by thedoctor, GoozX and Tobias Christopher
A few minutes ago:
Dirk Bell had just walked downstairs, yawning. He was still in his boxers and wearing a T-shirt that said No Fat Chicks. It was an unusual sight for anyone these days to see his auburn hair at all, much less in the disarray that it was after a night's sleep. What was most unusual was the fact that he wasn't armed. Having little work in the past few weeks, Dirk saw little need in spending the hour or so gearing up when the likelihood of needing it was nil.
The smell of crispy bacon wafted from the kitchen. As he approached the door, a crashing sound came from the other side. Then, the door flew open as a horde of little black monsters poured out and knocked Dirk back. "Well, isn't this a hell of a note!" he said as he ran toward the closet in the lobby.
Dirk opened the door and searched for anything that he could use as a weapon. He pulled out a towel, looked it over, shook his head, and tossed it. As he rummaged some more, he found a rubber band and a paper clip. "Might as well."
One of the black goblins grabbed its eye and dropped to the ground with a paper clip stuck in it. Another felt the force of the rubber band as it, too, shrieked in pain.
"Out of ammo," Dirk said as he returned to the closet.
As his hands moved about, he thought he felt something cold and metal. Dirk pulled out a golf club from the back of the closet. This'll do, he thought to himself as he turned back toward the little invaders.
As the battle raged on, Dirk found himself close to Grimm, who seemed to be blocking the creatures from getting to Sam Dawson and Shirley Francis. "So," Dirk said to Grimm, "read any good books lately?" A goblin received a shot from the nine-iron right in the head. "FORE!" The critter crashed through the front window.
"Looks like a hole in one," Grimm said, trying to keep up with the banter that Dirk had quickly received a reputation for.
"Gotta go for those," Dirk said as both men steadily struck oncoming goblins. "I'm not much of a putter." He quickly turned his attention to Shirley and Sam. "Are you two okay?"
Shirley began to reply, "Ye--" until she got a look at Dirk's T-shirt.
"It was a gift! Cut me some slack!" Dirk responded as he returned to his business at hand.
"Just keep me covered for one more minute, buddy," Sam quickly said toward Grimm. "The eggs and bacon are almost finished!"
A little critter got past Grimm and Dirk, and quickly Sam jumped in front of Shirley, both of his hands occupied with pots. Quickly he lifted his foot, which morphed into a long knife, ripping apart his sandal and slicing the little creature in two. His foot shifted back to normal, and he flipped the eggs and bacon into a bowl.
"All ready!" Sam yelled as Grimm took apart a creature with his bare hands.
"Okay, just keep the breakfast safe. We'll take care of these things in no time!"
"Fore!" Dirk yelled again as he knocked a creature clear across the room. It splattered on the wall, leaving a goopy, green, goo, ooze-like substance.
"Hold this for a moment." Sam handed Shirley the bowl with the breakfast and shifted both of his hands into knives, and little spikes appeared all over his body. Jumping on the counter, he did a swan dive into a pile of creatures, slicing and dicing before ever hitting the ground.
"By the way, anyone know what the hell is going on?" Sam asked as he sliced through the creatures.
"These things just showed up!" Tobias Christopher said as he slammed the creatures into each other. "Do I smell bacon?"
"I don't care what these things are, but we're taking them down!" Sam said as he saw Tobias scarfing down the breakfast. "Hey, save some for the rest of us!"
"Sorry," Tobias said. "Supermetabolism."
They continued to fight their way toward the door, listening to the sounds of more creatures coming in.