Enabling

There is a criticism of the Empathy Tent Team and the approach of listening to and dialoging with everyone.

One criticism is that if we listen to the KKK or to Nazis, that we enable them and the best way to deal with them is to ignore or suppress them.

Try to get a better handle on this complaint about us enabling so called haters.

For example, Ryan Rohrer said, "My caution to you would be to check in if you are helping groups recruit and bait people to participate in violence. The empathy circle only works if both side are honest. Having seen Joey say the exact opposite in media interviews following the empathy circle, it's only helpful if it's empathy on two sides."

Empathy is enabling people who are not acting in good faith to get more of a platform.

Responses

  • Daryl Davis Story of talking with the KKK and transforming them.

  • The listening is in and of itself transforming

  • We are listening for the humanity of the other. What are the feelings behind what they are saying.

  • listening does not mean agreement.

  • Our goal is to build a culture of empathy and the means are the end. To build an empathic culture we use the means of empathy.

  • If you use ignoring, you will create a culture of ignoring, and that is what we already have, and it has disastrous results. Ignoring creates the pain of disconnection. Versus listening and empathy creates the warmth of connection.

  • if you ignore, you never know if you will be the one ignored. It becomes a tool that can be applied to you.

  • “There’s never been anybody in the history of the world who’s changed their racist views by being punched. And this may not be a popular thought – but we need to understand that they are human beings who are broken. And eventually it is impossible to reconcile the prejudice once you yourself have witnessed that the people you hate are not the monsters you have created in your head.” [Christian Picciolini is a former skinhead and co-founder of Life After Hate, an organization that rehabilitates former neo-Nazis and right-wing extremists.]

Systemic - one by one will not work

  • it becomes a class that every student takes.

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People are engaging in bad faith

People are not engaging in good faith

good faith = honesty or sincerity of intention.

Empathy and not trusting the other side to listen, dialogue in good faith.

I don't trust the other side.