Chapter 37

Moonlit Night, Spring Flowers

I thought I was going to die, but to my surprise, I woke up. However, the pain in my body was just as bad as before, as if I had just been pulled out of hell.

What scared me the most was the dream I had before I woke up. Ten years ago, I had a similar dream, a hazy and immoral one. This time, the dream was much more terrifying.

In the dream, I was on the verge of death, and my Master carried me back. He discussed something with Ling Yin Shenjun for a long time, then stayed in the room alone, undid the silver hook, lowered the curtains, and untied my already tattered clothes. Without warning, a searing pain spread through my limbs, mixed with the pain of my previous injuries, and I couldn’t help but cry out in pain. His eyes were as deep as night, and he stared at me for a long time, as if observing my reaction. When I calmed down a little, he suppressed a gasp, and then...

I didn’t dare to think about what happened next. I only knew that the pain in my body gradually disappeared, replaced by a wave of divine power flowing through my body. My spiritual essence gradually recovered, but I was too tired and soon fell asleep.

Of course, compared to the wounds left by the fiery glutton, the pain my Master caused me was insignificant. However, I knew deep down that what had happened between us was inappropriate for a master and disciple. Thankfully, it was just a dream. If it had been real, it would have been terrifying. Thinking about it, I couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief. I stretched out my weak arm and wiped the sweat from my forehead with the back of my hand. But when I moved my arm, I accidentally moved my leg.

A sharp pain shot through my body, and I gasped. With great courage, I slowly lifted the covers. I was indeed naked, and the unusual discomfort from my waist to my legs was real. When I sniffed the pillow, the familiar yet strange scent confirmed it.

From my scalp to my fingertips, I felt numb. My hands involuntarily clenched into fists. All of this was real. I thought about it again, and I was more sober than ever. Although I had never experienced it before, I understood what had happened between my Master and me. Thinking about it, I felt like I was about to collapse. I put on my clothes and jumped out of the jade bed, wanting to rush out and ask for an explanation, but my legs were weak, and I fell to my knees.

I fell hard and fast, and instinctively reached out to grab something. I accidentally pulled down the fox fur embroidered tablecloth, and the teacups and vases also fell to the ground. I supported myself and tried to get up, but I found that I was in my old room in Cangying Mansion. All the furnishings were exactly the same as ten years ago.

At that moment, the door was pushed open. Ling Yin Shenjun walked in with two maidservants and ordered them to help me back to bed.

Ling Yin Shenjun said with concern, “Luo Wei, your spiritual essence has not fully recovered, so don’t move around too much.”

I asked, “Where is Master? Where did he go?”

Ling Yin Shenjun hesitated, “He guessed that you might not want to see him right now, so he’s waiting outside.”

“Please ask him to come in.”

Ling Yin Shenjun hesitated for a moment, then walked out. After a while, the two maidservants were also called out, and Yinze walked in and sat on the edge of the bed, saying, “Wei’er, are you feeling better?” His voice was cold and calm, as if nothing had happened.

It was I who had asked to see him, and he was the one who had avoided seeing me, but when he was sitting in front of me, I dared not look directly into his eyes. I just clenched the bedsheets and lowered my head, “Thank you, Master, for saving my life.”

“You won’t blame me, will you?”

“No, I won’t. I overheard part of your conversation with Ling Yin Shenjun. Master forced himself to do this to save me.”

“I’m glad you understand.”

Someone who had almost died and was miraculously saved shouldn’t complain. Besides, when my Master did it, he had been very careful and had only done what was necessary. He genuinely wanted to save me. At this moment, if I felt wronged, it would be too much. However, even though I could control my tears, I couldn’t control my heartache.

I said, “I understand, Master.”

Yinze took my wrist and lightly tapped it with his fingertips. A red light flashed and flowed to my shoulder. Yinze said, “The fire damage to your spiritual essence hasn’t completely disappeared. If you ignore it, it will flare up again within a month. I’m afraid you’ll have to stay with me for a while.”

“What?” I asked in disbelief.

“There are a few other water spirit gods who can save you, and you can choose them.”

“No, no.” I shook my head desperately. “Mas... Master is fine.”

“Don’t worry, only Ling Yin and I know about this. To protect your reputation, I will order him not to say a word. In the future, you don’t have to worry about rumors.”

I lowered my head even further, and the pain in my heart instantly spread to my back and legs.

“Or, I can take responsibility.”

When I heard this, I was stunned for a moment, then I wanted to die. I was almost on the verge of death, and Ling Yin Shenjun asked him if he liked me, and he clearly said “no”, obviously he had no feelings for me, but now he was taking on such a big responsibility for this matter, which was really unlucky.

I didn’t dare to look at him, and I shook my head again, “Master is saving me, and I dare not have any other thoughts.”

After a long silence, he suddenly chuckled, “If it were another woman, she would probably nod and agree. My little water spirit disciple is still as straightforward as ever.”

Was it meaningful to humiliate me? Now, whether I was injured or sad, it was me who was suffering, what did it have to do with him? If I could, I would also want to marry the person I loved, but since it was unrequited love, why force myself to lower my dignity.

