WNST - 129

When Xie Queshan stepped out of the government office, he noticed a young woman pacing back and forth near the stone lion outside. 

Hearing approaching footsteps, Nanyi looked up. Seeing him, she immediately ran over, her face filled with concern as she carefully studied his expression. 

“You’ve heard?” 

Xie Queshan nodded. 

Though his demeanor appeared calm, Nanyi felt an overwhelming sadness. The calmer he seemed, the more emotions he must be swallowing alone. 

Any words of comfort she could offer felt hollow and powerless. 

“Then let’s go home.” 

“All right.” 

Xie Queshan casually took her hand and began walking along the streets. 

They walked in silence. 

Nanyi racked her brain for a topic to lighten the mood, but before she could speak, Xie Queshan broke the silence. 

“It’s been twelve years already.” 

Nanyi was startled: “Twelve years of what?” 

“The time I’ve known my teacher.” 

It spanned his entire formative years. 

Nanyi remembered Xie Xiao Liu mentioning once that during Xie Queshan’s escape from Lanzhou to Lidu Prefecture with his mother, they had received help from Shen Zhizhong, after which Xie Queshan joined his ranks. 

“How exactly did Lord Shen help you back then?” 

Xie Queshan recalled the past: “After I killed the bandits who tried to take advantage of my mother, we fled to a nearby town. The town was hunting down outlaws, and when the soldiers saw me covered in blood, they arrested me without question, planning to execute me alongside the real criminals.” 

Nanyi grew tense: “What did you do?” 

“What could I do? Kneel and plead my innocence. But there were so many wrongfully accused people, true or false—it was too much trouble for the officials to investigate thoroughly. By chance, on that day, Teacher happened to pass through the area. He glanced at me and said, ‘This boy doesn’t look like he’s pretending. Bring him over so I can question him.’” 

“Lord Shen truly had sharp eyes!” Nanyi exclaimed. 

Xie Queshan smiled faintly: “His judgment was keen, and he acted decisively. With just a few questions, he cleared my case. He immediately reprimanded the county magistrate for negligence and even awarded me merit for suppressing bandits, giving me enough funds to bring my mother home with dignity.” 

“But by then, my mother and I had been wandering for half a year. I harbored resentment and didn’t want to return home. Yet my mother was eager to go back, and I couldn’t find a good excuse to refuse.” 

“So you decided to seek refuge under Lord Shen?” 

“Of course I wanted to. At that time, Teacher seemed like a god descended from heaven, radiating the aura of a sage. In a fit of impulsiveness, I went to him and expressed my desire to follow him. But Teacher rejected me then. Knowing I was a junior member of the Xie family, he simply told me to return home first and deal with things later. Had he not rejected me, I might not have been so determined. But because he did, I became stubborn, thinking he held prejudice against me as a useless illegitimate son of a noble family. Determined to prove him wrong, I followed him all the way to the military camp.”

“You’ve always been stubborn, even as a child—so Lord Shen agreed to take you in?” 

“Teacher said, ‘If you can withstand three of my moves, I’ll accept you.’ I thought to myself—three moves? That’s easy! I had single-handedly taken down an entire bandit den. This old man might have been good with words, but his martial skills were probably nothing special—” 

The confident young boy flamboyantly demonstrated an opening stance, only for Shen Zhizhong to flip him onto the ground with a single countermove. 

The boy didn’t even see how he had been struck before he landed face-first in the dirt like a dog gnawing mud. 

“Later, I obediently returned home. Only when I was confident enough to withstand Teacher’s three moves did I go back to him. Much later, Teacher finally told me why he hadn’t accepted me the first time—he said that the military camp wasn’t a place to escape to; it was a place to serve the nation.” 

Nanyi suddenly began to understand why Xie Queshan had accepted his teacher’s death so calmly. 

Their understanding of death was deeply intertwined. In this journey through the darkest nights, life was fragile, and they had long since come to terms with its fragility. By preparing themselves to lose everything—including themselves and their companions—they had hardened their resolve. 

Xie Queshan rubbed his nose, feeling an inexplicable ache. He looked toward the distance, where the overcast sky swallowed the sunset without a sound. 

He muttered softly to himself: “Such an incredible old man… never even praised me once.” 

Hearing these murmured words, Nanyi nearly broke into tears. She sniffed hard, unwilling to add to his sorrow at this moment. 

They kept walking. The road home felt endless, the streets both bustling and desolate. Through fragments of conversation, she glimpsed moments from his youth—the beliefs that had sustained him. A single word from his teacher, a plan fraught with uncertainty and no turning back, and he had thrown himself into it wholeheartedly. Slowly, he had become the embodiment of those very beliefs. 

Perhaps this was the legacy between teacher and student. 

After walking for a long time, Nanyi came back to her senses and realized they were nearing Wangxue Lodge—but Xie Queshan still hadn’t let go of her hand. 

“We’re almost home.” 

“Mm.” He seemed lost in thought, not fully registering what Nanyi had said. 

