Imagine a realistic future that we might all want to live in. An attractive vision can unite people and create a common goal to pursue.
A culture of empathy is about people mutually and deeply listening to each other and deeply hearing each other. Then taking collaborative action to productively address their needs and create a sense of well being for everyone. It's about each person in the community being able to authentically express themselves and be heard to their to their satisfaction.
We need to create a vision
The training becomes the small steps toward building a culture of empathy. Trying to build a culture of empathy from where the worlds is at the moment can seem like an overwhelming and daunting task. In our training, we hold the vision that we are working toward and do in small manageable steps. Step by step we move towards our vision.
Being the One that Listens
People often share the discomfort or pain, about being the ones that listen and empathize with others in a conversation and that others do not reciprocate. It feels like one is talked over, is
From their individual perspective, they feel there is a problem with empathy because they are having to give it, and not get it back. Therefore to protect themselves they need to shut down, or limit their empathy.
From a relational or culture of empathy perspective, we see the relationship and the level of empathy in the relationship. We want raise the level of empathy in the relationship. So if one person is listening and empathizing, and the other does not reciprocate, there is an empathy deficit in the relationship. The solution is not to cut back on ones own empathic presence, and therefore foster a deeper empathy deficit in the relationship, but to find ways to increase the empathy.
Finding ways to raise the level of relational empathy is our challenge.
Empathy Circle. One way that does that is to bring the participants into an empathy circle. Each person gets time to express themselves, and to be heard. It brings a mutuality into the relationship. Each person speaks and is heard to their satisfaction.
This is doable in a structured and agreed upon process. It is more difficult in every day relationships and daily interactions.