise... cause your awesome... Just be it!

October 22, 2012

Happy Monday? ha ha.... Hope all is well. Not too eventful of a weekend. I was somewhat Ill Fri/Sat, which is just as well as the weather was full of cold drizzle and fog. I spent part of Sunday doing yard work. I don't have much to report on spirit front. I took a couple days off from anything related. Although I did have one very odd lucid dream. In the dream, A good chuck of the United States had to evacuate due to 3 nuclear power plants exploding. The weird thing about the dream was that it seemed to be more about me and whom ever was with me trying to escape, find shelter, and escape the mass exodus of people. There were dream scenes of us stealing cars and trying to drive them on old damaged freeways, railroads, overpasses. Seeking shelter in concrete grain silos and running through malls to find food. I am sure it was more of a standard "chase" type dream. In it, my teeth and hair also started falling out.... so gross.

***

I think its an interesting feeling. That sense i sometimes get after asking a lot of questions, hearing a lot of answers and feeling like i get it...but then i have the overwhelming sensation that i don't care cause all I am interested in is a hug.......Do u ever feel like that.....? Chocolate, hugs, puppies, naps, early sun rise, mocha's, grandmas cooking, family....It's kinda cool. What we love helps keep perspective on what really matters....

***

Many times I would seem to get upset with other peoples expectations as they approached my intent, neither of us knowing of the other's. Nothing spoken, nothing but mismatched desires causing resistance within each place of self. In those moments, I would find my feeling bent out of shape. My desire for friendship and sharing was left unfulfilled because I didn't put my intent, boundary, or position myself in a way that the others could understand. It was then that one of my friends reminded me, She said, 'other peoples reactions are non of my business. It's not even about setting up my boundaries, but coming back into each moment and reaffirming them with the proper intent. That's true for anything in life. Life is not a one time even that purpose sets the course and guarantees a destination. It's a series of moments where the self has a choice to be new and free. It's a great chain of choices that if you don't answer the question of who you are, your emotional energy will do it for you. So it's always better to come into each new moment with a conscious awareness to look at your intent and ask, "who am I now".

***

Last night I had another interesting experience with "objective voice clairaudience". As opposed to subjective voice which is mind speech, objective voice seems to be a 3d projection and audible originating from within physical space to whomever is experiencing it. Although it can not be classified as a materialization unless multiple people observe it or it is recorded on electronics. Even so, typically these events are often subject to individuals that have other mediumistic experiences. It is a function of spirit interaction within the aura. Many times the spirit creating a bridge between their thought energy and our senses by going through the aura. This often creates a tin-like, tubular or hollow effect to the voice. Normally less than 3 words are uttered due to energy availability of the spirit. It is rare to have more than that. If more does occur it is almost always because multiple spirits are facilitating the energy required to manifest it. As such, the words and sounds can seem or be garbled. Last night Cyn stopped by with Eric. In the middle of the night I woke up all of a sudden. And then on my left side next to the bed I hear her loudly announce herself and then when I acknowledged her, she said an emphatic "Hiiiiiiii!"... I am assuming I must have been off traveling with them in my sleep or they were busy making rounds to various people. What was interesting about this was she sounds neither especially male or female, but young like a child. It made me smile. I've often wondered why Spirits don't do manifestations more often. I know from talking to guides that contact like that is most often given when comfort and reassurance is needed, or for spiritual reasons of progression. It depends on ones life plan as to what a Guardian Angel allows or doesn't allow. Many times it is simply a matter of spirit experience and energy availability. It's rarely just one thing and always pretty specific to the incarnate individual.

***

I am currently working on another channeling practice session. I'll let you know in a few days how it went.

***

I was reading some of the recent posts on CE. And In it people were talking about booze, pot, and other drugs while doing spiritual junk. Personally, I always tell my students that booze and channeling don't mix. In my personal experience it can do very odd and strange things to clairvoyant vision. Some of which can range from super annoying stuff where your emotional state creates thought forms which because your drunk you can't control... to scary stuff like attracting entities that want to know what's going on. That's not to say it's going to happen all the time. For a large part it totally depends on your life plan and how your guides and GA implement it and the old free will thing. Now as far as drugs go. I would never recommend them. Not because I disagree with Erik et al.. but because my birth brother was a severe addict and things like pot and lsd radically changed his personality and greatly aggravated his mental illness. One of my spirit teachers has suggested that if chemicals are used to facilitate spiritual travel and experiences that it be done one on one with an expert who can guide, control, direct, and be there for any problems. Apparently in other realities, realms, planetary systems, and dimensions,... chemicals and medicine are used like we use trance states to achieve spiritual experiences, as well as extra solar system travel. So instead of building a space ship, you'd use medicine to project your consciousness in travel. As far as us on this planet at this point in history, in a doctors office.... ? no, I wouldn't recommend it, unless the doctor in charge did it one on one with you and was an experienced psychic medium and or shaman in their own rite. I say that because if you get into a situation you need someone who can help you and do the follow up required. I don't think its something that someone should seek out for a one time long distance group retreat per say... But then again, that's just my opinion.

***

For those who question others experience and understanding:

Always take to heart, what resonates with your heart. Life isn't to get answers, or even to seek them. Life is about understanding your experience as you ask questions about yourself. Higher Spirit will never tell someone on earth what to think or feel. There is something for every view, perspective and with that perception comes unique understandings that are never as important as how you see yourself with such information. For some divination, future events, hidden and esoteric knowledge and possible realities define their probable experience. For others it is the simple emotions within each moment that matter. It all depends on what questions you are asking about yourself as you life this life. Do you know what I mean? Always look inside yourself and see how it feels to you and how you see your ultimate reality. You won't go wrong...

October 19, 2012

Channeling practice with Friends:

(AKA: spooky Pictionary and some woowoo junk)

Cont...

[.......2 entries See below!]

Intro:

Instructions:

Today's theme is " insert theme "

Step one:

Step two:

Visualize an empty space in your head. Describe it in writing

Step three:

Visualize Spirit of your choice in the space by their self. Describe it.

Step four:

Step five:

Ask the Spirit to show you a visual of “ insert theme ”

Write down any and everything that you see, hear, feel, think, or sense as and with the knowing it's from them.

Due date: Bedtime... To be reviewed in the pm or tomorrow morning.

Next assignment will be up to you!

**********************************************************

SESSION #1 With Erik M.

Session #1 With Erik (Jason and a CE buddy hook up with Erik m.)

October 18-19, 2012

Theme: ("What 80s cartoon character am I?")

**OK Erik! Tell or show us what 80's cartoon character you are!! **

Jason here.-- My good friend got a hold of Erik and had the following to say about her experience:

"(laughing) He picked Superman first but I was like, "I don't think superman was an 80s cartoon character..." and so then he went with Ninja Turtles, which is still questionable but since I remember playing ninja turtles on the playground in kindergarten (89 - 90) I suppose I'll give it to him."

***

Jason's reply. --

Well first it was gi joe, but then he changed it as we goofed off with each other. Usually our interactions devolve as if we were both 5 year olds or something. You know, rocks, sling shots, water fights, mental feats of one-up-manship. He always wins, unless he lets me....sigh.. In any case, He at first said,

"GI Joe. I am the all American Joe...." --And showed me images of him in green fatigues and parachute pants, boots, parachute back pack, guns, a beret. But I told him that was so boring. -- Then in my minds eye he kinda melted or faded away and morphed into The Increadable Hulk. You know ripping bursting clothes all green and muscles. And he leaped up in my minds eye face and yelled, "Hulk! Hulk smash! RAWWHHRRRHH!!..."

I looked at him, made a face and said,

"Don't you think that's kind of obnoxious and violent?"

And he replied by showing me, "Hulk jumped up in my face again and stuck out a big slobbering tounge and licked my face chin to forehead trailing spit!" and then he jumped back laughing like a crazy man!

At which point I just looked at him incredulously and watched as his "hulkness" transformed into a Halloween costume and he pulled the mask off an asked me, what I was going as for Halloween. He showed me a visual of him and me as little kids. And thinking of that mindset, my inner kid said I dunno... maybe darth vader or a creepy witch... and he smiled wryly and said, "you mean Bitch?".... sigh.....Halloween dress up jokes.

I then said... OK... Erik... Any messages?

To which he replied with... "HULK SPIT!.... grreeeeennnnn looogiessss...raaahhhhh!"

Visual of screaming running kids w jason. He then said,

"U know, hulks finger would never fit in his nose so no hulk boogers. Be grateful.." ..(grin, while cocking his head, arching his brow, and rubbing his hands together.)

***

My Buddy's Reply:

See, I was looking for a classic like GI Joe - that's totally 80s. Incredible Hulk? Lou Ferrigno has been busting out of his shirt since 1978! That is SO pre-80s... I mean I get it, he was a 90s kid. He probably grew up on Nickelodeon and ehy, that's cool, but come on. You're in the spirit world with infinite perspective and no time.... you could come up with SOMETHING. lol 80's purist. lol

***

Jason's reply:

Well... technically your visuals were also 80's... I clearly remember watching superfriends with superman in several different variations in the 80's.

Thanks for the practice session!! It was a ton of fun!... Until next time!!

**********************************************************

SESSION #2 Nikki, Jason and Spirit family.

Session #2 With Nonnie and Cyn (Nikki and Jason's family members and spirit gang -- Nikki and I share some guides & family - Nonnie is grandma, and Cyn is a GA -- fyi).

October 18-19, 2012

Theme:

("Show images, pictures, visuals, symbols and or give advice on loving others and allowing them free will/freedom. This can apply to parent child, parent/pet, spouse, often we claim to love and then in retrospect it seems controlling.")

Nikki's experience:

I see Nonnie with her hair elegantly piled on her head and in a simple dress or jumper with a black turtle neck type shirt. Stunning.

Cyn is tall and thin, late teens early 20's pretty, porcelain like but not dainty. Bangs, beautiful complexion, pretty eyes. Dressed in a flowy dress or tunic above her knees. I cant really describe where they are, it is almost fog like, misty, swirling with pastel color.

(such amazing movement in front of me, gentle, soft, calm. Im sure they are in my office but in my mind we are elsewhere)

Nikki:

"Hi, lets do this right ladies."

Nonnie laughs hard, she is very animated and excited. Cyn is in the background a bit, smiling and pleasant.

Nikki:

"What advice can you give us about loving others and and allowing them free will/freedom. This can apply to parent child, parent/pet, spouse, often we claim to love and then in retrospect it seems controlling.

