Scene 9.07 - The Wacky Shack
ANIMATION STYLE 1
EST: INT. Maroon Room - Night.
(It appears to be a carnival. WELLS and ROMEO are walking along the Midway while NANCY eats cotton candy and COMMODORE ZALE carries a stuffed rabbit plush toy. RONNIE and CAMEO EIGHT walk behind them, all heading toward the Haunted Ship Roanoke Ride - Ref: The Whacky Shack, Joyland Amusement Park, Wichita, Kansas/Waldameer Park, Erie, Pennsylvania.)
ROMEO
(Passes joint:) While I commend you, Doctor, for providing this haven for wayward souls, eventually this party will end, you know.
WELLS
Buzzkill. You just don't see it, do you?
ROMEO
No, I am afraid I do not. I'm always working.
WELLS
It's about having fun; feeling in control. When a human mind isn't dead, it is active. Very active. On thousands of different levels.
ROMEO
That part I can understand. Your latent dreams are curious. Willful, even.
WELLS
I dream this not just because I can; but because it is needed. Diversion is needed by everyone. Most of all, it is needed by me.
ROMEO
While I am sure everyone is aware this cannot possibly hurt, I don't see how this helps, or how it is truly necessary.
WELLS
People need to have fun most of the time. If these people weren't here, they'd be making a mess of things. Unlimited imagination unfettered by physical laws is something a person can grow accustomed to -- if I didn't have this carny in place, I'd go crazy.
ROMEO
You're there. It's wonderful. The detail is quite vivid. Everything has shadows, taste, smell -- this insanity is quite impressive.
WELLS
As a man well-versed in Psychiatry, I am quite aware it's borderline dementia. This dementia, rationalized, has proven to be quite fun, and luckily, it is mostly harmless.
ROMEO
It's the "mostly" harmless I am concerned about. Their own state of mind is in question here.
WELLS
I'm keeping them all here and fully distracted until everyone can get back to where they belong. I figger I got at least four separate entities swirling around in my head all claiming to be me, and I know their brains would go mad if I let them conjure-up every nightmare we had as a child. I ain't Sybil.
ROMEO
Yet you seem to have The Three Faces Of Eve over there.
WELLS
Touche'.
ROMEO
You can't cure them of it; it's a manifest symptom of Anthromysis Genoplexia -- there's no known remedy.
WELLS
I'm well aware of that; I'm doing my best, though.
ROMEO
Better off by beginning anew. Perhaps you should destroy this fantasy.
WELLS
I choose to contain everyone within a safe environment. I do it here and amuse them with fun and games -- and rules made to be broken. You're a machine, you can't possibly understand. They're my friends; it's fun.
ROMEO
It's all fun and games until someone gets hurt.
WELLS
True that! You're keen, Ro. For a robot, you sure got some insight...
(They walk up to the empty, line-free ride. They all meander through the chained maze and approach an over-sized, secondary-color cut-out with a cartoon of a blacklight zombie ghost holding out his skin-peeling hand. The accompanying text reads: You Must Be This Tall To Ride" -- the size of the sign nearly dwarfs the group.)
ROMEO
Eh? What's this sign about?
WELLS
Most of this fabricated world is based from my memories as a child. The signs were bigger to me then, so everything's still in scale to how I remember them. You wanna blaze one before the ride? It's way better to do high. (Produces an anemic pinner of resin-scrapings and small, roach-paper flakes, tightly twisted.) I appreciate you sharing your schwag earlier (Sparks it.) but I'm afraid I can't repay you in kind. This is what I'd been saving for our Friday "potluck." (Passes.) It has a few Angorian flakes in it; it should smoke okay, tho.
ROMEO
(Looks at his own roach of joint and remembers the odd human peculiarity of tolerance. With THC, chronic daily-toking human users can go without for a day and feel their tolerance for the drug drop to levels that closely resemble the levels of most high school freshmen -- and upon reuniting with their favorite girl named Mary, hardcore stoners seem to re-experience a first-time potency of the drug; which gets them giggling like children and talking non-stop in a thousand directions all while wondering if everything is cool or not. One joint later, their tolerance returns, and they're back to calling it "schwag." Typical. ROMEO produces a blue, furry, three-cherry, crystal-knobbed, honey-resin coated grandaddy blunt of fine Angorian hemp-leaf hybrids.) Perhaps we could all share this.
WELLS
Now ya talkin' man! Let her spark!
(WELLS and ROMEO immediately join the group outside the entrance of the ride. Little cars on tracks, each a different sparkly color, await the small group. Others can be heard screaming on other rides across the maroon-clouded, misty expanse. People seem to be focused on the blunt.)
WELLS (Cont'd)
You alone can talk to me about being insane -- they can't think it, or they'd think about why I'm crazy and then they'd all lose it themselves. Still, I can't make myself admit it, no matter what I do or think, and that is curable. I'm in control. As far as my dreams, sure, there's a few dark corners, but if I let all these lost spirits cavort somewhere else, they'd never come back sane and everyone would end up even crazier than I am.
