August 2012

August 09, 2012

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Want can be an attitude

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To float on the sea, my back to the depths, my face to the stars, Hold your hand, and watch the sun set.

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At the end of my day, all seemed smoke, mirror, and dappled moonlight.

The only thing I knew was that I longed for an embrace. It seemed any would do.

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It is not our job's, responsibility, or duty in life to overcome suffering, stagnation, or the feeling of getting stuck, but it is ours to come to terms with who we are. What is meant by that, is that we seek to find a point, or a moment, where we uncover or remember comfort. Coming to terms, acceptance, clarity, a remembering of ourselves. For some, this is seen as a balance of emotion within action surrounding a set of beliefs about one's self. For others this is about release of emotions that do not serve in self identification. Perhaps the one of the better uses of these processes are those who simply allow an intent to Be. To be more inline with whatever view of their highest possible self, in every moment. Again, this is not always easy. For one must proverbially sacrifice one's self on a cross of one's own making, burn or set light to the old on the pyre of experience. It is only after these understandings are purged, let go, processed, and understood in terms of who we are and who we are not, that room for new systems, new experiences, new beliefs about one's self can be explored. Within these new constructs new, more in line questions about the self can be created. What is important to keep in mind is that worry, fear, frustration, anger, etc., over doing, having, right, wrong, why, how, will never create motion releasing life's wheel. It is only by allowing space to just be, that personal comfort and acceptance, that we attain the freedom of choice over who we are and who we are not. The ultimate release and salvation is never an answer, but it lays in the creative power to ask, 'am I this, am I that', in choosing the question with alignment of how one views their highest possible self, one can gain the discernment to confidently take one step at a time on the path to self realization.

Another important step, on this journey is to participate in a support system. No one is an island unto themselves. If we can find, but one person who will allow us to stand before them and see our reflection through their eyes, we can hasten the remembrance of that point of comfort. It is important to reach out to those who resonate with our hearts. It's equally important not to put too much emotional identification into the desire to belong, otherwise we may succumb to the blindness of guilt, worry, and fear, when alignment of relationships shifts. We are all connected by the conscious energies of all that is. It flows through us, and in turns creates anew. There is never a point where true disconnect occurs, only the illusion of blindness when feelings about perception overwhelms the spiritual senses. Once a point of comfort is achieved and self creation is embraced, light is again shone through darkness and life seems reborn. So do not worry over those who seem to pass from your embrace, for it is a temporary illusion, that will pass as night into morning. Every night bird must sing it's song. The sad tale under the moon light can have it's own beauty. Look to those who feel like yourself. Let go with out guilt or worry those who don't. Hold to your responsibilities, and commitments that are born of love and willingness to serve. And do not worry over that which feels beyond you. For on your journey to find your true self, in that comfort of living in the now, you will be living to your highest possible self in such a natural way that what to do will come as natural as the rising sun. Your light shines by default and will gravitate to where it needs to go. Sometimes this light falls on a quiet empty path. It is not for you to worry where you are going, but to find peace with that path, or to plant what you may along it's winding marks. Sometimes that light falls along crowded highways and how you interact is more about simple participation in a way that resonates with you, and finding a peace in how you traveled along side others. But know a shared road can be a lighter road. Sometimes stopping off to the side of the road to help a neighbor can create opportunities that go far beyond the road traveled.

August 07, 2012

Be honest, but have compassion

Be truthful, but be loving

Be just, but be understanding

Be fair, but be discerning

Be clear, but intent-full

Be yourself, but have fun

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I've been lost in a rainbow

in place no one knows

Ive been here before

I can't remember

just a feeling

in shadow

clouds

light

I am lost in a slumber

dreaming I've known

Together we visit

just a feeling

in shadow

clouds

light

I know I'll wake finding

a place we've known

You'll be there

so will they

in clouds

nature

sun

peace in a rainbow of love

****

You can't fulfill expectation except by that which you've already attained right now. Otherwise you won't see what you can pour into that belief. Let go of what you believe about yourself and you will find expectations are nothing but noisy empty promises. It's only by playing with what you already have that you can create more.

