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Psst! We're moving!
1
I usually change my clothes as soon as I get home from work, swapping my office dress for loungewear.
The zipper on the dress is usually at the back, and sometimes I can’t reach it, so I call Lin Zhiyi for help: “Dà Lín, help me unzip!”
Just at this moment, Xinbao called from the living room: “Dad, help me turn off the air conditioner!”
With no way to be in two places at once, Lin Zhiyi shouted towards the living room: “Wait a minute!”
Then he leisurely walked over and said to me, “Turning off the air conditioner isn’t as important as unzipping.”
I was a little touched. Even after ten years of marriage, my position in his heart hasn’t diminished!
2
When Lin Zhiyi went to take a shower, I lay in bed reading, waiting for him.
Once, while waiting for him, I accidentally fell asleep. The next morning, he said that when he kissed me, I didn’t respond, feeling the interaction was weak. He hoped I would wait for him and fall asleep together.
This guy—eating together, brushing teeth and washing faces together, sleeping together wasn’t enough; he wanted us to fall asleep together too.
After he finished his shower, he called out: “Wife.”
“Hmm,” I responded.
“You’re not even looking at me,” someone complained pitifully.
I shifted my gaze from the book to him and said, “I’ve already seen you,” then continued to read.
“Your gaze isn’t deep enough; it’s too perfunctory.”
“... I’m reading now, quite Zen-like.”
“What are you reading?” He also leaned over.
“Researching our next travel destination. Life needs poetry and distance.”
“Poetry or distance, which do you want?” He asked me.
“Both!” I answered without hesitation. Living poetically and traveling afar don’t conflict!
He took the book from my hand and turned off the light.
“What are you doing?”
“You said you want both. Since we can’t go far right now, I’ll handle the poetry first.” As he spoke, his kiss landed.
“...”
3
On the eve of the college entrance exam, Lin Zhiyi woke up and told me he had a dream about the exam.
He dreamed that on the day the results were posted, everyone else was on the list except him.
“After graduation, dreaming about exams always feels like a nightmare.” If I dream about handing in a blank test paper, I won’t sleep well all night.
“It’s not exactly a nightmare. The funniest part was when I went to ask our homeroom teacher and English teacher what happened, and he said, ‘Get someone to translate your essay and earn some extra money.’”
That made me laugh too. “Your English teacher is truly wise. Although no one translates your essays, your words are always recorded by someone, even written into books.”
“Do you remember when we were in a long-distance relationship, and I came back to school to see you after graduation? We were eating in the cafeteria, and I don’t know what I said, but I saw you laughing and pulling out a small notebook, saying, ‘This is interesting, I need to write it down.’ Not long after, you pulled out the notebook again, saying, ‘This is good, I need to write it down.’
It felt like your sense of humor was too low!”
“People with a low sense of humor are easily happy!”
Yes, I am the kind of person who blooms with just a bit of sunshine! And just right, you are my sunshine.
4
The night before a business trip, while I was packing my luggage, Lin Zhiyi asked me, “Do you need me to help with anything?”
I said, “No, just being with me is enough.”
Before leaving, I planned to tidy up Lin Zhiyi and Xinbao’s white sneakers.
As I sat in the living room cleaning the shoes, Lin Zhiyi came over and said, “Teach me how to do this; in the future, tidying shoes will be my job.”
“Alright, I’ll clean your shoes, and you clean Xinbao’s. Follow my lead. The principle is simple: clean first, then maintain.” Since he was willing to help with household chores, I naturally wouldn’t refuse.
My obedient student Lin Zhiyi sat beside me and started cleaning the shoes with great seriousness.
After finishing the shoes, I went to the balcony to collect the laundry and started folding it on the bed. Lin Zhiyi also came over to fold clothes with me.
“T-shirts should be folded like this,” I taught him.
He quietly learned.
Thinking back, to shake off the label of being a “life novice,” I once bought books on organizing and storage, so I was relatively skilled in folding clothes. Although I was far from Lin Zhiyi in cooking, I was still better at housekeeping.
After everything was packed away, we both went to the bathroom to brush our teeth and wash our faces.
When it was time to sleep, I said, “I found that as long as you’re by my side, even if we do nothing, I feel at ease. This must be the power of companionship.”
He said, “Doing things together makes me happier.”
“... How does that sentence... uh, sound so (You) ambiguous (Dian) (Wu)?”
He innocently said, “What’s ambiguous? You clean shoes, I clean shoes; you fold clothes, I fold clothes; you wash your face, I wash mine. Doing things with you makes me happy.”
“...” His explanation was indeed faultless. Did I just overthink it?
5
While telling Xinbao an interesting historical comic book, If History Were a Group of Cats , I came to Yi Yin, the virtuous prime minister of the Shang Dynasty and China’s first imperial tutor. The book says he was not only strategic but also a “blood tyrant” with an incredibly long lifespan, serving five generations of rulers in the Shang Dynasty and eventually dying at the ripe old age of one hundred.
I told Xinbao, “It seems we need to strive to be not only ‘scholar tyrants’ but also ‘blood tyrants,’ aiming to live to a hundred.”
She nodded and said, “In any case, living to a hundred is the first goal. Because we can do more of what we want!”
Hmm, she’s teachable! She’s learned the signature skill of “chicken soup lemon.”
Later, when she wasn’t focused during dinner, I reminded her, “Eat properly and lay a foundation for living to a hundred. If you understand scholarship and live to a hundred, you’re basically immortal.”
“What if you live to four hundred?” she asked.
I said, “No one has lived to four hundred yet.”
“What if, I mean, hypothetically?” she insisted.
“That person would be an immortal among immortals.”
