Scene 5.14 - A Sable Cape
EST: EXT. Palace Spire - Morning
(BUD steps onto the balcony, wearing an ornate, silk robe, HE stretches mightily, the soreness in HIS back a small price from the incredible rest HE had the previous evening. HE touches the tender parts of HIS back, grimaces, takes a breath and smiles, raising HIS fists to the air, feeling invincible. HE scans HIS eyes across the countryside and notices several large tracts of land with curious horticultural products. Squints. MARY enters.)
MARY
Did you enjoy yourself last night?
BUD
Immensely. Why did you leave just when things were getting good?
MARY
Good for you perhaps. (Lightly hits HIS tummy with the back of HER hand.) I told you, silly, I’m a good girl. If the Empress wants to sleep with you, that's her business.
BUD
It wasn't like that at all. Really. Still, it was quite a good time.
MARY
I can only imagine. They're all still in there, sound asleep and smiling. I wonder why.
BUD
What are you doing up so early?
MARY
Hmmmph. I've been up for hours. I have a kingdom to defend. I had to dispatch spies, mobilize troops and answer a hundred questions. And who was around to answer mine?
BUD
What kind of questions do you have, Mary Jane?
MARY
The big kind. How do I know that what I do is what the Goddess wants me to do? How do I know that what I don't do is what the Goddess doesn't want me to do? I'm lucky to have Carmella to help me sort out those kinds of questions.
BUD
Carmella?
MARY
My childhood friend. Home-girl. She sees visions. I bet she knows what you did last night.
BUD
Impressive. (Pause. Defensive:) Foot massages and dirty jokes, she tell you that?
MARY
No. You didn't really come up in the conversation. Last night, after a strange dream, she told me to do a most curious thing.
BUD
What's that?
MARY
(Obviously, SHE'S had HER morning coffee:) She told me to anonymously send the Banished Witches of the Seven Winds seven pieces of our finest parchment and to accept nothing in return, imagine that! That is strange enough, but she also told me to give the Witch of the North Wind, Aurora, a map from the outside World into the Desert Labyrinth, which is really odd, because what good is a map that shows you an entrance, but no exit? I mean, the map out of the Desert Labyrinth is the one that you really need, right? (He is about to agree, but she cuts him off.) I mean, if you ain't got that, you'd be in a whole world of hurt, cuz, without it, well, you’re lost for- well, centuries, I guess, I mean the way in is to the False Valley and you're already wrong before you climb to find where you left... and even if it's marked, the Yeti just copy those markings for jest to make people wander more and it doesn't make any sense to me at all, cuz, the Witches of the Seven Winds ride dragons, so they don’t require any land maps, I mean, unless they're going in a cave or something, and the Desert Labyrinth isn't a cave at all, it’s just thousands and thousands of winding trails leading to miles of aimless wandering in the mountains with only one way out -- hidden at the end of a steep slope between two symmetrical mountains called the Dragon’s Throat, which seems way easy when going into the maze; you see the end right across from you in what just appears to be a valley of small foothills with little mountain chain turds winding about. Why, that's why it's called the Dragon's Intestine -- although you didn't hear me say that -- and even if I wanted a map of the Painter's Pass region, I’d trade with the Yeti, because they know all those passes and secret caves better than we do, so why go talk to a witch, then? How odd! And this was all after an equally-strange dream. I dreamt that I was filling seven vials with the blood of seven different serpents and then I made seven brushes from seven-hundred, seventy-seven hairs of a strange creature that was called a say-bell, of all things.
BUD
A sable? Sables are native to Northern Asia. Good luck. They're not sold around here. Not even at the marketplace. Ol’ Mr. Mee-rip-yoo-off would give all of his fake-gold teeth to have a sable.
MARY
(Pulls-out long cigarette from behind her ear, formerly locked in by the shades.) When I awoke, I was covered with a large blanket of the softest fur I have ever felt.
BUD
(Disbelieving:) Lemme guess, you woke up with a sable blanket, huh? Naturally. So, did you make the brushes?
MARY
(She smiles.) Why, of course.
(Flips cigarette into her mouth expertly as she reaches behind her right side and begins to turn left.)
