#127: Light

Luan Nian drove to pick up the two drunk women.

On the way to Sun Yu’s house, the two of them were slurring their words incoherently in the car, yet somehow they seemed to understand each other.

It was strange.

Such lightweights—they really couldn’t hold their liquor.

With a stern expression, Luan Nian escorted Sun Yu upstairs. Later, she had bought an apartment near the Third Ring Road, where she lived alone. Luan Nian pressed her finger onto the fingerprint lock, helped her into bed, poured a glass of water, and then called Lumi: “Your good friend Sun Yu is drunk.”

Lumi cursed under her breath. Luan Nian heard the rustling sound of her putting on her down jacket and hung up.

Lumi arrived twenty minutes later. By then, Shang Zhitao was pressing her face against the car window, feeling too hot from the alcohol.

Lumi opened the car door and took a look at her, clicking her tongue: “Pathetic.” She glanced at Luan Nian’s dark expression and thought to herself that tonight would be entertaining for Shang Zhitao. Then she turned and ran upstairs.

Luan Nian drove Shang Zhitao home. She was restless in the passenger seat. Losing his patience, Luan Nian reached out and pinned her to the seat with one hand: “If you keep acting up, I’ll throw you out!”

Shang Zhitao froze, then suddenly burst into tears: “You’re so mean! Why are you being so harsh? Can’t you speak nicely?”

…

Damn it.

“Stop crying.” After a while, Luan Nian’s tone softened: “Is it because you were acting up that I got mad?” He tried reasoning with someone who was drunk, but drunk people don’t listen to reason.

“No! You just don’t know how to talk nicely!”

Shang Zhitao sobbed uncontrollably, tears and snot streaming down her face, all the way to Luan Nian’s house.

Luan Nian never imagined he’d have to coax a drunk person out of the car like this in his lifetime. Shang Zhitao sat in the car crying, while Luan Nian stood outside the car door, bending down to lift her: “Don’t. Why are you holding me? We’re not close.”

“Can’t I walk by myself? Why do you have to carry me?”

“You need to apologize to me.”

“Apologize for what?”

“You scolded me earlier.”

“I didn’t scold you.”

Shang Zhitao let out another wail, collapsing back into the seat and crying again. Tears streamed down her face in pairs, and her nose began to run. Luan Nian wanted to strangle her: “Stop being difficult, Shang Zhitao. If you keep this up, you can sleep in the car!”

“This is what men are like—they don’t care when you’re drunk, they get impatient… and they even scold you…” Shang Zhitao continued to sob pitifully.

Her crying gave Luan Nian a headache. After a long standoff, he finally crouched down in defeat: “Alright, I shouldn’t have raised my voice at you. I’m sorry.”

“Then compliment me.”

… Luan Nian thought to himself, if I ever let you drink a drop of alcohol again, I’ll take your last name: “Compliment you for what?”

“For being beautiful.”

Luan Nian couldn’t help but snicker: “Alright, you’re extremely beautiful.”

“And smart.” Shang Zhitao added.

“Yes, and smart.”

“And talented.”

“Mm-hmm, very talented.”

It took a lot of effort for Luan Nian to get Shang Zhitao out of the car. Carrying her upstairs, she fell asleep after just a few steps. He placed her on the bed, helped her undress, wiped her face with a damp towel, and fed her some water. By the time everything was done, it was late into the night. Luke, freshly bathed and clean, sat at the head of the bed watching them with a puzzled expression: “What’s wrong with Mommy? Why does she look so strange?”

“Your mom went crazy today.”

Luan Nian lay back on the bed, picked up the book from his bedside table, flipped to the page he had marked, and pulled out the wish list. The list served as his bookmark, reminding him where he left off in the book and also reminding him of the aspirations a certain girl once had for life. Placing the list gently on the table, he read a few more pages. Shang Zhitao rolled over, placing her leg on his. Just before she could kick him in her sleep, Luan Nian locked her legs in place: “Even drunk, you can’t stay still!”

In the middle of the night, Shang Zhitao rolled over again, grasped Luan Nian’s hand, and mumbled, “We all miss you,” her voice tinged with sadness.

Luan Nian squinted at her in the darkness, unable to see clearly. His fingertips brushed against her cheek, which was wet with tears. She must have been having a sad dream.

Many people liked to use the phrase “time changes everything,” often followed by “people change.”

Luan Nian knew whom Shang Zhitao meant by “we” and whom she referred to as “you.” Since their reunion, they had never talked about it, but when Luan Nian opened a book on Shang Zhitao’s bookshelf, he recognized the notes written inside—notes that revealed who had written them.

After such a restless night, Luan Nian woke up in a bad mood. When Shang Zhitao came downstairs looking for him, she saw him on the treadmill and walked over, giving him a smile.

“Did you sleep well?” she asked.

Luan Nian glanced at her without answering, continuing his run.

“Are you in a bad mood?” Shang Zhitao asked again.

