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He didn’t know how much time had passed.
As the night deepened, even the faint light that had been seeping in from outside eventually disappeared. Soohyun did nothing but sit alone in the darkness and just cry.
He spent the night prostrate and sobbing, wailing until his voice was hoarse. His eyes throbbed and swelled from the tears he shed all night, but he didn’t care for his aching eyes.
He pounded the floor with his fists, and then collapsed in a heap, crying. When he regained some strength, he cried again, his shoulders shaking with disgust at his past actions.
No. No.
Soohyun, who had been howling like a beast, suddenly lifted his head and abruptly stood up.
He couldn’t end it like this.
Soohyun frantically ran out of the room and headed for the garage.
He started the car, drove out of the house again, and sped mindlessly down the highway. His head was filled with nothing but the three syllables of Yoon Haerin’s name; no other thoughts entered his mind.
If Haerin truly left him.
Soohyun was consumed by only one thought, driving down the road like a madman.
As he saw the morning sun rising beyond the dark highway, Soohyun finally realized he had spent the entire night awake. Looking at the sun scattering light on the road, he prayed that it wasn’t too late.
He had grasped everything of Taesung, but it felt as if he held nothing in his hands. He had completed the revenge he had painstakingly planned for so long, but it felt as if he had done nothing.
Everything just felt futile and meaningless.
If he lost Haerin, that emptiness could never be filled by anything else.
“...I won’t let it be like that. I’ll somehow...”
Soohyun muttered incessantly like a madman. His eyelids were swollen from crying all night.
Even while driving to Taehoon’s villa, tears streamed down his face, blurring his vision. He bit his lip, wiped away the tears, and the car swayed precariously, veering between lanes.
Honk—
Several cars passed him, honking, but Soohyun didn’t even glance at them.
________________________________________
Arriving at Taehoon’s villa, Soohyun hurriedly jumped out of the car and pounded on the gate.
Bang bang bang.
“Haerin-ah! Haerin-ah! You’re here, aren’t you! Haerin-ah!”
He didn’t know what time it was, and he didn’t have the余裕 to even guess. Soohyun pounded on the gate violently several times until he heard a sound from inside.
“Haerin-ah! Haerin-ah, please...”
After hitting the gate with his fist several times, someone finally stirred and stood behind the door.
“...Why did you come?”
It was Haerin.
At the small voice that flowed from behind the door, Soohyun placed his hand on the gate and began to cry.
“Haerin-ah. Haerin-ah. I came because I have something to say.”
“......”
“Haerin-ah, please show me your face. Huh?”
“Say what you have to say and leave.”
“Haerin-ah, I drove all the way here without sleeping a wink. I came all the way here, so at least let me see your face.”
“Hah...”
A long sigh escaped, and then the door creaked open.
“Ah...”
Meeting Haerin’s face after a long time, Soohyun froze on the spot.
He had so much he wanted to say when he faced her, but the moment she appeared before his eyes, his mind went completely blank.
“...Um, have you been well?”
He stammered, barely managing to ask after her well-being.
“Yes. As you can see.”
Haerin answered simply and looked at Soohyun.
Haerin’s face, as she looked at him, seemed more peaceful than ever. It was probably natural, as the last time he had seen her was when she had just been discharged from the hospital. She seemed to have gained a little more weight than then, and her face seemed rounder.
However, at the same time as he felt relieved that Haerin’s face looked better, he felt anxious, wondering if the time she had spent alone, away from him, had been better for her.
Soohyun hurriedly spoke the first words that came to his mind and approached Haerin.
“Haerin-ah. I... I was wrong.”
“......”
As he took one step forward, Haerin flinched and took a step back. Her reaction stung his heart, but Soohyun took another step forward and continued speaking.
“I deeply regret hurting you with the foolish thought that I was doing it for your own good. I’ve only now realized that my thinking was wrong, Haerin-ah.”
“......”
“Can’t... can’t you take me back? I’ve realized that nothing is more important than you.”
As Soohyun finished speaking and took another step towards Haerin, she raised her hand, signaling him not to come any closer. The look of intense wariness in her eyes stopped Soohyun.
“Sunbae. I’m sorry, but it’s too late.”
“Haerin-ah. Why do you only say such hateful things? Do you still hate me that much?”
“...Don’t try to shake me up now. I’ve already sorted everything out.”
“Haerin-ah, please. Don’t do this. Huh?”
As Soohyun took another step towards Haerin, he noticed that she reflexively placed her hand over her belly and stepped back.
“Haerin-ah. You... you didn’t miscarry.”
As Soohyun brightened as if he had found a ray of hope, Haerin’s gaze grew colder.
“It’s none of your business anymore, Sunbae. Don’t concern yourself with it.”
“Why is it none of my business? That child, it’s my child. I’m that child’s father. If we’re going to raise it, we should raise it together.”
