NILWM - 36

“Ho-hotel?”

“Don’t misunderstand. I didn’t purposely kiss you as soon as we got in the car because of that. The truth is, I had a hotel reservation even when we met a week ago.”

“...”

“Just in case. If you had accepted my confession... and if we had started dating, I didn’t know what the atmosphere would be like.”

But that day, it had ended with just a kiss. There was no pressure to do anything more. He had even said that he would wait as long as it took until she willingly wanted to do more than kiss.

He hadn’t seemed impatient or like he was expecting something, like he had reserved a hotel. Of course, he had been quite aroused and excited.

“Then what are you going to do about the hotel...?”

Her face flushed again as she spoke. One of her hands instinctively went to her heavy lower abdomen. When she was on her period, in addition to the bleeding, she also had intermittent abdominal pain for a few days. She couldn’t even dream of having sex until it was completely over.

“It’s fine. I can just cancel it. I made the reservation on my own.”

“Senior, didn’t you say you sometimes eat and sleep at your office apartment when you’re busy? That you use the upstairs as a residential space because it’s a duplex...”

“That’s true, but I wanted the first time to be in the most romantic place possible. First memories are precious.”

Her heart sank. He casually canceled the hotel reservation on a phone app and continued to speak.

“I’ll call you to my office after I finish up some urgent end-of-year work and clean it up a bit. Since it’s a workspace, I can’t call you there often, though.”

“Okay. But, Senior, the location is fine, but when can we meet next...”

Ye-seo’s tongue stopped on its own. The front of his pants, which was near the heater, was bulging. It was completely different from his upper body, which was sitting up straight and tidy, as if he could grab the steering wheel and drive off at any moment. At that discrepancy, Ye-seo involuntarily turned her head away.

“Sorry. You made me get hard.”

Han Joo-hyuk spoke calmly, as if he had noticed her silent astonishment. He was as composed as usual, but he seemed like a different, unfamiliar person.

“I-it’s okay.”

“I feel like it’s unfair... You’re the only one who showed me everything.”

Ye-seo’s face flushed again as she remembered the raw moment from just a little while ago. She didn’t dislike what he said, but she wished he would stop talking about that topic now.

“Next time, I hope you’ll get to see every part of me, too.”

Ye-seo almost hiccupped.

“Of course, only when you’re mentally ready for it.”

“I will... be ready. Probably.”

Ye-seo answered vaguely. She didn’t know if it would be the next time or the time after that, but she hoped it would be.

She liked Han Joo-hyuk that much. From the very beginning until now. Looking back, she felt it was like that from the day she first met him. The day he was her first customer when she was working a part-time job at a cafe in front of the school before the spring semester began.

“Ye-seo, you know what?”

Before he started the engine, he grabbed one of her hands and intertwined his fingers with hers. His large, warm hand felt very pleasant.

“Do you remember the first day we met at the cafe where you worked? Around mid-February.”

Ye-seo’s heart thumped. She had just been thinking about that, too. The timing was too perfect.

“I think I’ve liked you since then.”

“Senior...”

“It was love at first sight. I just kept trying to avoid my feelings without even realizing it.”

He confessed again, as if to apologize. Ye-seo’s heart, which had been beating as fiercely as a drum, finally began to calm down a little only after they had said goodbye and she had entered her house.

She was so happy she felt like she was flying. Is it okay for me to be this happy? She was lying in bed, replaying the date in her mind, when she let out a sigh. Only then did she remember that she had forgotten to ask when they would meet next.

Ye-seo jumped up and fumbled for her phone. She was about to send him a text message but ended up lying down again. He had said he would be busy until the end of the year, so she didn’t want to rush him and put pressure on him.

• Realistically, work will often take priority over our relationship. You might feel disappointed, but I hope you don’t misunderstand.

He had asked for her understanding before they started dating. And she had responded, agreeing to understand.

Han Joo-hyuk had learned about stocks and computers since elementary school and had spent his teenage years immersed in them, and now he was running a small startup security company himself. She was a complete novice in IT, but since he had even received an offer from a major corporation, it seemed he was quite skilled in that field. No one at the school knew about it, and it seemed that no one knew except for his cousin, Park Sung-joon.

She was getting sleepy, and her eyelids were getting heavy. The answer she had given him also came back to her vaguely.

• I won’t. A relationship can’t always be the top priority. There will be times when I’m busy and can’t answer your calls, and you won’t be my number one priority either.

His eyes had changed slightly then. And he had mumbled something... What was it?

• Still, I wish I was always your...

