We Need to Adopt New Values for Men

From a young age, society teaches boys to bottle their emotions and hide how they really feel. Along with that, they are constantly bombarded with images of strong and muscular men, being trained to believe that they have to look like them in order to be seen as attractive. This is detrimental to the mental health of boys and men. We need to adopt new values for males, ones that will encourage a healthier lifestyle.

Mental Health

For years, there has been a stigma surrounding mental health issues in our society. And while it's true that there have been huge strides in clearing this stigma, it has become alarmingly clear that men's mental health is not taken as seriously as it should be. Men still feel weak when they are struggling. They still hesitate to ask for help when they need it. According to Mental Health America, 6 million men struggle with depression every year. Along with that, depression and suicide are listed within the leading causes of death among men by the CDC.

Boys must learn that it is okay to be vulnerable, and we have to understand when to get help. In a poll conducted by Today.com, 49% of the men surveyed reported being more depressed than they are comfortable to admit. If nearly half of the male population feels that they can't open up about their problems, something has to be done. It needs to become normal for men to open up about their struggles and get help.

I have experienced these issues firsthand. It always felt as though I had to ‘man-up’ rather than speaking to a therapist or somebody I can trust. Opening up to friends was tough, too, because I believed it made me seem weak to be vulnerable.

Instead of placing so much pressure on men to keep their emotions inside, we should encourage them to open up. We should begin to value being in touch with our emotions, rather than hiding them completely. It must be seen as strong to speak out when you're struggling, that way more young men won't have to deal with their issues in silence.

Body Image

The male beauty standard is unrealistic and unhealthy. The pressure to look like bodybuilders and pro athletes causes many issues for young men. The National Library of Medicine found that 22% of young men (ages 18-24) reported suffering from a muscle related eating disorder. The “gym bro” mentality is often an eating disorder (known as muscle dysmorphia) in disguise.

Youth sports may also be causing eating disorders without even realizing it. Many youth male wrestlers have reported suffering from bulimia and other eating disorders related to weight classes. These completely accepted and normal parts of our society are causing big problems for people who are affected by them.

I always wanted to be skinnier or more muscular. There was always a feeling that I wasn't attractive to girls, or that they wouldn't be interested in me because of the way my body looked. Fortunately, I have worked hard to be more comfortable with myself. But still, I know many guys who feel the same way I did, that they are not going to be valued because they do not look like the ideal version of a man. This feeling of being unworthy takes a toll on the mind, which is why it is imperative that we place less emphasis on attaining one physique, and instead focus on teaching our young men to be confident in who they are and how they look.

Instead of chasing a body standard that many cannot achieve, men should be valued for having confidence in themselves and the way they look. There is nothing wrong with working out to better yourself, but chasing an unattainable physique is detrimental to your mental and physical health. Men should not have to spend their lives trying to acquire an unhealthy physique just so they can feel confident.

As someone who has personally dealt with these issues, I do believe that changing what we collectively value will positively affect the wellbeing of men all around the world. If we can begin to teach young boys the importance of being open about their emotions and show them that they can be confident in themselves no matter how they look, we can build a world where there will be a lot less young men who have to struggle with depression and body image issues.