Nonnie:

"Oh sweetie, that is something I dealt with in this past life. (OMG my heart swells, I want to cry, it is so true, like I forgot and am being reminded)

I was very much in control of Charlie (she called him Daddy* I called him Bompoo). HE was such a passive, loving man and I very much ran his life. I know I did it with love and pride and a bit too much worry about others judgment. Picking out his clothes, worrying about what functions we attended. His being silly with your girls, would others judge him? I also was that way with my two daughters and somewhat with the 5 granddaughters. It was you Nikki that I did not try to control, you were too independent, much like your father. In controlling others, making suggestions, worrying about social faux pas we are exposing our lack of self esteem and our lack of trust. when we worry of judgment it is a result of not remembering who we are or our divine connection. In not allowing others to truly be who they are we lose the opportunity to see the love, the joy and gifts they bring. Society has a lot to do with this. That exception that there is a right a "perfect". What is perfect is the love of someone no matter what they choose. Daddy often wanted you girls to put on shows for our guests. At times I allowed it, but at other times I thought, why cant he be more adult. But his love was in entertaining. His wit, his humor, previous lives of circus stunts and comedy. We can try to control, we even convince someone that we are right. But we then lose the ability to feel the joy that person would provide"

"Protection is one thing, desire is another. We should always protect others, a dangerous situation, a lack of knowledge on their part. But this would pertain to little children and pets. Most adults are capable of making their own choices. What we deem as improper is only a reflection of our worry or lack of trust. Because if we truly trust that our soul has a plan and that love is always the answer. Than we should trust that we planned to experience all that those around us have to offer. As you know, Daddy eventually could not make any decisions. Alzheimer's took over. IT was yet another opportunity for me to let go. It finally took a disease for me to realize I never had control of the man. His heart was going to love what it loved."

Cyn:

That was beautiful . I will only add that what you experience and what you focus on IS the lesson, the plan. It will come up over and over again. Just like with Rose and her opportunities to control. Nikki, you have the same. you have young adults that are truly capable of making decisions. You offer advice and often it is taken, but at times when your advice is not the choice you feel disrespected. a soul can only grow if it is left to make its own choices. As opposed to looking at the choice made, look at the outcome and focus on that. Did the choice lead to joy? Each soul should take a look at the choices made around them. We can and do learn from others. Some souls will reminds us that we are not to be on their path. Others will draw us in and remind us of Joy and love. A soul should make its own choices to experience. Even choices of perceived failure are better than choices from another.

*I never thought about Nonnie calling Bompoo Daddy. My mom and her sister called him that forever. There is a previous life connection to that nickname I am sure of it.

***

Jason's Experience:

Jason:

Well, It was... oh, I guess around 8:30 ish at night. I was sitting on the couch when I started noticing spirit movement in the living room. I pretty much ignored it because I was watching Netflicks on the tv. When I felt 2 distinct energies plop down next to or on me. And I pretty much ignored them. Knowing I wasn't getting away with waiting until the morning, I planned on talking to them at 9:30 / 10 or so on my way to bed. So I finished my show, and trotted off downstairs to bed. I knew I should take this session a bit more serious as I could tell from the energy that they had something to say. So I was a bit more formal. You know the stuff I do and say, I've posted it online before. Well, I did that, and waited. Well, I didn't have to wait, because Nonnie was right there already. She'd been there the whole time. I'm pretending she was there to watch tv with me.. ha ha...But I know that's not true because the entire time I was watching tv, her and Cyn were feeding me info and having me text it to myself.. believe you me, when spirit wants something you can't but help to work on it... it's like an uncontrollable twitch or urge.... I have to do it.... ha ha...so as I type this up, I am piecing together a whole bunch of text files I made.....lol

Which is funny because as I sat there, trying to watch tv, it felt like my head was being riffled through and I was thinking of a previous interaction with some people I knew who were having a hard time with life, but at times, their experiences made me uncomfortable because nothing I did seemed to help them. So in reply, on the couch, they both told me,

"Brave, honest, unselfish. The courage, to be honest about ones inner truth, when faced with the opportunity for unselfish service, is among the bravest things ever faced in life."

I said in reply, It often seems to be something I struggle with. Sometimes when faced with challenges in life, fear and insecurity, and others opinions, It all grips me so bad I'd do almost anything to escape, hide, and avoid life, myself, and those life changes. Some times all I can do is turn around stock still and stare, loathing my fear......the only thing that gets me through it is convincing myself I dont wanna be that way, that its not me. Some times I get around to accepting it, sometimes I believe it, and some times I can act on it. Its in those times, I get it. I know who I am....I am here to try and understand that....its not easy, so I keep trying".

They replied to me:

"Sometimes the greatest service really is like you've heard. To simply love simply. So that others may experience this in their own way, their own terms, in their own time. Even should you only hold them in your heart, the energy of that movement, that action creates light that encompasses your world and heals that which your eyes can not see. But should you look honestly at your self you will feel this inside. Nothing said about love is new except by what cast you gaze upon it through your own eyes. Even so, looking into anothers eyes searching for the same, wonders never cease to be born."

So, Like I said, after TV, I went downstairs and laid in bed. Nonnie had more to say, but it was more of a 3d and minds eye thing....

As I lay there, I had a very localized Warm warm face...like in front of a fireplace...But it was just in this circle like a cone, or bowl over my face.....she feels similar to your Eric in a certain way...energy wise.........I can also see what she is wearing, but not her facial features. She is wearing this moss greenish grey skirt suit. Kinda classy Jackie-O in style. Very Vogue.. if you know what I mean. Trim, cut very couture. And a dainty wide brimmed hat tipped to the side. I wanna say dark hair, curled up. And boy oh boy is she a flirt! wow.. so funny. It's like she's working the run way or something. She's got her arms down, but hands pointed outward, and she's doing this funny little step in line toe to heel long stride dance move down this run way. Kinda like a swishing, undulating glide, real slow and subtle and classy. Almost waltz like. And she's looking out with these peeking eyes like she knows shes gonna trap every man who looks at her. She stops at the end of the plat form runway stage thing and pulls out this long stemmed red rose and hands it to me. And as I reach out open mouthed to take it... It transforms into a sunflower in my hand. It was so much glamor and perfection.

She is really feisty. And talks with quick sure words. I almost wanna say forceful speech. A very happy seriousness. She said,

"You are my father, son, friend, she is my daughter. She has many mothers who love her greatly, and many children, who she will love again and again. You remember great pain because it is what you are healing. She remembers great love because she is growing it. Now you Go on now write that down. (laughter)".

***

All I had to say to that was wow!

I then asked for Cyn, to be connected formally with Cyn.

The skin sensations on my face went from warm to hot like someone threw a hot wet towel over my head and I got dizzy and light headed, and it felt like my skin was marching, as if something under it was undulating. I had another vision. In my vision I saw a cloud of white and yellow mist, glowing like sunlit mist, with the top fluttering like a dragonflies wings, and it unfolded like a flower in bloom, and a long haired blond fair face with freckles, smiled at me, though I could see no features clearly, because the light was too bright.

She hovered over me and wavered to and fro like shimmered heat and paused and said, "You can write this down now." She laughed and said she is always here. And she sort of sounded from time to time as though she spoke with others....She said,

"Don't worry about what you think IS, but just give to in your self and what you feel. Things are never quite what they seem, just trust your heart and have faith in your ability to feel what is right for you. All is for a reason, even if not the reason you think you currently seek. You can not go astray as there is no where to go but back to yourself. Even that, is not as it seems, for you always have been, you will remember yourself at some point and all this will wash away. Don't worry. We hold your loved ones while they can not see. We guide until they can guide themselves. We walk beside, share, and support. Let us take your worry, lets us share our faith with you in you. Look at them as you feel for us and know there there will be no difference. Hold what peace you can, for this is where you are, and from where you can love. Remember. Free will is simply acknowledging that anothers choice is just another aspect of yourself, united with all that is in the same journey. There is no right or wrong, only perspective of view. Should the view bother, don't change your view, change your focus. In a different focus, new love can be seen in new light.

The trick is not in letting go, or a thing that you need to walk away from. The trick is not a trick, but it is to remember simply, the simplicity that is your inner being. Remember that there is nothing to hold on to, nor to let go of. Not because there is nothing there, but because all separation is illusion. You are them and they are you, just as all that is, you are. True walking away is impossible. You can not let go, but that of yourself you are willing to forget or not look at. You can not walk away from something you believe is a certain way, when beyond this illusion you are united in a bond far beyond any singular perception. So while we always say life is about you. It is the paradox you have chosen to enter. This life.

Even though you can recognize your emotions, filter your experience and your perception of spirit. Know that being clear of it is but a fallacy. For this same emotional filter is born of your experience here and elsewhere, this filter is also what you use to focus your view . The view of yourself, your view of others.From this view, you come to some comfort and attempt to find understanding and peace with what you think you are experiencing. But by that, said filtered focus, beyond this shell of flesh, the degree upon which you were able to remember and feel your self, even if unconscious, is the degree your awareness of place, and state will grow beyond this world, and into the next, and the next, and beyond.

These experiences are how you have chosen to experience your creative divine possibilities. Remember the feelings of faith this knowledge engenders in you and you will feel yourself in others and realize that while their journey is indeed theirs, it is also yours, and through your connection, you too are growing from their life. And though you do not own their life, you can see there is really nothing to own, for you all belong to each other through universal love. You can not help but to grow together. So in this light, worry and fear, sadness and grief, can never remain. For your inner light is too bright.

This shift in view will not always ease what pains and feels like suffering. It will not always heal nor make what in your eyes is wrong, right, but it will shift your awareness enough, that what you experience will, through your efforts, and hard work, align more and more, with how you see your ultimate reality.

Fear not, each life sparks but for a moment in the eternal flame of your soul. What you seem to burn through, is placed as it should. Each has value. And just as sparks lead to flame, and flame to ash. The fires of your soul give rise to verdant growth, strong roots, and against golden blue sky's you will bloom. It is so, age after age, eon after eon, universe after universe. You remain, through all that is. Ease your mind, do not worry, and love the best you can. For there is nothing else to do. All else comes circle no matter how wide."

***

At this point as, I emailed Nikki to say I was done and going to sleep and would type up the notes in the morning it was 11:11pm on my phone.

As I lay there I felt a spirit laying next to me, hand wrapped around mine, and arm around my head, I could feel energy on my face, forehead, temple, chin, hand and arm. Then as they were there, suddenly all lifted and they were gone. I felt like barfing. Dizzy. light headed and wobbly. I could tell they all left in mass, I assumed to go see Nikki and see her to bed.....I could still feel their essence in my head like lingering perfume, but it felt at a great distance......I got up to use the bathroom, laid back down and went to sleep. Then around 12:30 I suddenly woke up with a slitting head ache. I had to call out for help with the pain and get me to sleep. . I can't recall anything more. Sleep took me.

I woke up alone or so I thought. But in the shower someone was feeding me the following thoughts:

"Must change the view of self, perspective, belief, point of focus, and then turn inward and the look back up outward and outward and then back as wide as you can, opening yourself to feel all that you are, even in your loved ones and all that you can see in All that is.

This new view then becomes your identification through which you see yourself. In this view expectation can not exist, not because they have no value but because you do. And because you can not be less than, there is nothing to expect, except that which the other person is able and or willing to give. If that should be nothing, its not that they have nothing but that their own filters prevents them from seeing their present truth. They see their view as ultimate reality, while what you see around you is ultimate illusion.

