by TheTimeTrust
My name is Kristofer Schanz. I'm a scientist. Hmm... I suppose the word "scientist" as a description of my career is too vague. My field of expertise is chemistry, and thus I am a chemist.
Now, I am not given to ego, but I am considered by those in my field to be one of the greatest chemists in Europe. I detest false modesty greatly, and although it may seem rude to do so, I must concur -- I am one of the greatest chemists not only in Europe, but in the world.
Yesterday, I quit my job.
Have you ever heard of the parable about the hidden treasure?
"The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field."
--Matthew 13:44
This parable, although not quite applicable to my situation, should help one to understand the reason I quit my high-paying job at Lundgren Chemicals here in Stockholm.
It was while I was working on a type of polymer late at night three days ago that a brilliant idea hit me like a flash. Leaving the polymer project aside for the time being, I continued to work on my idea all night long. By morning, I was exhausted but excited beyond measure, for I had created a chemical compound that, when inserted into the blood stream, could change the very laws of probability to one's favor!
I am not a dishonest man, but naturally, since I had discovered this chemical on my own and not for the company, I chose to keep it a secret, since Lundgren Chemicals would likely not see it my way.
The possibilities for this "probability chemical" (which I have decided to name "Schanz" -- or Chance -- after myself) are almost limitless, but it was required that I test it out on myself.
That day, after I called in sick and went home and had a cat-nap for about thirty minutes (I was too excited to sleep any longer) I went to the corner store, and -- after swallowing a single drop of Chance -- I purchased three lottery tickets, each from a different lottery. Later that day, I discovered that I had WON ALL THREE LOTTERIES!
My hands were trembling now, but not because of the money. I put the lottery tickets in three envelopes and sent them away to my three favourite charities as anonymous donations; I was uninterested in gaining a fortune in that manner and the unwanted publicity it would involve.
Later that day, I performed another experiment at a local pub. After swallowing another drop of Chance, I entered a popular Stockholm disco pub and found that I had the attention of every beautiful, available and intelligent woman within. It was difficult to turn each of them down when they asked me out on dates; I have loftier goals for Chance, however, and although I hope to marry a good woman someday and have several children, I cannot permit myself to have a "love-life" as yet.
My third experiment involved the most physical risk to myself. Although I had been a star athlete in college, and I am still in excellent health at my current age of twenty-seven, it had been years since I had attempted anything foolhardy; after all, I had been concentrating on my career in chemistry since graduation. Thus, it took quite a bit of courage for me to attempt this next experiment.
It required the use of a plane, which I luckily found at a bargain-basement price. As soon as we had arrived at a point five kilometres from the Swedish coastline above the Baltic Sea, I directed the pilot to allow me to parachute out of the plane. As he had his back turned, I sabotaged the parachute with a pocket-knife, and then I swallowed no less than three drops of Chance before donning the faulty parachute and jumping out of the plane.
We were two-hundred and fifty meters above the water when I exited the plane. As a creeping fear rose in my stomach, I counted the seconds that passed by before I finally opened the parachute. As I expected, the parachute was useless and did nothing to stop my fall. For the next few moments I felt as if my life were flashing before my eyes. Was the pursuit of scientific truth really worth risking my life in such a foolhardy manner? Yes. As I said, I'm a scientist.
I was less than twenty metres above the water when a sudden gust of wind blew me violently upwards. It was a miracle! The exponential rate of speed of my fall to earth was cut down drastically. But I was still heading toward the sea, with no land or boats anywhere in sight.
Just as I hit the water (with no more force or speed than one would have while diving off of a high-diving board at a swimming pool) I saw out of the corner of my eye a large, dark shape. I fell underneath the water level for a moment, but I was then pushed upward by a giant object coming from beneath me. It was a few moments more before I realized that I was riding on the back of a sperm whale! Another miracle.
That whale took me all the way to an island, where I caught a boat (someone who couldn't use it gave me their ticket at no charge) back to Stockholm and back to my home.
I went in the next day and quit my job, explaining that I was under a great deal of stress lately and wished to go on a sabbatical. The truth?
I want to put my creation to good use in a way that will benefit mankind. I want to be a hero. I already have the looks and the build for it (I'm blonde, muscular and stand at six-feet-two-inches), and I believe that I can show the world that those with special powers can be a boon to mankind, not just a danger. All I am waiting for is a chance.