Chapter 19

Not everyone understands the logic of maintaining a steady level of ambiguity

Hu Xiu spent a long time tossing in bed, then crawled out to stare at the ground below her window for a long time.

The name “Diao Zhiyu” was written on the window with her breath, crooked and uneven. How could Qin Xiaoyi have such a special name!

Staying up late and being infatuated in her own home, she was the woman Qin Xiaoyi had ridden his bike home!

But she still couldn’t sleep, her nerves were as excited as if she had drunk too much coffee, each nerve drawing sketches on her brain like a blank piece of paper.

She roughly outlined the shape, a beginner might sketch the features, an intermediate artist could place them precisely, but the most difficult part was filling in the texture of the character.

It wasn’t something that could be finished by just sketching with a pencil. Where the mole was, the reason behind the tear lines, how the years had marked their body and changed their face—all these were accumulated over time, every inch with its special meaning.

Just like the tactile feeling in Li Ai’s love story, Hu Xiu secretly hoped that Qin Xiaoyi also had such a rich personality for her to discover.

From close up, Qin Xiaoyi had fair skin and delicate features, a slim face, and clear eyes, but his traits were quite different.

At the very least, the kind of personality that could break a girl’s heart, someone who understood everything but didn’t speak it out loud—Hu Xiu discovered this. He was far more complicated than she realized.

To commemorate this wonderful night, Hu Xiu posted an overly sentimental update on her social media: “Have you ever seen Shanghai at five in the morning?”

The picture was taken from the sixth floor, focused on the spot where Qin Xiaoyi had said goodbye.

She managed to sleep for two hours, then woke up to see her senior’s comment on her post: “Are you already preparing for the conference content at this hour? Thumbs up!”

The scariest part was Zhao Xiaorou, whose messages filled three screens, asking about the progress.

Hu Xiu obviously didn’t dare mention that she now knew his name too soon, or Zhao Xiaorou would probably have already planned out everything for the future, including the child’s zodiac, the postnatal care center, and the kindergarten.

She decided it was better to focus on work for now and catch up with Zhao Xiaorou later.

Besides, when she saw that Zhao Xiaorou mentioned she was going to meet a lawyer at dawn, it was clear that Zhao Xiaorou’s own matters were far from finished.

Adults need to mind their own business first.

The priority was the new conference coming up. In the two months since she joined, Hu Xiu had already attended various translation meetings: oncology forums, international rare disease volunteer conferences, and collaborations with foreign hospitals...

Each one required extensive preparation, and she couldn’t rest until the conference was over. Her favorite way to relax was to meet Qin Xiaoyi after a translation event in the Snowpiercer, and the data for this upcoming conference was as thick as professional literature:

“Stem Cells in the Treatment of Diabetes and Obesity.” And because she was eager to meet Qin Xiaoyi, she had already used her quota for this conference to visit him after it ended.

The next week would be all about focused work, and she wouldn’t get to meet Qin Xiaoyi.

Damn it! Why did she set these rules for herself! Looking at her bank card with only four digits left after paying rent and debts, she had no savings to speak of, and her entertainment budget was all used up on Qin Xiaoyi.

Hu Xiu thought again about Qin Xiaoyi telling her to save money as he rode the bike, and it suddenly seemed a bit interesting—he probably saw right through her... no money.

As long as she wasn’t interrupted by her father’s relentless phone calls, her mood would remain quite good.

After all, the last time after the meeting with Qian Jinxin, her father’s call had irritated her for several days.

It turned out that Qian Jinxin was even more infatuated with the Shanghai girl from the last time, and he told her father about their time on the Snowpiercer, framing Hu Xiu as a woman who sought attention in a murder mystery game, being frivolous and slick.

The resentment lingered until she met Qin Xiaoyi, which helped calm her down. As Zhao Xiaorou put it, it was like someone who cheated using the temporary lightness of an affair to compensate for the suffocating feeling at home.

People always need an outlet to wash away the unpleasant memories in their lives. Qin Xiaoyi, to some extent, had become a painkiller for her original family.

On the way, Hu Xiu thought, her peaceful paradise had been invaded, yet she hadn’t even gotten upset, only to be bitten back by Qian Jinxin.

She had been hanging up on her father’s recent calls, then sent him pictures from the high-level forum. As expected, the man, who admired strength, temporarily quieted down when he saw the photos, leaving only some lofty advice.

Hu Xiu had set her messages to “Do Not Disturb,” planning to ignore them and continue the joy of her one-sided love. She already knew Qin Xiaoyi’s name—was there anything else to worry about?

At 8:20 AM, her senior sister arrived at the office and quietly pulled Hu Xiu out the door.

The security exit on the second floor of the administration building often had people walking by, so it wasn’t convenient to discuss personal matters. Hu Xiu was pulled to the convenience store outside, where she accompanied her senior to buy breakfast and listen to some advice.

