headlines

British Newspapers ARE FUN!

And More Actual newspaper headlines....

>GATORS TO FACE SEMINOLES WITH PETERS OUT

>The Tallahassee Bugle

>MESSIAH CLIMAXES IN CHORUS OF HALLELUJAHS

>The Anchorage Alaska Times

>GOVERNOR'S PENIS BUSY [should be "Pen Is"]

>The New Haven Connecticut Register

>THANKS TO PRESIDENT CLINTON, STAFF SGT. FRUER NOW HAS A SON

>The Arkansas Plainsman

>CLINTON PLACES DICKEY IN GORE'S HANDS

>Bangor Maine News

>STARR AGHAST AT FIRST LADY SEX POSITION

>The Washington Times

>CLINTON STIFF ON WITHDRAWAL

>The Bosnia Bugle

>LONG ISLAND STIFFENS FOR LILI'S BLOW

>Newsday

>ORGAN FESTIVAL ENDS IN SMASHING CLIMAX

>San Antonio Rose

>PETROLEUM JELLY KEEPS IDLE TOOLS RUST-FREE

>Chicago Daily News

>TEXTRON INC. MAKES OFFER TO SCREW COMPANY STOCKHOLDERS

>The Miami Herald

>MARRIED PRIESTS IN CATHOLIC CHURCH A LONG TIME COMING

>The New Haven Connecticut Register

>GOVERNOR CHILES OFFERS RARE OPPORTUNITY TO GOOSE HUNTERS

>The Tallahassee Democrat

>WOULD SHE CLIMB TO THE TOP OF MR. EVEREST AGAIN? ABSOLUTELY!

>The Houston Chronicle