First Time, First Love - Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Thirteen
Once he was back at college, Nathan threw himself into his studies. As well as being on a full basketball scholarship, he had opted to take a business management course so that he would have something to fall back on should something happen to him which prevented him from playing. Therefore, every available moment was filled either with basketball or with studying in an attempt to stop himself having time to think about what had happened back home.
If only he could stop himself from dreaming though. Ever since that horrible night at the club, his dreams had been filled with images of Haley’s face after he’d said those cruel words to her. He wished he could turn back the clock and never gone to the club in the first place and he knew that if that had been the case, he could have just remembered things the way they had been with her before that. Okay, they hadn’t spoken since the night he had dropped her home after the disaster at the beach house, but at least the situation wouldn’t have been nearly as bad as it was now.
The other thing that was different about Nathan now that he was back at college was that he had stopped dating. His friends, not to mention his brother, thought he had gone mad as before he had gone home for the summer he had practically been dating a different girl each night of the week. As far as he was concerned, that was in the past and he no longer wanted the womanising reputation he seemed to be well known for around campus.
He still went out with his friends but when a pretty girl hit on him, which they still did, he politely turned them down. The first time he’d done it, he had had to bite his lip to stop himself laughing at the shocked expression on the girl’s face as she stared at him open-mouthed, obviously already having been made aware of his reputation.
Nathan often wondered how Haley was getting on at college and he’d asked Lucas about her on a couple of occasions. His brother simply replied that she was fine and appeared to be settling in well. No mention was made of whether or not she was dating anyone and he knew better than to ask that question. There was no reason to arouse his suspicions unnecessarily.
After much internal debate, Nathan had finally asked for her contact details and when pushed for a reason why, he had just said that he wanted to know how his surrogate little sister was doing in her first semester. If Lucas really knew what he thought about her, it would probably make his hair curl.
Despite now having her e-mail address and phone number, he hadn’t yet made the first move and used them. What he had said to her that night was unforgivable but he was desperate to speak to her and apologise. He had even contemplated telling her the whole truth about his feelings for her but he just didn’t know how to begin that conversation.
Lying on his bed, he reached over to his nightstand and picked up his cell phone. Flicking through the different options, he found what he was searching for and looked at the photograph he had taken of her one day when they’d gone to the cabin. He had lied and told her that he just wanted to test the camera facility when really he had just wanted to have a picture of her. Looking at her smiling image for a few moments caused a lump to form in his throat and he swallowed before closing the file and putting the phone down. He knew he had to do something big to get her to forgive him and he was determined to do whatever it took to make that happen.
* * * * *
Leaving Tree Hill and everyone behind hadn’t been easy for Haley and it was made all the more difficult by what had happened at the club between her and Nathan. All she had wanted to do was hide out in her bedroom but that hadn’t been possible. Lydia James had told her daughter that that wasn’t the way to spend her last couple of days in her hometown and she had taken her out shopping and then to lunch. In the end, Haley was pleased she had agreed to go because she’d had fun just hanging out and spending time with her mom. The new jeans and top she had received had helped make her feel better too.
There had been one moment at lunch when she had been tempted to confide in her mother about Nathan but just when she was about to say something, the dumb waiter had come over and interrupted. After that the moment had passed and she decided to keep the matter to herself.
Even though she wasn’t that far from home, she still felt homesick during her first few days at college. Luckily her roommate, Julia, was really nice and she actually reminded her a little bit of Peyton which helped make her feel more settled in her new environment. The other people she had met were equally as nice and she had been kept pretty busy attending various things with them around campus. Her classes kept her busy too which she was grateful for because by the end of the day she was exhausted and slept fitfully at night without dreaming of a certain someone.
She still thought of him and, on occasion, she would dig her old photograph of him out from under her mattress and just stare at it. Each time she did that, which wasn’t often as it was too painful, she was just reminded of his harsh words that night and her eyes would fill with tears. A part of her had hoped he would come and see her before he left for California but he hadn’t and that had hurt too. She wished she really did hate him but she didn’t and she couldn’t. There was only one thing she could do to move on and she forced herself to do it, no matter how much she hated the mere thought.
* * * * *
A few weeks later...
Haley smiled at her date as she listened to him recalling something funny that had happened to him when he was a child. She and David had gone out a couple of times before and she liked him. She really did. He was smart, funny, loved music with a passion that matched her own and he just happened to be very good looking.
But he wasn’t Nathan.
David didn’t make her knees go weak the way that Nathan did with just a look in her direction. She had actually wondered if she’d picked her fellow classmate because of his slight resemblance to Nathan. He too was over six feet tall with short dark hair and a similar build but that was where the similarity ended. David didn’t have Nathan’s gorgeous blue eyes or his trademark smirk and his arms didn’t feel the same when they held her.
Music was the main thing she and David had in common. He played piano and drums and also wrote songs. They met on their first day of classes when they attended music appreciation and had sat next to each other. He had a laid back personality and was very easy to get along with. It wasn’t long before he had asked her out on a date.
