Just Add Ice
Sylvia Erdely (10-4)
March marked one year since students, staff, and faculty evacuated the Masterman building, unsure of when they might return. Abandoned of its once bustling hallways and buzzing atmosphere, the school fell dormant. As far as teachers knew, not a soul remained in the building besides the usual mice, vermin, assorted wildlife... and Calder Burke (see: Masterman School: A Home Away from Home). However, amid the madness of the last day of in-person school, one unfortunate student was left behind and locked in the building. Until now, this anonymous student’s story has been a closely-guarded secret.
This story begins on the morning of March 13, 2020 in the Masterman nurse’s office. A student lay in the back room, eyes closed and completely unresponsive. He was, in fact, in a coma. However, seeing as the comatose student had not been diagnosed with a fever, the nurse suggested that he stay at school, rest, and “just put ice on it.” At some point, the nurse took more drastic action by offering him a cup of water and a napkin of saltine crackers. Unfortunately, the crackers went stale as the nurse waited for a response.
Come that afternoon, their attention diverted from the student as pandemic chaos overtook the building. Weekly transpasses were revoked and an emergency two-week break from school was announced. Masterman had never seen a more confusing, panicked, and hectic day. Naturally, this mood carried into the nurse’s office, where everyone frantically gathered their belongings and fled the school. At the sound of the 2:28 bell, staff and students promptly poured out of the school, ready for a serendipitous two-week vacation.
All except for the lone, unconscious student, who would remain inside for another year.
Last week, the homecoming of teachers and staff to the school revived Masterman. Upon the nurse’s return, she discovered the poor student, still bedridden in the back room. She was relieved to find him accompanied by Calder Burke, who spent the year shooing away mice and singing him the Masterman hymn as a lullaby. The nurse, in a frantic attempt to wake him, resorted to the mother of all remedies: ice. After mere seconds of applying the cure-all, soggy, plastic bagged ice to his skin, the student miraculously awoke. Because of the ice, the student emerged from his coma in perfect health. Thank you, school nurses, for saving students one ice cube at a time.