Chapter 1

Preface

For me, the easiest things to control, in order, are: weight, material desires, and time. The hardest things to control are unnecessary stress and perfectionism—the former caused by the latter. Often, failing at something by just a little leaves me feeling at rock bottom, as though my life has ended, prompting me to write a thousand-word self-reflection and then lose sleep. Yet, I still get up at six the next morning.

In short, I find all desires fairly easy to control, except for the desire for control itself, which I cannot rein in. I’ve considered quitting my need for control, but then I think that without it, I might fail to control my other desires. So, I gave up on the idea. Human nature is a paradoxical concept; strengths and weaknesses always go hand in hand. You can’t develop a strength without it bringing along some flaws, and vice versa. This is what I contemplated the most while writing The Rose in the Mirror. 

Since childhood, I’ve been a fan of Michael Jackson. His music has inspired much of my writing. The inspiration for The Rose in the Mirror came from his soul-stirring song, Man in the Mirror, which contains the following lyrics:

I’m starting with the man in the mirror  

I’m asking him to change his ways  

And no message could have been any clearer  

If you wanna make the world a better place  

Take a look at yourself, and then make a change  

This song resonates deeply with my beliefs. I’ve always had a personal creed: when faced with any problem or difficulty, the first person to examine is yourself. The Chinese saying is, “Be strict with yourself and lenient with others.” Thus, I created a story around the theme of mirrors and those who gaze into them, weaving it into the romantic tale of The Rose in the Mirror.

Among my modern works, Summer Dream Rhapsody is artistic and idealistic, and Fortress of Longing tells a story of ten years of unforgettable yearning. But the period during which I wrote The Rose in the Mirror was one where I was exploring life planning and self-improvement. For long-time readers, aside from the familiar style and the eternally romantic love plots (laughs), you may also notice some differences from my previous works.

When people praise someone for being smart, they often use the phrase “high IQ and EQ” (intelligence and emotional quotients). These concepts sound broad but are fascinating in practice. Because writing requires observation of life and reflection on human nature, I’ve noticed a recurring pattern over time: people with high IQs often have shortcomings in interpersonal matters, while those with high EQs may fall short in areas of talent or skill. Individuals who possess both qualities are rare gems. If such people remain steadfast in their beliefs and put in the effort, they will inevitably rise to prominence, even in difficult circumstances. This realization inspired the two protagonists in The Rose in the Mirror, who are archetypes of high emotional intelligence and high intellectual intelligence, respectively. 

Luo Wei is gentle and perceptive, skilled at reading people and understanding their needs. She is well-liked by everyone, both male and female friends alike. However, her warmth also makes her talents appear too “approachable,” lacking distinction (a complete contrast to Pei Shi in Summer Dream Rhapsody). In contrast, Xin Qi was born with great advantages: beauty, wealth, and talent. She leads a life many girls aspire to, yet her inner world is deeply insecure. Her personality is aggressive, with a strong sense of entitlement.

Human personalities are inherently dual-sided, much like the contrast between scenes inside and outside a mirror. Free-spirited individuals often lack responsibility, while responsible ones tend to be rigid and controlling. People with strong loyalty often have a knack for harsh truths, while those who lavish excessive praise often lack loyalty. Those with good social skills often don’t have the energy to excel in professional fields, while experts in their fields may tend to be reclusive. People with sharp insights can come across as overly critical, while those who are overly accommodating may lack competence. In this vast and varied world, no one is perfect. Any prominent strength a person has is always accompanied by a shadowy weakness. Conversely, you could also say that every apparent flaw in a person hides an unnoticed strength. For instance, someone loud and annoying may also be simple and guileless; someone who constantly boasts about themselves may also generously share their success; someone nagging and fussy may also be incredibly thoughtful and attentive in life.

I often receive letters from student readers who tell me they dislike their current selves, feel like they can’t do anything right, and want to become strong individuals. My usual reply is: “You don’t like yourself because you’re still young. A few years from now, you’ll find yourself loving who you are.” As we grow older, we come to realize that the things that once upset us and the flaws that once troubled us can all be reframed into something beautiful when reflected in the mirror of wisdom.

This is also the theme of The Rose in the Mirror.

After completing the manuscript, I gave the book a precise description: this is the story that comes closest to being a fairy tale among all my works. At the same time, I hope it allows you to feel that longing to become a better version of yourself.

Finally, let me use a passage from the last chapter of the book as its preface:

“They finally understood that surpassing others is meaningless. Because, apart from oneself, no one truly knows what kind of life a person is living. Many wear triumphant smiles that conceal their tears, while others, who appear ordinary or down and out, do not wallow in self-pity and have hearts full of sunshine. 

Other people’s lives are, in the end, just a mirror.

If you can ensure that you are better today than you were yesterday, today is a successful day. And if you know there will be new goals tomorrow, the sky will remain bright even after the sun sets.

Some may take a very long time to realize that the most beautiful scenery is the rose itself reflected in the mirror.”

—Junzi Yize  

October 13, 2015, New York