#88: Qin Xing & Chu Ran - How Should I Love You

At midnight on February 14th, Qin Xing received Chu Ran’s Valentine’s Day wishes right on the hour, but he missed opening it immediately. The large group chat he was in was flooded with messages, and he was also involved in the frenzy. A minute ago, Jiang Chengyu sent out an explosive message in the group: [Shen Tang and I are having a baby, and in five more days, it’ll be four months. Fraternal twins.]

Why did Jiang Chengyu choose Valentine’s Day at midnight to announce that he was becoming a father, of all times, just to provoke them? They weren’t envious of anyone getting married, nor of anyone becoming a father. But they were jealous of anyone who became the father of a boy-girl twin set. Just thinking about the two adorable little ones made them want to scoop them up and cuddle them. Many people felt a huge blow and started @-ing the group owner, asking if Jiang Chengyu could be removed from the group.

Besides Jiang Chengyu, there were two other people in the group who had boy-girl twins at home. They enjoyed the show and shared a few photos of their own soft and adorable twins. It was a “scam-to-have-children” photo series. Qin Xing even wanted to have children like that after seeing them. But then he thought, how could a daughter born to Chu Ran be anything close to soft and adorable? She’d probably climb onto the roof and tear down all the tiles, dismantling their villa’s roof. Thinking about this, Qin Xing paused, finding it amusing. What was he even thinking? What did Chu Ran’s children have to do with him?

Qin Xing had been leaning against the headboard, playing on his phone. Now, his mood suddenly became very subtle. The group was still buzzing, but he had lost the desire to join the commotion. At twelve thirty-two AM, he finally saw Chu Ran’s “Happy Valentine’s Day” message.

That night in Shanghai, when Chu Ran cried and confessed to him downstairs at his apartment, he admitted that for a moment, he softened. The words of rejection were on the tip of his tongue, but he just couldn’t say them. But after cooling down for a while, he was inexplicably afraid of her arrogant temper, how she would lash out at everything and everyone, and he felt unable to tolerate it anymore. He really didn’t know how to reply to this Valentine’s Day message, so Qin Xing simply sent her a 200 yuan red packet. It was a kind of reply.

Chu Ran hadn’t slept yet, perhaps waiting for his message. In less than a second, she opened the red packet. Immediately after, her message came in: [I thought you wouldn’t reply to me. Thank you for the red packet, I’ve accepted it.]

About ten minutes later, Qin Xing received a long message from Chu Ran.

[I don’t know how to pursue you, and I don’t have time. My scenes are packed every day, and when I get back, I still have to ponder tomorrow’s plot. Then Yuan Yuan told me that acting well is the best response to you. I thought about it, and it’s true. This is your first time starting a business, and what I can do to help you is to seriously play every role well, so that all your efforts won’t be in vain. I will also slowly change my bad habits. I don’t know how long this process will take, but will you wait for me?]

Qin Xing looked at his phone screen, finding it hard to imagine Chu Ran saying such words calmly.

Chu Ran: [I have to get up early for filming tomorrow, so I’m going to bed. You should also go to bed early. Good night.]

That night, it was Qin Xing who suffered from insomnia.

The next morning, Qin Xing went to the company. He brewed himself a cup of coffee to ward off drowsiness. Shen Tang also arrived quite early today. She stopped at the door of his office. “Chu Ran’s drama wraps up at the end of the month. Sister Li said it’s a good time for a gathering. What are your thoughts?” Qin Xing had a flight to Paris at the end of the month to see if he could find more fashion resources. He rejected Shen Tang without thinking: “I’m busy.”

Shen Tang stared at him. “What were you doing last night?” Qin Xing knew his face looked bad, and his eyes were bloodshot. He smiled, “A date, what else?” Shen Tang nodded and quickly left. Qin Xing sipped his coffee, engaged in a tug-of-war within himself.

________________________________________

Chu Ran only had three scenes today, filmed at a theater, where her character, the female lead, was performing on stage. Today, she was filming with professional dancers. Zhou Mingqian asked her to rehearse with them a few times to quickly find their rhythm. She had diligently practiced for several months before filming began; Shen Tang specifically hired a dance instructor to guide her. Now, performing on the same stage with a group of excellent professional dancers, she was not at all inferior.

All three scenes were filmed smoothly. Only the first scene had two NGs because Chu Ran was nervous and missed her cues. Later, she fully immersed herself in the role and truly enjoyed the opportunity to return to the stage. The three scenes combined might only amount to less than twenty minutes of screen time in the TV series, but she had practiced for countless days and nights with Qin Xing’s company. She remembered clearly that on the second day of resuming dance, after the high-intensity training from the previous day, her entire skeletal frame felt like it was falling apart after a night’s sleep. Everything ached. She asked Shen Tang if she could use a body double for the filming. Shen Tang stared at her for more than half a minute, not saying a word. Chu Ran endured the pain, tears still in her eyes, and sheepishly went back to practice.

Qin Xing had ordered her favorite colorful fruit tea that day. She felt terrible all over and didn’t bother with Qin Xing, finding him annoying, and even lashed out at him.

When “Cut!” was called for the third scene, applause erupted from the audience. Many temporary actors had been hired to act as the audience today. Looking out, there were people everywhere, and the lighting was dim, making it hard to distinguish anyone. Chu Ran let out a sigh of relief. While dancing, she had been thinking of Qin Xing.

This drama suited her and Qin Xing’s situation quite well: “When I finally realize, when I turn back from being lost, when I turn around and look for you, ‘How Should I Love You’.” What was Wen Di, the scriptwriter, thinking when she wrote these words? How could she have such profound understanding?

