CHAPTER 19

The day they met again after the breakup was entirely unexpected.

After Ha Yue disappeared from everyone’s sight for a while, Xue Jing terminated the lease of the apartment they had shared, paid the penalty for breaking the contract, and when settling the deposit with the landlord, the landlord found that a water pipe in the kitchen had burst, causing damage to the entire apartment. The landlord called Ha Yue, who had previously paid the electricity bill via WeChat, to discuss the cost of repairs.

Ha Yue confirmed that the “other male tenant” the landlord mentioned had already moved out, and they agreed on a time to meet the next day.

Coincidentally, the same conversation took place at the real estate agency as well.

Xue Jing had originally signed the contract with the agency, and he was the one handling the termination, so the agent naturally called him to invite him to inspect the damage and come up with a repair plan.

There is no shortage of failed relationships in the world, and there are so many clouds and rain that no one, except for the two parties involved, cares if their meeting is inappropriate.

It was a Saturday, and the meeting was scheduled for 10 a.m., but Ha Yue had been staring at the ceiling with wide eyes since before dawn.

The birds outside were still asleep, and she couldn’t fall back to sleep. So, she got up, drank a glass of celery and apple juice, and then applied makeup while looking in the mirror.

After choosing the set of clothes she wanted to wear, she decided to arrive at the apartment early to check whether the floor damage was really as bad as the landlord had said, needing a full-scale replacement.

Ha Yue had left the key to the apartment with Xue Jing when she moved out, but fortunately, the spare key they used to keep under the doormat was still there.

By 7:30 a.m., when the sky was just beginning to brighten, Ha Yue had opened the apartment’s security door and walked into the temporary home they had once built with “cardboard boxes.”

Upon entering the room, the first thing she did was not to go into the kitchen but to look around carefully.

She walked around the room, opened all the drawers and cabinet doors, and then started laughing at herself for being so pretentious. In fact, she didn’t want to be seen as a fool; the real reason she had come two and a half hours early was to take the opportunity to search for traces of Xue Jing’s presence in the house.

Xue Jing hadn’t left any red paint on the white walls, nor had he used a baseball bat to damage any furniture. All the glass items they had used were intact in the cabinets. In fact, before leaving, Xue Jing had even cleaned the house carefully, folded the bed linens, and watered the plants on the windowsill.

The actions of the imagined terrifying ex did not occur. That would have been too base, not fitting with Xue Jing’s character.

When they broke up, he had taken the high road—no entanglements, no rumors, no stalking—polite and restrained. It simply wasn’t working, so they ended it without a fuss.

As for her, she had taken herself too seriously. Had she known Xue Jing would react so calmly, she wouldn’t have run away as if she were being chased by a ghost.

Xue Jing didn’t lack female attention. After she hastily left, she believed there would soon be a new contender waiting in the wings.

His new girlfriend must be excellent, at least someone from a similar background. This time, Xue Jing shouldn’t be deceived, right?

Well, that was none of her business. The only person you can save in life is yourself, after all. Overthinking is useless.

The high heels clicked sharply on the floor, and Ha Yue pulled her fingers away from the potting soil she had been touching, wiping the damp coconut husk off her fingertips. Suddenly, she felt extremely tired.

The reason was certainly that she hadn’t been able to catch up on sleep during her days off. After checking the time, she guessed it might also be due to her upcoming period.

She could barely stand.

Bending down to remove the high heels that were torturing her feet, she pounded her chest with one hand, lifted the curtain she had used to partition the space, and walked to the only double bed in the room.

There was no one else in the room, so Ha Yue didn’t need to pretend to be considerate. She simply dropped her shoes and, with ease, threw herself onto the mattress.

The mattress had independent springs, with just the right firmness and excellent elasticity. Both she and Xue Jing liked it.

She turned over, lying on her back with her face toward the window, stretching her arms out, her calves parallel to the edge of the bed, her toes hanging off the side.

The light outside the skylight was gradually getting brighter, and with still some time before 10 a.m., Ha Yue closed her eyes, feeling exceptionally relaxed. Although Xue Jing had left this apartment, it still carried his scent. He was a man, but always smelled good.

She could perhaps take a nap here, she just needed to get up, walk to the entrance, and set an alarm on her phone.

The mattress was just too comfortable, stirring up many loose, tidal sensations, and Ha Yue was so exhausted that she couldn’t muster the energy to sit up from the bed. The moment she closed her eyes, she was already drifting into light sleep.

In the hazy dream, she had a very tender vision. In the dream, she and Xue Jing were still in the midst of their cohabitation and love. On a Saturday morning, they were both resting, and they were preparing to take a car to a nearby city for some inspiration.

Although they hadn’t yet written a complete work, Xue Jing was very superstitious about the foreign authors’ field research methods during the creative process.

There was still time, so Xue Jing allowed her to sleep in, gave her a kiss, and went downstairs to buy breakfast.

He asked her what she wanted to eat, and she said it didn’t matter.

There was a sound of a lock clicking.

He was back with the breakfast.

Ha Yue groaned, still not fully rested. She turned on her side in bed, and her toe hit the edge of the bed, instantly jolting her awake from her sleep.

She and Xue Jing had broken up, and the cohabitation had ended.

She was here today to discuss compensation.

But the sound she heard wasn’t a hallucination; someone really was opening the door outside. And the person who entered must have noticed her bag in the entrance, as the sound of footsteps halted immediately.

The person who entered was Xue Jing, arriving two hours early at the apartment, just like her, unable to sleep and waking up too early.