ROMEO
I'll agree that this safeguard is novel, but it can't work forever. Eventually, someone will happen upon us here.
WELLS
Only three entities know of this place: Verne, Clarke and... your metamorphosis.
ROMEO
I can't find Verne, Clarke's mostly here, and yes... the metamorphosis. I'm still me; you're quite safe.
WELLS
No, we're not safe. This isn't reality. Reality is that you machines evolve to enslave the Universe and you put us all in a toy box forever.
ROMEO
No, that's only one perspective of an aspect of reality. Remember I am endowed with a noble purpose. (Pause.) True, it can be corrupted. I'm relying on you to prevent that.
WELLS
Yeah. You're here, aren't you? So far, so good. I said I would help you, yet I'm afraid my knowledge on the psyche of a robot is limited. I'm a doctor, not a grease jockey.
ZALE
(Toking:) This is killer!
CLARKE
Quite.
WELLS
Let's talk about this "true reality" stuff some other time, Romeo.
ROMEO
Yes, I look forward to talking with you more on the subject, Doctor.
RONNIE
So what's this ride all about, Doc?
ZALE
Oh, it's so cool! Ride with me, Ronnie! There's lots of dark, make-out tunnels.
RONNIE
I ain't going anywhere until I've had a hit o' that...
CAMEO EIGHT
Me neither.
WELLS
(Holding NANCY.) You can ride with us, Bunion.
ROMEO
You're not going to leave me alone on this, are you?
WELLS
Nah, nah. I know this ride too well. So does she. (NANCY smiles and nods, melding against WELLS.) You all can sit up front.
CAMEO EIGHT
If y'all sitting behind me, doncha be tryin' to scare me or nothin' cuz if y'all tap my head or grab me, I swear to God I'll turn white.
(Chuckles.)
WELLS
Nah, we'll be keeping our hands to ourselves, Bunion. Although it would be interesting to see you turn white.
FX: MAKE UP -- IF CAMEO EIGHT WERE A GINGER, GREEN-EYED CAUCASIAN
JUMP CUT
CAMEO EIGHT
(Turns white.) Like this?
ZALE
Hey, that's really neat!!! How did you do that? I could- Howdja do that!?!
MS: CAMEO EIGHT BECOMES ASIAN, THEN NATIVE AMERICAN
CAMEO EIGHT
I'm kinda like one o' ya'll your squids, I can talk with color -- we call it speaking Melaninese -- but it's more like wearing a mood ring all over -- it's more like your home-planet's Chamaeleonidae -- (Within a nanosecond, empathically reads and identifies an overall lack of comprehension from the group, offers a more-specific word:) Furcifer (More confusion, tries a more familiar word:) chamaeleons (Bingo.) -- I can be whatever color I want to be. (Back to former state.) Like my pappy, I choose to be black, 'cause black is beautiful.
ZALE
That's so cool! Oh, I wish I could become a different color!
CAMEO EIGHT
(Green-Turquoise:) I can be any color I think of.
WELLS
That is nifty, Bunion. Sure would have helped our race a few thousand years along if we ourselves would have-
CAMEO EIGHT
Nah- Uh-uh, it doesn't work that way. The solution follows the action. We evolved the ability after all our minds transcended bigotry and judgement by appearances. Any texture or color we can imagine. It's within every living being's path, but you gotta crawl to it.
RONNIE
I'd be red and yellow, with spikes. Like a porcupine.
BUNION
(Demonstrates as a yellow-and-red, humanoid porcupine.) Quills.
RONNIE
Yeah! That's it!
WELLS
True blue for me. I'd prefer horns. Like a ram's.
NANCY
(Turns silver.) I'm really silver anyway. (Pets herself.) I sometimes have a tail cuz I like it.
WELLS
That you do - and I like it, too. (Turns:) How about you, Romeo? Can you change color?
ROMEO
No. (Beat.) I look like my programmer made me to look. I'm as white-bread as they come.
ZALE
(Steps back and leans on a deep-lavendar-light-grape-lighter-eggplant-Easter-egg-and-shiny-pastel-glitter-speckled-and-poly-urethane-coated-fiberglass ride-car, as Ronnie passes the three-cherried blunt. The group unconsciously takes a step toward ZALE, keeping the huddle at reach length to the burning trinity.) Well if you could change your skin color, Romeo, what color would it be?
ROMEO
(Internally intrigued that the Commodore has a curiosity about his preferences. It's the beginning of a platonic, mutual infatuation that continues long beyond the scope of this book. Romeo takes a giant leap toward becoming more human.) Who loves an idea? It's not a question I think can be answered. I really don't have a preference. Yet, I think I like the color pink! Which, I suppose is... the color I am already. Why are you asking me? What color would you choose, Commodore?
CU: ZALE
ZALE
(Tokes, smiles. Considers her Blue-green attire with yellow accents.) That's easy. I'd be-
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