People will say, "I understand." maybe they do,
maybe not. Instead of saying you understand, Demonstrate it.
What Empathy Isn't - Marshall Rosenberg Compassionate Communication
Empathy, give the full attention to someone. Give full presence.
Blocks
Intellectual understanding - get this at university -i.e. theories and ideas. This blocks connecting to the felt experience of the person in the moment.
I understand how your feel - but they really don't understand. instead demonstrate understanding.
Sympathy - Feeling sad for someone. we are talking about ourselves.
Fixing - (stimulates loneliness)
Giving Advice - (stimulates loneliness)
Reflective Listening, 1994 Neil Katz and Kevin McNulty
"Withdrawing
4. Understanding
Trying to prove to the person that you understand by telling him or her directly, rather than by listening.
I understand
I total grasp what you are saying.
I know just how your're feeling"