Chu Ran returned backstage to remove her makeup. She checked the time; it was 12:15 PM. According to the filming schedule, the third scene was supposed to be in the afternoon, but everyone was in sync today, so Zhou Mingqian filmed all three scenes in one go. The afternoon was free for her to arrange.

“I really envy your company’s artists.” The actress next to her, who was also removing makeup, chatted with her. Chu Ran smiled, wondering why she suddenly made such a remark. The actress said, “Your boss isn’t a pig-headed chauvinist who engages in casting couch practices, not to mention everything is arranged perfectly. You only need to act, and you don’t even need to socialize.” If she weren’t bound by a contract, she would also want to sign with Shen Tang’s company. “Your Boss Qin comes to visit whenever he’s free,” she continued playfully, “I’m so envious and jealous.”

Chu Ran was confused. When did Qin Xing come to visit? “Did you see Qin...” The name ‘Xing’ almost slipped out, but she changed it at the last moment to, “Did you see Mr. Qin?” The actress didn’t answer directly, but asked, “You didn’t see him?” Chu Ran shrugged, she really didn’t. The actress simply assumed she was too immersed in her role. “He was sitting in the audience, acting as an extra. I caught a glimpse of him when he was talking to Director Zhou.” As for where he went now, she didn’t know.

“I’m leaving, got a date.” She had a semi-public boyfriend, and they had plans to celebrate Valentine’s Day. Chu Ran asked her assistant for a cup, and took several sips of warm water to calm her racing heart. Qin Xing choosing to visit on Valentine’s Day should mean something, right? Perhaps, things were about to take a turn for the better for her.

[I saw you.] She said this deliberately, afraid Qin Xing wouldn’t wait for her.

Qin Xing: [Chu Ran, don’t talk nonsense with your eyes wide open.]

Chu Ran pursed her lips, a smile unconsciously spreading across her face. [Anyway, I saw you. Where are you? I’ll come find you and treat you to a meal.]

Qin Xing didn’t bother to reply to her. Chu Ran didn’t even bother with her skincare anymore. The face mask her assistant had given her was shoved into her bag. She grabbed her phone, ready to get up and go to the parking lot to find Qin Xing. Suddenly, her body froze. In the mirror, she saw Qin Xing talking with Zhou Mingqian and the others. Seeing that he was not far behind her, Chu Ran saw the light at the end of the tunnel.

Chu Ran didn’t disturb them. She messaged Qin Xing: [I’ll wait for you by your car.] She didn’t know which section his car was parked in, so she would have to search section by section.

Qin Xing finally replied: [Wait at the back door, the driver will come.]

Chu Ran gave her assistant half a day off, telling her not to follow her. As soon as she reached the back door of the theater, Qin Xing’s low-key black sedan slowly drove over. This car was a new purchase for Qin Xing, bought last month. Unlike his previous flashy sports cars, this one, though luxurious, exuded a sense of stability and sophistication.

Chu Ran waited in the car for over ten minutes before Qin Xing slowly emerged. “You came to visit, why didn’t you tell me beforehand?” Qin Xing took off his trench coat and placed it aside. “I didn’t plan to come at first; I had something to discuss with Zhou Mingqian.”

“Oh.” Chu Ran felt a little disappointed, but the fact that he could now speak to her in a normal tone was a small step forward. However, it was just her wishful thinking; he hadn’t even finished speaking.

Qin Xing continued, “I came to be an extra and earn some extra cash.”

Chu Ran: “...” “How much do they pay you a day?”

Qin Xing casually made up a number: “Two hundred.”

Chu Ran looked surprised. “That much? You’re so rich.” Qin Xing was half-choked, glaring at her, but saying nothing. Chu Ran was in a good mood and didn’t mind his gaze. The fact that he came to see her today, even acting as an extra in the audience to watch her dance, was the best Valentine’s Day gift for her.

Chu Ran almost smiled. “Then you’re treating today. We’ll spend exactly two hundred.”

Qin Xing leaned back in his seat, resting his head. “I’m going back to the company to eat takeout.”

Chu Ran: “...” “That works too. Don’t mention it, I’m actually craving some special snacks.”

Qin Xing was feeling sleepy now. He closed his eyes, resting. Chu Ran noticed his tired face. He probably stayed up all night yesterday, so she didn’t bother him further. She gently draped his trench coat, which he had placed on the armrest, over him. Qin Xing didn’t move, his eyelids heavy as he dozed off.

Chu Ran looked out the window. It wasn’t the road back to the company; it was the opposite direction. It must be the restaurant they were going to. She turned back and glanced at Qin Xing. Since she got into the car, he hadn’t spoken to the driver, so it must have been arranged beforehand.

At the next intersection, after turning and driving about a hundred meters, there was a creative flower shop. Chu Ran quietly told the driver to stop there. The driver agreed.

Qin Xing wasn’t in a deep sleep. When Chu Ran got out and closed the car door, he woke up. “Where did she go?” he asked the driver.

The driver: “Miss Chu might be buying flowers.” Stopping at a flower shop, and on Valentine’s Day, it could only be for buying flowers.

Qin Xing rubbed his temples, then also got out of the car with his trench coat. Chu Ran bought a bouquet of balloon flowers, choosing dark wrapping paper. She was wearing a hat and a thick scarf. The flower shop was bustling, and the staff were busy working, taking one order after another, so they didn’t recognize who she was.

She felt a familiar presence behind her. Chu Ran turned around, and Qin Xing was standing behind her, she didn’t know when he got there. He looked around the flower shop, appearing quite intrigued. Chu Ran pointed to the still-being-wrapped bouquet and whispered, “It’s for you.” Then she asked, “Aren’t you giving me one?”

Qin Xing: “...” There were even people who actively asked for flowers.