Rita Czarny

I Like

• Susan's joyful and natural energy

• I enjoyed the variety of exercises

• I loved the pace of short moments of theory and short exercises

• Gazing was powerful as an exercise, I found.

• I treasure being part of such committed and 'empathic' community

I Wish that I could be here today and I hope to participate again in further play, training and discovery related to empathy

What if we did more of this? Went deeper?

Jessica Vogt

I Like….

• ​- ​the readings / poems

• - writing exercise on the screen to keep us engaged

• - content is clear and high value

• - the idea of role plays

• - Susan explains clearly what is going to happen next in the agenda. I love also the transparency.

• - good balance overall of speaking and exercises / break outs

• - hand out

I Wish….

• ​- bit more time during break out sessions. 2 min is very short. 4-5 min would be nice.

• - some explanation about “not OK corral”?? It seems that it is a US reference but I am not sure... I did not catch what it was about during the call and why it's a reference for the triangle.

• - powerpoint feels a little outdated and amateurish.

• - more time for check out

What if…

• ​- I was confused for the first call​ about "raising your hand". There is a feature on Zoom to raise your hand electronically, and I thought we were asked to use that. I realized that it is not the case here. Some clarification at the beginning would help to know what "kind of raising hand" we are meant to use.

• - the exemple of the family for the role play of the triangle put me off a little. I was thinking of people who did not grew up in a binary family like that and was wondering if the exemple would trigger some people. Also, I was curious about the dad/mum/kid dynamique. It felt very cliché to me the dad being the perpetrator, the rescuer mum and victim kid and distant myself from it a bit. Maybe it was necessary for the purpose of the exercise, at the same time, I felt disconnected.

• - the last session, when we were offering values, non verbal, feelings etc to Joannie, Susan added her input and talked for a while. I felt it took away the opportunity for participants to make their own guesses. Maybe leaving a bit more time and space for participants to try out would be helpful.

Bob:

I Like…. being part of this group very, very much.

I Wish…. I had known about the drama triangle and the wholeness circle when I was a teenager living with my family of origin.

What if… groups like this one spring up all over the planet?

Any Other Comments?

On Thursday, June 14, Elizabeth and I plan to be in Lone Pine, Calif., on the way home from Tahoe. Hope to be able to find an internet wi-fi connection there so I can attend the meeting.

Joel Berman

I Like….the technology. While it's not perfect, it creates a realistic facsimile of an in-person encounter. The chat room experience seemed authentic and was effective.

I like Susan's polished skill in offering us this training.

I like the enthusiasm and engagement of the participants.

I Wish…it were a little earlier in the day - 6 pm is not ideal. But I recognize the compromises that are necessary.

Cielja

I love that this is happening. Gratitude to Susan and Edwin

I love all the peers and indeed that all show up every time!

I wish I already knew how to do an online class with breakout rooms.

Other comment:

I realized why mentioning the triangle did not comply with how I would help people learning empathic communication: I am weary of anything analyzing, labeling, judging that can lead to stepping out of the situation, and thus block.

It is what therapists (have to?) do and what is creating distance between the people. It can set up for using a roadblock and getting the analytical mind working. To stay in the here and now with people has so many differences, nuances. Susan mentioned that herself as well.

Mentioning the non verbal communication has also a risk of becoming an analyzer, plus the speaker may get self-conscious and not knowing how to express themselves.

It is up to us to read the non-verbal communication as what they are conveying, not to mention how they did that.

Also wording like:

• I hear you,

• I hear where you are coming from,

• I can see what you mean,

• I really want to hear more etc are filler words and put the listener in separation as analyst, overseeing the other and therefore as judge.

The lead often for the listener to take the lead instead that the speaker is the leader of their own thoughts, feelings and expressions.

Joan Levine

• I Like the graphics being used to teach the material, the break-out sessions

• I Wish that we were given time to process after each sharing with our partner “My experience of being a listener, of being a speaker” rather than just switching….

• What if the visual with everyone could be designed as a circle?

• Other: Really great job of use of Zoom -

• How does one create the graphics such that we can see them? Just on computer???