SELA - 64

The store lights flickered on and off momentarily. Sa-hee and the other customers were briefly shaken.

A moment later, the lights came back on properly. Customers who had awkwardly made eye contact while looking around refocused on the items they were browsing. The commotion quickly subsided.

Sa-hee also fell back into deep thoughts over the two ties. Which one would be better? Imagining Ji-hyuk, she held them up to her chest. Just then.

Thud. Thump. Thump.

Something fell beside her. Sa-hee looked down and saw cement fragments and dust scattered next to her shoes. What was this? She naturally looked up at the ceiling.

“......”

There were noticeable cracks all over the ceiling. And in between the cracks, dark patches where pieces of concrete seemed to have fallen away, leaving holes. What on earth...?

Sa-hee put down the tie she was looking at and picked up her shopping bag again. For some reason, she had a bad feeling.

Having wandered to the innermost part of the store, she began to walk briskly, feeling an urge to ‘get out.’

At that moment, drrrrrr, the ground and the entire building began to rumble and shake. It was an earthquake.

Screams erupted from everywhere. They should evacuate to a safe place, but Sa-hee had a strange, insistent feeling that she had to get out of here quickly, and she couldn’t stand still.

Stumbling but continuing forward, she abruptly stopped when she tripped over a large rock that had fallen right in front of her. Suddenly, a chill ran down her spine, and her whole body trembled. A keen intuition drew Sa-hee’s gaze upward.

“......Ah.”

It was a groan that escaped her lips involuntarily. That groan became Sa-hee’s last word in this life.

The building collapsed. Fortunately, the victims couldn’t even feel the pain. It happened so instantaneously.

The number of victims could be counted, but the total amount of related sorrow was immeasurable, and the grief and mourning continued for quite a long time. That’s how people like Ji-hyuk ended up existing. Those who couldn’t replace death decided to be together instead.

‘That’s why I came back to meet you again, Yoon Sa-hee.’

Sa-hee’s eyes shook violently. It wasn’t her who had died, but Ji-hyuk, so what on earth was he talking about?

Ji-hyuk looked worried that Sa-hee might be terrified and run away at any moment. But Sa-hee had no such intention. Rather, she only wanted to unravel the unknown thread and see it clearly with her own eyes.

Her body, chilled by the rain, felt clammy. Both Sa-hee and Ji-hyuk’s faces were turning pale. Sa-hee felt it was impossible to talk any more here.

Sa-hee, having wiped her already soaked face with her hand, looked at Ji-hyuk and opened her mouth.

“Let’s go to my place for now.”

“Come in.”

At Sa-hee’s words, Ji-hyuk stepped into the entrance. Rainwater dripped from both of them. Taking off her shoes and entering the house, Sa-hee first grabbed towels from the bathroom. Then, she took out some clothes that Cheol-woo had left behind before.

“Where would you be more comfortable changing? Bathroom? Room?”

“Since I’m wet, the bathroom would probably be better.”

“Then you can change in here. The bathroom is right next door.”

Sa-hee handed Ji-hyuk a towel and clothes, pointing towards the bathroom. Ji-hyuk’s eyes, which had followed the direction of Sa-hee’s fingertip, returned to her.

“Why? Do you have something to say?”

“No.”

Ji-hyuk, who gave a short answer, swept back his wet hair and went straight into the bathroom. The living room, where the door had closed with a click, was enveloped in silence. Left alone, Sa-hee absentmindedly rubbed her cheek. Did I have something on my face? Why did he look at me like that?

But only for a moment. Noticing a small puddle of water forming at her feet, she hurried to the closet. She had to change her clothes quickly too.

Soon, the two of them, having changed, came out to the living room. A strange atmosphere hung in the air, quiet because they weren’t speaking. The sound of rain outside seemed particularly loud.

“Please sit down.”

Sa-hee, finally breaking the silence, pointed to a chair at the dining table for Ji-hyuk. Ji-hyuk, who was drying his hair with a towel, quietly sat down on the chair as she had told him to.

Watching him sit down, Sa-hee went to the counter and pressed the button on the electric kettle. Soon, a red light appeared on the button, and the sound of water boiling, shhhhh, filled the air.

While the water was boiling, Sa-hee hung her wet clothes and Ji-hyuk’s clothes side by side on the veranda. She wanted to put them in the dryer right away, but it was impossible since his clothes were a suit.