Ye-seo’s eyes completely closed. Her head, which had been lying straight on the pillow, was slowly tilting.

But I’ll still be able to meet him on Christmas Eve, right? It’s our first Christmas since we started dating.

________________________________________

A few days later, on December 23rd, a text message arrived from him in the morning.

[Sorry. The end-of-year project keeps getting delayed, so I’m not sure if I can see you tomorrow. I’ll contact you again tonight.]

She was a little disappointed, but Ye-seo composed herself and sent a reply.

[Okay, Senior. It’s fine.]

And around midnight, another text message arrived.

[I’m working overtime now, so I’ll contact you again tomorrow morning. I’m really sorry.]

[Okay, Senior. You must be tired, so don’t worry about me and focus on your work.]

After sending the message with a brave-looking emoticon, Ye-seo plopped down on her bed. She had sent the text, but her disappointment was even greater than it had been in the morning. She was worried about what would happen if they couldn’t even meet on Christmas Eve tomorrow.

She missed her senior. She had been diligently writing her novel and studying English in her spare time, in between helping out at the pharmacy, before her part-time job was scheduled to start in January. Still, because of Han Joo-hyuk, who she thought about from time to time, she couldn’t fully concentrate.

“Ye-seo. I bought gimbap! Let’s eat quickly while there are no customers.”

Just then, the back door burst open, and Soo-min held up a plastic bag. Since it was the season for year-end parties and gatherings, thankfully, there were only customers looking for hangover cures or energy drinks.

“Okay, unnie. I’ll go make some tea in the pantry.”

Ye-seo poured water into the kettle in the tiny pantry, trying to shake off her distractions.

Snap out of it. I’ll be able to see him for at least a little while tomorrow, right? I’m sure I’ll be able to meet him.

Her mother was on a trip to the countryside for a pharmacy association meeting and a class reunion and was scheduled to return on the night of the 25th. She had originally planned to leave the pharmacy to her and Soo-min for all three days, saying they should at least sell over-the-counter medicine, but Soo-min had protested, so they were planning to close the pharmacy completely tomorrow and the day after.

• “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Pharmacist! I’m on vacation on the 24th and 25th. Then Ye-seo would have to run the pharmacy alone for two days, and you know how dangerous it is at night. Don’t you remember the drunk who broke in a few days ago, and we almost had to call the police?”

At the same time, she winked at Ye-seo and then joked when they were alone.

• “Even if you don’t have a boyfriend, it’s still Christmas. It’s really not right for you to be here alone.”

“You’ve been checking your phone constantly since earlier, are you... waiting for a message from someone?”

Soo-min asked just before she was about to open her mouth wide and put a piece of gimbap in. Ye-seo’s heart sank. Was it that obvious? She decided not to check her phone anymore.

“No, I’m not. Haha. I’m just bored.”

“What are you going to do for two days? Your friends are all meeting their boyfriends, and they’re busy with family trips and ski resorts.”

“Uh, actually...”

Ye-seo hesitated as she reached for a piece of gimbap. Soo-min, a part-time employee, was always cheerful and high-spirited, but she was good at keeping secrets.

• “Soo-min is really a strange one. You don’t usually find people who talk a lot but are good at keeping secrets, but she’s a trustworthy one. Well, that’s why I’ve kept her for so long.”

Her mother had mumbled that to herself one day. She would gossip about Soo-min being a blabbermouth and a chatterbox, but she still acknowledged her character.

“Unnie. The truth is... can you keep this a secret from my mom?”

“You’re seeing someone.”

Soo-min’s eyes lit up.

“Is it that Hermes fountain pen? What was it? Tbaldi? Tibaldi? Is it that senior?”

“What? How did you know that...?”

“You were so worried about it. You were wondering what to do because you had to return it to the senior. You said he was a male senior. Back then, I felt... something very subtle. Then, last week when I asked you what happened with the fountain pen, you said you had a good meal with him, and he didn’t say anything, which was a relief. Back then, I was like, Hmm, does she like that senior?”

“W-was it that obvious?”

“Yeah. You’re completely unable to hide the things you like. You’re the type who can’t play hard to get or keep a poker face when you’re in a relationship. You don’t show when you’re having a hard time or are upset, but you can’t hide it at all when you’re happy.”

She finished chewing her last piece of gimbap and leaned in close.

“So what’s the conclusion? Are you dating that senior?”

“Yes, that’s... what happened.”

“What’s he like? I’m so curious! So you’re meeting him on Christmas Eve, right?”

Just then, the wired phone next to the counter rang. It was her mother.