Part 1



It was a difficult visit. I was confronted with situations of which I could not understand the relevance. I heard what was said but there were too much unfamiliars attached to it. Or, perhaps, it was unwillingness on my part to learn new things that left me with the uneasy-making impressions.

First, I was by myself. I sat on my by now familiar place, the crystal-like rock, wondering if I should go somewhere. I am used to being alone without feeling lonely. It can be peaceful.

I mused that probably all the worlds I had seen here until now were all within reach, in the same space, albeit on different frequencies; if I wanted to, I could go to any of them.

There was calmness within and around me. I felt at ease. My thoughts just floated along.

But then something happened in my field of vision. Unpleasant things: dark clouds at the horizon, the crust of the earth moving at places and sticking up. The colors in the sky were nice enough, but they moved frantically. Fortunately, it all happened at a safe distance.

The voice of Wisdom said, "You are the creator of your own world. What you see is a projection on a cosmic scale of what happens in your mind."

I only half-listened to him because in my mind I anticipated more changes in the scenery. And indeed, I saw the earth before me just falling away. In its place came an endless body of water, calm and beautifully peaceful.

"Is this real?" I cried. "If I create this myself, or even if I project it, how do I do it?"

Wisdom, who now was physically there, calmly said, "Seeing what you see now and what you observed during the other visits makes use of your ability to transform what you actually see but cannot register into 'see-able' images. The full reality is still unimaginable for you. Even on this your spiritual level. You still must rely on what your earthly brain can process. Yet you can observe all this without the earthly impediments of fear, falsities and conditioning. So, in that sense, you do indeed observe correctly the nature of the Positive State."

I reacted with, "When I use my perception or projection tools, does it mean that when I want to change what I observe, like this ocean here, it actually changes? Is it only there because I make it real in the first place?"

The thought struck me whether Achmed and his family truly exist or only appear for me? If I am in another frame of mind, or, say, after I have died, will they still exist?

He pointed out that at this juncture in my life my spirit realm is still attached to my earthly constitution in spite of that I found free access to it. "Simply said, you do not live here, yet. Therefore, tools like projecting, the power to create and observing what goes on here are all subject to your earthly limitations, also in the way you interpret it. You are a person of the sixth and, therefore, of the manipulated human generation."

(It flashed on me that the eighteenth century's Emanuel Swedenborg (see 'Epilogue'), reporting about the spiritual world he could visit, mentioned three different types of 'heavens'. Perhaps I am here only in the most 'outer' one.)

I was glad Wisdom did not comment on this, because I read only a little of E.S.'s writings. But he did say that, indeed, there was more to what I saw and created than what I now perceived.

He asked me how I felt about what I had seen until now.

I said that, in general, I felt overwhelmed by everything being so awesomely positive and beautiful.

"Well," he said, "that will not change".

He added, "You may ask yourself what you would like to be once you live here."

At this point, he suggested that he leave.

I pondered his suggestion. (On one hand I felt drawn to the musicians; just being part of being a beautiful sound! It gives me goose bumps. But then, was I avoiding being sociable? Being alone, even if I am rather comfortable with it, has something self-serving in it. Or was this my conditioned conscience speaking?)

Suddenly, I saw I was surrounded by a sizable group of men in white dresses. They formed a circle around me. One said that they would be honored if they could learn from me, from my experiences.

I wanted to protest, but then I remembered that I had been in this kind of situation before, many years ago, at the beginning of my spiritual awakening. Whether I think it's important or not, it may be of help to others getting some firsthand information about my life, the good and bad.

Someone in the group explained that they were in the business of data gathering; that they represented another segment of the human society. They dealt with what I would call science, though not as it is practiced on earth. There, human intelligence tries to uncover the facts of life. Here, he said, life is an open book, readable for everyone. Their task was to record the complexities of existence in lucid and balanced ways. I came into their picture because of my firsthand knowledge of both the Negative and the Positive State.

I realized how remarkable it was that I could help them without having to be embarrassed, as I would have been in the past because of my shortcomings and mediocrity. Actually, my typical negative aspects may be of particular interest to them.

Yet my doubt acted up.