He ignored her until he finished running, then said to her: “Do you even know your current alcohol tolerance?”

“My tolerance is pretty good now.”

“How much did you drink yesterday?”

“I don’t remember.”

Luan Nian grabbed his phone, opened a video, and handed it to her: “Take a look for yourself.”

Shang Zhitao saw herself in the video—drunk, disheveled, tears and snot smeared across her face. She refused to let Luan Nian touch her, accusing him of being ungentle and not knowing how to speak kindly.

Shang Zhitao laughed at herself: “No more drinking, no more drinking.” She explained: “I only drink like this with Sun Yu.”

“What about Fu Dong?”

“What about Lumi?”

“Did you not drink with He Yun and Shang Zhishu?”

Luan Nian continued his questioning, his displeasure evident. It wasn’t just because of Shang Zhitao’s drunken antics or her behavior earlier—it was also because of what she had said in her sleep.

“I drank a bit too much yesterday. I’ve never done that before,” Shang Zhitao apologized with a sheepish smile. “Was it tiring to take care of someone who’s drunk?”

“No.”

“But you look tired.”

Luan Nian stopped talking and went upstairs to prepare for a shower. Shang Zhitao followed him. “Did I snore or kick you while you were trying to sleep?”

“No, you talked in your sleep.”

Luan Nian undressed as he glanced at her. “The most annoying thing about you when you’re drunk is how much you talk in your sleep.”

“What did I say?”

“You said…” Luan Nian paused for a moment, then smirked mischievously. “You said you love me so much.” With that, he closed the door.

As he showered, Shang Zhitao listened from outside. Eventually, curiosity got the better of her, and she cracked the door open slightly, peeking inside.

Luan Nian stood under the showerhead, water cascading over his hair, down his face, and lingering on the tip of his nose before dripping slowly onto his shoulders, chest, and abs.

Shang Zhitao was momentarily mesmerized. She swallowed hard, inwardly cursing herself for being such a pervert.

Under her bold gaze, Luan Nian seemed to grow more confident. Seeing her standing frozen, he teased her: “Either come in or get out.”

Shang Zhitao wanted to go in, but her body felt awkward. She smiled and said, “Sorry for intruding,” and closed the door just as she heard Luan Nian mutter something under his breath.

Feeling elated, she sat on the bed waiting for the “handsome man to finish his bath.” Her thoughts drifted to all the attractive men on short-video platforms, but few had the same charm as Luan Nian. She even entertained the idea of filming him if she ever went bankrupt again—maybe she could make money off him?

When Luan Nian came out, Shang Zhitao asked him, “What are we doing today?”

“Sleep.”

With that simple reply, he lay down on the bed. When he saw that Shang Zhitao hadn’t moved, he pulled her close to lie beside him. “Let’s rest for a bit.”

“And then?”

“And then I’m meeting some friends tonight. Want to come along?”

“I’m going shopping with Lumi tonight.”

“Alright.”

True to her word, Shang Zhitao had indeed made plans with Lumi. This was Lumi’s rare visit to Beijing, and they had arranged it beforehand. That evening, Luan Nian dropped her off where she and Lumi planned to meet, then headed off to his own gathering.

This gathering had been organized by Tan Mian earlier that morning. Upon hearing that Shang Zhitao was in Beijing, he specifically told Luan Nian to bring her along. When Luan Nian arrived, everyone else was already there. Lin Chun’er stood up and rushed to the entrance, only to find no one behind him. She asked, “Where is she?”

“She had other plans.”

“If I’d known Shang Zhitao wouldn’t come, Xiao Mei and I wouldn’t have come either.”

“She’s meeting a friend.” Luan Nian explained.

Lin Chun’er and Xiao Mei didn’t usually enjoy attending men’s gatherings. They only came because Song Qiuhang and the others mentioned that this time would be different—Shang Zhitao, the celebrated woman everyone wanted to meet, was in town for a conference. So they decided to join.

Luan Nian remained silent.

Throughout the meal, he hardly spoke. Shang Zhitao wasn’t like other girlfriends who felt compelled to share every detail with their partners. She was out shopping and hadn’t mentioned anything to Luan Nian.

Lin Chun’er secretly took a photo of Luan Nian and sent it to Shang Zhitao: “Madam Shang Zhitao, your boyfriend looks melancholy.”

Shang Zhitao, who was helping Lumi try on clothes, laughed when she saw the message: “What’s wrong with him?”

“Maybe because everyone else has their girlfriends or wives chatting with them, and he’s jealous?”

Lin Chun’er was sharp enough to read Luan Nian’s expression and understood why he was upset. He had wanted to introduce his girlfriend to his friends, but she hadn’t come. Men could be complicated, but sometimes they were also quite simple.

Lumi emerged from the fitting room and noticed Shang Zhitao replying to the message. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing.”

