Dramatic changes for a young man

Following is the remarkable case of dramatic life changes that happened to "Paul" (name changed), who was in his twenties.

I periodically met him at a UPS store. He was friendly. I gave him my meditation handout and suggested that he try the technique at night for better sleep. He practiced the meditation using my handouts. He did not attend my classes. I did not give him detailed instructions for many months. Whenever I met him on business, I inquired about his meditation practice and spoke a few encouraging words. After about 9 months, I invited him to come to my classes on learning about his long-standing depression and other problems.  

On my subsequent visits, he said he was practicing the meditation and was happy with the results. On my request, he sent the following feedback. 

Letting all the little things fall away

“As someone who deals with the public daily, I take a lot of abuse. My job has a lot of stress. As a result, I’ve become short-tempered, especially when I have a bout of insomnia, which I’ve had most of my life.

By practicing the ‘meditation on breathing’ technique, I am able to calm myself physically and mentally, letting all the little things that bother me throughout the day fall away. It helps me to keep things in perspective and get a decent eight hours of sleep every night.”

Feb 2013

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Dealing with rude customers calmly

The other day I had too many customers, and some of them were rude. To keep my cool, I went to the back room, did my breathing meditation for a while, calmed myself, and came out. I do this so I can have a good night’s sleep without thinking of all such incidents.

March 2013

I could cut back my mental health medications

“I work in a stressful job where even taking time to walk away from a situation wouldn’t calm me down. At one point I was on three different medications for more than 2 years. I decided to try ‘meditation on breathing’ because it was simple, and I figured what could it hurt?

I started practicing the meditation at night, so I could get proper sleep, then gradually moved my practice into my day. I made it a daily thing, even if it is just for a few minutes a day. I even found I was doing it without thinking about it.

I could calm my mind more easily. Then I could go back to deal with a particular situation more clearly.

After a time of using the finger modes of the meditation on breathing, I was able to cut back my mental health medications. Don’t get me wrong – this isn’t a cure-all. I am still on one medication, but one is a lot better than three. Plus, with a clearer mind, I find my life in general more manageable, and I am finding I can enjoy my life again.”

July 2013

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Insomnia and stress relieved

He practiced the ‘meditation on breathing’ by himself for about 9 months. He told me that he had severe insomnia and depression for many years and was on medication. He shared the following feedback when he came to my first class.

Insomnia

Before: He had insomnia almost all his life. Sometimes he could not sleep for two days in a row.

Now: He has been using the segment mode of meditation and enjoying sound sleep.  His insomnia is completely resolved. 

Stress at work

Before: He works in a packing and shipping store. Being the person responsible for handling customer complaints about damaged parcels, he had to face the angry outbursts of some customers, sometimes even threatening physical gestures. Such situations were unnerving and extremely stressful to him.

Now: He was able to keep his cool in such situations. The claims due to damaged parcels upset the owner of the store as she had to bear the losses. She used to take out her frustration on the employees. One day, all the employees were almost walking out of the store. Paul kept his cool and persuaded the other employees to stay back, explaining that the owner was behaving like that due to her stress and she did not mean to hurt their feelings. He was surprised at this dramatic change in his attitude and attributes it to his practicing this calming meditation.

Sept 2013

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Anger, Anxiety, and Disturbing thoughts reduced

He reported improvement on a host of mental, physical, and relationship issues. Also a dramatic reduction in the following concerns that he experienced before practicing the meditation techniques.

Anger: Relieved by 80%

Anxiety and Stress: Relieved by 70%

Disturbing thoughts and feelings: Relieved by 95%

Before: “Something very bad may happen every day.”

Now: “So much less. In most situations, I can handle, and I am working on the ones I have problems with.” 

For the first time in many years, he is now thinking of a career plan for which he had no inclination due to his depression, anxiety, and stress though he was a graduate. 