The only reality you know is this new inner understanding. You are love, you are them and they are you. Where they are at, is where they need to be and says nothing about your experience, except that which you are both willing or able to give and share. Some may say, 'but they only take and hurt.' Then you say, it is because in this moment you are choosing to allow it. In this moment, that new identification, is not yet how you really see yourself. And that is OK too. To remove yourself from this moment, one simply needs to take one step of action outside of the moment, as you hold your intention of love. If your heart guides you to step closer to their view, step closer to them. If the heart guides you to comfort in your view, stay steadfast and their view will be repulsed from yours. If you feel guided to step away, take comfort that your soul growth is in that direction and you still hold what love you can. In the end, though it may be painful now, it will be enough."

Later on the bus, I got a text message from Nikki:

"We all went to bed around 11:30 ish. I woke to a chirping alarm noise. It as the smoke alarms. Seems we had no power and they chirp to let you know. pretty cool. It was 12:30. I was so confused as to why we had no power it wasn't storming etc. So i was walking around upstairs with my phone makin sure everything was ok. Of course mike and kurt were out and had no clue. I stood in the hallway and looked in my bedroom and I swear a shadow or just the light from outside looked like an Eric profile standing on the side of the bed, hand beneath his chin, as in a perplexed gesture. I lol. Probably just my imagination but that would be his humor."

***

Rose, The Unfolded Bloom

***

Like the unfolding bouquet, bloom together.

***

Though you seem to sit alone, you are surrounded by love.

***

You all have a very good weekend! --- Fall is almost done here, and I'll be arm deep in raking leaves and getting the yard ready for snow! Luv to all.....

--Jason

October 18, 2012

I had a really really weird evening last night. I was getting home from work kinda late. I live in a busy fast, first ring suburb in a big city. And on the way home I walk from the bus stop. As I was walking home it was kinda getting dark and some really iky skeezy looking guy drives up behind me and asks me if I need a ride home. I thought, what the F**! I turned and looked at him with the most incredulous shocked look.....What is creepy, is that people just do not do that to strangers not in distress! And I know I look rather young at times. I am often mistaken in age by a good 10-20 years. I just turned to the guy and looked at him and said, no! He gave me an embarrassed look and quickly drove away muttering some weird excuse. It was so bizarre and creepy. I've never ever had anything like that happen before. ishy yuk all I could think was he seemed like the serial killer type.. ha ha..sooo weird.

On a more cheery note:

I am not sure I've mentioned it before. I am an amateur gourmet cook, as a hobby. I am also a student of food history. I used to blog about it too. I almost always cook from scratch, I love food. In any case after that run in with the weirdo, I walked in the door told my spouse about it while I started getting dinner ready. I made homemade pasta sauce with everything from the garden. It was so good, I could have just melted, if I do say so myself. So there was that, and I was enjoying some wine, watching a tv show and playing with the dog. A really good evening otherwise.

But then it turned really weird again. As you may know, I am empathic in the extreme. I pick up others emotions and spirit stuff like nobody's business. It is common for me to pick up on spirits I have no clue who they are. I don't talk to them, and usually have my GA ask them to leave. Sometimes I have no clue from where these emotions come. Sometimes it triggers my own emotions from lingering issues. But around 10pm after I went to bed, something just hit me out of the blue. I have no clue from where. I suspect it may have been from someone I know who was in distress, but I am not certain. But I just started receiving all these crazy wild dark thoughts and emotions that definitely did not feel like me at all. Especially since I went to bed in a really good frame of mind. It felt almost like waves and waves of grief and pain crashing against me, in so that my head literally hurt and felt like it was going to implode. I just laid there trying to fall asleep with that until around 12:30 or so. But finally I had wrapped my arms around my head and started pleading to my GA (angel) that I couldn't take it any more and to please cut it off, block it, and take it away. I started to put my arms down, and suddenly I heard thoughts say, "that wont be necessary" And I kept my arms around my head and I felt the top of my head start to get warm to hot. And suddenly all the emotion was gone. And I could breath again. It was so wild. But then I started to ache all over in my joints. And I asked my guides to please help ease my pain so that I could go to sleep. And after a minute or two the top half of my body started to feel like it was floating, you know that feeling after a full day of being on a boat, and you close your eyes and you still feel like your floating. It also almost feels like your on drugs like Oxycontin or something. Its so weird. Like your head is wrapped up in a warm fuzzy blanket. And all the pain went away. Which was interesting. You know, I've had this floating experience quite a bit in relation to spirits. And I am more and more convinced what is going on, that they are just barely easing me out of my body until my spirit disengages from my pain receptors. I am willing to bet this is what happens in anesthesia as well. Like what was that stuff MJ was on? Propofol or something? or any anesthesia. You've heard the stories where people in surgery feel like they are floating off their body... In any case this thing with my guides, eric and erik feels just like that. Like I am slightly floating off my body and wrapped up in a hug or something. Then I went to sleep.

OK. so....... ON yet another note:

Some of my Channeling Erik friends from time to time practice channeling with Erik and our guides. Usually we'll have a topic, theme or symbol and We'll ask those in Spirit to give us minds eye visuals about it. And then we will record the experience and share with each other. Here are two examples from yesterday and this morning. The first one was between Nikki and I and her Dad, who is in Spirit. The second one was what Erik M. sent me on the bus this morning. See below:

***A practice assignment is to connect with Dad about a life theme: Today's theme is "Love vs Fear"

Step one:

Go to a space where you wont be interupted for 5-10 min.

Step two:

visualize an empty space in your head. Describe it in writing

Nikki: A big tree with a white bench beneath it, gravel area underneath, beautiful flowers around the perimeter

Jason: Hard to do sometimes these days. Sometimes there is a lot of freakin people in there.

Step three:

Visualize Dad in it by himself. Describe it and him

Nikki: sitting on the bench in shorts and collared shirt, belt on, glasses on reading a paper or book. Seems to be waiting for me.

Jason: I think I've been messed with. I am only getting a disembodied bald dudes head. Like a floating bobbing head rocking side to side like an snl skit, big ass grin. . freaky

Step four:

Treat that image as Dad and separate from you. Kind of up out and away from you, as if you were viewing either in the room with him, or from a distance. Hold that image in your minds eye and then 'think AT it" as if you were talking to him

Step five:

Ask him to show you a visual of Self Love

Write down any and everything that you see, hear, feel, think, or sense as and with the knowing it's from him.

Nikki: various images of me doing this alone. Walking along the beach thinking at spirits and angels, me running, me dancing, me on my wedding day in my dress. me as a littel girl FULL of love.

Jason : I saw an image of my childhood bedroom in minute detail. It's in the middle of the night, with the moon light creating ambient light. I am sitting up in bed, with the covers over and around me. There is a horrific screeching sound. The closet at the foot of my bed slowly creaks open and it's empty dark, scary, and the only thing in it is on the floor. It's a hampster cadge with a lone wheel in it turning around and around and around, and nothing is in it. ha ha...

Due date: Bedtime... To be reviewed in the pm or tomorrow morning.

Next assignment will be up to you!

*****Next practice exercise*******

Practice assignment is to connect with Erik about a life theme: Today's theme is "Self Love"

So I repeated this assignment with another person from the CE blog, Only this time, the topic was "Self Love". Only this time, we were connecting to Erik M. My co-participant got a lot of visuals of her pets, cats, which was pretty cool. I can totally see how our dogs and cats help us learn about love.

I myself was having a hard time with the excersise, because I was getting a really weird visual from Erik M. They were so odd, I thought it was just me and my weird night messing up my clairvoyant vision. He was being kinda perverse and I didn't know what was going on and if I wanted to blog about it. So I waited until this morning on the bus to hook up with Erik and find out what that was all about.

So I followed the same steps as I mentioned above.

Only this time, I saw Erik m., standing in the dark gray clouds of my minds eye. Then he showed me his hand with a white sock over it. That's all I saw. His hand. - Sock. And he would move it around. And then started clowning around started making dirty gestures with it.

yeah...right..... give me a break Erik!...... I just looked at him and gave him a funny look and said,

"Ummm what the hell are you doing.... you better not be showing me anything gross... are you being perverted?"

And then he started giggling and snickering, and then he started acting as if the sock over the hand was a puppet! A sock puppet! Like kids play with. He was making it have a mouth and making it talk. He laughs at me... and then pulls it off and shows him hugging me, and say's "just kidding".

He then said,

"The sock images and impressions were spot on in both cases. They were analogies for Self love and loving others. Self love without shame, guilt, or worry over what others think " He said, "If you cant give yourself permission to find enjoyment, comfort, pleasure in life, you're gonna have trouble loving others without the same guilt, shame, and worry you attach to yourself. And I don't just mean sexual or physical. It's always wrapped up in the emotional....., physical with emotional....self love, is always wrapped up in multiple things, just like a sock over a hand. On the surface it is one thing, but underneath on multiple levels it can be other things......On the one hand, (he holds up his hand with a sock) ...if you cant love yourself, you think your not worthy of it, you think you don't deserve it, that its wrong, and selfish, a sin,... so your just a puppet, you're coverin yourself up. Hiding behind closed doors, or doing something you think is foolish....And on the other hand.... (he shows me another sock hand)....because your all covered up, your hauling around all this baggage,... you're not lookin at the real you, youre coverin it up, cant see what you have,.... so you cant touch, connect or put yourself out there to share yourself with others. Your putting a barrier between you and them.....more ways than one.....like this hand with a sock over it.... (laughs)....In one hand, (shows me the hand again)....drop the guilt, drop the judgement, drop the lack of worth, and just love yourself. In the other hand, (shows me the hand and makes puppet motions) ...let yourself play, be happy, be silly, and have fun. Enjoy. Then take that sock off and look at your skin. Feel comfortable with it, and know what you do have and that you value it. Then you'll be in a better spot to share it, reach out, and touch someone. love you, love them."

***

On a side note. Nikki had no idea that I was doing a second exercise with Erik. Or that the topic was self love. During her run this morning, She channeled her dad and he said this to her out of the blue. She told me this after I'd talked to Erik ......a co-inky-dink?? hmmm.... :)

From Dad in Spirit: ---- A message on Self love : "Being proud and content with all that you do and knowing you did the very best you could. Laughing at your own mistakes and failures, finding time to do what brings you joy, Remembering you are the perfect you"

***

Happiness finds nothing

in a storied endings.

Happiness ever after

are those that build relationships.

That will never happen

unless you engage others

in happiness.

Live happily ever after,

and you'll fondly remember

once upon a time.

***

With me, with me,

I was born to fall in love with myself.

As I grew I learned

about desire and loathing.

Life rode me,

and I tried to climb down.

Dead only know,

I longed to go.

But I was born to love,

you and me.

I may be crazy,

but I am only so free,

as I can love.

Just me. Just me. Can't you see.

I was born to fall in love,

I was born to grow,

in love, in love,

with just me, just me.