Looking around for a moment, Sa-hee approached Ji-hyuk and held out her hand. When Ji-hyuk looked at her questioningly, she pointed with her finger to the wet towel around his neck. Only then did he give a short “ah” and hand over the towel.

The collected towels were put in the laundry basket, destined for the washing machine. It wasn’t really urgent, but she just felt like she had to do something, so she kept moving busily. If she stayed still, she felt like she would be overwhelmed by various thoughts and suffocate.

“This is the only kind of tea I have.”

Sa-hee, having started the washing machine, handed Ji-hyuk a mug. It was green tea with hot steam rising from it.

Sitting across from him, Sa-hee wrapped her hands around her mug. She had changed her clothes, but she still hoped this warmth would envelop the lingering chill in her body.

The sound of rain poured in through the slightly open veranda door. Listening quietly to the sound, the two of them were silent again for a while. Sa-hee looked at his hands while sipping her tea. The mug looked like a toy in Ji-hyuk’s large, straight hands.

This time, she mustered a little more courage and looked at his shoulders and jawline. Fortunately, the white short-sleeved shirt that Cheol-woo had left behind seemed to fit him reasonably well. The shoulder area was a little stretched, but overall it wasn’t bad.

His lips were firmly closed. His body must have been chilled from the rain, yet his lips were quite red. Sa-hee always found his neither-smiling-nor-frowning lips strangely peculiar. Thanks to that, it was never easy to tell what he was thinking.

Taking another sip of her tea, Sa-hee put down her mug. Then, finally, she raised her gaze further and looked into his eyes.

“......”

“......”

Ji-hyuk was looking at Sa-hee. She didn’t know since when, but even before she looked at him, he had been quietly gazing at her like that. Meeting his deep and persistent gaze, Sa-hee opened her mouth.

“Was everything you said earlier sincere?”

“Yes.”

“It’s true that it’s hard to accept all at once. A building collapse...”

He covered his eyes with one hand as if he had a headache and sighed.

“I wish I could just take out all my memories and show them to you.”

“......”

“I understand it’s hard to believe. It must sound absurd and bewildering. You probably think this Shin Ji-hyuk has finally gone crazy. But, without a single lie, it’s the truth. There was an accident, you died, and I made a wish to see you again. That’s all.”

“You made a... wish?”

“Yeah. I wished desperately. I said I would endure anything if I could just see you again.”

Sa-hee’s hand trembled slightly. Because of that, the tea in her mug sloshed a little. Ji-hyuk hadn’t noticed yet.

“We got married in June. You wanted a fall wedding, but I couldn’t wait and rushed things, so it happened that way.”

Ji-hyuk smiled warmly, as if recalling a past event.

“Looking back now, it was a close call. If I hadn’t been so impatient, you and I might not have even gotten married, and you would have left.”

Sa-hee’s heart pounded faster and faster. Sweat began to form in her palms.

“Just one week. The accident happened a week after we got married.”

“......”

“It’s all my fault. If you hadn’t gone there because of me...”

“......”

“Then you wouldn’t have had to go through that, that pain.”

Ji-hyuk’s gaze was fixed on the table. He seemed too sorry to even meet Sa-hee’s eyes. Soon after, Ji-hyuk, having moistened his dry lips, finally raised his gaze.

“What I’m about to say will sound even crazier.”

“I’m listening.”

“I met a man at your funeral.”

“......Ah.”

At that moment, tea touched the back of Sa-hee’s hand. Her hand had trembled uncontrollably, causing the mug to tip over. Only then did Ji-hyuk, noticing Sa-hee’s pale, frozen face, stand up in surprise.

“Are you okay? What’s wrong? Is it because you got rained on?”

“No.”

“Is it because of my story?”

Ji-hyuk righted the mug and wiped the tea with a tissue. He went to Sa-hee and knelt down on one knee in front of her. Then he took Sa-hee’s hand and looked at it carefully, as if checking if she had been burned.

“I’m okay. It was just lukewarm tea...”

“Let’s stop for now.”

“Continue.”

“You’re going to get sick like this. Let’s rest first.”

Despite Ji-hyuk’s strength as he stood up and tried to pull her hand, Sa-hee didn’t move. She stubbornly remained seated, eventually making Ji-hyuk turn back to her.

“Your health comes first. We have plenty of time, so we can talk slowly.”

“No. There’s something I want to show you.”

Sa-hee, looking at Ji-hyuk, got up and went into the room. Then, after a moment, she came out holding something. It was an ordinary leather notebook that the company gave out every year-end or New Year’s.