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No matter how many times Joo-Hyuk reassured her that everything was fine, Sena felt increasingly guilty. It had been one thing to hear it for a day or two, but now she wanted to snap back and ask him what exactly was “fine.”
Nothing was fine.
Absolutely nothing.
After confirming there was still some time before her first counseling session of the day, Sena knocked on Seol-Young’s office door.
“Come in,” came the reply, and as she opened the door, Seol-Young greeted her with a face reflecting mixed emotions—both curiosity about why she had come and relief that she had finally arrived.
“Sit down.”
With a short sigh, Sena closed the office door firmly behind her and sat across from Seol-Young.
“Would you like a cup of tea?”
“No.”
Even water felt repulsive at the moment.
“Are you eating properly? You look thinner than before.”
“My appetite hasn’t been great.”
“But you’re still eating, right?”
“Joo-Hyuk takes care of me.”
She thought of Joo-Hyuk brainstorming menus with the housekeeper to prepare meals for her, despite her constant complaints about not feeling hungry.
She should feel grateful, but strangely, all she felt was irritation.
“How are things between you and Joo-Hyuk?”
“…Good.”
“I’ve never seen your face look so gloomy when talking about Joo-Hyuk before.”
“…”
“We promised to be honest with each other, didn’t we?”
Sena took a deep breath and slowly exhaled.
When she had agreed to receive counseling from Seol-Young, they had made a pact:
Absolute honesty. No hiding anything.
Even though this was still technically a counseling session, their past agreement applied regardless.
“…It’s just hard.”
“Why?”
“Everything just irritates me.”
Seol-Young’s eyes widened in surprise at the word “irritates” coming out of Sena’s mouth. She pursed her lips into an “O” shape before relaxing them.
“Do you think it’s because of Joo-Hyuk?”
“Huh?”
“Do you think losing the baby is his fault?”
“No, it’s not that.”
How could it be Joo-Hyuk’s fault?
Sena shook her head vigorously.
“I lost the baby because of me. Joo-Hyuk didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Then why are you irritated with him?”
“…Because he doesn’t blame me.”
“What?”
Seol-Young’s puzzled expression prompted her to repeat herself.
“He keeps saying everything’s fine, but nothing is fine! He must be blaming me inside, but he only says everything’s okay on the outside.”
Her voice trembled, and tears welled up at the corners of her eyes.
“And if he keeps holding it in like that, one day his resentment will grow too big, and then he’ll say it’s my fault, that he can’t stand looking at me anymore… Then… Then…”
Then I don’t know what I’d do.
Sena pressed her palms tightly over her eyes. Even so, tears seeped through her fingers and rolled down her cheeks.
“Ugh, I can’t counsel you today.”
Startled by the sudden declaration, Sena wiped her tears and looked at Seol-Young.
Her brow furrowed deeply, Seol-Young fanned her flushed face with her hand and shook her head.
“I need to talk to you not as your counselor, but as your friend.”
“Huh?”
“You’re being stupid.”
There was no argument. It was true.
“Joo-Hyuk would never blame you.”
“But you don’t know that.”
“Do you know? Have you even asked him?”
“…”
“You idiot. Joo-Hyuk is probably enduring your frustration without understanding why.”
That much was true. She had noticed lately that he seemed to be walking on eggshells around her because of her sharp tone.
But what could she do about her anxiety?
“If you keep acting like this, Joo-Hyuk won’t get tired because of the baby—he’ll get tired because of you.”
Her heart sank.
She hadn’t considered that he might be growing weary not because of the baby, but because of her.
“Alright, here’s today’s prescription: Go home and sit down with Joo-Hyuk. Hold his hands tightly and tell him everything you’re feeling.”
“But…”
“No buts. Absolutely no excuses.”
Seol-Young wagged her finger sternly.
“This is the last time I’m doing couples counseling. Where else are you going to find a friend like me?”
She was right, and Sena couldn’t argue. All she could do was nod.
Taking the tissue Seol-Young offered, she wiped away her tears and snot before returning to her own office.
Though her eyes were red and swollen, she felt a little lighter inside. She had secretly hoped someone would yell at her, and while the content of Seol-Young’s words wasn’t what she expected, it still made her feel better.
It was time to talk to Joo-Hyuk.
---
Sena’s irritability had persisted for nearly two months, leaving Joo-Hyuk feeling somewhat at a loss. At first, her emotional expressions had seemed refreshing, but now they worried him.
He considered contacting Seol-Young for advice, but decided to wait until he and Sena could confront their emotions directly.
Fortunately, the myriad of complex issues occupying his mind left little room to focus solely on her.
“Last night’s KMS news ratings hit 13%. That’s the highest in its timeslot. And considering it’s a cable channel, not even terrestrial TV, these numbers are nothing short of phenomenal.”
Eun-Yoo beamed with joy as she shared the good news.
