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Of course, they went home together in the end.
Lin Zhan became more and more comfortable at Shen Xi’s house, practically treating it as her own. In fact, she felt even more at ease there than at her own home.
Whenever she passed a fruit store and saw fresh fruit, she would buy a few to take to Shen Xi’s place.
Lin Zhan eyed a dragon fruit and asked Shen Xi, “Do you eat dragon fruit?”
Shen Xi glanced at her, “Doesn’t matter, don’t you eat it?”
“I do, but I can’t eat a whole one,” Lin Zhan weighed it in her hand, “I just had lunch, I can only manage half.”
The owner, honing his knife, said, “Then I’ll cut it open for you two, one half each, and I’ll give you two small spoons.”
Shen Xi said, “Okay.”
After cutting the dragon fruit, Shen Xi carried it home. Just as he was about to go upstairs, he opened the newspaper box by the door and took out the day’s newspaper.
Lin Zhan: “...”
“Is this newspaper subscribed by your dad?”
“No,” Shen Xi said, “I subscribed to it myself.”
Lin Zhan was stunned for a long time, “You still read newspapers now?”
This habit, something only her grandfather had... she hadn’t seen it in a long time...
Shen Xi nodded, “Mm.”
Lin Zhan: “Don’t you have mobile apps now? Can’t you read news on your phone?”
Shen Xi: “Uncomfortable.”
Lin Zhan smiled and walked in to press the elevator. Shen Xi asked, “What are you laughing at?”
“Nothing, I just think your lifestyle is very much like a retired cadre.”
“...”
________________________________________
Upon arriving home, Lin Zhan was still thinking about her dragon fruit.
Lin Zhan washed her hands and stood at the table, “I’ll just eat it here, so I don’t drip on your bed.”
“Otherwise...” Shen Xi glanced sideways, “Do you usually eat in bed?”
“Yeah,” Lin Zhan said, “In the summer, I’d hug half a watermelon, sit in the air-conditioned room, and eat watermelon while watching variety shows. It’s paradise.”
Shen Xi didn’t respond, he just went to a room nearby and brought out some kind of mat. He walked into his own room and laid it out.
“Come in,” Shen Xi said, “Just sit in here and eat.”
Lin Zhan looked troubled, “This... isn’t good, is it?”
After speaking, she quickly sat down, letting out a satisfied sigh.
Shen Xi handed her half of the dragon fruit and a spoon.
She entertained herself in the room while Shen Xi tidied up some things outside.
He tidied for forty to fifty minutes, until it was time for her to go to class.
He pushed open the door and found that Lin Zhan had, predictably, fallen asleep.
She was curled up, sleeping on her side, with her hand tucked under her head. She looked deeply asleep, her abdomen rising and falling gently.
Shen Xi glanced at his watch.
Forget it, let her sleep for another ten minutes.
He walked over and noticed a wisp of hair clinging to her cheek.
So he gently raised his hand and brushed the stray hair aside.
Just as he was about to get up.
His gaze shifted just slightly, and he saw her lips.
Perhaps because she had just eaten dragon fruit, her lips were stained with juice, covered with a faint red.
It was like drops from a dropper, the juice unevenly distributed, in small, scattered patches.
He thought, it must be because he always had obsessive-compulsive disorder.
There was no other explanation, it had to be that.
So he reached out and, with his thumb, rubbed Lin Zhan’s lips.
As if possessed, he looked at the soft, warm, and wonderfully textured pink object under his hand.
But the unevenly distributed juice didn’t spread.
So he lowered his head and carefully wiped her lips again, from corner to corner.
As soon as his finger left, before Shen Xi could make any further movements, Lin Zhan’s eyelids fluttered and she opened her eyes.
She was awake.
Shen Xi thought as he looked into her eyes.
The next second, Lin Zhan rolled over, lying completely flat.
Their breaths tangled, swirling like silk threads.
She looked directly into his eyes.