As suns set on time spent,

I grew to see,

and I grew just to be,

as in love with me,

I could ever be.

So you see,

just you and me.

We were born to fall

and learn to love.

Learn to love.

We were born to ride life.

We were born to climb back up.

The Dead only know

how we longed to go.

To live and be free.

To live in love,

free to be.

As the sun rises

all we are,

and will ever be,

Was to live in love.

Just you and me.

October 17, 2012

A old Spirit buddy of mine and Nikki's, This morning had the following to say: (Nikki channeled)--

"You MUST allow yourself to feel and examine every thought. Positive, negative, joyful or fearful. Just because it is there, does not mean you are going to draw it to yourself. It is there for you to address. Feel it, touch it, take a hard look at it. Then decide what you want to do with it. You can make it yours and give it your full attention and create a desire for manifestation. OR you can let it go, release it and refuse to make it yours.

People so often say that we create what we think. That would be funny, right? Instantaneous manifestation. We DO create and manifest our own reality, but it only applies to that in which we attach emotion over and over. Sure fear creates worry and that in turn can create what we DON'T want but a single thought will not draw that worry to you. Your intent, your desires, your emotions are what make it real. Choose LOVE it is easier and the joy will be felt by many." -- From M.--

***

One of life's purposes is not to evaluate and judge, but to ask questions.

Another example of why the only authority people have is that which you give them. Others opinions of you, your potential, your life, your experience, and who you are, is NONE of YOUR business. It is not who you are. You are what you DO. Say, think it, dream it, visualize it, imagine, Be it...... You are perfect in every way.

On Monday, John Gurdon won the Nobel Prize for physiology or medicine.

This is an excerpt from his 1949 high school report card.

http://boingboing.net/2012/10/11/great-moments-in-irony.html

***

My Dog BooBoo is not concerned.

I think I won't worry about today.

October 16, 2012

Without reservation, no excuses, no guilt, no shame, no judgement, live with heart.

***

Some lives need a spiritual focus and physical ground 24/7. It's not anyone's fault if that's not there. It was a soul choice. Very often that choice was made before this life to help others with things like compassion, self love, forgiveness, kindness, service and giving. In some ways very often they are sacrificing themselves to show others how to be a light through opportunities of service and experience. But there is not judgement. Our society is often not set up to take care of these situations and we often encounter these people with feelings of guilt, shame and sadness that we can't or don't know how to help. We shouldn't give into worry or frustration. Just hold in our hearts what we can do, and send light and love to what we can't. Most important, if we have done what we can, and accepted what we cant and expressed our love, most importantly we need to let go of worry and embrace whatever compassion we have for them, AND for ourselves. We will have nothing to give, if we haven't given it to our hearts.

***

Don't you hate it when people aren't willing to embrace their inner unicorn? People need to believe in their inner fabulousness. I say unicorn, cause if they don't like my pretty colors I am gonna gore them with my horn.. haha

***

Perversity is the bedfellow of self judgement. Kick them both out and just enjoy.

***

Guilt usually isn't about the experience but about self judgement based on how others think. Right, wrong or benefit has nothing to do with it.

***

It was a good day,

in my heart

I felt beautiful.

At the end of it,

looking in the mirror

I started to think...

only of you.

***

A lot of spiritual and new age people view the world as love vs fear. Positive or negative. A choice. I've often found it doesn't matter too much as I personally believe physical behavior on a dualistic world is always about a broad range of beliefs and feelings co-mingled with others in a gestalt of views that changes with point of view. I find it better to just accept others differences and move in a way that comforts you, not in reaction to your discomfort with others. Souls know what they are about. They didn't come here with failure as an option. Some of those choices were just very gray. And that's OK.

***

Every now and then I like to throw out some of my really unusual experiences. Some of them are really weird and woowoo subjective visions and dreams. Take this one for example:

A few nights ago, I had set my dream intention to one of a couple of different things.

1) To heal and get better from my cold

2) To have a view that would help me be more comfortable with my guide's role in my life. Something "visual" to bridge the past with present

3) To have vision or dreams of life between lives

I woke to lucid dreaming.

I was a little girl in a white dressing gown in a multistory house I was sitting on a Murphy bed I think. It was a narrow multistory house with small rooms. There was an older girl with me. Also in bed clothes. There was an office or attic above us. I am pretty sure my guide was there, but I don't' remember seeing him.

I remember one particularly odd series of visions that made me realize that the prelife planning process doesn't have to happen in a particular location as those books would suggest. As well, I got this overwhelming sensation that multiple lives were being planned out at once. It seemed like my guide was handing the two girls these index cards with notes on them. Detailing life themes. I remember my guide writing down stuff on the cards, and then I would take the card and go up into the attic space and check it out. I remember one card. It represented my next life. The card said i was to be a woman and live into my 80's. It had lines representing major people in my life and things I wanted to experience. And I remember looking amazed as I looked down and almost all the way down the card in all caps was two sentences that said, "You will be haunted again" And then saying that it was so I could help someone. Which startled me. Then I remember agreeing to it, saying I had experience in it now, and thought I could handle it better this time around.

And there was the point made that all lives happen at once, and that not everyone is available at the same time, place or circumstance. And life planning never stops as each lifetime evolves in continuous expansion. Like ripples in a pond that expand outward and meet to create new ripples in new directions. Forever in motion. And so every time a free will choice is made, or an experience creates an understanding causing mastery of the self, it impacts all the other lives and creates ripples and new plans. So in effect if the facet comes to such an understanding that the emotional energy of the moment is changed, the past and future is changed for that ripple. People always as if the past can be changed. It is changed through emotional energy. People also think that the future is always brighter, and more evolved. But what they don't realize is the future is now. For universe after universe souls transform their moments into pauses of enlightened remembrance. A past life shifts perspective and gains an understanding of emotional experience there by changing the plans of a future life. There by the desired need to experience something was surpassed by the present moment, thereby healing all the ripples of a facets timeline. It could happen in reverse as well. A future life gets into trouble by a free will choice over a particular emotional theme. Which opens up opportunity for a parallel life or a past life to learn to heal. That gained experience will then again heal the future and past.

I had other strange visions. Where I was in the this strange future. The planet seemed to be all city. Lots of glass like structures. There were cars going on huge vaulted hiways, and air traffic above that, and far above that were space vehicles coming in and out. And some of the towers reached all the levels so that traffic could come in and out and dock at each level. Just as the tallest towers reached space, they also reached far into the earth. One could take an elevator from the fire of the earth to the starts above. I remember being on the ground floor or level. I was walking up to and into one of these giant glass buildings. People were pulling up in these futuristic cars and limos. Pulling up and opening doors, stepping out on red carpets up to the door. I remember that somehow I knew some of the people. They were dressed up like they were going to the Oscars or something. I walked into the building and went to the elevator. But before I could push the buttons, (my intention to go to the space level); the doors shut and it went down deep below the earths crust. To where the mantle was. These 2 burnt up and diseased hard and scary looking guys got on, and then we when up to the space level. I remember getting out thinking that this would be the future level. Where everything would be perfect and evolved. We all got out of the elevator. I thought the two guys would start to cause trouble. But they were gentle and well behaved. Then my perspective shifted, and the character I was supposed to be turned into this rampaging madman and went about destroying stuff and hurting people. The two ugly scary guys held me down and stopped me. Then I woke up.

It was weird. But in another way, it was symbolic for time and vibration. Human notions of evolution, level, time, space, heaven and hell are misconstrued with impressions and beliefs of linear time and belief. The reality as multidimensional souls is a bit more complex and yet simple. Thought and emotional energy are what we are as souls. We co-create physical experiences to manifest ourselves in every way possible so that we can understand through remembering who we are. This doesn't happen in a linear, step by step motion in a single experience in a single dimension. It happens all at once, in ever expanding webworks along all that is. As humans we try to put labels on our experience and direct it's motion. We attempt to understand it by placing value and position on perceptions of self. High, low, side, past, future, alternate, degree, position, level, and provide each with description, rules, and place. But in reality, All that is; is subjective to point of view, feeling, and intentive creative thought of the self. The journey of consciousness. Not vibration, not evolution, not energy. Consciousness. Who am I?

As humans we hope for advancement and betterment. We hope to shift into ever greater awareness. But, it's good to keep in mind. That in universe after universe, souls have been in the business of consciousness exploration for infinity. And infinity is not linear. Nor are we. Your past, present, or side self can be just as or more advanced or enlightened as any future self. The determination is made on view of experience, and the understanding within each new awareness of the self and it's place in all that is. What's important is how you feel about yourself now. Who are you now. It's that moment that is truly who you are.... but not all...

***

Channeling & communication tip:

A lot of people sit waiting for a voice to spontaneously appear in the middle of their head. While that does happen, just as voice can appear out of thin air. It's rare. In my own case I have to connect first. That doesn't mean setting my intention and waiting. It doesn't mean putting a thought out there and waiting. It means projecting an image in my minds eye and thinking at it as if it was spirit. It means holding the feelings that image engenders and thinking at the feeling and without stop, but for the barest pause treats any and all thoughts, even should they have my voice, any thought, feeling, sensation, image that is pulled on, felt, or observed AS being them. That's what channeling is. It requires the allowance of disassociation of thought from the self. That form is then funneled and pulled through a perception, run down a channel to output. Don't know if that makes any sense. But channeling and communication is rarely about waiting. They'll be there on their terms, but if you want active participation outside of this life, I find it best to meet them halfway. Go to your image of them, and accept whatever happens next.

October 15, 2012

Nothing too much to blog about. Getting over a cold still....I am feeling mostly better. Got the slow crawling cough, but feeling OK. I sound like Patty and Thelma from the Simpsons tv show.

***

To the student of spiritual communication:

Other people's feelings and perceptions of YOUR Spiritual experiences, beliefs is NONE of your business. The weight of your subjective experience is and will always be your objective reality. Their views of what you share in a public fashion, be it visions, spiritual interactions, past and future life, or present thought is always going to lack full context and understanding. Very often they are going to take what you share and compare it to their experience. But know this. It can't be done in a way that will fulfill your souls purpose. Each life and perception of experience is going to be very unique. So don't worry about what others say. Just do your best and let the rest go. ---as Erik frequently reminds me

October 12, 2012

I've added a new tab/ section to the site. "Messages". It's still a bit of a work in progress.

I'll eventually be merging it with the messages channeled for the C.E. community in Elisa's forum and selected text here in this sites archives, and putting into a book.

***

The moments before dawn are some of the most meaningful to me. It's that quiet space, where I feel like all that I am is suspended alone between what was and what is to be. I am not sure why, but alone with myself in that quiet space of twilight's shadow, and the soft blankets of my bed, I feel more in touch with who I am and Spirit. Its almost like it's a forced pause. A moment to taste flavor. I'd like to think it's in those moments my loved ones in Spirit see me best. When my mind stops looking, and my heart just feels. That seems like me. If they are with me then, I am glad. I'd like to share myself in that moment. Even when sad, that's me. In the pause of the moment. I'd like more of them.