“What’s an ‘immortal among immortals’?” she asked again.
“A cactus.” Lin Zhiyi said seriously.
Xinbao and I burst into laughter.
His answer was flawless. Cacti are indeed impressive, resilient, able to survive in deserts, worthy of being called “the leader among immortals.”
In truth, I’ve never coveted eternal life. Becoming earthly immortals simply means growing old together with you.
6
“When knowledge is needed, one regrets having too little.” Although I have the habit of reading every day, I still feel it’s not enough. I hope to have the opportunity to enter university and pursue a graduate degree related to literature for systematic study.
I shared my thoughts with Lin Zhiyi and invited him to study together: “We studied at the same university for our undergraduate degrees. It would be even better if we could study together for our graduate degrees. Could we both choose literature-related majors?”
He said, “Sure! But before studying literature for a graduate degree, I suggest we study another subject together.”
“What subject?”
“Anthropology. Our research topic is ‘How to Create Beibei.’”
“...” This isn’t pursuing a graduate degree; this is clearly studying reproduction!
7
I have a writer friend who is successful in his career, has a happy family with both a son and a daughter, and many friends. However, at the peak of his life, he chose to go to a temple for spiritual practice.
Inspired by his real-life experience and some books on life philosophy that I read, I spent some time in deep contemplation every day.
For instance, I often pondered questions like “Why do people live?” “What’s the meaning of life?” “Is it necessary to care about others’ opinions?” “Is achieving worldly success really success?” “Is external recognition of success far less significant than personal spiritual growth?” “Why do many successful people live unhappily?” “Is happiness unrelated to material things, purely a spiritual enjoyment?” “What exactly is happiness?” ... Thinking too much about these life questions sometimes plunged me into a state of pessimistic despair, feeling that all splendor would eventually burn to ashes, just as Zhang Dai wrote in the preface to Dream Memories of Taoan : “Splendor and luxury, all pass before our eyes as emptiness; fifty years have passed, all becoming a dream.” If all splendor turns into a dream, then what’s the point of our hard work and struggles?
During my pessimistic moments, I thought that if one day I couldn’t find answers through contemplation, I might as well renounce the world and seek spiritual cultivation.
If I were to renounce the world, I would first need to get my child’s consent. So I asked Xinbao, “Would you support me if I decided to renounce the world one day?”
“I support you,” she said without hesitation.
“Wow! My baby is so understanding! Supporting Mom in everything she does.” I was deeply moved. I originally thought she would say, “Mom, don’t leave; I need you!” It seems I overthought it.
“You can go now, right now!” She casually pointed to the door, showing great detachment.
“I didn’t say I was leaving right now...”
I felt a bit disheartened. Did I have no value at home? To gain dominance at home, I decided to temporarily abandon the idea of renouncing the world.
Lin Zhiyi said, “This female disciple cares too much about things. Your worldly ties haven’t ended yet; you should cultivate amidst the dust of the world.”
Later, I came across a book titled Living to 100 Years Old , whose cover read: “You should seek the joy of living, not the meaning of life.”
Suddenly, I had an epiphany. If relentlessly questioning the meaning of life yields no result, why not fully enjoy the pleasures of living? Living with Lin Zhiyi and Xinbao, two interesting individuals, isn’t that the joy of life itself?
8
There’s some truth to the saying “A brief separation makes new love grow stronger.”
Upon returning from a company-organized team-building trip, I noticed Lin Zhiyi became more affectionate towards me. Previously, I tended to be the clingy one.
When I got home from work and went to the bedroom to change into loungewear, he followed me and actively sought hugs.
While hugging me, I asked him, “How does it feel to have me?”
He said, “I feel like Bill Gates and Buffett.”
“Oh, so it feels like being a super-rich tycoon?”
“They’ve both said that their greatest investment in life is their wives.”
I laughed, “So I’m your biggest investment?”
“Of course, I have great taste.”
Hmm, I thought he was praising me as the most promising stock, but it turns out he was highlighting his good judgment.
Choosing who to walk with in life is crucial, especially your partner. Because when you choose, you’re not just choosing a life companion, but a way of life.
9
On September 9, 2019, Lin Zhiyi and I celebrated our tenth wedding anniversary. I planned to revisit the place where we first fell in love, to see if the osmanthus still scented the air, if the green hills remained verdant, if the playground was still bustling… I told Lin Zhiyi, “Let’s find time to return to school this year. Go in September, when we first met. Let’s eat outside the west gate of the school again and relive the old flavors.”
“In fact, the restaurants outside the west gate aren’t as flavorful as those outside the north gate. But when you came to school, it was already late; many delicious restaurants outside the north gate were gone.” Lin Zhiyi said.
“It’s not late. As long as I meet you and eat with you, it’s never too late.”
After hearing this, Lin Zhiyi smiled faintly and said, “When you have time, we’ll go back.”
Thus, in September, we returned to C University—the place where we met and fell in love.
“This is where we first met.” He stood under the lush sycamore tree in front of the third cafeteria, just like back then.
“This is where we held hands for the first time.” At the fountain in the small garden opposite the library, he took my hand.
“This is where I confessed my feelings to you for the first time.” He walked to the laundry room under the girls’ dormitory and smiled at me.
...
My youthful memories were awakened again. It turned out that so many of our “firsts” were recorded here.
Moved by the scene, I recalled Lin Zhiyi standing under our dormitory building, me opening the window, and our eyes meeting. It felt as if the youthful days had never left. Inspired, I penned these lines:
Sitting alone by the window counting the years,
Whose youth passes through my heart.
A decade in a dream, fleeting life,
A century together, never apart.
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