by the Message Board League of writers
[NOTE: The first page of "A New Beginning for the MBL" is lost.]
Doff: "Okay, I'm going to make one more stab at joining, and if it doesn't work this time, I'm going to change my name to Team-Destroying Boy. I try to join the MBL, they split. I think of joining the MBL, they decided not to reform. A guy could get a real paranoia problem with these things happening.
HourGirl: "Okay, boys... in DIRE need of further explanations here. Thanks, Nowhereman, you are my HERO! LLB/HNB/MLE...? Now, I wanna join! ... I think. Fun is my middle name, ask the Hourman boys! Do I get to still be HourGirl? I can tell you about all my superpowers... OR... I could just SHOW you!" She grinned a wicked grin.
Disco Stave: "So I've seen, HourGirl."
The Jokey One: "Can I sign up? What do I have to do?"
Nowhereman: "Hourgirl... the LLB is the Living Legends Brigade, I think. MLE is Meta League of Europe. HNB is Hardy New-Born, our beloved leader. Jokey One... just invite yourself into the adventure when it starts!"
Thread Killer: "Greetings, MBL. I am your new enemy. DIE!"
Disco Stave: "Ooh! New enemy!"
Cliff Richard: "Thread Killer, please join my MBSOSV, and we shall destroy the MBL! Disco Stave, that fucker, shall be the first to fall!"
Marv Velo: "'First to fall'? Whew. I don't like the sound of that. I'm glad I got out while I could..."
Cliff Richard: "You'll get yours as well, Velo! I'm gonna hunt down all ex-members as well, and smash them like the cowardly dogs they are! You bunch of fuckers are gonna get it! I am not a nice man!"
HourGirl batted her bedroom eyes at Cliff and fiddled with her hourglass while he was mesmerized by her beauty.
Happy Noodle Boy: "I know you've been waiting for it... you're holding your breath in anticipation... The new, improved MBL roster! Happy Noodle Boy (leader), Agent F7 (second-in-command), Starwynd, Money-Grubber, Dragnet Zero, Sir Justin of Camelot, Zed, Espen Saltfjord, Disco Stave, Nowhereman, M'xy, Time Trustee Tempus, Electric Power Torque, Natsuko, HourGirl, Doff, Jokey One, and Marv Velo, whether he likes it or not!
"Phew! If you want to join the list, even if you're an old member, come to the MBL Headquarters. Back and better than ever!
"We are back to kick some tail,
The MBL will never fail!"
Agent F7: "I hope Marv Velo rejoins the MBL. And what about Zed?"
Zed: "Don't worry about me. I'm still in."
Arch-Moderator: "First off... Rob Kaufampshen? Kaufampshen?! C'mon, man! Please, guys, in all seriousness, enough with the metahero team. I know you love it, but you're going to have to find another place for it. Thanks! ... Rob Kaufampshen... geesh..."
[First page of "Club MBL" is lost.]
As the Indestructible Man heard the beeping from the homing device he sent into the wormhole with Zed, he pulled out his tracker from the glove compartment and calibrated the signal. The MBL members collectively shrugged and went back to their business.
I-Man: "All right, then, I'll go find some other help, or do this alone..."
He climbed into the Pre-Crisis Super-Dodge and started it up, switching quickly to neutral, while the MBLers present saw the silver car begin to shimmer and fade away as it quivered.
Hardy New-Born: "Well, that was odd."
Eurostar: "Yeah..."
Doff: "Drink, anyone?"
A smattering of hands raised as Doff moved behind the bar.
Suddenly, heard over the communication badges was a faint sound. "Help. Can anybody hear me? I seem to be stranded. I believe these are my co-ordinates: 84/000020. Please help if you can. Oh, and its one of your MLBers: Flintlock."
Disco Stave: "Heh.
Eurostar: "Okay, you are hired. We need a gardener, too. Anybody is interested?"
[First page of "Arch-Moderator attack" is lost.]
New Troy City was gone, destroyed by a new villain and his league of villains. The small, five-member team of the MBL was not powerful enough to defeat the villains and stop the mass murder.
It was during this time of defeat and death that the MBL regrouped to forge a new start. Members past and present returned in memory of the lives taken away during the battle. The five members of the MBL, including Smasher, Jokey One, Dragnet Zero, HourGirl, were left for dead, and would have been had it not been for the healing powers of Hardy New-Born and Major Man using New-Born's powers together.