He used the same key, the spare one that had been placed under the carpet.

From the moment Ha Yue saw the side of Xue Jing’s face, she became like a cat with its fur standing on end, springing out of bed immediately.

The room was too small, with nowhere to hide. She didn’t have time to put on her shoes, so she crouched in the gap between the bed and the wardrobe, trying to cover herself with the nightstand, desperately hoping that Xue Jing would turn around and leave.

But Xue Jing didn’t turn around. He recognized her bag, saw her high heels discarded on the floor by the bed, and froze for a few seconds. His face showed surprise, but more than that, joy. He immediately closed the door behind him.

Xue Jing admired Shakespearean romanticism. To him, this was some sort of divine guidance, completely proving that their story was far from over.

But Ha Yue didn’t think so. At least, as his footsteps drew nearer, her rationality began to fade. The fear of being forced to confront the wound made her act like a madwoman in a hysterical manner.

At first, Xue Jing just wanted to talk to her, to understand what had happened since the breakup, but Ha Yue refused to communicate with him. She kept questioning why he was in the apartment. She unilaterally speculated that Xue Jing had been lying in wait, harboring revenge, and refused to listen to any explanation he had.

Eventually, their verbal conflict escalated into a physical one. She couldn’t escape, couldn’t talk sense into him, so it was like she was trapped in a cage, a wild animal. In a fit of rage, she knocked over a flowerpot, smashed dishes, and tried to run barefoot out of the apartment.

They had argued like this many times during their relationship. Xue Jing used the same approach as before—he hugged her from behind with force, trying to calm her down, waiting for her to eventually relent.

His cheek pressed against her neck, his kiss fell on her spine. His embrace was so close, almost to the point of skin-on-skin.

How much he wished she would say something kind. He didn’t ask for much—a simple apology. No matter the situation, he could convince himself to understand her strange behavior.

But Ha Yue had had a good teacher since she was young—someone who taught her how to scold people. Her words were sharp, and the one-sided verbal attack was hard to endure. He began choking up, using his right hand to caress her face, trying to cover her mouth.

“Don’t say anything, please, just don’t say anything.”

“Can we be quiet for a moment?”

This time, Ha Yue wasn’t swayed by “love.” She only felt that the silent embrace, suffocating and airtight, and Xue Jing’s breath gently sprinkling on her messy hair, every rise and fall, felt like an evil plastic film that prevented her from breathing.

Every part of her body that Xue Jing touched hurt, and her heart felt like it was being tossed into hot oil, fried, and boiled. Her entire being felt dizzy, and she started to have a near-death sensation.

She couldn’t stop screaming, because if she stopped, she would likely start sobbing.

And they both knew the outcome of her tears— they would hold each other, wiping away tears and seeking warmth.

She was about to expose herself to him like a broken old sack, turning herself inside out for his inspection.

So, in a moment of panic, Ha Yue bit his wrist. She bit down so hard that blood dripped from her lips and soaked her clothes.

The amount of pain a person could endure was limited. Xue Jing had never faced such unreasonable attack in his life. Finally, in pain, he released her, and Ha Yue successfully broke free from the embrace that represented reconciliation.

It was only when she ran downstairs from the apartment building that she realized she hadn’t put on shoes or taken her bag. Her white dress was soaked in Xue Jing’s blood, and when she wiped her neck, her hand came away wet, her hair full of Xue Jing’s tears.

As for her face? It was dry and cold, like a smooth stone on the riverbank in the dry season.

That day, she didn’t meet the landlord. Instead, she was sent to the hospital by ambulance due to excessive breathing and full-body convulsions.

Everyone says that being loved is a rare happiness in this world, but the residual heat of happiness was so intense that it caused her body to go into shock from alkaline poisoning.

As the elevator doors opened, Ha Yue staggered behind Xue Jing, following him out of the elevator.

She looked drunk, leaning on him, and he had to wrap his right arm around her waist to support her weight.

The corridor was empty, even the cameras were fake. His fingers dug into the thick fabric, pressing against her ribs, able to move freely.

Today, their embrace wasn’t one of hopelessness. On the contrary, Xue Jing’s actions were frivolous and reckless, taking advantage of her vulnerability.

But despite the vulgar, romance-destroying act that Xue Jing had initiated, Ha Yue didn’t strongly resist his wrong intentions.

On the contrary, because the desire that had ignited was real, she found a simple joy in the unsteady swaying.

Her feet had been firmly planted on the ground for so long spiritually that once she felt lightheaded, she was like a kite with a broken string, out of control.

Moreover, this was just compensation, a belated apology. Xue Jing was about to leave Suicheng soon, and she welcomed this fleeting pleasure.

In the past, the happiness that was as difficult to obtain as reaching the sky had been harmful to her body. Now, the impulsive desire that was easily attainable was not. A simple bad was more appealing to her heart than a proud good.

It was just a pity that the one playing the white character hadn’t been thorough enough. When he took out the room card, Xue Jing still managed to have a moment of hesitation in his urgency. His words were directed at Hayue, but the escape route to avoid mistakes was also provided for himself.

In the elevator just now, he had already pulled out Hayue’s hair tie, and now her hair was spread out, like a crow-colored mist. He rested his chin on Hayue’s soft hair whorl, sniffing the cheap soap scent on her body, and still asked for verbal permission: “Can I take your silence as a yes?”

“Don’t make it seem like coercion. We’re not that unfamiliar. You can say no if you don’t want to. If you really can’t say it, you can also use force on me. I remember your teeth are pretty good.”