I asked them, "There are trillions of human individuals on earth, all with their specific life stories. How can all those stories get filed, and then, what are you doing with the information?"

One of them said, "Are you sure you don't know the answer to that? Think of a nice wide beach, billions of grains of sand, yet one beautiful beach. All occurrences of every presence in life form the beautiful totality of being. They are the pride of I AM. We categorize what happens in this human-focused cycle of time so nothing gets overlooked or forgotten."

Another in the group said, "We specifically rubricate the phenomena in the Negative State. That state is coming to a close, as we guess you figure. We make sure that no detail related to it gets lost. As far as your doubt about the feasibility is concerned, you know how lately processing and storing information is done on earth. That technique is light-years behind our know-how yet it can give you some inkling of how we do it."

A strange thing was that when one of them spoke, it seemed as if several did. It was confusing for me. I didn't know on which one to focus.

I asked them to, please, let only one be their spokesman.

One facing me promptly said, "I will." But then one behind me said, "Me, too!" And on my right and left several said the same. It was comical and we all laughed.

Fortunately, it broke the ice and I started to feel more relaxed with them.

(I wondered why I should spend my relatively short time here with them questioning me. It would not be in line with the purpose of my coming here, which was to observe the goings on in this realm.)

They said not to worry. I did not have to be with them physically for my story to be documented.

I told them that that sounded better.

Suddenly, I had a flash - I guess it is called an- 'out of the body' experience. I saw the group standing in a circle in the shade of an enormous rock formation with me in the middle. Quickly I moved away from them to a height from where I could hardly see them anymore. I told myself that this went too fast and too far. Instantly, I was back with my body. (Writing this down, I chuckle. Here I was, on my spiritual plane, far away from my walking physical body and my dog, and I could even leave that spiritual self! How many more layers are there to us? Looks like a Russian doll.)

I told the men what I experienced. They smiled and said that, evidently, I had in me the potential of being in different spots at the same time but that I still had to learn the technique that comes with utilizing it. Every human being can master it, once they are here and are interested.

This brought us to talking about my lack of understanding technical things in general.

They invited me to come to a place where data-processing takes place. They warned me that compared with mine, their power of mind is formidable, beyond my comprehension. Yet, they said, the mind is not something abstract. Matter, material, currents, pulsations, frequencies, etcetera, are involved in its workings. Instruments, equipment, machinery, tracking systems and what have you play a role. Be it that those are not in separated places, as I already had learned. They reminded me of the way I could relate to the rocks.

They were nice enough to speak in layman's terms but still most of their explanations went over my head.

We entered a large room that looked like a crossing of a laboratory and a library. Hundreds of thin panels hung from the ceiling, symmetrically, some almost as wide as the whole room. I did not see drawers, but on 'counter-tops' were silver and glass looking instruments. Very delicate. Nothing massive.

I told them to not start explaining their workings to me.

They didn't, but said that they wanted to show that in the real reality nothing is 'just' there, by magic, like a 'jack in the box' popping up. It is not how I AM is. All His/Her emanations are 'concrete', real, existing as a presence, even if I would call it 'immaterial'. They asked if I understood that.

I do, sort of. (Well, how could I not? I must say that the rapidly enlarging global communication tool box with websites and internet make all this here somewhat less alien.)

It hit me that there were no women in this group. I asked about it.

They said that for specific reasons sometimes research was done by only one gender group.

"So that love doesn't interfere?" I ventured.

They laughed and pointed to where I thought was a wall. That side now opened up to another huge room, much lighter and full of almost invisible cords, threads and not-definable forms. And lo and behold, only women were busy there.

Interestingly, there seemed to occur an instant, almost palpable intelligence exchange between the two groups. I could see it in the way they looked at each other and in the gestures they made. No words were spoken, and it happened not just on an intellectual level. There also was an exchange of warmth. It made for a, even by me, 'feel-able' love atmosphere. I was very, very, impressed.

They commented on it and said it could give me some idea of how the data they gathered about occurrences of the human race are all radiating the happy message of having functioned in the great love act I AM is.

Their eyes seemed to pierce me when they said, "Full understanding of the story of the Negative State signals its end."