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If the past defines you, embrace it with ownership. If it doesn't say anything about who you are today, simply thank it with love and compassion and embrace yourself for gained experience.

*****

Other's thoughts on their beliefs are good for exploring how we see ourselves in their reflection. Other than that, it's good to realize when our thoughts are not our own. Examine a belief to see if it resonates with us. The rest is smoke and mirror.

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When the world falls down

and life crumbles apart,

Dance in the flames,

kick up the ashes.

And know that

the passion of your movement

breaths air into rebirth.

So stomp when your angry

spin when your sad

leap when your happy

roll, skip, tumble, shuffle

but dance when your down

Dance in the flames

hot as a coal

cool as fire

burn till it's gone

and then leap through the air

and dance till you spark

and are light once more.

****

When It rains:

What do we do

when it hurts too much

to talk

think

speak

What do we do

When we are so tired

I don't know

when I will

ever see you

When the rain

when the rain

falls in heaven

I'll see you

waiting for me

What will I do

what will I say

think

When the rain

when the rain

falls in heaven

when I see you

Waiting for me.

****

Life can be very hard. Life is hard. We strive to work it out. If we do--- you and me, we'll be in a better spot to deal with what we do have. No magic energy wave of love is gonna rescue us... No alien is going to whisk us up and away from our personal emotional journey of enlightenment. YOU are gonna save yourself by YOUR hard work. Those that have worked hard on their personal issues are going to have a different perspective. An ability to realize that we are in charge of our life and have always been. Earth always has been a place of duality to gain personal emotional experience. It will remain so. Personally, The only thing that gives me that feeling of feeling of personal salvation, being saved, shifting or of there being more out there.... Is by sharing experience with those like yourself. To pass through, participate, create, and work to understand ourselves with others who are like us. To see that inspite, despite and because of the epxeriences those like Eric and Earl and our friends in spirit help us have, sometimes because of their pain, sacrifice, and life, that there is more, that they still exisit, and so must we. It's because of that I have hope, faith, and know of love that I can keep going. Even when it hurts like a damn mothafuckr. :) Everything else is looking outside of ourselves for escape. It's only by going within and addressing who we are, that we will shift our consciousness to an expanded state of being. ALL else is simply new ways of stating this metaphorically. Nothing is new. This process has been going on for all eternity. Life, the great journey of personal consciousness within all that is. Perception, perspective, belief, feelings, thought, creative imagination, intent, understanding. These are the corner stones of who we are. All else, is smoke, mirrors, and light. Balance that, and you will BE.

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Many things in dreams and clairvoyant vision that seem literal are highly symbolic. They pull from past lives, future lives, parallel lives, and heavily from the emotional issues of this life.

When one passes through life experiences, we very often 'shelve' or put aside understanding or conclusion of the experience in terms of psychological, emotional, and spiritual understanding for a later time. A time in which we would have more data or experience to reprocess or work out the issues or experience.

Many times this process; This for those who undergo physic experiences, this process is greatly accelerated. And so on an energetic level, Spirit helps us bring up all the emotional issues, the spiritual issues that still need to be addressed or brought to a conclusion. They are brought to the surface to be worked on, looked at, and dealt with. Once we do that, we can make room for the new. New beliefs, feelings, thoughts, and emotions. A new state of consciousness. Hopefully an expanded one.

So we bring these up through intensive inner self exploration, spiritual experiences and dreams, and many more. And when this happens, it can be in our best interest to sit down and stare what comes right in the face. This lets us make choices, and ask questions about who we are, and who we are not. If what comes up resonates with us, we can embrace it. If it doesn't and it's not who we are, or not who we are any longer, it is safe to cast it aside with thanks and love.

