Karen's testimonial
The evolving story of Karen - Jan 2021
These are the text messages and comments on the periodic 'thank you' cards from Karen 70+ since we started working together on the issues stressing her, her daughter Eva of 50 yrs and granddaughter Emily of 19 yrs. (Her journey continues)
Thank thank thank you! You have brought so much calm, peace and joy into my life - as well as my loved ones' lives. And continues to grow everyday. With much gratitude. - On her thank you card of April 2023
I always get new understandings when we meet as I continue on my path to strive to be progressively less stupid. You always seem to focus your time and attention to lift up others and to help them feel better. July 6 2023
Anytime we meet with you brings great insight and guidance. it is always a step forward. July 4 2023
Somehow I held it together. Without your advice and counsel as I continue to become progressively less stupid each day. June 22 2023
Meeting you has been an incredible blessing in so many ways. April 22 2023
I am becoming a compassionate communicator thanks yto you. My NVC seems to have a rippling effect. Thank you so much fopr yuor persisrtenat and patient adn wise guidance for making this this progress possible. April 3 2023
My minimal study of NVC has already mde me more aware of my and others' words and action. It is amazing. Looking forward to delving more into it because I know the emormouus differece just my beginnig study has made. Thank you for that. While I am a work in progress the journey and the changes are amazing. And now there is a certain feeling I have that makes me look forward to interactions now instead of dreading them. I guess because I have the tools now that work. I truly am becoming less stupid. Nov 30 2022
THANK THANK THANK YOu . WHAT A BREAKTHROUGH!!! Without your patience, wisdom and insight with NVC I never would have come to that awareness regarding my adult daughter. Amazingly it has lifted me up. I was able to see and feel more clearly. Freed me from the incredible heaviness, worry and feeling so helpless and of being out of control. The understanding and deep application of NVC may come little slowly as it percolates but then then POW! it clicks it is there and the need to take sides to get your point across to be in charge and control disappears and the solution appears and it is so clear. Nov 18 2022
Just want to let you know every day I am taking a step sometimes a tiny sometimes big of connecting before correcting and am beginning to say my needs and how I feel and /or can we work together or would you be able to or agree to. Nov 9 2022
Amazingly I survived without you. Nov 5 2022
I sure hope I am more of a giraffe than a jackal most of the time, and hope to better speak giraffe every day. Thank you for your persistence in moving me in this direction. Oct 18 2022
Thank you.I have been breathing more. Feel lighter and happier not sure it is the breathing or your session. Sept 22 2022
The past week with my daughter was awesome. Probably one of the best times together in a very long time. No conflict. Just smooth and comfortable. I think because you taught me how to truly listen and feel what others are saying rather than trying to get my point across . Connecting first. It was amazing. Thank thank thank you. Sept 20 2022
Thank you so much for visiting my daughter with me at the rehab center. You gave so much of your time but more improtantly your heart, soul, kindness, understanding, incredible spiritual wisdom and insight. There are not words to express my gratitude for your presence in my family's life. Thank you, thank you , thank you. Thank you for talking some "sense" into me. Aug 31 2022
It has been complicated and interesting while my daughter was here. I utilized yours and Rosenberg's coping skills some of the time and some times I reverted back to my old self. Because of you I am catching my breath, and regrouping and getting back to my routime. Because of you I'm seeing myself and my reactions and the responses so much more clearly. Aug 13 2022
Thank you so much CS for all your insight, concern and caring so much to bring us together. We so appreciate all you have done and your continued support. June 13 2022
Thank you for listening and supporting, giving me ideas and being a sounding board. I really don't know how I could have and continue to go thru this without your advice, counsel and suggestions and possible solutions. May 10, 2022