***

You can't fix what's outside of who you are. You can only open or close your heart. Everything else is just a heartbeat away. It's close to the pulse of life, but it's only when you open up, that you are gonna feel the flow of life as yourself.

***

When you feel the weight of today's issues press heavy on your heart, and you can't understand why others would engage in such painful experience, you've taken yourself out of the present moment. It's not that you should care or love less, but that your identity hungers for the action of stable creation. Here's the thing though, Chaos gives birth to creation forever in motion, forever changing. We get stuck thinking change is coming and going to destroy what we think we are. But that's just an illusion. Who we were was then, moving to possibility. When change hits us, we pause and seek to stabilize how we see ourselves, we do this by engaging action. When we don't answer that action, most often the question, "who am i", we encounter a resistance. And so that energy overwhelms us, and we feel stuck. The way to get unstuck is to stop looking at others, things, and life around us, because we are not there. That was then, or yet to be. We are only now. So look back inside your heart, and take action. What can I do, think, say, that feels like me. Who am I now. With acceptance of this being your ultimate reality, You can express and send love from a place of stability. This intention will always guide you to the next baby step. More creative action, in a chaotic world.

***

Living life

acting on intention held

as moments make you pause,

your heart will guide as your soul planned.

***

Some times, there is argument over what light is the best light. What protects, what heals, what shines, what grows, what shadows fear to tread. Personally, I prefer happy thoughts. When I think of happy thoughts I can imagine who is with me, what we are doing, and what I intend. How do I see myself as Spirit with those I love? In that feeling my guides, Angels, and loved one's hold my hand, and I thank them for their love. In that light I imagine us dancing. In that feeling there is no shadow to tread. (yes, this is rather symbolic isn't it? Then again, so is anything physical)

October 11, 2012

Actions don't need to mirror insecurities,

Others peoples emotions don't need to drive either of yours.

***

Communication can and will always get lost in translation, be it across channels, wires, waves, or cables. Even between people face to face we can only receive what our perceptions, perspectives, feelings, thoughts via our beliefs allow us. Better not to worry too much and assume the best heart. You may indeed get burned from time to time, but you'll often find you have more room to grow. After all, in the end....well that's all a view as well isn't it...

***

A very close friend of mine and fellow medium, got some great advice from Erik the other day in regard to helping teenagers. I though so well of it that I wanted to share the gist of it. After my conversation with her, Later that night, Erik M. tried to clarify it with me. He said,

"Rather than punish a kid, have the child write a paper on their experience. It doesn't matter if it was a misjudgement, a mistake, or error, but rather than make that assignment of feeling for them. Ask them to write about how they are feeling, how they saw it and what they learned. Encourage them to be honest even it what they write sounds raw, painful or even dishonest. Because what will happen is that it will help cement that energy of the experience, and carry what was gained, learned and understood from it beyond this life and allow them to use it as an anchoring point for growth. Besides.... learning to express your self in positive ways will be a good thing...."

***

Consciousness and identity is born:

"The action taken, from the drive to make valid inner desire; to know through self creations; in material ways; creates a chaos. This process 'self creates' identities. This change, is forever in motion. This gives the illusion, of one sidedness. The other side, is that what is created, is done as a balancing action, where identity recognizes itself in the creation, and finds comfort, a satisfaction of understanding, creating and exploring the knowledge of self, by what it creates. Because the chaos of this process is in motion, its energy is forever transformed, directed, manipulated, absorbed, reflected, and transmuted by each new creation. This is eternal growth. So what might seem destroyed by chaos is always revealed to be more, in every way. This paradox, this illusion duality, is not two separate forces but a unified process, a force, a source of all energy.

The by product of these actions is consciousness. Self awareness is never a matter of peace, or balance, but is a product of the motion in creative play. As such, we or the i of us, is never a thing, a life, or even a view. It is a moment, a state of being, between movements. Who am i now?, how about now?, now? This process in its entirety, IS you. When you try to separate yourself from that movement, you falsely, or via self illusion, look outside and engage an ego. In actuality, it is not possible to be less than the total sum of your parts.

The only validity you can hold to experience, are the associations you connect with in this moment. That energy is not held outside of yourself as unmovable matter. Change how you feel, and what you associate with the past, and you change your ultimate reality into something more. Don't resist change, flow with it" --- lessons with my spirit teacher

***

So as you may recall from a previous entry I have this new dream experiment going.

According to a book I am reading it doesn't matter too much if one remembers, only setting the intention and suggestions right before sleep in a meaningful specific way, and then seeing how you feel when you wake up. But the key is to ask your peeps (spirit team) and higherself for problem solving dreams, or healing dreams. Then your probable selves, alternate reality selves, past, future, ect,. can help you via dream experience.

For a month, each night right before bed, I am going set my intention to what I want to dream about as it pertains to emotion and life. A spirit who's work I am reading, wrote;

'In dreams we can work out scenarios and experiences that we aren't able to in this view of life.'

So for example I could say, 'I want to have a dream where I work on problems with communication, intimacy, anger, self love'; or even ones like, 'I want to have dreams where a past life can help me now, or a dream where Eric and I hang out or some such.... And I am going to try and note how I feel each morning and see what I remember.

That said,

My Dream intention from two nights ago......

"Past lives..... help me to write to a friend about letting go of personal pain, that feels like it's about me, but is really about others life plans.... ie......!!!... This is something I go through as well, which is why I think I am drawn to this person and topic... so yeah.. this will be a good thing! :) (wink)... letting go of others plans.... letting go ..... letting go... love .....sleeep....."

haha.....:)

--------------

Here is what I wrote in my dream journal:

"So the next morning, I stayed home from work as I was sick. That night, I had hardly slept. My Guides seemed odd that night....had very weird dreams. One ive had before! Very weird. Starts out like a cross between a symbol dream and childhood memories from this life at my old church grounds, and then it gets very futuristic.

I am in a desert. Sand. Plants and sun is weird. Iam in a sheltered greenhouse that looks weird and is filtering out weird harmful stuff or the environment isnt enough to make things grow right. I am an author i think. I think i might be married to Nikki but maybe divorced? One kid dead maybe, we are trying to heal the rest. Iam doing a weird experiment burring myself in some funky sand next to these funky plants in this funky place, i think its to prolong life. The plant look like spiky desert plants. Many are in huge pots with roots coming out and into the sand. This is some kind of forbidden experiment. There is huge controversy. People try to stop me, but I sneak and do it anyway. It works. It prolongs my life and is saving the kids. Weird...

That's all i can remember except for weird environmental details. I am going back to bed. Still sick. Day 4. At least i can sleep more. I feel mentally good and happy, just tired and ill.

-------------

Possible meaning??

"You have to bury yourself in life, where ever and however little, you can no matter the situation, environment, or danger, or hardship. Bury yourself next to life, sleep in its arms, next to root, ash, and renew yourself. remove what poisons. Even if you are shunned, or hounded or go against people or stand out. Because the work you do to heal and live helps others do the same. No matter time, space, or world" or maybe it was from a future life.... I have no clue... but it was a really wild dream... It was lucid. I knew I was dreaming. And it was like I was watching an interactive movie.

-------------

Now as far as this morning goes,

Only dream i remember is an annoying one involving me in school. i think trying to drive around this girl in a car and arguing about a map. Oh and we kept trying to get around a dump truck., and i think there was a haunted hotel.

Why cant i dream of mountain streams, ponies, and cake?

October 11, 2012

How to have a lucid dream, A really cute video.

http://youtu.be/lYSX51xBkos

Have you ever wanted to take control of your dreams? Now you can, with the science of how to lucid dream! With these simple steps, and a little practice, you'll soon experience sleep like never before.

Written and created by Mitchell Moffit (twitter @mitchellmoffit) and Gregory Brown (twitter @whalewatchmeplz).

TWITTER: http://www.twitter.com/AsapSCIENCE

FACEBOOK: http://www.facebook.com/AsapSCIENCE

Music by Mitchell Moffit

http://www.mitchellmoffit.com

http://www.twitter.com/mitchellmoffit

http://www.facebook.com/mitchellmoffit

Art by Gregory and Mitchell

http://www.gregorybrownart.tumblr.com

http://www.twitter.com/whalewatchmeplz

Some Sources---

1) http://www.lucidity.com/SleepAndCognition.html

2) http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19750924

3) http://bit.ly/vkD3oM

4) http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2012/07/120727095555.htm

5) http://www.amsciepub.com/doi/abs/10.2466/pms.1980.51.3f.1039

October 10, 2012

Q & A

Jason asks Elle --

( spirit gang member, and good buddy Nikki's guardian angel, and all around awesome peep)

[grin]

*** ***

Dear Elle and the gang,

Jason here, I'd like to ask you about what's been on my mind lately. I've been having this inner struggle. About how to respond or how one can think when one finds one's self using pleasurable experience as a mask or substitute to the feeling of lack or the lack of personal joy, or pain in all forms. You know, there are many examples, but you know, in general... when we seek escapism or any kind of fun, or enjoyment, you know...because we hurt inside, or we feel lazy, (that's a mask too--yeah I know) or we feel like we should be doing something we feel is worthwhile, productive, helpful, to others and ourselves, but for some reason we feel this resistance. Because we are not looking at the pain in us. Do you know about what I am talking about?

What can the Angels say to us here in life, about this sort of thing? This is all over our world, not just in these 'feelings" of mine, day to day, moment to moment situations, but even in our culture. You know we hear it all the time from TV or the media, "I wanna be rich, party, have lovers, live the good life, why can we just get along, get over it man".. that sort of thing...

We know we are in pain. But we are hiding. We know we should look at joy, but we look outside of ourselves. How can we better think of this, without sounding too crazy or new agey... You know, what would moms and Angels in the front lines say?

Now, we all know and have all talked about this sort of thing time and time again through the ages.... But if Elle, and the rest could really boil this down in a no non-sense way, what would they say?

Same question, but what do you say if someone says doing what makes one happy and joyful is just a mask for not looking at what hurts. There is a poignant moment around pondering happiness, joy, escapism and avoidance and self exploration and pain, lack and fear.... I know something can be said, but I am just hovering around it on the tip of my tongue..

I am writing this rambling musing and question mainly (yes), because I come across it in my own life all the time, but also because I see it in friends of mine. I am not complaining because it helps me look at myself... but,... I am serious, in that I am interested in hearing others thoughts on this about life in general... I really do think the more people and Heaven talk, the easier life gets. I really DO!

Anyway, like I said, Just this week several of my friends mentioned stuff like this in their own lives, while I was addressing this in my life. So I am always keen to hear what you all think, including what Nikki thinks as a mom.

OK, thanks

xo--Jason

*** ***

Nikki to me:

I wasn't going to respond right now, but Elle seems to think otherwise.

She is funny BTW and sort of cutesy smart ass.

Her responses are channeled below.