Soohyun knew it was a shameless claim of rights. But since that was the only thing he could cling to, Soohyun chose to throw away his pride and be brazen.
“Father? The person who first told me to get rid of the child before it was even born, what kind of nerve do you have to call yourself the father now?”
“No. Haerin-ah. If it includes you, I can accept anything. Whatever it is...”
“Accept it? This child is not an object to be conditioned.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“This child doesn’t belong to anyone.”
“Haerin-ah, I might have misspoke. I’m ready to accept everything about you...”
“Sunbae.”
Haerin calmly cut off Soohyun, who was burning with desperation.
“You said you liked and loved me, and that you pushed me away on purpose to protect me? I don’t know if that’s your way of expressing affection, but normal people don’t express affection that way when they like someone.”
“At that time, I really thought that was the only way to protect you. Can’t you look past the method and see my heart? I wanted to protect you.”
“Do you really think that makes sense? You just needed someone to vent your anger on!”
Haerin’s voice rose. She seemed about to cry, but she bit her lip, held back her tears, shook her head again, and glared at Soohyun.
Every gesture of hers pierced his heart, and Soohyun was simply frantic.
This wasn’t why he had come. He wanted to show her his heart. He wanted to tell her that, from a long time ago, the only person in his heart was her.
“No. Haerin-ah. You, what you meant to me. You were...”
He reached out his trembling hand to Haerin, but she ruthlessly shook it off and refused him.
“Sunbae. You’re just twisted. Everything is abnormal. You, and that entire family you belong to!”
“I know. So you can’t leave me. If I lose even you, what am I supposed to do? You were the only light I had. Please, Haerin-ah. Huh?”
“I’m sorry, but no matter what excuses you make now, nothing will change!”
Haerin, looking at Soohyun pleading and begging, became even more agitated and cried out.
“Sunbae, yes. In my eyes, you resemble Chairman Park that person. That’s why I shudder just looking at your face. You look exactly the same!”
“Haerin-ah.”
Haerin’s face as she looked at him was the very picture of disgust of someone looking at something terrible.
Soohyun couldn’t say any more. It was clearly the expression he himself had made, hating Chairman Park.
Like a person who had received a death sentence, Soohyun slumped down as if collapsing on the spot.
He couldn’t say anything. Hearing from Haerin’s mouth that he resembled the Park Chairman he hated so much, all the strength drained from his body. His head felt numb as if he had been hit hard with a hammer.
“Then I hope we never have to see each other again.”
Haerin, her face pale, closed the door in front of Soohyun, who was kneeling on the ground looking at her.
Thump.
Soohyun remained motionless, staring at the closed door for a long time.
________________________________________
Turning away after closing the door, Haerin lowered her head and barely swallowed the sobs that were rising to her chin.
Her chest heaved incessantly, agitated. Her heart pounded as if it would burst. As she tried to calm her breathing and soothe her agitation, someone approached.
Lifting her head, she saw her mother watching her a few steps away.
“...Haerin-ah. Do you still hate that person so much?”
Haerin’s mother, her eyes glistening, looked at her daughter with a look of pity and asked. Haerin rushed into her mother’s arms and sobbed.
“I hate him. I hate him so much.”
“What do you hate so much about him?”
“I hate that person who shakes me up like this just by looking at his face. Mom. What should I do? I can’t control myself. I almost ran to grab his hand. Even though I decided not to.”
“Haerin-ah.”
Her mother gently stroked and comforted her trembling, sobbing daughter’s back.
“...Yes. It must still be a difficult time for your heart.”
“Sob.”
“Still, he’s the father of your child and says he’s so sorry. If you don’t really hate him...”
At her mother’s words, Haerin abruptly lifted her head and said.
“I know too. I know everything, but what can I do if my heart won’t let go this easily? What can I do if this isn’t enough...”
Tears fell endlessly.
Her head understood, but her heart wouldn’t accept it. Now that she had decided to have the child, she couldn’t sever ties with the child’s father forever. Especially if that father was the head of a large corporation.
But her heart wouldn’t open. She knew she was hurting Soohyun with her harsh words. She knew his face crumbled every time she spoke.
However, the resentment and hatred that were greater than her feelings of apology wouldn’t go away. She didn’t even know how to get rid of them.
She had given him too much of her heart to hate him completely, and the wounds were too deep to accept him again.
“Hee-heuk.”
She just cried, feeling suffocated. Then, Haerin’s mother quickly embraced her and soothed her.
“Haerin-ah. Yes, I know, I know. Come here, my daughter. If you cry, the baby will cry too. Let’s think about your body first.”
Supported by her mother, Haerin crossed the garden, then stopped walking for a moment and turned back to look at the gate where Soohyun had stood.
She couldn’t easily take her steps, feeling as if Soohyun, who had looked at her with a pale, white face, would still be waiting for her behind the door.
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