However, against my better judgment, I wanted to know what he was thinking. Even though there was a 90% chance that I would be heartbroken, I took a deep breath and asked, “Why do you want to take responsibility, Master?” No matter what, I couldn’t say the words, “Do you have a little bit of feelings for me?”

Yinze said, “It is only natural for a man to take responsibility for a woman’s first night.”

Hearing this answer, I couldn’t help but feel cold. But I still forced a smile and said, “There’s no need. Someone who truly loves me won’t care about such things. Besides, I think Master and Qing Wu Shennv are a perfect match. I don’t want to break up your relationship.”

“Since that’s the case, then I won’t worry about it. Take good care of your body. Come to my chamber tomorrow night.” He patted my shoulder and stood up, “If you feel unwell, you can come the day after tomorrow.”

As soon as he left, the smile on my face faded. I buried my head in the pillow and didn’t make a sound, but soon, the pillow was soaked with tears.

Not long after, a heavy rain fell on the Azure Dragon Heaven, turning the plains into rivers and the mountains into seas. Even the travelers at the inn felt sadder than usual. When my brother heard that I was awake, he came to my room. He put away his umbrella and walked over with a bowl of meat soup, “Weiwei, I didn’t expect you to wake up so soon. How are you feeling now?”

I felt guilty and said, “I’m just a little tired.”

He sat down on the bed and stirred the soup with a spoon. “You need to rest well. Master is very skilled. He managed to save you from that state.”

It seemed that everything was as my Master had said. No one else knew what had happened, and even my brother didn’t suspect anything. He scooped up a spoonful of soup and brought it to my mouth. I lowered my head and took a sip. It tasted pretty good, but it was a little strange. It was slightly sweet, like duck meat, but also like beef, and a little bit like game.

I pursed my lips and said, “What kind of meat is this? Why can’t I tell?”

“It’s glutton meat.”

I almost spit the soup in his face. “Glutton? You mean that fiery glutton?”

“Yes,” my brother scooped up a spoonful of soup and took a sip himself. “It tastes pretty good, but it could use a bit more sugar.”

My body was already feeling unwell, and now I felt like I was going to vomit. Even if he told me that the soup was made of Xuan Yue’s meat, I wouldn’t feel any worse. I leaned against the wall and said, “Wait, you actually cooked that glutton? Does Master know? That was his precious pet!”

Fu Chenzhi said, “That’s what Master meant. He said the glutton was disobedient, so it was better to just cook it. The Four凶[Xiōng] (mythical beasts) might sound ferocious, but their entire bodies are full of medicinal properties. The meat can replenish blood, the tendons can strengthen bones, and eating its brain can prolong life. The bones have been ground into powder to make pills. Even the horns and hooves can be sold for a high price on the market.”

I shook my head repeatedly, “Forget it, I won’t eat it. You can eat it if you like.”

“No, you have to eat.”

“No, I won’t.”

“Weiwei, why won’t you listen to your brother?”

“No, it’s disgusting.”

We argued about whether or not to eat it for over half an hour. In the end, my brother couldn’t persuade me, so he added some sugar and drank it himself. He stayed with me for a while longer, then he was about to leave me to rest quietly. However, I grabbed his clothes and asked him to stay with me a little longer. I rarely acted so clingy, and my brother seemed to be very happy. He stayed and chatted with me for a long time.

At dinner time, he brought me my meal and sat beside me, keeping me company until I fell asleep. Despite this, I couldn’t sleep well. In the middle of the night, a heavy rain storm woke me up with loud thunder.

In Cangying Mansion, the wind howled and rain lashed against the window lattice. For the first time in my life, I was so afraid of sleeping alone in a bed. The thought of what I would have to do with my master made it impossible for me to sleep. I knew I didn’t want to refuse, but I was afraid I couldn’t bear it.

So, the next day, instead of going to see my master, I spent the whole day with my brother, trying to delay things. As dusk fell, I wanted to have dinner in my room with my brother again, but Ling Yin Shenjun knocked on the door and said he wanted to talk to me alone, so he took my brother out.

As soon as my brother left, Ling Yin Shenjun closed the door and said, “Luo Wei, what you’re doing is very wrong. Do you think you’re being fair to your master?”

I was so confused by his question that I looked at him bewildered. Ling Yin Shenjun said, “You’ve just shared a bed with your master, and now you’re avoiding him and having another man stay with you in your room. That’s just not right. Your master knows about this, you know.”

I felt my face flush, but I still smiled and waved my hand, “Brother is not just any other man. Master was just treating my injuries, there was no intimacy, you’re thinking too much.”

Ling Yin Shenjun sighed, “I’m afraid only you think there’s no intimacy. Oh well, do whatever you want. But since you’re already the master’s woman, don’t treat yourself as his disciple anymore. Don’t have too many entanglements with other men. Your master doesn’t like too noisy girls. Be obedient, and you can stay by his side for a longer time.”

He didn’t even give me a chance to refute him, and he left the room. After hearing what he said, I felt even more depressed. In the past, I often helped my master take care of his various flowers and plants, and although I would comfort them and feel sorry for them, I never aspired to be like them.

