Scene 5.10 - Shenanigans
EST: EXT. Temple - Day.
ECU: Chin’s open mouth
ZOOM OUT
(CHIN belches loudly for a long time, just when you thought it was over, it continues. DING farts, loudly. All the men around the alter put their thumbs to their forehead. Long, the most drunk, is the last to do so. Side bar: They’re all completely hammered. Nonetheless, they play it off pretty cool. They’ve been this drunk together before, except now they can actually understand what is being said by everyone without having to pantomime.)
HUNG
Long ate it. I gotta find a tree.
LONG
Yeah, yeah, whose shot?
DING
Mine. (He barely misses --the quarter bounces off the lip of the cup.) Rims! (He endures a second miss.) Chance. (He makes it, hiccups, looks about.) Goose, goose, goose - Duc!
GET CLOSE
DUC
You said my name. Drink.
LONG
You said drink. Imbibe.
DUC
So did you!
LONG
It doesn't count when I'm calling you out.
DUC
If you're not gonna drink for saying drink, then I'm not going to drink for saying drink.
HUNG
(Off:) You both said the D word, you both gotta swallow!
CHIN
You left the table without finishing your cup. You gotta finish the brew off and then down another to get back in.
DING
Duc’s gotta drink first. I made it.
CHIN
Then you swallow twice, cause you said his name and the D word a whole butt-load of times.
DUC
At least three times, he already said my name. Is 'butt-load' profanity?
(HUNG returns.)
LONG
No, it isn't, Butt-breath. (Pause. To HUNG:) Hey... sensuous.
HUNG
Excuse me?
LONG
(Offers cup:) Sensuous up, how 'bout getting me another beer?
(HUNG takes LONG’S cup, rolls eyes and goes to fountain.)
DUC
Who’s got the towel? I wanna challenge.
(Gets second quarter.)
DING
No noses, you big-beak freak!
DUC
There. No noses. Swish. That’s at least four for you, man.
DING
Double-mega-power-challenge. (Produces fifty-cent piece. Oooohs and cautious looks abound. Pause.) How many does everybody else got, Mr. Know-It-All?
DUC
It don’t matter, there is no double-mega-power-challenge rule yet. Either down ‘em or (Lets his fingers do the walking.) take a walk, lightweight.
(Stands, kicking over a make-shift chair. A showdown? Wobbles, steadies self on marble altar. Points to DUC.)
DING
I only got one thing (Points index finger upward.) to say to you-
(Points it at DUC.)
DUC
Five and counting. You’re pointing.
DING
I beat you playing beer-hunter.
DUC
That was a year ago and you cheated. You shook up all the beers.
DING
They got shook-up on the way back from the market-
DUC
(Abrupt:) Sure they did.
DING
(Points at DUC, drops the fifty-cent piece, it bounces across the table into DUC'S waiting palm at the edge of the altar.) I just got one thing to say to you, Mr. Duc Yu--
DUC
You’ve already said one thing -- and my name -- I’m counting seven, and if you say what I think you’re gonna say I’m gonna count that as three more...
ECU: DING leans in, so does DUC
DING
(Pause.) Cannonball!
(Puts hands on DUC'S ears, pulls-him-in and smooches him on the lips -- SMACK! PUH! -- runs-off quickly and cannon-balls into the pool. DUC, peeved, wipes his lips, gives chase, pitches the coin and dives into pool. Horse-play ensues. Mostly splashing. A little playful dunking -- no holding-under.)
CU: ROLLING COIN
FX: SLOW MOTION
ECU: COIN ROLLING INTO THE POOL
PEDESTAL DOWN: FOLLOW COIN TO BOTTOM OF POOL WHERE IT PERFECTLY COVERS THE STAIN
FOCUS:HORSE-PLAY IN DISTANCE
CUT TO:
(Others jumping into pool to get into the action, eventually everyone’s in.)
HUNG
(Closes his eyes.) Marco!
ALL
Polo!
HUNG
Marco!
ALL
(They dive under.) Polo!
CUT TO: UNDERWATER
(The coin rests at the bottom of the middle of the pool. As all heads go under and the men swim underwater playfully, the pool darkens. They swim upward.)
CUT TO: