Chapter 45

It Seems Like No One Wants to Give Up

REGARD’s tradition for three consecutive years—offering free hot mulled wine for Christmas, staying open all night—is one of the most unique holiday atmospheres on Yuyuan Road.

After losing his wife, Li Ai seemed determined to keep this festive spirit alive.

Rebuilding a café in Shanghai within three days isn’t a difficult task. Hu Xiu heard from Zhao Xiaorou that she had moved her family’s Christmas tree to REGARD, hurriedly ordered glass for the shop in Qingpu, and personally bought a cartful of Christmas decorations for the store, vlogging as she decorated the space while carrying a camera.

In the video, she looked nothing like someone who had just argued with Li Ai, wearing a red sweater paired with a yellow-green scarf, looking just like a Christmas gift.

During her 72 hours of busy work, Hu Xiu saw that Diao Zhi Yu had posted a harmonica on his social media at midnight only to delete it shortly after. Between work breaks, she opened shopping sites, carefully compared items, added them to her cart, and then reluctantly removed them.

Indeed, in the midst of a busy schedule, Christmas Eve quietly arrived.

When she first heard that Li Ai was inviting everyone to the store to exchange gifts, Hu Xiu felt somewhat awkward.

She rarely encountered such situations. Placing a gift among many and having it randomly picked without knowing who would choose it only made her more anxious, leading to eventual disappointment.

Now, without that burden, and with no longer having the awkward crush, she could just enjoy exchanging gifts with her friends in a relaxed atmosphere.

It was hard not to say it was a mental relief.

Hospitals rarely have a Christmas atmosphere; the small shops lining the narrow streets on either side are cut off from the festive vibes.

Hu Xiu placed a crystal ball with Christmas colors on the table, and when she turned it on, snowflakes gently floated inside the clear sphere.

She had always loved Christmas, especially in a city like Shanghai, where the holiday spirit was so strong.

Inspired by Xu Meng, she bought a cherry-red wool coat, stiff and draped beautifully, which went perfectly with her long, straight black hair.

Looking into the mirror, it seemed like something had changed, though she couldn’t quite say what, but in the short months since meeting Diao Zhi Yu, her baby fat had faded.

As for her Christmas gift, she had picked out a stylish black shirt in a boutique she randomly stumbled upon. The shirt was unisex, comfortable to the touch, wrinkle-resistant, and very easy to care for—perfect for someone like Diao Zhi Yu.

When she returned to the office holding the shopping bag, she couldn’t help but laugh. The shirt seemed custom-made for Diao Zhi Yu, and she had instinctively chosen it for him. She would now place it among all the gifts, waiting to be randomly picked by someone else—an almost self-inflicted act of masochism.

She went to Senior Sister’s office to print some materials, and Chen Yang was still there, translating documents.

It seemed he was already preparing for his official conversion next year. Senior Sister jokingly asked, “Where are you spending Christmas, Hu Xiu?”

“A friend invited me to a gathering.”

“What about Chen Yang?”

Chen Yang adjusted his glasses and looked up. “I’m going to the Bund with my girlfriend.”

“Ah, youth is all about freedom! As for me, I’m stuck with my husband and kids, stuffing gifts into Christmas stockings. Who has time for a gathering?”

Senior Sister’s expression was genuinely disgusted. “All I want to do right now is drink and have some fun.”

A colleague behind them laughed. “You’ve been posting about your kid’s international school Christmas poster for days. What’s there to complain about? Sweet burdens.”

Surrounded by a few married women, Hu Xiu couldn’t quite tell if they were envious or sarcastic. She was just focused on the fact that after work, she planned to wrap her gift in a way no one could guess what it was, before heading to REGARD.

As Christmas Eve neared the end of the workday, the atmosphere in the office lightened considerably. Senior Sister was tidying up her desk. “I saw Dr. Pei change into a new outfit today, wearing shirts under his white coat, looking energetic. I wonder where he’s going tonight. Hu Xiu, are you spending Christmas with him?”

“I’m not sure. I don’t know.”

“Ah, you should really seize the opportunity. Don’t let this playboy slip away. I thought he was finally ready to settle down.”

“Playboy?”