Compared to a brief affair, I would rather be his obedient disciple for a lifetime. But now, I didn’t even have a choice, and I was placed in the same category as them?

Another sleepless night passed, and finally, on the third day, I couldn’t delay any longer.

Under a clear moon, I walked towards my master’s chamber. The purple stone steps extended to the moon, outlining the solitary silhouette of my master’s magnificent hall. A tree full of jujube flowers was in full bloom, and the White Emperor Mountain was looming in the north. Holding a lotus lantern, I stepped onto the stairs, my silk skirt trailing behind me, and I tiptoed to the door and knocked. The door opened almost immediately.

Usually, my master would call me inside, but this time, he came to open the door himself. I gripped the silver handle of the lantern tightly, my voice trembling as I said, “I’ve come to see you, Master.”

It was late at night, but he was still dressed neatly. The moonlight illuminated his face like jade, and his water-patterned robe was filled with indigo light. He gestured for me to come in, but didn’t say anything else. He returned to the table, closed a book that was upside down, and put it back in the bookcase. He was always picky about the decorations in his chamber, and he must have recently bought the pot of Tianliu bamboo by the window.

The bed was at the end of the room, with curtains hanging on both sides. A small table in the middle held some wine. Seeing him move the things on the bed, my palms were sweating, and I couldn’t even hold the lantern.

“Come here,” my master said.

I replied in a barely audible voice, “Yes,” and then extinguished the lantern. I walked over to him in small steps. My master turned around, reached out and brushed my hair aside, then gently kissed my cheek.

I was so shocked that I shrank my neck and quickly said, “I’m sorry, I... I don’t know what to do...”

“It’s okay, relax,” he said. “I’m here, you don’t have to think too much.”

Feeling my shoulder exposed to the air, and remembering what Ling Yin Shenjun had said, my eyes welled up. I said, “Master, will I still be your disciple after tonight?”

He was stunned for a moment, “What do you mean?”

“Ling Yin Shenjun said that after sharing a bed with you, I would have to consider myself your woman, and I couldn’t be your disciple anymore. But this was just to treat my injuries. It doesn’t mean I have any intentions to disrespect you.”

He was silent for a long time, then said, “Wei’er, I treat you like family. No matter what happens, our master-disciple relationship will remain unchanged.”

I didn’t want to change it. Compared to a few months of fleeting sweetness, I wanted to be his disciple for a lifetime. If I could go back ten years, when my master still liked me, that would be great... I said, “Thank you, Master. I can never repay my master’s kindness. Even if I become a cow or a horse in my next life, I will repay you.”

“There’s no need,” he picked up my robe again and put it on my shoulders. Seeing my puzzled expression, he said calmly, “We don’t have to take off our clothes for this. Just keep your clothes on, and you’ll feel more comfortable.”

For someone as taciturn and cold as him, this was already an extremely gentle gesture. From beginning to end, he was more restrained than the first time, and he didn’t even touch my face. He just pressed me down on the bed and finished quickly and forcefully.

Although only that part of my body was touched, my back and brain were numb. Even after it was over, he helped me tidy up my almost undisturbed clothes, but I closed my eyes and tried to return to normal, my heart was still beating wildly, and the intense numbness only increased. I could only bury my face in the pillow and painfully suppress my breathing. The mental pain I was suffering was no less than the torture of the fiery glutton.

Who would have thought that my first experience would be so bitter?

As for my master, he seemed much calmer. From beginning to end, he maintained a polite and gentlemanly demeanor. After it was over, he sat at the table and read a book.

When I had recovered, I got out of bed, lit the lantern again, and bowed to him, “Thank you, Master. I’ll take my leave now. Please get some rest, Master.”

“Go,” he said without looking up, “Come back in four days.”

The following four days felt like an eternity. Although my spiritual essence was gradually recovering, my heart was broken. No matter what I did, saw, or heard, my master’s image lingered in my mind. I desperately wanted to see him, but at the same time, I was more afraid of seeing him than ever before. Whenever I accidentally bumped into him, I would be distracted for the whole day.

Because the time was so unbearable, I even asked my brother to go out shopping with me and play around the Tian Shi City. But when the fourth day finally arrived, I was still afraid to face my master.

I originally thought that this was the third time, and I should be somewhat used to it. Unexpectedly, I was even more nervous this time when I saw him. This time, he didn’t make me lie down, he just sat on the edge of the bed and held me in his arms. The moonlight fell into the fairy pavilion, and his face was illuminated so clearly that the pain was even more unbearable.

I grabbed his shoulders and bit my lip until it almost bled. I don’t know if I was mistaken, but I felt that my master’s attitude was getting colder and colder. Finally, I couldn’t bear it anymore, “Mas... Master... can you... go slower?”

“Where did you go this afternoon?”

“I went shopping with my brother... I bought two bonsai trees...”

Later, he didn’t say another word.

This time, the lovemaking didn’t last long. After finishing the necessary treatment, he ended it decisively and told me to come back to him in seven days. But unlike last time, this time I was in so much pain that I couldn’t leave my room all day.