The next second, she conjured a cunning smile.
She placed her hand on his shoulder and asked, feigning sincerity, “Shen Xi, were you just trying to kiss me?”
Shen Xi clenched his back teeth, his Adam’s apple bobbed rapidly twice, and then, he admitted it.
He said, “...Yes.”
Lin Zhan suppressed a smile, subtly turned her head, bit her lower lip, and whispered, “No kissing allowed.”
Her words, though a refusal, only made the atmosphere more enchanting. Their breathing grew more frantic in the heated air.
Shen Xi straightened up and walked out of the bedroom.
________________________________________
In the evening, Ye Qian and the others came home on time, bringing Zhang Ze with them.
Zhang Ze grinned shamelessly, “I ran into them on the way, Auntie invited me for dinner.”
Shen Xi glanced at him, then returned to his room to continue working on his problems.
As soon as Zhang Ze entered, he saw Shen Xi deep in thought and quickly plonked himself on his bed.
Before he could even settle, Shen Xi shot him a dagger-like look.
Zhang Ze awkwardly stood up.
“Your bad habit hasn’t changed a bit, you treat your bed like a treasure, no one’s allowed to touch it.”
“Sigh... I recall our first night, you even made me sleep on the floor. I want to cry.”
“You can sit too,” Shen Xi said plainly.
Zhang Ze’s face lit up, “Really...?!”
Shen Xi added, “You just might not see tomorrow’s sun.”
Zhang Ze: “...”
Zhang Ze: “Hmph, if I don’t sit, I don’t sit, I’ll just... Oh my god!! What’s on your bed! Shen Xi!”
Zhang Ze exclaimed in shock. Shen Xi frowned and turned back, “What?”
Zhang Ze pointed at a drop of red liquid on his bed, “Why the hell is there blood on it!”
“...” Shen Xi didn’t even need to think. He asked, “Are you colorblind? This is purplish-red, where does it look like blood?”
“This doesn’t look like it?!” Zhang Ze was about to tear off the bedsheet, “At first glance, it really looks like it! Who the hell did this?! Why aren’t you mad?”
“You said you’d kill someone if they touched your bedsheet?!”
Shen Xi: “Lin Zhan ate dragon fruit at noon, maybe some juice dripped on it, or maybe I dripped it accidentally when I gave it to her, I’m not sure.”
Zhang Ze: “..................”
“You actually let Lin Zhan sit on your bed?! And let her eat on it?!”
Shen Xi raised an eyebrow, “Problem?”
After speaking, he moved from his chair and looked at the light-colored dragon fruit juice drop.
Association is a very bad thing.
...
He thought of the uneven liquid clinging to Lin Zhan’s lips at noon.
Zhang Ze opened his mouth, “Are you admiring it? Don’t you think the shape of this thing, how it dripped so perfectly round, is special?”
Shen Xi looked up and said, “Mm, you guessed right.”
Zhang Ze: “...”
“In the past, people loved someone and all their possessions. Now, Shen Xi loves Zhan and everything about Zhan.”
“Shen Xi, do you know what you look like now?”
“What do I look like?”
“Every word you say is in the shape of loving her.”
“...”
________________________________________
The glorious holiday didn’t last long, and soon, Shen Xi returned to his regular routine of a three-point line: home, school, Lin Zhan’s art studio.
On the day of the autumnal equinox, there was a hint of coolness in the air.
On the way home, there were people selling small trinkets along the road.
Actually, this street, when she first saw it, was quite a pleasant surprise, endlessly enjoyable. But now, Lin Zhan had lost all interest.
She even felt she could recite by heart where each shop was located and what products they mainly sold.
But this time, there was a new small stall by the roadside.
The things hanging from its crossbeam were quite beautiful.
Lin Zhan stopped and took a look.
The shop owner, barely in her twenties, was very young. Seeing Lin Zhan show a little interest, she introduced, “Do you like it?”