Haley hadn’t been expecting that and had turned him down. One thing about David was that he was persistent and didn’t take no for an answer. She hadn’t wanted to lead him on and that had been the reason for her declining his invitation but the more she hung out with him, the more she liked him and eventually she had changed her mind and agreed to go out with him.
Their first kiss was sweet and tender but it didn’t set her on fire the way her first kiss with Nathan had done. God, she could still remember the way her lips had tingled afterwards and how she had been able to taste him each time she’d licked her lips.
“Haley?”
David’s voice brought her out of her thoughts and she smiled at him from across the table. “Hmm?”
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, I’m fine. Why?” She asked before taking a sip of her water.
“Because it looks like you haven’t been listening to a word I’ve been saying for the past ten minutes.”
“Oh, uh, it’s just that I...”
“You don’t have to explain,” David said interrupting her. “It’s fine. I’m sure it’s just because it’s been a long day.”
Haley frowned at him. She didn’t need him making excuses for her. “No, that’s not it. I’ve just got a lot on my mind that’s all.”
He smiled at her and leaned across the table to take her hand in his. “Do you want to talk about it? I’m a good listener.”
Right, I can just imagine how happy you’d be to hear me talking about another guy while I’m on a date with you, she thought to herself. She shook her head. “It’s nothing serious but I’ll keep that in mind. Thanks.”
“Okay, cool. Are you ready to leave ‘cause I thought maybe we could take a walk before we head back to the dorms?”
The last thing Haley felt like doing right then was taking what she knew would be a romantic walk. Even though she knew it was wrong, she just wanted to go back to her room, curl up in bed and think about Nathan and what he was doing. She hated what her last words to him had been but he had hurt her so much with what he’d said to her. Deep down she couldn’t help wondering if he’d said that to cover up any jealous feelings he’d felt at seeing her with another guy in that club.
“Haleeeey,” David sing-songed as he tried to get her attention back.
She realised that she’d spaced out on him again and smiled apologetically. “Um, that sounds nice but could we take a rain-check? It’s getting late and I’m feeling a bit tired so...” she trailed off.
David’s disappointment was written all over his face and he didn’t try to hide it. “Seriously, is everything okay because you never feel like doing anything with me? We’ve been seeing each other a while now and—”
“David, we’ve been on three dates and that’s all. I’ve just started college and I’m just getting used to living away from home and all my friends. It would be nice to be given a chance to—”
“To what? We’re all in the same situation here so you’re not alone in feeling like that.” He squeezed her hand before continuing in a slightly quieter voice. “It’s just that whenever I kiss you it’s like you’re a million miles away or that you’re thinking about something or someone else.”
Haley couldn’t help flushing with embarrassment at hearing his words and she knew that she’d given the game away. It was true. The few times he’d kissed her she found herself thinking of Nathan; comparing the kisses they’d shared to the ones she was experiencing with David.
“Ahh, so that’s it. I thought you said you didn’t have a boyfriend back home?”
“I don’t. It’s just... it’s complicated,” she eventually said.
“I really like you, Haley, and I thought you really liked me too so...”
“I do like you. You’re one of the nicest guys I’ve met. It’s just that...” she lowered her eyes and concentrated on the pattern on the tablecloth. “You’re not him.”
David watched her and for the first time he saw just how sad she looked. It was strange that he’d never really noticed before. He suddenly realised that her smile never quite reached her eyes. Taking a deep breath, he said, “Do you want to talk about it? It might help to speak to someone who isn’t involved.”
Raising her eyes back to his, she gave him a soft smile before shaking her head. “Thanks for the offer but I can’t. He’s the one I need to speak to but right now I can’t. He’s also away at college and this isn’t something I can do over the phone or in an e-mail. It needs to be face to face.”
“When will you be seeing him next?” he asked curiously.
“Probably at Christmas. His brother told me that he can’t make it home for Thanksgiving so it’ll have to be Christmas. I just hope it can wait,” she whispered the last part to herself.
Seeing her eyes fill with tears, David gave her hand another gentle squeeze. “C’mon, let’s get out of here. I’ll buy you an ice cream on the way home. I hear it helps cure all ailments,” he teased and was happy to see her smile back.
“Yeah, it does.”
A short while later, David walked her back to her dorm and he turned to face her when they reached the front door.
“I’m so sorry about this, but I really thought dating you would help me get over him. I didn’t mean to use you and...”
“Hey, it’s okay. I’ve really enjoyed hanging out with you, Haley, and I hope we can stay friends.”
“Definitely,” she told him hugging him tightly. “Thanks for being so understanding.”
“Well, I’m an understanding guy,” he said giving her a wink after they’d drawn back from each other.
She laughed. “Yeah, you are. So, I guess I’ll see you in class tomorrow?”
“Yeah, you will. Try and get some sleep.”
“Okay. Goodnight.” Haley watched him walk away and as she made her way up to her room, she felt the weight on her shoulders slowly starting to decrease.