It was during this time of rebuilding that the real battle started. The Arch-Moderator attacked. He left the MBL without a home or a universe in which to live. In a draw of luck, Prometheus X used all of his power to contain the Arch-Moderator and let the MBL escape into another universe by using a small sliding device. Now, they were heroes on the run, from world to world, universe to universe. They would fight the never-ending battle of justice until they one day found their true home again.
King Psionic: "Even though I'm not a member or anything, I'll try to help out.
Hardy New-Born: "You're a member now. I just inducted you."
Disco Stave: "Great!"
Doff: "Damn, man three times I've joined the MBL, three times it's crashed. I think someone's out to get us. Oh, no! I can see them! AIIIEEEEEEEE!"
Crunch.
Marv Velo: "Did I just hear the sound of somebody dying?"
Nowhereman: "Nah, it's probably just you."
Meta 7: "Good Lord, an Arch-Moderator resistance group featuring Jonah's Whale, Nobody, the Rhymer, Electric Power Torque, and myself. Maybe I'll just close up shop at Promethean City and hunker down here for awhile."
Jonah's Whale: "Hunker, Kahoetek, Hunker. Katchoo's around here somewhere, too."
Nowhereman: "Red hot monkeys on a bed of steaming tabasco sauce covered in creamy elephant trunk! Hmmm, lovely!
Disco Stave: "Heh."
Marv Velo: "I don't wanna know where that thought came from..."
Time Trustee Tempus: "So, did the Arch-Mod delete Club MBL, or am I just blind?"
Disco Stave: "Yup."
Marv Velo: "He did delete Club MBL."
Jonah's Whale: "Big Brother is watching..."
King Psionic, speaking with his eyes glazed over, said, "I think we should give the Arch-Moderator a break! He is doing a great job!"
Eurostar: "The Arch-Mod is doing a very good job. The MBL has reached a so-great legendary status only facing great foes like him."
Jonah's Whale: "I say we get him before he gets us again... What say you? MBL! We must reunite to battle this threat. A hero never stays down. Are you with me? That's my attempt at a rallying cry!"
Nowhereman: "I dont think the Arch-Mod likes me! He gave me a warning for my anarchistic ways! I better change my ways... Ch'yeah, right!"
Chris Oakley: "Get out the nukes!"
Disco Stave: "Heh."
M'xy: "Who moderates the moderators?"
M'xy, speaking with his eyes glazed over, said in a monotone voice, "I am very sorry for what I said earlier. I mean it. I'm not being moderated in any way. This is my real opinion."
Archie Moderow: "Hi, friends! I'm just another metahero fan who wants to join a metahero team. I also would like to know about your MBL plans. Come on, I won't tell them to anybody! And most important of all, I'M NOT THE ARCH-MODERATOR. Repeat, I'M NOT THE ARCH-MODERATOR!" He turned aside and laughed, thinking, They'll never know that I'm the Arch-Moderator!
Karl Kirby: "Hey, if he is the Arch-Moderator, then who is the Moderator?"
Arch-Moderator: "I am not Rob. Or am I?"
Smasher: "Guys? ... Hello! When the hell are you going to save me from being stuck across hypertime? Huh... And I thought you were my friends!"
[The first page of "MBL" is lost.]
Eurostar said, in his strong Italian accent, "Timothy, I am very sad to hear this, because if you are slave of Medusa Lass, it's my duty to bring you to justice. No memory of the past could stop me! I'll do that with the death in my heart, as we say in my little country, but this the difficult task of being a hero. Beware, TTT, because your nemesis is born! And, by the way, day four and counting..."
IOIOIOIIOICRASHHZZZZHZHZZZIOIOIOI
Begin transmission.
"Guys, it's me... SMASHER!! IOIOZZZZzIOIOI... I'm not sure if you're getting this message, because I have been BANNED... I'm with a friend, but this might not be enough... Group together... reform, I need your hel--"
IOIOIOIOOOIZIPPPZPZZZZIOIOIOIOOIOI
End of transmission.
A dark street in Promethean City:
A lone figure hurried through the brisk night air. He stumbled. Looking down, he noticed his right shoe was untied. Swearing softly, he knelt down to tie it. That was when he noticed the paper. Crumpled and stepped on, it still drew his attention. He recognized the header: MBL. He was mesmerized. A fever gripped his body. He knew he must join.
He was running now, faster, faster. His legs would only go so fast down the stairs into the subway. He hurdled the turnstile and kept going. Panting, he paused for breath and looked around. There were MBL signs everywhere. They must be desperate for members, he thought. He knew he must get there to join.