Putting the experience to bed. That's part of life too. Part of our inner life. This happens frequently in our dreams.

August 03, 2012

One particularly enjoyable "meditation" like activity I've greatly enjoyed from time to time over the years was practicing clairvoyant channeling by closing my eyes and visualizing to music for a half hour or less. Sometimes I did this while walking, sometimes by sitting on the couch, many times at my desk, most of the time in bed. But what is out of the ordinary from regular mediumship practice was simply meditating on loved ones past.

For example. I would just think of erik or my grandparents and try to visualize using memories and imagination a silhouette of their head, body or what not in an empty or filled room. Very often I would try to just focus on their face. Many times the room was just a cloudy foggy void. I would just picture the best I could, many times not so well, the contours of their face or how it might look. Try to picture them at different ages. And just revel in the feeling that gave me. Good, sad, happy or otherwise. Sometimes I would just visualize or imagine I was in their house or room and just slowly looking at all their things. Caressing it all with my inner eye.

Sometimes diving into memory and imagination can fuel visualizations that give birth to clairvoyant afterlife interaction, taking on a life of their own. No purpose but visualizing practice. No reason but exploring comforting connection. Set the intention of connecting with that visualization, those people and that they will impart something to help further that effort and send their love back to you.

***

And I walked

to where the the hills

met with the sky.

There among the poppies and lupine's,

I waited for you.

Though you had not yet come,

I was content

knowing your heart song

passed this way.

I could smell it's song

among the flowers.

***

I sail

heart

memories

though

half unseen.

Storm,

foggy shores,

and twilight dreams.

It would seem,

I am adrift.

On lingered

love,

lost

in arms

I can not

quite see,

but

I float.

***

Dont lament your words nor deeds for they were choices, rather look for opportunities to create more joyful choices in word or deed.

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Do not worry over words such as master follower guru teacher ....instead.....ponder what learning, friendship, and understanding you and your neighbor can each can share.

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Will i

Ever

Can I

Should I

What

Why

When

Tomorrow

Who

What

Choose

Say

Speak

Work

Now

Grateful

I give

Share I

Learn

You

Together

Know

Understand

Now

Iam

Eternal

Love

Blessed

***

My peace of mind only lingers for as long as i let thought of it go. And chaos reins forever as i look. Tremble not at waters edge and hold back not, for you'll never be able to look away unless you can feel from thought to eyes to hand.

***

Longing for what you may not have will only sift into what you can not, like sand through times glass you may only turn your gaze not to halt it's flow but to ponder the moment, never touching, but gazing at each grain. Better to turn it over and let it flow, again, and again until it matters not.

***

And I closed my eyes and remembered walking along the mountain trail. High-height overhead ancient trees sang sweet sap wintergreen pine across needled breath. Crunch crumble tumble gravel shifting with drips of morning fog, while the sharp cry of bluejay met the cardinal sang mountain sparrow, cried the crow. Cloud shapes above, sunlight dappled below, my heart gushed with exhaled relief. Slumbered light step, I crossed the long, the rock, the mesquite. Above is the sign, the way, I read to the overlook. That vast sky drop hundred miles fuzz of color where the earth plunges to ocean and pulls the cover of the sky over herself. The longing pulls me. Upon the crested trail, I gaze upon summer shimmer and look to my minds wish. Down down across across mountains, hill, plans and rock I imagine you waiting. I hold that image in my mind. I feel it with my tongue, like a mothers kiss, a friends arms, a lovers breath, and I see without looking. I know it. I create it with every heartbeat, and then I see myself in that picture. Suddenly I am there, and together we are forever.

