Just When I Thought it Couldn't Get any Better

https://www.dmt-nexus.me/forum/default.aspx?g=posts&t=26349

Male

I sat in the dark and held in my second hit, the vague shapes I could make out through the darkness began to change proportion and breathe, everything was covered in shimmering multi coloured glitter. The room had been dark but now a hovering, circular blue light was illuminating the room with a warm, flickering orange glow, similar to candle light. I decided to ignore the presence of this blue disc, I had to get ready for the journey before I lost the ability to do so. I could feel the onset of oblivion, so I quickly put down the bong, pulled up the duvet and closed my eyes.

It all began with the monolith, but this time it quickly changed and developed into another form. I have seen this thing before, but it is only now that I have managed to link it to the monolith. It changed firstly into a throne, this throne was spinning anti clockwise on some kind of green or blue disc. This was happening inside a brown room or enclosed environment. There were humanoid beings skirting the edge of the room, these beings weren’t like watchers, I didn’t feel that their job was to observe me, it was more like they were getting on with their day and I had been dropped into their reality. They looked at me as they rushed past, but we had no interaction, they were either too busy or not interested in me and I was left alone.

The throne slowly changed into a small castle and in the middle of the castle appeared, what I think, is some kind of intricate undulating morphing geometric insanity. This central space is becoming a running theme. I know that the thing in this space is beautifully complex and it is always bang in the middle of my vision but I can never remember what it looks like. I can remember the rest of the room quite well, but it’s as if this central space contains information I’m not allowed to bring back.

It felt like an insane fairground ride, some kind of cosmic plaything, but it was not to be ridden, it was to provide the viewer with amazement, it was like a living painting (not a sculpture), something to be enjoyed for simply what it was.

The colours of this place were incredible, everything stood out more than is imaginable, every colour perfectly opposed the one next to it, colours which I would normally describe as dark or bland, the browns and greys, were as vivid and beautiful as any other colour. There was no texture to any surface in the room, everything was perfectly smooth, smoother than smooth, almost liquid.

I watched this new improved, turbo charged monolith in awe, I was amazed at what it had turned into and could only wonder what else it could do. All of a sudden, it started to melt, it oozed from the centre, and as it did so I began to move backward. As I was moved back the oozing colours came toward me like a wave, whichever piece of this flowing fractal lava wave I looked at would burst out and become the leading point of the wave. Everywhere I looked the energy wave was full of real things, all arranged in an ever changing H.R.Giger style pulsating flow.

This flow built in speed and I felt a sudden surge in energy, I moved yet further back and up a little. I was now riding on the oozing fractal energy wave of everything, I felt like I was on some kind of boat, but not an ordinary boat, there was no structure to it, but I knew I was on some kind of vessel. I looked all around me as I sailed a wave of all matter. I looked into the wave and it was made of everything, all types of imagery would appear and morph and change, things would come out of the wave and then split and something new would burst through, this was how the wave seemed to create itself.

There were rows of cars, turning into rows of women, who would then roll and change into pyramids which in turn morphed into splits in the wave through which another wave, containing all of existence, would break. I remember thinking the reason it was so hard to explain, or even to remember these things was because everything was made up of everything, everything was the same thing. How can you possibly remember everything in existence, and if you can how do you explain it?

We were travelling at an immense speed and I felt a Viking surge of power in the air, I looked back and I couldn’t see anyone, or anything, but I knew someone was there, I could feel them, I felt the presence of a brother, but not my brother of everyday reality, a DMT brother. Suddenly, I lifted up above the fractal flow and the landscape unfolded before me. I was above a huge alien landscape, a landscape made entirely of energy, and I saw for the first time where all this energy comes from. I could see beings who I can only describe as gods. These beings seemed to be connected to nothingness, their arms and legs didn’t seem to end; they seemed to fade into the nothingness. There was a stormy feel to the place, an electrical intensity filled the air, and as I watched from my new vantage point I could see what these gods were doing. They were creating existence. They were firing what looked like electric fractal waves from their arms and this was creating the DMT environment. These are the beings that created all the experiences I have had while on my journeys.

These beings had no idea I was there, I find it hard to believe they would care about my insignificance even if they had been aware of my presence; they clearly had more important things to do. The energy that these beings were creating was the fractals and the environments that I have seen, and experienced, in my previous journeys, now instead of experiencing these places I was watching them being created. I was watching the creation of a place I can barely comprehend.

The waves of fractal energy were the most intricate and random collection of things you can imagine, these waves were made from things which appear in everyday life, except that they are the most incredible metallic colours and they ooze and move through each other like a psychedelic cloud flow.

I began to fly backwards over the landscape and gazed down upon what was being created, as I moved I could see further into the distance. These beings stretched out as far as I could see, even though it got darker the further away I looked, I could still see the electrical explosions that were formed when these beings carried out their work.

I kept moving back until I stopped on a ledge. This ledge was high up on a giant on a cliff face; I stood there and looked out at the impossible. This is the first time I have ever felt fully immersed in DMT experience, I have felt like I have been to other places but I am never aware of a body, I just exist, This time I felt that I was actually stood on the ledge in a real body, but not the body which was lying back in my bed, a new body, a hyperspace body. I was holding a staff or long walking stick and dressed as some kind of desert nomad. I had absolutely no connection with my everyday body in any way, I knew I was in this place because I had smoked DMT, and I even remember thinking that I was amazed that the amount of DMT I had smoked could create all this, but that thought was my only connection to everyday reality. I felt the wind in my face, below me I could see the flowing lava fractal river I had sailed upon and beyond the river I could see the energy fields folding in on themselves as they expanded. At this point it felt like I had been on my journey for a long time, so much had happened, I had seen so much, I can remember thinking that I never wanted it to end.

I stood and surveyed the landscape, I have no words to suitably describe its impossibly complex nature, all the ones I write in this tale fall pitifully short and I am almost embarrassed to write about it in such a personally disappointing way. During this time I was extremely lucid. I stood thinking: "how can I have had a disappointing experience at J's on Wednesday and then smoke half the amount and be gifted with being able to experience the impossible".

Normally I feel like an observer or a player in the insane game that is DMT, you play the game but you don’t know the rules, you spend your time trying to make sense of the insane. This time I didn’t have to watch or play, I had already won and I was free to enjoy my prize, I wasn’t a watcher or a player, I was a character in the game. I felt as though I was high above the normal place I would inhabit after smoking, I had ascended all the levels and I was left high on my ledge. From my ledge I understood where it all came from, the insanity I normally witnessed still made no sense but at least now I know where it comes from and how it is formed.

As I stood on my ledge I got a strange feeling inside my chest and it began to alter the landscape. I was coming to the end of my journey and I could feel excitement building in my chest as my body began to realise what was happening. As the excitement grew the intense complexity of the landscape began to fall apart, the most amazing thing I have ever witnessed was falling apart, and I was causing it. I can only liken it to the feeling I have had when trying to remain in a lucid dream, if I get excited in a lucid dream it shocks my body and I wake up. I think this is where the pre-journey meditation really came into play; I was able to concentrate on my breathing more effectively and control the excitement. I could feel a pressure in my chest created by trying to control my excitement, I held it in and I as I did so the landscape started to slow in its destruction. I was back in my body now but still very much under the influence. I continued to stay calm until the landscape was replaced by a vision of colours which started to slowly fade, the end was signalled when my weird rent monkey opened his bedroom door loudly, i was left once again in the dark in my bed.