PTT - 73

At this moment, Ra-on felt as though she were dreaming. Was she really going to fly with him to see the sea? The surreal sensation made her pat her cheeks repeatedly, but it didn’t feel any less real. After staring at the itinerary for what felt like an eternity, she nodded with a heart full of gratitude.

“Of course I love it… Thank you, Senior. You remembered my birthday when even I had forgotten…”

“It’s the one day that comes once a year—it’s only natural to remember.”

His voice was tender as he whispered, pulling her into an embrace. The scent of wine mingled with her body wash. A selfish desire welled up within her—she never wanted this moment to end.

Ra-on, too, found it hard to say goodbye. Though she would see him again at work in ten hours, tonight felt particularly difficult to part ways. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she let out a languid smile.

Just then, an inexplicable chill crept up her spine. What was this? Her instincts, honed through years of fieldwork, were sending her a warning. Exactly three seconds later, she gasped and pulled away from Si-heon. The back of her neck was damp with cold sweat.

“Sanyeona…?”

“Oh! Grandma. Why are you up? It’s so late…”

“I was taking out the trash… Leaving fruit peels around attracts flies, you know. But who were you hugging just now?”

Without warning, the entrance door opened, revealing Soon-ae. Hearing her voice from behind, Si-heon tensed and turned his head. How could he have anticipated her grandmother appearing at this exact moment? Holding a yellow food waste bag, Soon-ae squinted as if trying to recall something distant.

“That face… I’ve seen it somewhere before. Who is it again?”

“Ah, Grandma. Um… Don’t you remember? He’s the senior from work who visited when I was sick.”

“Oh! That young man, right? My memory’s been slipping lately—I didn’t recognize you. Did you come to take our girl home?”

“Hello, Grandma. Yes, Ra-on had a bit to drink tonight, so I accompanied her.”

“Drink?!”

The word “drink” made Soon-ae’s jaw drop. At the same time, Si-heon realized he had misspoken.

“You little rascal! Didn’t I tell you not to drink and wander around? With all those drunken fools out there, how can you go gallivanting around like this?”

“Ah! Grandma…”

“Grandma, please calm down! We just had a meal with colleagues and shared a drink or two. She didn’t drink much, so don’t worry too much.”

“Even so, drinking late at night isn’t good. Phew, I’m relieved you were here, Young Master. Truly, your presence puts my mind at ease.”

Soon-ae patted Ra-on’s back gently, sighing deeply. She had raised her granddaughter with utmost care since childhood. The thought of something bad happening to her precious Yeon-ah was unbearable. Rubbing her shoulder as if in pain, Ra-on muttered under her breath.

“This person is the most dangerous one out there…”

“Yeon? Shh, don’t say things like that.”

“What? Dangerous, you say?”

Every night they spent together, he acted like a starving beast tormenting her. Ra-on shot an awkward glance at Si-heon before brushing her hair behind her ear.

“Grandma worked so hard to raise me, and this man might soon snatch me away. Be careful.”

“Yeon-ah… You’re making Grandma misunderstand.”

“What nonsense is this? Speak clearly, will you?”

Confused, Soon-ae looked between the two. Smirking faintly, Ra-on took the food waste bag from her grandmother’s hand.

“I’ll explain later. Let’s take this out first and head upstairs.”

“Oh dear, look at me. Then, Young Master, please be safe on your way home. Thank you for bringing our girl back. Do visit us again sometime.”

“Yes, Grandma. I’ll definitely stop by again. Until then, take care. Yeon-ah, you go inside too. See you at work tomorrow.”

With a soft farewell, he waved at Ra-on. Walking alongside Soon-ae toward the recycling bin, Ra-on glanced at Si-heon’s car still parked outside. Her heart continued to flutter softly.

---

After a hot shower, Ra-on stretched and returned to her room. While she had been washing up, Soon-ae must have left a jar of honey water on her desk. Taking a sip, the sweetness was almost overwhelming, seeping into every corner of her mouth.

“Wow, it’s too sweet…”

Shaking slightly, Ra-on finished the drink and picked up the envelope containing the letter. The thought of traveling alone with Si-heon next week still felt unreal, filling her with excitement she couldn’t contain.

Leaning against the headboard, she pulled the blanket over herself. Her legs disappeared beneath the navy-blue quilt.

“How romantic… Writing a letter like this…”

In an era where messages could be typed and sent instantly via mobile, most people had grown accustomed to digital communication, often forgetting the charm of analog. Carefully removing the Scotch tape from the envelope, Ra-on gently unfolded the letter.

As she prepared to read, her stomach twisted nervously. Like meeting a beloved singer in person and feeling the urge to run away, her heart raced at the thought of reading Si-heon’s words.

Calm down, Yoo Ra-on. It’s not a classified report—it’s just a birthday letter. There probably wasn’t much written inside.

“Let’s see…”

With slight apprehension, Ra-on unfolded the paper. Contrary to her expectations, the letter was densely filled with Baek Si-heon’s handwriting. His sharp, elongated strokes carried an air of maturity. Licking her dry lips, she began reading from the first line.

“To the one I want to savor endlessly…”

Her dark eyes traced the neatly connected sentences. An indescribable wave of emotion stirred her heart.

I spent countless idle hours in the hospital room pondering how to begin this letter. Outside the window, pink buds were blooming on the trees. This spring, the first we’ve shared together, feels so warm and comforting—I’m grateful.

Yeon-ah.

When I faced you on that hotel rooftop, I was overcome with a strange emotion. Though I knew it was part of the mission, I found myself reflecting deeply on our relationship. What does Yoo Ra-on mean to Baek Si-heon, and vice versa? One thing was certain: the feelings were too delicate and complex to define with simple words.

At the moment I pointed the gun at my own heart, I inevitably realized something. Even if I were to die in your hands, I wouldn’t blame you. When you asked if I trusted you, I couldn’t answer. My affection for you surpasses mere trust.

It occurred to me—perhaps your name, “Yeon,” symbolizes the connection (緣) between us. Knowing the weight of the words “I love you,” I wanted to say them at the most precious moment. But now, I can no longer hold back.

I love you, Yeon-ah. Even giving you everything I have wouldn’t be enough.

I deeply regret the twenty-six birthdays we couldn’t share. What kind of face did you wear each spring in the past? Still, the thought of being by your side in every moment to come fills me with joy. Spring, summer, autumn, winter—I’ll show you only the most beautiful landscapes with each changing season.

Happy birthday. Thank you for being born.

A single tear slid down her cheek, landing on the letter. The last character of “Baek Si-heon” blurred transparently. Tick-tock, the second hand of the clock on the wall continued its relentless march forward. She wished to freeze this moment forever, but the unstoppable flow of time felt bitterly cruel.

“I love you…”

Finally bowing her head, tears fell silently. Yoo Ra-on no longer knew how to live without him. The overwhelming happiness stung her chest.

I love you, I love you. Whispering the three syllables she had hidden in her heart for so long, Ra-on buried her face in her palms.

There were days when she believed being born was a sin. Abandoned by the mother who bore her after ten months of pain, moments of solitary tears replayed like a panorama across her mind.

How foolish such self-blame had been. The words “thank you for being born” shimmered in her eyes. For a long while, Ra-on couldn’t stop crying.

Outside the window, the moon shone unusually bright. It was a rare full moon.