The hospital was a public institution, and every step had to be taken carefully. Hu Xiu had never been fond of talking much, but her married senior had an endless need to vent, often dragging her into small chats.

Against the flow of patients, her senior whispered that there was some inside information. This year, there were only two spots for permanent positions, and one had been taken by someone who had been directly transferred from a hospital in Dahuai. The remaining spot was uncertain. There was a male intern who had been at the hospital for three years, doing administrative work. He was liked by doctors and even the head nurse, making it hard for Hu Xiu to secure a permanent position.

Hu Xiu, of course, knew her senior was referring to Chen Yang, the head nurse’s favorite.

He was very efficient, having switched from a nursing bachelor’s to a master’s in Classical Chinese, and it had been awkward when he first arrived at the hospital. He could only be a bland, good person in the administrative position.

She picked up a bread and queued to pay at the convenience store, and her senior’s soy milk was almost finished. She asked, “What do you think about it?”

Hu Xiu replied calmly, “I’m okay. If I don’t get the permanent position, I can always switch to another company.”

Her senior threw the soymilk cup into the trash with a thud. “Xiao Hu, are you crazy? If you don’t get the permanent position right away, you’ll have to wait another year. Your salary won’t rise, and you won’t be able to get translation fees. You could earn tens of thousands in one session.”

Tens of thousands. If she translated for twenty sessions of Snowpiercer, Hu Xiu’s ambition flared up.

She didn’t show her emotions and just asked, “But doesn’t the head nurse and the surgery director really like Chen Yang?”

“He once helped the oncology department translate a paper, but he made a critical mistake in the pathological description.

There are a lot of these little errors. How should I put it? He doesn’t have the sharpness, always worried about gains and losses.

I really admire you. You’re so serious and energetic when you work. You’re still young and full of stamina, unlike me, who after giving birth, can’t handle a six-hour conference anymore. You’ll have to support me in the future. But…”

“But?”

“I can’t make the final call. This will depend on higher-ups. If you get recognition from one or two doctors, it’ll be more stable, because in a hospital, doctors still have more say.

And I really admire you. You sit there quietly and get things done without wasting words. How can you have such a perfect personality?”

When they reached the office door, her senior lowered her voice. “Let me just say one last thing. In the hospital, the safest thing is to have a doctor for a husband. It’s not about finding a backer. But many things, if your family has a doctor, you’ll rise faster, because people will see you as more professional and you’ll have connections within the system. Chen Yang’s girlfriend is a magazine editor. They’ve been together for seven or eight years. What’s the use? At the critical moment, she’s no help—being infatuated in a relationship doesn’t help one rise in the workplace.”

The sticky notes on her computer marked all the to-dos, and Hu Xiu quietly glanced around. Her colleagues at the hospital were much more serious and meticulous than those in advertising companies, and the atmosphere was serious. Colleagues had already settled into their routines, with baby photos or family portraits on their desks.

She also wanted to secretly post a picture of Qin Xiaoyi, but the reward photo next to it had a QR code…

She decided not to embarrass herself by letting her colleagues know about her secret obsession with the murder mystery game NPC.

Her phone vibrated; it was Zhao Xiaorou. “Come sleep at my place tonight, it’s urgent.”

On the way there, Hu Xiu seriously thought that if she caught the opportunity, she would have to put in more effort.

After all, once she got the permanent position, she could take on more interpretation work at other hospitals, earning more than 10,000 per session.

Carrying a thick stack of materials, she arrived at Zhao Xiaorou’s place by 10 PM. After Wang Guangming left Xafei Garden, the room felt a bit emptier—

Though things were still piled up, it was undeniably quieter without him, and since Zhao Xiaorou was such an anxious person, it made sense she’d call her.

Zhao Xiaorou’s face was even more beautiful than before, sculpted like a movie star, with smooth and clean contours.

She handed Hu Xiu a document. “Help me take a look at this. Wang Guangming sent it.”

Hu Xiu glanced at it. “It’s a lawyer’s letter. How could you not understand the Chinese version… Basically, it’s suing you for defamation. So, did he sue you over that Weibo post?”

“Yeah. We have a house in Shenzhen. When he moved there, he had a spot for talent settlement, and my family paid the down payment of two million. Now that we’re separating, he’s at a disadvantage. The loan is joint, and he wants to divide the house. I think his mom is also a bit much. She didn’t contribute anything when we got married, gave two red flower quilts as wedding gifts, and now she’s encouraging Wang Guangming to fight for the house. Is Shenzhen hukou really that valuable?”

“I regret not flipping over his family’s table and showing his mother my family’s ancestral teachings back then.”

“What are you going to do now?”