Shang Zhitao told Lumi about Luan Nian’s invitation to join the dinner. She hadn’t thought much of it.

After Lumi paid for her items, she said to Shang Zhitao, “You should have gone today.”

“Why? I haven’t seen you in ages.”

Lumi draped her arm over Shang Zhitao’s shoulder. “Are you being difficult? Why didn’t you go when he invited you to meet his friends? Listen, don’t waver while you’re dating him. You’ve never been that kind of person, so don’t create problems for yourself. Today’s situation is your fault—you should have ditched me, dressed up nicely, and gone to meet his friends. Why shouldn’t you? Do you think you’re not good enough? If you don’t seal the deal, someone else might step in! Look at Luke—even though he’s in his forties, plenty of people want him. You need to infiltrate his life, understand? Be omnipresent.”

“And then what?”

“Then make sure he thinks about you all the time.”

“For example?”

“For example, build good relationships with his friends so they’ll mention you often. Leave your things at his place so he’ll think of you whether he’s eating or… well, using the bathroom. Give him underwear so he’ll think of you every time he takes off his pants…” Lumi rattled off examples, making Shang Zhitao laugh uncontrollably.

“Did you enroll in a dating workshop?” Shang Zhitao joked.

“Is stubborn donkey training you to be hurtful?” Lumi shot back, giving her a playful shove. “Go, Shang Zhitao. Be decisive, like you used to be.”

Lumi was sharp. She could see the issue between Shang Zhitao and Luan Nian: Shang Zhitao wasn’t as resolute as she once was. Or perhaps her determination had matured, becoming less obvious than when she was in her twenties—no longer so clear-cut and straightforward.

Shang Zhitao secretly messaged Lin Chun’er: “Chun’er, where are you guys?”

Lin Chun’er sent her a location.

She hailed a taxi and headed there.

It was nearly 9 PM when she arrived. She messaged Luan Nian: “Hello, can I join your gathering now?”

“?”

“Can you come out and pick me up?”

Luan Nian, who had been feeling gloomy for hours, suddenly felt a ray of light pierce through. A smile broke across his face. The others looked at him quizzically: “?”

He stood up and walked out of the restaurant, spotting Shang Zhitao waiting there. “Weren’t you supposed to be shopping?”

“I still want to shop, but I also want to have dinner with my boyfriend and his friends.”

“It’s just leftovers now.”

“That doesn’t matter.”

“What does matter?”

“Being with you matters.”

Shang Zhitao didn’t often speak sweet words, but when she did, they came from the heart. Luan Nian wasn’t someone who fell for flattery easily, but he couldn’t resist Shang Zhitao’s sincerity.

“Let’s go,” he said, leading her inside. Just before entering, he suddenly grabbed her hand.

Shang Zhitao’s heart skipped a beat, and her face flushed red.

“Why are you blushing? Can’t we hold hands?” Luan Nian teased knowingly, gripping her hand tighter as he led her in.

Lin Chun’er, always the mischief-maker, started cheering and making a scene, drawing attention from the entire restaurant.

Shang Zhitao’s palms began to sweat. Over the years, she had accomplished small feats—traveling alone, hosting trilingual press conferences, managing projects worth hundreds of millions. She had met influential figures, from provincial leaders to street vendors—but she had never felt this nervous.

Her fingertips were even a little cold.

Luan Nian led her to the table. The group, which had been silent during the meal, suddenly came alive. “Let me formally introduce you all to my girlfriend, Shang Zhitao.”

“Hello, everyone,” Shang Zhitao said shyly, her face turning red. She felt like she was back in her early twenties, innocent and pure.

Lin Chun’er stood up and hugged her: “Hello, internet friend.”

“Hello, philanthropy director.” Shang Zhitao responded earnestly.

Xiao Mei embraced her next: “Hello, trilingual genius.”

“Hello, archaeology expert.”

Tan Mian shook her hand: “I feel like I’ve seen you somewhere before.”

“That year, you and Luan Nian performed ‘I Hate Myself for Loving You’ at our company anniversary. I was in charge of crowd control. The female colleagues went wild.”

Lin Chun’er pointed to their intertwined hands: “So, can Luan Nian let go now?”

“No.”

Luan Nian refused, pulling out a chair for Shang Zhitao to sit beside him.

For a long time, Luan Nian hadn’t enjoyed gatherings where partners were invited. Song Qiuhang was always affectionate with Lin Chun’er, gifting her flowers or forbidding her from showing her waist. Chen Kuannian often joked around with Xiao Mei. At these events, he would often feel a sense of loss, thinking of the girl who always tried to avoid him whenever he answered the phone.

Love needed to permeate.

Like sunlight seeping through the cracks in the curtains, slowly filling an entire room.

Infiltrating each other’s lives, sharing friends, secrets, hobbies, exploring mountains and rivers together, and building a life together.

Luan Nian hadn’t understood or cared about this before, but time had taught him.

He believed he could do better.

Starting today.