Sept 2013

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A lie retracted

"Hi Suryanarayana, I have to be honest with you. When I told you I had gotten a blood test, it was a lie. I didn't get one. I'm not sure why I lied in the first place, maybe it is what I had thought you would want to hear, or maybe I was just scared to talk about my mental disorder at the time. However, that is no excuse for my action. I am truly sorry for what I did. You deserve to know. I at least owe you that. 

The things you have shown me truly help. I am becoming a better person because of you. I understand if you do not wish to meet anymore because of this, and again I am sorry. Please do not stop what you are doing to help people because of what I have done." 

I responded by email 

"I greatly appreciate your honesty and courage in confessing your lapse. What you lied about was your personal matter, not affecting anyone else. That day, you spoke in a manner you felt comfortable. Many of us do this. But all of us may not have the courage to confess, like you have shown. 

You had enough trust in me to confess. I consider myself privileged for earning that trust. Let us try to understand this incident from a broad human perspective. 

There are three guys inside each of us. One is the 'Boss guy' who ultimately decides on the contradictory issues like a judge in a court. 

Second is the 'Truth guy' who cares only about telling the truth, not caring for the consequences.

The third is an 'Image guy' who only cares about projecting a positive self-image, to feel secure and please himself and others. He does not care how he achieves this goal. 

Often, a clash occurs in our minds between the second and third guys, like the one you have experienced. The day you lied about the blood test, the 'Image guy' took over, suppressed the 'Truth guy', and made himself feel secure. 

After a few days, the 'Truth guy', who was feeling snubbed, presented his case strongly before the 'Boss guy'. 

Finally, the 'Boss guy' in you was strong enough to decide the case in favor of the 'Truth guy' and silenced the 'Image guy'. Then you, the Boss guy sent this Email. 

All is well that ends well! I congratulate you for your achievement and hope my explanation resolves any feeling of guilt you may be carrying in your heart. Let us get back to business as usual. We learned a lesson. I am happy to be working with a person who has the courage to face the truth and confess to another person. I look forward to seeing the Food Diary and seeing you this Sat."

Nov 2013

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Improvements in depression, addictions, anger and disturbing thoughts 

I have been using the finger segment meditation technique for about six months now and taking classes to expand upon that foundation. 

As a result, I went from 3 antidepressants to 2. 

I have found my desire to self-medicate with alcohol and tobacco lessen. it's not to say that I don't slip up. But I have gone from several drinks a day to maybe a few per week. Smoking is all but eliminated, except for the occasional pipe tobacco. But cigarettes are done. I can't stand the taste anymore. 

The biggest change is that I no longer get angry as easily, and I don't hang on to that anger when I do. 

My disturbing thoughts and feelings are all but gone. It feels as though a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders. 

Now I am working on my weight problem and making life changes to live happier and healthier. 

I loaned Paul a book on healthy eating - “Eat more, Weigh less” by Dean Ornish M.D 

He also started practicing Yoga at home using a DVD. As a result, he lost about 20 lbs.)

Nov 2013 

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My waistline changed from 46 to 44, and I am building a New Me!

“I lost about ten pounds in a sustainable way. I no-longer fear going back to the way I was.” said a client who practiced the meditation initially on his own from my handouts and then attended 10 of my classes.

As someone who has fought the proverbial battle of the bulge most of his life, I know how hard it can be to make life changes. I have been through the crash diets, to doctors, and so on with varying degrees of success. However, the weight would always come back. I had pretty much given up.

Then one day, I picked up a handout on meditation on breathing, mostly because it said it could help with my insomnia. To my surprise, it did help a lot, and with more than just my lack of sleep.

Eventually, I was convinced to try taking the classes. Through the classes, I have been keeping a food diary and trying new changes in my diet. I was even watching a subliminal video. This isn’t like the crash diets I’ve been on, and it’s not pills.

In keeping the food diary, I am able to keep track of what I’m putting in my body (when you first start, you may be shocked). I started my changes gradually and in a way that I didn’t feel deprived. The changes I have made so far are

Drink water at least half an hour before food.