“He’s got a lot of girls chasing him. After all, with his looks, there aren’t many like him in the hospital.”

“See, if you’re not spending Christmas with him, he’s just going to be with someone else. Men at his age don’t wait for just one thing.”

Before Senior Sister could finish, Hu Xiu’s phone vibrated. It was a brief message from Pei Zhen: “Tonight’s gathering at REGARD. Li Ai invited me. Wanna join?”

Hu Xiu replied with a smile: “Sure…”

Confident that Pei Zhen would be late for the evening’s consultation, she packed her gift into a long black box, placed it in a shopping bag from a Shanghai women’s store, and sat in the passenger seat of the car.

Pei Zhen glanced back at it, as if trying to remember the gift, but then furrowed his brows in confusion. “I’m afraid I can’t pick this one.”

“Don’t be so old-fashioned. This is from an old brand on Huaihai Road.”

“It’s just... I’m not sure I’ll use it.”

Hu Xiu saw through his playful trick: “Who knows...”

This made Pei Zhen squint his eyes as he drove. He might have sensed it—the barrier between them was slowly fading away.

As Hu Xiu gently swayed her shoulders with the music in the car, she thought to herself: moving on in time wouldn’t hurt so much.

When she had cried in Li Ai’s arms in the cold wind, she had figured it out—no matter how painful the ending, she wouldn’t erase the happiness. Completely overturning things was something only foolish young people did. Adults learned to click “save” and moved forward honestly as friends.

When the car stopped at Anxi Road, Pei Zhen suddenly said, “You go ahead. I need to take my gift out secretly, and you can’t peek when we go in. After all, I’ve already seen yours. The game can’t be too easy.”

Hu Xiu tilted her head and looked at him. The big man seemed unusually childish today.

Pei Zhen seemed to soften under her gaze: “Or maybe you really want to see my gift. Well... I can show you.”

Hu Xiu got out of the car, carrying a bag from a women’s and children’s goods store. “You said it yourself—this game can’t be this boring,” she said.

As she entered the store, her heart skipped a beat. Diao Zhi Yu looked up and saw him, his gaze lingering on her for a few seconds before he turned away, deliberately avoiding her.

He was dressed in a black sweater and black jeans, with black curly hair that complemented his pale skin. His jawline and nose were sharp, like the clean lines of a knife. If she didn’t know him, her first impression would undoubtedly be of an aloof, handsome guy.

The feeling of liking someone doesn’t fade easily.

A hand waved lightly in front of her—it was Li Ai, gently signaling her not to be too obvious.

Hu Xiu said, “I specifically put it in a bag, no one can guess this gift is from me.”

Pei Zhen also saw the bag and showed clear disdain. “I came here with him.”

The figure carrying boxes seemed a bit distracted, but Hu Xiu clearly heard every word.

Li Ai glanced at the bag. “This bag really is quite funny.”

Diao Zhi Yu didn’t look at the gift in Hu Xiu’s hands at all.

REGARD had recovered even better than expected. The coffee shop, originally with half-and-half colors, had new wallpaper, and the soft furnishings had all been replaced. The damaged cashier counter was now adorned with an angel sculpture made by a designer. In other areas, there was a Fender bass, foreign books, and theater scripts neatly arranged on new bookshelves. The decor filled the space, and where there had once been empty corners, a vintage-style organ had been placed, with its lacquered finish reminiscent of an antique.

Hu Xiu felt a little moved. These were the gifts that Li Ai’s friends had sent to celebrate Christmas for REGARD, small and seemingly insignificant, yet they gave the little store life.

With everyone’s care, the shop was bursting with energy—so much so that it almost felt overwhelming. No one could destroy their little sanctuary.

The drama selections in both English and Chinese, along with photography textbooks, and the Pentax 6x7, Nikon D90, and Leica M7 in an acrylic display case, seemed to be rare collections placed there by Diao Zhi Yu. He quietly guarded Li Ai’s home, not easily distancing himself from his life.

A feeling of both heartache and relief.

The stack of gifts was as high as a mountain, with around twenty or so gifts of all sizes. Hu Xiu’s box was hidden within, appearing inconspicuous.

This was probably for the best. From what she knew of Diao Zhi Yu—who loved niche products and sought out small but beautiful things—he would likely sift through the pile of gifts and find her box.