*** ***

Elle To Jason:

"Those that appear "to not get it" are reminders and distractions of the choices we have. Like you often say Jason, "is it love"?, because real joy IS love. If what one is seeking is not based on love, it will never be JOY. It can bring temporary pleasure only. There are many forms of happiness, but there is one true experience of JOY. If you look deep enough, if you want that feeling bad enough, you will move past the material, the temporary and concentrate on the eternal. Eternal Joy can only be LOVE.

Looking at pain is not a necessity in finding JOY and LOVE. It can be their for the experience of duality or as a reminder to refocus. Pain and sorrow often jolt us to choose our paths wisely. There is nothing wrong with a life of happiness and material possessions, but it rarely makes one look within and remember the eternal love and the incomparable joy it brings. We set up bumps in the road for ourselves. Some are more jolting than others. It does not mean you were missing subtle reminders, it is this event, this pain that your soul planned, to remind you of the one true JOY. Every path, every journey is different. Once one chooses to find Love, they will put the pain aside. They are not masking the pain or the sorrow when they choose happiness, but if they are not going within, it will be temporary. Once they are on the path to eternal love the pain will seem to subside. It is never wrong to choose love and joy over fear and pain." -- Elle

*** ***

From Nikki to Jason

What I think as a mom, is that in a very odd way, the greatest gift I have ever been given is the loss of Eric. Despite a huge hole in our physical lives, his suicide has reminded me of who I really am, of all that I can be and of the reality I can create for myself. There is no separation, just a change in communication. Eric is here, always. I have never felt this type of love or joy or peace prior to his death. I know, with every fiber of my being, that my soul planned this. It was time for me to choose love instead of fear and to know that true joy is only that which is based on eternal love.

*** ***

Elle: ---- "by George I think she's got it" :)

*** ***

[jason post note]

(BTW.... George is one of Jason's nicknames for Erik M.... co-inky-dink..hmmmm?)

*** ***

Jason to Nikki:

[jason post note]

(note: pardon the rambling message... it's cut from multiple emails throughout the day)

Wow..this response really really felt good!!! Especially with inner feeling and thoughts to go along with it. And Eric is so funny. He said to me,

"Feel better?"......(while showing me a minds eye visual of him handing us martinis....at a round table in a jazz club and you in a sequence dress toasting a drink and everyone laughing.[past life?] ) One could say, "Life......the grand party to remember the eternal joy....not the party, not the clothes, not the drinks, not even the drama, just us"

And interestingly enough.... one of things I asked in my new dream project, was to have spirit help me with dreams of past lives to help me with issues now.

I am starting this new thing at night.

For a month, each night right before bed, I am going set my intention to what I want to dream about as it pertains to emotion and life. A spirit who's work I am reading, wrote;

'In dreams we can work out scenarios and experiences that we aren't able to in this view of life.'

*** ***

Jason to Nikki:

Yeah! So I started that "dream intention" thing last night. Even though I was sick with a cold.

It seemed to work.

Although I don't recall the dream specifically..but you were in it, although you were not you now....

I am sure I was a bit addled. Still sick. But feeling much better.

I sort of sound like a truck stop waitress asking for cigs...ha ha....in any case I digress...

Last night I stayed up until almost 11 pm. reading and was pretty tired,

and feared not getting any real sleep if I asked for some busy dream,

so I was all..... "ok gang..... I want a dream from a past life that will help me now".,

but then I was like. "oh, wait no... I am really tired. give me something... that I'll find comforting and companionable with Eric and Earl"...

then I was all...

"oh, no wait, my number one priority is to get enough rest I get over this cold and make it through the day without hacking a lung up."

ha ha..

Then I fell asleep.

*** ***

Jason to Nikki:

According to the book I am reading it doesn't matter too much if one remembers, only setting the intention and suggestions right before sleep in a meaningful specific way, and then seeing how you feel when you wake up. But the key is to ask your peeps (spirit team) and higherself for problem solving dreams, or healing dreams. Then your probable selves, alternate reality selves, past, future, ect,. can help you via dream experience.

According to the book the "I" of the dream scape is just as real as the "I" of the physical. Only, where ever the consciousness is focused, the other seems dream like.

Tomorrow I'll set my alarm a tad earlier and then type a text in my phone right when I wake up as to what I dreamed. I'll let you know.....

*** ***

Jason to Nikki:

Synchronicity??

So yeah, back to that dream from last night......

And in that dream.... and .... the Eric & Earl vision as I mentioned where you were you, but not you, and I couldn't figure it out....

Then just now, (see message above) after you channeled that bit from Elle.... (the visual Eric gave me was):

'A table in a jazz club, round, a raucous party, streamers in the air, lights and music, and you in a flapper sequence dress, crossed legs sitting on my lap, martini in one hand laughing your ass off, me drunk I am sure, and lots of people around the table. And Eric was there too. Makes me wonder if the dream and that blip were connected. Don't know, but cute to think so.. oh, and when I checked your reply on my cell phone just now..... the subject line was cut off due to screen size, but it said, ....

"For some day when your in the z"

Z's the name of one of my spirit guides!

So I feel this was really right on track with where I should be.... and interesting enough all this totally mirrors a lot of what those Elisa/Erik m. Buddha interviews were saying too,.

And on another note, I am going to grab some more cold meds! woot! :)

Thanks again for all the messages and help!

*** ***

Jason to Nikki:

(later that night in a channeling session)

(Jason's guides follow up with him: (Eric & Erik & and the rest of the gang) [da boys]

"As a souls we want to understand what love is. We know, but we think to express it; we have to know and understand what love isn't. That's where we get stuck. We are often in so much pain experiencing what love isn't, that we forget we wanted to show what love IS. In the midst of what love isn't, we wanted to express 'US'. But a better way, A better way, is to simply 'BE' us. Our selves. To Accept ourselves as perfect by default. To live as US. You know that song, 'I wanna know what love is'..., It' should also be, 'I wanna understand what love is'..... NO! .....I wanna LIVE ... Live love, as I see it. So just LIVE life with what ever love you want in each moment, not what love you think' is, or what you think' should be love, but the love you "know" you are... by just doing it, you experience it. AND since you know you ARE, you will be inclined even.... but..... for a tiny..... bit, to "create" MORE. You do this by default, but NOW you are on your way to UNDERSTANDING it..... And in that moment, there is NO worry. NO fear..... There just IS... you... so let go of worry, and just BE.

You can be as strong as yes or no. Any thing else is just may-be. Say yes to love.

We judge what we see or create around us, because we think' it will say something about who we are inside, but what's happening is that we aren't coming to acceptance with what's inside. We are just rejecting what's outside as 'not us'. It's only we stop making value judgements about outward expression that we can look at what's inside. We can't even ask questions about what we feel. Until we stop looking at that stuff, we are always reaching for or pushing away. On the inside, there is nothing to create, reach for, or push away. It's always there. Always has been, always will be. It's just a matter of how much of ourselves we are really willing to look at. It's only when we rip the blinds off and look at ourselves raw, fresh and in that moment that we can say... OHhhh, I can let go of all that... even now... I am worth something, something I can share, I don't need to matter, because I matter to me." -- The gang

*** ***

Nikki to Jason:

Very cool Jason,

So.I have..more to add. You know that song, "Love on Top" by Beyonce? It is MY SONG. I have loved it since H. danced to it at one clinics and well I have taken ownership of it. Making H. put it on the Black river play list. Making K. put into the tailgate playlist etc. And M. and Eric seem to use it to catch my attention etc.

I didn't hear it for a while and figured it had dropped off the pop chart and I was kind of sad, well its back! And today I heard it several time. Got in the car and on the way home I hear it and I think 'LOVE ON TOP'. Hell yeah, it should be on TOP, its all that matters. Love in on the top of the list the top of the emotions/experiences etc. It is the top!

Next was up on the radio Que was "GET TOGETHER" by the Young Bloods from 1969. I have been hearing it over and over and over which is odd, given it is so old. Oh, how this song reminds me of everything awesome in grade school. They used to play this at the guitar mass at church and I just loved it. We listened to it in the classroom during art. The words are very meaningful. Especially,

Love is but a song we sing

fears' the way we die

You can make the mountains ring

or make the angels cry

Though the dove is on the wing

and you may not know why

*Come on people now

smile on your brother

everybody get together

and try to love one another right now

Some may come and some may go

He will surely pass

When the one that left us here

returns for us at last

We are but a moment's sunlight

fading in the grass

*Come on people now

smile on your brother

everybody get together

try to love one another right now

If you hear the song I sing

you will understand...listen

You hold the key to love and fear

all in your trembling hand

Just one key unlocks them both

Its there at your command

October 10, 2012 -- post note.

Tonight as I post this session/ blog post .. as a lot of it was coming about, it made me think of everyone I've encountered since meeting Erik m. and Elisa online, and how much I appreciate all of you. Due to life in general I often don't get a chance to thank those that have touched me the most. And even though we've not been able to meet, touch base, understand one another and even help each other at times, it's the sharing that has healed me the most. Even though we are hundreds and thousands of miles away, I just wanted you all to know how important each and all of you have been to my own journey and that each and every shared story I have ever had with you all, both private and public has meant a great deal in showing me how to love myself. I just can't imagine me without each of you. I hope that if not in this life, that on the other side we will all find the love to remain friend forever. And even though in this life I often don't know how to say it, I just wanted to take a moment and say I've love each and every one of you.

October 09, 2012

Message from a mentor of mine and Nikki's Guardian Angel, Elle

"The work at hand is not meant to feel like work.

Your experiences, your journey to remember who you are should be filled with joy and happiness.

Let go of all that you do not enjoy.

There are many paths, many opportunities. Of course the daily rountine can be filled with that which you do not enjoy. But when you have free time and unscheduled time, you need to make the best of it.

Remind yourself of all that you are here to enjoy, a walk, a book, a look at pictures of loved ones. You have many opportunities to see and experience love. Each and every day is a gift.

As you surround yourself with love and all that brings you joy , you remember your connection to divine love and light. You remember all that you are capable of and this will bring about a cycle of abundance and joy. Remember this is a journey, you have choices, you can choose love and joy over and over. Make the best of what you have.

Ask your angels for guidance, they too know what brings you joy. Take the time to look within and see where your higher self guides you.

Soak in the beauty, the joy and moments that you are in tune with all of your greatness."

***

Give without expectation of acceptance.

***

Allow yourself charity in rejection for it is not yours to reclaim what was given.

***

Have faith that souls know what they are about with as much faith as you have in yours.

***

All that pains does not have to pain. That which pains doesn't have to be necessarily be healed by you. Some of the greatest sufferings comes not from wounds, but from others watching growth. Then again some of the greatest of joys come from the same growth. Think of perspective.

***

When we fear a possible past, beyond our willingness to presently engage it, we take ourselves out of the present moment, which negates any probable future from taking place. It simply creates a resistance, that vibrates with stagnation, holding the discomforting feelings in place. It is only when we send love and acceptance to that past, for whatever came of it, that we can return to the present examination of who we are. In this moment, we become free to engage a possible experience which will be more inline with who we really are.