FX: Slow motion, fantastic
(Spins completely around, counter-clockwise on left foot, heel aloft, to light the cigarette. Her new, sable cape catches the wind and it flies outward, rippling once. She pulls the lamp in the alcove from the wall, the end of the cape whips outward as the second ripple, with a little twist from her rotation, radiates from her shoulder. The cape expands like a sail as it catches the wind directly as she moves the lamp to the end of her cigarette inside the cape, and lights the cigarette, exhales and hits the long cigarette again. The third ripple comes faster than the previous two. She puts the lamp back in its proper place as the sable cape touches her right, extended arm. The third ripple is absorbed by contact with her arm and follows to her wrist, but not whipping as before. Turning her wrist from the lamp, she grabs the interior metal ring in the corner of her cape with two fingers. Seven short, leather whips are briefly seen attached to the ring.)
POV: BUD
(She is halfway turned away, as her beautiful, smiling face with a lit cigarette in her mouth is completing the turn and a large, billowing, sable cape is flying across-)
CUT TO:
ECU: BUD GETTING SMACKED
(BUD gets smacked by the end of her cape as she completes her 360-degree turn. It makes him spin clockwise on his right foot and he is stopped halfway by the balcony rail. He leans over the rail. We get to see a panorama of the Empire. Call this Panorama Shot A, because Panorama Shot B is from the vantage point at the top center of the first frame of Panorama Shot A. Incidentally, Panorama Shot B is the background for the end credits.)
LOSE FX
BUD
(Puts his hand to his jaw and adjusts it.) Are those fields what I think they are?
MARY
(Joining him on the rail, unaware he just got smacked.) Poppies.
BUD
And those?
MARY
(She offers a large, lit, hand-rolled cigarette.) Yep. Wake and bake?
BUD
Is a bear in the woods a Catholic?
MARY
What's a Cath-lick?
BUD
Never mind.
(Takes it. Hits it. Passes it.)
MARY
See that small trail of smoke on that peak over there?
BUD
Isn't that where we came from?
MARY
Yes. (Hits it.) Your friends must have started a fire last night. (Passes it to BUD, who hits it.) If the DEA have also seen it, they will investigate.
BUD
(Hits it, passes it.) What should we do?
MARY
Trust in the Goddess, what else? (Hits it, hits it again, passes it.) I must go, I have other duties.
BUD
I'd like to stay with you.
(KIM enters, stretching and yawning melodramatically.)
MARY
My liege.
(MARY bows.)
KIM
Mmmmm. (BUD hits cigarette as KIM approaches and touches MARY'S shoulder, liking the feel of her new cape.) Good morning, General Jane. (She turns.) Mmmmm, and good morning to you, champ. (Looks back at MARY while she lightly kisses BUD, he exhales. MARY remains stoic.) Mmmmm. Puff, puff, pass...
BUD
Morning. (Passes it to KIM, who totally hits it like a pro. [Professional, that is.]) I was thinking of seeing the troops with Mary this morning.
KIM
(Bogarts it.) Oh, in time, you will see everyone. You will not go just yet. (Hits it again.) You must help Us prepare to receive your friends. (Hits it.) The Goddess spoke to Us in a dream last night. She's already taken care of everything. (Hits it and sniffs the lit end, smiles. Holding it in, says:) Mmmmm.
(KIM smiles and exhales.)
BUD
What? My friends are here?
KIM
Why yes, see those tracks? (Points and takes small hit to compliment the one she's holding in, MARY mentally kicks herself for not noticing the tracks while looking that way only thirty seconds before.) They lead from that mountain peak to the tree line below. We are sure it's them. (Exhales.) That means they should be approaching the palace gates any moment now. (Turns, hits it.) Mary will greet them and We shall receive them in Our throne room after breakfast. Come, Bud, help Us get dressed. Mary, go meet these strangers at the gate and see that they are given clothes to wear, for in Our dream they were... (Smiles.) well, nearly naked.
(KIM takes a major hit, passes the small roach to MARY.)
MARY
(Restrained:) As you wish, my liege.
(Noting that it's now a roach, hits it, puts it out on her tongue and eats it, does the opposite of a smirk.)
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