“These are handmade items, I made them myself.”
Lin Zhan looked at something hanging in the very center that she couldn’t quite name.
It was a bit like a wind chimes, but larger. A ring was tied to a string, and many things hung below the ring: feathers, glass beads, tassels...
It was a very delicate item.
The shop owner explained, “This is a dreamcatcher. Native Americans use it to purify dreams, filtering out nightmares and chaotic thoughts. There’s a hole in the center of the net, and only good dreams can pass through. Nightmares stay in the net and dissipate with the morning sun.”
“If you buy this and hang it in your bedroom, you’ll sleep very well every night.”
“Can I make it myself?” Lin Zhan asked.
Shop owner: “Of course! Many girls here buy them to make themselves, as birthday gifts for friends. Giving a dreamcatcher as a gift is a very precious gesture, it means giving them a good dream.”
Lin Zhan was a little tempted, she thought for a moment, then turned to tease Shen Xi.
“Hey, it seems you hate craft classes the most, don’t you? The first time I saw you was because you didn’t attend that craft class.”
Shen Xi nodded and replied, “Mm.”
After a moment of thought, Lin Zhan said, “I do want to buy one, but I’ve been too busy and tired lately, I might not have time to make it.”
The shop owner was kind and smiled, “It’s alright, I’ll be back later. You can buy it when you have time.”
After saying goodbye to the shop owner, Lin Zhan asked Shen Xi on the way back, “Do you really dislike handicrafts that much?”
“Mm, a waste of time,” Shen Xi said thoughtfully, “And I feel like the things made are silly.”
“It is a bit strange for boys to do those things. Like me, I loved doing handicrafts when I was little, I even made small drawers and stuff... At that time, some people in my class would pay high prices for them,” Lin Zhan said. “But then I stopped because I got busier and busier. I’d rather sleep than spend that free time.”
“Is the college entrance exam coming up soon?” Shen Xi suddenly asked.
Lin Zhan paused, then said, “About two more months, I guess.”
He pondered for a moment, “Nervous?”
“College entrance exam?” Lin Zhan chuckled, “I’m not nervous about the college entrance exam. I usually only get nervous in situations where everyone’s watching. I think the college entrance exam is less nerve-wracking than next week’s competition.”
“Competition? Another competition?”
“Yeah,” Lin Zhan sighed, looking up at the night sky, “Lin Zhengping told me the day before yesterday, and I didn’t feel much. Maybe I’m numb. But I didn’t sleep well that night.”
She kicked a small stone, complaining to Shen Xi, “You don’t know, this time there’s only one spot for the whole school, and... this is an inter-provincial competition, completely different from our style here. They set up a sub-division here. That night I looked at the art style of that province, and it really gave me a headache because it’s completely different from mine... It’s hard for me to completely conform no matter how I change...”
“Then don’t change,” Shen Xi said softly, “You have to believe in yourself. As long as you perform at your truest level, it doesn’t matter.”
He paused, then added, “You draw very well.”
Lin Zhan remained silent.
Shen Xi continued, “Actually, I used to often feel a lot of pressure because of high expectations, which led to underperforming.”
“Later I realized, competition isn’t the whole meaning of my life. If I fail this one, I’ll try again next time.”
In the evening breeze, his voice was so gentle it almost made her tear up.
“In psychology, there’s a term called the spotlight effect, which means people themselves exaggerate their small mistakes infinitely. Some people feel that when they make a mistake, others will definitely notice and constantly ridicule them, but actually, they won’t. People will only remember that moment, and then quickly forget about it afterwards.”
He wasn’t good at comforting people. This long passage, he had thought about it for a very long time, piecing it together, wanting to tell her when she was wandering, confused, and stressed.
“If you don’t do well in this competition, people will only discuss it briefly. They won’t remember it forever, and they won’t keep watching, waiting for you to make a fool of yourself. Once the hype dies down, it’s pretty much over.”