“File a lawsuit. Li Ai’s lawyer has taken my case. I can make more money, but I always have to fight for some dignity. I also must thank my parents for not being like your father, who likes to suppress mentally. Otherwise, I wouldn’t even have the courage to fight for the house. I’d be more than willing to hand it over to them.”

It didn’t sound like a compliment. But there was no need for Hu Xiu to argue with Zhao Xiaorou, who was in a bad mood. Instead, she bent down to get some ice cubes from the ice machine and poured some Coke: “I found out Qin Xiaoyi’s real name. It’s Diao Zhiyu, with the character ‘zhi’ meaning ‘childish’.”

Zhao Xiaorou turned her head, silent, staring at her phone, typing seriously. Only then did Hu Xiu get a bit anxious: “Did you hear what I said?”

“I heard. I’m searching for it.”

“That was fast.”

“I found it...” Zhao Xiaorou curled her legs up: “Shanghai Theatre Academy, class of 2014, majoring in Acting. Interesting, Hu Xiu. He just graduated not long ago. When you met him, he probably hadn’t even graduated yet.

Judging from his birth year, 1996, that’s really something, Hu Xiu. He’s five years younger than you, you’re really getting lucky!”

“That makes it sound like we’re in a relationship, Zhao Xiaorou. Don’t over-interpret.”

“What happened when you went to the Snowpiercer yesterday?”

“Nothing much, just waited for him to get off work. I didn’t take a taxi, just walked along the street back home. He followed me on his bike and gave me a ride home...”

“Seriously?! And you think this isn’t something? If a man has no interest in you, why would he send you home?”

“Maybe he was worried I wasn’t safe?”

“It’s three in the morning, you could be naked running around and no one would dare touch you. This is downtown Shanghai, for heaven’s sake.”

“Qin Xiaoyi’s actions show something, though. He’s being so attentive, went home to get his bike after work just to catch up with you... Wait, how did he know where you live?”

“He helped me book a taxi before...”

Zhao Xiaorou took a deep breath, her anger boiling: “What else have you been hiding from me, you two? Hu Xiu, you’ve gotten bold, not even sharing the details of your love life. Don’t you think I should be in charge here?

You’ve been hiding this much from me. How many times have you two met? Did you go upstairs? How far have you gone?”

After a long pause, Hu Xiu struggled to interject: “You and Ning Zechen make such a good match, you know.”

“I don’t care. Hu Xiu, I’ve been busy with my divorce and haven’t been taking care of you, I admit that.

But from now on, if you have any problems, you must consult me, okay? I can still clearly remember when you were kicked out of your house, though it was because of your ex and your dad.

But Qin Xiaoyi, such a young man with no stains on his record, we need to be careful. Let’s not mess this up.

If you have a relationship with him, it’ll be the kind of relationship that feels like heaven. He’s handsome too.

Who knows, by winter you two might be together. The Snowpiercer might feature a half-naked Santa Diao Zhiyu. When that happens, trust me, you can go ahead, even if it’s an accidental pregnancy...”

Hu Xiu quickly covered her mouth: “Enough of this.”

This damn mental image won’t go away! Hu Xiu shook her head vigorously, trying to change the topic. But Zhao Xiaorou wasn’t ready to give up: “Did you get his WeChat?”

“No. If they contact each other privately, their salary gets deducted, two thousand per time...”

Zhao Xiaorou rubbed the back of her neck: “You’re really naive. He was already downstairs at your building. Do you think the Snowpiercer boss would check the surveillance at your complex? You let the duck fly away when it was right in your grasp...”

Zhao Xiaorou, who only goes for direct and fast-paced actions, totally didn’t understand the joy of slow-burn romance. As Hu Xiu talked, it still felt like those times when she and Zhao Xiaorou used to chase after Korean stars at airports and hotels in Beijing. Back then, they were both “Li Donghae’s wives” and a fleeting glance from a star could fuel them for an entire night.

They’d both built up stamina back then, attending concerts despite exhaustion. They’d sleep only two hours, with dark circles hanging on their cheeks like zombies, yet still step out looking radiant with BB cream.

Zhao Xiaorou didn’t stop: “This is different from Li Donghae. That was something you couldn’t touch, but Qin Xiaoyi, he took you home after getting you a ride. That means it’s on. You can sleep with him, you can date him.

Damn, after I finish this lawsuit with Wang Guangming, I’m going to have a carefree love affair.”

“Did you call me over just for Wang Guangming? I don’t see you being that anxious,” Hu Xiu said, burping from her Coke, and then trying to suppress the thought of Qin Xiaoyi.

“Of course it’s not just about Wang Guangming.” Zhao Xiaorou furrowed her brows, stretching her legs out flat: “The lawsuit with Li Ai’s wife has been tough for two years, and the family doesn’t support him continuing it.

His lawyer told me he’s running out of money. The rent for the coffee shop is almost due, and REGARD might shut down.”