More whole, unprocessed foods like vegetables and whole grains like brown rice and rye bread.

I added beans and salad to at least one meal a day.

And the real hard part – I cut down on my drinking beer and my meat (didn’t stop but cut down).

As I implemented these changes, I found my tastes have changed as well as my waistline from 46 to 44. I now only feel deprived if I miss my daily salad.

I have lost about ten ponds, in a sustainable way (300 lbs to 286 lbs in 5 months). I no-longer fear going back to the way I was.

I am building a ‘new me’.

Feb 2014

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For the first time, I can look forward to today instead of dreading it

It all started with a meditation handout Suryanarayana was printing in the store I worked in. At first, I didn't give it much thought. However, after yet another bout with insomnia, I decided to give the counting breaths meditation and segment mode a try. (What could it hurt?). 

After a few nights of doing this meditation, found to my astonishment and relief that my insomnia was gone. 

After I told Surya and thanked him, we got to talking. Eventually, I found that he taught classes in this technique and others. We set up a time that worked for both of us, and we met. 

After that first class, I was still not entirely convinced but I checked out his website and began incorporating other simple techniques into my day.

Now, a few years later, I drink way less than I did before. Quit smoking, I'm working on my weight, and climbing out of a deep, dark depressive hole that I've been in since I was 15. 

With the help of this meditation, I can deal with people and situations better than I have in the past, as well as have some peace of mind. 

For the first time in a long time, I can look forward to today instead of dreading it.

March 2015

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Got off all antidepressant medications

Paul got off all the three antidepressant medications per the advice of his primary care doctor. My primary goal in working with him has come true.

Aug 2016

Career changes

When Paul got over the severe depression and gained confidence, he gave up the job at UPS store and joined a local cleaning company. He had many immigrant co-workers who were not getting due wages and benefits. So, he volunteered to be their shop steward and fought with the company to ensure they were paid due wages and benefits. This was the same Paul who could not face an aggressive customer and went to the back room, breathed a few times to calm himself and came back! 

While he was doing the cleaning at a state office, the staff came to know him, liked his demeanor, and advised him to apply for a state job as he was qualified. He applied and got the job. After a couple of years, he got into a desk job with an important state function in the office, befitting his qualifications. 

Paul was a talented artist. He made many artistic items for me (a mobile with discarded CD's, pebbles painted with the 'counting breaths logo' and greeting cards. 

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The breathing meditation is something I do every day 

His message after more than 4 years.

"Hi Surya, I know I'm not great at keeping in touch, but I just wanted to say hi. I've been doing well with everything that has been going on. Besides work and political activity, I have been doing some miniature model painting for a friend, and I have been talking to the state park about putting miniature fairy houses along the story trail that they have. If that doesn't happen, I may work with a local art organization to make it happen elsewhere. 

I keep sending people the link to your meditation website. The breathing meditation is something I do every day, though weekends offer more time for a longer session. I hope all is well with you and you are enjoying life. Be well, my teacher and friend."

July 2018

I'm surprised at how far I've come

Recently, 7+ years after he ended the classes, I sent the above summary of his reports to him to let me know if he wished to make any changes. He approved it as it is in his email quoted below.

"I would keep them just as they are. I've read them over several times, and I'm surprised at how far I've come. I still use the meditation and finger tip and segment modes. I find myself using the breathing meditation without realizing it."

Jan 2024

I'm still on a light dose of antidepressant but a lot more resilient 

When I asked him end of Jan 2024, if he was still off all antidepressant medications, he replied "The fact is that I was off of my antidepressant medication during that time. And I made it through up until 6 months into lockdown to almost 2020, which in all fairness, facing a modern plague, the threat of nuclear annihilation, and the Trump administration, most people got to realize what depression is. I'm still on a light dose now, just because things are still honestly crazy. On the flip side. I'm a lot more resilient than I was."

Jan 2024

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Relevant pages

Meditators' reports