“Don’t feel like everyone is always watching you. Actually, no one is watching you. The one truly watching you is yourself, Lin Zhan.”
Every word, like a pair of hands, lifted the huge stone that had been weighing on her heart for a long time.
The blocked blood finally began to flow slowly.
Perhaps it had been too long since she received this kind of guidance and affirmation, leading Lin Zhan to give herself a wrong suggestion, and then continuously act on it, ultimately crushing herself.
Actually, all this time, the greatest pressure hadn’t come from Lin Zhengping, but from herself.
She always thought that if she didn’t do well enough, if she wasted this most precious spot, she would be ridiculed.
She had always been too proud since childhood, not wanting to experience any moments of humiliation.
She said, “Mm, I understand.”
Shen Xi walked beside her, yet it was as if he stood at the end of a dark tunnel in front of her, where light and hope resided.
“Don’t think about what might happen if you don’t do well. You don’t need to care about what others think. Just have a clear conscience.”
His words tonight seemed exceptionally numerous, each one directed at her, hitting every part she cared about most.
She didn’t know how she could be so lucky to have Shen Xi say these things to her.
When she first saw him, she jokingly said he was her light of hope. At that time, she simply meant that in her painting, she would find a peaceful state of mind in him.
But at that second, the second her heart stirred, she clearly knew better than anyone else—wasn’t Shen Xi her light of hope?
His calmness and composure would help her overcome the various bottlenecks in her life.
All of his strengths were precisely what she lacked.
That night, after returning home, Lin Zhan eagerly put a new piece of paper on her drawing board.
Many of her painting inspirations came from a sudden sentence.
She spent a full twenty hours over ten days painting this picture.
She titled it “Survivor.”
The protagonist stood on a crumbling cliff, a knife hanging at her throat.
Two ropes were tied to the knife: one was attached to a branch above, allowing the knife handle to hang normally, while the other was tied to the protagonist’s hand.
She had to reach out her hand to pull the rope, making the blade move away from her fatal area.
She had to reach out to the person in front of her to survive.
As she finished the last stroke, Lin Zhan felt a strong emotion inside, her chest trembling.
She thought—yes—
I am loving him, and I am also saving myself.
________________________________________
Zhang Ze recently discovered that Shen Xi’s phone contained several short videos, which he would take out and watch from time to time.
And whenever he tried to lean in to see what Shen Xi was watching, Shen Xi would discover him first and successfully avoid his gaze.
Zhang Ze: “Why can’t you share with me?”
Shen Xi squinted at him, “Why should I share with you?”
Zhang Ze was surprised, “If you share, I can send you stuff later too, you know.”
Shen Xi: “Thanks, no need.”
This one was already giving him enough headache.
Zhang Ze didn’t give up, “I’m really curious, seeing you watch so sneakily.”
Shen Xi: “I’m watching openly.”
Zhang Ze: “I want to see.”
Shen Xi: “You won’t understand.”
Zhang Ze: “Why wouldn’t I understand?! Is there anything I don’t understand?”
Shen Xi: “Because I don’t understand.”
Zhang Ze puffed out his chest, “Just because you don’t understand means I don’t understand?! Besides, what’s there not to understand? It’s just the same old...”
Shen Xi, annoyed by him, handed over his phone and said, “Okay, then you look. See if you understand.”
“Tsk, how could there be anything I don’t understand!” Zhang Ze took the phone, ready to show Shen Xi his wisdom.
Zhang Ze saw what was on the screen.
“..................”
Shen Xi tapped the table, “Five minutes thirty-four seconds, how did that thread get through the net?”
Zhang Ze: “...”
Shen Xi continued, “At ten minutes, which hole was the last stitch threaded into?”
Zhang Ze’s hair stood on end, and he leaped up from the table, “I was all ready, and you show me a crafting tutorial?! You hate all this messy stuff, you even skip class.”