...At 78 I am learning that I don't need to say yes. I am learning to do things in my own time, thanks to you. Not when and because someone else makes a request. I think Marshall Rosenberg is finally becoming a part of how respond too. I feel comfortable scheduling one thing at a time so I have freedom to meditate, walk, read and learn ang get not just ,y house but me back in order in a way and time that makes me feel good THANKS TO YOU!! Apr 6, 2022
...Your wise words mean a lot. My daughter and I had an awesome time, much to your guidance and counsel. It was I who changed thru greater awareness which resulted in an amazing interaction. Apr 5, 2022
...With your help and counsel and guidance I am seeing, hearing, feeling and thinking more clearly. Mar 30, 2022
All of what you said makes incredible sense. I will process it. ...Thank you for thinking of me and how to help and caring so much. I feel very very blessed to have you in my life. Mar 18, 2022
I have got an awesome inspiring coach and counselor! Feb 26, 2022
I love all your suggestions. I plan on working on them to continue my progressively less stupid journey... Thank YOU. Feb 25,.2022
Emily (granddaughter) wanted her dad to call you. He agreed because she said you were the only one who really helps her. So here we are. Major breakthrough. After talking to you, her father said you were awesome. I think I applied lots of what you taught me. I thought about what you said about establishing boundaries, else I will be on the edge 24/7. But I am becoming progressively less stupid everyday because of you, your guidance and counseling, although I sometimes need to complain and get it out. When you live alone, you don't a sounding board or someone to hear about what is going on in your life. There are times I think most people need to process or vent or cry which I rarely do. But occasionally am so overwhelmed by other people's situations. I need to let it out or it will go to a place in my body - my high blood pressure, asthma and gall bladder infection. I typically in the past always held my stress inside and didn't let others know of my burdens. If I don't get to express what is weighing heavily on me, how I will I know how to create a plan? I must be missing something. But I do believe talking about and focusing on something causes it to expand as Wayne Dyer said. (I replied "But at the end of venting, to discharge your stress, we will work on a plan to not let the same problem come up again and again and again. If venting is energizing, I am all for it."). To this she replied - Now that is awesome. here I thought mastered life. I guess until our last breath we can try to be progressively less stupid or until we can walk on water. Jan 28, 2022
"Thank you for all you have done, all you continue to do, for all your time, your patience and sharing your wisdom and guidance" - on her 'thank you card' Jan 21, 2020
I am slowly absorbing these concepts and slowly making changes in my responses. I still haven't mastered having my reactions. But that is Ok, I will get there. How I respond though is making huge changes in how I feel and my stress levels. Now I will also process your second gem of wisdom. It is so true. I have to learn how to honor the path or I guess a better word is respect the path the others are on. As I truly don't know all aspects of another's journey of how they have become who they are and not try to change them when all I can do is to change my perspective. Thank you, you are so incredibly insightful and amazing. I never would have these life skills or tools without your coaching, your recommendations for book after book and concept after concept and it was only after repetition or continuing our weekly discussions and or meetings for this past year did the concepts "gel" with me so I could actually use them. It has been enormously life changing. Thank you , thank you. Every night is a better night now because of what I am practicing because of your influence including the breathing and meditation too! Jan21, 2022
I certainly need your connection wisdom, not ready to go it alone yet! Jan 12, 2022
I do think Emily is in the process of turning a corner , 90% because of your kindness, encouragement, patience and persistence, in guiding her. And 100% in guiding me to how best to respond in trying situations so they have better outcomes. You are helping me become progressively less stupid everyday. I noticed that when I was away and we had 2 weeks of no contact , I faltered a bit. I need to keep in constant connection to learn these critical ways to relate non-judgmentally and to "connect before correcting" as Rosenberg said. Dec 20, 2021