***

The energy you put into worry over the past is the energy you use to keep from living now.

October 08, 2012

Faith is a fickle thing. Its often seen as a belief outside of ourselves. A place, or placement upon we either see ourselves apart of, apart from, or just a part within. Often we seem to reject it as not about us but a view someone, God, or rule separate from us would force upon us.

Really though faith isn't about a belief . Its about acceptance. When we accept we are allowing ourselves to create our experiences without resistance to ourselves. This freedom is what allows the connection to our higher-self to channel joy on all things.

When we allow ourselves to feel comfort in whatever our life situation is, we are not acquiescing to pain and suffering we are simply accepting or holding conscious awareness that we are more than this experience, we have other purposes we intend, and we are capable of creating joyful experience. This is faith.

Faith of purpose is more than just task, duty, mission or goal. It is participation of co shared feeling through experience.

Think of a mother and child. No matter what happens or doesn't happen in life. These two can experience many forms of love and joy. Through the mother, the child can know love and learn how to love others and be taught how to love himself. Through the child the mother can learn the contrasts of unconditional love, and conditional love. Teaching, guiding, healing, and bring attention to emotional self healing. A parent can heal themselves just as much as their child. The.child can teach just as much as the parent. So you see, all this happens not because of a belief in a world view, or something someone told you to think, but because you have accepted and allowed yourself to simply Be in this life. You had faith enough in yourself to come here and create purpose. In this you can not fail. Your experience have great worth to your soul.

So even should pain and suffering seem to overtake you. Remember your faith. For like all life, you have purpose. You created it. There is nothing to fail. It is already done. You only need accept yourself as capable of something even more joyful.

***

Your intended reaction meets your intended purpose in a forever unique moment. Within this moment you have the opportunity to remember yourself, choose new intentions, create new purpose. Within that moment, who you are will never be the same. It is true that reaction, intention and purpose can move from moment to moment, as well, opportunity is and can be ever created and given. But the uniqueness of choice that being aware of yourself in that moment can never be the same. The circumstances you have brought to life in your life was for a unique expression and it is integral to the specific opportunities that moment holds. So while we can resist our awareness, or remembrance of ourselves in life, letting the moment pass us by, we might rejoice that we have a choice to be aware of ourselves consciously and choose how to react, and to what ultimate purpose we will channel it into. We can choose our intentions in each unique moment. Its worth being aware of. Every moment of who we are is unique. It is worth living for, worth choosing life for.

***

Putting demands on the conditions of life will never define your life purpose. Only when you release your demands will you find the freedom to create joyful purpose while living life

***

Time marches on,

and dusk never seems to set.

Its not that dawn never rises,

its that you have been like the sun

and never has your light

left my eyes.

For i look not

into shadowed past

nor glories of tomorrow

but as you stand with me,

my vista stretches out

as a single eternity.

I can not tell

from when

nor where i began,

only that we are.

My heart swells with such place,

though i dare not claim it

i know i belong.

Perhaps this great sense of time

is not when

nor place,

but simply the space

i found love

for you.

***

There is no true evil, only lack of perception, blind perspective,erroneous belief, and yet to be experienced understanding.

***

It is important to note. To the student, hidden emotion, or un-looked -at issues have a way of manifesting themselves on other planes of reality. Rather that being separate from us they are often created by us to play out, work out, resolve and heal emotional soul issues. To the clairvoyant and the dreamer these can seem frightening. They can even manifest as illness physically. But know this, even in moments of distress and partial awareness one can come into a choosing of love vs fear.

***

How does one tell those who make the heart strings sing

that the sound of joy comes when thoughts of them are felt?

Is this what it means to be connected

to a soul or is it infatuation of longing?

What is the nature of longing?

I think sometimes it is not the desire

of something missing,

but the desire to share.

When the desire to share oneself

becomes greater than the desire to take

it is then that longing can be fulfilled

by singing with one's true heart.

I am sure each of you know by now,

That you hold one of those strings.

***

You may ask why I go to such great effort all the time to tell you these things? It's simple. Your not alone. Never have been, never will be. Life can be a bitch, but that's not what keeps me coming back. It's the music we play together. The music of our hearts. That's true life. That's you.

***

People often write to me and sometimes feel embarrassed that they are somehow broken, and they are ashamed to share their problems.... I think sometimes because they assume I don't have the same issues and problems they do.

They shouldn't worry. I am the same...Sometimes, I have terrible dark thoughts and moments..... for example... I've had thoughts like these:

I feel like the worlds biggest freak, a broken hypocrite. Me, with a fukd up relationship w my fam. Common marital problems like anyone else. A mother -child thing with complex emotional pains, a father and other family who rarely speak to. Weird stuff w my brother. And a handful of deceased relatives, who I know are there but I have no communication With. It feels like no one knows me. Friends who are thousands of miles away and don't really know me, and I'll most likely never meet. The only people who know me, I can't see, touch, nor are they able to share their lives with me. Spirits. Those whom it feels like know me are dead and half the times, I am scared of them. Here I am trying to give advice and encouragement to people I've never met, when I am just the same as them. I am telling people to live and love when I don't or am not willing to do so myself. I say live yet I am just waiting to die. At least they have or had the balls to try or do it...i just choke on the ash of empty tears and shame. Yea me. I am fucking crazy, but I was born to remember me and be free.

So you see, never think I don't get it..... I do.....I really do.. I am there with you.

October 08, 2012

Hope all is well with you. I've been fairly ill with a bad cold all weekend. Still am.

October 06, 2012

A few years ago, my friend and mentor Elisa Medhus said the following in conversation to her son Erik,

'Mistakes, failures, hardships in life, .....they bring us wisdom, compassion and soulfulness. As long as the defeats are stepping stones to success rather than weapons to sabotage self worth, it’ll all be okay, I have faith in you.’

And indeed, that is one of the most important things she has taught me as well. At the time though, I had a hard time believing it. That my own stepping stones could be a foundation to learn to love myself through fear, lack, and mis-belief about my emotions. I found that faith because of her faith in Erik, who helped me remember to have faith in myself. And so what would feel like loss, sadness, and great sacrifice, was for me to be a gift of love.

Today the 6th,

I will always hold in memory

of a brother, a friend, a father, a soul,

I wished I had known in his last life.

Till we meet again.

I'll hold your heart next to mine

and dream of you.

Till I hold your hand,

arm to shoulder,

I'll hold your memory

in my mind.

Till we speak again

I'll listen for your voice.

Till dawn breaks

over heaven's sky,

I'll walk through twilight

until we meet again.

Let's not speak of loss,

lets just sit,

and think of love retained.

Lets not linger in sorrow,

but swim up through life

to the light.

Help me reach out of darkness,

and step into the light of life.

Help me pray not for life lost,

here today, and gone to tomorrow.

But help me see

that these lives lost

are but dreams.

Help me wake from slumber,

and wake to see the light of life,

in that we'll meet again.

In love and light,

family we are all.

Lots of love, your friend always,

***

There comes a point in everyone's life. This point is never a singular event, or a pivot upon which the world changes, but it is a moment. It's a moment that can and will define you. There will come a pause, where the feeling of unconditional love will out weigh fear to such a degree, that you realize that in it's light everything you thought you experienced, everything you thought you knew, matters not. It's the realization that you own nothing but that which is in your heart, and it can never be taken away from you. You can never be less than that love. Because at that moment, that moment you feel this, that is how much love you are capable of expressing in equal measure.

It's a moment worth living for.

October 05, 2012

One of life's greatest accomplishments and most significant challanges, is to gain enough experience with life, to consciously pause in the midst of whatever is going on, and ask of one's self, "Is this me, Is what I am feeling, Is how I am reacting in line with how I see myself, my highest possible self, what am I willing to do right this moment about it?".

October 05 2012

Q & A cont.,

I suddenly remembered the question I was going to ask you the other day... and oddly it was triggered by reading an old post on the site that was an email between you and Elisa.

You said:

"Sometimes, I touch my ear and I think, OMG I have a fever, but it’s just my left side! Erik says it’s to better connect. "

Which made me wonder, What is it with the left side? When I have clairvoyant vision - it's almost always skewed off to the left. Not every single time, but most of the time. Erik always comes in from the left (except maybe one time). When I was practicing telepathy with Shane (my husband), I would see his visual cues for whatever number he was thinking off to the left... but when I would get things from my guide, they would come in directly in front, and occasionally I would get really quick visions - so fast I couldn't even tell what they were usually - off to the right side. And it's also weird - when I get things from Erik they're always in color... stuff from my guide was more like sepia toned. I know I've heard that the left side is the "receiving" side - just curious as to the hows and the whys of which side, how fast and why in color. I assume a lot of it has to do with the personal preference of the spirit doing the communicating.

Alright - here's another. I've always been able to see... I guess I would call it a person's energy field. I don't necessarily consider it an aura (although I suppose it's part of the aura) - no color to it, just... like about 2-3 inches around a person that is "more light" than everything else. Kind of fuzzy..ish. My psychic development teacher said she thought it was the first layer of an aura. Thoughts ? Also, if I stare at anythings aura long enough - I can see purple. And if I stare at myself in the mirror long enough - I see purple... and yellow. Just some weird after image sort of thing, or something else?

As you know; just as we have physical organs, we also have the equivalent of spiritual or energetic ones. They connect the chain or series or grouping of energy bodies that are connected through dimensions etc, to our higher self. From readings I've done; some researchers feel it is these our GA's and Guides connect to. In some cases this is a more elaborate relationship, where the connection is permanent between the higherself and the personality facet for so as long as that personality retains conscious free will to perceive itself as separate. In other cases these points or spots in the energy body-physical body become or are treated like communication ports, plug-ins if you will. In fact the standard Charka system is much more elaborate that most suppose. With many more chakras distributed along meridians of energy to fine points plugging into and along the various systems within the body on the molecular level. Very much like accupoints in Chinese medicine. Just as people are not purely symmetrical, in fact as in nature and the Earth itself, life gravitates to asymmetry. And so very often, there is greater ports for communication on one side of the body as opposed to another. But, many times this is a spirit preference based on ease of connection. But communication is not limited to one side or the other. Some would say this depends on male vs female energy, and while there is some instances where such reasoning is facilitated that is simply a human perception. Spirit identity should not be relied upon by location on the physical body, but rather by the emotions and thoughts such touch engenders. If a specific location is preagreed upon, then spirit identification can be used in that fashion. Many times, what would appear to be a specific spot on the physical body is quite simply a location of a minor chakra and a convenience for spirit. Think of them as little vortexes through which energy passes under the aura and is felt on the skin.