Sixteen minutes later, the subway car barely stopped when he sprinted out, up the stairs, down the street. The door slammed open as he burst into the room. Gasping for breath, Gothic Resident croaked out, "Is this the cooking club? I must know how to make better lasagna!"
"I wonder if this will work..." said Gooz. Smiling, he said, "I beat the system!"
Nowhereman: "ARCH-MOD! LEAVE SMASHER ALONE, YA BIG BULLY!"
M'xy: "I have the feeling that the Arch-Mod is observing us, so... HEY, PA, MEETING AT FIVE, AND COME ON, KARL, TALK TO ME! I'M REALLY SORRY ABOUT THAT KILLING YOU THING."
Hardy New-Born: "I have no time for your mind games!"
Eurostar: "Gulp! Day five and counting..."
Lance: "Hmmm... Should I interject myself into the altercation between Time Trustee Tempus and Eurostar or become embroiled with Gothic Resident's scenario where everyone is an MBL sign? Altercations between superbeings has been done to death, but how often does one get to become an MBL sign? Sign me up, Gothic Resident! I'm intrigued!"
Batting her eyes, HourGirl looked at the assembled MBL members and uttered, "Friends, my arse! It's Thursday! Let's party!"
Having been rejected from the cooking club, a dejected Gothic Resident looked around. Not knowing where he was, he tried to become oriented. The city was bright and shiny and didn't seem right. Promethean City used to be dank and dark. Dazed and confused, he went to ask the nearest person for help. "Sir, can you... Ack! Your head... it's... it's... a sign!"
MBL.
He turned to a nearby passerby, but slammed into a sandwich board MBL. "What happened? That was just a person!"
Bewildered, he spun around. Everyone was MBL. What is this? He closed his eyes. Please make it stop, he thought.
He opened them. The city was gone. There was no indication that it ever existed. But in his heart he could still the message: MBL... MBL...
A hand touched his shoulder, and he turned toward it.
"I've banished it," said a familiar face. Gothic Resident thought it was the Arch-Moderator, but couldn't be sure.
"All of them?"
"They are scattered. Crushed and beaten. I have won."
Moderator Buries League.
Lance: "It's so much more fun being an MBL sign! I had no idea MBL could stand for anything other than Meta Board League! Let's see... Moronic Bums Liason, Much Better Lucy, Milton Bradley League, Millionaires Billionnaires Luncheon..."
Time Trustee Tempus: "Miniscule Bone Lickers (ugh!), Massive Butt Lovers (eck!), Mission By Littlebear, Mondo Bean Lint, Maybe Boring Lush, Muck Ball League..."
Eurostar: "Mucus Bleeding Leeches... day six and counting..."
Hardy New-Born: "I see."
Lance: "I saw."
The Indestructible Man: "Hmmm... Think that the Arch-Mod's just keeping from deleting this meeting to watch us sweat, wondering when it'll go the way of the dodo? Micro-Bacterial Lizards!"
Gothic Resident: "My Bottle Leaks, Many Broken Laws, Militant Band Leader..."
Disco Stave: "Major Baseball League..."
Eurostar: "Day seven and counting..."
M'xy: "We need to be more explicit if we want the Arch-Mod to look at us..."
Nowhereman: "Monkey Bollock Lover, Men's Buttock Lubricant, Moderator Bastard Lives, Martin Balsam Laughs..."
Hardy New-Born: "Meta Board League! ... I'm no good at this..."
Lance: "Hmm... I really don't have a darn thing to say!"
HourGirl: "Well, bless my bloody arse!"
M'xy: "Okay, there's a new mission for you guys... Someone must post ten billboards saying 'The Arch-Moderator is a son of a bitch' to see and evualate the results. Any volunteers?"
Time Trustee Tempus: "The Arch-Mod is a cross between a Bulldog and a Shih-tzu... Actually, sorry, that was uncharacteristic of me. I'm a gentle, peace-loving sort of guy. Arch-Mod, can't we all just get along?"
Theory9: "The way I see it, the Arch-Mod's a playa, and y'all just a bunch of playahatas. Either that, or the Arch-Mod is this incredibly mean guy who closes groups for no reason... either way, FUCK IT!"
Lance: "This meeting will live forever! Just GO ASK BEPPO! He'll tell you!"
