by The Eurostar and Chewy Walrus
Edulcore Cicciotto:
And the day has finally arrived. Mr. Wong has provided each of us with a passport. I wonder where he has found them. I guess money can open every door.
Before leaving for the airport, I have made a last trip to the book store to buy a tourist guide to Europe, and now, while we are on the bus that will bring us to the Robert Kamphausen International Airport of Thunder City, I have opened it to the section on Mandelovia.
MANDELOVIA
Mandelovia sits on the European stage almost as an enigma. Many people outside of Europe have never heard of the nation, and even European school children have difficulty locating it on a map of the continent. Nevertheless, Mandelovia stands as a beacon among the nations and cities of Europe.
HISTORY
Sometime in the late thirteenth century, Boris Mandelov -- a prolific inventor and prominent member of the magistrate council of Ivan the Great, grand duke of Moscow -- being one of Ivan's most trusted friends and advisers, was sent to expand Russian territory to the waterfront. The exact date was included in The Foundation of Mandelovia by Boris Mandelov; unfortunately, all copies of this book were burned by the Nazis during World War II. Mandelov left and founded the small port city of Mandelovia, which he named for himself, as Ivan's insistence.
Shortly before his death in 1505, Ivan signed a document that cemented the small city as a sovereign nation, capable of maintaining itself on a global scale. Immediately after, Mandelov and a few close advisers and friends drafted the Mandelovian Charter, which served to lay out the system of governance. In the first (and only) unanimous vote in Mandelovian history, Boris Mandelov was named the nation's first President-Prime Minister in 1515.
Mandelov then appointed his Congressional Parliament, which would govern the nation in his absence or incapacitation. They included Italian fisherman Zacaria Sardella, Bavarian soldier Hollis D'goon, German philosopher Ludwig Strauss, and British sailor Sir Gregory Mark. These four men assessed different areas of the Mandelovian government and offered aid and advice to President-Prime Minister Mandelov. Sardella was named Head of Internal Affairs, D'goon, Head of the Mandelovian Armed Forces, Strauss, Head Justice, and Mark, Head of the Treasury.
Mandelovia still holds these traditions today, looking back to its great hero and founder Boris Mandelov. Since its inception, Mandelovia has not grown much and is classified by some not as a nation, but instead as a city-state.
GOVERNMENT
The Mandelovian system of government, as it stands in the Mandelovian Charter, is run by two branches -- the administrative branch and the governmental-legal branch. The administrative branch is the alternate name for the position of President-Prime Minister. The PPM, as it is known, is the monarchal-republican ruler of Mandelovia.
Every six years, the Presidential-Prime Ministerial elections are held in Mandelovia. During this occasion, the winner of the majority vote wins the seat of Mandelovia's chief administrative officer. However, according to Article 9, Section 27-B of the Mandelovian Charter, "If a President-Prime Minister is not selected, then all the powers granted unto him and his position are to be given in full to the Congressional Parliament's Security Council."
The Congress-Parliament is the governmental-legal branch of Mandelovian government. It consists of four equally powered Heads and one hundred citizen members. The Heads are the Head of Internal Affairs, the Head of the Armed Forces, the Head of the Treasury, and the Head Justice. These men are appointed by each President-Prime Minister and serve for as long as he does. The one hundred citizen members, however, are elected annually from among the populace.
The Head of Internal Affairs oversees everything about the city of Mandelovia herself. He supervises the construction of roads, buildings, highways, and railroads. He watches over the agriculture and farming areas of Mandelovia, making sure that the general populace is cared for. He also makes sure that Mandelovia's second largest industry, tourism, is maintained in all efficiency. Most importantly, however, the Head of Internal Affairs looks out for the personal well-being of every Mandelovian.
The Head of the Armed Forces has obviously been placed in charge of all forms of Mandelovian military. Mandelovia has a gifted army and navy, which consists of every able-bodied male member of the country. (For this reason, some critics claim that Mandelovia's military is nothing more than a militia.) However, there are full-time officers who keep the peace among the population. The other members are considered "off-draft" until a time of war, something that Mandelovia has very nearly never experienced. The Head of the Armed Forces is in charge of enforcement of the laws set in action by the rest of the CP.
The Head of the Treasury assumes command of Mandelovian commerce and economy. This man monitors every aspect of Mandelovian commerce, mainly interstate trade, as Mandelovia's isolationist tendencies are concerned (see the section entitled Foreign Relations for more information). He also monitors businesses and makes decisions regarding the national economy of Mandelovia as a whole. The Head of the Treasury is also in charge of maintaining Mandelovia's budget, making sure goals are met and spending is not superseded.
The Head Justice heads up the legal half of the governmental-legal branch. He sits at the head of all courts in Mandelovia, while an appointed twenty-five of the one-hundred elected citizen members of the CP (Congressional Parliament) sit as the jury. All criminals, enemies of state, and other law-breakers come before the Head Justice.
The one hundred citizen members of the CP are elected annually from among the populace to make laws and decisions regarding the governing and running of Mandelovia. All laws must be passed by a three-fourths majority vote, then approved by both three-fourths of the CP Heads and then by the PPM. Any laws that are not twice approved are sent back to the citizen members for review and revision, or for complete omission.
The President-Prime Minister is above the CP Heads, as he is the one who appoints them, but, in order to maintain a favorable balance of powers, the Heads and the PPM must each stand trial annually in what is called the Mandelovian Council and listen to the grievances of the population. As they are looking out for the good of the populace, any decisions made at the Council are to be set in action by the Heads and PPM immediately, no questions asked.
In retrospect, Mandelovia is a democracy, a monarchy, a republic, and an oligarchy, yet it is also none of these things. Mandelovia was set up as having a unique system of government since its inception, and that uniqueness has lasted even to this day.