That is absolutely fantastic the way you explained to Emily how not speaking about the past trauma affects her behavior. It is a huge step. You explained it so well. Other therapists don't explain why, what and how therapy helps. Now she is seeing how it can help her and others! Thank you! Thank you! Dec 18, 2021
I have dragged Emily (granddaughter) to over 6 therapists who were not of much help. She thinks you are the one who helps her most. Dec 16, 2021
I was making much progress but then got disconnected from your guidance and wisdom while away . As Wayne Dyer said "you can pull spandex to a whole new dimension but if you don't keep the pressure on, it snaps back to its old dimension." Dec 15, 2021
Thank you for your guidance and Marshall Rosenberg, I am becoming progressively less stupid and less reactive. I am ready for any controlling behavior by others if it happens. Nov 24, 2011
Feeling much better and progressively less stupid . Nov 21, 2021
Things are going much better, thanks to your coaching and guidance. I have read a lot of the book "Emotionally Immature parents". It is clicking. I like the focus on the outcome, not engaging, to be observing, not to be reactive. Nov 18, 2021
I hear your voice and wisdom guiding me when I need it! Oct 25, 2021
There are no words that can express my gratitude/appreciation/thanks to you for helping me see and feel more clearly, more happy/more accepting/more understanding/ more at peace ..............Thank you Oct 2, 2021
Thank you CS. I love the idea of prioritizing my 'To do" list. You helped Emily a lot already and she is hearing and listening to you. Aug 24, 2021
You made Emily (Granddaughter) smile and laugh. May be we should introduce her to the quote of Marshall Rosenberg ""Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly. We don't aim at perfection. We try to be progressively less stupid." It softens everything for me. Thanks for keeping me on track with that. I really don't know what I and Emily would do without you! Aug 17, 2021
Yes. Great advice on that. So thankful and grateful you are holding my hand guiding and leading me through these discoveries and transformations. You have to write a book!! Aug 1, 2021
Thank you again CS. Without you, I think I would be living in Four Winds Psychiatric Hospital. July 26, 2021
Thank you for all you have taught me. Your wisdom is what is helping me stray centered and smiling this week . Many moments have been "interesting" and challenging but I have many life preservers to grab on to to keep myself from getting stressed or at least less stressed! I haven't acquired enough skills yet not have practiced the ones you have shared and taught to have graduated. Still need instruction and much much more practice. But it feels absolutely wonderful to feel in charge of being able to more positively deal with my reactions and responses. Because of you I truly think I am seeing and feeling more clearly and responding with a clearer and softer heart. July 22, 2021
Every time we speak, I have a little and sometimes, a big breakthrough. Connecting or telling to connecting and or engaging is one of my huge awareness that becomes more and more clear to me on how to incorporate in everyday life. I am truly becoming "progressively less stupid" and I am enjoying living more with day to day awareness. July 6, 2021
I really appreciate your deep concern. I really do. Your insight and caring has helped me get through so many difficult days. July 1, 2021
Because of your concern and suggestions, I am seeing the situations more clearly and your guidance is giving me the tools I need to help Emily and helping her. I am helping myself feel so much better as it is providing solutions to some very difficult interactions. June 23, 2021
Thank you CS. Looking forward to doing tomorrow what I remember of the Yoga stretching that we did at the park this morning. I loved it and I loved feeling so calm, renewed, refreshed and clear. Thank yo u so much. June 15- 2021
Thank you CS for your motivation, coaching, wisdom, teaching, guidance, insight, humor, analogies, metaphors, unconditional time, support, friendship, caring, love and so much more. (On her 'thank you card') June 14, 2021
You and your techniques don't just work, they transform both of us [myself and Emily (granddaughter)] . You have been placed in my life by God.