HourGirl: "If I am going to post ten things about the Arch-Mod... they are gonna be FAR more interesting than THAT! And THAT would be SURE to get us deleted!" She fanned herself.
Eurostar: "Day nine and counting..."
Lance: "It's been nine days, already! What fun! What mischief! What derring-do! We're going to live forever! ... Wait! What if the Arch-Mod was on vacation this past week? We could be a distant and lonely memory come nine a.m. Monday morning! ... Well, it was a great run! Let's live every second like it is our last!"
Eurostar: "Day ten and counting..."
In the Nowherecave located under the Colosseum in Rome, Italy, Eurostar was on monitor duty, trying to locate any signs of the presence of the Arch-Moderator. It was on day ten that he began watching.
Looking at a statue of Trivia Lad, the sidekick of the Golden Ager Mr. Nowhereman, he was thinking of the All-Adventurers Squadron, the Dynamiteens, Time Trustee Tempus, and the MBL, wondering if all that was ended forever.
But in that moment, Timothy Trystan, the Time-Boy, returned from his exile in hypertime, now having aged ten years and all grown up, and kicked the crap out of Time Trustee Tempus, who had gone bad, deactivating him and arresting Medusa Lass. He then transported TTT back to the time stream for permanent deactivation and study to figure out what went wrong, and dropped the name of Timothy Trystan, the Time-Boy, becoming Time Trustee Tryst. Medusa Lass was locked up on the Prison Planet, and the MBL was safe from a possible threat.
Now Time Trustee Tryst, he went to the Nowherecave in Italy to look up an old friend.
Eurostar: "Ah, you now are the big thing, Timothy. Or TTT, I should say... I'm here to monitor the Arch-Moderator's activities, but it's eleven days, and nothing has happened... And I have found this new lady, MeDuSa, but after I meet her, she has disappeared! Have you seen her, TTT, in your time travels?"
Gothic Resident, on a whirlwind tour of Europe, wandered into the cave. "Excuse me, but I'm looking for the tour. Whoa! This place isn't in the guide book. Is that what I think it is? Is this really... one of the Nowherecaves of the great Nowhereman?"
"Yes, but me and my friend TTT were speaking, and is not very polite for you to interrupt us," replied Eurostar.
"Excuse me, buddy, but I popped here from nowhere, and I was amazed at the beautiful architecture of this little grotto!" gasped Gothic Resident.
"Yes, it's a little marvel, and it's only three thousand years old. Nowhereman himself never completed the exploration of the hidden recesses of this cave..."
Time Trustee Tryst: "MeDuSa, hmm? I would watch out for anyone calling themselves Medusa anything. Or have you forgotten my ex-wife, Medusa Lass?"
M'xy: NEXT MISSION (why am I giving orders?): POST TEN MESSAGES SAYING THE ARCH-MODERATOR IS A SON OF A BITCH. The winner gets... A BANNING!"
Eurostar: "TTT, MeDuSa appeared only one time. She seduced me, but she has disappeared since, so I think I'm safe."
MeDuSa showed up, holding a newborn baby. "Hi, Eurostar, this is your son..."
Eurostar: "I'm a dad! How I'm happy! Wait... there are snakes coming out of my son's head... No fear...in twenty years, they'll fall off like daddy's hair!"
Snake-Headed Son: "Gahhh. Dadda, momma, ehhhh. Glub glub glub. Leh ehh ihh. Ghahhhh."
##############################
Shock-Headed Peter: "And that's about twenty-one days and counting. Anyone want to strike up a full blown story?
Smasher:
**** Rob, let's just start a new and improved MBL thread!
Anyone with me.........?
***
The Time Trust:
Hell, yeah!
***
Joker1:
I'm in, if I can join.
***
The Indestructible Man:
three weeks? time indeed for a new story!
what's the current roster then? and who's gonna start the story?
which DC crossover parody is the MBL up to now with the Arch-Moderator-induced "MBL Lost" era apparently over?
***
LLANCE:
Change for the sake of change? I don't know. I am getting tired of waiting for this thread to be deleted.
Okay! I'm in!
***
Gotham Resident:
Oh goody a story!
***
The Indestructible Man:
Yeah! Story time!
(ha...I just realized that Eurostar started this thread -- and he's he character affected most by its existance...)
***
Smasher:
Before we start the new story, everyone has to sign in the Official Meeting area of the HQ . Click on the link below...
www.netcolony.com/entertainment/mbl2000/guestbook.html
***
The Indestructible Man:
yeah, everyone sign in, and see my (apparently stretched out there)MBL logo!