The moment she saw him, a small spark of desire ignited in her heart. She couldn’t deny it—this gift was indeed bought for him, and Diao Zhi Yu’s name had long been in her subconscious.

“Is everyone here?” A loud voice came from Zhao Xiao Rou. She was wearing a black dress with reindeer antlers on her head, and her high heels clicked loudly. She looked like the embodiment of Christmas spirit.

She held a large bag of gingerbread men in her arms and placed it heavily in front of Li Ai. “There’s still sugar that hasn’t been taken down, the taxi’s rushing me.”

Young unfamiliar faces wandered through the store, speaking a mix of English and Chinese—it really was a Christmas atmosphere in Shanghai.

Xu Meng emerged from the kitchen, still wearing her red coat, as if she were brewing hot mulled wine. The gingerbread men that Zhao Xiao Rou had brought were passed to her from Li Ai.

Pei Zhen also entered with a gift, greeted Li Ai, and said to Hu Xiu, “Hu Xiu, could you step aside for a moment? I need to hide my gift.”

This wasn’t a peaceful Christmas Eve—it was a battlefield on Guyuan Road.

Fifty cups of mulled wine were neatly arranged on the table. The aroma of alcohol mixed with the sweet smell of cinnamon and apple, filling the room warmly.

The gifts occupied most of the space, and people were crowded in the store. Eventually, they opened the door and spilled out onto the street, chatting and drinking, occasionally going back inside to eat cake.

Zhao Xiao Rou stole the show, weaving through the crowd with the demeanor of a store owner, her cheeks flushed with victory. “Today the drinks are unlimited! Don’t bring out the roast chicken too early—we need to take pictures with the gifts first! Hey, that foreigner! Don’t get too close to the gifts, Hu Xiu, translate for me and tell him not to pick yet, it has to be fair!”

Li Ai smiled gently, though a bit helplessly. Xu Meng just quietly sat in the corner. Being single in this competitive atmosphere seemed to give her a little more of a chance.

Pei Zhen was holding only a bottle of Pentax wine and spoke with a peach-flavored soda: “The atmosphere is so good. In the past, we either spent Christmas in the office or in surgery, doing nothing and the night was over before we knew it.”

“Then why don’t you drink?” Hu Xiu asked.

“I’m always on standby. Soon enough, patients with cuts or food poisoning will arrive, not to mention alcohol poisoning or overeating.”

Pei Zhen clinked his glass with Hu Xiu’s and said, “Merry Christmas.”

“Guess I’ll have to drink two glasses for you then.”

Diao Zhi Yu’s injured hand gently appeared between them. “Excuse me...”

Just in time to interrupt. Pei Zhen stopped Diao Zhi Yu’s elbow and said, “This scar isn’t healing very well. Come to the hospital when you have time and I’ll stitch it up again.”

“It’s fine, just a small thing.”

After a few seconds of silence, Diao Zhi Yu was standing right next to Hu Xiu, his breath a little uneven, looking somewhat agitated.

Hu Xiu had seen Diao Zhi Yu like this before—his indifference clearly showed in the slight furrow of his brow, a look she could catch. He turned his head again, deliberately not letting her see.

“A scar like that will look ugly. It’s on your arm, you can’t even wear short sleeves.”

“It’s fine, girls like it.”

The surrounding noise was drowned out by her thoughts. Hu Xiu watched Diao Zhi Yu’s evasive eyes, her heart pounding in her chest.

It was as if she was testing the waters when she spoke first, “Dr. Pei is a master, maybe the hand will look like nothing ever happened.”

Diao Zhi Yu didn’t say anything and just walked away. Pei Zhen laughed and said, “Although I could do about 90% of that, don’t exaggerate.”

Hu Xiu didn’t quite catch Pei Zhen’s words. She only stared at Diao Zhi Yu’s sulking back—she had moved on so quickly, but he wasn’t indifferent.

Her heart ached as she casually chatted with Pei Zhen, her eyes subtly scanning the pile of gifts. Perhaps one of those wishes was meant just for her.

The long green packaging was too complicated; its flashy design would likely be disliked by him; the one placed in the corner was probably specially delivered, which was a hassle; the small red box with a subtle touch was completely not his style.