I asked Emily (my granddaughter) how she felt after she talked to you about responding to the verbal abuse of her father. I actually think talking to you empowered her tremendously. She was and I was at a loss how to respond to her father's verbal abuse of calling her a monster. As a father, he says such outrageous things to her that I can't even begin to coach her on how to respond. I will have her practice it to morrow. She felt so much better having a respectful way of responding to her father's abusive words. (See the different ways of responding to her father we discussed in this page) You are helping her so very much and helping me help her in a much more positive way. Previously I would let her see my anger at her father for all his failings and that only hurt her more. You are indeed a gift from God. June 7-2021
I feel so centered, positive and have an inner calm. Thank you for your wisdom, guidance, kindness, metaphors, humor and quotes. Thank you, Thank you. June 2-2021
Your guidance is helping me so sooo much in expressing & focusing on "What's is right... instead of what is wrong" when I talk with my daughter Eva and we are actually hearing each other...I think ...thank you!!! May 21-2021
You are my inspiration ... and my eyes to see and my heart to feel ...the best solutions to move forward. May 18
I know.my Emily (granddaughter) has many challenges in her life. I think that's part of reason you are in my and her life. I thank God every night for your concern, support, guidance and suggestions. May 17- 2021
I am so happy that Emily (her granddaughter) has you for support when she needs it and feels comfortable reaching out to you. I am sooo happy she has connected with you. You are responsible for her feeling good about herself in soo many ways. I need your ongoing support and counsel to keep me on his path! April 18-2021
Dear CS: How your wisdom, words and guidance has brought laughter back into my life and a lightness in my steps. Thank you Thank you Thank you March 26 2021 (Written on card)
Because of ur wisdom.. guidance....metaphors .. compassion. ..empathy..... my eyes can see better ..my heart can feel better... my brain processes better....I feel soooo soooo much lighter. THANK THANK YOUUUU Mar 9 2021
That is fabulous! I know Eva (assumed name of her daughter of 50 years who has no control of her body due to Multiple Sclerosis and now in a Rehab unit) is looking forward to you working with her. Respiratory at the Rehab said they feel she is making some progress. She is breathing on her own for several hours a day. So my younger daughter & I think Eva is ready for your help as she feels she can make progress! Thank you!!!!! We are certainly a huge challenge. But because of you making amazing changes...huge changes for me and I know Emily and Eva will achieve huge changes too if they commit themselves to working with you . I am praying that they will 🙏Mar 5-2021
And thank you for today...my mind is getting clearer and heart cleaner every time we speak. Really I am ..it’s so wonderful to feel that freedom and openness. Mar 1 -2021
Wow...that is awesome. I think that is because Emily feels you really care about helping her so she feels comfortable and trusts you. I thank God everyday I picked up your handouts in your daughter’s office (Office of Padma Sripada MD) Feb 28-2021
Yes. I received and read it. It’s good advice and I agree to focus on Emily’s future not the past. I know if I don't. my health will be challenged. So thank you for pointing that out.. I don’t know where I would be without your guidance and encouragement and support. I just thought in terms of you talking or listening to her to understand how the one and only social connection and relationship she had has ended so naturally Glenn (assumed name of Emily’s boyfriend) is her complete focus. She has no other family or human relationship that is meaningful to her. Feb 27-2021
THANK YOU CS!! I feel so great...so much lighter...happier. positive...calm. hopeful. My head...my thoughts are truly becoming clearer...my heart more clean, open and loving...every time we speak every time we connect... life is getting better and better! Feb 16-2021
Yes...CS.. Emily (my granddaughter) actually read that to me yesterday. I think it made her feel so good that you are genuinely concerned about her and want to help her. I will continue to connect with her with empathy before I suggest any change Or criticism. I have learned so much from you in such a short time thank you Feb 14-2021
I am doing better thanks to you...and the breathing. Am more present ..aware of thoughts & feelings & how what & when to speak or respond or just NOT speak or respond. AND Does that feel good.....actually...great! But I need to keep up the focus & momentum. I am so relieved and heartened that my granddaughter (Emily - an assumed name) felt that comfortable and safe to be so open with you. I agree that is a huge step for her. I am thankful she connected with u and u lifted her up a bit. She did mention she was glad she talked to you. She agrees she should continue to make progress. I think it’s a huge step and a big start...thanks to you ...I pray every day she'll do better and better and thank God every day that you are in our lives. Feb 5-2021
" Thank you CS. I don’t know how I would have and continue to get through and work through all “this” without you. I thank my stars for a “Friend, Coach, Counselor, Therapist, Advisor, Supporter, and Guide” like you. Jan 26-2021 (Written on the ‘Thank you’ card) (Her journey started)
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