PTT - 46

Had anyone ever fed her since she became an adult? The awkwardness of the situation made her ears tingle. Yielding to Baek Si-heon’s firm demeanor, Ra-on reluctantly averted her gaze and opened her mouth.

Carefully inserting the spoon between her dry lips, he observed her expression. Her throat was severely swollen; swallowing must have been painful.

“Is it manageable? Even if it’s hard, try to eat at least half.”

“…I should. Grandma made it herself.”

She hadn’t slept properly either. Ra-on added in a low voice before opening her mouth again. Surprised by how compliant she was being, Si-heon chuckled softly and picked up another spoonful.

Ra-on fidgeted with her fingertips as she obediently accepted each spoonful like a baby bird. She had always known that Baek Si-heon—beyond being Team Leader Knox—was a kind-hearted man. But in this moment, his thoughtfulness and sensitivity stood out even more.

‘Would he do this for another woman too…?’

Though their unresolved tension lingered, a faint pang of jealousy pricked her heart like needles. Would he act the same way if another colleague fell ill?

She knew these feelings were childish and immature, but emotions rarely obey logic. Pressing her nails into her palms, Ra-on swallowed the soft porridge past her sore throat.

“…You’re a good team leader, Senior.”

“What’s with the sudden compliment?”

“Coming all the way here… feeding me porridge. I’m grateful for how much you care for the team.”

She immediately regretted blurting out her thoughts, but once spoken, words couldn’t be taken back. Perhaps her tone had been sharper than intended.

Within seconds, Ra-on coughed lightly to cover her embarrassment. Midway through scooping another spoonful, Si-heon paused and stared at her intently.

“…Why are you looking at me like that?”

Ra-on murmured quietly, averting her gaze. It felt as though her deeply buried, childish emotions had been fully exposed, making her neck flush hot. She lacked the courage to meet his deep, dark eyes directly. As she pressed hard on her palm, leaving nail marks, Si-heon raised his eyebrows with a serious expression.

“I don’t do this for everyone on the team.”

“…”

“It’s because it’s you, Yoo Ra-on, that I rushed over.”

The unexpected confession caused her pupils to waver slightly, losing their focus. Baek Si-heon set the spoon down on the bowl.

“Do you think I came here just as your team leader?”

“Isn’t that why…?”

“No. I didn’t come as Knox. I came as Baek Si-heon—the senior who used to like you.”

At those words, Ra-on slowly turned her head. It was as if she’d forgotten how to breathe. Reaching out, Si-heon cupped her feverish cheek and gazed deeply into her eyes.

“Yeon-ah, I’m upset.”

“…”

“Don’t get sick anymore.”

Even after five years, Baek Si-heon remained fundamentally the same. More mature, sharper, and seemingly perfect, yet his warm core essence hadn’t changed.

But the phrase “used to like” stuck in her mind. Despite her efforts to deny it, Ra-on still harbored feelings for him. Over time, what had once felt foreign grew stronger and deeper.

Even now, could she ask—did Senior still like her?

Perhaps she could finally voice the question she’d buried for so long. She wanted confirmation not in the past tense but in the present continuous—to know he still cared for her, despite the strained relationship caused by Jung Ah-young.

Just as Ra-on hesitated, about to speak, Baek Si-heon preempted her.

“I’m sorry.”

Startled by the sudden apology, Ra-on stared at him blankly. What exactly was he apologizing for? Gently brushing her feverish temple with his thumb, Si-heon swallowed a bitter smile.

“I went to Dian’s hospital room yesterday.”

“…Ah.”

“She can no longer work at the agency, so I wanted to say goodbye. Coincidentally, I overheard you talking to her.”

Had he heard her conversation with Ah-young? Ra-on tensed, nervously wetting her lips.

“…Did you hear everything?”

“Most of it. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but Dian’s voice was louder than I expected.”

Si-heon handed her the mug of plum tea placed beside the bowl. Made from Soon-ae’s homemade plum syrup mixed with water, it reminded him vividly of last night’s exchange between Ra-on and Ah-young.

”Yoo Sa-yeon, you ruined my life! If you hadn’t let go, this wouldn’t have happened! What am I supposed to do with this shitty life? Take responsibility, you crazy bitch!”

”What about the lives you ruined? Not just mine—there were others. People who suffered worse than I did. How will you compensate them?”

Victim. Though Ah-young claimed she was the one wronged, it was all lies. Si-heon berated himself for doubting someone he cared about based on fragmented testimonies and misunderstandings. He needed to apologize sincerely to Ra-on, who had been deeply hurt in the process. Exhaling softly, he spoke calmly.

“I shouldn’t have doubted you. I truly want to apologize. I’ve always wanted to protect you, Yeon, but it seems I’ve only caused you pain—five years ago and even now.”

“…Senior.”

“I’m not asking for forgiveness outright. But I wanted to tell you that you’re the most important person to me.”

I’m sorry for acting foolishly. Complex emotions swirled in his dark eyes. Watching him bow his head with a bitter smile, Ra-on took a sip of the plum tea. Setting the mug back on the bedside table, she placed her hand over his.

“Look at me, Senior.”

“…Okay.”

“It wasn’t that I didn’t feel resentful. But anyone could have misunderstood given the circumstances.”

To someone unaware of the full context, it might have seemed like Ra-on had unilaterally attacked Ah-young. She didn’t want to hate Baek Si-heon blindly. Admitting his mistake and sincerely seeking forgiveness felt mature enough to satisfy her.

Above all, she realized through this incident that clinging to the past would prevent her from moving forward. What mattered most wasn’t the past or the future—it was the present moment.

“So don’t make that defeated face. You’re most charming when you’re playful.”

“Like a fox?”

“Closer to a wolf. Think about how you look during sex.”

Cupping his cheeks with both hands, Ra-on lightly kissed him before pulling away. Perhaps due to her fever, his lips felt unusually cold.

Momentarily startled by the sudden kiss, Si-heon grinned slyly.

“That was barely a brush. Are we done already?”

“…You seem to forget—I’m a patient.”

“They say kissing while sick helps recovery. Want to pass it to me and get better?”

Ra-on burst into a hollow laugh at his blatant suggestion. But his shamelessness wasn’t unpleasant—in fact, it was one of the things she liked about him.

“Aren’t you being too obvious?”

“If I were subtle, you might not notice. I prefer being straightforward.”

“What if I really pass it on? We haven’t even been to the hospital yet…”

“I’d gladly take your place if I could.”

His thin lips curved into a mischievous smile. Cradling the nape of her neck with one hand, Si-heon tilted his head. Playfully nibbling her lower lip, he soon captured her soft flesh.

Each time their lips met and parted, sultry sounds tickled their ears. Ra-on closed her eyes, gripping his shoulders with both hands. Kissing him was as sweet as swallowing a handful of sugar. Despite not wanting to pass on her fever, she couldn’t pull away.

Tick, tick, tick. The second hand of the clock on the wall moved steadily.