A Noob’s March Madness Men’s Predictions, One Week Before It Starts

March Madness is an annual basketball competition in which 68 of the best men’s and women’s college teams face off in a single-elimination tournament. This event is extremely popular in the US, with over 14 million views solely for the finals in 2024. The tournament spans 3 weeks, and in the end, one college is crowned champion. Last year, the winner was UConn, who beat Purdue University in the 2024 NCAA finals. Now, when you read this, the tournament will already be over or at the finals stage, but keep in mind that I wrote this before it started.

This may be a joke issue on Leo, but I assure you: This article is my real opinion. To keep with the theme, though, I will tell you a joke: 

I kept wondering why the basketball was getting bigger.

Then it hit me.

For the answer to this next joke, you will have to read to the end of the story. That way, you will see that the article is my true opinion. Don’t skip to the end, or you will curse next year’s bracket! Okay, guys, I’ll tell you one more joke:

What kind of tea do football players drink?

I’ll tell you the answer at the end, and if you skip to the back now, you will lose your good luck.

March Madness fans get in on the game by trying to predict the winner of every single matchup. ESPN even gives a cash prize for the most accurate bracket. If you are interested, it is free to sign up. Despite the fact that there are more than 22 million participants each year, there has never been a participant who picked all of the rounds correctly.

Today, I will be going through my predictions of major games on the men’s side. I apologize to any reader who was also wishing for the women’s bracket predictions, but for this article, but I had to choose one gender due to time and space, so I decided on the men’s due to their popularity compared to women’s (please note that women's brackets are at an all time high). By the way, my dad went to Purdue so I will be biased towards them. 

Champion Prediction

Of course, I had to choose Purdue because of my bias, but the majority of the population doesn’t agree. According to ESPN, the leading prediction is that Duke will win, with 25 percent of the vote going towards them. Another popular choice is Florida, with slightly over 20 percent. Houston is the third-most picked. Wisconsin is a dark horse. Last year, this team lost to a 14th seed in the first round, but now I am positive they will make it through due to their massive offensive improvements.

Upset Prediction

I chose two upsets: 12-seed Colorado State beating 5-seed Memphis and 13-seed Grand Canyon beating 4-seed Maryland. Two other upsets I picked are New Mexico and San Diego. That’s all for my upset picks, but some analysts predict that Vanderbilt and VCU will beat BYU and Saint Mary’s, respectively. I am most confident in Colorado State beating Memphis because, throughout the season, I have seen Colorado State dominate their opponents on the court. Honestly, they should have had higher seeding. One final note is that Colorado State will be playing in the West, so this will be closer to home than Memphis.

Surprise Early Leavers

Early leavers are teams who are favored but get upset in the early rounds. In recent years, for example, Purdue has been falling short of expectations. In the 2023 season, they were a number 1 seed but lost to 16-seed Fairleigh Dickinson, which had only happened once before. So it pains me to say that Purdue has a strong chance of being an early leaver. Another early leaver could be Texas Tech, a team that lost in the first round to NC State last year.

If my predictions are wrong, I am truly sorry. Please email me your complaints or arguments. If you are still thinking about the joke, the answer is Penal-Tea! Have a good day and make sure to read the other articles in our section!