Dating "Dealbreakers"
The eHarmony List
Excerpted from an article by Alexia Elejalde-Ruiz, Tribune Newspapers | November 01, 2011
As part of its matching process, the dating site eHarmony asks members to share the qualities that they "can't stand" in a partner. These aren't bothersome quirks, but real deal breakers that people should be aware of upfront so they can identify red flags, according to the site. Earlier this year, eHarmony analyzed the top "can't-stands" selected by its more than 720,000 members, who choose from 50 options. Here's how they ranked.
What men say they can't stand:
1. Lying
2. Cheating
3. Rudeness
4. Poor hygiene
5. Mean-spiritedness
6. Infidelity
7. Drugs
8. Anger
9. Excessive weight
10. Laziness
What women say they can't stand:
1. Lying
2. Cheating
3. Rudeness
4. Infidelity
5. Anger
6. Drugs
7. Poor hygiene
8. Mean-spiritedness
9. Laziness
10. Racism
Five Red Flags
Bethany Marshall, a licensed marriage and family therapist, offered five signs that a relationship is not going to work:
You work harder than your partner at fixing his/her life and improving the relationship.
You walk away from conversations feeling confused.
Your partner's future is getting brighter, while yours is getting dimmer.
You're a worse person when you're with your partner than when you're apart.
You have to suppress your personality when you're with your partner.