“What’s going on now? You’re starting to love all this needlework?”
Shen Xi was concise, not even moving an eyelid, “Less nonsense, understand?”
Zhang Ze scratched his head, “This, I might need to consult a female classmate. I also, I also don’t quite understand...”
So that day, everyone saw Zhang Ze scurrying around, chuckling as he pulled something out of his pocket, whispering with a female classmate, studying it together.
________________________________________
Zhang Ze only helped Shen Xi for one day, but Shen Xi was busy for over a week.
The night before Lin Zhan’s competition, Shen Xi finally finished the item successfully.
As Shen Xi cleaned out his backpack, Zhang Ze poked his head around, peeking.
“So... you’re giving it to her tonight?”
Shen Xi calmly said, “Mm, she has a competition tomorrow.”
Zhang Ze nodded understandingly, then sneered, “I’ve never seen you care so much about anyone.”
“Hey, didn’t you tell me before that handicraft class was a waste of time?”
“So, how does it feel to eat your words now?”
Shen Xi: “...”
Anyway, from the moment he realized he liked her, he had prepared himself for this.
________________________________________
That night, Shen Xi went to pick up Lin Zhan. He was very silent the whole way, as if contemplating an opening line.
Lin Zhan glanced at him, “You seem preoccupied tonight.”
Shen Xi didn’t answer, asking her instead, “What time is your competition tomorrow?”
“It starts at nine tomorrow, so I’ll probably have to get up around six or seven.”
“Sleeping at home?” he asked.
Lin Zhan nodded, “Of course, otherwise, I’ll sleep at your place?”
“I’ll call you tonight,” he said.
Lin Zhan smiled, “Don’t you call every night?”
“Tonight... it’ll be a little longer,” Shen Xi said softly, “I have something for you.”
Lin Zhan’s interest was piqued, and she raised an eyebrow, “What is it?”
Shen Xi took out the square, long, small box from his backpack and handed it to her.
The box was light green, and it even had a bow tied on it.
It looked quite exquisite. Lin Zhan shook it and asked again, “What is this?”
With that, she tried to open it.
Shen Xi stopped her in time, saying, “Open it when you get back.”
“So mysterious, huh? Alright, I’ll open it when I get back.”
________________________________________
Upon arriving home, Lin Zhan immediately took a shower.
After drying her hair, she sat on the bed and casually checked the public account for tomorrow’s competition, which had pushed some excellent works favored by the judges.
She read them carefully and felt a little wistful, but she wasn’t as nervous or dejected as before.
She felt her heartbeat; it was normal.
She glanced at the time, guessing that Shen Xi would call soon.
He always called at roughly the same time.
Sure enough, as soon as Lin Zhan plugged in her earphones, Shen Xi’s call came in.
Only then did Lin Zhan place the box he had given her on the bed, kneeling reverently before it.
“I’m ready, can I open it now?”
Shen Xi’s voice was calm, “Mm, open it.”
Lin Zhan opened the handmade box, and an exquisite handcrafted item appeared before her eyes.
...
A dreamcatcher?!
She was a little stunned. She reached out and picked up the top strap of the dreamcatcher, pulling the entire dreamcatcher out.
That day, after meeting the dreamcatcher seller, Lin Zhan did some research herself when she got home.
The net in the center of the dreamcatcher’s hoop is hand-woven, stitch by stitch.
The hoop itself was originally iron, a basic silver color. It needed to be wrapped little by little with a matte leather cord to cover its original color.
Because the leather cord wasn’t thin and had a square cross-section, it was easy to get tangled when wrapping, so it needed to be wound along the correct angle, otherwise, it wouldn’t look good.
The feathers hanging from the hoop were also glued onto the leather cord by hand.
In addition to the light green feathers, there were also some small, matching-colored beads strung onto the leather cord to enrich the overall design of the dreamcatcher.
Lin Zhan asked into the phone, “Did you make this yourself?”
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