The same holds true for clairvoyant vision. Inner minds eye mental vision. Although it's more akin to left or right handedness. The point of consciousness on the various planes has a tendency to start and drift from various points of view depending on state of consciousness and perceptual experience. So on one hand vision could seem to come from above or below or either side or even down long telescoping tunnels or a even a series of rotating slides. Variation of seeming location and spacial origin will vary according to what chakra it is channeled through and which energy bodies it passes through. In this, inner vision, Color is also variable, and almost always is controlled either by experience of the participants OR the intent of the more experienced, or whomever is the higher state of being. But many times to the clairvoyent student vision of color vs monochrome is a matter of intent of the projector. There can be many reasons for this. For example vision with shadow, smoke, or dappled light is not necessarily of lower states, but rather that something is being kept from view because the viewer is not ready to know yet. Or the projector doesn't wish to share, or the viewer is not experienced enough yet to pierce the veil.

A) -- 2nd question

All physical life is pervasive with energy. And there are many origins and types of energy. How this is perceived varies greatly upon physical choice of incarnation, physical properties, experience and awareness, as well as beliefs. Not only that. Perception is always a shared experience between the sensory organs, the mind, and consciousness. And it is never consistent. So variation will occur. Many times what observers assume is energetic on a physical plane is actually the mind and physical organs translating something seen on the other planes along the observation point's energy bodies. Think of it as a 4D magic eye poster. The transparent static seen around physical bodies are these bridging connections. Which the Aura is a part of and connected to on the physical. Simply call it spirit energy. Putting it into a specific label or category would be counter productive because the energies seen is always in motion based on your emotional thought, belief, perception and state of being. Now if you see color and it is always one color, that is you looking through your aura. And as you describe, this would be so. Many times it is also one's GA, as they hold the same color energies as you do. After image, optical effects and gestalt experiences are by products of consciousness through the sensory organs and translated by the mind. While mundane they can also be insight into the spiritual. While there are often differences one can point to, there is not a hard and fast rule as materialists would claim. You are spirit, you are energy, and you are physical. There is no separation other than that which your beliefs enforce.

October 04 2012

You know how inconsistent I am with posting! ha! I am doing well, although earlier in the week I was experiencing some really heavy grief, anger, and in general emotional, mental and spiritual wonkiness. Several people I know said, it was the moon, and that lots of peoples emotional states were all over the map. I seem to be fine now. But for a while I was wondering what crawled up my backside and died! ha ha... Although now I have a cold. Sore throat. AND visiting relatives...

This is what I just wrote my friend S.:

"I am extremely empathic. And my life is stereotypically perfect. serious... so when this shit happens I feel utterly insane. So you know how I told you I was doing really well, but that it didn't mean anything. Wait a few days, I and I'd get bad again. I seem to pick up on emotion really easy, those I am connected to as well as whatever from around me. Often it seems to trigger past life emotion as well as any unresolved junk from earlier in my own life and well as present under the surface junk. Well, the past two days have been mind numbingly bad. Out of no where! Crushing drowning black pain. Last night was really bad. really bad. I kept thinking things like, everyone who's ever loved me, left me, everyone who've I've wanted to love, wasn't available to be loved. I hate myself, I want to die, I was having visions of jump off bridges, drowning, cutting and lashing out at people. It was so sick and oppressive I could hardly stand it. I seriously thought I was mentally ill and needed medication. Fortunately Eric k. and the rest bailed me out, so around 2-3 am I felt much much better. And this morning I felt better. Now I look back and can't believe that was me. wtf! where the hell did that come from.Today I talked to Sh. and she said she was going through the same thing. And I imagine Els. was too. And it's the harvest full moon. Lots of wonky stuff for empaths to be going through"

I am convinced empathy is never just about encountering others emotions, but it's also about having that happen though the natural physical forces of life, letting the two merge and then allowing it to transfigure and transform through the filter of one's own emotional energy. So that in many cases it will bring up emotion surrounding experience one has already deal with and mastered, or in which one still needs work. In any case we try to heal, absorb, process and then send it back out.

***

And Ashely, also mentioned weird emotions this week. So This is what I wrote back her:

Well, at least I don't need to explain why I haven't answered your spiritual questions of late, cause I've been to out of it to function beyond work and the garden. I was good most of the weekend. Really really good. I speculate that's because I was digging in the dirt all weekend. Usually there are a handful of friends and I tend to all feed off each other emotionally. You know, when one is in a bad spot the rest will feel it, or feel like we are taking it on. Well, I know a a handful of my friends were all doing horrid, and I was like, F-that, I am not calling you, I am digging in the dirt! and then I got crushed Sunday night and Monday... .. We used to call up Robert and ask him, WTF Robert and Erik what is going on,.... and he'd be all... "dude, your suckin on so and so's emotions". Which is all very odd. I usually go and hide in our basement and have myself a good cry and try not to let anyone see me... cause they'd be all, what is wrong with you.... and I'd be all.. I dunno... leave me alone, the dead are cuddling me...privacy please.. oh, lordddddd..... seee. med o cation! ha ha...

oh well. I am fine now. And that's what counts.

Just think... 100 years ago, they have locked me up and hosed me down with a fire hose!

Oh speaking of crazy..

I had a vision last night at one point during that episode, that I think was an actual spirit encounter OR an encounter with a parallel or past me. OR symbolic astral shit

ok.. while I was going through that last night. At one point while awake. I kept seeing a spirit from a really really weird perspective. I was like, or it felt like I was underwater on the bottom of a lake bed/mud.... or in a black box or something or a well. looking up through the water at a human torso and head that was outside of the water and back lit by yellow sunlight. And there was this water movement filter/ distortion effect on the image. And it appeared to be a woman, skinny, with super short hair. (although it could have been a man, I don't think it was) Looking down at me. arm extended out across the water or holding on to the other side of the well, wall, or space? and for some reason we knew each other, but I didn't know who it was, but I didn't want her to touch me, look at me, or get near me. I desperately wanted her to go away. And I lashed out at her, and as I did so, my hand and arm was claw like and black. And I screeched out, "NO, go away! Leave me alone!" and My arm would not get near her. Her image would shit, and move, every time I tried to claw, lash out, or shove her image away. And I even tried to take her head off and destroy the vision, and noting worked. The more violent I got, the image would shift and rotate around me. Until it faded away. And then I curled back up and came out of the vision and Eric was hugging me in bed. The whole experience was very weird.

***

I shared that with my friend Nikki who channeled her GA Elle and said the following:

"In any given situation, we, your angels, are here to help. It is and should be the first request. We can guide you and help you on your path. Some times we can only support you and let you go thru what has been planned. We give you strength and support. WE cannot alter something your higher self wishes to experience.

Often you go thru multiple encounters of the same kind. This is giving you the opportunity to remind yourself that you have a choice as to what you focus on and the associations made to that experience. Will you choose love or fear? Did the last encounter bring you joy? Is there an opportunity to look at things differently. Can you let it go? Can you make this a positive experience.

There are times when this is much more difficult than others. Your past lives, your journey thus far, may have set you up for an initial response of fear or lack of trust. Can you change that? Is there an opportunity now to take a step back and look at things differently. Can you find a happy experience to associate it to. Can you envision a positive outcome? Can this be a turning point. With the help of your angles and guides you can remember there is always joy. The ultimate outcome is the one you have chosen. You should rejoice in the opportunity to experience. The choice is always yours. ALways.

What may seem to be a negative experience is just a means to an end. An opportunity to reexamine your focus and perspective. You cannot fail, every choice is a part of your journey. We do not let you fail, ask for our guidance and trust that you are on the path that serves your higher self you are divine love and light, you are the creator of your reality, you have the power to do all that you desire. Trust in that, believe in yourself, you will do amazing work."

October 03 2012

Offline with family. Have a great week.

October 02 2012

Don't begrudge your wounds. The bloodied life is present for healing. Hard sores long dead fester.

***

We are often told that we "should" do unto others as we would desire for ourselves. Some would say this is natural to humanity.

As well, are often told that Guides and Angels direct us to purpose, plan, and task as our souls wanted, but...

When we hold the intention of being consciously aware to choose action and thought in line with how we see our highest possible self, we can arrive at a true peace with life.

***

Loneliness is often the refusal to look at your neighbor as yourself.

***

There is great pain to see in others. But there can be greater pain if one is blind to one's own heart. It is not that others pain and suffering should not be alleviated or healed, rather it is that our hearts often see a reflection in the world around us.

***

Hate can be like a great rampant bull. A wild animal. It can be many things in extreme duality. Natural, noble, driving us, and yet most often, as emotion, is is deemed negative, it is false, a guise. It calls to us that which is born of anger, fear, and pain, not because we really believe that about ourselves, but because behind it, there is something we wish to heal, feed, and understand. Rather than deny, reject and turn from that we feels hateful, it might be better to grab it by the horns, hold the beast in place, look it in the eye, and admit, it's not you or yours. Then gently thank it for the attention, and release it to the wilds. ps. Don't get yourself trampled...I'd miss you too much...yeah... :) (wink)

***

All that is.

Matter, life, thought, feeling,

each of your souls;

All are born of Light.

All shine with Light.

All reflect light.

Each unto it's own

is unique.

Each can be known,

each is known

by degree, clarity, and quality.

Inner luminance,

transforms, radiates, refracts, reflects outward

in directed purpose.

These can be seen not only as state of being,

but a calling card of identity.

We might know each other

by the light

we shine with.

We are known

as Spirit holding spirits of light.

It can not be hidden,

it is indivisible.

One may know another

in spirit as spirit

by observing the way

one see's the source of All Light

within another

and the way it is reflected back out to all that is.

How this is perceived

is a matter of experience.

The more experience,

the more aware the spirit is

of the possible spectrum's

of observance, a soul's light can be seen in.

The more possibilities that soul has to express itself in all that is.

These ranges

are always unique,

as are how a souls light is displayed against them.

All that is Light, Shines. How do you see yourself, in the light of your soul?

October 01, 2012

But that we all could feel some of a mother's pain to understand their love.

Even a fraction held to our own experience

the world might realize a mothers love as their own.

To all the mother's out there,

Knowing of your own love has helped me see who I am.

I am grateful for what youve shared of your journey.

For me in part because of you, I know that a better world is possible. A better life, a better way.

***

"Home" - Philip Phillips (ft. James Alan)

http://youtu.be/avkVG_NAYOQ

***

No evaluation of self worth, without understanding love for yourself, will lead to inner peace. You can let it be and just try to live life, but it will always reflect the level of your self worth. But, should you take that first step and put forth the courage to look honestly at how you feel, you will eventually come to an acceptance that you are worth loving. It's letting love be in your heart, that will change life as you know it. So let it be. Let it be love.

***

There are those

who's fragile beauty

hold the promise of wonder.

Short and tragic

their life may seem;

Often,

they do not realize

they rest in safe hands.

Not because they can't feel

or understand it,

but because perspective blocks their vision.

***

September 30 2012

Wait not,

do responsible joy,

live gracious forgiveness,

love yourself compassionately,

and serve in friendship.

Destiny is never found,

nor does it find you.

It is nothing more than acceptance

of purposeful intent

as you put one foot

in front of another

on a path if your choosing.

***