So, where precisely will the new MBL HQ (the Posttower?)be situated in the message board universe?
***
Eurostar, holding his son in his arms, watch silentfully the gathering of heroes.
-It's time to join, my son. The day of the MBL has returned- whisper Eurostar.
-Ghaaa, shuppa duppa pahhh!- answer Snake_headed_son!
And, in a puff of smoke, EUROSTAR IS GONE!
***
The Time Trust:
We need a good arch-enemy. Anyone care to take on the MBL?
***
LLANCE:
Gee, I've just signed in and viewed our official symbol and I think I'm starting to tear up! It feels so good to belong! Now, where can I buy a tee-shirt?
***
Thread Killer:
DIE!
------------------
DIE!
Nemesis of the New MBL!
***
M'xy:
OH MY GOD!!!!!!
THAT'S THE GUY THAT CALLED ROBBIE-BOY'S ATTENTION TO US, KILLING THE ORIGINAL MBL!!
WE'RE DEAD!!!!
cool
***
Joker1:
Threadkiller won't prevail. The NEW MBL is going to fight till the end, even if it means more death and devestation.
***
The Indestructible Man:
I think Threadkiller just wants attention...or perhaps to be our villain...
anywho, we're getting damn close to 100 posts here (this is #98 I believe)
***
victorcreed:
##100 ha
***
The Indestructible Man:
100!
Man I'm jazzed -- I was coming out of class and found a table selling Girl Scout Cookies! I've got Samoas and Thin Mints, so I am SO set...
ah crap, VC!
you beat my cookie story!
***
victorcreed:
heh. that was cool.
***
The Indestructible Man:
fine, but don't expect me to share my Thin Mints with you, Vic!
***
victorcreed:
thin mints suck. fat ***
***
The Indestructible Man:
yeah -- but you ain't gettin' any Samoas either -- them chocolate/coconut things kick serious ass...
***
but I like those and the lemon ones are good too!
***
Thread Killer:
I am the "evil twin brother" (with a physical defect) of one of your own! I have come to destroy you all!
{Actually, I'm just bored and want to have some fun. One of you figured out who I am when I first appeared.)
***
The Indestructible Man:
ahh... (ignoring our new nemesis long enough for a good threat to build that we can fight off)
actually, a serious question a la the one I asked the LLB:
I read as many of the old MBL adventures I could before they got killed off by Rob, but I don't know what the order was and what I missed -- can anyone give the short short version of the MBL's history? (I see references to old stuff like Gooz and HERO and Prometheus X on the new thread...)
just wondering, so as to give some temporary serious meaning to this thread while the stories go on at the new thread and Yahoo...
***
Eurostar:
Yeah, me too am interested in the History of the MBL. Maybe we should do a Secret files and origins of the MBL topic.
***
The Indestructible Man:
I started up a new topic on ODCUT last night:
check out:
"Message Board League: Secret Files & Origins #1"
go look it over, and long-time members contribute to the stuff posted in the table of contents...
***
M'xy:
Okey TK (he, just like Tonkey Kong!)(that was a hint)
I know yer dirty little secret...
***
The Indestructible Man:
I figured that one out quite a while ago to, M'xy -- so the secret is now known by members within the current MBL
007, I know your secret too...
Hey all -- keep on posting to the MBL SF&O, so all the newbies can better understand the universe in which all the stories are happening!
actually, a pair of random MBL questions:
1. Does the MBL and the LLB exist in the same universe, or on parallel boards?
2. Which supergroups have there been on Earth-MB? (MBL, MBS, AAS...)
***
Eurostar:
There was an European Messagge Board League.
I tried to apply when I was a junior member, but they simply ignored me.
***
The Very Destructible Man:
I remember reading tales of MBL Europe -- between that and when Europe disappeared, that continent's got a lot of coverage...
How many tales of the Golden Age groups (MBS, AAS, etc.) were ever actually written?
***
The Indestructible Man:
whoops...just try and ignore my evil counterpart -- he just wants to be me, but has no superpowers...
----------
::WHACK!!!::
VD-Man: OOOOOOOUCH!!!! MY HEAD!!!
I-Man: Shaddup, or I'll yank out that stupid goatee next time! Now scram!
The Very Destructible Man takes a hint and runs away post haste...
----------
Of course, that doesn't mean you shouldn't answer his surprisingly cogent (for him) question...
carry on, nothing to see here...