FOREIGN RELATIONS
Aside from a near entry into World War II, Mandelovia has remained the most neutral country in all the world. Mandelov Palace has been the location of a number of peace talks for warring European nations. Mandelovia's neutrality has been said to even rival that of Sweden and Switzerland.
The main reason for Mandelovia's neutrality is her isolationist tendencies, much like those practised by the early Americans. Mandelovia's first PPM, Boris Mandelov, knowing that a small nation like Mandelovia was likely to be pressured by larger nations, set up what was known as the Mandelov Isolation Act of 1519. This act said that Mandelovia, as a nation, was to remain a separate, sovereign entity from other nations. The act prohibited the country from forming military alliances and set the Armed Forces up as a defensive measure only.
Since Mandelov helped put the law into action, other measures have been made to isolate Mandelovia from the rest of the world. The Sardella-Mark Act of 1522 prohibited Mandelovia from participating in any foreign trade, forcing them to build their own economy to suit all their needs, and thus promoting self-sufficiency. In an address made after the Second World War, President-Prime Minister Mortimeri Stanton said that "Mandelovia shall, under no circumstances, participate in this global 'team-up' known as the United Nations! Our forefather, Boris Mandelov, meant for Mandelovia to be her own nation, and, as I stand here before you today, I declare that that shall be!" This speech prompted the passing of the Stanton-Passor Act, which forbade Mandelovia from joining any sort of league of nations or sending ambassadors to other nations.
Mandelovia's isolationist tendencies have not dissuaded tourists from entering her borders. Mandelovia's tourism, actually, is at an all-time high. While Mandelovia is, by its nature, a melting pot of different cultures, those various cultures have made Mandelovia the stunningly beautiful land of heritage that it is today.
ECONOMY AND COMMERCE
Due to the Sardella-Mark Act of 1522, trade and sales among various nations is forbidden in Mandelovia. Because of this, Mandelovia is incredibly self-sufficient. However, despite the tabs kept on trade, foreign merchants representing large corporations have managed to move to Mandelovia and set up their own places of business. Examples include McDonald's, the Gap, and Nike.
However, Mandelovia does most of its food growth right in the city. Hydroponics laboratories placed at various temperatures allow for almost any type of food to be grown for Mandelovian sale and consumption. Genetically engineered beef, poultry, fish, and other meats largely have replaced farming in Mandelovia, although some farms do exist on the outskirts of the country, just beyond the city limits. Clothing production is also solely Mandelovian (with the exception of the "foreign merchant" stores).
The Mandelovian unit of currency is the Sed, which has been in circulation since 1947, when the Congressional Parliament decided to change the unit from the florin it had used during World War Two. The Sed bears the image of Boris Mandelov on one side and a picture of Mandelov Palace on the other.
The Mandelovians are largely capitalists, though there seem to be very few that fit into the lower-class lifestyle. Most are fairly well off with fairly well-paying jobs. Most are involved with Mandelovia's chief product, technology, such as computers, software, and items that seem very futuristic compared with the tech used by the rest of the world. (It is said that Mandelov, the gifted inventor, had prophetic visions of future equipment and used that foreknowledge to build Mandelovia into the technological marvel that it is today. This is also said to be the initial reason behind the often disputed Sardella-Mark Act. However, this is merely speculation.)
THE CITY
The city of Mandelovia basically consists of two main parts -- New Mandelovia and Old Mandelovia. Old Mandelovia is the part of the city that has been standing since its inception more than five hundred years ago. The buildings there are very old, yet some (for example, Mandelov Palace) have been upgraded to include the latest in Mandelovian technology.
Among the buildings and attractions that exist in Old Mandelovia are the Mandelovian National Museum of Art, the Boris Mandelov memorial, and, in the heart of the city, Mandelov Palace.
New Mandelovia is the more modern area of Mandelovia. It includes many software companies and other businesses, as well as the offices of the Congressional Parliament Heads. What Old Mandelovia lacks in 21st Century magic, New Mandelovia more than makes up for with its advanced technology used in everything from street lights to ways of beating pollution.
Outside New Mandelovia are the centers of normal life in Mandelovia. Toward the land-locked side of the country, farmers and shepherds care for their flocks, animals, and vegetables in order to provide just some of the food supply for all of Mandelovia. On the seaboard side, Mandelovia Harbor houses a great number of ships, which are used for fishing, sailing, water skiing, and other aquatic activities. In a secluded area of the harbor is the vessel of Zacaria Sardella, which has been docked in the Harbor since 1580. Out from the Harbor sits the D'goon Lighthouse, named for Hollis D'goon, the first Mandelovian Head of the Armed Forces. Some argue that it is named for WWII General Mortirmeri D'goon, but since the lighthouse was built and named in 1953, it is almost impossible to know which.
THE COUNTRY
Although very small, Mandelovia shows a very environmentally different territory, stretching from the subtropical seaside to some of the highest peaks in Europe, with nearly arctic conditions. It also sports the only European desert, well known among geographers for its peculiar shape: it is perfectly circular, an event so rare, even impossible in nature, that some conspiracy theorists have speculated it could have resulted from an unspecified extraterrestrial war fought in an ancient past on our planet, using nuclear devices. Apart from this silliness, researchers are divided on the desert's origins.
The country of Mandelovia mirrors the variety of its cultures, presenting a vast array of flora and fauna, typical of very different places. Thus, not far from the Mediterranean, where monk seals sunbathe on the beach, there is ptarmigan of the boreal tundra, and while on the mountaintops exist birch and Scottish pines, on the coast we can find palm and olive trees.
The memories of the desert come to me. The manifestation of my powers, the death of Lorena, the meeting with Danny. It was mere months ago, but it seems like years have passed.