Someone started clapping, it was Li Ai. The surroundings quieted down, and he raised his glass, paused for a moment, then shook his head and smiled: “Sorry, I’m really not good at occasions like this. REGARD has come this far today thanks to everyone, and… Merry Christmas.”

This made everyone laugh. Outside, someone cheered, and the whole space became noisy. The music was turned up a bit, and no Christmas party could escape Mariah Carey’s All I Want for Christmas Is You.

Zhao Xiaorou stood on a stool and pointed at Diao Zhiyu in the distance: “Diao Zhiyu, come take a group photo for everyone, it’s time to open presents!”

Everyone crowded together. Pei Zhen stood close to Hu Xiu and simply put his arm around her.

Diao Zhiyu didn’t join the group but was carefully setting up the camera on a tripod. His hand wrapped in bandages stood out against his black outfit and pale skin. Behind him, a girl remarked, “That photographer is so handsome.”

Hu Xiu swallowed nervously.

Finally, it was time to reveal the presents. A few young ABCs who studied abroad quickly took the colorful ones, and a couple with rock-inspired hairstyles took the fabric bags beside them. The gifts were unwrapped in turn—drumsticks, an oven, film, a pocket printer...

Hu Xiu felt a little regretful. Everyone had prepared such creative gifts, and hers seemed so careless.

If she had taken the time to listen to a musician’s advice near the conservatory and selected a delicate harmonica, it wouldn’t have been an issue.

At least when the gift was unwrapped, Diao Zhiyu would know that she was quietly paying attention to him.

There would always be lingering feelings in her heart.

Zhao Xiaorou jumped off the stool: “It’s my turn. I’ve been eyeing this strange-shaped one for a while, and look at the clever packaging, could it be from Li Ai?”

She confidently walked over and reached for the khaki-colored packaging: “I’ll take this one…”

She was, of course, guessing that it was from Li Ai. A foreign girl behind her called out, seemingly it was a gift from her boyfriend.

Zhao Xiaorou’s face couldn’t hide her disappointment. She tore it open roughly—it was a tea set.

Zhao Xiaorou rolled her eyes: “Oh my God, I don’t even drink tea, what a mess. Anyone want to swap?”

A foreigner had drawn a stack of twenty pirated CDs, a very Chinese thing, and happily declared he was going to stick them on the wall.

Half the gifts were already taken, and Hu Xiu’s black box was gradually revealed, making her heart race.

Diao Zhiyu stayed where he was, playing with his phone, but Pei Zhen seemed a little nervous: “Oh, that green one looks good, I’m curious, hasn’t it been picked yet?”

After the gifts were unwrapped and their owners recognized, he cheered up again, then moved on to find the next target.

After listening for a while, Hu Xiu understood that he was carefully looking for the gift hidden in the women and children’s store packaging.

Zhao Xiaorou tapped Diao Zhiyu: “Hey, go get a gift.”

“I don’t mind,” Diao Zhiyu stood up, straightened his back, and walked over. Someone behind him gasped. The man, who looked so stern among the gifts, casually touched and tapped each box, his fingers brushing over Hu Xiu’s black box and pausing.

Hu Xiu nervously watched his long fingers—please, pick it up, pick it up…

Diao Zhiyu picked up the red velvet box beside it, stood straight, and a girl behind him excitedly shouted: “Handsome guy! You picked mine!”

The ice-cold handsome guy gently greeted her. It was a small Sony speaker. It was indeed just right for Diao Zhiyu, who was a fan of Sony for everything, though he didn’t show it. The girl jumped over to add him on WeChat, and he didn’t refuse.

Hu Xiu turned away a little frustrated. Pei Zhen sighed beside her: “It’s my turn…”

He deliberately lightened his steps and stood in front of the boxes for a long time, touching each one and glancing back at Hu Xiu, almost as if testing her.

Hu Xiu calmly looked at him, feeling a bit melancholic, until he picked up her long box and nervously opened it: “Let’s see if I’m lucky…”

The black shirt unfolded without a crease. Hu Xiu smiled gently: “It’s mine…”

She had never seen a man so excited for her gift.