Suddenly, Nanyi stopped in her tracks. Xie Queshan took two more steps forward before realizing she had paused. He turned to look at her quizzically, then followed her gaze. 

Xie Jun and Lu Jinxiu had just stepped down from their carriage after returning from offering incense at Dajue Temple. They were heading home in the evening when, upon reaching the gate, they saw Xie Queshan and Nanyi holding hands. 

The expressions on their faces were as colorful as spilled paint. 

Nanyi panicked and tried to pull her hand away, but Xie Queshan held it firmly. 

Xie Queshan greeted them calmly: “Father, Aunt.” 

Xie Jun was so shocked he could barely form words: “You... you two... this...” 

“You two really—” Lu Jinxiu pointed tremblingly at them, her voice rising in disbelief. 

“I was planning to find the right moment to tell you, Father, but now there’s no need to hide it. My relationship with Nanyi is exactly what you see. I will marry her.” 

These words left Xie Jun shaking uncontrollably, while Nanyi’s jaw nearly dropped. 

She knew their relationship was complicated by societal ethics and would be difficult to navigate. She had assumed they would need time to gradually gain the family’s acceptance. She never expected Xie Queshan to declare it outright. 

“Absurd! Utterly absurd!” Xie Jun pulled Xie Queshan inside, frantically signaling the servants to close the gates, fearing prying eyes outside. 

Once the gates were shut, he seemed to breathe slightly easier. 

“I’ll pretend this was all a momentary lapse of judgment! Cut ties where necessary, settle what needs to be settled—this incident never happened.” 

With Xie Jun now on her side, Lu Jinxiu finally felt vindicated for past grievances. Pointing at Nanyi, she cursed loudly: “This woman is a seductress! She must be driven out!” 

“Try laying a hand on her,” Xie Queshan shot back coldly. 

Lu Jinxiu fell silent and hid behind Xie Jun. 

“At a time like this, with rumors swirling everywhere, do you want to add another scandalous affair to tarnish our family name? Xie Chaoyun, do you even care about your reputation anymore?” 

Though Xie Jun directed his anger at Xie Queshan, Nanyi’s face flushed red, then pale, overcome with shame. 

But Xie Queshan didn’t budge an inch. 

“Father, outsiders may not know, but surely you understand the truth about Nanyi and Elder Brother’s marriage? Besides, she is no longer a member of the Xie household. Between us, there’s no theft, no harm done—we love each other freely. What’s wrong with that?” 

“This is improper! What will people say about you?” 

Xie Queshan smiled faintly and countered: “Do you think I care?” 

That one sentence left Xie Jun speechless. Indeed, Xie Queshan had already endured being labeled a traitor, weathering public scorn with unshakable resolve. Criticism couldn’t drown him. 

Perhaps Xie Jun had never truly known his son. It was as if they hadn’t grown from the same roots, their values worlds apart. What Xie Jun revered, Xie Queshan discarded like trash. At this moment, Xie Jun had no powerful words left, nor any rods to assert paternal authority. He was old, while Xie Queshan was in his prime. In every way, Xie Jun couldn’t refute him. 

Without another word, Xie Queshan pulled Nanyi away. Servants and maids watched silently, but he remained composed, his expression unchanged. 

Nanyi hurried to keep up with his strides. Though she had often imagined a day when they could openly declare their love, she hadn’t envisioned it happening like this—through sharp words and conflict. His grip on her hand was too tight, as if declaring war. Nanyi suddenly felt a pang of sadness. 

Her teacher’s death likely meant his identity might never be cleared publicly. Even if the world misunderstood Xie Queshan, within Wangxue Lodge, she wanted his family to understand him, to offer warmth. 

She didn’t want to pour fuel onto the flames of their strained relationship. 

“Xie Queshan, don’t do this.” 

“Nanyi, this is who I am.” He stopped walking but didn’t turn to look at her.

“The things I must accomplish, I will achieve by any means necessary. The person I choose to hold onto, I won’t let go of even if it means walking through fire or climbing a mountain of blades.” 

“—I can no longer afford to be dignified.” His voice carried a faint trace of exhaustion. 

Finally, he turned to look at her, his eyes dark and quiet. 

He had once again raised his defenses. 

He had to move forward as unbreakably as before. That fleeting possibility of completeness had been erased once more—but this time was different. This time, he pulled her down with him, refusing to let go. 

Nanyi gazed at his face. There was no intense emotion, no restrained control—just him standing quietly under the lamplight, his palm still burning hot. 

She reached out, brushing her fingers along his temple, his jawline. Pushing aside the fleeting sense of shame, she belatedly understood the weight of the words he had spoken in front of his father. 

He loved her openly, without reservation. Even if that openness was shameful, despicable, and unwelcome by others. 

So what? She was his last shield in this world. 

Standing beneath the breezy corridor, she rose on her tiptoes and kissed him. 

Her heated words spilled forth, brimming with deep affection: “Then we’ll face it together.”