by I'm Not Mister Mxypltk
An alley somewhere in Chicago:
The figure of a man stumbling around and wearing a large coat and a big top hat surprised a homeless man lying on the ground. The man with the coat and the top hat collided with a wall and remained still for awhile.
"So... tired," he thought, and he was right. He just spent an awful lot of energy in cancelling his other half, K'tl. "Must... rest," he said, as he slowly sat on the ground and closed his glowing eyes.
One second later, he opened his eyes again, but the light coming from them was gone. He looked around and started screaming.
"Hey, what's the freakin' deal? Can't you see I'm trying to get some sleep here?" the homeless man said. "I mean, one minute you say yer gonna rest, and the next you are screamin' like a woman! You don't make no sense!"
"I-I'm sorry," the man with the coat and the hat said, "but I could swear I was in my apartment two seconds ago... and now I'm in some dirty alley... What the hell happened?"
"Wanna know what happened? I'll tell ya what happened! Yer nuts, that's what happened! Now shut it, and lemme get some sleep. Tomorrow is gonna be a very important day!"
"Uh... okay," the man with the coat and the hat said. "I-I'm gonna be leaving now, so..."
"Yeah, get out!"
"Yeah... bye," the man with the coat and the hat said as he walked into the street. He looked around, confused, noticing that he was wearing a hospital robe under the coat... and then noticing he had a coat.
He looked at the names of the streets, and he was glad to see he was still in Chicago. As he walked, still confused, a woman looked at him, took a deep breath, and said, "YOU!"
"Wha...? Me...?"
"Yes, you! I just got fired because of you!"
"Huh...?"
"You think you can just... walk into a store with your... big smile and shiny eyes... take whatever you want, and leave without paying?"
"Take...? Big smi...? Shiny eyes?"
"Oh, don't look at me like you don't know what I'm talking about! You are not fooling me again, Mister! If that's your real name!"
"I-I'm sorry, ma'am, but I must say that I honestly don't know what you're talking about. You must be confusing me with someone else."
"Confusing you? Confusing you?! Do you see someone else wearing a giant top hat?"
"I have a hat...?" he reached up and felt it. "Whoa, I have a hat..."
"Yes, you have a hat, one you stole from a department store, one I let you steal! They fired me because of you two minutes ago!"
"I can't remember any of what you have just said, ma'am... b-but if what you say is true, I must say that I'm really sorry for any inconveniences I may have caused."
She looked at him for a second, and as soon as she realized she was feeling sympathy for him again, she screamed, "I TOLD YOU, YOU WON'T FOOL ME AGAIN, YOU... PRICK! Now GET LOST! If I ever see you again, I swear I'll call the cops!"
She walked away, leaving him wondering if what she said was true.
"Maybe she's right. Maybe hours... days passed between my living room and the alley. Maybe I did all those things, and now I can't..."
She's really something, isn't she?...
"...can't..."
But I'm glad I wasn't using your body back there!...
"Who are you?"
I'm sorry, how rude of me -- my name is M'xy...
"I'm Mick Harrison... wait, what the fuck are you doing in my mind?!"
Well, I'm... afraid I can't reveal the reason of my trip to this dimension...
"You did all those things? GET OUT OF MY BODY!"
Now that is just rude...
"GET OUT OF MY BODY! NOW!"
Look, pal, I would love it if we could co-exist, I really would, but I'm afraid that ain't possible...
"What the FUCK are you talking about? GET OUT!"
Look, lets act like civili--
"OUT!"
Oh, you asked for it...
The eyes of the man with the coat and the hat started shining again, as M'xy repossessed the body. He started walking, ignoring all the people who had been watching him argue with himself, and said, "Now... where were we?"