August 02, 2012

If while reading, listening, or seeing a professing of ideas that makes you uncomfortable, it is not necessarily for you to internalize and apply fear, distress or worry. It is a type of focusing mirror for you to ask questions about yourself. Do I understand, Does this apply to me, Is this who I am, Does this matter to me, Does this say anything about me? With out asking intention questions, very often feelings of lack, less than, discomfort and worry will arise. These are not meant for you to hold, they are meant to help move to making a choice. In this information, am I going to choose love, or am I am going to choose fear. In that choice, who am I? Every moment you are in a position of emotional tug o war, you are at resistance from doing OR being in the now. Looking forward, backward, or outside of yourself. So worry not over nature you do not understand. Simply look inside you and ask a question, Who am I? There lays the truth. You are not worry, you are not concern, you are love. It's that easy. So fear not, worry not and let others labels, opinions, view and understanding be the reflective tool they are. Let what vision is not love and light pass in the new mornings light.

***

Keep your soul music. You don't need to say nothin, your a part of me. one day we'll wake up from this life, and if there's a ghost of a chance, I'll be following you.

***

I speak, Who am I? I think, am I? I see, are you? This body mine, co-created life began as one. One with millions of parts from life's history. My limbs hold me, my eyes look at you, and I hear your heart next to mine. It all comes from that which began as one. Some say these millions of parts within this body die and are reborn within several years. If that's true, who am I then? Where does this point of I see you reside? I am not this body.

***

When I was a small boy, I wanted to explore the world.

When I was a teen I wanted to save the world.

When I was an adult I wanted to save myself.

As I grow older

I've realized

I've saved the boy

so that he can create the world.

***

All my past fears,

having given birth to themselves,

seeking refuge without purchase,

fought and stole hearts light.

Freed from their sin,

boarded in houses

made of ill repute.

Driven from beds, shaken

into the night.

They fled

like field mice

as I soared overhead

Perched above

I watched them scatter

before the dawn.

***

How do I release the chaos of my mind, that cling like greasy plastic wrap on a hot summer day?

"I am not sure there is an answer as one has to take the deliberate action of picking it off and wiping up regardless of it's a mess or not. Sometimes licking the goo off can be fun. Sometimes fingers get burnt. Its not about if you like it or not, it's about doing. Making that choice, is it for me to do or isn't it. This mess, is it mine? Is it me? Sometimes it's better just to say, that's not my mess. it's not my problem and it's not me. Sometimes you know it's not, but you know someone needs help cleaning up. Just an experience. Just let it be that. Don't worry over it. Love it or leave it." --- My guide

***

When I close my eyes and feel energy and emotion that does not feel like me............

I sit with INTENTION and do,

I call to my loves in Spirit,

I ask with intention

for intervention.

I hold them in mind.

Imagine their being,

face, hair, skin, hands.

Hear their voice, their touch.

I see myself,

in minds eye

I see them

in minds eye.

I see us together.

I imagine our energy merge

I feel it, and allow.

All else flows,

around

through

away from me.

Together we spin,

twirl

twist

fly

fling

flow

push

pull

move energy around

me.

Cleanings light,

fire, flame,

ropes, cords

water, wind.

Spin

around

The energy in my minds eye

cocoons

wraps

spins

shell, web, shield,

disentangles

detaches

intercepts

all attachments

and

Heals.

I see this,

I feel this

I hear,

know

All that is not me

my true self

love

HEALED

and returns to Light

Gratitude

Peace

Love.

***

From my associate in the Bristol Spirit Lodge, Christine

"Next time you are hurt, try this for yourself....

Hold the hurt just long enough to find a quiet corner. Sit in the quiet and feel the pain of the hurt as it grows within you. Allow it to expand. If you need to cry then fine, do that, then sit afterwards and tune in to the hurt again and face any that is remaining. Feel the energy of the hurt. Feel the full force of energy that it contains. Tune in to it. Feel every little bit of it. Look deeply into it. As you do this you will begin to feel the force as a pure energy...it will feel no longer feel negative, it will feel to be a pure energy. When the energy is running through you as a positive force release it. It will flow from you and form a glow around you. You will have changed a negative to a positive and you will feel the benefits. "