DMT Trip Report by Ricky Tea

August 4, 2018

https://www.academia.edu/38811143/DMT_Trip_Report_by_Ricky_Tea

Not long after my first experience with DMT, I could not stop thinking about just how profound it had been. It was clear immediately afterwards that I had more questions and that I would be diving back in sometime soon.

2 days later I am home alone, it's a bright sunny day outside, and yet my mind keeps drifting to that place, of the barely remembered journey like no other. I needed to peer once again into that beautiful abyss.

I loaded up my pipe with some crystal, and primed the powder. As it melted into the wire filled stem, It's sweet smell scent of wave of pleasurable excitement and anticipation through me. It was palpable.

Once again I readied myself, pipe in hand. Even with the comforting knowledge that i will be just fine, each time i put the glass tube to my lips I had to pause and calm my accelerating heart. I try to remember the methods to regain my stillness from meditation, yet still my heart races away.

I toke once long and slow, seeing the pipe run clear. I closed my eyes and ready myself. The mandala-like flower appears in my mind's eye, undulates for a moment and quickly fades. I'm going no-where. A misfire, how frustrating. I proceed to weigh up another small pile of crystal, and consider the 60mg that some recommend to really go deep. The intrepid risk taker within me immediately agrees that this is a good idea, and I add a little more than that. Powder primed once again.

Toke one and i don't feel too much, I panic that i've burned it, that it was too soon since the misfire. Toke two and the smoke is big this time. Immediately I hear the carrier wave rising, rising. It's perfect tone much like a Tibetan singing bowl quickly gaining in intensity, incredibly clear and definite, rising, rising. It’s sound infusing the very room around me. I manage to toke again and through shooting neon lights I see the pipe once again run clear. I closed my eyes, the momentum was there, making me increasingly heavy.

The sound overwhelms me, crackling into obscurity. The flower forms once more, and from within it unfurls several spiral arms, much like a fractal octopus. Along each of these extending arms were countless versions of itself, perfectly spiralling to tiny crisp points. It moves slow, searching, before sensing me. It quickly reaches out towards me, each tentacle slicing through space, and within its volume and new level of space with seemingly endless versions of itself curled up. Its many spiraling arms begin to pierce my body, or my centre, reaching inside of me, moving quickly before abruptly slowing, finding something. It appears to make a change, some sort of adjustment.

It reverses a little, It feels as if time reverses in sync with its furling. I become aware of the part of me that is trying to fight for control. It continues to penetrate me further and deeper, making more and more adjustments, and as it did so i found myself able to relax further and allow myself to submit to the procedure. I was in safe hands and I knew what I wanted, I let it flow. I exhaled. The fractal flower octopus that was once an object in front of me was now within and part of me. Instead of looking at it, I was at the centre point of it, in some way I was it. I could look around, as if turning my head in a new world of energetic plasma, smiling in amazement that I was surrounded by a flowing sea of spiral arms each cutting and impossibly splitting that space, and into each slice I could peer and see waves of crisp bright sparkling iridescent energy.

There is a brief moment, a pause, where nothing moves, then suddenly i get the feeling of being smiled at by some unseen face, something mischievous and jester-like. It had me. Suddenly everything violently splits, tearing aggressively and peeling away. Each of the thousands of shapes rotating and spinning in its own impossible way and the fabric of all that was before me exploding with purpose. I feel as though I'm falling, but certainly not downwards. In the darkness I feel pressure forces of incredible acceleration... blast off. I hear an audible digital stretching echo as my mind turned inside out.

I feel in some kind of tunnel. All I can see are spiralling and unfolding darkened gothic limbs, within which I see events, images or some concepts of some external perception of myself. Different versions of this 'me' manifest in different universes which seemed somehow separate from my current observation. They kept consistently emerging from a central point, spinning and flowing out and around my periphery. I became aware of seeing different time streams of the life of this Richard, each tinged with an unknown sadness.

Wordless questions emerge. How? Why? As the viewer I'm desperately scrubbing events forwards and backwards simultaneously in this manic split timestream between similar but separate lives. Each variation leading to some point of tragedy. The tragedy is my death. No matter which version of Richard I try to pursue and change, no matter how much I try to change events in each timeframe, I cannot avoid the inevitable. I must die.

Once i realise this, I accept it fully and wholly with relative ease, knowing full well that there will be another chance in another form. I relinquish my tethers to Richard, and with that many versions of his life flash at lightspeed. The information streaming from the tunnel begins to form into a concept, that life is much like an arrow moving through a swampy cloud of information, where that information is a set of inputs defined by probability. This cloud exists in some "other", an absolute state of all that is and ever will be. When the arrow or vector ploughs through the information it calculates from the data, and in turn creates time and space itself to manifest objects, and consequently a subjective view of those objects.

When a life is lived, it both creates and simultaneously perceives based on this input and its own feedback, operating within a fuzzy framework or ruleset. There is no one single arrow to make up a 'self', with several equally valid arrows of calculation constantly breaking away from it, experiencing variation that may manifest in some small different way in a new branch of similar time and space. Each probably has weight, each diverging, then attracting the other toward itself, criss-crossing and intersecting, to create a common inertial blunt wave of experience that is a story of a life. Where does this arrow originate? Of what energy propels it? I seek more answers.

There is a stillness in a new darkness. A void of seemingly perpetual nothingness. I am eternity. I burst into a new place, an explosion of colour and form. A spark at the beginning of all things. I find myself under a vaulted dome of brilliant light. It is all around, under and above me, yet i can see it all at once. There is no direction here, yet before me, self illuminated with a perfect light, I see a textured wall of such exquisite pattern and shape, undulating and evolving, changing and forming. Sporadically points will flare up and bloom towards me. Each surface filled with an infinite level of detail, each geometric subsurface blooming further still. It was a gestalt of pure creation.

As I calmly viewed this most beautiful transcendent cathedral form that flowed and undulated, I realised that I had influence in this place. Through thought, and by changing my inner frequency or vibration, it would have a direct result on this infinitely faceted architecture before me. I was painting with an impossible space and light by changing how i felt, and in doing so was a form of communication beyond words, beyond sound, of pure understanding. I can only liken it to a telepathy, communing with creation itself. Incredible. I felt a serene happiness, a bliss. The more I would think and allow the happiness to flow through me the more the dome of light would evolve and grow, turning into some kind of mountainous land and cities of indescribable colour.

Then i feel it start to fade, the broad spectrum of unworldly colours dimming. The shapes begin to flatten out, become less dimensional, more spatial. I feel a faint recognition of again of being someone, of knowing that I must return somewhere. It's time to go back. I feel like I am being cradled, and lowered peacefully back into my body. I feel gravity. I breathe again.

Contentment.

I continued to sit there in my room, everything slowly swirling back to normal. My thoughts returning to a regular flow, my breath calm and steady. Smiling, I pondered what an incredible, scary, beautiful, and enjoyable experience. I sat in somewhat of a meditative state for some time. Peace. Euphoria.

I opened my eyes, looked at my clock, only 15 minutes had passed.

DMT is truly incredible, words are an injustice and wholly ill equipped to describe the experience. It is beyond imagination. I hope it piques your curiosity, as the only way you can understand the profound, ineffable Spirit Molecule, is to try it for yourself.