Describe this

posted Oct 30, 2015, 8:00 AM by David Alan Binder   [ updated May 16, 2016, 6:54 AM ]

Describe this or whatever you chose:

The drain was slow this morning and the small shaved hairs swirled around, milling without real interest in where it was going.  Just meandering like it had all day and of course, I wanted to put more water in for washing my face but wanted all the particles to go down.  So I impatiently waited.

Is this the way you would describe it?

Probably not but the thing is to make it realistic and so that someone can empathize with the person patiently waiting and know that you’ve been there in a similar instance and can visualize it.

This makes stories vivid and give them realism and vitality.  They become living and breathing entities on their own but without a point they are just pretty pictures without a story arc to drive them the pictures will not hold the attention the reader.

How about this one?

Sh*t, shower and shave (my boss used to say this) and that is what I did every day but today was a different.  I had a new job interview and wanted to get there early and the drain did not cooperate. The drain had a mind of its own and was slow this morning and the small shaved hairs swirled around, milling without real interest in where it was going.  Just meandering like it had all day and of course, I wanted to put more water to rinse my face after shaving but wanted all the particles to go down.  So I impatiently waited.

The job interview puts some drive, some oomph behind the description and gives a reason for the whole paragraph.  Every sentence or at least paragraph needs drive and a reason and propels the story arc.  You started something and you are driving to an end and the pieces in-between are how you get to the end and string together the beginning and end to be meaningful and get somewhere.

Describe to me how I can help you with anything you’d like, even writing.

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<title>David Alan Binder – Write Coach Describe this or whatever you chose:

The drain was slow this morning and the small shaved hairs swirled around, milling without real interest in where it was going.  Just meandering like it had all day and of course, I wanted to put more water in for washing my face but wanted all the particles to go down.  So I impatiently waited.

Is this the way you would describe it?

Probably not but the thing is to make it realistic and so that someone can empathize with the person patiently waiting and know that you’ve been there in a similar instance and can visualize it.

This makes stories vivid and give them realism and vitality.  They become living and breathing entities on their own but without a point they are just pretty pictures without a story arc to drive them the pictures will not hold the attention the reader.

How about this one?

Sh*t, shower and shave (my boss used to say this) and that is what I did every day but today was a different.  I had a new job interview and wanted to get there early and the drain did not cooperate. The drain had a mind of its own and was slow this morning and the small shaved hairs swirled around, milling without real interest in where it was going.  Just meandering like it had all day and of course, I wanted to put more water to rinse my face after shaving but wanted all the particles to go down.  So I impatiently waited.

The job interview puts some drive, some oomph behind the description and gives a reason for the whole paragraph.  Every sentence or at least paragraph needs drive and a reason and propels the story arc.  You started something and you are driving to an end and the pieces in-between are how you get to the end and string together the beginning and end to be meaningful and get somewhere.

Describe to me how I can help you with anything you’d like, even writing.

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<meta name="description=" content="David Alan Binder (aka dalanbinder) provides a blog for Writers Describe this or whatever you chose:

The drain was slow this morning and the small shaved hairs swirled around, milling without real interest in where it was going.  Just meandering like it had all day and of course, I wanted to put more water in for washing my face but wanted all the particles to go down.  So I impatiently waited.

Is this the way you would describe it?

Probably not but the thing is to make it realistic and so that someone can empathize with the person patiently waiting and know that you’ve been there in a similar instance and can visualize it.

This makes stories vivid and give them realism and vitality.  They become living and breathing entities on their own but without a point they are just pretty pictures without a story arc to drive them the pictures will not hold the attention the reader.

How about this one?

Sh*t, shower and shave (my boss used to say this) and that is what I did every day but today was a different.  I had a new job interview and wanted to get there early and the drain did not cooperate. The drain had a mind of its own and was slow this morning and the small shaved hairs swirled around, milling without real interest in where it was going.  Just meandering like it had all day and of course, I wanted to put more water to rinse my face after shaving but wanted all the particles to go down.  So I impatiently waited.

The job interview puts some drive, some oomph behind the description and gives a reason for the whole paragraph.  Every sentence or at least paragraph needs drive and a reason and propels the story arc.  You started something and you are driving to an end and the pieces in-between are how you get to the end and string together the beginning and end to be meaningful and get somewhere.

Describe to me how I can help you with anything you’d like, even writing.

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