“It’s thanks to the new segment, Fact Check, which you suggested. It’s really caught people’s attention.”
Fact Check was a segment within the news program aimed at verifying whether trending stories were true or contained errors or misinformation. It was Joo-Hyuk’s compromise solution to ensure journalistic autonomy while sticking to factual reporting.
“Aren’t you happy? In a way, we’ve killed two birds with one stone.”
“In some ways, yes.”
“What about the other ways?”
“If this segment gains attention, other broadcasters will imitate it. How long will it remain our unique feature?”
At Joo-Hyuk’s skeptical response, Eun-Yoo slumped her shoulders.
“That day will come eventually, but can’t we enjoy this moment for now? We worked hard to get here.”
“You’re right. Sorry.”
Joo-Hyuk rubbed his face with his palms to loosen up his tense expression.
“What should we do about Reporter Seo?”
“Reporter Seo?”
“We filed a lawsuit against him for spreading false information.”
“Oh, that’s right.”
Now that KMS had been cleared of wrongdoing, it was clear that Reporter Seo’s claims about Chairman Choi colluding with politicians were baseless fabrications made without evidence.
“If we drop the lawsuit, he’ll likely claim we’re hiding something instead of being grateful.”
“You’re absolutely right. He’d do just that.”
When he made such malicious reports, he must have been prepared to face the consequences.
“If he doesn’t apologize, we’ll see this through to the end.”
“And if he apologizes, will you drop the lawsuit?”
“If he apologizes.”
Regardless of whether he apologized or not, Reporter Seo’s reputation was already in shambles. Rumor had it no broadcaster or newspaper would hire him, leaving him effectively unemployed.
“You’re not seriously considering letting him work as a journalist again, are you?”
“Don’t be ridiculous. What kind of journalist is he?”
Joo-Hyuk answered firmly.
“But… is something bothering you? You look troubled. Is it because of Sena?”
“It’s complicated.”
Joo-Hyuk responded with a bitter smile.
“Try to ease up on work and focus more on Sena. Even though it was an early miscarriage, the emotional shock must be immense. You need to be there for her.”
“I know.”
Though he wasn’t sure how much more he could do for her.
“There’s a holiday coming up soon. Why don’t you take a trip together? Spend some time away.”
“Maybe I will.”
“She’ll like that.”
If only that were true.
Realizing that overthinking wouldn’t solve anything, Joo-Hyuk nodded in agreement and stood up.
As he returned to his office, responding to employees’ greetings along the way, he absentmindedly pulled out his phone from his jacket pocket. A message from Sena awaited him.
“Are you coming home early today? I need to talk to you.”
The message had arrived ten minutes ago.
What could she want to say? Judging by her recent mood swings, he doubted it was good news.
Frowning, he briefly considered making up an excuse to delay going home, but Eun-Yoo’s words echoed in his mind.
“Ease up on work and focus more on Sena. The emotional shock must be huge. You need to be there for her.”
Yes, I need to do better.
She had carried and lost the baby. How could the pain not be immense?
“I’ll leave as soon as work ends.”
He typed and deleted the message.
Would saying he’d leave right after work make her feel pressured?
“I’ll be home early.”
Should he have specified a time?
No, that would be too much. Shaking his head, he sent the message.
Still, he couldn’t help glancing at the clock repeatedly, waiting for the end of the workday.
---
“Is the beef hot pot not to your liking?”
Sena tilted her head and asked.
For some reason, she had sent the housekeeper home early and personally cooked a beef hot pot for Joo-Hyuk.
The bubbling stew looked spicy and appetizing in the pot.
“No, I love it. It looks delicious.”
Joo-Hyuk quickly masked his surprise and smiled, picking up his spoon.
After taking a bite, he gave her a thumbs-up with eyes full of admiration.
“It’s really good. I didn’t know you were such a great cook.”
“The housekeeper usually handles everything, so I haven’t had many chances to show off my skills.”
She chuckled with relief.
Why had she gone through the trouble of cooking herself? Whatever she wanted to say, it didn’t seem like bad news based on her demeanor. Still, as they ate, Joo-Hyuk couldn’t shake an uneasy feeling.
They finished eating, cleared the table, and washed the dishes in smooth succession.
“Sit here for a moment.”
Sena patted the spot next to her on the sofa.
Finally, the moment had come. Joo-Hyuk sat beside her, feeling tense.
“Your hand.”
“Huh?”
“Your hand. Give me your hand.”
She held out both hands, so he awkwardly placed his hands on top. She then clasped them tightly.
“Well… I’m not sure where to start. I’ve practiced what to say all day, but…”
“Take your time. I’m not going anywhere.”
“That’s the thing. You’re not going anywhere, but…”
“Hmm?”
Confused by her cryptic words, he tilted his head.
Had he said anything about leaving?
“I’m sorry.”
After a long pause, she finally spoke, her face flushed red with apology.
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